Castles are Designed to Kill You

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  • Опубликовано: 22 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 4,5 тыс.

  • @JoshDurelofIOW
    @JoshDurelofIOW 4 года назад +4059

    Their design to kill only makes them more fantastic and whimsical, not less.

    • @jyessiterriaynt1131
      @jyessiterriaynt1131 4 года назад +166

      In a way yes but it’s ironic how castles are looked at as something glorious when back in those days they would’ve been looked at in a similar way we look at fighter jets

    • @hejalll
      @hejalll 4 года назад +30

      But how did he not mention gatehouses

    • @B20C0
      @B20C0 4 года назад +54

      Yes, there is a beauty in death not many understand.

    • @tristenmonkman7928
      @tristenmonkman7928 4 года назад +1

      @@jyessiterriaynt1131 p

    • @starfirejordan9875
      @starfirejordan9875 4 года назад +4

      @@B20C0 true

  • @nimfadoro1169
    @nimfadoro1169 4 года назад +4266

    “I have the high ground.”
    -“I’m left handed.”
    “Oh shi-“

    • @Yellowbuzz-ug6of
      @Yellowbuzz-ug6of 4 года назад +178

      Basically left handed people were gods from what I’m hearing 😏

    • @stewardoautumn8063
      @stewardoautumn8063 4 года назад +49

      Im getting princess bride vibes

    • @hyxl3r254
      @hyxl3r254 4 года назад +88

      @@Yellowbuzz-ug6of finally im special

    • @NoName-hx5gj
      @NoName-hx5gj 4 года назад +9

      @@hyxl3r254 needs

    • @alguemaleatorio8713
      @alguemaleatorio8713 4 года назад +54

      @@hyxl3r254 too .
      Let's go invade some castles, my left handed friend!

  • @ppbandit8832
    @ppbandit8832 3 года назад +3733

    THE FACT THAT THEY MADE THE STAIRS UNEVEN IS SO PETTY
    but also kinda genius

    • @Jack-kx5rf
      @Jack-kx5rf 2 года назад +315

      They did this in regular staircases too to combat witches. It was believed that witches couldn't understand offset stairs so they would fall and die. Killed a lot of old women that were then accused of being witches.

    • @dgo5051
      @dgo5051 2 года назад +145

      @@Jack-kx5rf having a uterus alone would make you a witch in medieval times 💀

    • @MattH-wg7ou
      @MattH-wg7ou 2 года назад +44

      Now we have broads who need attention saying (with a straight face) that they are actually witches lol.

    • @athena1491
      @athena1491 2 года назад +43

      @@MattH-wg7ou men can and are witches too, and its not typically some hocus pocus stuff where we think we'll set fire to something with our minds, its, spicy psychology,
      meditation and rituals for self care, and intention for like, focusing on what we want to happen and acting towards that happening. "I want to have a better financial situation, so im gonna sit down and focus on what I need to do to do that and then do those things."
      I'd much rather have people that practice self care in a way that works for them than some judgy jerk on the internet so, yeah have a lovely day... any witches wanna hang out?

    • @MattH-wg7ou
      @MattH-wg7ou 2 года назад +25

      @@athena1491 I thought that what you describe was just being a healthy well adjusted human being? Why is that being a witch?

  • @bengoodwin2141
    @bengoodwin2141 3 года назад +2534

    More specifically: it's designed to keep the people on the inside safe and people on the outside dead

  • @jherazob
    @jherazob 4 года назад +2490

    Bringing Shad in just to talk about machicolations was absolutely the best move

    • @matthewnichols7207
      @matthewnichols7207 4 года назад +65

      I love both those channels. Im always excited when a RUclipsr collaborates with a similar channel.

    • @goodyKoeln
      @goodyKoeln 4 года назад +87

      Probably cut out 2 hours from Shad talking to fit in the video. 😇

    • @NOMAD-qp3dd
      @NOMAD-qp3dd 4 года назад +6

      @@goodyKoeln 🤣😂

    • @tamurkhawaja7279
      @tamurkhawaja7279 4 года назад +8

      I knew it was coming

    • @davidnorth6670
      @davidnorth6670 4 года назад +8

      Would've been disappointing otherwise lol

  • @leosmith1522
    @leosmith1522 4 года назад +7444

    Little Fact, Left handed swordsmen were paid more than there right handed colleagues because they can fight up spiral staircases.

    • @donweatherwax9318
      @donweatherwax9318 4 года назад +840

      True - and it's amusing to imagine mercenary commanders recruiting, training, and developing lefthanders, like minor league baseball GMs:
      GM 1: Sirrah, my Dunkirk double-A siege squad shall storm the Tower of Witches next month, yet we sorely lack two strong setup men. Tell me, who canst thou offer me?
      GM 2: Good sir, I can spare yon veteran sword master -- oh, thou knowest him? Good... And for thy second man, behold! My newest prospect: this broad-armed, thick-skinned, _left-handed_ lad, whom I approached whilst he was robbing a group of--
      GM 1: Oh, a southpaw, eh? Very useful indeed, when clearing out towers with clock-wise staircases! Is't good with a kite shield? Fine... how's his footwork?
      GM 2: He's a mountain boy, so sure-footed, even on blood-soaked stumble-steps. And my good sir, wait till you see his dickoff move! I tell you, his high-pitched victims never see it coming!
      GM 1: I must have him. Wilt thou take three big halberd-men, and that far-sighted scorpion-aiming bloke?
      GM 2: Dost thou insult me, with thy trio of busted camp-followers and that squinty, slothful, scorpion-snapping sod! On the other hand... [sighs] I'll bite, _if_ you throw in that big blind trebuchet-cranker -- that huge bastard with his eyes gouged out, but arms like windlasses? Add him to the rest, by God, and thou shalt have my young southpaw to anchor thy five-man witching rotation.
      GM 1: Done! And I can't wait to see his dickoff move. It sounds fun, it does!

    • @salvadortoscano2534
      @salvadortoscano2534 4 года назад +89

      @@donweatherwax9318 I need more of this xD

    • @wildeast66
      @wildeast66 4 года назад +468

      This is not just because of the staircases. Left handed people have a lot of advantages in many fighting sports, especially with swords. Right handers are used and trained against right handers. Its difficult for them to fight against someone with the sword at same side. On the opposite, the lefthander is used to fight against righthanders.

    • @onemanarmyoma0155
      @onemanarmyoma0155 4 года назад +62

      @@wildeast66 One would have to be made left-handed by his parents, who would have had foreseen the baby would or had to become a swordsman....because other than that it doesn't offer much advantages in life to be left-handed.

    • @heavyweaponsscout9990
      @heavyweaponsscout9990 4 года назад +33

      Hahaha, left handed people rule. 💖

  • @dumbdude3103
    @dumbdude3103 4 года назад +2785

    First thought:
    "Castles and no Shad?"
    *Shad pops up*
    "There he is."

    • @gdragonlord749
      @gdragonlord749 3 года назад +111

      machicolations MACHICOLATIONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNS!!!!!

    • @joelcrafter43
      @joelcrafter43 3 года назад +14

      WAIT WHAT!? Okay I was about to click off now I gotta watch it.

    • @dillon7748
      @dillon7748 3 года назад +33

      @@EricDMMiller what does pronouncing a word slightly differently from how most people would have to do with comprehension of subject matter? Especially for an antiquated word that no one today would pronounce the same as people would have at the time when it was regularly referred to. I had a computer science teacher that pronounced Java with the first 'a' like 'apple' so I guess that means everything he taught me about the singleton design pattern was invalid

    • @dillon7748
      @dillon7748 3 года назад +32

      @@EricDMMiller that hasn't been my experience. He just seems to me like a guy who's passionate about certain things in medieval history and relays things he's learned and ideas he has about it. I'd be interested to know the things he's apparently getting horribly wrong if you could provide specific examples. I will say I specifically looked into the controversy about the arrow on the right side stuff and found the opposition to his claim/speculation pretty weak.

    • @HydraVolt12
      @HydraVolt12 3 года назад +19

      @@EricDMMiller >PragerU
      There it is. So which of his videos got you so butthurt?

  • @josejuanrosales3614
    @josejuanrosales3614 3 года назад +1089

    "Meanwhile when I build a castle in minecraft":
    How many blindspots do you want:
    "Yes"

    • @Archris17
      @Archris17 2 года назад +81

      There's also the issue that you're only one dude in Minecraft... And you're never going to really be defending against an attacking army... Or have anyone to assist you. Part of why I grew disillusioned with Minecraft was that no matter how pretty I made something, it never had a purpose.

    • @cobalius
      @cobalius 2 года назад +60

      Just build a castle like i do.. two cobblestone above each other, torch ontop.
      It's usually enough for the night.

    • @davidsplooge14
      @davidsplooge14 2 года назад +19

      @@Archris17 a hundred players servers

    • @wilmagregg3131
      @wilmagregg3131 2 года назад +27

      @@Archris17 actually you can now they added a new mob faction called Illagers that if you attack them WILL invade the next village you go to with a whole a army of dudes wizards archers calvary and all.
      made the building villages system so much more satisfying cause as you said they now actually had a purpose to DEFEND the village which now has diverse jobs and usefull resources.

    • @SephirothRyu
      @SephirothRyu 2 года назад +17

      In fairness, what constitutes an effective castle in minecraft is actually usually something made of obsidian. I am not too familiar with optimal shapes though, so you'd have to ask the 2b2t guys on that. Some of the closest things to spawn to actually survive any real length of time are apparently obsidian structures that were used in the server's various wars.

  • @xINVISIGOTHx
    @xINVISIGOTHx 4 года назад +3708

    When someone randomly assures you that they aren't a supervillain 🤔

    • @theblackbaron4119
      @theblackbaron4119 4 года назад +80

      Press *X* to doubt.

    • @Spiceodog
      @Spiceodog 4 года назад +46

      also Kyle * releases a cognitohazard onto the internet*

    • @teIekid
      @teIekid 4 года назад +26

      First time here, kid?

    • @EEEEeee2748
      @EEEEeee2748 4 года назад +13

      he did recently acquired radioactive material..., hm

    • @ChrisHolman
      @ChrisHolman 4 года назад +4

      X

  • @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache
    @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache 4 года назад +2826

    Castle videos: *Exist*
    Shadiversity: Now you're speaking my language.

    • @hugemango2011
      @hugemango2011 4 года назад +7

      Well, well, well...

    • @enigmus7962
      @enigmus7962 4 года назад +42

      It’s not a RUclips video without Just Some Guy without a Mustache, or Just Some Guy with a Mustache

    • @markandresen5107
      @markandresen5107 4 года назад +27

      MACHICOLATIONS!!!

    • @shrekwazowski8199
      @shrekwazowski8199 4 года назад +6

      Just Some Guy without a Mustache WHY THE HELL ARE YOU EVERYWHERE DUDE???

    • @ErykBeyk
      @ErykBeyk 4 года назад +2

      And you follow Shad too...

  • @kevind3974
    @kevind3974 4 года назад +829

    Original thought was “shad would want to see this”. Then I saw shad nodded and thought “machicolations”

    • @JuliusCaminus
      @JuliusCaminus 4 года назад +27

      I may have screamed it.

    • @omnitroph1501
      @omnitroph1501 4 года назад +43

      MACHICOLATIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONS!!!!!!!

    • @lukasjuszczak1664
      @lukasjuszczak1664 4 года назад +9

      I came here to talk about machivolations.
      Alas, late but might join as well.

    • @Biff_McFly
      @Biff_McFly 4 года назад +6

      I was thinking about him yelling that literally since the first shot that showed them

    • @aranavenger
      @aranavenger 4 года назад +5

      But What about Dragons?

  • @MysterySteve
    @MysterySteve 2 года назад +651

    Well, as a lefty, now I know that if I were to live in medieval times, I'd be much better at sieging than defending any given castle

    • @redsabre69
      @redsabre69 2 года назад +5

      same!

    • @ycy2428
      @ycy2428 2 года назад +54

      well we were kinda considered spawns of satan back then for that

    • @revenevan11
      @revenevan11 2 года назад

      Same here!

    • @whyarewestillhere8562
      @whyarewestillhere8562 Год назад +14

      @@ycy2428 warlords didn’t really care about that tho

    • @jakobwhaley5641
      @jakobwhaley5641 Год назад +3

      I'm ambidextrous so I can do both

  • @sigmascrub
    @sigmascrub 4 года назад +899

    "you know what one of my favorite castle death traps are?"
    me: *removes headphones*

    • @SonsOfLorgar
      @SonsOfLorgar 4 года назад +40

      Clever... this isn't your first torney, is it?

    • @aprettycoolname4839
      @aprettycoolname4839 4 года назад +9

      Castles are deathtraps too Just let Them starve

    • @grantbaugh2773
      @grantbaugh2773 4 года назад +16

      Yup. The second I knew Shad was involved with a video about castles I knew we were gonna get a headphone busting battlecry.

    • @cherrydragon3120
      @cherrydragon3120 4 года назад +5

      All good and fun but what about dragons?

    • @grantbaugh2773
      @grantbaugh2773 4 года назад +3

      @@cherrydragon3120 they've been defeated rightly by the ultimate weapon. Pommels!

  • @youssef-td2vb
    @youssef-td2vb 4 года назад +813

    Fun fact: water filled moats didn't have alligators, they were just how all of the castles residents disposed of their waste, mainly piss and fecal matter. This worked well as a defense mechanic for castles, because most people are hesitant to go through water filled with sewage waste and hurt their morale. Water filled moats also were a good deterrent because anyone going through was much more likely to develop an illness and die. Thus the myth was started.

    • @MonkeyJedi99
      @MonkeyJedi99 4 года назад +130

      Who needs moat monsters when you have moat biomes!

    • @Acepunydefoc
      @Acepunydefoc 4 года назад +72

      Also made it more difficult to get ladders and other climbing devices to the walls. If you added a draw bridge it also highly difficulted direct attack to the door.

    • @dojando6003
      @dojando6003 4 года назад +87

      another fun fact, most castles didn't have moats since they were build on hills to defend the castle more easily. Only on flat land they needed another kind of defense since they did not have the high ground. But even than it was very well considered if a moat was necessary since it was a huge cost in money and labor force to not just build a castle bit to dig up a moat that would actually be useful as a defense. 🤓 xD

    • @zinn7733
      @zinn7733 4 года назад +21

      @@dojando6003 so you're telling me obi-wan had it right this whole time? I always thought that high ground jive was just a bunch of mumbo jumbo

    • @ABadassDragon
      @ABadassDragon 4 года назад +39

      @@zinn7733 The power of the high ground has no equal

  • @GianKout20
    @GianKout20 4 года назад +475

    -"Tristan why did you build these stairs is such a strange manner?"
    -"To stabby stabby murder murder downwards."

    • @chasesan
      @chasesan 4 года назад +14

      Well, why didn't you just say so in the first place.

    • @creeperizak8971
      @creeperizak8971 4 года назад +8

      To make stair stabs easier, of course!

    • @ismata3274
      @ismata3274 4 года назад +2

      So this is where the high grounds advantage started?

  • @maxlashley5672
    @maxlashley5672 2 года назад +329

    I was in a castle tour in germany a few years back, and one of the things they told us about was the holes in the ceiling of the tunnel the main entrance was in, which would be used for arrows obviously, but also a lot of boiling oil or wax to be poured onto attackers when they breach the gate. I'm guessing boiling oil was also used in the murder hole looking over the walls

    • @EdwardIkorMusic
      @EdwardIkorMusic 2 года назад

      The oil tossing is actually a myth. It was too expensive at the time to chuck oil, so they'd throw boiling animal fat instead

    • @samueldurazzo5312
      @samueldurazzo5312 2 года назад +52

      I thought boiling oil was a debunked myth? Too expensive, time consuming and unmaneuverable in a siege to be viable? Maybe just pots of boiling water?

    • @nubreed13
      @nubreed13 2 года назад +52

      They rarely dumped boiled oil. They would however dump hot water or sand on you.

    • @nextlifeonearth
      @nextlifeonearth 2 года назад +44

      Murder holes are actually another kind of trap, not part of machiculations.
      A murder hole is typically what they put in an enclosed space between two gates, They would keep the first gate open and the second closed to lure in the enemy soldiers. Then they close the first gate and in the ceiling there would be a hole (this is the murder hole) where they would sometimes poor down burning liquids (don't forget tree pitch, which was comparatively easier to obtain than oil or wax), but more often just heavy rocks and arrows and some nasty words to boot.

    • @redsabre69
      @redsabre69 2 года назад +14

      @@nextlifeonearth Damn enemy defenders and their harsh language... (shakes fist)

  • @Vex-sn7ne
    @Vex-sn7ne 4 года назад +686

    “You have all the room to stabby stabby downwards.”-Kyle 2020

    • @ViewtifulZeke
      @ViewtifulZeke 4 года назад +30

      "stabby stabby, murder murder"

    • @Vgamer311
      @Vgamer311 4 года назад +15

      “Sweet, sweet, fleshy flesh.”

    • @alphagt62
      @alphagt62 4 года назад +5

      “I’m not a Super Villain”. I’m not so sure I believe him?

    • @thiagothebaldi4255
      @thiagothebaldi4255 4 года назад +8

      "murder maximization"
      This is probably the episode with the most Kyle supervillanic lines.

    • @CT-Wrecker
      @CT-Wrecker 4 года назад +3

      Stabby Stabby MURDER MURDER

  • @thelonesniper6292
    @thelonesniper6292 4 года назад +1135

    "I remember when imperial walls and towers made me feel safe."

    • @charlesholliday9594
      @charlesholliday9594 4 года назад +41

      If you're not attacking them they should.

    • @thelonesniper6292
      @thelonesniper6292 4 года назад +86

      @@charlesholliday9594 Damn Imperial. Ulfric Stormcloak will reign as true High King of Skyrim!

    • @justehgamer
      @justehgamer 3 года назад +48

      I wonder whether vilod is still making that mead with juniper berries mixed in

    • @kevinboehm8346
      @kevinboehm8346 3 года назад +24

      Oh good, you’re finally awake...

    • @diegovalverde5080
      @diegovalverde5080 3 года назад +8

      THIS NEEDS MORE ATTENTION LMAOO

  • @nathancarter8239
    @nathancarter8239 4 года назад +1710

    Me, upon seeing a castle/medieval episode from a RUclipsr: "I wonder if Shad will show up in this episode."

    • @iwistudio7337
      @iwistudio7337 4 года назад +49

      My thought exactly

    • @thelairofthereaper4619
      @thelairofthereaper4619 4 года назад +100

      SAME! I saw this and was straight up, out loud, "If Kyle doesn't have a Shad cameo screaming MACHICOLATIONS then i am going to be sad"

    • @MasonRHarper
      @MasonRHarper 4 года назад +5

      Me too

    • @andrewolson5471
      @andrewolson5471 4 года назад +12

      @@thelairofthereaper4619 We can now all be happy.

    • @fcolon4
      @fcolon4 4 года назад +8

      Matriculations!!!!!!!

  • @gedu7653
    @gedu7653 3 года назад +98

    Don't forget about castles in other cultures! In Japan the castles had a lot of steps for example that went up to the castle. Like the steps you explained to be so random to make you trip, but in a way bigger scale, leading up to the castle itself!

    • @VoltisArt
      @VoltisArt Год назад +12

      England and Japan both have their share of nasty hills where you could funnel enemies into awkward spots because the other sides are just too hard to climb. Certainly not every stronghold had that advantage, but those who could find it, used it.

  • @mattcarlson6047
    @mattcarlson6047 4 года назад +211

    Kyle I think you made a misstep. Right after Shad finished explaining machicolations you called them murder holes, which are very different things. See castle gatehouses usually have 2 gates, so that if attackers get through one gate they have to immediately get through a second. (Same philosophy as the outer walls and killing fields) Murder holes are holes in the ceiling between those two gates where defenders could pour hot oil, or tar down on attackers while they try and breach the second gate. Another sick death trap for sure, but different from machicolations.

    • @gliesegliese1411
      @gliesegliese1411 4 года назад +30

      Tar and oil were far too expensive for that purpose, however boiling water did the trick just fine

    • @dahobdahob
      @dahobdahob 4 года назад +29

      @@gliesegliese1411 Also heated sand

    • @The_Tactical_Taco
      @The_Tactical_Taco 4 года назад +18

      @@dahobdahob If high enough a large rock would even do the trick. Don't even need to heat them and they can be reused next time.

    • @Sparklyrelic1518
      @Sparklyrelic1518 4 года назад +8

      Another common tactic was to shoot arrows through them, oil was too expensive to waste

    • @falsebeliever8079
      @falsebeliever8079 4 года назад +4

      During the fourteenth century the British dropped frag grenades and napalm.

  • @RicikXHromik
    @RicikXHromik 4 года назад +114

    Shad was screaming in my head "machicolations!!!" before he showed up. Awesome suprise colab!

    • @NOMAD-qp3dd
      @NOMAD-qp3dd 4 года назад +1

      Yea at the start of the video i thought, "oh he's just begging for a response video from Shad isn't he?"
      🤣😂🤣 a couple of my fav tubers right here, it's a good friday.

    • @toropazzoide
      @toropazzoide 4 года назад +2

      In your head? He was screaming it in our heart.

  • @CarBENbased
    @CarBENbased 4 года назад +629

    Me: Waits for Kyle to say "Machicolations!"
    Kyle: *Gets Shad to do it*
    Me: *Happy surprised Pikachu face*

    • @salvadortoscano2534
      @salvadortoscano2534 4 года назад +9

      He said crenelations, I'm with you, bro xD Kyle should've said it, it's fun!!

    • @smolselene9453
      @smolselene9453 4 года назад +3

      And then he opted for murder holes.

  • @DaVeganZombie
    @DaVeganZombie 3 года назад +316

    The moment you said “crennelation “ in the intro. I thought “man I hope Shad comes on to scream “MACHICOLATIONS!”
    I was not disappointed.

  • @SixofQueens
    @SixofQueens 4 года назад +611

    God do I love seeing how Shad has grown into the public consciousness, at least as far as RUclips is concerned. This man almost singlehandedly challenged and changed (from my perspective) the word of archery when he reasonably questioned and then experimented with shooting an arrow (specifically three finger draw, Mediterranean style) on the outside of the bow rather than the inside based on evidence from Medieval artwork and logical deduction, which in modern times was deemed IMPOSSIBLE or at the very least too dangerous and inaccurate to even be worth attempting.

    • @Boold198891
      @Boold198891 4 года назад +10

      I know what u did there :D

    • @venoltar
      @venoltar 4 года назад +31

      Oh god, I can hear the sounds of angry archer keyboard warriors on their way over already.

    • @SixofQueens
      @SixofQueens 4 года назад +15

      @@venoltar Let them. More people that we can show the Shad way!

    • @toxicdermyillunary4103
      @toxicdermyillunary4103 4 года назад +7

      @@SixofQueens The Chad way

    • @MrWhiteVzla
      @MrWhiteVzla 4 года назад +16

      MACHICOLATIONS!

  • @1AmGroot
    @1AmGroot 4 года назад +570

    Kyle: makes a video about castles
    Shad: did somebody say... MACHICOLATIONS!!!

    • @scottydu81
      @scottydu81 3 года назад +4

      Kyle: makes a video about enrolling in college
      Shad: did shumone shay…
      MACHICHICHACHINS!!!

  • @mistertwister2000
    @mistertwister2000 4 года назад +568

    Kyle: So for my next video I want to cover castl-
    Shadiverisity: *heavy breathing*

    • @Darkkmos
      @Darkkmos 4 года назад +48

      M A C H I C O L A T I O N S

    • @rollochairbreaker230
      @rollochairbreaker230 4 года назад +6

      But what about dragons?

    • @henrypaleveda7760
      @henrypaleveda7760 4 года назад +2

      "machiculation?"

    • @orionfoxx1954
      @orionfoxx1954 4 года назад +1

      Rollo Chairbreaker he did mention dragons

    • @NimaFoell
      @NimaFoell 3 года назад

      @MisterTwister too soon... much too soon (hardcore Shad fans will know what I mean)

  • @niffwasau1815
    @niffwasau1815 3 года назад +276

    “I’m not a supervillian” yet you made Roko’s basilisk okay, but I’m happy to work for you

    • @Yashael341
      @Yashael341 3 года назад +7

      That was my immediate thought exactly. Always happy to find another twisted mind.

    • @AlechiaTheWitch
      @AlechiaTheWitch 3 года назад +3

      I don't worry bout roko. With how my generation is going. I will be dead by the time we get there. We are still fighting over colours basically. Mhmhm red and blue. And if i am wrong well ok. Consequentialist philosophy. And if everybody thought like this roko might not exist at all. But the prisoners dilemma comes into play as well. There is a lot of factors. But roko might not know because by this philosophy he wont exist by my death.

    • @louisrobitaille5810
      @louisrobitaille5810 Год назад +1

      He didn't make Roko's basilisk, he only spread its concept. It's not like it's the worst thought experiment there is about "do this or else you'll suffer" out there. In a way, Pascal's wager is one such thought experiment 🤔.

    • @juanpabloflores8179
      @juanpabloflores8179 Год назад

      I was tempted to watch that video, but I read the comments, without spoiling much, and desist. You can't "unknown" what you know (well, you could technically have amnesia). As Cipher said in "The Matrix", 'ignorance is bliss'.

  • @elderblackdragon
    @elderblackdragon 4 года назад +360

    "I'm NOT a supervillian!" Kyle nearly every episode.
    How's that line from Hamlet go? "The lady doth protest too much, methinks."

  • @ericstoverink6579
    @ericstoverink6579 4 года назад +1663

    Shad: Explains Machicolations and what they are and what they are called.
    Kyle: IMMEDIATELY refers to them as Murder Holes
    Shad: Shakes head sadly.

    • @Goblinoiddoof
      @Goblinoiddoof 3 года назад +99

      Especially since a Murder Hole is a completely different part of the defence

    • @georgedavey1339
      @georgedavey1339 3 года назад +24

      Murder holes are the "fancy windows" or slits in the stone walls. You will see them on most saxon churches for some reason.

    • @NaoyaYami
      @NaoyaYami 3 года назад +76

      @@georgedavey1339 Murder holes are completely different part of defense - they are holes in the ceiling that defenders use to shoot attackers that got past exterior defenses and are now inside the keep/tower.

    • @georgedavey1339
      @georgedavey1339 3 года назад

      @@NaoyaYami dude im from England we have a rich history of castles and keeps. We know what murder holes are.

    • @NaoyaYami
      @NaoyaYami 3 года назад +39

      @@georgedavey1339 You being from England doesn't mean anything, really.

  • @SeRgEaNt_RaNdOm
    @SeRgEaNt_RaNdOm 4 года назад +69

    As a fan of both Shad and Kyle I could not be happier at this collab, especially the MACHICOLATIONS!!!!! part

  • @mischarowe
    @mischarowe 2 года назад +41

    3:54 Ever since I learned about Arrow Slits, every time I play a game I look for such things to shoot through. It opens a whole world of fun.

    • @madtechnocrat9234
      @madtechnocrat9234 Год назад

      wait till you learn about murder holes

    • @mischarowe
      @mischarowe Год назад

      @@madtechnocrat9234 Just googled it. Yikes.

    • @random58585
      @random58585 Год назад

      You don't deserve oxygen

  • @GameTimeWhy
    @GameTimeWhy 4 года назад +117

    Thats really cool you got Shad on here.

  • @doctorwhoinfinite
    @doctorwhoinfinite 4 года назад +103

    *sees Kyle made a video about castles*
    Shadiversity will either hate or love this
    *sees Shad is the guest to talk about machicolations*
    Nice

  • @torfinnzempel6123
    @torfinnzempel6123 4 года назад +209

    A couple of correction for you Kyle.
    1. Star Forts were invented in the era of gun powder so no archers. Just rifleman and cannons. Also, Star Forts are, as the name implies, forts, not castles. Though they are interesting to talk about.
    2. Those merlons where too short. They would be as tall as a standing soldier. If you had to croutch (as you were) then they are not realistic or historically accurate. Since seiges would last for days to months (and in a few cases years) try squating for any prolonged period and you will find you can't. Hence, merlons had to be as tall as the soldiers they were ment to protect, or else they provided no protection. (See Shadiversity's merlons for what propery proprtioned merlons should look like)
    3. Murder holes refered specifically to the holes inside the gate houses from which arrows, rocks spears, burning hot oils etc., would have access to attackers stuck inside the gate house. They did not refer to the machicolations.
    4. This is more of an omission, but you left out how the gate houses were built to be murder factories. Castles didn't have one big door that you opened to go through to enter the castle courtyard (no matter how much hollywood wants you to believe this). They had 2 sets of doors (or gates), so the gate house would protrude out from the wall, with a door on the outside and one on the inside. Between the two doors would be the kill box where attackers would get trapped until they could break through the inner door. One castle I visited had the floor of the gate house slope down after the outer door, until about half way through the gate house, then it sloped up and angled sharply to the left about 30-40 degrees until you got to the inner gate/door. This was to prevent an attacker from being able to use a battering ram on both doors.

    • @bradeki2997
      @bradeki2997 4 года назад +32

      Me: comes to comments section to make a couple corrections.
      Torfinn: I got this.

    • @torfinnzempel6123
      @torfinnzempel6123 4 года назад +5

      @@bradeki2997 thanks!

    • @zerberus_ms
      @zerberus_ms 4 года назад +19

      A very nice comment although I will have to correct you on a tiny misconsption
      Burning oil was seldomly used for that
      They usually poured boiling water or hot sand (it's very effective and unlike the oil variant - cheap)

    • @torfinnzempel6123
      @torfinnzempel6123 4 года назад +8

      @@zerberus_ms good catch. Thanks!

    • @elproson1
      @elproson1 4 года назад +2

      I love the kill box between the gates. I was wondering if he would talk about it.

  • @hawkenparker
    @hawkenparker 4 года назад +143

    When I went to England (I'm from texas) I was REALLY surprised by how smart their castle creation was. I almost died on the steps, you can't fit two people side by side on most staircases, (I'm also 6'6" [198cm]) the little porthole thingies at the top of castles are so freaking small i thought I was going to get stuck, so the odds of a man with a sword and board and all that armor making it through would REALLY suck, and it would funnel them into a single file. Brilliant guys, really really brilliant. (Also, those spiral staircases made me motion sick...)

    • @shaggybaggums
      @shaggybaggums Год назад +5

      I was going to comment on how we spent quite a while poking holes in each other, first with sticks, then with sticks made of better stuff and devices to fire pointy sticks.
      There was then going to be a comment of the evolution of the defences we came up with to counter those using combinations of earth, wood, and stone, but I was interrupted by the realisation that a firearm is just an advanced way of launching the pointy part of a metal stick at someone.
      So I forgot about the castle part, but I'm sure it was going to be good. Probably not worth the two year wait though, sorry.
      Seriously though, I found your comment about the width of the stair cases very interesting. I've been annoyed by them myself on various school trips while trying to walk up them with someone while talking to them.
      It never even occurred to me at the time that there would be a very deliberate reason for this, nice observation.

    • @Nick-ij5nt
      @Nick-ij5nt Год назад +4

      Tbf though it would've been A LOT easier for the people living back then. The average male height in medieval Europe was like 5'7(170cm).

    • @shaggybaggums
      @shaggybaggums Год назад

      @@Nick-ij5nt I used to love seeing the doorways of old buildings, almost comically small.

    • @Nick-ij5nt
      @Nick-ij5nt Год назад +1

      @@shaggybaggums But now it's the opposite lol. All the doors where I live are like 7ft tall even though people that tall are like 0.00001% of the population.

  • @deepfriedsalt567
    @deepfriedsalt567 4 года назад +167

    I still feels whimsy and wonder when visiting a castle, however it is precisely because they are absolute meat blenders.

  • @Hawkwolf1017
    @Hawkwolf1017 4 года назад +63

    Before I saw the description I was thinking "Man I wonder if he talked to shad about this."

  • @AntExe-ey5my
    @AntExe-ey5my 4 года назад +305

    Aria : "Yeah! Metal Rules!"
    We'll she's an advanced AI so she can't be wrong.

    • @gingermcgingin1733
      @gingermcgingin1733 4 года назад +7

      The question is, what kind rules the most? Heavy, Extreme, Thrash, Power, Black, Doom, Death, Sludge, Progressive...

    • @seanla38
      @seanla38 4 года назад +3

      @@gingermcgingin1733 all of thee above 🎸

    • @drigondii
      @drigondii 4 года назад +1

      Has Aria been hanging out with Aletheia?

    • @jerryonlychild7003
      @jerryonlychild7003 4 года назад +1

      Well definitely not doom...that’s for sure..heavy,thrash,power, hardcore for sure. But no, definitely not doom..definitely not..

    • @deemcgann1695
      @deemcgann1695 4 года назад +1

      Ginger McGingin don’t worry...if he was a supervillain、he wouldn’t have said he wasnt

  • @6Just6Stan6
    @6Just6Stan6 4 года назад +69

    The staircase going to the right has always been my favorite about castles. I learned that at a young age and feel in love with that.

    • @AscendancyLF
      @AscendancyLF Год назад +2

      It's also just a myth. No idea why Kyle presents it like a fact.
      First of all: These types of stairs are VERY RARE in castles. Most don't even have them. Also the amount of these stairs that go clockwise or counterclockwise is 50/50. So why did they not just build all clockwise if they are so "effective"?
      There are even more things that disproof this.
      Sorry to burst your bubble and yes, i am fun at parties.

  • @ABadassDragon
    @ABadassDragon 4 года назад +253

    Anyone watching Shadiversity:
    *laughs in machicolations*
    Edit: commented before i saw Shad was in the episode. My 2 favourite creators doing a collab? Awesome!

    • @shoootme
      @shoootme 4 года назад +8

      MACHICOLATION!!!

    • @metakillz3532
      @metakillz3532 4 года назад +3

      SAMEEE

    • @Talenel
      @Talenel 4 года назад +10

      As soon as I saw it was a video about castles, my first thought was, "Huh, I wonder if he talked to Shad."
      Yep, he sure did.

    • @tatuvarvemaa5314
      @tatuvarvemaa5314 4 года назад +3

      Exactly what I thought, than my brain went straight to Sam o’ Nella.
      Its like one of those kids play grounds courses at Mc Donalds.

    • @davidgumazon
      @davidgumazon 4 года назад +2

      Now I just realized Anime/Manga/Web Novel their Castles are all trash. EZ to breach.

  • @jayberkovitz6783
    @jayberkovitz6783 4 года назад +265

    "I'm not a supervillian", exactly what a supervillian would say...

    • @cliffordsherman7702
      @cliffordsherman7702 4 года назад +5

      Jay Berkovitz he really wants to emphasize his non supervillaininess so much it makes me begin to wonder.

    • @peters2928
      @peters2928 4 года назад +3

      Megamind would disagree

    • @kgmotte2363
      @kgmotte2363 4 года назад +5

      I Mean... He Has a Giant Evil Science Lair, he has Armies of Minions, he has an enslaved Sentient AI Running the place, he Has Access to several Doomsday weapons, he has a Mad Science lab, he has a Genetic Aberration Zoo, Deathtrap defenses.... If it Walks like a Duck, Quacks like a Duck, Looks like a Duck....

    • @cliffordsherman7702
      @cliffordsherman7702 4 года назад +2

      KG Motte look I mean yes he has looked into faster than light guillotines and tricked many into gazing at the basilisk but I mean when you come down to it who hasn’t?

    • @kgmotte2363
      @kgmotte2363 4 года назад +2

      @@cliffordsherman7702 Hhmmhhmm Hhmm hmm....
      *Quietly Adds Your Name to a list of Potential Super-Villains to Look into for future Employment as a Lackey*

  • @widgren87
    @widgren87 4 года назад +842

    Anyone else hearing a distant cry of "MachicolatioooooonnnsssAHH!!", or is it just me?
    Note to self, watch entire video before making jokes... Still Kyle and Shad in a video about castles :-)

    • @widgren87
      @widgren87 4 года назад +13

      @@santiagofaiella1255 And swords ;-)

    • @TheCompleteMental
      @TheCompleteMental 4 года назад +11

      Let's see if Shadfacts shows up

    • @widgren87
      @widgren87 4 года назад +4

      @@santiagofaiella1255 Versatile enough you could imagine it being invented in Switzerland :-)

    • @widgren87
      @widgren87 4 года назад

      @@santiagofaiella1255 Oh that made me laugh, ouch my face :-)

    • @johan.ohgren
      @johan.ohgren 4 года назад +4

      The Shad legion has arrived I see..

  • @9600bauds
    @9600bauds Год назад +21

    another cool detail: the reason why castle towers are round is that attackers figured out you can really wreck any square building by digging underneath the corners. by having round towers at the corners you're depriving your enemy of any weak points to dig under

  • @georgeboswell4319
    @georgeboswell4319 4 года назад +317

    Rimworld player: Write that down WRITE THAT DOWN

  • @elvis_mello
    @elvis_mello 4 года назад +84

    I was like "When is he going to talk about Machicolations?"
    Then Shad came

  • @narcolepticaxolotl4970
    @narcolepticaxolotl4970 4 года назад +743

    Nobody:
    Shadiversity viewers: MACHICHOLATIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNSSAAAAHHhhh

    • @salvadortoscano2534
      @salvadortoscano2534 4 года назад +3

      Hi :D

    • @orionfoxx1954
      @orionfoxx1954 4 года назад +2

      Yep

    • @Maninawig
      @Maninawig 4 года назад +11

      Cute axlotl.
      What would have been icing on the cake would be Jazza running up with his Machickyulashuuuns shirt.

    • @narcolepticaxolotl4970
      @narcolepticaxolotl4970 4 года назад +5

      @@Maninawig Yessss!

    • @lolloblue9646
      @lolloblue9646 4 года назад +4

      Did somebody say MACHICOLATIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONZAH!

  • @sekirk
    @sekirk 3 года назад +48

    I’d love a second part to this with more info on other ways they’d defend a castle. Like how they would also use that trap entrance to pour searing hot oil or pitch onto attackers

    • @somesillydude
      @somesillydude 2 года назад +5

      Hot oil, tar or pitch is a myth. Boiling water is more likely. Oil and such is way too expensive, today still, to just waste on throwing on attackers.

    • @somesillydude
      @somesillydude 2 года назад +4

      Oh and just plain big rocks, dont forget about those, they are cheap and dangerous!

    • @VoltisArt
      @VoltisArt Год назад +1

      @@somesillydude you might be surprised at how much oil modern militaries use on attackers. More than one way to "throw." Fuel, material processing, paint, trade sanctions...and that's all just petroleum. Don't have to go back that many years to when napalm was popular for a while, still modern times. One's army has to eat between battles, too.

    • @pro-lapser
      @pro-lapser Год назад

      ​@@somesillydudeAn F15 or a millitary grade heli are way more expensive than some litres of oil and you still see them being thrown around like paper planes during wars, because wars don't happen every week. Similarly, castles weren't being sieged on a daily basis, they could very easily afford to stack up on some oil between sieges

  • @RockinMonkey
    @RockinMonkey 4 года назад +343

    Kyle: “...I’m not a villain”
    Me: Nope, just store brand Aquaman.

    • @MassiveKreutz
      @MassiveKreutz 4 года назад +12

      Let's just hope Amber Bedshitter isn't around to beat him up!

    • @cherrydragon3120
      @cherrydragon3120 4 года назад +1

      Hahahaha 😂😂😂

    • @erikbarrett85
      @erikbarrett85 4 года назад +4

      Store brand Chris Hemsworth

    • @erikbarrett85
      @erikbarrett85 4 года назад +1

      There's NO WAY he's not basing his look on Chris Hemsworth.

    • @IJustAteYourGrapesBro
      @IJustAteYourGrapesBro 3 года назад +1

      @@erikbarrett85 look, Chris Hemsworth forgot to hit the jump button in time and got nailed by a goomba, now he needs to get the mushroom so he can power back up, BACK OFF!

  • @SickoFromHell
    @SickoFromHell 4 года назад +165

    Arrowslits in French is called "Meurtrière" its literally means murdering

    • @SickoFromHell
      @SickoFromHell 4 года назад +7

      @Zacharie Boivin Aaaactually, meurtrière is the feminine of murderer

    • @luketufts6827
      @luketufts6827 4 года назад +5

      @john Mullholand murder holes are something different, actually.

    • @luketufts6827
      @luketufts6827 4 года назад +1

      @john Mullholand 👌

    • @Batman_the_bad_man
      @Batman_the_bad_man 4 года назад

      @Zacharie Boivin murdering (infinitive) = tuer in french

    • @cherrydragon3120
      @cherrydragon3120 4 года назад

      Nice

  • @leodoz1016
    @leodoz1016 4 года назад +136

    Video: a castle is mentioned
    Shad: It's free real estate

  • @kungfuskull
    @kungfuskull 3 года назад +48

    I like to think that a thousand years from now, AA towers and such will be seen similarly made cute by pop culture

    • @bjboss1119
      @bjboss1119 2 года назад +1

      I'd like to see someone make bullets cute in the next thousand years....
      We're already halfway there!

    • @ideallyyours
      @ideallyyours Год назад

      @@bjboss1119 Bullet Bill

    • @TechnoMinarchist
      @TechnoMinarchist Год назад

      ​@@bjboss1119 Skippy from Cyberpunk 2077.

  • @onerbreziar
    @onerbreziar 4 года назад +193

    heheheh Right on the begining I thought to myself "we should call Shad here".... and then... "
    Machicolations!!!!!"

    • @sagagis
      @sagagis 4 года назад +2

      damn, I am 10 mins late for commenting about Shadiversity :D

    • @jtbwilliams
      @jtbwilliams 4 года назад +3

      I was about to ask what about dragons?

    • @auntieaoife
      @auntieaoife 4 года назад +3

      I nodded off while watching and I woke up and saw Shad and I was like "why is Shad here and where did Kyle go?"

    • @AgentX2006
      @AgentX2006 4 года назад +1

      Same. From the beginning of the episode all I could hear in my head is Shad screaming "Machicolations!"

  • @troyhoffman9411
    @troyhoffman9411 4 года назад +42

    4:17 - "These crown-like elements allowed defenders to expose as little of themselves as possible (phrasing)." Gotta love an Archer reference when talking about archers. I love it!

  • @momqabt
    @momqabt 4 года назад +107

    Before the vid starts: duh...it's designed to be defended against overwhelming forces. Unlike total war warhammer
    Edit: also don't forget gatehouses, murder holes, inward facing archery slits...

    • @WackadoodleMalarkey
      @WackadoodleMalarkey 4 года назад +1

      Yes yes, just give to ratling gunners!

    • @alphagt62
      @alphagt62 4 года назад +3

      And what about hot oil spouts, and bolder dropping trap doors over your head.

    • @natehammar7353
      @natehammar7353 4 года назад +5

      alphagt62 There is actually little evidence of the use of “boiling oil”. Oil and/or pitch was used against rams and siege towers, but it would have been too valuable to use against troops (plus setting people on fire inside a building with at least some wooden parts is really bad). Hot sand or boiling water is generally accepted as the most likely stuff to be dumped on attackers.

  • @nathanielgrey4091
    @nathanielgrey4091 3 года назад +20

    It is amazing that castles ever fell. A testament to the siege tools and tactics

    • @VoltisArt
      @VoltisArt Год назад +6

      Most of them fell, because they weren't made of fancy well-engineered stonework. Most castles were wood and other common building materials that rarely last centuries. Some have walls of hand-placed rocks somewhat still standing to show us where they used to be.

    • @RustyDust101
      @RustyDust101 Год назад +8

      Rarely by being stormed, but by being starved out.

  • @666tonsofsquirrels
    @666tonsofsquirrels 4 года назад +89

    2:38 "Yea, metal rules" made me very happy.

  • @hurricane9634
    @hurricane9634 4 года назад +213

    People when castle existed must have been: *everywhere I go, I see a trap*

    • @crimsonraen
      @crimsonraen 4 года назад +4

      I think more likely, most people just didn't think of them in their every day life.. Although there were probably still those who didn't tarry when walking under murder holes and such. :)

    • @TheAuron32
      @TheAuron32 4 года назад +4

      much like the internet today...

    • @juke9674
      @juke9674 4 года назад +3

      Visiting thailand like

    • @bananatorpedo275
      @bananatorpedo275 4 года назад

      RenegadeMastah ohh so that what trap nation means

    • @dboot8886
      @dboot8886 4 года назад

      I'm a BEE Hah! I wish!

  • @Nerobyrne
    @Nerobyrne 4 года назад +126

    The best siege:
    "Let me in!"
    "No."
    "Okay then"

    • @Mrraerae
      @Mrraerae 3 года назад +12

      "Let me in! This castle is mine!"
      "No!"
      "I'll come in by force, ya daft bastard! I've got an army with horses and ladders and trebuchets and battering rams"
      "I have rocks and buckets of really hot sand that we can drop on you and autumn is coming, your men wanna get home to harvest their crops."
      "God damn it Gary! You're such an asshole! Fine! Keep your bloody pile of rubble. I'm coming back next year, you know!"

    • @matheussanthiago9685
      @matheussanthiago9685 2 года назад +2

      that's monty python and the holy grail summarized

  • @jondorsey2043
    @jondorsey2043 3 года назад +13

    Awww....Aria with that little "metal" yell is everything i needed right now.

  • @eliyahgemstone7505
    @eliyahgemstone7505 4 года назад +41

    Actually the term murder holes refers to a whole different castle feature that is very much separate from machicolations. I watched Shad's videos on castles.

    • @AlechiaTheWitch
      @AlechiaTheWitch 3 года назад

      Would that be like what the chinese used. Like dropin bombs through them

    • @famousdev9707
      @famousdev9707 3 года назад +3

      @@AlechiaTheWitch murder holes were larger holes on the ceiling usually in or in passages between guard gates. attacker would breach a gate and funnel into a cramped passageway, and then encounter another gate. the ceiling would have grates that were removed and boiling oil, fire, poisons etc would be poured in

  • @tchao1995
    @tchao1995 4 года назад +647

    “Dragons dying over the age of 45”
    Those poor babies

    • @salvadortoscano2534
      @salvadortoscano2534 4 года назад +8

      Is that in dragon years, though?

    • @destynova4512
      @destynova4512 4 года назад +5

      So that's why there are no more....

    • @hexados7479
      @hexados7479 4 года назад +20

      @@salvadortoscano2534 dragons mature quick in a lot of lore they can reach full adulthood anywhere from 3-10 years and after that a lot of them are either immortal or can live for centuries to millennium

    • @CorvusCorone68
      @CorvusCorone68 4 года назад +14

      i think there was meant to be a comma between dragons and dying

    • @destynova4512
      @destynova4512 4 года назад +5

      @@CorvusCorone68 well yeah, but this way it is comedic gold.

  • @asdfasdf6606
    @asdfasdf6606 4 года назад +230

    Castles: COME AT ME BRO!
    Attacking Army: Nah lets just surround it and starve them out.

    • @OnixMint
      @OnixMint 4 года назад +3

      Good Crusader or use siege walls :D

    • @FilthyPeasant6
      @FilthyPeasant6 4 года назад +18

      Surrender? Hah! We can hold these walls until we die of old age.

    • @quin2910
      @quin2910 4 года назад +4

      Don't forget launching turds into the walls

    • @mamenggaluh8897
      @mamenggaluh8897 4 года назад

      The Siege of Storm's End?

    • @DrunkGeko
      @DrunkGeko 4 года назад +6

      @@quin2910 more like plague infected corpses

  • @jtb6737
    @jtb6737 3 года назад +11

    One of my favorite is the spiral stairs are designed to allow right handed attackers in the high ground to have advantages over attacking fighters.

  • @Sykdude
    @Sykdude 4 года назад +211

    "I'm not a villain."
    Um, I've seen you on the Command Zone. Don't lie.

  • @Mycernius
    @Mycernius 4 года назад +63

    Fun fact: Caernarfon castle is so well designed for defence that in 1403 only 37 archers successfully defended it against the forces of Owain Glyndŵr.

    • @zuharran
      @zuharran 4 года назад +4

      That is a fun fact!

    • @MonkeyJedi99
      @MonkeyJedi99 4 года назад +4

      @cak01vej QAll I can find is that it was successfully defended by Royalists against three Parliamentarian sieges. I don't have the time or resources to dig deeper than that. I find it impressive nonetheless, as the castle was in a state of unrepair at the time, with only one tower and a gate still having their roofs.

    • @moranjackson7662
      @moranjackson7662 4 года назад +4

      @cak01vej Castles are designed to be defended against a large army, with very few people. If they don't come with siege weapons, like catapults, 37 Archers could easily defend a castle agains hundreds of soldiers.
      Armys in the european middle ages were rather small. 15k Soldiers are rather unlikely ;)

    • @Adjuni
      @Adjuni 4 года назад

      I can't find much info about the siege itself but I found numerous mentions that Owain Glyndŵr "Almost managed to capture it".

    • @natehammar7353
      @natehammar7353 4 года назад +4

      Mycernius Also look into the siege of Corfe Castle during the English Civil War. In 1643, Initially only 5 soldiers defended the castle but the garrison was reinforced to 80. They faced 500 to 600 parliamentarians and were able to hold out for six weeks until releaved. They only lost two casualties compared to over 100 attackers.

  • @benrex7775
    @benrex7775 4 года назад +306

    Shad: Machinations
    Kyle: The murder holes Shad just explained.
    Shad: ...

    • @VoltisArt
      @VoltisArt 3 года назад +28

      col...machicolations. Machinations are plots or schemes which may include machicolations.

    • @infini_ryu9461
      @infini_ryu9461 3 года назад +6

      Machicolations are technically a form of murder hole, being developed out of the murder holes in ceilings, likely from the holes in churches.

    • @BattleSpew
      @BattleSpew 3 года назад +5

      The archer slits that Kyle explained previously are also murder holes. Any engineered gap to allow defenders to assault the attackers with little fear of retribution fall under the category of murder holes.

  • @alekszag1998
    @alekszag1998 2 года назад +4

    The star shaped town at min 2:22 is now called Palmanova (Italy), very sweet place

  • @MazokuJun
    @MazokuJun 4 года назад +71

    And I thought I receive the castle notification from Shadiversity...

    • @davidgumazon
      @davidgumazon 4 года назад

      Now I just realized Anime/Manga/Web Novel their Castles are all trash. EZ to breach.

    • @MazokuJun
      @MazokuJun 4 года назад

      @@davidgumazon context. The Japanese ones shown in Japanese creations are usually accurate and thus in turn hard to breach with their period technology. They usually did less research in Western castles and just took the asthetic instead. Some exceptions exists, like Vinland Saga is pretty period accurate.

  • @noname2250
    @noname2250 4 года назад +229

    normal people: wow look at the walls!
    Shadiversity viewers: Machicolations!!!

    • @hawktitan7896
      @hawktitan7896 4 года назад +5

      Yes

    • @MooShaka89
      @MooShaka89 4 года назад +5

      LOL came here to say this

    • @NinJestre
      @NinJestre 4 года назад +8

      MAAAAACHIIICOOOOLAAAAATIONNNNNNNNNSSSSSS!!!!!!!

    • @101Mant
      @101Mant 4 года назад +2

      My first thought when this popped up in my feed, is he summoning Shad?

    • @nesurame
      @nesurame 4 года назад

      Never knew the real name for murder-holes until now.

  • @biblicallyaccuratecockroach
    @biblicallyaccuratecockroach 4 года назад +89

    4:50 I foresee a *_MACHICOLATIOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS_* coming
    5:08 *_MACHICOLATIOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNSSSSSSSSSSS_*
    Called it XD (also Shad, wooooooo!!!!)

    • @chibikensan
      @chibikensan 4 года назад +3

      i know, my happiest moment lol

  • @kitsunesden8085
    @kitsunesden8085 3 года назад +33

    "I'm not a super villain"
    - Kyle Hill, super villain, 2021

  • @luisg.martinez9124
    @luisg.martinez9124 4 года назад +108

    “Stabby stabby murder murder downwards” needs a t-shirt

  • @Suko120
    @Suko120 4 года назад +92

    "Dragons dying under the age of 45"
    aw, poor dragons :c

    • @gqsmooth1969
      @gqsmooth1969 4 года назад

      What is the average dragon lifespan?

    • @vontw33zy
      @vontw33zy 4 года назад

      I thought dragons were immortal

    • @13KuriMaster
      @13KuriMaster 4 года назад +7

      I thought the "dying under the age of 45" was in reference to us humans, and separate from the dragons part that just happened to be right before it in the list.

    • @clara_corvus
      @clara_corvus 4 года назад +2

      @@gqsmooth1969 Varies, but usually at least a few hundred years. At 45 years, they're basically infants.

    • @sebasfavaron
      @sebasfavaron 4 года назад +2

      @@13KuriMaster ye that was the joke @Space did haha

  • @maxh.365
    @maxh.365 4 года назад +33

    The whole time I was thinking, “They had better collab with shad.” I was gonna be so ticked if it didn’t happen.

  • @NoSh1tSherlock
    @NoSh1tSherlock Год назад +20

    And then, if you made it all the way past everything to get into the castle, you would meet the princess, which is possibly the most deadly death trap inside every castle.

    • @pigeon_commander
      @pigeon_commander Год назад +3

      because she will make u siege another castle
      dont mind my comment from 7 months later

  • @nessmess141
    @nessmess141 4 года назад +16

    I was about to post machicolations in all caps, but then Shad came on. Love this crossover.

  • @dokuujin1851
    @dokuujin1851 4 года назад +88

    I squealed like a schoolgirl when I heard "Incomming transmission from Shad." Oh my. Gold.

  • @Frederic_S
    @Frederic_S 4 года назад +27

    After 4 minuts I was thinking to myself: „If only Shad could make a reactionvideo to this.“ I was not disapointed 🐉🏰

    • @alsaunders7805
      @alsaunders7805 4 года назад

      He knew if he didn't invite him Shad would make a rebuttal video.

  • @Cholm
    @Cholm 3 года назад +23

    I literally was thinking to myself "geez if he keeps talking about castles, he's going to summon Shad.."

  • @LindysEpiphany
    @LindysEpiphany 4 года назад +36

    I love finding new cool channels that educate as well as entertain. New subscriber....thanks Kyle and friends!

    • @kylehill
      @kylehill  4 года назад +5

      Hey I appreciate that Lindy!

    • @dinodoestuff
      @dinodoestuff 3 года назад +2

      @@kylehill thor

  • @coreymetzker2521
    @coreymetzker2521 4 года назад +17

    Shad offered the only information I didn’t already know about castles from playing Stronghold. I just didn’t know I knew it.
    Thank you Kyle!
    And thank you Shad! 😃

  • @seosamhrooney4819
    @seosamhrooney4819 4 года назад +98

    5:09
    Me: *MACHICOLATIONS*
    Neighbour: Hello 911, there's a madman nextdoor screaming

  • @silasstryder
    @silasstryder Год назад +5

    What's neat about the spiral staircase design is you can simulate the effect easily. In Dark Souls there's a black knight atop a spiral stair case, usually you'll end up being forced down the stairs because the top doesn't have much space and you don't want thrown off to your death. However you'll quickly realize any swinging weapon with reach longer than a dagger hits the stairs and beam on the right while the black knight has full freedom to swing. It's actually a pretty common strategy to draw the knight down to the bottom of the tower then enter the tower first so you have the defenders advantage. The knight's swing also gets stopped by walls so it also can't swing at you when you do this. Clearly From Soft understood this cool fact about these stairs when they put this in the level!

  • @dorkseid5874
    @dorkseid5874 4 года назад +70

    As soon as I saw a video about castles, in my head I heard "MACHICOLATIONS!"
    Imagine my satisfaction when Shad showed up.

  • @KamiRecca
    @KamiRecca 4 года назад +17

    As for your very first question: Yes. A lone Tower like a Lighthouse.
    Also, Machicolations and Murder Holes are two different things.
    Machicolations are, as shown, overhanging gaps in the wall so you can shoot down.
    A Murderhole is a hole in the cieling of a room, often the gatehouse and other strategic passages from where you can shoot down or drop things on enemies that have breached the first level of defence (Like the gate or gatehouse).

    • @martinhanke1670
      @martinhanke1670 4 года назад

      Thank you for saying so that I don't. Well explained.

    • @KamiRecca
      @KamiRecca 4 года назад

      @@martinhanke1670 Thank you ^^

    • @MayBeSomething
      @MayBeSomething 4 года назад

      Is it a problem that I read that comment in Shad's voice?

    • @KamiRecca
      @KamiRecca 4 года назад

      @@MayBeSomething not at all ^^

  • @medude420024
    @medude420024 4 года назад +65

    "Not a supervillain"
    Yeah sure, that is exactly what a supervillain would say

  • @mekhakreature
    @mekhakreature 2 года назад +18

    This is actually _why_ I love casltes. I love the idea of living in a location that is intelligently designed and constructed to murder intruders!

  • @metakillz3532
    @metakillz3532 4 года назад +27

    The SECOND that I saw shad I knew the machiculations were coming 😂

  • @kepler9014
    @kepler9014 4 года назад +128

    **Trebuchet would like to know your location.**

    • @marcosbarrionuevo7792
      @marcosbarrionuevo7792 4 года назад +10

      *r/trebuchetmemes wants to know your location*

    • @bepbep7418
      @bepbep7418 4 года назад +4

      Tunneling worked way better

    • @drew8347
      @drew8347 4 года назад +3

      Trebuchet, a wonderful mechanism, asks too many personal questions though

    • @gabrielandradeferraz386
      @gabrielandradeferraz386 4 года назад +2

      *Angry AOE trebuchet noises*

    • @ailius1520
      @ailius1520 4 года назад +2

      Yeah, about that...in real life there isn't a game balance rule prohibiting trebuchets from being mounted on the castle itself. Or cannons. Or giant cannons that didn't even need to be moved.

  • @rajashekharba6223
    @rajashekharba6223 4 года назад +27

    The collab I didn't know I needed 😭

  • @axlefoxe
    @axlefoxe 3 года назад +2

    Was actually a shad fan first (history nerd speaking) then started watching this channel, watching the video thinking about shad talking about machiculations when you were getting up there then lost my mind happy when he showed up, PERFECT execution

  • @AkahigeNoAmo
    @AkahigeNoAmo 4 года назад +46

    "stabby stabby murder murder" I am gonna rip and use that in the future, when time and occasion demand me to - this is just too good

    • @mhoppy6639
      @mhoppy6639 3 года назад

      I agree, it’s fantastic. Reminiscent of the description I saw once of some of the violence in a Tom & Jerry cartoon - basically, “twist, push, stab, lacerate. The end”. Put like that it’s even funnie-I’ll get my coat.

  • @Obbsnja
    @Obbsnja 4 года назад +56

    someone's gonna say is soo...
    ( *Deep Breath* )
    MACHICOLATIONS!!!!

  • @nag7254
    @nag7254 4 года назад +753

    "Castles are engineered to kill you."
    Wow, don't say, it's almost like they were made to help you defend against attackers

    • @Rubix1982
      @Rubix1982 4 года назад +12

      A solid defensive position. Duh.

    • @SirTomFoolery
      @SirTomFoolery 4 года назад +64

      The best defense is a good defense

    • @kabob0077
      @kabob0077 3 года назад +12

      @@SirTomFoolery Unless the Castle Builder chose a poor spot for said Castle, then it's a good defensive position in a bad spot.

    • @JenkoRun
      @JenkoRun 3 года назад +2

      I'm your 200th like. Pay me.

    • @cesarpedrazamartinezgarcia725
      @cesarpedrazamartinezgarcia725 3 года назад +3

      I was expecting a explanation of how dangerous they were to the owners themselves

  • @connorhulkowitz2038
    @connorhulkowitz2038 3 года назад +43

    “Remember being outside and around stuff” hearing that I laughed because it was funny. Then I realized how messed up it is to laugh at being in a pandemic. What a wild life I get to enjoy 😅

  • @craigmassey2973
    @craigmassey2973 4 года назад +58

    Killing field???
    Don't be put off by the name Timmy, it's not really a field...

  • @jacewhite8540
    @jacewhite8540 4 года назад +5

    I knew about the clockwise stair case thing from the Book Series The Rangers Apprentice. I was just waiting and waiting and waiting, and then finally rewarded at the end.
    Thank you I needed that.

  • @edi9892
    @edi9892 4 года назад +62

    I'd like to point out some prevalent misconceptions though:
    1) even in late medieval Europe, *most castles* (and obviously buildings in general) *were made of wood* (probably 90%). Even today, German has the adjective steinreich (literally rich as stone, or rich in stone) to refer to someone as very rich. It can be assumed that most wooden structures that were built to last were plastered, or had other precautions against rot. The plastering had the advantage that it would look like a stone structure (which were plastered just the same back in the day and often in shiny white).
    2) *Most castles were very small,* smaller than the castle stereotype in your head! This goes especially for stone castles, as building in stone was expensive. In fact, many castles had only a stone keep (often not significantly bigger than a watch-tower of the Roman era), and the rest was made of wood. The next step up would be a main-building with adjacent keep made of stone. Then, it would be the gate, the outer wall, and one or two additional towers. That's it! The main tower was usually only accessible from the first floor, which made the ground floor the vault. This could house valuables, weapons, or prisoners (as it is usually only accessible through a ladder or crank-powered elevator and thus safer than iron bars with a state of the art lock, plus the floor above is likely occupied 24/7 unlike any other room in the castle)
    3) most people *underestimate the required logistics of maintaining a castle* operational. Let's assume your ideal castle with a keep, a gate, 4 towers and some additional buildings. How many defenders would it need outside combat?
    Since the keep has its field of view restricted by the outer structures, it would be essential to man the outer towers and even then it would be very advisable to have people patrol the wall and the roof of the keep. Then, it probably takes at least two men to close a gate and lock it with a beam and while they do it, it would be highly advised that there would be spearmen and archers giving cover.
    So, let's say the skeletal force would be:
    8 archers for the towers, the gate, and the patrols on the wall and keep.
    2 soldiers for the gate (both outer gate and keep!) and another 2 for standby
    This makes 12 in total and that wouldn't be impressive at all in a siege... Moreover, you'd need 3-4x as many if you take shifts into account. To complicate things further, the noble family living there might have 20 members, but only 6 active knights (maybe, 2 too old for service and the rest are either female or children). The other guards will be likely men at arms (expensive), or commoners forced into guard duty. The latter would be pretty much untrained (they probably still have to work on the fields or workshops!), poorly equipped, and would probably open the gates if the invading army has their relatives as hostages... Long story short, you need at minimum 30 soldiers and for each, there would be 2-5 civilians that are either family or provide for them. Thus, your small castle would have to be able to accommodate up to 100-200 people in a siege and you need food and water for all of them, and then it's still ideal conditions for cabin-fever... Then think of how much firewood you'd need, how much smoke there would be, and how much waste there would be needed to be disposed of and that for a castle smaller than a modern block!
    Plus, you probably need to repaint every building once a year and reapply plaster and roofing every 10 years. Wooden structures would need replacement once every generation (20-50 years). The vegetation around the castle needs to be cut down once a year to prevent enemies from sneaking up, or fires damaging the castle.
    4) Just like today, the best door is useless when the enemy can enter through a window, the defensive strength of a castle had to justify it's construction and upkeep costs. It makes for instance little sense to make an outpost a stone castle if you have little hope in defending it. If your castle is on an island, or up a mountain, thick walls only take space, and wooden structures or thinner brick walls may be enough. Also, even wooden palisades, but also brick walls can sandwich a layer of dirt and gravel, which greatly increases its defensive strength. This was even valid up to the age of the starforts and e.g. Hohenzollern castle is a chateau within a fort. Thus, it has mostly thin walls and relies on its terrain as a defense. The starfort-like outer wall makes it however very defensible. Also, you can create many layers of defenses with thin walls for the same costs as for one thick stone wall. The question then becomes, if you can muster the manpower to defend a castle based on depth-defense?
    EDIT: I need to mention Shadiversity and his great video on wooden castles and his nice collaboration with Metatron.

    • @Ertwin123
      @Ertwin123 4 года назад

      Also, castles pretty much became obsolete with the invention of gunpowder.

    • @edi9892
      @edi9892 4 года назад +9

      @@Ertwin123 not really. Cannons were far rarer than handguns and it took quite a while that for castles to become obsolete. Castles high up on mountains, or on lakes were relatively safe from early cannons and wooden fortresses and starforts were used until APHE were invented.

    • @leonpeters-malone3054
      @leonpeters-malone3054 4 года назад +4

      @@Ertwin123 Hardly. The original cannon came out fairly early on, 1400's odd in Europe. They were made with iron bands and had a removable breach.
      Sure, they weren't exactly the 32 pounders of later periods, they still went boom pretty good and could send some pretty scary shot down range.

    • @leonpeters-malone3054
      @leonpeters-malone3054 4 года назад +5

      Sir, I must challenge some of your numbers and assertions here.
      I find that the castle was a pretty solid force multiplier. It helped give even a small number of defenders a pretty solid force multiplier. They could hold out for quite some time and while the traditional small keep could be little more than a tower, a few out buildings and a wall, manned properly, was quite the thorn to be overcome by an opposing army. That's not to say you had to have hundreds, a garrison of even as little as thirty could be quite hard to remove.
      I will concede that the reason for night attacks and the like was most likely as much to stress the limited number of defenders as it was to try and actually just plain, breach and enter the castle.
      I also seem to remember, think, that the cabin fever nature was used and plague was used as a weapon in the 1200's, 1300's to try and end the siege. Make the people so sick they could no longer fight.
      I'm thinking for the longest time, forts on a whole were wooden and that's going back to the Romans and Greeks. Permanent military structures like castles and later forts were very much about stamping area dominance. See Wales, on some level. So I'm going to have to check a few books here. Make sure I'm not confusing things.
      Castle logistics are a funny thing, in that you can keep a lot of the necessary war, conflict resources about, the food and water on the other hand. That made it harder to really argue on, about, for. You could have a lot of preserved foodstuffs ready, salted meats etc. That doesn't mean you can make it fresh and then it often became a waiting game, who had the better supplies, who could sit there for the longer term on the supplies they brought with them. I'd wager hunger and thirst decided more sieges that weapons.

    • @dans4323
      @dans4323 4 года назад +2

      Wow, very interesting comment.
      I've never been to Burg Hohenzollern but I put it on my to-go list now. I wonder though which way it's geographic location was primarily meant to defend from, seeing that it is facing the Albtrauf in the south. Geographically it would make sense to defend from attacks from the north but then again its closest villages are in the north, the very people it should seem to defend.? Maybe it served as a place to draw back to, as a last resort? I definitely need to read up on it as it seems there were a few other castles, too directly north of the Albtrauf (Teck, Hohenneuffen).

  • @pouncepounce7417
    @pouncepounce7417 2 года назад +1

    sudden blunt trauma death spiced with some piercing damage is always whimsical, contrary to the shockwave concussion force trauma of modern times