I am so thankful you are educating parents on how foolish they can be and how easily their addict children manipulate them just to get their fix. Giving cash to an addict is like going and buying their drugs for them. Thank God for the meeting and the counselor who spoke TRUTH to you.
You're a great mom. It's the hardest thing in life to tell our children NO! Keep up the good work and thank you for sharing and helping save our children. Even if they are adults.
My grandparents raised me and almost loved me to death too. Being put away where they couldnt help me is the only thing that saved my life! I had to experience helplessness to want to change. I went the opposite with my kids, any trouble they get into, they have to pay the consequences. I can say, they definately didnt go out and do the things I did. My grandmother has obe remaining son in his 70s, she still enabling him. It happens to the very best parents too.
This is a powerful video, full of truth and honesty. Me: recent widow of a long time substance user, it took him all the way to an artificial heart and all the things that come along with that. When he became so weak and couldn’t use his hands or sit up, he was shocked . . . He made the decision and is no longer on this earth. I’m 66, and there is a big wonderful world out there. Relief at last. Sounds cold, I’m a warm loving women, dealing with the addiction almost took that away from me. Pray
I so wish the parents of every addict could hear this message. One of my oldest friends had two children. She lost both due to addiction. She is now having to live with the realization that she loved them to death. It is sad to see how she lives now. She has completely shut down and is pitiful.
It is very hard for most parents to show tough love. Many years of counseling for myself to help me recognize that too much love is not necessarily a good thing. I am doing this because this is how much I love you. Tough Love. Couple this with positivity, solutions, honesty, and it shows support.
Thank you for today's video. My situation is the same. He isn't addicted to a substance but is extremely mentally ill. We're going through all the same problems and I'm tired of being the enabler.
I apologize for my comment. It’s a real sore subject with me. My son tells everyone that’s when his started, but he was well into his alcohol addiction before that. I also have a niece that uses the opiates a dentist gave her. Both are alcoholics not even opiate addicts. I am a physician and I did not over prescribe pain pills. But it does make it difficult to prescribe opiates when needed. I have watched all you you-tube videos. Liked and shared:). I really had not heard that information before I saw your short video. It was a knees jerk reaction and again I am sorry! I would never think you would lie or I would not be such a big fan. Just dealing with a lot of should not have lashed out! Keep up the good work!!!!
Hello, At first you are TRICKED and then one day you actually HEAR and SEE it for what it is ! My brother was the BEST at trickery and still is, but I’ve gotten WAY better at seeing it coming a mile away most days. Love your videos Missy 🙌🙏 Take Care 🌸🌼
I'm not either it's a full time job it's not your fault it gets on your nerves and it's ok to feed them in things like that but bring them t your home and feed them food from your home just give them some grace that's all you can do my motto is get yourself out of jail cause my kids are driving me crazy nearly 30 years old
This is such a powerful video. It needs to be seen by every parent. I too was an enabler. Now I have cut off all communication. And for now, I am safe, with custody of my granddaughter. The abuse has stopped. I am reclaiming my life..I am free. No is a powerful word. I should have used it sooner.
Took me 20 years to say you have to leave. Your behavior towards us and the kids is horrible. It is not good for us to have to live with the meth fits the hearing and seeing people who are not there. Talking to people who are not there. Threatening to burn the house down with us in it. We put her in for a 72 hr hold for mental health. She was in mental hospital for a month. She lied to the doctor that, she didn't hear the voices anymore. Doctor said this happens with meth use. If. She doesn't stop using meth it can become permanent. I set it up for her to go to rehab 3 hrs from us. She stayed but left. She was suppose to have stayed for a year. Relapsed. I wish I was stronger when she was younger but, I wasn't. I have to put the mental and physical well-being of the kids and ourselves.
I learned how to handle and survive my addict ex-husband. Now his sons. I went to Alanon and AA, an alcoholism counseling course. I say, AA and AlAnon. I don't think Alanon is strong enough alone, as people get well and leave. In AA they stay and share their experience, strength, and hope. You just go to open AA meetings, as you don't have to be an addict to go. NA also uses AA for support. Those 12 steps are for everyone, then you can share your experience, strength, and hope with others struggling the same.
I am presuming Joseph is back into his addiction. So sorry to hear that for you, Paps and Aden. What does his wife do when he is doing drugs. Is she on drugs too? If not can’t she let you know what he is up to! Ya’ll are in my prayers.
My grandson is having issues with addiction. He is in Juvenile right now because he got into trouble while on probation. His dad,my son,is divorced for 10 years from his mom. I am going to try and persuade him to watch this video. He is such an enabler not only to this son but all his children. He cannot say no to anything😟??? I sure hope your son is doing ok!! Bless your heart for telling us your story you are helping and possibly saving lives. Sending my love and prayers for you and your family. 🙏
I do the same thing with my 41 yr old son. He's doesn't care about priorities in his life . I know he isn't on drugs ,he has depression and won't do anything about it. He's been in jail for back child support for his 15 year old son . He works at these temporary jobs. No insurance or anything. He's living with my daughter now and I don't like it . He owes me like $150 right now. I feel like you do about helping him . He lived with us and my husband wanted me to throw him out . We fought for along time about that I refuse to do that. Well I think we live and learn 😊
Ican relate to this,Ive seen my two brothers ive lost from addiction do this to my MoMA so so many times, Even im guilty of my alcohol abuse a time or two😢But deep down my mother knew what it was for,She always gave them the money on up until they were gone , maybe a few times she would say no , Sometimes she believed it was for groceries, cigarettes,or what not
You are so right. How would you ever live with yourself knowing that the little bit of money you gave your addict child was the money that bought the drug he or she overdoses on. A parent can never get over that. It's one of the most difficult things a parent can ever go through having a child who's an addict. Having to recondition yourself to show love by withholding what your child begs for and says they need. You have to completely change your whole instinct for parenting.
Missy I want to tell you something give yourself some grace as a mom that was an addict and tried to commit suicide Noone is perfect but I do know this my huspand overdosed on meth and I'm hell bent on not getting my kids out of jail there daddy's momma didn't give two shits about him beat the hell out of him worked him like a mule she had 8 kids his dad and the rest of his family got him started on meth at the age of 13 it has did a loop a huge loop I looked death in Steven's death in his eyes and seen the same death in my sons eyes it nearly killed me my daughter was with an idiot that pimped her out I stayed in there house for a long time trying to protect her she doesn't even realize it that huspand is dead to she's been married 3 times lost her baby to death they want nothing to do with me I've fought for them tooth and nail and I hate to say this but I hate them for disrespecting them I don't know what to do maybe I'm just not there
Missy I wish every parent could see this video. I was that parent. Any time he said he needed money I was there It came to the point where I was hiding it from his dad. NO is the hardest word you will ever say. Missy like you I have heard every story. And they can still from their babies and not think a thing of it.And i always said they can still from you and you looking at them. Great video.
Ur so bang on missy l can relate to u in everything God knows what lve gone through death in the end 22yrs old beautiful son piece me gone forever hope u get a end result as gòd wouldn't wish losing a child in the end l died with him rip lve one son left God willing my son now God protect him and keep him safe God bless missy good luck hope u never get that call God forbid keep talking girl well made video it's mentally in every way destroys u
Yes I'm definitely guilty of loving my son to death except he got in trouble and went to prison not because he was a bad person he is a recovering addict, he pulled 6 years but now he is doing great Thank God even though that was so hard onus all he got off drugs and I Pray he stays clean 1 day at a time 😢
Sending so much love to everyone having a hard time. I also pray you feel a sense of calm and the peace of Jesus. 🫂💙 "My peace I give unto you, I do not give to you as the world gives. Let not your heart be troubled nor let it be afraid." -John 14:27
I was told onetime that you are not dealing with your child. You are dealing with the drugs. They will tell you anything to get what they want. I finally gave up and I told them I was done and that it was between them and their God. I still love but I don;t like.
Everyone’s walk is different. I for one is in a no contact situation rt now with one of my sons( he’s wishes) I chose not to dance to his tunes like my ex husband does, therefore im useless to him. The pain I feel? Is deep, I gave it to God all mighty as soon as I felt where this was all going? ( mother’s intuition they call it?) He is a successful businessman but closet user. I refuse to have any part of him using me as a puppet any longer and he caught on to it. So he cancelled me. Does it hurt? YES! Do I have to live with what happens from here on out? YES. I love him the same as I love my other 2 but I’ve been through enough to last me a lifetime so I pray a looot. God has the wheel with my son.
Everything you have said, I've done. I've had every e xcuse there is from my son for money. I love my son deeply but also hate the person he is. He has multiple addictions, drugs, and his drink of choice - rum, gambling, and women... As a mother, it's so hard to watch and go through the deconstruction that he causes. One by one, family members are getting tired and sick of his little outbursts. I'm seeking counselling for myself, but at present, it's not doing much good. We parents just have to hope and pray that one day they will change. Sending positive energy to you and your family ❤
Hi MIssy, I remember you saying that your son who is the addict was not your biological son. He may have Reactive attachment disorder, which means that he has had issues with bonding with you as a maternal mother. If this is true, does he ever see his maternal mother ? Just wondering. Our youngest son is adopted, and even thought we adopted him at 4 months old, he went through this stage. They love you, but at the same time can do actions that harm you (like selling your jewelry). Just a thought ...
I did read her comment and I even responded to her. Yes, I probably did fall for every excuse, but you know what, I cleaned up my mistakes and I learned from my experiences. That's all I'm going to say on that subject
Just saw your short on addiction. First I heard of shoulder surgery and doc giving him pain meds. I don’t like you blaming others for his addiction! Have watched all your videos never heard you say it was docs fault for prescription drug over subscription! My son broke his leg and shoulder during football that required surgery in high school. We got him off subscription painkillers after 10 days. Went to Tylenol and Advil. His doc was trying to help him with his pain. Now being blamed for a 14 year plus addiction.
First of all, I don't blame his addiction on anyone but him! Second of all, I talked about how his addiction started in my very 1st video on this topic over a year ago. Third of all, I really don't like being called a liar. You've clearly NOT watched all my videos if you've never heard me talk about this. And lastly, you need to check yourself before you call me out like this when I've done nothing but be open, honest and kind
I am so thankful you are educating parents on how foolish they can be and how easily their addict children manipulate them just to get their fix. Giving cash to an addict is like going and buying their drugs for them. Thank God for the meeting and the counselor who spoke TRUTH to you.
You're a great mom. It's the hardest thing in life to tell our children NO! Keep up the good work and thank you for sharing and helping save our children. Even if they are adults.
💜
My grandparents raised me and almost loved me to death too. Being put away where they couldnt help me is the only thing that saved my life! I had to experience helplessness to want to change. I went the opposite with my kids, any trouble they get into, they have to pay the consequences. I can say, they definately didnt go out and do the things I did. My grandmother has obe remaining son in his 70s, she still enabling him. It happens to the very best parents too.
This is a powerful video, full of truth and honesty. Me: recent widow of a long time substance user, it took him all the way to an artificial heart and all the things that come along with that. When he became so weak and couldn’t use his hands or sit up, he was shocked . . . He made the decision and is no longer on this earth. I’m 66, and there is a big wonderful world out there. Relief at last. Sounds cold, I’m a warm loving women, dealing with the addiction almost took that away from me. Pray
Bless your heart! I know you went through a lot dealing with that
I so wish the parents of every addict could hear this message. One of my oldest friends had two children. She lost both due to addiction. She is now having to live with the realization that she loved them to death. It is sad to see how she lives now. She has completely shut down and is pitiful.
Oh bless her heart! That tears me up 😭
It is very hard for most parents to show tough love. Many years of counseling for myself to help me recognize that too much love is not necessarily a good thing. I am doing this because this is how much I love you. Tough Love. Couple this with positivity, solutions, honesty, and it shows support.
Very well said 👏 💜
Thank you for today's video. My situation is the same. He isn't addicted to a substance but is extremely mentally ill. We're going through all the same problems and I'm tired of being the enabler.
Hugs, Miss Anne 💜💜
Your son is very blessed to have a mom like you!
Thank you so much for the kind words 💜
@@FromtheHoller you’re most welcome 🫶🤗
I apologize for my comment. It’s a real sore subject with me. My son tells everyone that’s when his started, but he was well into his alcohol addiction before that. I also have a niece that uses the opiates a dentist gave her. Both are alcoholics not even opiate addicts. I am a physician and I did not over prescribe pain pills. But it does make it difficult to prescribe opiates when needed. I have watched all you you-tube videos. Liked and shared:). I really had not heard that information before I saw your short video. It was a knees jerk reaction and again I am sorry! I would never think you would lie or I would not be such a big fan. Just dealing with a lot of should not have lashed out! Keep up the good work!!!!
Thank you, Miss Donna! I appreciate that and you 💜💜💜
Hello,
At first you are TRICKED and then one day you actually HEAR and SEE it for what it is !
My brother was the BEST at trickery and still is, but I’ve gotten WAY better at seeing it coming a mile away most days.
Love your videos Missy 🙌🙏
Take Care 🌸🌼
Yes! That's a great analogy for it!! Thank you, Miss Carol 😘 ❤️
You are such a gem. Praying for you 🙏❤️🦋
I'll take all the prayers I can get! 💜💜💜
I'm not either it's a full time job it's not your fault it gets on your nerves and it's ok to feed them in things like that but bring them t your home and feed them food from your home just give them some grace that's all you can do my motto is get yourself out of jail cause my kids are driving me crazy nearly 30 years old
This is such a powerful video. It needs to be seen by every parent. I too was an enabler. Now I have cut off all communication. And for now, I am safe, with custody of my granddaughter. The abuse has stopped. I am reclaiming my life..I am free. No is a powerful word. I should have used it sooner.
I feel every word you said. I wish I could turn back time and change several things so I could find peace a lot sooner than I did
Took me 20 years to say you have to leave. Your behavior towards us and the kids is horrible. It is not good for us to have to live with the meth fits the hearing and seeing people who are not there. Talking to people who are not there. Threatening to burn the house down with us in it. We put her in for a 72 hr hold for mental health. She was in mental hospital for a month. She lied to the doctor that, she didn't hear the voices anymore. Doctor said this happens with meth use. If. She doesn't stop using meth it can become permanent. I set it up for her to go to rehab 3 hrs from us. She stayed but left. She was suppose to have stayed for a year. Relapsed. I wish I was stronger when she was younger but, I wasn't. I have to put the mental and physical well-being of the kids and ourselves.
I learned how to handle and survive my addict ex-husband. Now his sons. I went to Alanon and AA, an alcoholism counseling course. I say, AA and AlAnon. I don't think Alanon is strong enough alone, as people get well and leave. In AA they stay and share their experience, strength, and hope. You just go to open AA meetings, as you don't have to be an addict to go. NA also uses AA for support. Those 12 steps are for everyone, then you can share your experience, strength, and hope with others struggling the same.
I am presuming Joseph is back into his addiction. So sorry to hear that for you, Paps and Aden. What does his wife do when he is doing drugs. Is she on drugs too? If not can’t she let you know what he is up to! Ya’ll are in my prayers.
He did relapse a few weeks ago but as far as I know he's working on getting his stuff back together. Praying that's the case! 💜
My grandson is having issues with addiction. He is in Juvenile right now because he got into trouble while on probation. His dad,my son,is divorced for 10 years from his mom. I am going to try and persuade him to watch this video. He is such an enabler not only to this son but all his children. He cannot say no to anything😟??? I sure hope your son is doing ok!! Bless your heart for telling us your story you are helping and possibly saving lives. Sending my love and prayers for you and your family. 🙏
We all have to learn the word no❤
And be firm with it. That was my hardest thing
Mine too Missy❤️
@tammyhalderman2031 💜💜
My mom was a psych nurse and she still almost did. Don’t blame yourself
I do the same thing with my 41 yr old son.
He's doesn't care about priorities in his life .
I know he isn't on drugs ,he has depression and won't do anything about it.
He's been in jail for back child support for his 15 year old son .
He works at these temporary jobs. No insurance or anything.
He's living with my daughter now and I don't like it .
He owes me like $150 right now.
I feel like you do about helping him .
He lived with us and my husband wanted me to throw him out .
We fought for along time about that
I refuse to do that.
Well I think we live and learn 😊
💜💜💜
Ican relate to this,Ive seen my two brothers ive lost from addiction do this to my MoMA so so many times, Even im guilty of my alcohol abuse a time or two😢But deep down my mother knew what it was for,She always gave them the money on up until they were gone , maybe a few times she would say no , Sometimes she believed it was for groceries, cigarettes,or what not
Thank you, sweet friend 🧡
@@FromtheHoller your welcome hope you have a happy Sunday
You are so right. How would you ever live with yourself knowing that the little bit of money you gave your addict child was the money that bought the drug he or she overdoses on. A parent can never get over that. It's one of the most difficult things a parent can ever go through having a child who's an addict. Having to recondition yourself to show love by withholding what your child begs for and says they need. You have to completely change your whole instinct for parenting.
It's not a natural way of parenting and feels horrible
Unfortunately love does not cure drug addiction.
Amen
It's not only a parent's it's siblings too I was one for my brother I thought at 1st our parents was doing wrong by not helping him
Very true! I don't think my other kids ever felt that. They went straight to anger
@@FromtheHoller it was just the 2 of us but after I seen what was going on I finally had to stop.
@JillBuck-gv3iv I understand and probably would've felt the same
Missy I want to tell you something give yourself some grace as a mom that was an addict and tried to commit suicide Noone is perfect but I do know this my huspand overdosed on meth and I'm hell bent on not getting my kids out of jail there daddy's momma didn't give two shits about him beat the hell out of him worked him like a mule she had 8 kids his dad and the rest of his family got him started on meth at the age of 13 it has did a loop a huge loop I looked death in Steven's death in his eyes and seen the same death in my sons eyes it nearly killed me my daughter was with an idiot that pimped her out I stayed in there house for a long time trying to protect her she doesn't even realize it that huspand is dead to she's been married 3 times lost her baby to death they want nothing to do with me I've fought for them tooth and nail and I hate to say this but I hate them for disrespecting them I don't know what to do maybe I'm just not there
Thank You ❤❤❤😊
Missy I wish every parent could see this video. I was that parent. Any time he said he needed money I was there
It came to the point where I was hiding it from his dad. NO is the hardest word you will ever say. Missy like you I have heard every story.
And they can still from their babies and not think a thing of it.And i always said they can still from you and you looking at them. Great video.
💜😘
I am sorry you had to go through this to prepare parents but your journey is pricelessto your viewers.
Thank you for your support 💜💜💜
Ur so bang on missy l can relate to u in everything God knows what lve gone through death in the end 22yrs old beautiful son piece me gone forever hope u get a end result as gòd wouldn't wish losing a child in the end l died with him rip lve one son left God willing my son now God protect him and keep him safe God bless missy good luck hope u never get that call God forbid keep talking girl well made video it's mentally in every way destroys u
Bless you, sweet friend 🧡
Shawna is sending Aidens' letter off todayShe told her mama what to say. Ans her mama wrote it for her. Lol.
Yes I'm definitely guilty of loving my son to death except he got in trouble and went to prison not because he was a bad person he is a recovering addict, he pulled 6 years but now he is doing great Thank God even though that was so hard onus all he got off drugs and I Pray he stays clean 1 day at a time 😢
💜❤️
I have been thru this same thing. It is devastating
It sure is 💔
We know so much more today than we did 7 years ago when my 35 year old son lost the fight. I did love my son to death and I feel it every single day.
I'm so sorry you lost your son! I'm sending you huge hugs, Mama!! 💜💜💜
Sending so much love to everyone having a hard time. I also pray you feel a sense of calm and the peace of Jesus. 🫂💙
"My peace I give unto you,
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Let not your heart be troubled nor let it be afraid."
-John 14:27
Thank you 💜
Great video and you are definitely helping family, parents and addicts.
Thank you 😊 💜
Prayers are always the answer ❤️❤️❤️
💜💜💜
I was told onetime that you are not dealing with your child. You are dealing with the drugs. They will tell you anything to get what they want. I finally gave up and I told them I was done and that it was between them and their God. I still love but I don;t like.
That pretty much sums it up, yes. It's heartbreaking 💔
Words of Wisdom. 🙏🏼❤️🕊️
💜💜💜
12:55 💯
29:25 💯😔
Wow Missy I feel your words so deeply 😔
💜💜💜
Everyone’s walk is different. I for one is in a no contact situation rt now with one of my sons( he’s wishes) I chose not to dance to his tunes like my ex husband does, therefore im useless to him. The pain I feel? Is deep, I gave it to God all mighty as soon as I felt where this was all going? ( mother’s intuition they call it?)
He is a successful businessman but closet user. I refuse to have any part of him using me as a puppet any longer and he caught on to it. So he cancelled me. Does it hurt? YES! Do I have to live with what happens from here on out? YES. I love him the same as I love my other 2 but I’ve been through enough to last me a lifetime so I pray a looot. God has the wheel with my son.
I so hope your son is still doing good and can't wait to see him on with you again. Great video today
Thank you! Hopefully we can get our schedules worked out to where he can have time to sit down and do another video with me 😉💜
Everything you have said, I've done. I've had every e xcuse there is from my son for money. I love my son deeply but also hate the person he is. He has multiple addictions, drugs, and his drink of choice - rum, gambling, and women...
As a mother, it's so hard to watch and go through the deconstruction that he causes. One by one, family members are getting tired and sick of his little outbursts. I'm seeking counselling for myself, but at present, it's not doing much good.
We parents just have to hope and pray that one day they will change.
Sending positive energy to you and your family ❤
Preach Girl....
Expensive calls...
Hi MIssy, I remember you saying that your son who is the addict was not your biological son. He may have Reactive attachment disorder, which means that he has had issues with bonding with you as a maternal mother. If this is true, does he ever see his maternal mother ? Just wondering. Our youngest son is adopted, and even thought we adopted him at 4 months old, he went through this stage. They love you, but at the same time can do actions that harm you (like selling your jewelry). Just a thought ...
No, he is my biological son. He's my youngest. The 2 older children aren't my biological but they're my children all the same
@@FromtheHoller I hope he is doing well in his out of town job. Perhaps this will get him on the road to recovery!
❤
denial
anger
bargaining
depression
acceptance...in that order.
Yep, that's it 💜
Thank you for remembering all of them.
Can you help me out with some new underwear! Thats a new one!
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
You need to read Sharon Greene's comment! You fell for every excuse!
I did read her comment and I even responded to her. Yes, I probably did fall for every excuse, but you know what, I cleaned up my mistakes and I learned from my experiences. That's all I'm going to say on that subject
I worry about you physically
That he could hurt you
I'm a tough old bird with one heck of a right hook 😉😊💜
Just saw your short on addiction. First I heard of shoulder surgery and doc giving him pain meds. I don’t like you blaming others for his addiction!
Have watched all your videos never heard you say it was docs fault for prescription drug over subscription! My son broke his leg and shoulder during football that required surgery in high school. We got him off subscription painkillers after 10 days. Went to Tylenol and Advil.
His doc was trying to help him with his pain. Now being blamed for a 14 year plus addiction.
First of all, I don't blame his addiction on anyone but him! Second of all, I talked about how his addiction started in my very 1st video on this topic over a year ago. Third of all, I really don't like being called a liar. You've clearly NOT watched all my videos if you've never heard me talk about this. And lastly, you need to check yourself before you call me out like this when I've done nothing but be open, honest and kind
❤