BIBLE WIVES! /// EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE!
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- Опубликовано: 16 авг 2022
- Video by KYLE FREAKIN’ KENYON
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Really fond of the ethereal screaming throughout the video. That's what I felt growing up in Oklahoma
Belt buckle of the bible belt!
This is the best description of growing up in Oklahoma. I feel it in my soul.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Oklahoma. I get it. I have people there. Odd place.
Iowa, West Virginia, Indiana.... all agree with you.
I can't imagine why religious affiliation is dropping.
"None of this is supported in the culture. Only our church supports this." Yes. Good reason to ditch the church, right there. Everyone else is in the 21st century and Evangelicals are still stuck in 2000 years ago.
@@auntieheksold-timemedicine3045 it sounds pathetic when you say it like that
My mother and two sisters are in unloving abusive relationships thanks to this verse and the church they go to. Pastor Anderson on here admitted to his mall-store congregation that he does not ask his wife consent because it's his due. Marital rape is a terrible thing in the church.
But jokes aside, it really bugs me that he thinks Predator has Stallone in it.
Oh god that triggered me like nothing else.
@Mr7Reality great reference
These people truly have no redeeming qualities.
Sexist, demanding, and can't even get the most basic knowledge about the Predator franchise right! A man like that checks out on all the wrong boxes!
"I never had marriage counseling in my entire life" sums up this video remarkebly well
I said this once, and my wife submitted to giving me a black eye.
🤣
Did you respond by knocking her unconscious? You know, to enforce submission?
😂😂😂
Divorce papers and alimony.
When you know you're losing the culture war, but are desperate to convince yourself otherwise.
there isn’t even a “culture war”…it’s like how bill hicks described “the drug war”…”it’s like they’re redcoats standing in a straight line and we’re the native americans up in the trees thinking ‘are they fighting us? fuck we’re not even that fuckin field!’”
If I told my wife she was a weaker vessel, she'd remove my vessel.
My ex wife didn’t submit to my Cleveland Steamer fetish and that was the last straw.
Maybe she didn't get the memo that Jesus would take a towel and clean up the poop.
I’ve never seen 10 minutes of men begging for a female dom… but here we are…
I’m here. 🥰
some of them would probably like a male dom
The want level pegging.
exactly
Vic berger level greatness
Wives submit.....your resignation from the church immediately!!!!
Theyre better off having a rollercoaster of casual sex and abortions until their 30s then no longer able to conceive a child or find a meaningful relationship, be poisoned by antidepressants until (hopefully) premature death
ok thatsa good one
@@viciousKev I'm here for a good time, not a long time.
Instructions unclear, am now happily divorced
Say you're a cult without saying you're a cult:
then you have never seen the everything is terrible:the great satan movie
im sure these guys are in one making these vids...comet ping pong like
I'm going to cite this video as a source when I write my thesis on schizophrenia.
The "feminist literature" that says "you know, maybe we don't need to submit..."
Ladies - If we've learned anything, it's:
1. Submit
2. Poop
3. Get to the chopper.
It's just that simple. Now make me a sandwich.
For the husbands scat fetish which is another way for her to submit
Thanks for the recap. As a woman, and therefore a being of lesser intelligence, I really needed it explained simply. Now that that's sorted, you want a beer with that sandwich?
😉🤣
@@kikib8434get your bitch a$$ to the kitchen and make me a chicken pot pie! (South Park)
@@kikib8434 NO! IT'S _MY_ TURN TO FETCH HIS BEER! 😡
Idk if that second option is possible, chief.
"So I'm reading this bible... It sucks. Don't buy this author's books." Baby Cakes
Do you remember which comic/episode this was? Burst out laughing reading it in his voice.
@@TheTrogdorrunner Diary #1. Enjoy.
"It helps to have a chi-hammer at the ready." Baby Cakes
and yet, they are the one complaininig about "muslims enslaving women"
Yup
Ironic no?
I think they're ok with that
The Bible, a review: “Uproariously funny. You’ll start laughing when a woman is crafted from a side of ribs, and you won’t stop until long after the seven-headed leapord-bear-lion-dragon does battle with a zombie made of bread and wine.”
These "women" creatures sound terrifying. I hope I never encounter one
I remember my mom trying to get me into Joyce Meyer at like 12 yrs old. Preteen. Child. Minor. Hearing another woman say she needs to be submissive to her husband and get certain things "wacked out of her".
I know how you feel. My Mom still watches and keeps up with Joyce Meyer. I always knew something was off about her, and it seriously feels validating that she's shown in these videos. It's insanity allowed to roam free. I am so glad you didn't buy any of this crap.
I don't know for sure, but something tells me the whole "women should submit to their husbands' dogma is negotiable for guy in the glasses. Hed probably wear a dog collar and get spanked with a newspaper for the right lady.
I think all of these dudes secretly crave a woman who'd force them to clean her Louboutins with their tongues.
So what does the bible say about the pool boy?
The Lord helps he who helps himself
"Yum yum!"
WAIT! Wives are supposed to submit, but if their husband tells them to dress provocatively they shouldn't do it?! I'm soooooo confused. 🤣
Wear the negligee, don't wear the negligee .....oh shucks.
This makes sense to me as the womans place is in the home to feed my malignant and fragile ego
Don't forgot the 13 children you force on her, you got to make sure she's fullfilled in her role of the lord's army. Can't have her slacking off now.
@@thehopelesspragmatic6701 Well. Yeah! We don't want the Muslims and yoga practitioners outbreeding us
Big missed opportunity on the editors part. I was so disappointed to have watched through this entire video and not see a single clip from Borat.
Brings back memories of my southern Baptist church preachers full of interpretive bs.
Not one to kink shame, but this makes my skin crawl.
Also, never wear clothes made of both linen and wool. ~ Leviticus 19:19
Isn't the Bible fun?
Nor of cloth made from the transformed bodies of algae, plants, and our brothers the Dinosaurs.
@@paineoftheworld amen
Unfortunately they have a response to that. Jesus told them in the New Testament that it's okay to forget all of the dietary and fashion rules, but to keep all the ones about pushing everyone else down to make yourself feel bigly.
@@adamfitch965 That's interesting, because Jesus also said in the New Testament that he didn't come to do away with a single one of the old laws, but to uphold them.
I wonder how they decide which versions of Jesus to listen to and which to ignore. 🤔
@@auntieheksold-timemedicine3045 I'm sure it depends on which ones they want to follow, and changes on their whim.
Jokes aside, this is one of those reasons I'm glad I'm not a religious kook. Ironically, the Fundamentalist Christian life seems more hellish than Hell itself
Nobody ever discusses that verse a few lines down about how slaves have to submit to their masters 🤔
Slaves during the Roman empire, the which is the context of that passage, were more like indentured servants, or paying off debt, not slaves as we know it in our modern context. It wasn't race based.
Christianity isn't about destroying social structures. There are other verses about this topic. Let's read this in context, not pick one out of the text, read it in our modern understanding, and run with it as if we've somehow surpassed the evidence for the resurrection
@@WeavyBoo Oh, cool. Well, wives in Roman times were legally the property of their fathers, who arranged marriages for them. Then they were mostly under their husband’s control. They couldn’t vote or hold office. Women have more freedom now and marriages aren’t like this in the modern western context, so we can ignore all the wifely submission stuff.
@@WeavyBoo And that makes it better how exactly????? No matter what fancy little term you want to use to dress it up. Slavery is slavery and any sort of slavery is objectively evil race based or not. Holding people against their will and forcing them to work for you is shitty in no matter what context you give it. Why are you trying to defend this shit so hard. God's not gonna fuck you bro. Christ!
@@WeavyBoo lol evidence for the resurrection - some people 2k years ago SAID a dead guy left his tomb. A large rock was moved (we've had the ability to move large rocks for thousands of years, that's how it was moved there). They just took his corpse out and said he came back to life. That kind of evidence would not meet basic standards in a court let alone what you should base your entire pathetic life around.
Christian women sure are vocal for people who aren't supposed to speak, and be submissive.
*sigh* stop ripping the Bible out of context. It's pathetic
@@WeavyBoo We know it's you Jim Bob Duggar you ain't slick
“Now let us turn to the Gospel of Beach Boys and learn of the parable of ‘Two Girls For Every Guy’…” 😂
Step one: Have half of all the Guys murder the other half.
A nightmare of biblical proportions. 500 years ago, these guys were burning women at the stake across Europe. Proof that misogyny - among other things - fuels fundamentalism, regardless of religion.
p.s. Undoubtedly, mother issues play a role, too. Imagine how much happier their wives would be if these guys saw a therapist once a week (or, ideally, twice).
Then again, as the saying goes, "How many therapists does it take to change a lightbulb?" A: None. The lightbulb has to want to change itself.
1:35 I got 8 inches of silicon that would beg to disagree
I can't bring myself to submit to any man who only shops at Moore's or Eddie Bauer. Dries me right up.
Sidenote - how are you gonna fight Satan dressed like Arnold Palmer?
😂😂😂
Just, wow. This is fantastic! I'm trying to -indoctrinate- teach my children, and this will help tremendously when I start playing it overnight each night, loudly on repeat through the ceiling speakers I installed in -the basement- their room. I just got them some sound insulation installed, for their collective birthday.
It was sure tough to pick which one to hate the most. Probably the young guys since they are who I envision when I read awful misogynist comments on news articles
It was you can't hit your wife like you can hit a child guy that earned my vitriol. Just casually admitting that he's a child abuser really sells it for me.
goddamn one of the most horrifying vids yall have published in a min
then you have never seen the everything is terrible:the great satan movie
im sure these guys are in one making these vids...comet ping pong like
Bibles wives, submit your submissions now.
Submit to your husband, but not if he wants you to dress sexy.
Great editing!
Yasss, the great Satan! Awesome work as usual!
I hate everything about these people.
Everything.
'hate' isn't a strong enough word
thats why everythingisterrible
I know a pastor just like this unfortunately
1:03 I didn't know Dane Cook's career had taken this much of a nose dive.
What could possibly go wrong??
The Duggars.
My Dark Lord, always be submitting.
Great pleasure can be found in submission. I wish I could find a woman willing to help me to submit.
@@ronnickels5193 , coffee is only for dominant women, and if you want steak knives, try to catch me in my El Dorado.
i need alec baldwin to come and point at a poster that says ABS so i can better understand
What are those???
These are the Glengarry Leeds….
🤛
🎀
🍆
This was so hard to watch lmao
dude in the black shirt with the US flag on it is days out from shooting up a grocery store. also i can't get over straight Tim Gunn.
He is the most poorly proportioned man I have ever seen. Dude looks like he is 2 feet tall and the set is actually just very tiny
My stepdad quoted this shit to my mom every day.
my Father did the same and he never deserved submission
Who do you submit to?
Everything is Terrible is a public service
Just remember, when in doubt: "t-bt t-bt t-bt t-bt t-bt!"
My wif: "ok, I SUBMIT!!!"
Me: *let's her out of the figure four*
You need to do one of Andrew Tate next
Tate's too busy crying while jerking off to this video
This scream! ❤️
The biblesutra
Where can I meet women that believe everything in these sermons?
Church
fetlife
0:07 huh, I bet that was a really short sermon.
I need a trip to the alcohol depot after this
Sheeple🐑
I was already atheist, but this made me double atheist
“Gods scary…. What are you gonna do against god when he’s throwing haymakers.”
The ONLY good point in this video.
what if the husband starts a-sinnin'
i called my wife in the room to watch this. After about 2 minutes her exact words were”oh f#$% off” and walked out. Now hopefully i wont be bothered the rest of the day and can play video games alone
I see what you did there
Whyves
that is scary
This is what it's like in Florida right now
And this is why I’m a lesbian
7:23 is that Bannon?!
I'm not sure, what's my role as a wife??
Who are these pastors?
Closeted homosexuals
Why does anyone have to know them? No need to make them more famous and worshipped.
I feel like all these guys (& gal) have a message to impart... I just wish it was more clear - that these poor congregations didn't have to read between the lines (w/e they are)
However, I have some cat poop if "someone" has a handy towel?
Edit: please know that all the above is/was/shall be sarcasm - except for the 😼💩
The dystopia of Evangelical christianity is so fucking blatant
How is this different from the Ayatollah?
Some men in the Bible had many wives. That would've been a challenge I'm sure. Especially once they got their hands on that feminist liter-a-ture and started shaving their heads and whatnot.
Is this a joke? Please explain what you think the setup, punchline, or funny thing about it is supposed to be. I would be fascinated
Guys in the Bible had many wives bc, despite no biblical support for doing it, their culture did it and they disobediently did so as well
@@mako3951they're mocking the people in the video, while also reinforcing the fact that they practiced polygamy, which is frowned upon by the majority of society and is often used to control and abuse women like in cults and fundamentalist religious sects.
amen!!!
I mean, of course it’s all men saying something like this
Not possible. Be like a sheep and you’ll see Christ! And yes, the angels like to watch….😮
Notice the plural multiple husbands and multiple wives.
This is why we got project 2025.
Are these sermons or just some guys getting up in front of people to show off their red flags?
Ewww!
As a women I will:
Submit
Submit my everything.
Submit my everything to my husband.
Try to understand what it means to submit like Jesus.
Dude, I need to get to church
Why are these sets so hideous?
Christian women physically submit to their husbands, but they emotionally abuse them to gain control; it's true abuse, it's harmful, and it's painful to see or experience
...but I thought Christianity and the bible was all about feminism!?
I am 100% certain that black shirt flag guy hits his wife. 100%.
I think the fuck not 😂😂😂
Increase the love.
I don't get it.
thats cuz your not submissive yet
Hmmmmmmmm I think there might be some funny business going on here
I'll stay single, TIA😜
If thats the case, Then why dose my parents church have a openly gay female pastor?
sadly not very submissive. God step in
You obliviously have entered into the incorrect congregation, therefore you are a sinner and are damned into the hell of eternal torment of watching Jerry McGuire until the last star of this universe extinguishes. May the Dark Lord be praised in his wisdom and punishments.
She took a black sharpie to the verses dealing with homosexuality. Problem solved
That's no church, it's a space station!
@Deerheart There is no try.
You don't need to spoon feed me the yellow context, thank you.
I already get it. 👍😎
Wives, click SUBMIT on my Venmo account.
Nah.
All women should submit to their men ? Hahaha 😂 try harder God
3:03 Those are the cries of the beta Male feminists disagreeing with the church elders.