Nailed it. DA experience is pure pain. This is exactly how their family dynamic is. Superficial at best and apathetic at worst. My heart goes out to them for that experience, whatever is left of my shattered heart at any rate. No excuse to do that to another person. Period. I'd call it faux stoicism. I don't see anything stoic about avoiding taking responsibility and self reflecting. I get your point totally though. They truly see it as stoicism.
You keep me strong and not blaming myself for my frustration reaction towards the DA. I admired him but I also realized I wasn’t fulfilled quite early on. I just keep telling myself.
More nonsensical babble from Coach Ryan. My score is a solid DA every time I take the test, and Ryan's depictions never sound anything like me. Keep digging for that imaginary stash of internalized blame in my subconscious. Meanwhile I'll be over here enjoying my peace and quiet.
Yeah, I score DA and agree with a lot of the description: I am introverted, hyper-independent, emotionally out of touch, low empathy, hyper-sensitive to criticism, etc. EXCEPT I don't have the bit about connecting intimacy/commitment to some deeper negative feeling. Maybe others do though. Maybe I'm not DA without that last bit? But it's odd to hear the internet claim people like me are the villains. I've never hurt anyone who didn't hurt me first.
I understand it better than most (2 years with one of these cretins). And frankly, WHY doesn't matter. The jails/prisons are chock full of people with excuses for being monsters.
@@colscary true, and I acknowledge I have flaws and weaknesses - and indeed I AM trying to improve. But I don't recognize some of these things the internet is saying about people like me. Like I get that this is a short-form video that can't cover everything, but I connect with so much of what is in this one until the swerve at 6:22 into "when they do things like ghost cheat discard" and my reaction is WHOA WHOA I agree those are bad and that's not what I'm doing! And I think I have lots of avoidant male friends who are also NOT doing those things.
Nailed it. DA experience is pure pain. This is exactly how their family dynamic is. Superficial at best and apathetic at worst. My heart goes out to them for that experience, whatever is left of my shattered heart at any rate. No excuse to do that to another person. Period.
I'd call it faux stoicism. I don't see anything stoic about avoiding taking responsibility and self reflecting. I get your point totally though. They truly see it as stoicism.
You keep me strong and not blaming myself for my frustration reaction towards the DA. I admired him but I also realized I wasn’t fulfilled quite early on. I just keep telling myself.
Thank you for doing what you do! :)
Music too loud for me.
Can the trauma be compoundec by an adult relationship?
Adult relationships can absolutely compound preexisting attachment wounds.
More nonsensical babble from Coach Ryan. My score is a solid DA every time I take the test, and Ryan's depictions never sound anything like me. Keep digging for that imaginary stash of internalized blame in my subconscious. Meanwhile I'll be over here enjoying my peace and quiet.
Yeah, I score DA and agree with a lot of the description: I am introverted, hyper-independent, emotionally out of touch, low empathy, hyper-sensitive to criticism, etc. EXCEPT I don't have the bit about connecting intimacy/commitment to some deeper negative feeling. Maybe others do though. Maybe I'm not DA without that last bit?
But it's odd to hear the internet claim people like me are the villains. I've never hurt anyone who didn't hurt me first.
Defensiveness is a defense mechanism to protect one’s self from self reflection and accountability.
@@MilesIncognito '' I've never hurt anyone who didn't hurt me first.'' That ain't a kind philosophy to hold on to tho
I understand it better than most (2 years with one of these cretins). And frankly, WHY doesn't matter. The jails/prisons are chock full of people with excuses for being monsters.
@@colscary true, and I acknowledge I have flaws and weaknesses - and indeed I AM trying to improve. But I don't recognize some of these things the internet is saying about people like me.
Like I get that this is a short-form video that can't cover everything, but I connect with so much of what is in this one until the swerve at 6:22 into "when they do things like ghost cheat discard" and my reaction is WHOA WHOA I agree those are bad and that's not what I'm doing! And I think I have lots of avoidant male friends who are also NOT doing those things.