How To Get Away With A Sex Crime! | The Thirsty Sisters #15
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- If you are ever in a situation where your modesty was being compromised, here are some links:
www.aware.org.sg/
singaporelegal...
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Damsels in distress no more!!! To counter these nasty men, we discuss proactive strategies we can adopt to make sure justice is served, through the case study of our famous finger licking doctor and Sylvia’s very personal encounter.
02:25 Case 1 Doctor Charges dropped
10:10 How Sylvia Would Proactively React to the Previous Case Study
25:39 Sylvia Speak About Being Sexually Assaulted
35:54 What Sylvia Would Had Done Differently
39:16 What Society and You Could Do To Prevent Sexual Crimes
Sources:
Doctor accused of raping patient goes on trial
www.channelnew...
Doctor on trial for raping patient 'concocted elaborate story' in case DNA was found: Prosecutors
www.channelnew...
Doctor accused of raping patient found guilty of lesser charge of sexual assault
www.channelnew...
Doctor originally accused of rape is acquitted of all charges after Court of Appeal overturns convictions
www.channelnew...
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The Thirsty Sisters STAFF
Co-Founder - Sylvia Chan
Co-Founder - Nina Tan
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I totally agree with Sylvia that the words they say haunts you forever. I got molested in the massage parlour by my REGULAR massuse, and he whispered to my ear "我以为你出国读书，没有回来了” haunts me till this day.
I hope there's more education to parents as well, because my birth mother said to me and I couldn't believe my ears --> "molest is not rape, don't need to be so dramatic, call the police and make a big hooha!" -period.
I believe there are many other (older gen) similar parents out there who just want their child to sweep it under the rug, just because getting involved with the police is very mafan (a hassle) ....
(pls don't)
I got wasted with my friends after hearing that and I couldn't get over the fact that I was actually molested and there was no justice. She tried to dissuade me again but I went with my gut and reported it to the police 7 days later with a close friend. I regret not reporting immediately. And yes it does take time to sink in because the first few reactions would be confusion and denial before actually breaking down.
Conclusion, he denied molesting me and we are going to court to fight it out.
I didn't have to pay anything tho, because it's not me sueing him as an individual, it is because he broke the Singapore's law. It's kinda sg sueing him.
Thank you TTS for bringing out this topic!!
The fact that Sylvia is able to share her story without a fricking tear, it shows how strong she is. If were for me, I would dropped a tear or two as it will trigger me traumatically. Sister, I respect your strength.
Actually, Sylvia you did well during that point of time. People don’t understand that when these situations happen to them, the first reaction is usually not reacting in a logical way but to undergo a state of shock. Anyway, that part where you said you didn’t put up a fight in the lift, I think you did right. I’m a firm believer that those molesters love it when their victims struggle in fear or react violently. Those reactions in fact prompt their desire to dominate and force themselves on their victims even more. I want to add that it doesn’t matter if you’re a girl or a man, if you make a police report about sexual assaults the first question the police will ask is “Did you say no?”. So it’s very important to make sure that if you find yourself in such a situation that you say and record evidence where you tell the culprit: “No, don’t touch me.”
The classic lift attack happened to someone i know too.. There are several precautions children can adopt to protect themselves.
1. Avoid entering the lift with strangers, 2. Look out to make sure no one lurking at the void deck before entering the lift in case a stranger dashes in just before lift door closes, 3. After entering, always stand close to the panel so you can press the open button if someone dashes in, 4. Wedge a key between index and middle finger so that the key sticks out while holding a fist position. Be prepared to punch, the key is used to inflict damage on your attacker, 5. Coming home late at night, call ahead for a family member to pick you up at the bus stop/void deck, 6. No one to pick you up? Talk/pretend to talk on the phone until you reach home. Potential attackers may be conscious of potential 'ear witness', 7. Going out late? Wear shoes over slippers so you can step on your attackers toes and run if needed.
Can use slipper and whack the person?
@@th3grace OK what if I'm an athlete... Then I just throw at the person can?
well thats kinda interesting... good advice!!
I completely agree with the part about how these issues should be incorporated into SG's education system somehow. My memories of sex ed stays at "don't have premarital sex" and the range of STDs. No adult around me ever properly addressed the topic of sexual predators or taught me how to protect myself when something happens (telling your kids not to talk to strangers is not gonna help much tbh.) There needs to be a balance between academics and teaching about real-life issues.
We still lack an environment that helps victims talk about their experiences and get the help they need but this can't be achieved untill our law stops finding excuses to pardon sexual perpetrators and actually serve justice for victims.
when I was around 18 years old and I had rashes around my ku ku bird (on the land, not the tree) so I went to a Skin-specialist doctor. Given I have respect to doctors coz I have no medical knowledge. He asked me to take down my pants but of course, feels very paiseh to show my ku ku bird but at the same time, I trust him so I did. I took down my pants and underwear, BUT the doctor, professionally, asked me to handle, asked me to flip my bird up down left right like a fricking joystick in an arcade to see the surrounding. He doesn't dare to touch it but he just wanna observe it. Listening to this doctor-saliva case, shows me how much appreciation I have to my skin-specialist doctor.
This is just so sad that in society we have to protect our daughters or come up with a handbook to protect girls.
Rape or sexual assault doesn't happen because someone dressed provocatively or because they are unconscious. Rape or sexual assault happens when someone else decides that it's ok to touch someone without their consent. It is NOT OK. A naked, unconscious person does not mean you can touch them.
Rather than protect our daughters, EDUCATE OUR SONS.
TRUEEE
I see that y'all have included AWARE (SACC) in the description. I would like to share my awful experience with SACC last year, in hope that victims will be more cautious when approaching SACC. When I reached rock bottom in my life, going through the toughest and most bitter period of my life, I approached SACC for help, hoping to get out of my pain and suicidal thoughts. But my experience with SACC accentuated the turmoil I was in.
I was sexually assaulted and called SACC in hope of seeking some professional support /advice. The staff came off as inpatient, repeatedly interrupted me and I didn't get the chance to properly share my circumstances. So she made some assumptions and tried to advise me based on her assumptions.
She then mentioned that sometimes perpetrators are only given verbal warnings by the police (especially if he's a first time offender, no records etc, amongst many other factors.) I did tell her about how I was angry and frustrated at the perpetrator, broken and scarred by what he has done and I'm struggling to put whatever happened behind me. She then acknowledged the harrowing experience I went through and immediately when on to say how scary it will be for the perpetrator to be interrogated by the police, suggesting that it's equal now because both of us have been through some form of 'terror'. I'm shocked beyond words. Till today, I can't believe the lady over the phone said those words. Shouldn't she be able to empathise with me?
I'm so sorry about what you've gone through..
SO ANGRY OVER HERE >.
This is a criminal case so the lady didnt need to pay any money in terms of legal fees.
Doctors should have a chaperone when examining a female patient especially if there is a need to examine for example the breast or the vagina. Female patients should always insist for a female chaperone to be present before the examination proceeds.
Agreed, in order for male doctors to examine a female patient’s private parts, a female chaperone like a female nurse should always be present in the room.
there is, and in hospitals we do practice chaperone
yeapp i agree :)
The fact that he used his profession as a cover to commit such vile acts should already double penalise him. He used the patient's trust and his doctor's right to examine to commit these. How in the world could this case settled as him being innocent. I have an upcoming check up, normally I am on the aware of my surroundings but now I am also scared and paranoid.
A male doctor needs a female chaperone when he needs to do these kind of procedure... Don't be afraid to ask for it.
omy 2 tts podcasts released at once😱😱 this really makes my day!! thank u so muchh
I completely agree with Nina about earning children about all these things because I have gone through Singapore’s sex Ed and I really have to say I learnt basically nothing I mean learning about how to deal with such situations is much much much more important than just saying “don’t have sex before marriage” Edit: walking out of a situation and saying “at least (something bad) didn’t happen” just shows how fucked up what really happened was. Also I just wanna say that for those who have faced such things please don’t be pressure to share your story unless you’re ready. I mean Sylvia has taken 12 years to share this story and while its good to use your story as a case study you don’t need to feel pressured about it.
Slyiva you are so strong to go through all of this and can be able to share this story whithout too much fear
Not sure if the doctor will be "off guard" and forgot to put on gloves if the patient is an 89 yr old grandma?
My mother used to give me this alarm keychain. So when something go wrong, I can pull that trigger and it will sound an alarm. I don't know if it still exist but I think that was useful to protect girl like when I was young.
Slyvia, you mentioned sth that is important when we look back at traumatic incidents, and that is : "This is what I would have done differently." I tend to wallow in sorrow, so this piece of advice coming from you really hits close to heart truly that since you could face it and reflect on what you could have done, so can I. Kudos to you and Nina for raising these issues, and do continue to do so.
Jiayou Soon Hao!
@@sylsylchan Thank you, same wishes to you and Nina.
So sorry to hear your traumatic story, you are so brave to share it. I've had my share of creepy drivers trying their luck to chat you up, but luckily for me it never turned out to be anything physical. So something I used to do when I take cabs alone late at night, is to loudly make a fake phonecall (or a real one if my family is awake) to tell "someone" that I'm on cab number xxx and will be home soon. I feel that kinda deters the driver from trying anything funny, cos he will think that someone is waiting for you at your destination and that person knows his license plate.
Omg Nina, I'm so glad you said that this is more important than education. As a preschool teacher, I always tell both boys and girls from the start of N2 how important it is to protect your body in whatever circumstances. How they should always tell an adult if they ever came across such situations, even if it's their friends or teachers. It is so important and I hope parents will also talk to their child from young. People should not think that they are too young to understand because they are not.
The fact he said sorry makes me think he probably did something like this before and told himself not to do this shit again, but couldn’t hold it back and did that to sylvia. What a fucking guy🤬
Wow this episode is bringing up long forgotten memories of things that happened to me that i manage to forget. Until now. A creepy taxi uncle. A blind date setup by a friend. The same friend. So many incidents.
the initiative on the little handbook is really, really great! It's crazy how women have to constantly fear and question doctors, police officers, taxi drivers going on their normal lives even in this day and age.
thank you for sharing your story, Sylvia. As awful as it was, your words are going to imprint on many young girls to be vigilant and logical when something so traumatic happens. I'm a media student and I'd love to volunteer to contribute to the handbook if you guys need help with the content!
Just finished watching both Podcasts and I feel very sorry for everyone who was molested, schools really need to educate students.
I just want to say, I understand where you guys are coming from. It's time to be proactive and fight back to protect our ourselves.
But it's also important that we do not forget or move away from the focus of: what kind of toxic culture in the workplace, society influence and messed-up laws allow these predators to think it's okay and that they can get away with sexually assaulting others?
On a side note, Singapore law seems to protect women more.
Section 375 of the Penal Code states, “Any man who penetrates the vagina of a woman with his penis (a) without her consent; or (b) with or without her consent, when she is under 14 years of age, shall be guilty of an offence.”
It literally means, guys cannot be raped. They would not be charged under statutory rape, but S376 of the Penal Code - Sexual Assault by Penetration instead.
Source: irblaw.com.sg/learning-centre/rape-in-singapore/
Also, up until Feb 2019, married couples cannot accuse their spouses of rape.
Source: www.channelnewsasia.com/news/singapore/marital-immunity-for-rape-set-to-be-repealed-as-part-of-changes-11229224
Thanks for discussing this extremely important but sensitive topic. I hope this will further educate people on the backwards laws that Singapore needs to revise.
Hey, Sylvia and Nina, I am a subscriber I just want to say that when u r in shock u r still recovering from that and u can't think straight don't blame urself and Nina is right about having sex education in school for safety I was molested I wanted to tell someone but he threatens me if I tell my parent or the teacher he will hurt my brother. it still haunts me I never trusted any guy from that incident onwards. I try to stay strong during that time I am lucky that I changed school to a prestigious school. I am over it now. and my best friend in school doesn't even know. I tried to tell my mom but making me think that he will hurt my beloved brother makes me feel sick to my stomach. Btw I love ur channel. I listen to it every day and it helps me boost my day.
:((( i'm so so sorry that happened to you sylvia. that's absolutely awful and terrifying. i hope you are okay after sharing that story for the first time. lots of love and support.
how can we help! if you are going to run a fundraising campaign, i'd love to chip in. do keep us updated TTS.
It is important to have a safety contact feature on your phone for you to activate to call someone for help, activate GPS and activate a voice recorder so that it can record evidences.
really. from lady to lady. props to you guys for saying your words on this. for being brave for ladies who need your strength. you guys are amazing. cheers.
The last time my friends and i talked about this, i think more than half of us actually been through at least 1 experience of sexual harrassment. Its more common than we actually thought it is.
I reported my case to the police but other than questioning me for 2-3 times, no outcome, no resolution other than we dont know how to find this guy. LOL
I will be more than willing to help out with the handbook if you girls are planning to do one.
knowing what to do after being sexually harassed is one thing. but don't forgot how to prevent yourself from being a victim or protecting yourself during the situation.
1. never ever be alone by yourself, especially at night. at the very least, tell someone your location. no matter where you went, be with a friend. Dont have the mindset that you are safe. anything can happen anytime anywhere. sometimes being paranoid is a good thing.
2. learn abit of martial arts/defence. theres no need for a black belt or some high position. learn the basics is good enough. know where to hit:groin, eyes or bending a finger. use your knuckles, elbow, knee even your teeth if it allows you. there are videos and pictures online to demo.
3. bring a weapon with you. like nina mentioned pepper spray, ask your ah ma to make you a concoction, swiss army knife, keys,umbrella, a water bottle. have some sort of object capable of being decent damage. most of the time predators wont attack you if they see you can defend yourself with something.
4. trust your gut feeling. it tends to be right. at any moment in which you are not comfortable, do not proceed. like they always say, better to be safe than sorry.
im sure there are a lot more methods on how to protect yourself but this is what i can think of.
stay safe everyone.
i think when a woman goes through the same situation as the lady in the case, and she holds physical medical evidence that can suggest some outrage of modesty has taken place, quickly go to another clinic to seek another doctor's opinion and call the police.
This makes me doubt Singapore even more. Like Sylvia said, they would charge like so much if someone bought over firecrackers, but when it comes to cases like these, they charge so less sial. Like, people that don't know much about Singapore would always say that the law is so, wah. This makes me very upset... I truly feel bad abt the lady and Sylvia having to go through such traumatic incidents. I'm only a student which means I'm somewhat more vulnerable. And when she said abt the lady who should've shouted, I was like, u seriously think that they will help one meh? People these days are so selfish, they would ignore. I think the nurses would care but seriously, most won't really care.
I've been taught that male nurses need a female nurse to be present when they're attending to a patient so I don't see why, especially for gynes, female nurses can't be present to ensure the safety of the female patient?
Thank you for making this video, shared it to my sis so she can educate her childrens as young as possible. And believe me, shit happen anytime anywhere. Some people don't talk about it because it's just too ashame and sad just to think about it. It's a serious matter.
omg im literally so sad rn im crying while listening to sylvia bc i feel so bad for her she is sooooo brave leh
thank you for sharing this,, being 17 i was never taught this in my life
I was molested a few times before as well the first one was when I was sec 2? I was at the mrt and the space is so freaking big and this old man rubbed his arm on me and still fucking dare to turn around and smile, my teacher was BESIDE ME, I told her that man touched me and she just stood there and did nothing, when I got older I told my mom and she said "oh your teacher is just shocked and dont know what to do", another one is when I was 20 plus I was in the bus and his man sat beside me, his elbow rubbed onto my waist and he slowly moved his elbow and almost rubbed my breast, when he was about to, I punched his jaw hard and he flew off the seat
always looking forward to your podcasts! thanks for making our day!
Education is so important. School should teach students what they can do if something happen to them. Not only to females but to males too. Let the guys know how much a woman have to go through just to protect herself. Then there won’t be excuses for guys to say they don’t understand what the female goes through
I think girls should learn ways to protect themselves even in the simplest of ways. For me, whenever i go back home late at night, i would hold onto my keys and slide out the sharp part of it outwards. So if any guy were to suddenly attack me i would slash that guy’s neck. Haha i think it’s necessary to defend urself like that.
why does the title say "how to get away with a sex crime" why does it feels like a tutorial to get away
Did u watch the video
Because it is...
thanks for speaking up and educating us with this platform, really appreciate what you guys are doing. what about having these educational posters to be pasted on the walls of every single lift (okay maybe abit extreme but the idea is to be on the lift), since we do have scam poster around HDB blocks and lifts? we need the government to step in for this. the posters will serve as a 'reminder' for any possible convict to be more mindful before they even take the step to commit the crime.
I think it was right not to struggle in the lift, cos if he knows that ur going to report him, he might want to kill you to protect himself from getting caught.
I think when he presses up on you, you can say "Stop shall we continue in my house?" then when the lift door opens just run out of there and scream!! I think it will take some major acting skills. But worth it! at least it will stop it from becoming more
Hi! Thank you so much for sharing on how we can protect ourselves. This is life-changing for me. I would like to be part of the handbook making if you guys need help with design!
Yes I love this for homework and studying
every medical examination should actually guide you through the process!!!!!! i’ve got first aid cert before and the teacher told us it’s actually required to calm casualties down. i’m sure even in the medical community doctors are told to do that too
The fact that he's a doctor, his doctor license never get rejected?
i have been molested multiple times and the shame u feel is immeasurable. it’s not spoken about enough for guys and girl to know that u are not at the wrong
to any girls/boys out there, its actually quite standard procedure for doctors to put on gloves and explain to you what he is going to do and make you feel comfortable when he/she is performing such actions on you. and of course a chaperon has to always be there!
Actually I’ve been to polyclinics, GP, specialists several times to check on female health issues and 100% of the time the male Doctors will be accompanied by female Nurses or even counter staff. I thought this is standard procedure because Doctors will need to protect themselves too if there are any allegations against them. I’m shocked that such cases actually happen. Please request for female staff to be present when doing such checks.
*two uploads in a day thank the heavens*
Hmm what happened to slvyia. I believe tat cb td seem to be a pro. He completely let u feel off guard n slowly let u fall into his trap. 12 years ago so it hard to trace him. Well these kind of sicko mostly will repeat their act. If can maybe can approach e police n ask for recored of whether these 12 years got any td got convinced by law.. Etc he got a thing for long boot.. Or appeal for witness in td ( taxi driver) forums. Many td tend to be very proud n like to boost abt what ey do. Sorry maybe I dun made sense. I just feel shouldn't let this cb walk freely for what he done.
Thank u Sylvia for sharing
Watching for the 2nd time, didn't post this comment before, but I'm so down to make a handbook together for people!
This podcast really help people, have more podcast of these please!!:)
Its suprising to hear this is happening in SG. This is so wrong. Not so Disneyland afterall. I wonder how these trauma affect their view abt male, will they b haunted for life.
No.. its like even its fuck up.. if youre going to press charges on the person and it fail are u going to contuine? u know how much does it cost boi? fail liao still want throw money for your rights? is it really worth it? i lost $750 from being scammed and almost 1 year later police report also no reply..
sylvia n nina looks so cute in the thumbnail photo!🌈❤️
Hi tts, do you mind sharing what setup you guys are using for the podcast? :) thanks a lot in advance!
Actually, the doctors or the nurse have the professional duty to assure their patients on what they are doing.
I have got a suggestion for TTS - Sex education and consent education
Ladies, do make sure to ask for a female chaperon when being examined by a male doctor/ health professional.
I’m in! Your idea is worth building on.
to err on the safe side of caution, ask for a chaperone when you have a doctor of the opposite gender examining you
When molested, can victim hit the perpetrator? Will he/she get charged with battery? What will happen in this case if say, the perpetrator touched the bottoms, with her clothes still on?
And also... I'm interested in coming out with a handbook tgt
poor sylvia.... i pity her
I think some guys did not know how to respect women in general, they think touching is okay if they have past experience of encountering the girls who they can touch easily in those sleazy clubs.
I hate sex perverts, I really hate and very angry with the sex pervert who did that to Sylvia, he not only commit a crime, he also hurt Sylvia very deeply, Sylvia is my angel whom I love very much, I hate anybody who hurts Sylvia and show her no respect...😠
i think can ask aware to make the handbook together
WHO'S THIS EARLY?!
Always looking forward to TTS xD
bring an umbrella everywhere with you
Me seeing the thumbnail: SoCiAl DiStAnCe!!!!
OMG pls make a girls handbook!!!
@The Thirsty Sisters btw which alan walker song issit. Lol
I just love you guys😘😘
I was distracted by what you were saying cause I kept looking at Nina's pretty hair 🤣🤣 im sorry I just gotta say that
Good podcast for girls👍
@slyvia wats the alan walker song?XD
Hi
Wat about Eden ang case? Why was no action taken against him
Not much evidence allegedly
Firsg time u posted 2 times in a row
the doctor no money buy lubricant isit ?XD wtf saliva
y isit a male doc examine the lady shouldnt it be a female doc?!!!
Go see a Lady Doctor.
Early!!
MyPrettyPrincessSylvia, I enjoy listening to you and you are very pretty. 天天爱你。I love you everyday.
Wheeeeew
does no one else think that perhaps the lady n the dr alr had smth going on (think affair/rs) and she betrayed him by claiming he molested her? it's impossible for a dr to do what he did (ungloved hands/no chaperone etc) against professional standards unless he really gt carried away by his personal rs w this lady.
from the articles I have read, it seems like the lady has had no past experience going there other than the two cases she stated
@@user-er8dh9bg2p i read one that said she went to him, her regular doctor. sounds like she had consulted him a few times prior to that visit that 'went wrong'