Clarke - things I never said [part 1]

this is the first part of my trilogy devoted to Lexa.
Part 1 is about Clarke and how she feels after losing her.
Part 2 will be a tribute to Lexa.
Part 3 will be a tender take on Clexa.
What can I say after 3x07... Lexa deserved better.
Clarke deserved better. WE deserved better.
---
song Dirty Little Secret by Sarah McLachlan
I know it kinnda ended weirdly but the lyrics quickly change... : '
Here are the lyrics:
"Dirty Little Secret"
If I had the chance, love
I would not hesitate
To tell you all the things I never said before
Don't tell me it's too late
[Chorus:]
Cause I've relied on my illusions
To keep me warm at night
But I denied in my capacity to love
I am willing, to give up this fight
I've been up all night drinking
To drown my sorrow down
Nothing seems to help me since you went away
I'm so tired of this town
(...)
There's nothing to be gained from this
But disaster..