Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it still men in general that ask women to marry them? Asking women why they’re not married is like asking someone on a job hunt why the companies that interviewed them didn’t hire them. You need to ask the interviewer what it is about the interviewee that made them decide not to hire them. Ask the men they’ve dated why they didn’t marry them. And men aren’t “intimidated” by successful women. But just like women complain about men that talk ad nauseam about work and their job, the successful woman can sometimes make her whole identity about her career. No man wants to feel like he’s talking to a colleague at work when he’s with his woman.
thank you this. hahah. I said the same thing when they asked the men to be quiet! I was thinking "but they're the *very people* you need to be asking!"😅
Black women, unlike other ethnic groups of women, don't know what being a submissive wife, motherly like woman is. Most Black women were raised to be dominate, strong independent sistas.
I keep hearing the word, “intimidated” Why? Average income for black males= $47,000.00 Average income for black females = $38,000.00 Marriage rate of black males = 29% Marriage rate of black females = 26% Black women are 53% more educated, yet have the highest student loan debt of all races. Yet, still have a medium income that is less, than the black men they are more educated over. 51% of all black males are single and childless. Key Word: Beguile
yeah this whole "intimidated" shit lol no man is intimidated by a woman (on average) At all. She can be a 10/10 making twice what i make and shes still a mf woman?!
Kevin Samuels tried to give them tips to get married but the females didn’t listen to him now look at it. Feminism has prevented them from getting married
@@carmeld45 So tired of women exaggerating exceptions while trying to victimize themselves. 54% of BM do not have kids & 61% are in the middle class. 97% of BM are NOT incarcerated & have had no contact with the criminal justice system. Ma'am are you giving any of these women advice on how to stop making excuses for their poor choices in men when the majority of men (and not the exceptions) would make more suitable options?
BM like feminine women and BW are too masculine for straight BM to be attracted to them thats why there is a lot of leftover BW who are not married because men of other groups also like feminine women.
@@rosejames5172 they were probably raised by a masculine single mother BW and that made them attracted to masculinity looking at their mother's masculinity.
Interesting discussion. I've noticed that all the Highly successful black men in my network are married to other ethnic groups, for example Arab, Turkish, White English and Asian women. The 3 qualities that I often hear why these affluent black men married their partners is due to them being 1) Very feminine, 2) Being non materialistic and 3) Being supportive.
@akinrojugbokan2339 I wouldn't say it's based on ethnic group, I think those men simply found women in other ethnic groups that had the basic character traits that was required for long term marriage. The main one is not being materialistic, their wives are always happy to go to simple places to dine and always try to not spend a lot even though they could. For example, my partner is Polish and she had traditional qualities and is not materialistic and I still spoil her.
It’s so weird when women say men are intimidated by them because they are successful when men generally don’t care about how successful you are when we are choosing for a relationship.
Why is there a panel of Africans speaking for all black women I’m not African. I’m Black American. They need just speak for them and their culture. There is no black American on that panel leave us out of your conversation.
Ebony is Black American, so her talking points were from a black American perspective. The other ladies on the panel were speaking from an African American perspective.
You say that but all the men go for other women with that same hair though. If you’re not a part of the solution you are a part of the problem. Maybe if more blk men chose to date sistas with their natural hair then many more blk woman would wear their natural hair. Simple.
@@morethanrubiesministries2593 You do know a woman is not to preach in church, don't you?? Read Timothy 2:12🤔it's not only the hair, but also the, I don't need a man/I'm a boss bytch!! Who wants a bytch for a wife?? girl bye.
Why do black women online speak as though they are all making 7 figures or more, you'll see teachers on here talking about not finding anyone on their level 😂
Right. They be online acting like it’s all phds and entrepreneurs. But what about the sista that works at Walmart or Target? That’s actually the majority
Good point, that also explains why they are some of the most egotistical people you'll ever come across...my goodness. You'll see a barely stable BW talking about she can't find a BM "on her level" 😂 whatever that means
I finally understand why some folks hate fresh and fit. This show was this same but with the genders reversed where the hosts brought a bunch of beta losers that couldn't articulate themselves to save their lives.
Many of the women who say "in African culture you're taught to focus on school and then you're career" but be in five relationships by 25... So I need to ask, why do we pretend as if the issue isn't us rather than what we're taught (and subsequently don't apply to ourselves anyway)
Too much blame is being thrown out its crazy....nobody wants to take accountability for their action and choices, if you want to be married by 20, you'll be married by 20. We all chose not to get married, whether its because of financial or culture.. and the put down of black men is crazy, if you're attracting men that feel intimidated by your suceess, or insecure, or have feminine energy..... then the issue isn't the men, the issue is you.
@@SahraBenji lol.....I'm just sayin...😅😅... nobody said i'm not married because i don't want to be marrier" or "i had a chance to marry...but i fuccced it up"
The female panelists kept saying how white men marry early and how they're marrying all these black women.......if this is all true.....why isn't she married then? Why hasn't one of these non-black men married her?
They WORSHIP white men! Yet marriage rates are declining ACROSS the board for all racial groups! This is why black men with options should go overseas and find real black women that respect themselves and don’t worship whites!
@@rosejames5172young modern person who does not know history from creation thru JESUS. Marriage is a covenant and GOD establish the natural order. These woman are pissed because you are being excluded from the 1% of man. Savannah James proves you wrong. None of you are eligible.
Ain’t no Black American Brotha is intimidated by a Black Woman who makes more lmao. Y’all sound crazy these are African Tether Woman must be something in the water in Africa. Don’t compare Black American Men to African Men, Black American Men we built different period 💯
6:00 she made a great point......i don't think we look at forever, we're in the age of RIGHT NOW....the minute you don't make me happy slightly its on to the next and then the cycle continues. There's a crazy expectations on both men and woman...due greatly to social media, and we always think the grass is better on the other side.
I grew up with successful Black men and women who are all still married and had successful marriages. The WM many of our women end up with are below average to average at best. BM still are more financially successful than BW. However average is good on WM but, bad on BM. Here are some points to think about. 1.) For women, the things that make you successful in the workplace will negatively affect femininity in some way. 2.) You must find balance based upon common goals as a union and RESPECT. Where a woman does not respect a man, a relationship can not exist. 3.) BW often overlook the fact they idolize WM with as much vigor as they claim your average male celebrity/athlete does. It's a lot deeper than I want to explain in the interest of keeping this long post short as possible. 4.) Gender roles have not adapted to the modern reality of men and women as well as the wildly different economy than 50 years ago. A wealthy man never expects his wife to build him up but, wealthy women expect their suitors to fullfill traditional roles. In today's world hisnamd and wife have to work in 90% of unions. 5.) Get off SM. Keeping up with the Jones's is real poison. People think marriage is all exotic trips, expensive food and excitement. Marriage is work, commitment, bordem, compromise and baby making.
I don’t think so they done well because it’s raw and authentic. Them people married are gonna start capping about their relationship especially those in 5/10 into their relationship. We don’t need that
This is a really interesting topic. First of all it appears that a lot of young people today are approaching relationships and marriage from a consumer point of view. The men and the women are saying things like what can you do for me!? What do you have to offer me? A lot of these conversations are me centered. I understand the potential thing ;I get it. A lot of people have been burned by that potential thing. All of you ladies have to understand that most men don't come into their own until they're in their thirties so it's better to build with them along the way if they are productive. They may not be where you want them to be at the moment but if you play the long game and they are productive, you will reap the benefits. My wife did that with me we had our ups and downs but 27 years later we're living a prosperous life . Don't be in a hurry to gain things or material wealth . Enjoy the journey with your spouse and build methodically along the way.
You guys didn't give the men a chance land their points, so im looking forward to the next episode and make sure that the men out number the women...I suggest if the ladies of Sosa can bring in someone with a different perspective someone like Garang from previous episodes it be great. I think social media mostly oversize issues and misguide us into generalization of issues. Having said that (Personal opinion) I think in general men can and will date any woman and the amount of money she makes doesn't matter because he's still gonna provide and lead. but for women its a different because women in general tend to date men who make the same amount of money or higher. God created all of us uniquely different for a reason, i think its because we are supposed to look around for our match and grow together. i loved this episode and i think the ladies did a great job giving their own perspectives and experiences especially Janet OUR ACHOLI GIRL!, she was on point..shout out to everyone on the panel keep up the great work, WE LOVE YOU & WE ARE PROUD OF YOU GUYS
I want to say this with respect and don’t mean to put any of my black sisters down. I’m only talking about ONE THING and ONE THING ONLY! The hair… I think many black men are now looking for the real thing…. Example, the wigs and hairstyles all these women in this video have is NOT sexy to many black men. I say, wear whatever you want to wear but don’t let that thing completely change how you really look. Question, if these ladies take off their wigs or weaves, how do they look? Many men have been deceived for a long time by not knowing who they are dealing with until they see the real deal, their women with no wigs or weaves or any other body attachments. Sometimes, the wigs and weaves initially get the man to talk to you but they usually don’t keep the man. Many men like to know who they are dealing with from the beginning. For men with women, what we see is NOT what we get. So to these ladies, start by showing the world your real look. Wear your natural hair or wigs and weaves that do not completely change how you really look. In this video, many men can’t really tell how you look. The wigs / weaves are out of control. This is one of the reasons black men are doing whatever you are talking about….
I’m gonna agree with this because honestly I’m a woman who is natural but will wear wigs weaves braids etc. black women. You will be surprised at the attention you get from MEN not just black once you wear your own hair.
As a part time photographer I share the same views as soundsofdefinition . I’ve witnessed the reaction of black women when asked to remove the wig or weave and you’ll see where they live; ask most black women to remove their weave or wig their lost without the false confidence. I’m not here to demean anyone but I’ve seen this reaction on multiple occasions. It’s been my experience in witnessing black women that wear weave feel inferior to other races that wear their natural hair and shake their hair in different settings. I also feel that black women are the last to be desired for marriage because they were coached into believing they did not need a man for success nor did they need a man for their household and so on.
Black men are wayyyy more gentle with non black women. I have witnessed it most of my adult life. We literally get the worst of them then they move on and do better. Just crazy. 🥺
False. Femininity is not determined by race & when a woman possesses and exudes an abundance of it & it's authentic then THAT's what the man is attracted to - not her race.
Not true, bm men statistically don't marry them either and they have a higher chance of becoming single baby mothers. So it may appear that they treat them better but statistically they don't.
I think the main disparity is due to cultural values and the way we operate in the world. As it was mentioned, other races are taught to date for marriage in college and look for providers. In our community, we have high single mother rates and aren’t taught to value marriage. The men don’t have role models anymore either so they don’t even know what it means to protect and provide so they look for women to “help” them build instead of building by themselves. Also, watching their mothers do everything is pushing the narrative that black women are independent and are good enough to struggle with. Both are to blame as to why the culture is in a highly dysfunctional with values and decline in marriage. I also agree that black women have stepped up economically and the men are behind which is causing an imbalance so we have to seek mates from other races the more successful we become. In today’s society, black people are their own worst enemies right now. I’m not sure how long it will take to fix the dysfunctions but starting with changing the values and requiring marriage over being a man’s baby mama is a start!
In fairness I don't think we can discuss Black relationships in America without considering the various disruptions to healthy, functional relationships. It's difficult to fully put the onus on Black men or women without historical context. Our relationships have never been encouraged, except for breeding during a particular time period. Now it's discouraged due to the decline in the Caucasians birth rate, along with the threat of Blackness. Not controlling social/economic institutions or information dissemination puts us at a disadvantage.
Nothing interesting about what they said! Most of them come from single mom households and were not raised to be or are qualified to be wives. You follow their stupidity and reject your own culture you will end up just as bad if not worse than then!
@@andrejamison2723That's 💯, unfortunately, women look at things from their perspective only. Women don't listening to men only The State,The Church, their jobs, and The Media
Ladies, you are missing the mark. Most women on the panel only spoke about material, wealth, and career. One woman briefly brought up religion. I'd like to hear the ladies factor religion or christian values into their decision making and choosing a proper mate.
The part of this conversation that is not talked about enough the the way some men/boys are coddle and are not condition to want marriage at all to a certain extent, and how women/girls are told to wait for a that was never socially conditioned to want marriage at an early age (20-35) because of hookup culture. BM (in America) also forget that THEY are the ones that are supposed to propose, not the other way around. And if you look at the history of marriage and why is began, IT ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH BUSINESS & MONEY.
If 61% of BW have children (59% of that number by multiple men) while only 46% of BM have children, which gender has been coddled & which gender is most responsible for hookup culture? If BM out-earn BW, which gender has been coddled? If BM according to the CDC are the most involved fathers in the lives of their children in the country, which gender has been coddled? If 33% of BM are married & 85% of the time it's to a BW while 26% of BW are married & 93% of the time it's to a BM, which gender has been coddled? If BM are married to WW at an 8% rate & BW are married to WM at a 4% rate, which gender has been coddled? If 39% of BM & 61% of BW identify as LGBT, which gender has been coddled? If 97% of BM are NOT incarcerated-54% do NOT have children-and 61% of BM are in the middle class-all majorities-then "coddled" is NOT a description that applies to a majority of BM as those men are highly productive & are leading their communities.
@@r2d187 that’s the point dummy, especially BW in older generations that were a mother in a two parent household STILL coddled Black male children while daughter are indoctrinated in to servitude from birth. Every household is different, but the children of old and new are now telling their truth and their true experiences in their own family dynamics because they are know given a chance to be heard. BW for that past 10 years stories are just now being listened too on a large scale and BM especially are liking that BW are pushing back in the toxicity that the black community, toxic black men, and toxic black mammies/women caused.
@@r2d187 a black men ain’t their most involved father and that was not a stat from the CDC, it was a SELF-Reported study and samples a small portion of men which is not the most accurate representation of America and anecdotal evidence will 1000% otherwise
I’m confused do these women wanna marry a man or a women??? Why do y’all not wanna hear what the man had to say y’all could learn alot instead yall cutting him off and saying y’all don’t want his input
Just an observation, but I heard these ladies bemoan the lack of masculine, traditional men yet the entire exchange they didn’t want to hear the young men on the panel give their experience and input while at the same time talking about the types of relationships they want, which are the opposite of traditional. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a partnership, but I’m afraid the types of men who want the types of relationships these ladies want, they would deem too feminine. You seem to want a gangsta/stock broker/gay/abusive dude which just doesn’t exist. I really wish you all the best of luck, but I just don’t think you have any idea what you want.
Wasted 10 mins of my time , I’ll never get back ……… why ask a question as to why men don’t want to marry black women …. Then not allow the very same men to answer that question ….. ? Grab your passports gents
Another podcast discussing the lost value system. Ladies, just like you believe in the motto of my body my choice. Men follow the mantra, my wife my choice. If you don’t give us what we desire you won’t become our wife.
@@PhDiva02this narrative doesn’t work anymore. 61% of black men are in the middle class. Black men earn more on average than black women. The majority of black men are childless meaning we are able to save more of our income. Why create a straw man argument about black men not having money when the majority do?
Around the 50:00 to 55:00 mark, the ladies kept saying if a woman goes through X,Y and Z, there's no guarantee she'll get a ring which is true, but that's not the ideal way to look at it because nothing in life is a 100% guarantee, outside of death of course. The best you can (and should) do is work to improve your chances. Just like if your trying to get to a certain collage or applying for a particular job, women have to use a similar mindset if they seek marriage.
[**in the western world**] 1) Choices "Life is a matter of choices and every choice you make, makes you." [John C Maxwell] 2) High standard of living in the western world: Marriage is increasingly becoming more of a luxury than a necessity (e.g., Mr. and Miss Independent). Historically, marriage was the primary means of survival for women but that is no longer the case in the western world (e.g., section 8 housing, food stamps, Obamacare, free public schools). 3) Cultural values "You are basically saying that the most successful of us can never find the right relationship unless it is with a white counterpart...." @Ammanuel. For the most part, Africans gain a LOT when we move to the west (e.g., education, jobs, businesses, partnerships). However, at what COST? Is there a cost to living in a European centered environment as an African? Does it cause us to think or act in ways that are inherently foreign to us to survive (e.g., “preferring” what is not us)? 4) Antiblackness The narrative in the western world is that everything “black” is negative and criminal. Instead of society celebrating the professional success of black men and women, they have found a way to make it negative (e.g., college degrees/professional success/personal development = a lack of marriages). STAY WOKE! Excellent job, Ladies of Sosa and ALL of the panel members! Peace, love, and light Your Nigerian sister
Most of what you said has truth in in except the anti-blackness part. Nigerian men in particular do extremely well in the USA. I believe that Nigerian men get 25% (out of the amount of black men that attend college in USA) of the best paying college educated jobs, and there are not that many in the USA. Nigerians have been brought up with strict discipline unlike Americans. Most men in the USA and western countries are starved for feminine women and will jump at the chance to get a feminine woman. Feminine women are nearly impossible to find in western countries.
When I saw the panel set up, I was like Ebony seems like among the top 2 that I can date. But when she spoke...I realised she said some of the dumbest things I have heard. 1. Her take on forever. If forever is to be negotiated upon as you go, like do you know what marriage is? I have never met a single lady (from any race) who if given the chance to be with the love of her life forever - that she will question that. And if she is saying marriage doesn't interest her...then she was a wrong guest for the topic being discussed. Marriage worries you guys (as it should) and that is why it's a topic. 2. That black women are the most successful they have been. Well, it depends on what success is to you & what metrics you use in measuring it. Yes! Education wise, women, black women to be precise are more educated (which is good for us all) & career progression...all good! But let me bring the plane to a landing, if black women are becoming this awesome how come the statistics still say they the least race to get married? Okay let's go with the agenda that black men are so scared of the success of black women...how come White men are not flocking to marry y'all? Black men are not making enough, are not good enough...how come black men is the race that marry more among other races? How come women of other races want to marry black men? (The other lady whose boyfriend ended up with a white lady need to ask herself what did she did wrong. Clearly, she found him good enough to marry...cause she sounded lowkey disappointed..so the issue perhaps, couldn't be with the guy. She seems like a sweet girl though esp her take on forever- beautiful! Wish her well) My point in finality? Why are black women not getting married? It goes back to the family unit, as a black man..I will blame us men for that failure - the absence of fathers in the home is the cause. Asians (Chinese in particular) have the least divorce rate & we see how that translate to their kids doing well, low crime involvement, strong family bond and all of that. So black fathers need to stick with their families...be that strong moral compass...train your kids well, give them a mirror of what marriage is. And young black ladies stop saying cause you have financial success you don't need a man. How many women will trade having a loving husband, kids to career success? How many? Tell me. Marriage is good! God almighty created it. America lost God & we are seeing where is it (🇺🇸) descending to now. Peace ✌🏿🖤 (For sure! The longest comment I have written on any social media platform)
To say why other men aren’t flocking to black women. I’ll say this as a BW. We don’t flock to other races of men that’s thee answer You should know. We turn them down I see it everyday. In NYC very gentrified and WM and others are interested they feel they have no chance so some don’t even try. We’re least married by BM because black men do not marry!!!! they rarely want to settle down or do it late in life. They marry out often because well most BM that date out do have serious self hate and suffer us BW thru colorism etc. If Bw want marriage they have to date out and expand those options. Plenty BM are just not ready on so many levels. BM number one online crying about everything concerning BW we have to date out and date BM that got it together.
Dont blame us men for Fathers not being in the home. Its a misinterpretation of the facts. To assume that men chose not to be in the home is just that. An assumption. By the early 1960s Black men were in the home at >80% in America. What happened? The Pill, Feminism, Welfare, the Sexual Revolution and the genesis of virulent anti BM Feminism were choices made by BW in America. BM in America couldn't defend against the onslaught as a disenfranchised, demonized minority >100 yrs up from Slavery and just out of Jim Crow. If African men dont learn the lessons the same can happen in Africa once the social engineering gains traction
Great points - until the part about blaming black men. Black women aren't getting married because they are over-sexualized & value sexual promiscuity over being in a cooperative relationship with a stable & consistent man. They value freedom to have as many sexual partners & baby showers as they want over saving themselves for one good man. Fathers & grandfathers have been speaking on this for generations but no one has cared to listen. But the data doesn't lie - The problem is not the men because Black men are more married than black women are despite being outnumbered by black women by more than 500K.
Well if anyone needed the answer to why black women are least likely to get married, just listen to them speak amongst themselves in this podcast, The affirmation of delusions, the speaking over the men, the implicit denial of contrary points was telling! This podcast said more to this phenomenon than i think even they expected.
It's Not about Money It's About RESPECT Intelligent GODLINESS Faithful Lifestyle Proverbs 31:1-31 DECENT Cloth yourselves with GODLINESS TRUTH Wisdom knowledge
If you aim for a failed marriage you’ll never miss. Yes, people grow but that’s why it’s important to find someone with the same core values because you’ll grow toward the same common goals. This is not to say you’re guaranteed success but the difference in likelihood of your marriage lasting is significant. ALSO why would you bring children into a pre-determined broken family. They’re now put in a worse position.
“Women shouldn’t have to audition for marriage” What do y’all think the point of dating and getting into a relationship is? You’re both auditioning for marriage. So act accordingly.
I’m a 49 y/o black man. I was a full time single parent with my youngest being a girl. I have a sister in her late 50s not married and a niece in her mid 30s. Neither has children. Men are not intimidated by successful women and men are not “choosing” white women. Men are open to finding compatibility and someone supportive, understanding and the least amount of drama. Most of the time it’s proximity, whether it’s school, work, the gym. We like natural beauty, feminine energy and compromise. The men you ladies are picking that are feminine, you picked. He was more than likely raised by a woman. Men also don’t compete to make a certain amount of money. We want to be happy with our work. We value experience over education. We are not intimidated by women making more money. Ladies keep giving other ladies advice and every time one of the men speak, they get shamed and insulted for their views. I can’t pay for all the bills, while you keep all your money. That’s not fair.
The guy with the glasses adds nothing to the conversation… ever lol. Every conversation is “what about men”, “what about men.” But at the sametime, he will back up on what he says to fit any and every narrative when he gets push back. It’s extremely hard to have a conversation with someone like that. I think he’s a little insecure about his career/education, so he can’t see outside of himself. I wonder what some of the other men would have said if they were up there …. they seem to have better careers. No woman is worried about “losing” a man that has nothing. Yes, Asian… white and hispanic men and women will build together AND they don’t leave the women they build with for the most part. In general, black men will leave the black women he built with because he starts to believe he’s “better” then her or starts to go for the women that never looked at him when he had nothing.
80% of black men are married to black women. Spreading a false narrative that black men leave their women is inaccurate. Especially because women file for divorce nearly 70% of the time. Men have more to lose leaving their wives. Women have more to gain leaving their husbands.
Relationships/marriages are ended by women 80% of the time & if the woman is highly educated they tend to leave 90% of the time. The reasons you described for why men leave is incorrect & has always been associated with why a woman leaves a man after SHE levels up. Men leaving relationships is an extremely rare occurrence. For example, how many times has a man broken up with you compared to how many times YOU broke up with a man? Case closed.
Its a new age, I don't like that marriage is pushed on women before age 25. Also, I don't like that society looks down on women who are not married by age 25. I think women should be taught to get themselves together, be happy, travel, make friends, work on themselves. Do all of that before marriage.
If we appreciated marriage and families more than anything else, especially in the AA community. Things would turn around. We'd rather see the basketball court than the reverend's court. I'd also love to see more African/AA unions as well to keep our people growing.
These privileged ladies on the panel ignore their ancestral history with all the struggle and sacrifices made for the good of the Family. These woman really think GOD is not going to provide the response to them.
Ladies, you looked over a very important point. We have none traditional women looking for traditional relationships. That will never work because the mentally does not match. Plus men in general are not intimidated by your success. Most women not matter what level their at are looking for high level men. But most of you are not attracting those men for relationships. You get what you are attracting.
Preferring a group of men who marry the least (black men, 29%) will result in you decreasing your odds of getting married it’s not rocket science. Black women that date out are more likely to get married and do.
No they don't all u have to do is research the numbers are in BM marry at a much higher rate than bw also interracial the number us even higher so what exactly are u talking about ???
Black men marry the least out of all races of men. 29% of black men marry that is a low number which affects black women. Now that black women are dating out more and are dating men who statistically marry at much higher rates black women’s marriage rates will increase.@@Dakingalbert2
Exactly. My mother is dating a Mexican man and he proposed less than a year too. Black men rarely marry anyone. They make everyone a babymama. Everyone knows that.@@MsLotusBlooms
@@MsLotusBlooms I am not talking about integration or interracial marriage. Before the 1960s marriage rates of black women were very high.They were married to black men.
When she says men get intimidated and exude feminine energy... Around successful women. They say things like What's up "Big Money" or When you gone take me out? Because they see she works hard for her success. Men that are looking for handouts, will always be intimidated, by hard working women.
The black men that they should/want to marry are not intimidated by a woman who makes money. That is a cop out. It's the pookies and ray-rays that women like dealing with that are insecure... But of course the narrative is that the black men that have made something of themselves and make good money are intimidated by a woman doing the same makes no damn sense.
I'm not sure what it's like where you guys live but I'm not trying to get with someone poor. I'm looking for combine incomes in order to get a better loan from the bank for a mortgage.
These black women at the start only proved the point of the problem of black women in the beginning of the video. The combativeness and the overtalking other people ( the men on the podcast) and blaming their inability to have the good relationships on men is ironic. Their pin the ways women behave emotionally and say that men should behave that way as well. Who relegated women to be the legislators of what is deemed an ideal way to behave that is narcissistic in its nature and being. Women should not be trashing men in this way the same way that men accept women’s behaviours and ideals ( tall rich handsome ext). It is insane how far women have become brainwashed to think men and women are the same and that men should think more like women. I miss the good old days, when black families were together and people understood and accepted their differences. Before y’all get mad I’ll use the race and gender card too. This is coming from a black women too, I see this shit close to home and in my community the most.
I’m African but man I used to admired how black American relationships used to be in the 50s and 60s ,it was very similar to how African relationships are ,black Americans during those times used to value marriage a lot ,during that time black pepper were United even if they were going through segregation,racism and discrimination,they were doing better than now,traditional values were still existing and there was no hate between black men and women in the US ,now it is upside down, marriage is treated like a joke ,people want the perfect men or women when in marriage no one is going to be perfect as relationships will have their ups and downs moments ,people love demand stuff and want unrealistic relationships,also the promotion of baby mamas ,single motherhood ,being naked in media and everything has changed the black American culture to the point where a lot of African don’t want to be a part of sadly ,that’s where a lot of disagreement between African and black American comes from I believe,I honestly wished that the families vales that people in the 60s had and the Union of the black community in America would eventually come black ,because during those times we have witness some of the most influential black American people in history because black American community were United .
It's a multifaceted problem that isn't changeable for blacks. But it's the combination of american bw not wanting marriage (my sister falls into this category); having better employment and educational opportunities; bm and men in general preferring other races; being savvy and skilled enough to survive without it.
@@kylechaplain8073Your response is a case and point of why single women are happier. Easily triggered, misogynoiristic, and really really bad logic. No one wants to deal with that day in and day out.
One thing I've noticed on this panel. AA OR Motherland everyone on that panel is a chocolate Black person. Yet we act miles away mentally. That's the sad part.
so they basically told the men to shut up. 😂 women stay talking to each other about relationships with little to no input from men. I guess they can solve it by themselves. They don’t need no men!
Exactly! Not letting the men talk is on full display here. Men are not going for that anymore. It's too easy to for men of value to get feminine, beautiful women who are raised to be wives overseas. These women don't know their place.
Leadership mentality???? You can tell that most of these women on this panel COULDN'T follow Shaka Zulu if he tried to lead them out of a wet paper bag. The mere fact that they are even questioning if men and women should look for LIFELONG relationship shows they have no concept, nor respect, for the protection and leadership MEN provide to their significant other. The brother was trying to educate them when he brought up why a man who built himself up by the age of 30+ should even consider a 30+yo woman. But of course, he was strategically overtalked and cut off, lest logic has the chance to make too much sense. If she's not willing to build and nurture a family with a man during her prime as a woman, why should a man give her LIFELONG provision and protection while he is in his prime as a man? If they truthfully spent time with that question, they'd better see how to wield their value and how they are squandering it away with these mindsets. As a man, we must know what's important to a woman and vice versa. These ladies need to know that a MAN worth his weight cares MOST about Loyalty, Respect, and LEGACY. She can make more money or less, as long as she shows she prioritizes those three in the relationship. All of which are ONLY proven through time and trials. So if she wants to wait until she's past her prime (35+) to foster and fulfill that PART of the PARTnership, then don't look stupidly surprised when it's that much more difficult to find a WILLING and QUALIFIED partner. Not, impossible, but much more difficult. And to answer the question posed, real men DO marry their ride-n-dies at the BEGINNING of the ride not the end. However, most women, particularly BW aren't even trying to be "marriage potential", hence the ideologies expressed on this panel.
Discussing any of this with black women always goes the same way. They dont listen. But who cares? They dont have to, they can stay single and disappointed with their own approach.
There are women older than y’all who still work 8 hours and take care of home (married too) , I talk to them everyday and ask them these same questions These ladies are just weak 🤷🏾♂️, this generation.. AT THE END OF THE DAY men CHOOSE WHO WE WANT TO MARRY … good luck smh
![Gunna - HIM ALL ALONG [Official Visualizer]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/HiCxoDeo0hc/mqdefault.jpg)
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The Men’s Perspective on the Race and Marriage Gap is out now on our channel! 🤎
BW KEEP LETTING THESE "LIARS" PLAY IN YOUR FACES!
assemble another panel with the same girls and talk about the values that you want in a husband and marriage
BW NEED TO EXPLORE "ALL" THEIR OPTIONS! NEVER SETTLE FOR "POTENTIAL " WITH MALES! (Ride And Die is Scam!)
SELFISH MALES DO NOT VALUE COMMITMENTS! AND RESENTS RESPONSIBILITIES! LADIEZ. BEWARE!
MARRIAGE IS A STRUCTURE FOR UNITED, LOVING, HAPPY,STRONG FAMILY! LADIEZ,NEVER STRUGGLE! MEN PROVIDE!
AHusband
Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it still men in general that ask women to marry them? Asking women why they’re not married is like asking someone on a job hunt why the companies that interviewed them didn’t hire them. You need to ask the interviewer what it is about the interviewee that made them decide not to hire them. Ask the men they’ve dated why they didn’t marry them. And men aren’t “intimidated” by successful women. But just like women complain about men that talk ad nauseam about work and their job, the successful woman can sometimes make her whole identity about her career. No man wants to feel like he’s talking to a colleague at work when he’s with his woman.
Correct. Men are rarely if ever intimidated by women. When she's too combative a better description would simply be he's just "turned off."
thank you this. hahah. I said the same thing when they asked the men to be quiet! I was thinking "but they're the *very people* you need to be asking!"😅
So true! I've always thought that. Ask men not women why they aren't married.
Exactly and their explanation is to tell black men how much better they are then us and say we are intimidated
The Bible says in Proverbs 18:22 he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.
If black women understood what marriage was with a black man they’d stop asking.
Black women, unlike other ethnic groups of women, don't know what being a submissive wife, motherly like woman is. Most Black women were raised to be dominate, strong independent sistas.
black women aren't wanted by any race of men so there's that
Listening to these black women affirm each other's delusion is a great part of the reason most will not get married.
They don't want marriage... What they want is the Instagram life" (Sex, travel, money, Attention and Emotions)
Most Black women weren't raised to value marriage. They were raised to be strong, independent women, hence the low marriage rate.
@@AntiMasonic93i think it’s more African American, but African women are talked about marriage since they are teen
African women, a lot of them get married. The ones that are not married are the African American women. There’s a difference.
@@obibomaye7785 Incorrect. Alot of the black women who surround me want all those AND Marriage.
I keep hearing the word, “intimidated” Why? Average income for black males= $47,000.00 Average income for black females = $38,000.00 Marriage rate of black males = 29% Marriage rate of black females = 26% Black women are 53% more educated, yet have the highest student loan debt of all races. Yet, still have a medium income that is less, than the black men they are more educated over. 51% of all black males are single and childless. Key Word: Beguile
They are going to keep lying to themselves over and over. They hate the truth.
Marriage rates for black males actually closer to 34%
yeah this whole "intimidated" shit lol no man is intimidated by a woman (on average) At all. She can be a 10/10 making twice what i make and shes still a mf woman?!
Cite the sources for these numbers please.
@@isaywhatiwanttosay2025-4eva US Census Bureau has the most in-depth data.
Kevin Samuels tried to give them tips to get married but the females didn’t listen to him now look at it. Feminism has prevented them from getting married
They were smart. So tired of men telling us what they think is good for us. Sir, are you giving any of these men advise on how not to be a predator?
@@carmeld45 what do you mean by predator
@@carmeld45 So tired of women exaggerating exceptions while trying to victimize themselves. 54% of BM do not have kids & 61% are in the middle class. 97% of BM are NOT incarcerated & have had no contact with the criminal justice system. Ma'am are you giving any of these women advice on how to stop making excuses for their poor choices in men when the majority of men (and not the exceptions) would make more suitable options?
@@r2d187can you drop those sources? I haven’t heard this and can help when I do rebuttals.
Please drop the sources for these statistics please. @@r2d187
BM like feminine women and BW are too masculine for straight BM to be attracted to them thats why there is a lot of leftover BW who are not married because men of other groups also like feminine women.
Why have so many black men who don't date black women have been found out to be gay this year. lol.
@@rosejames5172 they were probably raised by a masculine single mother BW and that made them attracted to masculinity looking at their mother's masculinity.
@@openbob6656 So how do you explain that majority of the gay population around the world are wite? or how do you explain Asian men who are gay?
@@openbob6656 Did you read what wrote? These men date wite and asian women for years then came out saying they are bi and gay.
@@rosejames5172 that is not the majority. Try again with that Jezebel spirit.
They barely let the homies talk smh that’s part of the problem right there lol
Betas do not have leverage 😊
Interesting discussion. I've noticed that all the Highly successful black men in my network are married to other ethnic groups, for example Arab, Turkish, White English and Asian women. The 3 qualities that I often hear why these affluent black men married their partners is due to them being 1) Very feminine, 2) Being non materialistic and 3) Being supportive.
And these women are the downfall of black men. Look at what Cassie, jimmy mai, and others doing to these black men after the relationship is over.
So you're saying that it wasn't because of race?
@africanayasmin6210 I don't know who those individuals are that you mentioned, I assume they're celebrities and I don't follow that culture.
@akinrojugbokan2339 I wouldn't say it's based on ethnic group, I think those men simply found women in other ethnic groups that had the basic character traits that was required for long term marriage. The main one is not being materialistic, their wives are always happy to go to simple places to dine and always try to not spend a lot even though they could. For example, my partner is Polish and she had traditional qualities and is not materialistic and I still spoil her.
@@africanayasmin6210 Jeannie Mai doesn't apply because she is not a feminine woman.
It’s so weird when women say men are intimidated by them because they are successful when men generally don’t care about how successful you are when we are choosing for a relationship.
If you can't tell if it's a woman or transvestite, they may have a point.
They need a stronger panel of Men in my opinion
Agreed!
Why is there a panel of Africans speaking for all black women I’m not African. I’m Black American. They need just speak for them and their culture. There is no black American on that panel leave us out of your conversation.
Ebony is Black American, so her talking points were from a black American perspective. The other ladies on the panel were speaking from an African American perspective.
Notice: Non of those black women are wearing their natural hair. All perms & weaves... Sad 😭😭😭😭😭
💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯
💯
You say that but all the men go for other women with that same hair though. If you’re not a part of the solution you are a part of the problem. Maybe if more blk men chose to date sistas with their natural hair then many more blk woman would wear their natural hair. Simple.
@@morethanrubiesministries2593 You do know a woman is not to preach in church, don't you?? Read Timothy 2:12🤔it's not only the hair, but also the, I don't need a man/I'm a boss bytch!! Who wants a bytch for a wife?? girl bye.
@morethanrubiesministries2593 but I thought they don't dress for men though?!
Why do black women online speak as though they are all making 7 figures or more, you'll see teachers on here talking about not finding anyone on their level 😂
Because the bar is so low that simply being a functional adult is seen as an accomplishment for them.
Right. They be online acting like it’s all phds and entrepreneurs. But what about the sista that works at Walmart or Target? That’s actually the majority
Good point, that also explains why they are some of the most egotistical people you'll ever come across...my goodness. You'll see a barely stable BW talking about she can't find a BM "on her level" 😂 whatever that means
Lol😂 that’s good .. so men can be at peace and not be dying young taking care a Jezebel 😊
I finally understand why some folks hate fresh and fit. This show was this same but with the genders reversed where the hosts brought a bunch of beta losers that couldn't articulate themselves to save their lives.
Truth hurts
I agree.
100%
They'll never figure out the problem if they don't listen to what the man say
Many of the women who say "in African culture you're taught to focus on school and then you're career" but be in five relationships by 25...
So I need to ask, why do we pretend as if the issue isn't us rather than what we're taught (and subsequently don't apply to ourselves anyway)
The guy in the glasses, I appreciate his perspective
I loved this topic. I’m a black woman who’s 51 and have never been married. I wish my generation spoke more deeply about this topic. ❤
Too much blame is being thrown out its crazy....nobody wants to take accountability for their action and choices, if you want to be married by 20, you'll be married by 20. We all chose not to get married, whether its because of financial or culture..
and the put down of black men is crazy, if you're attracting men that feel intimidated by your suceess, or insecure, or have feminine energy..... then the issue isn't the men, the issue is you.
I approve this message
Arnabi don’t start 😂 nobody blamed anyone
@@SahraBenji lol.....I'm just sayin...😅😅...
nobody said i'm not married because i don't want to be marrier" or "i had a chance to marry...but i fuccced it up"
The female panelists kept saying how white men marry early and how they're marrying all these black women.......if this is all true.....why isn't she married then? Why hasn't one of these non-black men married her?
They WORSHIP white men! Yet marriage rates are declining ACROSS the board for all racial groups! This is why black men with options should go overseas and find real black women that respect themselves and don’t worship whites!
Kevin Samuel was absolutely right! These women sounds lost. They are living in fare.
100%
Fear
kevin was dead wrong.
@@rosejames5172young modern person who does not know history from creation thru JESUS. Marriage is a covenant and GOD establish the natural order. These woman are pissed because you are being excluded from the 1% of man. Savannah James proves you wrong. None of you are eligible.
@@duanewoodson9804 Do you have a point?
Real BM are NOT intimidated by BW. This narrative needs to change.
Ain’t no Black American Brotha is intimidated by a Black Woman who makes more lmao. Y’all sound crazy these are African Tether Woman must be something in the water in Africa. Don’t compare Black American Men to African Men, Black American Men we built different period 💯
6:00 she made a great point......i don't think we look at forever, we're in the age of RIGHT NOW....the minute you don't make me happy slightly its on to the next and then the cycle continues. There's a crazy expectations on both men and woman...due greatly to social media, and we always think the grass is better on the other side.
Agreed
I grew up with successful Black men and women who are all still married and had successful marriages. The WM many of our women end up with are below average to average at best. BM still are more financially successful than BW. However average is good on WM but, bad on BM. Here are some points to think about.
1.) For women, the things that make you successful in the workplace will negatively affect femininity in some way.
2.) You must find balance based upon common goals as a union and RESPECT. Where a woman does not respect a man, a relationship can not exist.
3.) BW often overlook the fact they idolize WM with as much vigor as they claim your average male celebrity/athlete does. It's a lot deeper than I want to explain in the interest of keeping this long post short as possible.
4.) Gender roles have not adapted to the modern reality of men and women as well as the wildly different economy than 50 years ago. A wealthy man never expects his wife to build him up but, wealthy women expect their suitors to fullfill traditional roles. In today's world hisnamd and wife have to work in 90% of unions.
5.) Get off SM. Keeping up with the Jones's is real poison. People think marriage is all exotic trips, expensive food and excitement. Marriage is work, commitment, bordem, compromise and baby making.
When discussing these types of topics, next time you guys should invite people who have experience for more than ten years and above.
Exactly
I don’t think so they done well because it’s raw and authentic. Them people married are gonna start capping about their relationship especially those in 5/10 into their relationship. We don’t need that
This is a really interesting topic. First of all it appears that a lot of young people today are approaching relationships and marriage from a consumer point of view. The men and the women are saying things like what can you do for me!? What do you have to offer me? A lot of these conversations are me centered. I understand the potential thing ;I get it. A lot of people have been burned by that potential thing. All of you ladies have to understand that most men don't come into their own until they're in their thirties so it's better to build with them along the way if they are productive. They may not be where you want them to be at the moment but if you play the long game and they are productive, you will reap the benefits. My wife did that with me we had our ups and downs but 27 years later we're living a prosperous life . Don't be in a hurry to gain things or material wealth . Enjoy the journey with your spouse and build methodically along the way.
You guys didn't give the men a chance land their points, so im looking forward to the next episode and make sure that the men out number the women...I suggest if the ladies of Sosa can bring in someone with a different perspective someone like Garang from previous episodes it be great.
I think social media mostly oversize issues and misguide us into generalization of issues. Having said that (Personal opinion) I think in general men can and will date any woman and the amount of money she makes doesn't matter because he's still gonna provide and lead. but for women its a different because women in general tend to date men who make the same amount of money or higher.
God created all of us uniquely different for a reason, i think its because we are supposed to look around for our match and grow together.
i loved this episode and i think the ladies did a great job giving their own perspectives and experiences especially Janet OUR ACHOLI GIRL!, she was on point..shout out to everyone on the panel keep up the great work, WE LOVE YOU & WE ARE PROUD OF YOU GUYS
I want to say this with respect and don’t mean to put any of my black sisters down. I’m only talking about ONE THING and ONE THING ONLY! The hair…
I think many black men are now looking for the real thing…. Example, the wigs and hairstyles all these women in this video have is NOT sexy to many black men. I say, wear whatever you want to wear but don’t let that thing completely change how you really look. Question, if these ladies take off their wigs or weaves, how do they look? Many men have been deceived for a long time by not knowing who they are dealing with until they see the real deal, their women with no wigs or weaves or any other body attachments. Sometimes, the wigs and weaves initially get the man to talk to you but they usually don’t keep the man. Many men like to know who they are dealing with from the beginning. For men with women, what we see is NOT what we get.
So to these ladies, start by showing the world your real look. Wear your natural hair or wigs and weaves that do not completely change how you really look.
In this video, many men can’t really tell how you look. The wigs / weaves are out of control.
This is one of the reasons black men are doing whatever you are talking about….
We respect your opinion! 🤎 We also did an episode on Natural Hair vs Weave that discusses some of the points you brought up.
I’m gonna agree with this because honestly I’m a woman who is natural but will wear wigs weaves braids etc. black women. You will be surprised at the attention you get from MEN not just black once you wear your own hair.
As a part time photographer I share the same views as soundsofdefinition .
I’ve witnessed the reaction of black women when asked to remove the wig or weave and you’ll see where they live; ask most black women to remove their weave or wig their lost without the false confidence. I’m not here to demean anyone but I’ve seen this reaction on multiple occasions. It’s been my experience in witnessing black women that wear weave feel inferior to other races that wear their natural hair and shake their hair in different settings.
I also feel that black women are the last to be desired for marriage because they were coached into believing they did not need a man for success nor did they need a man for their household and so on.
Black men are wayyyy more gentle with non black women. I have witnessed it most of my adult life. We literally get the worst of them then they move on and do better. Just crazy. 🥺
BM are giving the same energy back...that's all.
You need to ask yourself what is that aura the none black ladies possess, that bring out the best in black man
False. Femininity is not determined by race & when a woman possesses and exudes an abundance of it & it's authentic then THAT's what the man is attracted to - not her race.
Not true, bm men statistically don't marry them either and they have a higher chance of becoming single baby mothers. So it may appear that they treat them better but statistically they don't.
THEY DO NOT DO BETTER!.... BW ACTUALLY DO A LOT BETTER INTERRACIAL MARRIAGE!.... (Research The Data)
I think the main disparity is due to cultural values and the way we operate in the world. As it was mentioned, other races are taught to date for marriage in college and look for providers. In our community, we have high single mother rates and aren’t taught to value marriage. The men don’t have role models anymore either so they don’t even know what it means to protect and provide so they look for women to “help” them build instead of building by themselves. Also, watching their mothers do everything is pushing the narrative that black women are independent and are good enough to struggle with.
Both are to blame as to why the culture is in a highly dysfunctional with values and decline in marriage. I also agree that black women have stepped up economically and the men are behind which is causing an imbalance so we have to seek mates from other races the more successful we become.
In today’s society, black people are their own worst enemies right now. I’m not sure how long it will take to fix the dysfunctions but starting with changing the values and requiring marriage over being a man’s baby mama is a start!
Men's disparity??? They shut the men down completely. These people are not serious
In fairness I don't think we can discuss Black relationships in America without considering the various disruptions to healthy, functional relationships. It's difficult to fully put the onus on Black men or women without historical context. Our relationships have never been encouraged, except for breeding during a particular time period. Now it's discouraged due to the decline in the Caucasians birth rate, along with the threat of Blackness. Not controlling social/economic institutions or information dissemination puts us at a disadvantage.
There are more successful Blk Men than Blk Women in the U.S.
Women in my culture chose pookie’s and bums in their prime years that’s it
The women proving why the stats are the way they are 🤣 can’t make this up
Exactly, they blame black men for everything, plus from this video they don't sound pleasant to be around
I like this conversation and I am also Nigerian American. You guys should talk more about this topic
Nothing interesting about what they said! Most of them come from single mom households and were not raised to be or are qualified to be wives. You follow their stupidity and reject your own culture you will end up just as bad if not worse than then!
But they are not listening to the men. They have no idea what a man value
@@andrejamison2723That's 💯, unfortunately, women look at things from their perspective only. Women don't listening to men only The State,The Church, their jobs, and The Media
You are an African and not American Nigerian or Nigerian American😢😢😢😢😮😢
@@uchennanwosu2488 I am an American citizen so I am American 🇺🇸 and I also renounced my Nigerian citizenship
Ladies, you are missing the mark. Most women on the panel only spoke about material, wealth, and career.
One woman briefly brought up religion. I'd like to hear the ladies factor religion or christian values into their decision making and choosing a proper mate.
The part of this conversation that is not talked about enough the the way some men/boys are coddle and are not condition to want marriage at all to a certain extent, and how women/girls are told to wait for a that was never socially conditioned to want marriage at an early age (20-35) because of hookup culture.
BM (in America) also forget that THEY are the ones that are supposed to propose, not the other way around.
And if you look at the history of marriage and why is began, IT ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH BUSINESS & MONEY.
If 61% of BW have children (59% of that number by multiple men) while only 46% of BM have children, which gender has been coddled & which gender is most responsible for hookup culture? If BM out-earn BW, which gender has been coddled? If BM according to the CDC are the most involved fathers in the lives of their children in the country, which gender has been coddled? If 33% of BM are married & 85% of the time it's to a BW while 26% of BW are married & 93% of the time it's to a BM, which gender has been coddled? If BM are married to WW at an 8% rate & BW are married to WM at a 4% rate, which gender has been coddled? If 39% of BM & 61% of BW identify as LGBT, which gender has been coddled? If 97% of BM are NOT incarcerated-54% do NOT have children-and 61% of BM are in the middle class-all majorities-then "coddled" is NOT a description that applies to a majority of BM as those men are highly productive & are leading their communities.
@@r2d187 that’s the point dummy, especially BW in older generations that were a mother in a two parent household STILL coddled Black male children while daughter are indoctrinated in to servitude from birth.
Every household is different, but the children of old and new are now telling their truth and their true experiences in their own family dynamics because they are know given a chance to be heard.
BW for that past 10 years stories are just now being listened too on a large scale and BM especially are liking that BW are pushing back in the toxicity that the black community, toxic black men, and toxic black mammies/women caused.
@@r2d187 a black men ain’t their most involved father and that was not a stat from the CDC, it was a SELF-Reported study and samples a small portion of men which is not the most accurate representation of America and anecdotal evidence will 1000% otherwise
11:38 hit the nail on the head brother👍🏿
Yup. He said a mouthful there.. They had to silence him for a bit. Good points bro.
Cause Too many Sisters wana be Brothers !!!!
Why would anyone want to be the least educated most incarcerated demographic?
Anyone would not want to. But we are a cursed people! The Children of Israel cursed by the God of Israel.
I’m confused do these women wanna marry a man or a women??? Why do y’all not wanna hear what the man had to say y’all could learn alot instead yall cutting him off and saying y’all don’t want his input
I Wish Kevin Samuels was here
Just an observation, but I heard these ladies bemoan the lack of masculine, traditional men yet the entire exchange they didn’t want to hear the young men on the panel give their experience and input while at the same time talking about the types of relationships they want, which are the opposite of traditional. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a partnership, but I’m afraid the types of men who want the types of relationships these ladies want, they would deem too feminine. You seem to want a gangsta/stock broker/gay/abusive dude which just doesn’t exist. I really wish you all the best of luck, but I just don’t think you have any idea what you want.
Wasted 10 mins of my time , I’ll never get back ……… why ask a question as to why men don’t want to marry black women …. Then not allow the very same men to answer that question ….. ? Grab your passports gents
Losers will ALWAYS find a way to lose! Fellas, get your passport, let them fail...
Another podcast discussing the lost value system. Ladies, just like you believe in the motto of my body my choice. Men follow the mantra, my wife my choice. If you don’t give us what we desire you won’t become our wife.
I dont think women really care about that. Especially if the men dont have any money which is one of the issues pointed out in the video.
@@PhDiva02this narrative doesn’t work anymore. 61% of black men are in the middle class. Black men earn more on average than black women. The majority of black men are childless meaning we are able to save more of our income. Why create a straw man argument about black men not having money when the majority do?
Around the 50:00 to 55:00 mark, the ladies kept saying if a woman goes through X,Y and Z, there's no guarantee she'll get a ring which is true, but that's not the ideal way to look at it because nothing in life is a 100% guarantee, outside of death of course. The best you can (and should) do is work to improve your chances. Just like if your trying to get to a certain collage or applying for a particular job, women have to use a similar mindset if they seek marriage.
[**in the western world**]
1) Choices
"Life is a matter of choices and every choice you make, makes you." [John C Maxwell]
2) High standard of living in the western world:
Marriage is increasingly becoming more of a luxury than a necessity (e.g., Mr. and Miss Independent). Historically, marriage was the primary means of survival for women but that is no longer the case in the western world (e.g., section 8 housing, food stamps, Obamacare, free public schools).
3) Cultural values
"You are basically saying that the most successful of us can never find the right relationship unless it is with a white counterpart...." @Ammanuel.
For the most part, Africans gain a LOT when we move to the west (e.g., education, jobs, businesses, partnerships). However, at what COST? Is there a cost to living in a European centered environment as an African? Does it cause us to think or act in ways that are inherently foreign to us to survive (e.g., “preferring” what is not us)?
4) Antiblackness
The narrative in the western world is that everything “black” is negative and criminal. Instead of society celebrating the professional success of black men and women, they have found a way to make it negative (e.g., college degrees/professional success/personal development = a lack of marriages). STAY WOKE!
Excellent job, Ladies of Sosa and ALL of the panel members!
Peace, love, and light
Your Nigerian sister
Most of what you said has truth in in except the anti-blackness part. Nigerian men in particular do extremely well in the USA. I believe that Nigerian men get 25% (out of the amount of black men that attend college in USA) of the best paying college educated jobs, and there are not that many in the USA. Nigerians have been brought up with strict discipline unlike Americans.
Most men in the USA and western countries are starved for feminine women and will jump at the chance to get a feminine woman. Feminine women are nearly impossible to find in western countries.
When I saw the panel set up, I was like Ebony seems like among the top 2 that I can date. But when she spoke...I realised she said some of the dumbest things I have heard.
1. Her take on forever. If forever is to be negotiated upon as you go, like do you know what marriage is? I have never met a single lady (from any race) who if given the chance to be with the love of her life forever - that she will question that.
And if she is saying marriage doesn't interest her...then she was a wrong guest for the topic being discussed. Marriage worries you guys (as it should) and that is why it's a topic.
2. That black women are the most successful they have been. Well, it depends on what success is to you & what metrics you use in measuring it. Yes! Education wise, women, black women to be precise are more educated (which is good for us all) & career progression...all good! But let me bring the plane to a landing, if black women are becoming this awesome how come the statistics still say they the least race to get married? Okay let's go with the agenda that black men are so scared of the success of black women...how come White men are not flocking to marry y'all? Black men are not making enough, are not good enough...how come black men is the race that marry more among other races? How come women of other races want to marry black men? (The other lady whose boyfriend ended up with a white lady need to ask herself what did she did wrong. Clearly, she found him good enough to marry...cause she sounded lowkey disappointed..so the issue perhaps, couldn't be with the guy. She seems like a sweet girl though esp her take on forever- beautiful! Wish her well)
My point in finality? Why are black women not getting married? It goes back to the family unit, as a black man..I will blame us men for that failure - the absence of fathers in the home is the cause. Asians (Chinese in particular) have the least divorce rate & we see how that translate to their kids doing well, low crime involvement, strong family bond and all of that. So black fathers need to stick with their families...be that strong moral compass...train your kids well, give them a mirror of what marriage is.
And young black ladies stop saying cause you have financial success you don't need a man. How many women will trade having a loving husband, kids to career success? How many? Tell me. Marriage is good! God almighty created it. America lost God & we are seeing where is it (🇺🇸) descending to now.
Peace ✌🏿🖤
(For sure! The longest comment I have written on any social media platform)
It’s all good. I appreciate your comment bro. You made good points
@mothegoat6865 it's all love fam 🖤
To say why other men aren’t flocking to black women. I’ll say this as a BW. We don’t flock to other races of men that’s thee answer You should know.
We turn them down I see it everyday. In NYC very gentrified and WM and others are interested they feel they have no chance so some don’t even try.
We’re least married by BM because black men do not marry!!!! they rarely want to settle down or do it late in life. They marry out often because well most BM that date out do have serious self hate and suffer us BW thru colorism etc. If Bw want marriage they have to date out and expand those options. Plenty BM are just not ready on so many levels. BM number one online crying about everything concerning BW we have to date out and date BM that got it together.
Dont blame us men for Fathers not being in the home. Its a misinterpretation of the facts. To assume that men chose not to be in the home is just that. An assumption. By the early 1960s Black men were in the home at >80% in America. What happened? The Pill, Feminism, Welfare, the Sexual Revolution and the genesis of virulent anti BM Feminism were choices made by BW in America. BM in America couldn't defend against the onslaught as a disenfranchised, demonized minority >100 yrs up from Slavery and just out of Jim Crow. If African men dont learn the lessons the same can happen in Africa once the social engineering gains traction
Great points - until the part about blaming black men. Black women aren't getting married because they are over-sexualized & value sexual promiscuity over being in a cooperative relationship with a stable & consistent man. They value freedom to have as many sexual partners & baby showers as they want over saving themselves for one good man. Fathers & grandfathers have been speaking on this for generations but no one has cared to listen. But the data doesn't lie - The problem is not the men because Black men are more married than black women are despite being outnumbered by black women by more than 500K.
The panel was nice. The ladies made good points on the value of marriage
Well if anyone needed the answer to why black women are least likely to get married, just listen to them speak amongst themselves in this podcast, The affirmation of delusions, the speaking over the men, the implicit denial of contrary points was telling! This podcast said more to this phenomenon than i think even they expected.
We are not intimidated by yall. We are repulsed.
Yet you're watching
@@samanthayates8812 We are watching cause it is entertainment. DUHHH
Marriage is Togetherness faithfulness Godliness Discipline Knowledge RESPECT Intelligent Proverbs 31:1-31 Prosper In CHILDREN 👉
It's Not about Money It's About RESPECT Intelligent GODLINESS Faithful Lifestyle Proverbs 31:1-31 DECENT Cloth yourselves with GODLINESS TRUTH Wisdom knowledge
I think maybe they should ask black men what they want. Most black men marry black women.
13:28 She's right we see each other as competition too much and too often instead of a team.
Because we have loots of Stephan’s and not enough Django’s in the community. Self love and pride in preservation is real. We need each other.
If you aim for a failed marriage you’ll never miss.
Yes, people grow but that’s why it’s important to find someone with the same core values because you’ll grow toward the same common goals.
This is not to say you’re guaranteed success but the difference in likelihood of your marriage lasting is significant. ALSO why would you bring children into a pre-determined broken family. They’re now put in a worse position.
More successful is not intimidating to us black men it's the attitude that comes along with the female success that's the problem with black women...
“Women shouldn’t have to audition for marriage”
What do y’all think the point of dating and getting into a relationship is?
You’re both auditioning for marriage. So act accordingly.
I’m a 49 y/o black man. I was a full time single parent with my youngest being a girl. I have a sister in her late 50s not married and a niece in her mid 30s. Neither has children. Men are not intimidated by successful women and men are not “choosing” white women. Men are open to finding compatibility and someone supportive, understanding and the least amount of drama. Most of the time it’s proximity, whether it’s school, work, the gym. We like natural beauty, feminine energy and compromise. The men you ladies are picking that are feminine, you picked. He was more than likely raised by a woman. Men also don’t compete to make a certain amount of money. We want to be happy with our work. We value experience over education. We are not intimidated by women making more money. Ladies keep giving other ladies advice and every time one of the men speak, they get shamed and insulted for their views. I can’t pay for all the bills, while you keep all your money. That’s not fair.
Speak for yourselves! Engaged three times, first marriage lasted 7-years and happily married for 15 -years now!😊
The guy with the glasses adds nothing to the conversation… ever lol. Every conversation is “what about men”, “what about men.” But at the sametime, he will back up on what he says to fit any and every narrative when he gets push back. It’s extremely hard to have a conversation with someone like that. I think he’s a little insecure about his career/education, so he can’t see outside of himself. I wonder what some of the other men would have said if they were up there …. they seem to have better careers.
No woman is worried about “losing” a man that has nothing. Yes, Asian… white and hispanic men and women will build together AND they don’t leave the women they build with for the most part. In general, black men will leave the black women he built with because he starts to believe he’s “better” then her or starts to go for the women that never looked at him when he had nothing.
80% of black men are married to black women. Spreading a false narrative that black men leave their women is inaccurate. Especially because women file for divorce nearly 70% of the time. Men have more to lose leaving their wives. Women have more to gain leaving their husbands.
Relationships/marriages are ended by women 80% of the time & if the woman is highly educated they tend to leave 90% of the time. The reasons you described for why men leave is incorrect & has always been associated with why a woman leaves a man after SHE levels up. Men leaving relationships is an extremely rare occurrence. For example, how many times has a man broken up with you compared to how many times YOU broke up with a man? Case closed.
As grim as it looks I still hold out hope. Single, 41, Never married no kids for my Black wife and future family. I ain't that old yet.
marriage is a bad deal, be free, smash beauty's when you're 60
A PROVERBS 31:1-31 Women Knows How to Up keep her Home Children Self Respect Not Nudity Proverbs 31:1-31
These Females LACK Knowledge HOSEA 4:1 Love is not Sex Drugs Lies GREED period Love is LIVING GOD Commands John 15:10
Its a new age, I don't like that marriage is pushed on women before age 25. Also, I don't like that society looks down on women who are not married by age 25. I think women should be taught to get themselves together, be happy, travel, make friends, work on themselves. Do all of that before marriage.
Nobody wants to marry a left over ha ha ha ha ha😮😮😮🎉😢
For any man regardless of colour, after watching this would you like to date (not smash) let alone marry anyone on the panel?
We all know the answer.
If we appreciated marriage and families more than anything else, especially in the AA community. Things would turn around. We'd rather see the basketball court than the reverend's court. I'd also love to see more African/AA unions as well to keep our people growing.
A Woman Provides For Her Family Home Kids Proverbs 31:1-31 It's Why She is Worthy to Be PRAISED 👉💯👀
These privileged ladies on the panel ignore their ancestral history with all the struggle and sacrifices made for the good of the Family. These woman really think GOD is not going to provide the response to them.
There aren't many clean GODly women.
Ladies, you looked over a very important point. We have none traditional women looking for traditional relationships. That will never work because the mentally does not match. Plus men in general are not intimidated by your success. Most women not matter what level their at are looking for high level men. But most of you are not attracting those men for relationships. You get what you are attracting.
Is it so hard to say husband and wife then partner?
Been telling black men for years you don’t need them.. maybe that could be a reason just saying
Its a struggle for them to follow the order of GOD.
Black women are not making all the money. Black men out earn black women.
Preferring a group of men who marry the least (black men, 29%) will result in you decreasing your odds of getting married it’s not rocket science. Black women that date out are more likely to get married and do.
So true. I dated out and got proposed to in less than a year.
No they don't all u have to do is research the numbers are in BM marry at a much higher rate than bw also interracial the number us even higher so what exactly are u talking about ???
Exactly ! Marriage with them barely benefit us anyway as a whole
Black men marry the least out of all races of men. 29% of black men marry that is a low number which affects black women. Now that black women are dating out more and are dating men who statistically marry at much higher rates black women’s marriage rates will increase.@@Dakingalbert2
Exactly. My mother is dating a Mexican man and he proposed less than a year too. Black men rarely marry anyone. They make everyone a babymama. Everyone knows that.@@MsLotusBlooms
Why didn't they have more brothers on this panel? We need some serious push back on these conversations.
GOD Told All PEOPLE 👉 To LIVE his Commands LOVE JOHN 15:10 and TEACH THEM to YOUR CHILDREN Proverbs 31:1-31 WOMEN
Black women used to be the most married but the "system" changed that and the morality of the black wedded family.
Not true. Black women became unmarried as soon as integration became legal.
@@MsLotusBlooms I am not talking about integration or interracial marriage.
Before the 1960s marriage rates of black women were very high.They were married to black men.
@@Mmari7697because black men weren’t aloud to date out their race, now that they are, black woman are least married
@@Mmari7697 Exactly. Segregation ended in 1964. Black women were married prior to integration. Integration was the catalyst for marriage cessation.
That is a lie tell that to me & my 2 sisters who are all married. Please stop the stereotype.
ur personal anecdotes don’t disprove statistics
@@TaureanTruthShush. Logic confuses them.
The rarity doesn't make the rule
When she says men get intimidated and exude feminine energy... Around successful women. They say things like What's up "Big Money" or When you gone take me out? Because they see she works hard for her success. Men that are looking for handouts, will always be intimidated, by hard working women.
The black men that they should/want to marry are not intimidated by a woman who makes money. That is a cop out. It's the pookies and ray-rays that women like dealing with that are insecure... But of course the narrative is that the black men that have made something of themselves and make good money are intimidated by a woman doing the same makes no damn sense.
A 8 year old can Read Write God said his Word is not hidden from his PEOPLE it's ALREADY in They MOUTH & HEART DEUTERONOMY 30:14
I'm not sure what it's like where you guys live but I'm not trying to get with someone poor. I'm looking for combine incomes in order to get a better loan from the bank for a mortgage.
Boy... they didn't waste any time blaming black men for their marital outcomes.🙄🤣😂🤣 I pulled up to hear accountability🤷🏾♂️
These young ladies high! 😂😂😂
These black women at the start only proved the point of the problem of black women in the beginning of the video. The combativeness and the overtalking other people ( the men on the podcast) and blaming their inability to have the good relationships on men is ironic. Their pin the ways women behave emotionally and say that men should behave that way as well. Who relegated women to be the legislators of what is deemed an ideal way to behave that is narcissistic in its nature and being. Women should not be trashing men in this way the same way that men accept women’s behaviours and ideals ( tall rich handsome ext). It is insane how far women have become brainwashed to think men and women are the same and that men should think more like women. I miss the good old days, when black families were together and people understood and accepted their differences. Before y’all get mad I’ll use the race and gender card too. This is coming from a black women too, I see this shit close to home and in my community the most.
You are definitely a rare gem 💎and much more needed in our community. I’m a black man and happy there are woman like you who think more balanced.
I’m African but man I used to admired how black American relationships used to be in the 50s and 60s ,it was very similar to how African relationships are ,black Americans during those times used to value marriage a lot ,during that time black pepper were United even if they were going through segregation,racism and discrimination,they were doing better than now,traditional values were still existing and there was no hate between black men and women in the US ,now it is upside down, marriage is treated like a joke ,people want the perfect men or women when in marriage no one is going to be perfect as relationships will have their ups and downs moments ,people love demand stuff and want unrealistic relationships,also the promotion of baby mamas ,single motherhood ,being naked in media and everything has changed the black American culture to the point where a lot of African don’t want to be a part of sadly ,that’s where a lot of disagreement between African and black American comes from I believe,I honestly wished that the families vales that people in the 60s had and the Union of the black community in America would eventually come black ,because during those times we have witness some of the most influential black American people in history because black American community were United .
1:13 The point of marriage is under God Not people.
It's a multifaceted problem that isn't changeable for blacks. But it's the combination of american bw not wanting marriage (my sister falls into this category); having better employment and educational opportunities; bm and men in general preferring other races; being savvy and skilled enough to survive without it.
When You single you not Suspose to Date period You Suspose to live Godliness Discipline PROVERBS 31:1-31 Ist Corinthians 7:34
Where can I find these studies?
Google. Or your local college library
Is it really a disparity if single women are the happiest women? Just saying …
@@kylechaplain8073Your response is a case and point of why single women are happier. Easily triggered, misogynoiristic, and really really bad logic. No one wants to deal with that day in and day out.
Interesting perspective. 😊
Stay single powerful queen lol
@@jujurush6317 Oh of course, my happiness is paramount.
50% of women earn $40,000 I'm trying to understand
One thing I've noticed on this panel. AA OR Motherland everyone on that panel is a chocolate Black person. Yet we act miles away mentally. That's the sad part.
so they basically told the men to shut up. 😂 women stay talking to each other about relationships with little to no input from men. I guess they can solve it by themselves. They don’t need no men!
Exactly! Not letting the men talk is on full display here. Men are not going for that anymore. It's too easy to for men of value to get feminine, beautiful women who are raised to be wives overseas. These women don't know their place.
Leadership mentality???? You can tell that most of these women on this panel COULDN'T follow Shaka Zulu if he tried to lead them out of a wet paper bag.
The mere fact that they are even questioning if men and women should look for LIFELONG relationship shows they have no concept, nor respect, for the protection and leadership MEN provide to their significant other. The brother was trying to educate them when he brought up why a man who built himself up by the age of 30+ should even consider a 30+yo woman. But of course, he was strategically overtalked and cut off, lest logic has the chance to make too much sense. If she's not willing to build and nurture a family with a man during her prime as a woman, why should a man give her LIFELONG provision and protection while he is in his prime as a man? If they truthfully spent time with that question, they'd better see how to wield their value and how they are squandering it away with these mindsets.
As a man, we must know what's important to a woman and vice versa. These ladies need to know that a MAN worth his weight cares MOST about Loyalty, Respect, and LEGACY. She can make more money or less, as long as she shows she prioritizes those three in the relationship. All of which are ONLY proven through time and trials. So if she wants to wait until she's past her prime (35+) to foster and fulfill that PART of the PARTnership, then don't look stupidly surprised when it's that much more difficult to find a WILLING and QUALIFIED partner. Not, impossible, but much more difficult.
And to answer the question posed, real men DO marry their ride-n-dies at the BEGINNING of the ride not the end. However, most women, particularly BW aren't even trying to be "marriage potential", hence the ideologies expressed on this panel.
Yak Yak Yak. Bottom line, the black men you would want, don't want you!
🤣
Mr glasses should’ve sat this one out! Insecurities are oozing and it’s loud!
they was shutting homeboy out every good point he made smh sad 🤦🏽♂️🚮
I would of stayed if they let him get his points out im not tryna hear no echo chamber of women we need different perspectives
This is why black podcasts don’t work. Talking all over each other Never. Letting another person speak
Omg. Playing the victim
There are many reasons but to be honest, its just how the society is on America. There's not much black women can do about it. That's the harsh truth.
Discussing any of this with black women always goes the same way. They dont listen. But who cares? They dont have to, they can stay single and disappointed with their own approach.
I was ready to hear some accountability then it went left.
"Why are black women least married? Black men fault"
But what about the other men?
The behavior in the video, answers the question that is the title
explain their behavior
@@shaniahpaster12thuggish ignorant behaviour
@@shaniahpaster12masculine af, and not attractive
@@topshootersniper7544so you dislike women with an opinion?
There are women older than y’all who still work 8 hours and take care of home (married too) , I talk to them everyday and ask them these same questions
These ladies are just weak 🤷🏾♂️, this generation..
AT THE END OF THE DAY men CHOOSE WHO WE WANT TO MARRY … good luck smh