A Jew, a Hindu and a Politician Went Hiking in Tennessee | Joke
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- Uploaded by Teacher Ami
Copyright to Rabbi YY Jacobson
Rabbi YY Jacobson: How to Get Over Grudges and Resentment
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#TeacherAmi #AmizurNachshoni #YYJacobson #Joke #Jew #Jewish #Hindu #Politician #Hiking #Tennessee #muslim
An Irishman walks past a bar.
that's the joke.
Or a sure sign of the end of the world coming very soon.
He was walking to a different bar.
@@darmam0o ---- That's no excuse for not stopping at the first one. Looks like the world is coming to an end.
A well tanned Irishman exists - that's the joke 🤣🤣🤣
I’m Irish and I don’t even drink 😂😂
An Imam, a Priest, and a rabbit walk into a blood donor drive. They are asked what their blood types are. The Imam says- "I'm pretty sure I'm a type A." The Priest says- "I'm pretty sure I'm a type B." The rabbit says- "I'm pretty sure I'm a typo."
🤣🤣🤣
oh, that was good.
Laugh out loud funny--great way to start the day! Thanks!
It took me a few seconds. 😂
Very clever.
A Jew, a Baptist, a Hindu, and a Politician walk into a bar. The bartender says "Is this a joke?"
It, in fact, is a joke.
😂😂😂😂
The Monty Python crew were filming in Germany and on a day off the tour guide decided to take them to Dachau (true story). When they got there, the security wouldn't let them in. Quick as a flash Graham Chapman said: "Tell them we're Jewish,"
😮
I don't get it??
That was a tough crowd.
I guess the audience was composed of cows and pigs.
the crowd was not mic'd
it's an old joke tho
@@muse3324 Moses was the first to tell it.
room full of politicians...
Good to know that cows and pigs have sense and standards!
It's like the drunk lying down in the gutter with the dog and the dog gets up and leaves.
Pull the udder one.
Some politicians are good like obama
@@raymondclark1785not like that at all
Joke doesn’t make sense, a Hindu would happily stay there, most keep cows in their farmyard and they are treated as beloved pets
I didn't see the punchline coming. Well delivered.
Agreed.
I saw it, politicians are filthy liars who get rich off the taxpayer
The punchline was obvious, but still very funny because it's true.
There's no punchline Murray. It's not a joke.
It deserved a better response from the audience.
I fully agree!
They didn't get it initially!
They were mostly politicians (maybe 🤷)
It would bring the house down today.
The problem with the joke is that you can see the punchline coming long before it arrives.
A Jew, a Hindu, two Jehovahs Witnesses, and a Baptist walk into an Irish Bar for a Christmas Party…..no joke. Our workplace Christmas Party.
What do you give them for secrete Santa.
Three French men walk into a bar.
You'd think the third one would have seen the other two faceplant the wall, but he didn't.
DEI at its best
i mean Christmas is the most beautiful thing in the entire universe
The JWs would not have shown because they would face risked shunning for showing up at a Christmas party. Didn’t happen.
I read that researchers have been moving from rats to lawyers for using in research. There are three reasons why. 1. There are more lawyers than rats. 2. The researchers get less attached to the lawyers. 3. There are some things that rats just won't do.
Trumps lawyers ha ha
When I heard that joke decades ago, it was in reference to AIDS research. The punch line hinted at what lawyers might be willing to do.
Excellent 👍👍👍
@@aprilgoffinet3159instead of lawyers it should be politicians especially Demmunist politicians
@@rucksackransack demmunists? What about the Republikkklans?
I've known it for years, animals are a LOT smarter than we give them credit for! 🐄🐖
they are too smart to end a sentence with a preposition.
LMAOOO
@@googoo-gjoob Welcome to decriptivism.
@googoo That is the sort of pedantry up with which I will not put.
@@googoo-gjoob What are you getting at?
I hadn't heard that joke since I was in the Navy over a half century ago. Now it's new again, and I can tell it to folks who haven't heard it.
They knew what a Hindu was in Navy half a century ago?
A knight comes home from the Crusades. His horse can go no further, and it is a terrible rainy evening. He knocks at the gate of a manor house, begging for a fresh horse. The Lady of the Manor apologizes and explains she has no spare horses. ‘However’ she says there is #Wowzer, our beloved St. Bernard. You can have him if he will help?!
‘ My lady ‘moans Sir Ethelred- surely you wouldn’t send a knight out on a dog like this??’
@@aclark903 Frank Fontaine (a.k.a. Crazy Guggenheim) told that joke on the Jackie Gleason Show in 1967. Thanks for refreshing my memory.
@@AmericanActionReport In England I think #RobbieCorbett stole it around 1970 something.
Jewish mother concerned about son’s
future, consults w/ rabbi. He tells her to
Set a Torah, Money, Wine on a table.
If he select the Torah, he will be a rabbi.
If Money, a Banker /Wine, a connoisseur.
Son comes in, picks the Torah, puts the
Money in his pocket, pours a glass of
Wine. Sits down, Mother says, ‘OYE’
HE IS GOING TO BE A PRIEST ✅
Rimshot
Daaaaaaam!
😂
Woah, 😂 that’s funny
👏🤣
In front of the vatican an catholic priest watches two beggers. Both of them have a holy symbol in front of them. One was the star of David the other was a cross. The priest saw hat no one gave money to the man with the star of David so he walked over to him and adressed the him: "My son, don't you know where you are? This is the Vatican, the heart of christianity. With your symbol the people won't give you any money, they will give all there money to your competitor with the cross here, just out of spite."
After he said that the begger turned to the other begger and said: "Hey, Moshe. Look who wants to teach the Goldstein brothers about marketing."
i laughed :) good one :)
🤣
There was these 3 people's in a boat, a doctor, an engineer and a lawyer. The boat sank in a shark infected ocean and the doctor and engineer ended up being swallowed by the shark, when they turned towards the lawyer, none of the sharks advanced further since there was a bigger shark in the ocean.
Professional courtesy...
And oldie, but a goodie.
an oldie an staly
Politics is no longer wolves and a sheep voting on what's for lunch.
Politics has become the sheep voting for which wolf gets the first bite!
😢
Well said.
That was pretty good.
A rabbi, a priest, and a minister all walk into a bar and all go to the bar and sit on stools. The bartender comes over and says,
"What is this? Some kind of a joke?"
I shouldn't but here I go:
A rabbi, a priest, and lawyer are crossing a river on a ferry, with many passengers on board. The ferry struck something and began to sink. The compassionate rabbi shouts, "Save the children!" They selfish lawyer shouts, "Screw the children!" The priest says, "What? Right now?"
Thanks for sharing. That is hilarious.
yikes...hahaha....true though
I didn't get the first one.
@@jishasen7328 Because so many jokes start with, "A rabbi, a priest, and a minister all walk into a bar."
@@zitternden Thanks.
"It's very hard to get a Jew to go hiking." Aw, come on, why wouldn't a Jew want to wander through the wilderness for a while...oh.
👊😆😂🤣
Why?
@@jishasen7328 Bible, Old Testament, Exodus, look it up
Now that's funny, cuz there's a lot of truth to it!!!
😂 I agree with the cow and the pig! 🤣
Abe goes to see his friend Morris. "Morris, I have a problem - my son has become a Christian."
Morris replies, "Funny thing you mention that, for my son has also become a Christian. Let's go talk to the Rabbi." They see the Rabbi, and tell him their dilemma. The Rabbi says, "Funny thing you mention that, because my son also became a Christian. I'll pray about it. Oh God, we all have the same problem. All our sons have become Christians. What do we do?" And out of the Heavens comes a booming voice, "Funny thing you mention that ...." (My Dad told me this joke when I became a Christian. Please, it can be a funny story.)
😁😆😂🤣🤪
😂😂😂😂😂😂🎉
👍🏼
A man walks into a bar.
"Ouch."
A bar walks into a man -
This joke was brought to you by vlad the impaler ...
It's not a joke. It's the truth about politicians being universally hated so much that even Cows and Pigs won't stay in the same room with them. 😂😂😂😂😂
No one can sleep with a politician - lies from head to toe!!
Jews have a great sense of humour.
@baronvonnemblessome Jews do some stuff, some of us do other stuff
Jewish humor is intelligent, often a bit self-deprecating or dark, but never mean.
Jews do have a great sense of humor.
At the same time, they have the know/sense that they can be only laughed at in jokes, not in real life.
Guess thats the reason they don't mind being the butt of jokes.
- my observations as a Hindu :)
I’ve heard this joke before but instead of a politician, it was a televangelist. And Joel Olsteen told it!
I didn't know he had so much self awareness
@@Jabberwockybird That’s what I thought too!
Screw Joel Osteen.
I was at a multi faith wedding. Afterwards the Rabbi and the Priest were at the bar. They were joined by my date’s son. His last name…..Pastor 🤣
Did the rabbi and priest have a drink together? You missed the biggest detail.
@@PolishBehemoth of course. They were at the bar.
@@lindab.716 What sectors were the Jew and Christian?
Tough room. That was a great joke.
People have heard this before. It's been around for a while.
May be crowd was full of politicians
The longer the joke, the more spectacular the punchline should be. The audience got short changed here.
@@ecaepevolhturttrue
A Jew,Christian and Muslim go in a bar the Jew gets to the bar first and says I will get the first round because they were there first !
That was not bad 😂
Here is a follow up :
The christian orders red wine . And then the jew asks him to pay the bill .
The christian says why? and the jew answers: it is the least you could do after drinking the blood of a jewish man right in front of me !
The muslim was just there to use the bathroom ...
Very funny, thank you!
Last time a group of Hebrews went hiking, what should have taken a couple of years took somewhat longer.🤭🇮🇱🙏🇮🇱
Lol i actually heard a similar joke once:
A jew, a lawyer, and a politician goes to a bar. Yes, "goes", its a one guy 😂
Maybe the joke should be
A jew, a lawyer, and a politician go to the bar.
The bartender says “what can I get you, sir?”
As we face an election today in the UK such a joke is most apt 😂
The Jew and the Hindu wouldn’t associate with many of our politicians.
Great punch line- didn’t see it coming - tough audience, must have all been politians!
Hindu was a man and the Jew was a woman. They slept together and after 9 months gave birth to a Hinjew.
Wth 😂
Lmao🤣
Keep yer day job...
Very unnecessary comment.
So was it a girl or a goy? :)
I like the one about the Jew who's concerned his son became a Christian after he left home, so he consults a rabbi, who confides that the same thing happened to his son, so they consult God, who replies, "Have you heard what happened to my Son after he left heaven?"
A rabbit?
The rabbit was only in the joke because of autocorrect.
@@Saruman38 I guess my AutoCorrect is harebrained.
This is one of those "one size fits all" jokes. You can substitute the characters according to who you want to burn.
lmao well said
People have no frickin’ sense of humor. I find it hilarious that he’s even telling this joke! 🤣😂😅😂😂😂😂
And thereafter, no stand-up comedian ever visited this cemetry.
There's actually no prohibition for a Hindu to sleep near a cow. Its pretty common in rural areas to have a cow or other animals like dogs or goats in your frontyard while you sleep on a charpai (bed) outside. I think a Hindu would take more offence if made to sleep near a pig, same as a Jew or Muslim. Although pigs are not specifically called unclean in Hindu scriptures but culturally, in India, pigs are viewed as very dirty animals by almost all religious communities.
Oh thats old. In uk its told with an english guy a scots guy and an irish guy. Shakespeare was telling those kinds of jokes 400 years ago
Shakespeare knew about Tennessee?
Very funny
That's a good one!
A Higgs Boson particle walked into a cathedral, and the priest said, "I'm sorry, but we don't allow Higgs Boson particles in this cathedral." The Higgs Boson particle asked, "Then how can you have mass?"
Muslim walks into a bar and there's no bar left 💥
my dad told me this joke when I was 7, around 1967.. only it was a hippie instead of a politician :)
I don't remember ever hearing that joke before, but he said it, and he said it very well.
My father was Jewish, and loved hiking. My wife, also Jewish, is right now hiking. She's Jewish, to.
Why don't you take a hike?
I'm Jewish and I love hiking as well! 😀
Being from TN, l agree with the pig and the cow.
"Do you think it's funny? It's not so funny to get a jew to go hiking"😂
That was funny & true!!!
Politicians are the worst 😱
That’s why we love Trump
❤❤❤TrumpTrain❤❤❤
I wouldn’t say it’s “Ha Ha Funny”. But I like it.
That's a funny joke. Maybe the audience will get it later. 😊
Andy Cap went on a bus tour of Glasgow.
Tour guide: If you look to the left, we are now passing the oldest pub in Scotland,
Andy Cap. Why!?
Andy Cap.... Haven't heard that name in decades. (many , many decades).
Sting and the Edge walk into a bar and the bartender says "Oh, no!, not you two!"
schrodinger's cat walks into a bar and doesn't.
A grey goose walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says "Hey, we got a vodka named after you". The goose says "you have a vodka name Ralph?"
Brilliant, made me laugh out loud!
Wow! We’ve come a long way from the Irish, Italian and PolakS!
When I was young in South Dakota it was usually about Norwegians ....
Like the Norwegian who rented an outhouse from a farmer ....
Next week the farmer went out to see how he was doing and saw that he had a TV antenna on the roof ....
After another week he saw that there were TWO antennas on the roof ....
He was curious about why and so he went out there and asked the Norwegian renter why there was a second antenna on the roof ... ??
"I sublet the basement to a Swedish fella"
Presuming he's a respected Rabbi, he opened "Do you think this is funny?" He set this serious tone that allowed the joke to fall flat. Oddly I agree with the cow and pig.
Ok, this is a funny joke LMAO!!! 😂🤣 Can't wait to retell it! 👍
Hindu and jew was the problem with the joke. The punchline was fine.
The punchline was obvious, but still very funny because it's true.
Actuallly they replaced Muslims with the politician.. Politicians are not that bad..
Muslims don't force the cows out rather they eat their tasty meat.
@@mujeebhamid2670yes they even f there cousin sisters, and also there aunties no sense of family only f anyone in the family like pdfiles
☠☠
actually, Muslims and Jews have many of the same restrictions... so whaddya want? if it furthers your purpose, we can replace the word Politician with Republican or Democrat... cuz i'm sure half of the readers here will agree that the other side is not fit to eat or sleep with the pigs
I can smell the lack of a social life from here .
I love when you can see the punch line coming from so far away. : ) Good old fashioned joke.
I didnt see it coming.
40 years wandering in a desert will cure you of hiking .
Can't say I've ever seen a joke start off w/a defensive comedian. He told this joke rather flatly too and the audience was a dud. All in all, a fail. No Jew should ever fail as a comedian. It's in our DNA.
That's funny! I didn't see it coming. LOL
I was worried in the first half, ngl.
But. Yeah. That one is pretty good
That was hilarious 😂😂😂😂
A good one. Animals are smart. What about people?? Not so much😂
A horse walked into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?"
My grandpa used to say -
Prostitutions and politics are the oldest profession in the world
But atleast prostitutes have some dignity
A transvestite walks into a Catholic Church at the end of the service as the priest is processing down the aisle swinging a censor. The transvestite says to the priest, "Honey, I love your dress but your purse is on fire."
A good one. Only a politician can manage to do this🤣
C'mon Moses hiked for 40 years
I know a lot of Rabbi's in Haifa and Jerusalem, and frequent visiting Rabbi's from England and the USA, they can be some of the funniest people ever, especially after a kosher vino or three.... Often it's just in the way they tell it...
Bravo, Sir! Spot on. 💙
Goes to show that animals have pretty high standards when it comes to character
GOOD ONE!!!!!
👍😂 FUNNY JOKE. THE AUDIENCE ARE WAITING FOR PERMISSION TO LAUGH,SOMEONE FORGOT TO HOLD UP THE PROMPTER ! Bhaaaaa Bhaàaaaaà 👌✌️
I heard this joke years ago but instead of a politician it was a Pollack. Glad to hear it was changed.
Why? Are you a pollack?
Hilarious!!
I’m using this one!!! 😂
The crowd did laugh , the mic didn't pick up enough noise
Brilliant. Unfortunately it's never been so true.
I knew the cow and the pig were coming.
Thank you for the laugh.
I laughed for 5 minutes just reading the title! Then I laughed some more at the rest of it!
A kid, a Rabbi, a doctor and a lawyer are flying on a plane.
The plane hits turbulence and the engines break down.
The pilot says "Everybody jump off, the plane is about the crash", takes a parachute and jumps off.
Three parachutes are left
"I'm a world-class surgeon and people around the world need me", says the doctor and jumps off the plane
"I'm an international genius and intellectual", says the lawyer and jumps off
"Son, I'm now old and my time had come", says the Rabbi to the kid, "take the last parachute and dive off"
"The world's smartest man", says the kid "jumped the plane with my lunchbox bag"
This was an old joke we used to say in the 80s. But it was about the Irishman, Eng and Scot
That was funny. Tough crowd.
There are two reasons that jump out with the punchline which delays laughter. It's obvious the animals can't sleep with the politician but also the politician could've sent them out of the barn to have the beds
They had to go hiking because nobody would serve them in the bar.
What a sorry bunch of crowd man. This was a good joke and needed a much better response
I thought it was brilliant poor animals.😂
Here in India, for the main (national) elections.. i did not go to vote till the 'NOTA' (none of the above) was introduced to anonymously reject all candidates.
(Prior to that the option was not anonymous. One had to fill some forms or something.. to submit the right to reject all candidates.)
Even now, in the General Elections (national elections), the NOTA option is mostly symbolic only.
The crux of my point is.. that. 🐖pigliticians🐗 are 🐖pigliticians🐗. All are the same.
That was funny! Weird crowd.
A Jew and a Hindu are alive in Tennessee - that's the joke
Good one!
😂
The real joke is when the animals were kicked out of the barn in the name of self defence by somebody