Videokin: AITA for allowing my friend to propose at my graduation party?
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- Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
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I don't...understand? The subject of the party was willing to share her moment with a close family friend, so it was a sweet gesture, and I don't think this friend proposing would really take away from anything. The proposal probably took 5-10 minutes, and then the congratulations afterwards probably took 5-10 minutes. The couple would have taken attention away from OP's graduation for maybe 30 minutes, max, before the party settles back down again.
I think the real issue was that the mother felt left out, and that does make some sense. This is a family friend, so I'm presuming the mom is also at least somewhat close to them, so maybe she more so felt sad that she had no involvement in that part of it. So maybe it was a bit careless of them to not include her and ask her if it's okay as well, but idk, I just don't see it as a big deal.
Oh, but I also think mom is a bit of an AH for making it about herself and her discomfort right away. Even if she felt like it wasn't fair for whatever reason, and if her reasoning in the moment is that it's taking away from OP's graduation, then getting upset in that way during the party is also taking away from the graduation by adding unnecessary negativity and drama to an otherwise special occasion. She could have waited until a day or two later to bring up any frustrations at least.
The mother is trying to show off her daughter, feel proud, and get clout. The daughter is trying to enjoy her time with her friends. It shows that the mother did this for herself, not her daughter. The proposal didn't steal the daughter's thunder, it stole the mother's.
But, if your biggest bragging right is that your daughter graduated high school, that's REALLY pathetic.
Bottom line, the friend asked, got permission, no harm done. This wasn't a wedding, it was a party for the sake of having a party.
Things that don’t goto plan infuriate me even if it’s absolutely not a problem. I feel for mom but yeah her and i are wrong probably often. It’s an us problem.
@@NuclearWinter69 I get you. I'm autistic af so something big happening out of the blue can eff with me as well, like an information overload type of thing. That's why I'm not 100% against the mom or anything, it's just a shame she reacted in the way that she did.
Seems like the party was more for the mom than the daughter.
The good old 'parent who lives vicariously through their child' scenario.
this. the mom is the asshole, the dude even ASKED beforehand, 100% agree with pip here
@@MasahikoKohineko Sometimes parents want to celebrate something their kid did way more than the kid. To them it holds much more importance and feel like their kid is the one that deserves all of it.
True
pippa the party was for the moms clout not the daughter
oof
Mother is selfish. The party is for herself and her friend. The invitee, including her daughter, are there to praise the mom and friend for being nice/great/whatever. I 100% agree with Pippa's take. That Bacon person seems like a hater. The other mom seems just as selfish.
Weird for the mother to get upset over that; it just makes the party more memorable for everyone involved.
Not weird. The daughter did not consult mom prior. Mom was trying to look out for her daughter because she thought someone was trying to steal her daugthers thunder. The daughter should have given the mom a heads up. Good mom, bad daugther.
The mother is overreacting to a otherwise wholesome moment for them both
Mom is clearly blowing things out of proportion.
now she wants us to have excuses to be late
I think she mad hope she's happy
A youtube video is just a stream that all the viewers are late for.
That was it? Mom’s name is clearly Karen.
IMO it's a nothingburger and no they're not the AH, guy just saw a chance and asked, if they had said no they would have done it at another moment anyway, and people make a big deal over milestones and events as it is, just enjoy the moment and don't overthink it IMO.
The mom making a scene ruined the party more than anything
Graduation is always about the parents lol
The guy asked beforehand, so OP knew about it and gave the go ahead. It's not like he just sprang it out of nowhere. It just seems to be the mom that wasn't cool with the plan. Maybe, as that one comment said, they could have tipped her off; if she wouldn't be a blabbermouth about it.
Nice channel guidelines 👌
To play a bit of devils advocate I could sort of understand the mother having this reaction if this is a reoccurring theme with max where he will take advantage of OPs generosity whenever possible, but if this is a one time thing its definitely an overreaction on the moms part.
Love when this pink yabbit speaks words directly at me. Very cool
So there are ways to be an asshole in the scenario:
-If friend didn't ask for permission
-Asking for permission if you know the person is easily pressurable
-If it was before or near after any announcements made during the party
-If mom made a big deal in front of people, or got audibly loud
Sounds like none of these happened
Overall I do think daughter isn't in the wrong, I can see why the mom can get upset because it's supposed to be for daughter, and then the guy just figured it'd be decent if everyone there knew them.
(assumed cause people were 'overjoyed,' but I don't know anyone who doesn't clap or smile at a proposal)
I think only missed step is informing the mom, moms are kinda like that, you can't leave them out of a plan.
I will say I don't think Pippa is right that people don't splurge a bit for engagement. It's not super casual.
But I do think that top comment is schizo.
I agree with Pippa's take.
Well I disagree with Pippa's take! She should only be giving.
These people are maniacs. This is a bonus on top of the event. There is nothing bad about it.
The occasional Pippa video. I say he isn't, it was supposed to be his day, his celebration and his mom thought so as well, but if he gave the go ahead I don't see what was wrong in the end. If this was directed at the mom now then I'd say yes, she is the a-hole
How dare Matt want to make a special memory at an event with lots of friends and family.
That wasn't planned for him, nor paid for by him, nor a get together for him. It was all done by someone else, for someone else.
Yay, return of flop-eared Pippa! Also, fun to see a video!
Pipkin Pippa, the most creative content creator, has created a new type of content: Asynchronous streams.
In any case, OP is based and marriagepilled. Did mom plan the party for OP, or for herself? Sounds like she only did it for herself. If you plan the party FOR your daughter, and she wants to let them propose, then that's her choice, not yours.
landlord of happiness lmaoooo
I'd say:
1) Mom was very much over-reacting.
2) I would've asked him to make sure he knew of her answer beforehand to ensure there would be no proposal-rejection drama at the party.
best example of why it might have not been cool.
It seems so arbitrary to blame the guy who gave the go-ahead, the mom could have just as easily blamed the proposer for pressuring the guy to say yes. That's how you know this is all very silly.
yeddit yabbit
If they had proposed without her permission it would of been shitty, but they had her permission at the event celebrating her, and she doesn't feel it stole her spotlight but enriched the event, so it's fantastic.
Mom's being shitty.
Pipvideo we are blessed
I think it would've been better if the mother was informed beforehand, but aside from that this was turned into a bigger deal than it needed too. The guy asked for permission, he didn't steal the limelight.
The mom is being a jerk because the party was more for her than anyone else.
Classic "I provided everything from young" moment from parents trying to guilt trip their kids
If my mom did that I would nearly freaking disown her, thankfully she is not like that.
She lied she aint streaming
*asynchronous stream
That first reply is peak reddit energy ngl
I can somewhat understand the mom being upset. The mom clearly had to put money and time into this to plan this for their child as they viewed this as a huge moment for them. Renting out a venue isn't cheap, depending on the size of the party and if she had to assist with getting people there travel expenses aren't cheap and time consuming as well to line up people's schedules, especially also adding things like catering and such.
It would have been respectful to ask the mom since she was the one planning this as she was putting in the effort into this. I understand that it's the child's party, but as the mom said she didn't put in anything into really putting the party together to make that call. And in the future if they don't work out or the relationship has issues, that moment that was meant for the child's graduation is now tied to it forever.
Usually for proposals it is an event that is planned by the person proposing to figure out. Whether you want friends and family there, be at a special place, have a photographer on standby etc is all up to the person proposing and by asking at that venue that seemed to already have the heavier costing things, it did come off as leaning onto the mom's investment for the graduation to circumvent any additional cost or planning on the proposer's part.
I see a lot of people dogging the mom on this, but if you ever plan a huge event, a lot of yourself does go into the event, and seeing the main purpose of the event get kind of hijacked wouldn't feel good. Thankfully it was somewhat hijacked by a wholesome moment, but if this was a negative experience like if the cousin said no, or it broke out into a fight, the entire night would be ruined.
Mom: How dare you do what you want at MY your graduation party!
If anything I think the Mom should’ve made the AITA post lmaooo
Mom and her friend are living vicariously through the daughter OP. Who sets up a 'dorm room registry'? It's college; your dorm room isn't going to be big, you're likely sharing it with another person, and even if you get lucky and get aparment suite-style as a freshman, why spend good money on things that will likely get trashed? Maybe I'm digitally old as dirt, since college was almost two and a half decades ago, but that is wild parent behavior.
"Landlord of happiness" could be a name of a song
ahh yes the most important milestone in life, your hs graduation party
That top comment must have been the mom.
just enjoy the moment lmao, let bro have his and nothings stopping you from having yours
I could understand the mother's argument if it actually was a proposal at a wedding, but a party for simply graduating high school? Come on now 😂.
Usually graduation parties are filled with family and close friends. I don't see much of an issue including the proposal.
I see the perspective of the mom though about "stealing her daughters thunder" though due to how I was raised which was by more strict/respectful guidelines as a semi sheltered millennial.
_"Nay,_
_you cannot do this, Bane!_
_For I am the lord of this plane!"_
One hundred percent right Pipps
I suppose one concern might be: what if she said no? That would completely kill the mood. Now, a lot of couples go ring shopping together and everything, so if you know she'll say yes that's one thing. But if you don't KNOW her answer, maybe you shouldn't propose at a party (or in front of others honestly). That's something to keep in mind when deciding when to propose.
i'ts my party and i'll dance if I want to
i really dispise when people put on a party for someone but its never really for that person. my mother in law does this all the time. also i dont really care for parties anyway so anything to get the attention off me is welcome
It's my party, and I'll be wholesome if I want to.
live right now you say
Can never trust leddit to have a good take on anything, apparently
I agree this is stupid it was a graduation party that is so petty😂
I was engaged! This is engagement. Honest.
Went to a bunch of these around graduation time in high school. They were fun! Not exactly huge events, more like an excuse for a party where a bunch of us who knew each other could hang out.
No marriage proposals though. Would have been strange, though I'm pretty sure almost nobody would have been upset by something like that happening. Outside of the people agreeing to get married, it just isn't/shouldn't be that big of a deal to anybody. If anything, maybe a little odd that someone would want to do a proposal at one of these, but not a problem?
The mom definitely wrote this. It's too professional for an 18yo in current year.
Shouldn't told the girl it was her party. I can understand how the mom would feel robbed since she certainly made a lot of sacrifices to even get her daughter to that stage. If she was honest from the beginning about that she'd have more right to be mad. Could also be a lesson about propriety.
Pipipipipipipipipi
why do people make a big deal out of trivial BS?
nobody would look back fondly about a graduation party if they ever reminisce about it at all
The Mom needs to back off. It's not about her, even though she thinks it is.
"What he really wanted was the engagement to be subsidized by your mother. What was the rush? they are 21 and 22?"
And there it is, you can clearly see where the bias came from lmao
so many jealous of young and wedding...
Not gonna lie, I just like listening to Pippa yap about whatever.
I swear that the covid made her voice deeper
Personally I believe that engagements should be kept private and away from other people since it's more personal. There's no social pressure to say "yes"(though most girls like the attention) or spur of the moment expectations(never take your girl to a wedding). Doing it at someone else's event, is bad form regardless, a dick move if it's not at the end. But like she said, it was a gift and he decided to use it to give his friend a platform, pretty much out of her hands at that point. The mother could either be making it about herself(it's a memory that she wants to have of him) or feel as if her son is being walked over and it's personal(which in a way is still about her).
Some people just can't live without the vitriol. The mom's a Karen.
Graduation party > Wedding
I mean since woman aren't getting marriage proposals anymore they have to keep inventing new parties to fill the hole 🎉 🕳️
That's what I was thinking. A graduation party isn't a wedding, not even close. Graduating from high school is a trivial accomplishment for 90% of people. Someone proposing at it isn't "stealing her thunder". In fact, if she had any high school friends at the party in the same grade, it's basically their graduation party too. The mother is just being overly controlling and making the whole thing about herself.
@@TheGreenKnight500 The mother is simply living through her daughter. Many such cases
@@ThatReviewerGamer Exactly. Plus, I think the mother is trying to show off. It's basically a big act to brag that her daughter graduated hight school, which is really pathetic. Might as well throw a party to brag that your child is toilet trained or learned to read.
A party of this kind should really be a way for people to spend time with each other before they all go their separate ways. People often lose contact after graduation. Some of them will go to college in a different part of the country and won't see each other for a long time, if ever again. Making it all about one specific person graduating is just fart huffing.
Idk, I don’t see an issue. She didn’t have to do anything different. They didn’t invite any new people. Celebrations are for the enjoyment of those that have achieved not the hosts so it is their choice when they don’t demand extra resources as is the case here. It’s not about the Mom that’s the truth.
I left my brother’s wedding to go make out with the bride’s best friend. I then went on to marry said best friend, and she and I have been together 20 years since. Happily ever after… but I was supposed to help with the cleanup, am I the A hole?
How dare you hijack my taco bar!
That mom has issues
OP would have just told her Mom about it beforehand, and there wouldn't have been any issues.
NTA. It's a party for him at the end of the day, so he should have a huge say in what happens, because it is a gift
Surprised how many people in the comments on the Reddit post were mainly toxic bs. Like granted yeah I will agree that maybe OP maybe should’ve let her mom know or talk to her mom about it, especially since yeah they r the ones putting it together. But it is a graduation party for OP. It’s like a birthday you’d have as a kid, you’re celebrating a day all for u and celebrating with family and friends. The way the mom reacted just has one of those weird scenarios where it’s like their child is getting married but the mom doesn’t see it as their child’s day it’s the mom’s. Like “It is “MY” day and nobody is gonna ruin “MY” day!”
My graduation party was a pizza...
Bro, you had it good. Mine was "Right, you're a man now. Piss off"
Reddit always has the wrong opinion
These AITA stories are always so completely different from what the title implies
I am so confused.
Nah I'm with the mother. The party was intended for her daughter. The least the daughter could do was ask for permission. Also max could've just proposed anywhere else. If he wanted a little gathering of family and friends the dude could've saved up and throw it himself.
O damn I got here at the perfect time
You're not LIVE?
Never ask Reddit anything
I hope you make more Videokins in the future, Pippa! More digestable content that isn't from Low Effort Clips!
Good to see reddit comments are as unhinged as ever
I’m going to send this video to people and call it “Pippa’s Graduation Video”. I’m sure nobody will have a heart attack.
I miss these....
The mom planned it but it was never her party so this is clearly NTA
Graduation party isn't that big of a deal and he was Ok with it. Now if it was a Wedding that would certainly be a no go.
Been a long time since I've seen a Pippa video but she seems way less squeaky today
I mean, it's her cousin, so I don't get why the mom would be upset about it, and the girl even said it was okay
Marry me, Pippa.
Yes you are.
Things that don’t goto plan infuriate me even if it’s absolutely not a problem. I feel for mom but yeah her and i are wrong probably often.
Nothingkin Burgerpa, the mother is the only one mad (and also Redditors apparently)
The mom sounds like a shoujo antagonist flipping out because somebody else got the spotlight for 5 seconds when it was her daughters big event. If it was supposed to be a family thing why were friends even invited?
At best I can say an event organizer doesn't like surprise additions to the schedule. But this isn't xbox's e3 show, this is a small shindig celebrating girl's graduation and there is no excuse for mom to be that much of a control freak.
OP is innocent. It would be weird and lowkey AH to say no to someone you are close to. However, proposing at somebody else’s party is kinda weird. The onus of any guilt is on the one who proposed. All in all, not a big deal.
If I was OP, would have told my mom she is ruining my grad party by complaining, and making me sad and upset.
I've been listening to too much will of councel. I was expecting a buff man to start yelling at the top commenter and saying he would shove him in a locker
Pipipipipipi💚
whoah she gone
Hahahahaha what kind of psychopath throws a party for a proposal? The engagment party comes after they say yes... There is nothing to subsidise... That top comment has genuinely annoyed me to an unreasonable degree. 🤣🤣🤣
Edit: Typo
For graduation parties, there's a lot of folks that could be friends that might be going out of state to continue education or to work, so that could be like the last "formal" party they'd get to see everyone together for a long time, if at all anymore. I know it's harder for me to see my friends I grew up with anymore these days.
In agreeance it would have been better that the friend proposing just asked first, though. Feels more of a courtesy move than anything else. Rude at best.
But he did ask.
@@TheHolySemiColon oh, damn, he did. I'm dumb as hell. I blanked on the start and focused on a part of the discussion towards the end. Whoops