One thing I forgot to mention: consent should never be automatically assumed, no matter the reason. Even once married, consent is still absolutely required. A wife is not 'always available' for her husband, for example. A partner, spouse or anyone else is always absolutely allowed to revoke consent, and consent must still be obtained and maintained during sex between anyone. Even if you are a sex-worker and someone has paid you for sexual services, you consent only to the specific acts discussed under those specific terms, and you have the right to revoke your consent at any time. Nobody is 'entitled' or 'owed' sex, sex shouldn't be bartered for with favours, promises, coercion, obligation, etc. Sex should only ever occur between people who wholeheartedly want to have sex in that moment.
Can we start a petition to have this played in every school and workplace across the globe as mandatory viewing? Possibly more than once? Just to be safe everyone gets the message. Thank you for making this. It’s really sad that we need videos like these to even make an attempt to get through to some people but I have hope that at least one person can learn something from this.
Agreed! Everyone should know about this from an early age, people of all genders and backgrounds. Society would be so much better if everyone understood and valued consent.
Holy shit, Rainy, can I *please* throw you a parade for specifically bringing up the issues with consent to sex vs consent to kink??? I see so much of this mentality getting peddled by really dangerous people trying to dom, and it's so frustrating to see vulnerable people taken advantage of. It's so good to hear somebody outright call this out!
Consent is just like making a cup of tea. If someone doesn’t like tea, or they just don’t feel like tea, you probably wouldn’t force them to drink the tea. So it should be the same with sex!! Great video! 👍
This video made realize I didn't consent to something. I got into a sexual situation and I tried telling him I didn't really want to do this but he just kept going. I needed to hear this video
I appreciate this cause I got hurt a few months ago while I was in a bad state of mind and hearing someone understand consent so clearly and kindly and not make it weird warms my ❤️!
TW: rape mention You’re making it so clear, that certain things that happened to me weren’t my fault and it’s good to know the difference between healthy consenting behavior and coercion/rape... as a victim of abuse, boundaries have always been hard/confusing for me and this discussion has made things crystal clear. Thank you for such an important audio.
I'm really, really glad to hear that this helps you a lot and clarifies things. It wasn't your fault. You may find this audio helpful too to understand the freeze response and how we respond to stressful/dangerous situations like trauma and abuse: ruclips.net/video/UHAfuaoa6Vg/видео.html
Tw! Hearing this so clearly laid out makes me realize that my consent didn't matter when I had my first time since I was convinced, or pressured, into it. I always thought that because I said "yes" in the end it meant that what happened wasn't as bad as I made it out to be.. but it was. I just now realized that.
As a 1st year med student, our professors are heavily emphasizing about consent to us. It's very important that the patient is clear headed and can think for themselves. Or else the responsibility of the consent can fall into the hands of their family or guardian. It's called the principle of autonomy in medical ethics. We can never force a patient to undergo a procedure if they don't want to. Even if we really want to help treat them, if they say no then we don't have a say in the matter. Even during medical examinations, like as simple as cranial nerve examinations we have to inform patient what we're going to do to them and ask if they consent. Consent is especially important when it comes to research studies. Before, participants or volunteers doesn't have any form of consent or say which makes them vulnerable to risk and harm. But even since then, the research committee made sure that each participant is fully aware of the experiment, is aware of the risk and benefits, and is on the right mind to consent to the research. The research study also needs to be approved by the committee handling the welfare of the participants because if there's a single thing that could indicate that the participant could be harmed, then the research study will be completely revised or not approved. There's also an investigative personnel that will check on the participants if they're doing well. This audio is really good and informative. So overall, consent is really, really important. You have a really good voice and I think it fits you to do podcasting.
I haven't watched this yet since I sadly don't have the time, but I just wanted to say that I really appreciate the detailed descriptions that you put under every audio. Thank you very much!
This was wonderful. I’ve always thought I’ve known a lot (or enough to understand about consent and enough to be able to consent) about sex (and likewise), but this was really eye opening in more than one respect. Thank you
As some other people already said: this has to be teached in schools and in society in general, beginning as early as possible. I mean, a society can't work without consent, no matter in what form or situation. And I'm really glad that you talk about it and make it very clear. I find myself agreeing to things I actually don't want to do very often, which is sad, because I think that in some people's minds this has become an almost "normal" thing, or something that they maybe even expect others to do. So thank you for sharing your knowledge with others and help them learn about something new, or make them feel understanded, in a very calm and easy way.
A really educational, thorough and important video. Thank you Rainy. Perhaps you could send this to the current Australian govt so they can replace their disasterous "milkshake" consent video.
Thank you for this. I didn't know that this applies to a lot of things in my life. Expectations that I just accepted co'z I'm afraid of rejection. This helped me a lot.
You probably won’t respond because this video was uploaded a while ago but I had an experience a few weeks ago with a guy. I consented to the activity & even in the middle of it he stopped & asked if I was still okay & I said yes but I really wasn’t. I didn’t feel pressured by him at all, he was very kind & understanding. I just felt like I couldn’t say no & idk why
Probably a lot of societal pressure that you've grown up with. And a fear of being rejected, hurt or deemed unattractive if you do speak up and ask to stop. A lot of people feel that way. Consent is about more than just asking, it's also about making an environment where people feel safe to speak truthfully.
If you take me to a movie you know I won't like you're automatically consenting to the possibility of my snarky commentary for its duration, I'm sorry (not actually sorry). 😂
![[A] Be Kind To Yourself (self-worth issues)](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/fruckSoIDRA/mqdefault.jpg)
![[A] Be Kind To Yourself (self-worth issues)](/img/tr.png)
![[A] What Feelings Are For (educational ramble about emotions)](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/9rQf-hsRTM8/mqdefault.jpg)
![[A] Not Making The Wrong Decision (thought adjustment & reality check)](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/nogat0TgA9I/mqdefault.jpg)
One thing I forgot to mention: consent should never be automatically assumed, no matter the reason. Even once married, consent is still absolutely required. A wife is not 'always available' for her husband, for example. A partner, spouse or anyone else is always absolutely allowed to revoke consent, and consent must still be obtained and maintained during sex between anyone. Even if you are a sex-worker and someone has paid you for sexual services, you consent only to the specific acts discussed under those specific terms, and you have the right to revoke your consent at any time. Nobody is 'entitled' or 'owed' sex, sex shouldn't be bartered for with favours, promises, coercion, obligation, etc. Sex should only ever occur between people who wholeheartedly want to have sex in that moment.
Rainy Day Audios thank you for adding this part, and making this video in general. It’s very much appreciated 💙💙
Can we start a petition to have this played in every school and workplace across the globe as mandatory viewing? Possibly more than once? Just to be safe everyone gets the message. Thank you for making this. It’s really sad that we need videos like these to even make an attempt to get through to some people but I have hope that at least one person can learn something from this.
I'd like schools to teach children this because it is soooooo important
Agreed! Everyone should know about this from an early age, people of all genders and backgrounds. Society would be so much better if everyone understood and valued consent.
Education is fun as long as rainy is the teacher ❤❤
Even my school doesn’t teach us this. Thank you.
Holy shit, Rainy, can I *please* throw you a parade for specifically bringing up the issues with consent to sex vs consent to kink??? I see so much of this mentality getting peddled by really dangerous people trying to dom, and it's so frustrating to see vulnerable people taken advantage of. It's so good to hear somebody outright call this out!
Consent is just like making a cup of tea. If someone doesn’t like tea, or they just don’t feel like tea, you probably wouldn’t force them to drink the tea. So it should be the same with sex!!
Great video! 👍
This video made realize I didn't consent to something. I got into a sexual situation and I tried telling him I didn't really want to do this but he just kept going. I needed to hear this video
I appreciate this cause I got hurt a few months ago while I was in a bad state of mind and hearing someone understand consent so clearly and kindly and not make it weird warms my ❤️!
TW: rape mention
You’re making it so clear, that certain things that happened to me weren’t my fault and it’s good to know the difference between healthy consenting behavior and coercion/rape... as a victim of abuse, boundaries have always been hard/confusing for me and this discussion has made things crystal clear. Thank you for such an important audio.
I'm really, really glad to hear that this helps you a lot and clarifies things. It wasn't your fault. You may find this audio helpful too to understand the freeze response and how we respond to stressful/dangerous situations like trauma and abuse: ruclips.net/video/UHAfuaoa6Vg/видео.html
The world, unfortunately, needs more of these
Tw!
Hearing this so clearly laid out makes me realize that my consent didn't matter when I had my first time since I was convinced, or pressured, into it. I always thought that because I said "yes" in the end it meant that what happened wasn't as bad as I made it out to be.. but it was. I just now realized that.
As a 1st year med student, our professors are heavily emphasizing about consent to us. It's very important that the patient is clear headed and can think for themselves. Or else the responsibility of the consent can fall into the hands of their family or guardian. It's called the principle of autonomy in medical ethics. We can never force a patient to undergo a procedure if they don't want to. Even if we really want to help treat them, if they say no then we don't have a say in the matter. Even during medical examinations, like as simple as cranial nerve examinations we have to inform patient what we're going to do to them and ask if they consent.
Consent is especially important when it comes to research studies. Before, participants or volunteers doesn't have any form of consent or say which makes them vulnerable to risk and harm. But even since then, the research committee made sure that each participant is fully aware of the experiment, is aware of the risk and benefits, and is on the right mind to consent to the research. The research study also needs to be approved by the committee handling the welfare of the participants because if there's a single thing that could indicate that the participant could be harmed, then the research study will be completely revised or not approved. There's also an investigative personnel that will check on the participants if they're doing well.
This audio is really good and informative. So overall, consent is really, really important. You have a really good voice and I think it fits you to do podcasting.
I haven't watched this yet since I sadly don't have the time, but I just wanted to say that I really appreciate the detailed descriptions that you put under every audio. Thank you very much!
This was wonderful. I’ve always thought I’ve known a lot (or enough to understand about consent and enough to be able to consent) about sex (and likewise), but this was really eye opening in more than one respect.
Thank you
As some other people already said: this has to be teached in schools and in society in general, beginning as early as possible. I mean, a society can't work without consent, no matter in what form or situation. And I'm really glad that you talk about it and make it very clear. I find myself agreeing to things I actually don't want to do very often, which is sad, because I think that in some people's minds this has become an almost "normal" thing, or something that they maybe even expect others to do. So thank you for sharing your knowledge with others and help them learn about something new, or make them feel understanded, in a very calm and easy way.
This is such an important conversation!
this was so profound and endearingly explained. thank you so much x
A really educational, thorough and important video. Thank you Rainy.
Perhaps you could send this to the current Australian govt so they can replace their disasterous "milkshake" consent video.
Thank you for this. I didn't know that this applies to a lot of things in my life. Expectations that I just accepted co'z I'm afraid of rejection. This helped me a lot.
Thank you for making this video. I never even thought about this, but it's so important!
And btw. I love being called a little raincloud 😊💚
Man, I love your audios ❤️
You probably won’t respond because this video was uploaded a while ago but I had an experience a few weeks ago with a guy. I consented to the activity & even in the middle of it he stopped & asked if I was still okay & I said yes but I really wasn’t. I didn’t feel pressured by him at all, he was very kind & understanding. I just felt like I couldn’t say no & idk why
Probably a lot of societal pressure that you've grown up with. And a fear of being rejected, hurt or deemed unattractive if you do speak up and ask to stop. A lot of people feel that way. Consent is about more than just asking, it's also about making an environment where people feel safe to speak truthfully.
I love this so much❤️❤️❤️❤️
I’m crying
Thank you so much
If you take me to a movie you know I won't like you're automatically consenting to the possibility of my snarky commentary for its duration, I'm sorry (not actually sorry). 😂
No, that's not how it works. There is no such thing as automatic consent.
@@rainydayaudios7754 Of course, I agree. Was only a joke, I promise.