This is very brave of you, mate. If it's any consolation, just think of all the pleasure you bring, and have brought over the years, to many, many people. Keep smashing the radios, son.
Yes very brave - as bikers we try to hang tough, and pay the price... I found a good councellor was a help, as fresh outside thinking can often get things solved. Also 'ending it' doesn't actually solve anything - it just magnifies the pain by ten, and transfers it on to ones we love. Thanks Paul
Thank you for sharing this Paul. The worst part of depression for me was blaming myself for having no reason to feel depressed, it’s a vicious spiral. Parts of your brain become addicted to the chemicals they receive when you feel bad. After attempting suicide i was comforted by a stranger who helped me realise I wasn’t alone. I’ve tried to reach anyone I can to share the message please talk to someone. Courage is asking for help. Men are encouraged to be strong and resilient which makes us vulnerable. This too shall pass.
As a fellow sufferer, I look for small things to lift me - a sunny day, birds singing, a lovely motorcycle ride. I have to think that depression always goes back to childhood; something or other is in the memory banks and it is always just under the surface, ready to elbow its way out. Definitely this time of year is worst, because post-Christmas is difficult for some people, and the dark weather is a real bummer. Vitamin D is a definite help and an absolute necessity in dark Northern countries like ours.
I completely agree about the vitamin D thing, it really can lift your mood. I started taking it due to being deficient in it, and after a week or two was wondering why I felt so much brighter than I normally do at this time of year..
I have found that when I stopped blaming people, places & things for how I feel, I started to make progress. Nobody else is responsible for my pain. The other thing that was pointed out to me was, I had to change my thinking, challenge all my negative thought patterns.It's a slow process & sometimes a painful one, but it's real growth. I don't have to react,when someone disagrees with me,or things don't go my way.When I stop fighting everything & everyone around me, I gain peace of mind, I can accept life more, I feel grateful. My depression evaporates & I wake-up happy.
Been there. 58 now and have learned life can turn on a dime. Just when you think you can’t take another day things turn around. Thx for the words of wisdom.
Thanks Paul for sharing. I've always believed that people who suffer the darkness are creative, caring, honest types. Easy pray for the negative force. The dark is a bully nothing more. Your all valued greatly. Much appreciated.
I used to watch Lunmad and he was also a friend of the black dog. That man, to me, was a national trasure. He was also a brave man and put himself out there as you have done. I'd like to thank you for this as someone I am very fond of is on that train. God help us all to get off the next stop...keep your chin up and thanks for all the good you do.
Hi Paul, I really struggle with my mental and physical health this time of year. I literally have to force myself to do anything. Being self-employed, I can cover it up and pretend I've got the flu or something else. I get so upset about such small things. Thank god spring is around the corner 😁 All the best, David. Keep strong and keep these videos coming. It keeps me almost sane...
Same here the winter puts me in a sad, bad place. I have been told its the lack of sun .Weather or not thats true ,it is what happens to me in the winter!I try to stay focused on work and my hobbies .A good woman is a big help if you have one!
Respect Paul for having the courage to speak about it.I found getting to the 50 started to play on my mind. For me it made me realise many hopes & dreams were unachievable for the time left. I remember looking at my bank account & debt thinking how long I could survive not having to go to work where one manager made my life hell Then in my early 60,s the Black dog returned I was made redundant followed by two frozen shoulders which dragged me down into the bottom less pit Like you a failed attempt made me realise There was a way forward Now retired & 71 yrs old all is well
Thanks Paul, that's very brave and honest of you. I treat it like the weather, if it's raining and miserable today, be strong and push through it because tommoro it could be beautiful. Too many people suffer in silence like I have most of my life. It's important to talk, and your advice is very helpful.
Well expressed Paul , It’s not an easy thing to talk about , and admit , keep on keeping on ……life’s a difficult journey for lots of people , the older you get , you realise it’s a journey you have to endure to the end without giving in . All the best , Dave H
I was finally diagnosed with depression & anxiety attacks back around 1989 . I suspect I was suffering it many years before that. It hit me not when I was busy & stressed but when I was resting . I had lost interest in life ,felt like I was down a deep well & every time I struggled & about to reach the top ,I fell back down again . My GP knew I was a keen biker & spanned my own bikes , he suggested I strip down my sound but tatty Honda CB 250 RSA single down & totally refurb it ,for therapy . Bit by bit ,I managed to gradually get the bike fully refurbed & looking virtually as good as new & running sweet . This helped me also get back to work in my trade as self employed joiner. I realised I will always suffer with bouts of depression & anxiety ,but now I can notice the signs & find ways to cope & ride out the storm . Everyone like yourself Paul seems to find their own way of dealing with theses dark forces or what we see them as ,gradually find ways to handle the effects of them . I find like many other sufferers ,that riding motorcycles & spannering them provides me with therapy ,& going for a ride to a favourite view point helps put things in perspective & clear my head . Thank you for sharing it ,I know it’s not always easy & some out there tend to get being a bit fed up ,confused with real depression ,but those like us know there is one hell of a big difference when it hits us . 👍
Kit up,start up and ride away,the most marvellous feeling there is! Bikes saved my sanity,back in the black days,one of the reasons I love 'em so. As you say,it's a matter of toughing it out,standing firm until the bad feelings go...chased away by a hearty burst of throttle!
Bless you Paul and, as a fellow sufferer, thank you. I play drums and I ride motorcycles, both help enormously. I also like this Winston Churchill's words "If you're going through hell, keep going"
20 year’s here ✋ Is a lot of us about. Good job making the video. It all helps to get rid of the stigma of mental health problems. Definitely helps the people that are new to suffering with depression to know they ain’t alone also. 👍
Thank you for that chat Paul, it helps a lot. It is perfectly possible to feel lonely even within a loving family. There's that feeling that they are there for you, yet they don't know the inner feelings you have about yourself, those feelings of personal doubt and ineffectiveness at essential tasks. Any attempt to explain would only end up burdoning your own personal feelings of inner guilt onto them. That's how it is with me. Great chat, many thanks.
Thank you sincerely for talking about your own depression. As someone who has had depression for many years, on and off, where I was medically retired early, I really appreciate your insight. A colleague of mine at work bought a punch bag which he suspended from the ceiling and hit that as his way of driving some of it away. He was enthusiastic about this and thought that it was a great idea.
Pau WHAT man you are ,totally understand what you mean i got burgled 2x lost 15 k's worth of snap on tools i basically flipped had a breakdown lasting nearly 3x years , no help what so ever as i was a driver of big trucks , but i kept smiling drank lots of scotch numbed the pain !! but i never hurt no one ,had to run away in the end moved to the coast ,that was 14 years ago now im better moving back to family ,also to the guys who are having trouble do not ! be ashamed to cry .godbless to all .
G'day Paul, that was no rant, it's a strong man or woman the talks about how they feel, l am a Retuned Serviceman having two tours overseas with the Army, and have my share of nightmares, l havethe best support from my family and my passion with Classic motorcycles keeps me busy, cheers mate, Neil 🤠.
Paul, you’re Salt of the earth! Appreciate you taking the time to share your extensive knowledge. You’ve created an interesting and informative channel. Wishing you all the very best.
Well said Paul! Letting off steam is a really important piece of advice. Too few opportunities for many to do that these days. My go-to is chopping wood. You are a hero to many of us much more amateur spanner wielders. Remember that.
Well done Paul. Up until August last year, I may have viewed this as grow a pair. I then had an episode and had to deal with depression, anxiety, panic attacks and suicidal thoughts. It still ‘plays’ with my mind, but unless someone has experienced it, it is totally unexplainable. Glad I’m feeling a lot better, but when you get the dark waves…….. thank god for the good times…
Spot on Paul. I suffer badly. There is no logical explanation. It is dodgy brain chemistry The best help I got was a good GP and consultant who listened. Many doctors don't have a clue. I got the right medication, after a very harmful prescription which put me off for years. Returning to biking a few years ago made a huge difference. My bike is actually mentioned in my medical records. I take each day as it comes and plod along. I do what I can and try not to worry about what I can't. Thank you for your candid video. I think it will help people. There is no blame. Depression is a brain chemistry disorder. When I complained I understand, so why haven't l beaten it? My consultant said you can understand a broken leg but that doesn't fix it.
I've down that road as well and still do sometimes. I'm a a Christian so that gives me a lot of hope as well as identifying the dark demons that drag us down every so often.
A candid and open account Paul. I read The Good News of John. Especially ch15. Its worth its weight in Gold.I really do not know why we are all here in bondage in this world but I know we are here to witness; to undergo trials by fire; and to experience duality, polarity and separation which is this world. I have always found you an inspiration Paul. You do things according to the book and never bodge nor take short cuts. Much respect. God The Father bless you.
Thank you for sharing that Paul. I'm sure many folks must feel like this from time to time (I do), but not many people talk about it. Thankfully, most of us sort out some kind of way to deal with it, as you have. This took some intestinal fortitude to put out there, again thank you!
Hi Paul, Thank you for sharing the challenges you have. I suspect there are very many of us that also have difficulties with life from time to time, it takes its toll. Amongst the ‘cards’ you have been dealt in life is a unique ability to not only work with a deep understanding of the workings, or not, of machines of all ages, but also to be able to describe in clear and understandable language, what you are doing and why. This combination makes you quite exceptional in my experience. I look forward to many more of your insightful videos, and pleased don’t underestimate the respect and admiration you have from me and I am sure many of your subscribers. Cheers
Thanks for sharing Paul..I’ve been there as well..mornings are my strong point..but as the day goes on and I’m getting tired..sometimes depression starts to manifest..a little thing can throw the day off..I think we try to want to overachieve ..you have to step back, reassess and know that tomorrow will be a better day..🇨🇦
Well said Paul! Depression and anxiety are the very devil to deal with. I've been there with both of them over the course of my life and witnessed them affecting close family members. I didn't go quite so far as you describe with the self-destructive side of depression but I was giving it serious thought and planning at one time, many years ago. There is more awareness of it these days but not much more understanding. I think it helps to know more about how people experience depression and anxiety but I believe you only know when you've experienced one or the other or both at the same time. I am lucky that depression has now left me alone for a good few years but I'm not daft enough to think it is beaten or could never return. Anxiety is another matter and I have to keep an eye on that one.
Awesome video Paul, the more we speak about this terrible disease the more we will be able to support the ones we love. For those struggling with depression please look at your diet. I close friend has recent linked his suicidal bouts to particular foods and additives. I'm not going to say what they are because this is purely a private observational finding and no science or medical research
thank you for your honest words of experience, i too suffer from Depression, and i try to be as open and honest as yourself... the feeling of isolation sufferers feel can be relieved at least a little, by knowing others have similar experiences,
I am amazingly impressed. Luckily I am one of those people that never have experienced this problem . But you should know there a ton of people that look up to you . We all have motorcycles and you give us inspiration to tackle jobs we might have thought we were unable to do. Never loose sight of the fact that you are a help and inspiration to a lot of people . Try to remember that when you have a dark day there are a lot of people that admire and respect you and wish they had your ability and knowledge
Great video, Paul. I found it was when I was in a situation I had no control over. A job I hated or a mother with dementia. I learned not to worry over things outside my control. It helped a lot. Keep twisting the throttle!
Brave of you to do this Paul, I’ve been where you are mate and still on the smarties, a lot of blokes find depression difficult to talk about to other people but it really does help to talk, as I’m sure you know if you have an understanding family around you it makes all the difference, you and your vids really are a breath of fresh air to so many old bikers like us, hang in there my friend your not alone , maybe it’s too many blown a65 engines affecting your stability lol, seriously Paul your special , god bless !!
Good on you Paul. I suffered chronic depression for 9 long years. Didn't think I'd ever get out of that deep hole but for the last 2 years it only hits in short bursts. Take care mate, all the best from Australia
Hi Paul, I think talking about it is the best thing you can do, you’re a legend. I’m only young , but have suffered with depression / ocd for a few years since I was about 16 - the one thing that genuinely saved me was first off the right medication, I know there’s a stigma around it but Jesus it made me myself again ( sertraline ) and some cbt therapy, and of course my bikes. You’re a good man, I can feel it through the way you speak, thanks for breaking the stigma and being you.
That social stigma is still heavily ingrained. My late friend Bob suffered badly from Bi-polarity throughout his life. At his funeral, the collection was not for the life-long depression, but for the one year brain tumour, with no mention of depression during the service. I wasn't impressed, but I kept quiet as that is how his family wanted it.
What a great video Paul I believe you are speaking for a massive swave of people that just keep quiet because of the stigma But depression can hit anyone at any time regardless of wealth etc Well done mate You have helped me
Thanks for your honestyand openness Paul..... that in and of itself can benefit, the realisation that one isn't alone with these feelings. Personally this last year has been unusually good one for me..... not seen much of the "black dog"..... As a young man I discovered splitting logs to be brilliant therapy ....all that pent-up anger, frustration, depression that you spoke of can, with a heavy axe, be taken out on a pile of logs.... the joy is after wearing yourself out and all the carnage you had also done something useful! Keep the vids coming. Best wishes.
God I no how you feel I have been there and found love it took meny years to get better god bless you Paul for taking About it that thing of boy do not cry
Thank you for speaking about this Paul.. we men need to be much more open about stuff like this. I have had a similar experience and neither of us are alone. Please please take good care of yourself.. thank you for speaking out, you will have helped others by doing so.
Your "Darkness" is as real as a broken arm or even cancer, it is an illness that can be helped, but as a sufferer myself it was refreshing to hear what you had to say, and also that you acknowledge the fact that you DO suffer from depression. Many of us don't survive to tell the tale, so keep yourself in good shape, who else is going to show us how to shim a A65 crankshaft?
Paul, thank you for a very good video today. I admire your courage in talking about depression. It will help and comfort so many people who suffer in silence.
Paul I think you give so much pleasure to me and lots of other old bike guys just keep doing what you do. All of us feel down at some point especially at this time of year seasonal affected disorder . Clients who give you engines to work on with an unknown history will always have the possibility of failure. This would upset most people if a motor goes bang some customers don't want to blame themselves ! Wow just keep on doing what you do I like many others enjoy and look forward to all your video's. Your nrilliant mate.
This is a great video Paul! I have been watching some of your videos here lately and enjoyed them all. I think this video is good for all to see and listen too. I appreciate your time on this one. I would love to see more videos about life, experiences, etc. You have a great way of explaining things and a very calm and sincere voice. Keep it up........
So glad you shared this Paul , you are right , we need to keep having this conversation. Keeping it behind closed doors helps no one . Thanks again for this video and all your others .
Good day Paul. I’ve always seen something in you, that reminds me of myself. You are an inspiration to all you cross path’s with and your honesty is inspiring. God bless you, and may your bright days greatly outnumber the dark!
Thanks Paul, I think many people go through some sort of depression, I do, some worse than others, It does help to know you're not on your own. For what it's worth I think your body seems to go up and down chemically and if you're low in whatever it is and something else happens, it can trigger a "downer". But as you say as long as you can realise and believe/tell yourself that it will pass and get better, this helps me. I'm the same as you I've got everything going for me but I still get down, especially in the dark short winter days. It does help me to watch your videos, encourages me to get out there, check my bike out and do a bit. Thanks
I totally understand Paul.. lately I’ve suffered badly with it.. especially last year.. everything seems to get on top of me… I got in a right state. Little things drive you down into a black hole..
Thank you for making this video. Its difficult to comment without sounding condescending or just being a twat but I wonder if it felt better getting it out. Also family suffer with (me) too adding to the pressure, but they would choose me being there with it than not being there at all. So, thanks again.
you are a good man Paul. That took a lot of guts to sit there and say that. You will without doubt have helped a lot of folks out there. Your channel brings a lot of joy and pleasure to lots of people you should be proud of that. And Pauls rants well they should be on national television. Take care.
Hello Paul, personally I find the winter months and lack of Sunlight seem to gather dark thoughts. Like you, I keep my head down and work hard to push through. There’s usually something that will surprise you with a little lift which brings you back onto an even keel. Cheers Kevin.
Your "first person rider" videos give me a boost and are the next best thing to going for a ride myself, which is impossible for the next few months, it's too cold, snowy, rainy, windy and salty.
Well said Paul. I have suffered massively from serious depression for decades.. and sometimes life can be a bitch, and more on some than on others (especially in my case) You are brave to share your experience, something that I would have great difficulty in doing. I respect you enormously. Chin up Paul, it's all we can do. Warm regards, Gary.
Good on ya Paul. I tackle it by getting stuck into stuff that rapidly whiles away the time without taxing my brain. Gardening and walking/climbing the many hills that surround our home both seem to work well for me. (Hard exercise seems to be particularly beneficial). I'm also continually fine-tuning the skill of "blotting out negative thoughts by over-riding them with positive ones" . 😊
I was in the same same state as you. One day I had a completer breakdown. It got better eventually. Do not discount medication for control of depression. Do not attempt to keep it a secret. Talk about it to others and explain what it does to you. I believe you will find that a lot of people are in the same situation and will understand your situation. Depression is an illness as much as anything else. I don't think people view it as something to be stigmatized rather they see it as something to be treated for what it is. Try medication, if one type doesn't work, try another until you find one that makes a difference. I have improved my condition to something that is manageable. I have worked on cars and bikes my whole life much as you do. It has helped me keep a balanced mental state. A good blast on my 71 Norton or my 71 T120 always helps me! Keep pushing on!
Good Man 👍👏! We've all been there or know someone who has, best wishes to you and well done for having the selflessness and courage to post your great message, thank you
Thank you for sharing, your honesty I'm sure will be helpful to many, it's not easy when you suffer, and not easy to share in such a public way, thank you
Bloody hell Paul.. A very powerful video.. If someone walking into a pub with a broken leg you'll get sympathy but if you have mental health issues you're looked upon as if you're cookcoo.. I had bouts in my past but have learned to control it by giving the darkness an identity, something to focus on and to fight against and telling it it's not going to beat me... Anyway chum.. We'll be thinking about you... Keep the faith..
when married my wife called them my glums,used too last 3 days.got worse in the end and went the chemical route.not an easy path to take but sorted me 3 times.good that you talk about this.million dollar bogan talks about this on his channel,mad harley adventurer.people do need to talk to people about how they feel.keeping it to yourself is not the way to go.well done for sharing.
Better times are around the corner. Not every corner though! Maybe it will take some time to find the right corner but you will find it eventually. I'm now in my late 50's and I'm very glad to be here because like you, it could have been very different. Here's to a long life, for all of us.
Been there this past week, triggered by something so trivial its hard to believe, then this morning all gone everything is fine, sun shining got bike out had a ride out . Your right paul it does pass !! Take care all
Paul thank you for that ,I suffer very much the same. It helpes hearing we are not alone with this. It is worse for me in the winter.I try and focus on my business and hobbies , when (IT )flares up .Also having a good woman around who understands helps for me!
Paul - what a brilliant video. And kudos to you for having the balls to put this video out there and talk about ‘the black dog’. We need to talk about depression more! Especially men! Depression is far more prevalent than people want to admit. And how we deal with the black dog is an individual thing - so if you want to smash an old object up, so be it! Or go for a walk, go for a ride, or whatever. Ending things is not the answer, because that passes the hurt, pain,trigger for depression to your friends, family etc. But it might feel like the answer to some - so, we need to TALK! Reach out and ask your mate, brother, son, ‘are you ok?’. Keep safe and well done, Paul 👏👏
Thanks for this vid. It's not the way I deal with it. But needs to be expressed. Anyway, part of my recuperation is the endless hobby fettling a couple of old motorbikes. And your excellent vids make that more possible. Keep communicating on this medium Paul. You are a top bloke.
Well done for speaking out like that, as you said if it helps just one person on through the darkness it a job well done, just like all the jobs you do on the bikes. Wishing you good health from Dublin Ireland .
Av been there done that virtually same way word for word and still soldiering on. In my opinion it’s because we are hard working and care about what we do. Keep up the good work we have to keep the old bikes going 👍
Thank you Paul for sharing your story and thoughts on depression. I also have had similar experiences at various times during my life and have come very close to the edge, so to speak. It was eye opening for me when I discovered that there were and are so many people suffering to varying degrees and the coping mechanisms used. Obviously we are not alone in this space. You are very brave to share these things in a public forum like this and I hope you continue to fight and defeat those demons. Your channel is always enjoyable and informative for me and I look forward to your postings and insights. Keep up the good work. Cheers, Dan. ✌️🏍🇨🇦
This is very brave of you, mate. If it's any consolation, just think of all the pleasure you bring, and have brought over the years, to many, many people. Keep smashing the radios, son.
Yes very brave - as bikers we try to hang tough, and pay the price... I found a good councellor was a help, as fresh outside thinking can often get things solved. Also 'ending it' doesn't actually solve anything - it just magnifies the pain by ten, and transfers it on to ones we love. Thanks Paul
Thank you for sharing this Paul. The worst part of depression for me was blaming myself for having no reason to feel depressed, it’s a vicious spiral. Parts of your brain become addicted to the chemicals they receive when you feel bad. After attempting suicide i was comforted by a stranger who helped me realise I wasn’t alone. I’ve tried to reach anyone I can to share the message please talk to someone. Courage is asking for help. Men are encouraged to be strong and resilient which makes us vulnerable. This too shall pass.
As a fellow sufferer, I look for small things to lift me - a sunny day, birds singing, a lovely motorcycle ride. I have to think that depression always goes back to childhood; something or other is in the memory banks and it is always just under the surface, ready to elbow its way out. Definitely this time of year is worst, because post-Christmas is difficult for some people, and the dark weather is a real bummer. Vitamin D is a definite help and an absolute necessity in dark Northern countries like ours.
find dogs make me feel better the devotion and love they give you is awsome
I completely agree about the vitamin D thing, it really can lift your mood. I started taking it due to being deficient in it, and after a week or two was wondering why I felt so much brighter than I normally do at this time of year..
Another one to agree about Vit D, took me a long while to work it out, some dark days a few years back, but Vit D is a must for me.
Very brave of you to put this out there, the darkness (as you call it, as do I) is never far away, nor is the dark rabbit hole.
i call it the dark cloud just hovering above you , not had it in a good while .
I have found that when I stopped blaming people, places & things for how I feel, I started to make progress.
Nobody else is responsible for my pain.
The other thing that was pointed out to me was, I had to change my thinking, challenge all my negative thought patterns.It's a slow process & sometimes a painful one, but it's real growth.
I don't have to react,when someone disagrees with me,or things don't go my way.When I stop fighting everything & everyone around me, I gain peace of mind, I can accept life more, I feel grateful.
My depression evaporates & I wake-up happy.
Been there. 58 now and have learned life can turn on a dime. Just when you think you can’t take another day things turn around. Thx for the words of wisdom.
Thanks Paul for sharing. I've always believed that people who suffer the darkness are creative, caring, honest types. Easy pray for the negative force. The dark is a bully nothing more. Your all valued greatly. Much appreciated.
What a terrible loss that would have been Thanks for all the pleasure you have provided for me just watching and enjoying your work
Thank you!
I used to watch Lunmad and he was also a friend of the black dog. That man, to me, was a national trasure. He was also a brave man and put himself out there as you have done. I'd like to thank you for this as someone I am very fond of is on that train. God help us all to get off the next stop...keep your chin up and thanks for all the good you do.
Hi Paul, I really struggle with my mental and physical health this time of year. I literally have to force myself to do anything.
Being self-employed, I can cover it up and pretend I've got the flu or something else.
I get so upset about such small things.
Thank god spring is around the corner 😁
All the best, David.
Keep strong and keep these videos coming. It keeps me almost sane...
Same here the winter puts me in a sad, bad place. I have been told its the lack of sun .Weather or not thats true ,it is what happens to me in the winter!I try to stay focused on work and my hobbies .A good woman is a big help if you have one!
Respect Paul for having the courage to speak about it.I found getting to the 50 started to play on my mind. For me it made me realise many hopes & dreams were unachievable for the time left. I remember looking at my bank account & debt thinking how long I could survive not having to go to work where one manager made my life hell Then in my early 60,s the Black dog returned I was made redundant followed by two frozen shoulders which dragged me down into the bottom less pit Like you a failed attempt made me realise There was a way forward Now retired & 71 yrs old all is well
You give a lot of pleasure to a lot of people.
I hope if anything,making this video helps you Paul.
You're not alone mate, thanks for sharing, brave of you.
Thanks Paul, that's very brave and honest of you. I treat it like the weather, if it's raining and miserable today, be strong and push through it because tommoro it could be beautiful. Too many people suffer in silence like I have most of my life. It's important to talk, and your advice is very helpful.
Thank you for making this video. It helped a lot.
Well expressed Paul , It’s not an easy thing to talk about , and admit , keep on keeping on ……life’s a difficult journey for lots of people , the older you get , you realise it’s a journey you have to endure to the end without
giving in . All the best , Dave H
I love your videos Paul. You have lots of people all around the world thinking positive thoughts about you. Especially other Tiger Cub owners!
I was finally diagnosed with depression & anxiety attacks back around 1989 . I suspect I was suffering it many years before that. It hit me not when I was busy & stressed but when I was resting . I had lost interest in life ,felt like I was down a deep well & every time I struggled & about to reach the top ,I fell back down again . My GP knew I was a keen biker & spanned my own bikes , he suggested I strip down my sound but tatty Honda CB 250 RSA single down & totally refurb it ,for therapy . Bit by bit ,I managed to gradually get the bike fully refurbed & looking virtually as good as new & running sweet . This helped me also get back to work in my trade as self employed joiner. I realised I will always suffer with bouts of depression & anxiety ,but now I can notice the signs & find ways to cope & ride out the storm . Everyone like yourself Paul seems to find their own way of dealing with theses dark forces or what we see them as ,gradually find ways to handle the effects of them . I find like many other sufferers ,that riding motorcycles & spannering them provides me with therapy ,& going for a ride to a favourite view point helps put things in perspective & clear my head . Thank you for sharing it ,I know it’s not always easy & some out there tend to get being a bit fed up ,confused with real depression ,but those like us know there is one hell of a big difference when it hits us . 👍
Kit up,start up and ride away,the most marvellous feeling there is! Bikes saved my sanity,back in the black days,one of the reasons I love 'em so. As you say,it's a matter of toughing it out,standing firm until the bad feelings go...chased away by a hearty burst of throttle!
the black dog attacks a perfectionist
Bless you Paul and, as a fellow sufferer, thank you. I play drums and I ride motorcycles, both help enormously. I also like this Winston Churchill's words "If you're going through hell, keep going"
20 year’s here ✋ Is a lot of us about. Good job making the video. It all helps to get rid of the stigma of mental health problems. Definitely helps the people that are new to suffering with depression to know they ain’t alone also. 👍
Thank you for that chat Paul, it helps a lot. It is perfectly possible to feel lonely even within a loving family. There's that feeling that they are there for you, yet they don't know the inner feelings you have about yourself, those feelings of personal doubt and ineffectiveness at essential tasks. Any attempt to explain would only end up burdoning your own personal feelings of inner guilt onto them. That's how it is with me. Great chat, many thanks.
Thank you sincerely for talking about your own depression. As someone who has had depression for many years, on and off, where I was medically retired early, I really appreciate your insight. A colleague of mine at work bought a punch bag which he suspended from the ceiling and hit that as his way of driving some of it away. He was enthusiastic about this and thought that it was a great idea.
Pau WHAT man you are ,totally understand what you mean i got burgled 2x lost 15 k's worth of snap on tools i basically flipped had a breakdown lasting nearly 3x years , no help what so ever as i was a driver of big trucks , but i kept smiling drank lots of scotch numbed the pain !! but i never hurt no one ,had to run away in the end moved to the coast ,that was 14 years ago now im better moving back to family ,also to the guys who are having trouble do not ! be ashamed to cry .godbless to all .
A brave and courageous video Paul. You have my full respect.
Keep pumping out the bike repair vids.
Thanks, will do!
G'day Paul, that was no rant, it's a strong man or woman the talks about how they feel, l am a Retuned Serviceman having two tours overseas with the Army, and have my share of nightmares, l havethe best support from my family and my passion with Classic motorcycles keeps me busy, cheers mate, Neil 🤠.
Paul, you’re Salt of the earth! Appreciate you taking the time to share your extensive knowledge. You’ve created an interesting and informative channel. Wishing you all the very best.
Well said Paul! Letting off steam is a really important piece of advice. Too few opportunities for many to do that these days. My go-to is chopping wood.
You are a hero to many of us much more amateur spanner wielders. Remember that.
Full credit to you Paul for having the courage to speak out. Depression is a terrible problem for so many.
Good on you Paul, to share this with us. When these forces appear to you, think 12K of subscribers care about you.
Well done Paul. Up until August last year, I may have viewed this as grow a pair. I then had an episode and had to deal with depression, anxiety, panic attacks and suicidal thoughts. It still ‘plays’ with my mind, but unless someone has experienced it, it is totally unexplainable. Glad I’m feeling a lot better, but when you get the dark waves…….. thank god for the good times…
Spot on Paul. I suffer badly. There is no logical explanation. It is dodgy brain chemistry The best help I got was a good GP and consultant who listened. Many doctors don't have a clue. I got the right medication, after a very harmful prescription which put me off for years. Returning to biking a few years ago made a huge difference. My bike is actually mentioned in my medical records. I take each day as it comes and plod along. I do what I can and try not to worry about what I can't. Thank you for your candid video. I think it will help people. There is no blame. Depression is a brain chemistry disorder. When I complained I understand, so why haven't l beaten it? My consultant said you can understand a broken leg but that doesn't fix it.
I've down that road as well and still do sometimes.
I'm a a Christian so that gives me a lot of hope as well as identifying the dark demons that drag us down every so often.
I,m a christian to even wear a cross does help
A candid and open account Paul. I read The Good News of John. Especially ch15. Its worth its weight in Gold.I really do not know why we are all here in bondage in this world but I know we are here to witness; to undergo trials by fire; and to experience duality, polarity and separation which is this world. I have always found you an inspiration Paul. You do things according to the book and never bodge nor take short cuts. Much respect. God The Father bless you.
Thank you for sharing that Paul. I'm sure many folks must feel like this from time to time (I do), but not many people talk about it. Thankfully, most of us sort out some kind of way to deal with it, as you have. This took some intestinal fortitude to put out there, again thank you!
Hi Paul, Thank you for sharing the challenges you have. I suspect there are very many of us that also have difficulties with life from time to time, it takes its toll. Amongst the ‘cards’ you have been dealt in life is a unique ability to not only work with a deep understanding of the workings, or not, of machines of all ages, but also to be able to describe in clear and understandable language, what you are doing and why. This combination makes you quite exceptional in my experience. I look forward to many more of your insightful videos, and pleased don’t underestimate the respect and admiration you have from me and I am sure many of your subscribers. Cheers
Thanks for sharing Paul..I’ve been there as well..mornings are my strong point..but as the day goes on and I’m getting tired..sometimes depression starts to manifest..a little thing can throw the day off..I think we try to want to overachieve ..you have to step back, reassess and know that tomorrow will be a better day..🇨🇦
Well said Paul! Depression and anxiety are the very devil to deal with. I've been there with both of them over the course of my life and witnessed them affecting close family members. I didn't go quite so far as you describe with the self-destructive side of depression but I was giving it serious thought and planning at one time, many years ago. There is more awareness of it these days but not much more understanding. I think it helps to know more about how people experience depression and anxiety but I believe you only know when you've experienced one or the other or both at the same time. I am lucky that depression has now left me alone for a good few years but I'm not daft enough to think it is beaten or could never return. Anxiety is another matter and I have to keep an eye on that one.
Awesome video Paul, the more we speak about this terrible disease the more we will be able to support the ones we love.
For those struggling with depression please look at your diet. I close friend has recent linked his suicidal bouts to particular foods and additives. I'm not going to say what they are because this is purely a private observational finding and no science or medical research
thank you for your honest words of experience, i too suffer from Depression, and i try to be as open and honest as yourself... the feeling of isolation sufferers feel can be relieved at least a little, by knowing others have similar experiences,
I like your description of fighting the downs! Thank you for that one.
I am amazingly impressed. Luckily I am one of those people that never have experienced this problem . But you should know there a ton of people that look up to you . We all have motorcycles and you give us inspiration to tackle jobs we might have thought we were unable to do. Never loose sight of the fact that you are a help and inspiration to a lot of people . Try to remember that when you have a dark day there are a lot of people that admire and respect you and wish they had your ability and knowledge
Great video, Paul. I found it was when I was in a situation I had no control over. A job I hated or a mother with dementia. I learned not to worry over things outside my control. It helped a lot. Keep twisting the throttle!
Brave of you to do this Paul, I’ve been where you are mate and still on the smarties, a lot of blokes find depression difficult to talk about to other people but it really does help to talk, as I’m sure you know if you have an understanding family around you it makes all the difference, you and your vids really are a breath of fresh air to so many old bikers like us, hang in there my friend your not alone , maybe it’s too many blown a65 engines affecting your stability lol, seriously Paul your special , god bless !!
Thank you for sharing this. It often has more impact when someone with the condition talks about how it is for them
Good on you Paul. I suffered chronic depression for 9 long years. Didn't think I'd ever get out of that deep hole but for the last 2 years it only hits in short bursts. Take care mate, all the best from Australia
Hi Paul, I think talking about it is the best thing you can do, you’re a legend. I’m only young , but have suffered with depression / ocd for a few years since I was about 16 - the one thing that genuinely saved me was first off the right medication, I know there’s a stigma around it but Jesus it made me myself again ( sertraline ) and some cbt therapy, and of course my bikes. You’re a good man, I can feel it through the way you speak, thanks for breaking the stigma and being you.
You’re not alone thanks for sharing, walked with the black dog since I was in my teens
That social stigma is still heavily ingrained. My late friend Bob suffered badly from Bi-polarity throughout his life. At his funeral, the collection was not for the life-long depression, but for the one year brain tumour, with no mention of depression during the service. I wasn't impressed, but I kept quiet as that is how his family wanted it.
What a great video Paul
I believe you are speaking for a massive swave of people that just keep quiet because of the stigma
But depression can hit anyone at any time regardless of wealth etc
Well done mate
You have helped me
Very brave Paul! You are TOP!
Thanks for your honestyand openness Paul..... that in and of itself can benefit, the realisation that one isn't alone with these feelings.
Personally this last year has been unusually good one for me..... not seen much of the "black dog"..... As a young man I discovered splitting logs to be brilliant therapy ....all that pent-up anger, frustration, depression that you spoke of can, with a heavy axe, be taken out on a pile of logs.... the joy is after wearing yourself out and all the carnage you had also done something useful!
Keep the vids coming.
Best wishes.
God I no how you feel I have been there and found love it took meny years to get better god bless you Paul for taking About it that thing of boy do not cry
Thank you for speaking about this Paul.. we men need to be much more open about stuff like this. I have had a similar experience and neither of us are alone. Please please take good care of yourself.. thank you for speaking out, you will have helped others by doing so.
well said Paul.
Well done Paul your words are very true and honest, I have had time's when I've been down the dark path. You are a good person with a lot of soul.
Your "Darkness" is as real as a broken arm or even cancer, it is an illness that can be helped, but as a sufferer myself it was refreshing to hear what you had to say, and also that you acknowledge the fact that you DO suffer from depression. Many of us don't survive to tell the tale, so keep yourself in good shape, who else is going to show us how to shim a A65 crankshaft?
I love you buddy! Your Videos bring me much pleasure👍
Very brave of you Paul - thank you for wanting to help others!
Thank you for the honesty Paul. Courage to post and very true.
Shout out Paul for what its worth this fing 1951 G2 will be on the road your vids keep me motivated 👍👊👊👊
Paul, thank you for a very good video today. I admire your courage in talking about depression. It will help and comfort so many people who suffer in silence.
Paul I think you give so much pleasure to me and lots of other old bike guys just keep doing what you do.
All of us feel down at some point especially at this time of year seasonal affected disorder . Clients who give you engines to work on with an unknown history will always have the possibility of failure. This would upset most people if a motor goes bang some customers don't want to blame themselves !
Wow just keep on doing what you do I like many others enjoy and look forward to all your video's. Your nrilliant mate.
Very brave Paul, sorry to hear about your depression, fight the good fight. Your work is top notch , and not bodging👍
This is a great video Paul! I have been watching some of your videos here lately and enjoyed them all. I think this video is good for all to see and listen too. I appreciate your time on this one. I would love to see more videos about life, experiences, etc. You have a great way of explaining things and a very calm and sincere voice. Keep it up........
Thanks!
Well done Paul. Helpful words. The sun always rises.
So glad you shared this Paul , you are right , we need to keep having this conversation. Keeping it behind closed doors helps no one . Thanks again for this video and all your others .
Good day Paul. I’ve always seen something in you, that reminds me of myself. You are an inspiration to all you cross path’s with and your honesty is inspiring. God bless you, and may your bright days greatly outnumber the dark!
Thanks Paul, I think many people go through some sort of depression, I do, some worse than others, It does help to know you're not on your own.
For what it's worth I think your body seems to go up and down chemically and if you're low in whatever it is and something else happens, it can trigger a "downer".
But as you say as long as you can realise and believe/tell yourself that it will pass and get better, this helps me.
I'm the same as you I've got everything going for me but I still get down, especially in the dark short winter days.
It does help me to watch your videos, encourages me to get out there, check my bike out and do a bit. Thanks
Thanks for the honest and caring video. We, your fans appreciate you very much.
I totally understand Paul.. lately I’ve suffered badly with it.. especially last year.. everything seems to get on top of me… I got in a right state. Little things drive you down into a black hole..
Thank you for making this video. Its difficult to comment without sounding condescending or just being a twat but I wonder if it felt better getting it out. Also family suffer with (me) too adding to the pressure, but they would choose me being there with it than not being there at all. So, thanks again.
you are a good man Paul. That took a lot of guts to sit there and say that. You will without doubt have helped a lot of folks out there. Your channel brings a lot of joy and pleasure to lots of people you should be proud of that. And Pauls rants well they should be on national television. Take care.
You're a good man, Paul.
Thank you.
Hello Paul, personally I find the winter months and lack of Sunlight seem to gather dark thoughts. Like you, I keep my head down and work hard to push through. There’s usually something that will surprise you with a little lift which brings you back onto an even keel.
Cheers Kevin.
Your "first person rider" videos give me a boost and are the next best thing to going for a ride myself, which is impossible for the next few months, it's too cold, snowy, rainy, windy and salty.
Well said Paul.
I have suffered massively from serious depression for decades.. and sometimes life can be a bitch, and more on some than on others (especially in my case)
You are brave to share your experience, something that I would have great difficulty in doing.
I respect you enormously.
Chin up Paul, it's all we can do.
Warm regards,
Gary.
Thanks, Gary.
Good on ya Paul. I tackle it by getting stuck into stuff that rapidly whiles away the time without taxing my brain. Gardening and walking/climbing the many hills that surround our home both seem to work well for me. (Hard exercise seems to be particularly beneficial). I'm also continually fine-tuning the skill of "blotting out negative thoughts by over-riding them with positive ones" . 😊
Paul, please seek help. Do not be ashamed. I went thru the same thing 20 years ago. One thing that keeps me going is your channel. Thanks !
I was in the same same state as you. One day I had a completer breakdown. It got better eventually. Do not discount medication for control of depression. Do not attempt to keep it a secret. Talk about it to others and explain what it does to you. I believe you will find that a lot of people are in the same situation and will understand your situation. Depression is an illness as much as anything else. I don't think people view it as something to be stigmatized rather they see it as something to be treated for what it is. Try medication, if one type doesn't work, try another until you find one that makes a difference. I have improved my condition to something that is manageable. I have worked on cars and bikes my whole life much as you do. It has helped me keep a balanced mental state. A good blast on my 71 Norton or my 71 T120 always helps me! Keep pushing on!
My people struggle and never let others know. Cheers to you for sharing and encouraging others.
Well said Paul.
Thank you Paul
Good Man 👍👏! We've all been there or know someone who has, best wishes to you and well done for having the selflessness and courage to post your great message, thank you
Hi Paul you must be proud of the help you give us all not forgetting the companionship that I am sure Everybody will agree. All the best mate
The ranting helps I do it when things are boiling up..
Thank you for sharing, your honesty I'm sure will be helpful to many, it's not easy when you suffer, and not easy to share in such a public way, thank you
Bloody hell Paul.. A very powerful video.. If someone walking into a pub with a broken leg you'll get sympathy but if you have mental health issues you're looked upon as if you're cookcoo.. I had bouts in my past but have learned to control it by giving the darkness an identity, something to focus on and to fight against and telling it it's not going to beat me...
Anyway chum.. We'll be thinking about you... Keep the faith..
when married my wife called them my glums,used too last 3 days.got worse in the end and went the chemical route.not an easy path to take but sorted me 3 times.good that you talk about this.million dollar bogan talks about this on his channel,mad harley adventurer.people do need to talk to people about how they feel.keeping it to yourself is not the way to go.well done for sharing.
Better times are around the corner. Not every corner though! Maybe it will take some time to find the right corner but you will find it eventually. I'm now in my late 50's and I'm very glad to be here because like you, it could have been very different. Here's to a long life, for all of us.
Been there this past week, triggered by something so trivial its hard to believe, then this morning all gone everything is fine, sun shining got bike out had a ride out .
Your right paul it does pass !! Take care all
Paul thank you for that ,I suffer very much the same. It helpes hearing we are not alone with this. It is worse for me in the winter.I try and focus on my business and hobbies , when (IT )flares up .Also having a good woman around who understands helps for me!
Paul - what a brilliant video. And kudos to you for having the balls to put this video out there and talk about ‘the black dog’. We need to talk about depression more! Especially men! Depression is far more prevalent than people want to admit. And how we deal with the black dog is an individual thing - so if you want to smash an old object up, so be it! Or go for a walk, go for a ride, or whatever. Ending things is not the answer, because that passes the hurt, pain,trigger for depression to your friends, family etc. But it might feel like the answer to some - so, we need to TALK! Reach out and ask your mate, brother, son, ‘are you ok?’.
Keep safe and well done, Paul 👏👏
Thanks for this vid. It's not the way I deal with it. But needs to be expressed. Anyway, part of my recuperation is the endless hobby fettling a couple of old motorbikes.
And your excellent vids make that more possible.
Keep communicating on this medium Paul.
You are a top bloke.
Well said Paul thank you
That takes courage mate and suddenly i don't feel so alone
Well done for speaking out like that, as you said if it helps just one person on through the darkness it a job well done, just like all the jobs you do on the bikes. Wishing you good health from Dublin Ireland .
Av been there done that virtually same way word for word and still soldiering on. In my opinion it’s because we are hard working and care about what we do. Keep up the good work we have to keep the old bikes going 👍
Thank you Paul for sharing your story and thoughts on depression. I also have had similar experiences at various times during my life and have come very close to the edge, so to speak. It was eye opening for me when I discovered that there were and are so many people suffering to varying degrees and the coping mechanisms used. Obviously we are not alone in this space. You are very brave to share these things in a public forum like this and I hope you continue to fight and defeat those demons. Your channel is always enjoyable and informative for me and I look forward to your postings and insights. Keep up the good work. Cheers, Dan. ✌️🏍🇨🇦
Its a horrible thing Paul. My wife has suffered with it for years. Your channel is excellent and brings joy to many.