10 Things That Tell You're Old Money
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- Опубликовано: 17 июн 2024
- The old money aesthetic is everywhere on social media right now, but what does real old money look like? In this video I share the 10 things that tell you're old money. Live a more fabulous future by taking part in my FREE workshop: fabulousfutureformula.com/
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Anna Bey is an elegance expert and educator, teaching women how to transform their lives to enjoy a more refined personal presence and lifestyle. She's been featured in The Times UK, Newsweek, New York Post, Cosmopolitan and many more. For more information about Anna, visit: annabey.com
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Thank you for watching! Share with me, What is it about the old money that you like the most? Or dislike the most?
It's legacy. It's tenure. It's debt free.
I love the historical furniture and the thought of things being passed down for generations.
It's Warren Buffett masquerading as the Queen
I admire the Tenacity thru Loss
I love the old money dressing because it always stands out in a very unique way
All what i want IS having money, old or New doesn't matter 😂
$1 = .13 ¢ last month.
@@kimgordon3695 what do u mean
Saame 😂😂😂
This kkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
😂😂😂
I have this mindset, (*I Was debt free by 35) Leaving a legacy to my children. Old money starts with me. Have to start somewhere.
Hear hear!
ok miss girl, do what you gotta do ! 🙏🏾🙏🏾
Exactly
learn your kids to marry equally rich then, because this is what old money does ... and in fact it is self-regulating across the entire population in fact that people tend to marry in the same wealth group
@@MegaTinni trueee, to maintain the family's wealth and its growth, they choose to marry into fellow old money individuals as well
When I studied at the University of Cambridge I became quite close friends with the nephew of a Countess and I can confirm so many of these points! He was one of the most polite guys I've ever met, but also one of the most confident due to his family history. From his clothes I would have never guessed he was of noble descendent: for instance, when playing tennis he wouldn't dress in anything fancy, but told me later on he had a tennis court at home where he played with his dad!!
Wow!
That impressive! Yes, ancestry is very important to traditional families and they take pride in it.
Why didn't you marry Him? Or at least stay in friendship ,sounds like a very Kind person and good Soul 😁
Ooh which college? I was at Catz
@@Kiara_Wrestler I was at Lucy but he was at Jesus
My fiancé came from an old money family. Can you believe that he worked at fast food and coffee shops when he was younger just to learn to be an independent person? He’s so down to earth that you will never think that they are that rich.
He’s a CEO in their family business now and he treats his employees with so much respect. He’s a wonderful man ☺️
So lucky ^^ Where did you meet? Wish I could find such a man myself
Two of my ex boyfriends were from the same background, except they were so different 😆 The first was like the guy you mentioned, really polite, hard worker, etc, and like my family, had to work for money, not through necessity but for character building. The second just enjoyed spending his parents' money and messing around on his estate, throwing huge house parties, etc. 😒
There’s needs to be more CEOs like him!
I can believe it…. My father refused to buy me a car like all my friends (who were getting Mercedes and hummers, no accounting for teenage taste haha) until I worked at an ice cream shop and then waiting tables. He taught us the value of a dollar early and the importance I’d hanging on to it. I was complaining about something trivial once and he pointed out the Porsche our neighbor had, then proceeded to explain to me exactly how much debt they were in… That was an important early lesson in appearances not always being what they seem.
Aw. What a sweet story. So do you still get free fries at McDonald's? Do tell. 🍟
I used to tutor/babysit a 15-year-old girl from an old money family before sending her off to a British boarding school. I spent a week with her in the best hotel, showed her around the city, trained her English communication skills etc. Everything she used looked luxurious, but like Anna always says, no logo (well, until she opened her washbag and there was obviously something from Chanel). She never showed me that "I've paid you, peasant" attitude like most my other clients do. She told me to order any room service, showed appreciation for my help and called me "big sister" (I was melted). The only thing she requested during the week was Shin Ramyun (spicy instant noodles). I refused to spend her money and had a week of Shin Ramyun with her.
Prior to meeting her, I had met her older sister, who apparently had several Hermes bags which she took to the meeting room, put on the floor and casually shoved under the desk. That's a strong contrast with those who threw their bags and coats in your face. These sisters are eye-opening, in a very good way. They are friendly, kind, and humble; even if they hired you to do things for them, they would treat you with respect. At times I heard my colleagues joked about how the sisters owned so many Hermes bags at a young age, that they were spoiled etc. I told them about the Shin Ramyun and educated my colleagues not to be so judgemental. Seriously, they're not spoiled or big spenders, that's the price range they are comfortable with but it's unfortunately not the same as your range.
P.S. One funny story. One time when my boss was travelling to China, the parents of these sisters were also on a business trip there and they invited my boss for dinner. My boss wore his best suit and had his hair done and such, but eventually, the clients took him to the street food market and wondered why my boss was so over-dressed🤣
My parents came from "old money", growing up i only wore tailored clothing, and my mom actually had stores closed down so she can shop. That being said, everything anna said is SPOT ON...the richer you are, the more low key you are ...you will never see millionaires act like they are so filthy rich....everything is subtle but absolutely polished and "clean". They always respect service people, and are always empathetic BUT ...to get into their personal life is VERY difficult. My mom is nice to everyone but who she calls on the phone is very few, because she trusts only those who are in the same community as she is. I revolted when i was a kid, but now being older i actually appreciate and enjoy her style...very classy
mah
lmao who's gonna believe it
I’ve always wondered how wealthy people get/ask stores to close for them? Interesting 🤔
Wow
@@iamthedeath lol riiiiight. old money would not be watching these videos
One of my Mother's biggest complaints was that we were too poor for me to go to Finishing School. Later, I got a job working for a prominent "old money", as you say it, family and her first comment was "Now you will learn some manners!" Haha. My employers treated me very nicely and I learned a great deal about how things are done. Good manners, a knowledge of etiquette, being cultured and having a good education will take a person quite far in life. Some of these things build character so that even if a lady doesn't have the opportunity to move in the first circles, she will always stand out as a fine person. What I like about "old money" is that such people are often very pleasant and easy. They are often quite discreet about things and have a sense of service and obligation towards others. They are comfortable about themselves and do not feel the need to boast about their possessions or lives. What I dislike is that such circles can be rather closed to people who are not the same as they are. I think the best thing is to take such people at face value, not to try to be like them but to emulate the good points that are accessible.
This is so very true! Especially the very pleasant and easy.
Life lesson gifts 💖
You mentioned pros and cons that were nail on the head! I had the opportunity to go to finishing school just for a short time and what I gathered was this: good manners are expressions of respect to those around us. It says, “I care enough to spend time to learn how to act around you because I care what you think of me.” And you, my friend, already exude that manner in your empathy for inclusion in a group that can be somewhat cliquey. You obviously already had “good manners”, just by thinking of others the way you do
Nicely put! ❤️
Great advice. Thank you!
Anna, you should do a video on (traditionally) old money/classic brands vs nouveau/flashy brands. As you mentioned, it can be difficult to find or hear of more subtle designers if you didn’t grow up with them!
Edit: You could even divide it into different videos-activewear, formal, travel, seasonal, etc. Learning of lesser-known but classic, timeless, and quality brands would be wonderful.
That's a great suggestion! I would love to see that too please @AnnaBey
I would love a video like that. But here are some old money brands: Hérmes, Aspinal of London, Brooks Brothers, Aigle, Pucci, J Crew and yes, GAP. Otherwise hunting brands, clothes made by a tailor, and inherited clothes. I wear a lot of old clothes from my two grandmothers. mink coat, scarfs, bags, jewelry, dresses etc.
Barbour, Hunter (the iconic Hunter wellies), and of course a good old Mackintosh raincoat 🤔
love, love, love, LOVE!!!!
Yes! This is something I had requested in one of her other survey posts. Brands that are quality but not designer, necessarily. I get the feeling she made this video to set up for something like that in the future. 😉
People who have new money worked very very hard to get their money. It was not handed to them. My hat's off to hard work & perseverance.
You are right.
Plus proper education and intelligence, beyond that B-degree.
either that or their dad was new money and gave them a leg up
My husband comes from an Old Money family. Apart from studying in the best schools, he’s also worked on the trash collecting system, lived in the dangerous neighborhoods to save money, as well as other small jobs because his family kept him out of the money privileges from the teenage to the young adult life, so that he could learn about life.
Now a days he runs the family business, and he is a very kind person. Sometimes I get pissed off to the fact that people sometimes try to hurt him on the back, taking his kindness for granted, but then I realize that I have a lot to learn from him.
For the fact that he’s got this safety net, a lot of these things don’t actually affect him, he can take his time to learn how to be a good manager, without losing his character or getting emotionally affected to what’s going around him.
I am an anxious person, as I come from a poor background, sometimes I take too seriously when a situation doesn’t go as I was expecting, or people try to undermine the projects, its just seem I am about to lose everything.
This is the difference from the old money people, they tend to be calm, relaxed, even when things go wrong, they seems to always have a solution, someone to call, something that they can pay… because they know that is just a point to be overcome and literally just a few things can really impact their status.
And by the way, he is the kindest guy I have ever met. On our first date we had the most amazing conversations, so relaxed and able to listen, not trying to sell himself out. (Actually he kind of lied and told me he worked on marketing, for a small company, he was starting to have the first clients. And I thought he was broke, but a hardworking guy and passionate guy about to have a bright future). He drove me home and said “bye”, with a nice smile, waited until I got inside. He didn’t try to kiss me or something like that. I just felt so comfortable around him that I decided we could be good friends…
But then he had extra plans, he would literally go see me in my poor neighborhood everyday, to walk out my dog with me at late night.
I mean, I have dated a broke guy who lived close by, he would stay in the car waiting for me to walk the dog so that we could hang out., he wouldn’t even give the dog some attention. My husband used to leave his “palace” and cool neighborhood just to walk out my dog with me and have a couple minutes of chatting every single day.
After about 15 days he asked me to be his girlfriend. It seems like a teenage story but we were about 25. The sweetest guy ever.
Of course I got very confused after discovering his background, I wouldn’t even have proper clothes to all of his social events. I used to get stressed out about going to restaurants and not being able to share the bills, cause he’s lifestyle was completely over my budget. I didn’t want to feel that I was selling myself out, but I really liked him. So I had to open up and talk about how this had been stressing me out, not him, but our differences, from budget, lifestyle, to family history, plans for the future. Fortunately, we were able to make it work.
Beautiful story, you were very luky because he seems to be a very good and decent person.
So lovely ❤️ thanks for sharing
I don't believe you. You look like a Plain Jane. Not only that, but why would he pick you when he could pick any woman who doesn't come from a trashy and mediocre background?
Thanks for sharing this. This give me so much about choosing a right man
Lovely! Thanks for sharing
Wish you happy life ❤
Yes! In my 20"s, I worked in a store selling fine jewelry. Many times the people that looked as if they couldnt afford anything actually were from old money. Never be rude to anyone ! Dont underestimate people.
I worked at a Kay's jewelry store in college in a rough mall. The ostentacious gangbangers wearing grills and designer bags/accessories often had terrible credit and no cash either. Couldn't buy anything. But the discreet folks were the ones who made it rain and bought all kinds of merch without blinking.
Your description of people that looked as if they couldn’t afford are the wealthy Asians. Being lowkey and humble is an important Confucian trait. From manner to dressing up, especially the traditional east asians, they are very lowkey. Way too many stories of Asians vacationing in the US, being discriminated against in high end stores only because they don’t look the part. They go in the store wearing tennis shoes, pants, sweater and a crossover sling bag, and they wouldn’t be help until they just leave the store. What they don’t know is that they go back to their countries in Asia and it’d be all over the news cause ‘so and so comes from one of the wealthiest clans but was shooed away from an Hermes store in New York’.
As far as I met old money people while studying in Oxford, I found that nobody there is doing fillers to their lips. They are very polite and intelligent. Does not matter what you are wearing, It is a matter of your degree, knowledge and culture - talking quite, always keep smiling and ready to help.
I grew up in a Soviet orphanage yet I’m watching this and internalizing everything.
In Egypt, the families that come from old money refer to themselves as ‘known families’. And yes, Anna’s description fits the bill. Heritage, longevity, tradition, and the family name is important within this circle.
Yes, I have heard this one "he/she comes from a well known family" or something like that.
Does Anna have a lesson on dressing casual but still looking Elegant?? Cos I feel most people need it.
COS agree! I wear COS blouses in my first three videos.
Dress for your goal; daily; @ dawn
I believe that Clever & Chic has just the right video
She does have a video on casual elegance and lounge wear 🙂
I'm not hating but I don't think fashion is Anna's main strength. I think she's better on topics like etiquette etc.
My auntie is a countess. she is stylish, has a 'light' footprint ( eats lightly, travels lightly and is not imposing) but she is a collector experiences and is incredibly eccentric. Confidence is not an issue.
Ironic how old money rules of “practicing subtleness” when it comes to dressing somehow seem so humble & discrete. I find that more “inclusive” than the giant logos. Ability to put elegant & very tasteful outfit, simple yet very chic, reflecting your own aesthetic - I prefer that to flashy logos, any day. :)
Me too!
Yesss people try to dress old money that love logos sometimes, and it just doesn’t work
Agreed!
I'm gonna be honest.....I'm American and I LOVE flashy logos and colors lol. You should see my hair right now! ✅ I love to be me
@@lorettaknoelk3475 And you should! A lot of these old money stereotypes are B.S. Plenty of old money is flashy. A lot of billionaires are absolutely flashy. Be who you are and the rest will follow. On youtube, that chic maven has clothes that are filled with logos and she always looks absolutely classy and carries herself well. I dress very basically, have a shaved head, and just carry and articulate myself well. Your individuality attracts people, not pretending to be someone you're not. Wear your logos and live your life.
I really admire old money women who are always simply dressed and although they have plenty of expensive jewelries you never see them wearing them. When i went to school the old money kids nearly never wear brands on the contrary the upper middle class was obsessed with brand clothes and branging about the prices they have paid. Old money people appreciate more your education, specially the classic style , history, poetry, ancient philosophy, than the clothes you wear.
As someone who was obsessed with the "old money lifestyle" as a teenager(I'm 31 now) coming from a lower middle class family, I'm guilty of rediscovering this mindset. While I admit that I fell into the fashion again, quick and hard, the first thing I did was opened my etiquette book for what have I forgotten, took out my piano that I haven't touched in years and started taking French lessons that I never got my B level in. As for clothes I went on Vinted and slowly but surely collecting pieces that are natural materials, well-made and will last me for years. I have to say, thank you for humbling your audience and reminding me what the true values are - money or not.
Kate Middleton is in no way old money or even family money. She is descended from coal miners. Her parents were middle class until their online party favours business took off. She has done a wonderful job of levelling up job, and this enabled her to marry into royalty.
I worked closely with a "new money" family for a while. They were disrespectful to waiting staff, rude to people deemed beneath themselves and unpleasant in general because they believed they were all powerful now they'd gained access to higher living. Thoroughly horrible folk.
I come from disinherited old money. My grandmother inadvertently married a "commoner" who turned out to already have a wife in Canada and did not tell her! It scandalized my rather Catholic, conservative family who were very old money. My mother grew up mostly with her grandmother who was from very old German industrial money. My mom always seemed strange to me, compared to other people's mothers, who did not obsess over manners, comment on their boyfriend's "poor breeding", or refuse to let me buy branded or polyester clothing (in the 70's revival of the late 90's, no less). She was always forcing us to annunciate and was a stickler about bad grammar. Table manners were a big deal. We couldn't go out to breakfast without her barking at us to sit up straight and keep our elbows off the tables! She seemed to always have wealthy friends, even though we were solidly middle class (and sometimes that was questionable). She did her best to insert us into a wide variety of social circumstances and teach us to interact with whomever, whenever. There were always books about various things (sailing, piloting manuals for planes (she was single-engine licensed), philosophy, gardening, history, cooking... you name it) on our large bookshelf. When we got bored, we would pick from it.
She never dressed flashy or untoward-- she was always impossibly classical in her manner of dress. Never overdid the makeup. Never did hair dyes or anything. Very natural. Did not spring immediately for the latest thing (It took ages for her to consider buying us a DVD player). Preferred antiques and classic styles to new furniture. Never drove brand new, flashy cars, even though she probably could have. She drove a classic, older Jaguar. Never wore anything branded as far as I can remember-- save a little polo horse peeking up off of her shirts. But, her grooming, skin, and demeanor were always immaculate. It was rare to find her speaking negatively of other people, and she was always subtle when she didn't like someone. Despite this, she was very decisive and had shrewd tendencies. She was an excellent businesswoman, and all of her children, with the exception of one, are now business owners.
Looking back, I see clearly that she passed down this gift of perspective. I've worked with old money elites and new money alike, in my job, and I never felt remotely insecure. I've always felt completely at eye level with everyone, whether they be homeless or live on an estate. Never struggled with what spoon to use, nor lacked the words to say what needed to be said.
My dealings with old money have been mixed. There is very much a "Picture of Dorian Gray" side to it all. I think New Money is all out in front, and on display. It leaves nothing to the imagination. And in that respect, I trust them more than I trust old money-- which is incredibly jealous of its social station and material standing-- to the extent that it can cause a hatred for the average-heeled individual that is usually carefully concealed behind their finishing school veneers. I've had to witness it first-hand, and it is tremendously ugly-- moreso than the garish logo slaves of New Money. That being said, I appreciate their value system quite a lot.
A university education is the most consistent thing about the Old Money community. This allows them to really understand their history and culture and be at home with other people. Of course, it also doubles your lifetime earnings. Give yourself this precious lifelong gift before anything else. It can take a lot of hard work and sacrifice for those without any wealth, but there is a lot of financial support available. Without a college degree, one is rarely ever able to get to that level of not having to stress about money that is such a joy-killer. Marriage, children, and improving fashion and lifestyle can wait, get your degree first, it just gets harder as one gets older and has more responsibilities. Also, it’s never to late to start or resume your degree.
Depends on the degree and who you know. Many degrees lean into middle management mindsets. If you can intern at a good place and make good contacts it increases your chances of moving up. Student loan debts is a serious burden to many
It’s more about useful skills and degrees than useless degrees, my dad always put emphasis on STEM subjects or learning a Trade.
I studied at Oxford as an undergraduate. Fortunately I was at a college with people from diverse backgrounds. The unfortunate truth is that most old money people are arrogant as hell and get far in life due to privilege and confidence not ability, and look down on those who haven't had the same privileges. No matter how much money I have, I would not want my child going to one of these schools or universities.
I’m not from old money but I do have privilege. Never act lesser than, you had/have as much of a right to be there as anyone. Second, it all comes down to upbringing. I grew up with nannies and private school and my siblings went to school with teens who come to school with lambos and Ducatis but because we were raised in a certain way we don’t treat anyone any differently. This has allowed me to act in a nonchalant manner around various dignitaries as part of my job now.
Someone’s arrogance only affects me if I allow it. The power is mine. It’s a mindset for both parties. Most people in the upper echelon may feel entitled but if you pay them no mind, you’ll be respected.
No one cares lol
I always felt different compared to my peers. Wasn’t special but just different. My family and I grew up middle class but stressed the importance of education, as well as manners, etiquette, and being polite. They dressed us differently, always wrote thank you notes, always made guests feel hospitable at our house, etc. they were very picky about who are friends were. Now as I’m older, I appreciate it. I may not have a wealth of money but these stepping stones have give me a great career with potential, great style (classic always win), a reputation for being polite & well-mannered, and with a smaller group of different networks (because not everyone is polite, aware or as mannered- it actually filters out people that are more appropriate for your lifestyle and upbringing vs those who shamed my childhood bc of what my parents worked hard to give my sibling and I). Thank you, Anna for this wonderful video
Bless your parents for raising such a daughter as you!
I actually shop at antique shops and second hand stores just because I want furniture that is not made of cardboard and it's not going to fall apart before I even get it home 😱
I worked for a wealthy woman who had two children and I never saw her children wear designer anything. Her daughter's clothes came from Target. They definitely had old money and went to private schools.
Your description is spot on! Love this video!
Old money is good as long as is not tainted with blood. Unfortunately most of the old money in western Europe is tainted with blood. You should never feel like you are less than next to old money people especially in the uk here. If you make your money in a honest way, always hold your head high.
Agreed
I like that you mentioned “mindset” to refer to old-money. Actually old money is more of a mindset than amount of wealth, or money itself. You know inherited wealth gets divided very fast within 1 or two generations, between the heirs. It can disappears if the business doesn’t go as well in next generations. But what will remain for a few generations after that is the mindset. Of not bragging to the poor, of not being flashy, not being rude, not overspending. The culture, respect to education,etc, all these remain there for a longer time, even only one of the parents were old money by their ancestors.
Yes! And please talk about how lovely Julia Garner is in the role! She is such a classy lady.
You hit the nail on the head! Old money is all about the mindset.
So true!
100% accurate. my family is "old money," but my father squandered his upbringing by choosing a less-than-profitable career. nevertheless, the mentality permeated every aspect of my childhood. even though i grew up in a low-middle-class home, my paternal grandparents financed my private education, along with etiquette classes, ballet, music, and private tutoring. my parents and i only thrifted in rich neighborhoods so we could purchase quality pieces at a discounted price. like you said, the mentality follows even if the money is gone.
Exactly!
My Mother's family was old money. My Mother used to say she could tell new money from old money people in second. She also used to say " money can't buy class"
Being an old money is suffocating, one misstep you'll be the talk of the whole family. You don't have to classify yourself, just be yourself, be happy, be healthy, and respect others.
So true, why label oneself
Right on time Anna! Haha, I started dating an "old money" man recently. Military background... He told me his family's farm estate belonged to Anne of Cleves as part of her divorce settlement from Henry VIII. He currently rents his apartment in the city and keeps the thermostat mostly off as energy prices are soaring - but served Bollinger with *supper*, and boy oh boy did he have the softest bed sheets I'd ever touched 😂 Quality where it counts! Completely different breed.
I learnt something recently about money, before I didn’t have much very poor and when I made a little I didn’t care about the price of things my mindset was hey I worked hard so I deserve it. Now that we have more or we’re stable I don’t spend as much and I’m very mindful of how I spend it. I can say that now I see the value of things more that the price.
Spot on Anna. You will hear those with old money say this often "It's all about price to value ratio."
The furniture is so beautiful! For some reason it made me so happy to find out that it stays the same even as time passes.
Everything you say is so correct. People with new money are sometimes unkind with no gracefulness.
A close friend of mine is old money and her dad was also a finance CEO making £2,500 an hour consulting fee. They are multi-millionaires and her dad is the biggest penny pincher; when he shops, he calculates food at cost by 100g! However, they buy the best quality of everything when it comes to their home and lifestyle.
That is so ridiculous to count food prices if you had a lot of money.
Yes. Thanks for sharing that rich people are usually very polite, and are trained that way. People who are rude, and demanding because they have money is such a turn off. But your videos are always right on point!!!!! I enjoy your videos.
I used to live in the smallest studio apartment in the poshest part of a large city. I never saw flashy cars around. I’d see older Range Rovers, Volvos, Mercedes station wagons, etc. Luxury, but never flashy.
Another wonderful video, Anna! The first video I watched by you was 'Elegance Rules'. From that moment I was hooked!
What I truly appreciate about old money and enjoy practicing myself is investing in good quality and timelessness.
Apparently I'm old money, without even having money :D
Me too
Same
Thank you for sharing this. Everything you are saying is completely true. I’m from “old money” on my mother’s side (my dad’s family was “new money”), and my family was economical but shopped for quality and spent on education.
Wanted to add - my dad didn’t buy into the “new money mindset” because his parents were refugees who escaped Nazi Germany, and since they lost nearly everything in order to escape, they were very conservative with spending.
My dear Anna I can't wait to hear your advice. For some reason it feels like eternity since last Sunday that you uploaded a video! Looking forward to it 💖
I am so happy Anna that you made video on this topic because almost 800 people wanted watch video on this topic, thanks you🥰
By the way, the old money person I know allegedly told her best friend that she would not be caught dead wearing labels. So yeah you are right about that one too.
Well said!! Everything you speak of is so true!
I've seen wealthy people spend hours comparison shop just to make sure they are getting the best deal and value for their money. They're not frivolous or show off.
When they make a purchase they know they're planning on keeping it for a long time sometimes to a fault that's why their homes may look like a museum.
Wealthy people do tend to travel in small circles!
Charities are also a huge part of their lives. They make sure they are giving back to society generously!
Education is very important and its a main topic in their conversations. They stay versed on many subjects and travel often giving them opportunities to be exposed to the ways of the world.
Wealthy people understand their place in the world and their responsibility to give back. Of course there are exceptions to the rules but generally it doesn't stray far from basic ideas to how they live their lives.
It can be intimidating to be in their presence because they are definitely judging you!
If they are judging you they don't have good manners. Why an earth fear that kind of jerks. Money can't buy a class. That is good to remeber.
I feel old money are extremely strict and hardly leave room for change or new things ( which can be good as far as you know the limit). Anyway I love old money more and there are alot to learn from them.
Good Research! That's why we like you. You really teaches about elegance and the mindset of a higher level of living. We need that to appear better in higher class business circles so as not to embarress ourselves. Sending prayers of blessings your way. We love you, Anna.
Hi Susan
I love this video so much, Anna! ❤ I agree with everything with shared 100% and you have actually prompted me to reflect a lot about the topic of social circle and friendships with this video.
I received an elite education and as a result, I made my lifetime best friends there. And as you said, that stability in social circle isn't necessarily based on an exclusivity mindset, but in shared values.
We come from different parts of the world, but most of us do speak 3-5 languages, have a similar level of interest in foreign affairs, feel passionate about the same subjects and regularly discuss world events as part of what bonds us.
That has nothing to do with an exclusivity mindset, as you said, but with shared values, education and worldviews.
Thank you so much for this video. I have really enjoyed it and you have prompted me to reflect much!
This is a great breakdown of this culture! Being from a working class Boston family surrounded by old money, it can be tough to navigate that world. This book helped me so much too!
* Author: Byron Tully
The Old Money Book: Living Better While Spending Less - Secret's of America's Upper Class*
I just looked this up and he has one for women in particular too called Old Money New Woman
Love his Old Money book 🌸🙏🏽🎀
I love this community! I just got this look on audible and I'm loving it
Also from the Boston area! Small world :)
Thank you for book recommendation.
I am not old money, not even money, but I do have this type of mentality and I share lot of characteristic with them, especially in education area.
I completely share the values and way of thinking of “old money” people (which is so rare as I can notice in todays society), I also don’t like trends, I am focused on style and quality, but the only difference is that I dont have money heritage. :)
One of my dear family friends is from old money and is a well-respected citizen of my hometown. While he and his family donate massive amounts to the local university and to the prestigious law school where he graduated every year for scholarships (he and his family dress well (but don’t wear flashy clothing) and are highly educated and cultured), he prefers a basic car to a luxury one and likes McDonald’s coffee the best (and takes advantage of the senior discount!). He and his family are definitely among the sweetest people I have ever met and are absolutely down-to-earth. Not an iota of snobbishness!
Generally the rich are like this
Damn. It feels like I grew up in old money yet it was abject poverty. We never redecorated, clothes lasting for years... No heirlooms or safety nets though. The similarities of super rich and dirt poor are uncanny.
My dad definitely has the old money mindset! He has taught me to go for quality instead of buying something just because of the brand. When I buy new clothes I look mainly at the materials and sometimes it happens to be a well known brand, but that’s not the reason why I buy it. He puts a lot of money back into his business but also makes sure he and everyone in the family always have everything they need🙏🏼 he’s humble and works hard even though he technically doesn’t have to, it’s inspiring
Tnx to my grandparents at early age i was trained table manners and dos n donts...in my country my family is just above average ... elegannce comes from within its not just expendive cloths. Its the manner and education..how u act how u interact how u talk...cant explain but i know u get me...
Had an heiress to a famous company volunteer in my program. Very low profile, hard worker, dressed worse than me, and couldn’t have been nicer!
I had opportunity to travel in old mommy circle s in UK and USA. The concept of manners, discretion, understatement, and culture resonated with me and has remained with me over the years. Thank you for this video. It is spot on.
Hi 👋
I would listen to this subject of old money style forever. My favorite of all! Thank you!
I'm old money but middle class. My ancestors on my fathers side were extremely wealthy for many generations, but now there isn't that much left or what is left is part of a legal battle that never gets solved.
Same here, my ancestors were loaded but yeah lol doesn't matter now
Same. We are all over the place living regular lives. Even though we don't have the millions our parents had, we still have the mindset.
Same
I think we are some sort of cadet branch, example: my paternal grandmother grew up in a wealthy “hacendados” family (she was the niece of the patriarchy, he took her under his arm for protection) and all the money remains with legitimate descendants. But my granny and her sons kept some privileges like access to education, manners, lands and family reputation… just no big amounts of money.
Things that tell that you’re old money: actually coming from a wealthy family that has passed down that wealth for at least a couple of generations. Old Money isn’t a stereotype rooted in your attire or comportment, it’s a socioeconomic reality irrespective of how you dress or act.
Thank you for this. I've grown weary of telling folks who comment on tik tok old money aesthetic videos that most of the time, OM do not spend lavishly.
I've even had someone claim that frugality is not a sign of old money...
The mentality "us against them" comes from the desire to stick with people who think and act like them, people who understand them and would be able to make conversation with them on topics which only their circle would know or understand.
Actually a lot of new money people look down on old money people without knowing that they are rich just because old money people usually don't show off. New money people often come to very wrong conclusions because they don't conceive the idea that a rich person would dress in a simple manner or would lead a relatively frugal life (average cars, average clothes, using public transport etc...). Maybe the only unambiguous sign of wealth you see in old money people is their house, but obviously it's not something you see immediately when you meet someone.
Thanks to your videos, I am engaged to a HV man from a wonderful family. The first time they invited me on a family trip to Italy, we immediately put my son in etiquette school. That was a few years ago, and he still proudly implements everything he learned on a daily basis. It really created a strong value within him that he cherishes.
That’s so wonderful!
Hello Anna-love, great presentation on this subject. I've learned these exact same points in protocol courses I've taken for my job. Your information is really helpful and presented in a digestible, entertaining manner. Love your channel and appreciate all your offer here :🌹
Integrity + Wisdom = Power. Trust, loyalty, principles and values. As within, so without. Things of the heart and things of the spirit ⚖
I was invited to go to a private club in Philadelphia as a guest. I didn't know what it was going to be, but the atmosphere of old money hit me like a sack of bricks, it was so different from the social circles I'm used to. I was honestly intimidated, not going to lie.
I love timeless clothing (even though my dad keeps telling me to get xyz because it’s in fashion- I don’t listen most of the time), I love to read, I love history, I love certain antiques/antique furniture, I love certain art (and took art as a GCSE), I love music (especially classical music) & the theatre ( I went to stage school & took drama as a GCSE). I think I’d get along well with old money people. My parents brought my up to appreciate things like time team, the antiques roadshow, documentaries, the repair shop and other similar shows. My mum taught me about proper grammar & conversation. I try to be my best on the little money I have.
I love the look of old money furniture. Tuft leather couches, the deep dark wood, it's all gorgeous. I also love the way they dress. I guess that's why when I took your quiz I came up as classic elegant. 😊
Great informative video! One thing I would add is, even though people coming from “old money” don’t feel the need to prove themselves to the outside world, they do feel tremendous pressure within their families to keep us with a level of excellence expected of them.
¡Yeah! I’m not old money but my paternal granny family it was. They are like “my son attended X university” “my daughter marries a proper man” “I have a long term friendship with X intellectual/politics personality”. Actually, is a little bit disgusting and exhausting because every single reunion with them is impregnated with old fashioned conversations.
Dear Anna, today I finished SOTEW. I feel very empowered! Your program is amazing and so worth it. Thank you!
Just realized I was raised “old money” without the money, lol!
I'm an Indian and it was totally new for me ....I always learn new things from uh not just elegance 💕
Thankyou my dear elegant Ana❤️
This has really made me laugh, I’m 5th generation “old money” we’re actually a little mean with money because it’s been instilled into us from such a young age, don’t be surprised to find “old money” ppl wearing vintage & second hand clothes… we were doing that before it was on trend 🤭 we’re slightly eccentric, and yes really aren’t bothered about ppl looking down on us, we actually find it extremely funny… you’ve honestly got this so factual!
i was thinking the same! my husband and I were dna'd old money methods growing up by old money people and have gotten that question a couple of times..., "are you old money? how much money do you actually have that you can do this?" whatever _this_ is. we're passing the methods on to our nieces and nephews.
My husband’s family is old money from France. Im American “no money”. My dad was a NYC police officer.
My mother, however, was obsessed with the old money ilk. And so she instilled in us (5) the power of stellar manners And dressing very well (classic) on a dime. I receive many compliments on my office attire and am very cautious to stick to classic clothing. As an aside,, im older (66) and get very upset when I see women my age dress matronly. There is no need to give up on your looks as you age. There is no need to dress in “old lady” baggy capris and boxy shirts. You can keep it simple and elegant.
That being said, my husband’s family has been great to me. In fact, my husband says that at times, I am more French than American. ( i.e. when we are in his country and my good manners and respectfulness is displaying) you would be shocked at the loud and obnoxious behavior of SOME Americans. Its not a pretty sight.
@@Atypical60 haha...'no money'... That's so funny because it's so relatable.
But being classy on a dime is great. That's what my mom taught too. And good manners...
As for our mom, it's us daughters who encouraged her to dress better especially as she ages.
Rich people makes average ppl feel special or something when they use your clothes and make it a trend or become trend, the power
I love that old money are discreet people that will not make a scene in public or create embarassing situations. The fact that they are also respectful of others makes a difference. They set the example of appropriate behavior most of the time.
Thank you for making this video, I really appreciate it because I got to notice many things. Now I understand the intentions my grandmother and father had despite not being rich by any means. Family history, etiquette, manners, education…everything now makes sense, they would always talk about those things in an attempt to teach us. I guess that’s where family pride comes from and I never noticed it. I’m pleasantly surprised.
Hi Anna, I have never commented any of your video but when I saw the title I felt curiosity.... I come from what you call an "old money" aristocratic spanish family and I can confirm almost everything you said. In my childhood I was teached to always think, do, go... what "WE" do. As you said, sense of community and feeling of "us versus them" are very deeply rooted, old money grow and live segregated in a world where they don't actually see other kinds of realities.
But now Anna, I am an adult and I can tell you that old money sense of community has also a dark side... you must be strictly compliant with the community standards otherwise you will be looked down and in some cases excluded.... you must be composed, calm and never show your feelings even if inside you want to cry or scream... you must..., you must... I could continue for hours.
Also, old money are always polite and kind to "normal" people but attention: most of them will never enter in an intimate love or friendship relationship with a normal person. Because in their mentality, sadly, is "us versus them".
Every community has its dark side.
I remember my dad taking me on an economy class train ride just before I started undergrad, just to make me realize what I have and how much I should appreciate it. And yes my friend’s dad was ousted from the community because he spoke up against things and didn’t continue with their family business, which was actually an empire. It’s all gone because her dad became a scientist and so did she. I think we are all doing great. The values and principles are what we carry forward. Money can always be rebuilt even if you are cut off from family money.
Based on your description of “old money” lifestyle I think it sounds kind of sad.
Oh my gosh yes. If you show off everything to people you give the impression that you are not used to having those things and they are driving you crazy
She explains these points without prejudice and very on point.
I’m of an old money mindset from birth. My parents have always sought to pass on something as a family heirloom.
Wow, I just realized, I was brought up by Old Money parents, but only without inheritance. Lol. We had before, but dad’s siblings wanted to have their inheritance money so majority decided to sell my grandparents properties. It was the most heartbreaking phase in my life. Now we are back to square one, and trying to live in more peaceful life.
My parents once said, Education is the only inheritance they will give us, and our future will depend on us. It is true that Old Money people tend give more values in quality, education, life lessons, and cultural preservations. Not everything is about luxury and money.
Not all old money are polite, trust me I’m from NYC and have met plenty. Some have been famous families , the elderly and teenagers are usually rude or snobbish . The nicest are between ages 25-40
My fathers family is pretty old money. At home we learned all the etiquette concerning many things. Also that money mindset is in the familie. After about 30 years he finally bought a new sofa set. But then of super quality. But still going on a bike to a shop if it was cheaper at the other side of the city. He always helped other people with technical issues in the street. He did not like the neighbourhood where he lived because he wanted to live in the better neighbourhood were he came from but he knew that you must keep your wife happy. The money was build with having a big laundry factory and several high end building buildings. Even last week my mother (85) told me not to buy what you do not need. Most money is put in shares. And still my mother hardly spends money and is happy when she sav es some. So, do normal and be polite, do not buy useless things, invest and enjoy your live. Once my father asked: do i look poor? Then i answered: hmmm, you could buy some up to date clothes. He was not so interested in it. Only if you saw his watch, you knew he was not poor. My aunt is still there and she is also well educated and sophisticated, very chique and polite. Mostly i like a good chat with a worker more then with the stiffer people. That's all, folks.
Enjoying to hear you every time! Thank you, Anna. So interesting to know about features and habits of the high level of life people, and what things they pay attention to. Id like to know more about it. My point of view, if you level up your quality of life you make the world better. Want to make things better - start with yourself. Most of these points can do every one of us to be the best version of ourselves. These comments are important not only for 'old money. Wonderful video, nice to see you again.
Thank you so much for making me realize I am actually "old money". Even though some of us try hard to look/ behave differently because the pressure of living up to ones ancestors, or simply keeping the family inheritance is actually very hard to handle as a teen ...
My dad grew up with wealthy uncles and spent his whole life (from what I've seen) studying how to become old money wealthy and often taught me to buy the cheapest you can and save as much as you can so I grew up with poor items. Unfortunately, he was terrible at saving and invested poorly and subsequently doesn't have anything to pass on to us. However, I was able to marry a sweet man who had good examples of what to do and what not to do and who came from a slightly similar upbringing so together we are elevating our lives and looking forward to passing on to our next generation. So thankful for all the advice and tips you share. Your channel was exactly what I was looking for many years ago when I found you and I'm so grateful to keep learning from you and growing in elegance. ❤️
I LOVE these kinds of videos with new money and old money😍 please do more of those✨
Love this. You are so classy. I despise people who splash around their money as if I should be impressed, but I think the ones flaunting their lifestyles, especially youtubers are just tacky
I once had a relationship with a person who went to boarding school at Ardingly. He said no one was interested in wearing designer trainers. This is very different to state school children that often want and feel the need to feel accepted by each other through wearing certain brands.
I really do love the old money concept,i was raised to with old money so what you're saying is so relatable
I come from a somewhat wealth family from my dad side and this is super relatable. Aside the issues my dad had that made him lose a lot and we arent super rich people anymore, my granddad, dad and everyone from his family has this thought "I wont spend thousands on this superficial thing, I have a family to leave heritage." And they literally leave it. We have a farm that has been up and working from hundreds of years and this assures me that I know if something goes wrong on my own financial life, I have my place, I have my safety to help me survive. I rather a simple comfortable life than a lavish one that will end at some point. I want my kids and their kids to be safe as I was.
A tailor, yes!
Especially if you love shopping at boutiques, a tailor is an affordable way to afford "luxury" clothing.
I giggled when you said old money clothes wearing that classic pullover. You look beautiful.
Very accurate, I think its also important to mention disinheritance since that is something relevant here. A suggestion to include in another video. You definitely do have certain expectations on you however there are repercussions for family "embarrassment"
What I like most about old money is their knowledge of literature, art, music, etc. Those things interest me and I would love to have their education in these areas. I'm knowledgable about literature, because that's my college education, but the only education I've had in the other things is an art appreciation course and a course in classical music. I'm grateful that I have that much.
This has been very interesting. Thank you, Anna.
xo~linda
One of the valuable session.. These factors are widely accepted by old money people around the world..Even I have noticed these factors people around me.. good job Anna..
Me my self educated middle class, I always avoid to be in contact with the new money. People I met craves attention and ask rude personal questions + talking about their accomplishments like no one else
The outfit of this video + pearls.. So appropriate for the video. Love it 👌🏻
Thank you
RUclips recommended your channel to me, and I'm so glad. I am an English teacher in Houston, Texas, so definitely neither new nor old money. But I do like to buy little things for myself and carry myself in a way that conveys the level of stability that I do have. You are so right about quality over quantity. A few designer slacks and blazers and heels that I can mix and match are a game changer. I am also fortunate to live in River Oaks, where I get to be around lots of old money, and they really do adhere to all these rules. On a related note: I was tickled to find out after checking out your website that you are, indeed, Swedish! I could hear it in your accent. I am ethnically Swedish and lived in Gothenburg for a year. Tack för din härliga kanal och allt du gör!