Wow this is exactly what I'm dealing with. While also dealing with a supervisor that don't want me on his team. My previous supervisor retired and they joined our team together under the present leadership. 😮
@makeda.andrews Before I became a supervisor, I used to volunteer to assist his warehouse because of shortage. He would, in return, call my supervisor and lie and complain about my work ethic. I am an honest and overachiever employee. I applied for the next level position twice. He chose one candidate who was less experienced than me and a candidate who was well balanced in skill and decision making just as I am. When I applied the third, he told his employee that the decision would come down between me and the other employee he trained. During my interview for this current position, he was the only supervisor on the interview panel who did not choose me for my current position. Since I have come into my role, the organization has elevated me a step hire than what I was hired for. So it was nothing he could do about it. Every suggestion I have, he turns it down and then submits it as if he came up with. I request training, and he says it's possible, but he has to offer it to the entire team. Then he recommends other training to other employees.
I am dealing with this at work now. I am a Black woman serving a 95% Latino student population. Students AND staff regularly circumvent me and address their concerns to my male Latino coworker (with a lower job title) on matters that are directly related to MY role and not his. It’s extremely disheartening and exhausting.
well seems like you feel SUPERIOR to him..he may have the lower title but maybe you have a bad attitude and they feel more comfortable coming to him? I would normally sympathize but when you mentioned lower title as if you having a higher title automatically makes you the better option, leads me to believe that therein lies the problem
@@lotusgrl444 mentioning our different titles adds context that is very important here. There are procedures and chains of communication in the workplace for a reason. What I just described are racial/gender microaggressions. The pattern is that students feel more comfortable with a Latino. With no reference of my “bad attitude” as you assumed, students interacting with each of us even for the FIRST TIME, circumvent me and address their concerns with my coworker.
Just found this clip while I was searching to deal with a difficult employee, and this one hit the nail on the head. New re-org put me between a new manager and sr person used to report direct to him. Technically, this person is more senior than me, but does not have any managerial title nor experience, and knows how to play to corporate political game. I've been Sr. manager for a couple of years and in my way to be a director, I had similar experience before and did not end well. This time, armed with many experience including coaching ones, I'm going to deal with it in a different way, will see Thanks for your help
Yeah so then what if you end up constantly going to your boss and bringing these things up then wouldn’t that backfire on you as then you’d now be the one always complaining? Every time I addressing it it only got worse and even when I addressed it directly with the person undermining then stuff eventually escalated and now my boss is targeting me, undermining me and I am now the scapegoat of the office. Speaking up only made things worse, I guess I should have tried to get another job early on.
I have a coworker that has ways of holding up my work from being published (I'm in software development.) She has no idea I don't care, but I see what she's doing. I don't even care because there' so much work that I just deliver the needed project and forget about it being held up and just move on to the next project (she doesn't have control over all projects I work on). What I'm trying to figure out is what in the world is her issue. The best place to be is in a place where you simply don't care.... Years ago when I was younger and less experienced, it would have bothered me.
Root causes : No 1. : lack of trust? I dont think so, its ego mostly and feeling better than you No 2 : yes - i expressed it to them kindly softly assertively.. it doesn’t sink in No 3: yes - it was the case and I expressed the same to my manager
You're welcome Ivette. At this time, I'm not sure exactly when I'll be re-doing the masterclass. The goal is to do it at the end of the year. But if you are subscribed to the channel and on my email list you'll definitely be in the know. :)
So the first thing you say is that lack of trust is the likely reason. What about when the leader has already done the inner work and reflection, and done everything to mitigate this - welcoming that persons (and everyone’s) input and even acting on it, praising the person (especially in front of others), working hard to ensure workloads are quantifiably fair, remembering details of their personal lives and asking tnem about them, etc. what say you to that?? Because I find it odd how you say you’ve pretty much never experienced this, then you make a video about it as if you’re a first hand expert, and the first thing you say is that the likely reason for the underminers behavior is lack of trust in the one being undermined. What?! So you’re saying you’ve always been perceived as trustworthy? How high and mighty of you. You’re also wrong - the core of undermining is inflated ego/insecurity/jealousy. (If you didn’t catch on, I don’t trust you, so here I am undermining you. Guess that’s your fault) have a lovely day.
Also maybe consider if the lack of trust is due to incompetence on the managers part. It’s hard for team members to go to a leader they know doesn’t know the answers 90% of the time. Are you managing your time well and does the team feel supported? Lastly, not everyone is built to be a manager.
New subscriber here- from you opening up the floor to ACKNOWLEDGING how challenging this can be to make us feel seen and validated, to being RELATABLE by sharing your own experiences and offering SOLID advice- THANK YOU! Sooo glad i found you 🥹🫶🏼 Good bless you!😭🩷🩷
Thank you for specifying that undermining should be viewed as a performance issue. It certainly is!
Thank you! I am crying as you say " I'm sorry you have to deal with that"
Aww Lili I am sorry that this situation has pained you as it has. Know that you can get through this. And that I'm thinking of you.
Wow this is exactly what I'm dealing with. While also dealing with a supervisor that don't want me on his team. My previous supervisor retired and they joined our team together under the present leadership. 😮
I'm so sorry to hear that you're supervisor isn't making things easier on you. Can I ask why you feel as though he doesn't want you on the team?
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These kinds of situations are the worst. When a supervisor undermines you before your team continually, it gives the team a pass to just misbehave
@makeda.andrews Before I became a supervisor, I used to volunteer to assist his warehouse because of shortage. He would, in return, call my supervisor and lie and complain about my work ethic. I am an honest and overachiever employee. I applied for the next level position twice. He chose one candidate who was less experienced than me and a candidate who was well balanced in skill and decision making just as I am. When I applied the third, he told his employee that the decision would come down between me and the other employee he trained. During my interview for this current position, he was the only supervisor on the interview panel who did not choose me for my current position. Since I have come into my role, the organization has elevated me a step hire than what I was hired for. So it was nothing he could do about it.
Every suggestion I have, he turns it down and then submits it as if he came up with. I request training, and he says it's possible, but he has to offer it to the entire team.
Then he recommends other training to other employees.
I am dealing with this at work now. I am a Black woman serving a 95% Latino student population. Students AND staff regularly circumvent me and address their concerns to my male Latino coworker (with a lower job title) on matters that are directly related to MY role and not his. It’s extremely disheartening and exhausting.
well seems like you feel SUPERIOR to him..he may have the lower title but maybe you have a bad attitude and they feel more comfortable coming to him? I would normally sympathize but when you mentioned lower title as if you having a higher title automatically makes you the better option, leads me to believe that therein lies the problem
@@lotusgrl444 mentioning our different titles adds context that is very important here. There are procedures and chains of communication in the workplace for a reason. What I just described are racial/gender microaggressions. The pattern is that students feel more comfortable with a Latino. With no reference of my “bad attitude” as you assumed, students interacting with each of us even for the FIRST TIME, circumvent me and address their concerns with my coworker.
Very wise & practical advice. Always love your videos Mak!
Isabel!! Thank you ☺️
This was great. Sadly, im currently dealing with this while managing a new team, and senior leadership is not helping.
Just found this clip while I was searching to deal with a difficult employee, and this one hit the nail on the head. New re-org put me between a new manager and sr person used to report direct to him. Technically, this person is more senior than me, but does not have any managerial title nor experience, and knows how to play to corporate political game. I've been Sr. manager for a couple of years and in my way to be a director, I had similar experience before and did not end well. This time, armed with many experience including coaching ones, I'm going to deal with it in a different way, will see
Thanks for your help
Great content, been looking for something like this.😢
Thank you Marcos 😊
Yeah so then what if you end up constantly going to your boss and bringing these things up then wouldn’t that backfire on you as then you’d now be the one always complaining? Every time I addressing it it only got worse and even when I addressed it directly with the person undermining then stuff eventually escalated and now my boss is targeting me, undermining me and I am now the scapegoat of the office. Speaking up only made things worse, I guess I should have tried to get another job early on.
LOVE your top ❤
I have a coworker that has ways of holding up my work from being published (I'm in software development.) She has no idea I don't care, but I see what she's doing. I don't even care because there' so much work that I just deliver the needed project and forget about it being held up and just move on to the next project (she doesn't have control over all projects I work on). What I'm trying to figure out is what in the world is her issue. The best place to be is in a place where you simply don't care.... Years ago when I was younger and less experienced, it would have bothered me.
Root causes :
No 1. : lack of trust? I dont think so, its ego mostly and feeling better than you
No 2 : yes - i expressed it to them kindly softly assertively.. it doesn’t sink in
No 3: yes - it was the case and I expressed the same to my manager
Women really know the way of things another reason women should be praised they are the true originators of intuition
I love it, thank you. When will you have your masterclass?
You're welcome Ivette. At this time, I'm not sure exactly when I'll be re-doing the masterclass. The goal is to do it at the end of the year. But if you are subscribed to the channel and on my email list you'll definitely be in the know. :)
I’m saving this video.
I am too
Glad it was helpful. Let me know if there is any additional topic or insight that you're in need of that I can surface on the channel.
How can I get in touch for a consultation call?
Hi Vanessa, great question! You can find out more about NMA and book a call here : makedaandrews.com/nma
That's me 😢... it's so hard!!
So the first thing you say is that lack of trust is the likely reason. What about when the leader has already done the inner work and reflection, and done everything to mitigate this - welcoming that persons (and everyone’s) input and even acting on it, praising the person (especially in front of others), working hard to ensure workloads are quantifiably fair, remembering details of their personal lives and asking tnem about them, etc. what say you to that?? Because I find it odd how you say you’ve pretty much never experienced this, then you make a video about it as if you’re a first hand expert, and the first thing you say is that the likely reason for the underminers behavior is lack of trust in the one being undermined. What?! So you’re saying you’ve always been perceived as trustworthy? How high and mighty of you.
You’re also wrong - the core of undermining is inflated ego/insecurity/jealousy. (If you didn’t catch on, I don’t trust you, so here I am undermining you. Guess that’s your fault) have a lovely day.
Yes!
Thank you :)
Buddy 😘
You do right by your team then they do right by you.
Also maybe consider if the lack of trust is due to incompetence on the managers part. It’s hard for team members to go to a leader they know doesn’t know the answers 90% of the time. Are you managing your time well and does the team feel supported? Lastly, not everyone is built to be a manager.
Even the most senior managers sometimes make big mistakes, like assigning wrong projects to wrong people and then watching people fail!
New subscriber here- from you opening up the floor to ACKNOWLEDGING how challenging this can be to make us feel seen and validated, to being RELATABLE by sharing your own experiences and offering SOLID advice- THANK YOU! Sooo glad i found you 🥹🫶🏼 Good bless you!😭🩷🩷