Dear Single Moms!

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  • Опубликовано: 11 сен 2024

Комментарии • 1,1 тыс.

  • @fjgri8467
    @fjgri8467 3 года назад +733

    As a woman with no kids, I have the upmost respect for single moms. I look at some of my friends who are single mother's and I literally wonder where the strength comes from. Respect

    • @jearodz
      @jearodz 3 года назад +51

      Thank You in behalf of all the single mothers.

    • @thelmathomas8414
      @thelmathomas8414 3 года назад +36

      Lala you are so awesome for speaking positivity towards single mothers because all I ever hear is straight hatred toward us. Your amazing and God bless you

    • @sephrah_precious
      @sephrah_precious 3 года назад +17

      Literally take each day as it comes! Thanks hun xxx

    • @mstoshsilkmewest4909
      @mstoshsilkmewest4909 3 года назад +23

      🙌🏾🙌🏾 All the GLORY goes to GOD hun… HE is our strength..!!!

    • @singlemothersthriving
      @singlemothersthriving 3 года назад +7

      ❤️❤️

  • @Bgrace15
    @Bgrace15 3 года назад +460

    Tony, I completely agree. I'm a single mother to a child with a disability. I've been divorced 5 years and people are still confused as to why I'm still single. I don't trust any man around my child. Since divorcing I've only been in 1 relationship and he never met my daughter and was offended I didn't want him around her inside of a year. It ended and God revealed so much about him. He had a porn addiction and other scary vices. I don't consider these things small because of you and to some people it wasn't enough to end it because he was a 'good' guy but I know God was protecting me and my daughter. I thank God he never had access to my body too because that could have hindered my judgement with his 'good guy' persona. Single mom, God's got us. Don't let your heart become so desparate, that you eat any lies. ♥️

    • @mirandaholley9797
      @mirandaholley9797 3 года назад +11

      Proud of you💐

    • @Bgrace15
      @Bgrace15 3 года назад +40

      @@mirandaholley9797 Thank you. My situation is unique because my daughter cannot speak or communicate so I have to be extra cautious. I can only thank God to be honest.♥️

    • @mirandaholley9797
      @mirandaholley9797 3 года назад +7

      @@Bgrace15 All praise to the Most High God!

    • @reinaquisha9418
      @reinaquisha9418 3 года назад +8

      @@Bgrace15 hi sis. I'm also a single mother to a special 😇. Bless you and your daughter❤️💜💚

    • @nikkinanette8807
      @nikkinanette8807 3 года назад +4

      Amen, thanks for sharing.

  • @cindeed4422
    @cindeed4422 3 года назад +475

    Raised a 20 year old daughter as a single mom for 6 years. Her dad passed away when she was 14. She’s on her own now. I avoided dating until she was grown. It was better for her. I’m glad I did. Women don’t want to be alone either but I had to do what was best for my child.

    • @LadyAngela678
      @LadyAngela678 3 года назад +31

      You did right. Good job mom.

    • @stormyv.8890
      @stormyv.8890 3 года назад +45

      A woman who waits until her children are out of the house and grown. is a real mother.. men really don't want to raise other men's kids.

    • @Utoober729
      @Utoober729 3 года назад +9

      My hubs died when our child just turned 11 yrs. I had to protect her.

    • @girlwakeuppodcast4622
      @girlwakeuppodcast4622 3 года назад +20

      Kuddos to you! My Daughter's 12 years old,I have the same mindset. We been rocking solo since she was 2 days old yes 2 DAYS old!

    • @AriLoves723
      @AriLoves723 3 года назад +1

      Are you dating or in a relationship now ?

  • @koastalpeach4535
    @koastalpeach4535 3 года назад +363

    Single moms forgive yourselves, the child you carried in your womb, deserves all of you. That man didn’t fully accept you with the gift of immortality you gave him.

    • @queenofhearts1138
      @queenofhearts1138 3 года назад +30

      Peach, I needed to hear this thank you for this comment!!!!! I'm tired of crying over it. It happened, the kid is here. He has moved forward without a thought, why shouldn't I ??? I am going to live my life and be happy with my blessing. He has been cut out.

    • @aze7324
      @aze7324 3 года назад +4

      Yes a good word

    • @melb1003
      @melb1003 3 года назад +20

      I cried reading this. I have felt the guilt so strong of bringing my child into a situation where they are being raised in a single parent home. Wasn't my plan but it happened. I accept it.

    • @tstar5944
      @tstar5944 3 года назад +10

      Some lost a husband which made them single. What's to forgive?

    • @koastalpeach4535
      @koastalpeach4535 3 года назад +9

      @@melb1003 it’s okay, sweetheart. Your going to continue to be a great mom. Forgive yourself, practice at your own speed forgiving him for not being the man you needed him to be. Set your boundaries with yourself to protect your heart, but allow for your child to build a healthy, happy relationship with his/her father. Can’t go back and change that, now. All is well. Thru Christ all things are possible.

  • @ceejones6489
    @ceejones6489 3 года назад +498

    This is why I learn from both Tony Gaskins and Bishop RC Blake’s, we need to be able to hear something and know immediately to walk/run away. Because Bishop Blake’s teaches women like he’s your father, to raise our Queen consciousness(remember who we really are, and to shake off the worldly views always being thrown at us), and Tony Gaskins is like the male friend/brother you never had who is going to pull you aside and give you the inside track on everything. Listening to both of them can pull any woman out of the confusion that is not of God.

    • @nickab2691
      @nickab2691 3 года назад +28

      Well said. I listen to them both as well.

    • @mianorris6696
      @mianorris6696 3 года назад +12

      I love them both; they give such great advice!

    • @HoodFairytalesInc
      @HoodFairytalesInc 3 года назад +6

      Girl Yeeeessss!

    • @her.saving
      @her.saving 3 года назад +9

      yes! love listening to RC

    • @andreenmckay443
      @andreenmckay443 3 года назад +11

      Love me some RC Blakes and Tony ♥️

  • @nicholediamond2430
    @nicholediamond2430 3 года назад +145

    Ladies, please stop being thirsty and desperate. Sometimes you need to learn how to be by yourself and just love yourself.

    • @isachick1
      @isachick1 3 года назад +14

      A freakin men!!!!! I’ve been divorced and HAPPILY single for the past 3yrs! I WAS that woman that was desperate for a man for yrs!!! NOT ANYMORE THANK GOD!!!

    • @Glamrocs
      @Glamrocs 3 года назад +4

      @@isachick1 Divorce 5 years and learning to accept this is my new life until my youngest is 18 took sometime but I’ll be okay

    • @isachick1
      @isachick1 3 года назад

      @Glamrocs good for you!!! Yes you will be just fine!

    • @janaywilliams2238
      @janaywilliams2238 3 года назад +2

      Amen I can really say I love being alone with my kids I lose no sleep I wake up happy yes I have my days where I’m crying but after that I’m happy

  • @Joyjoy2339
    @Joyjoy2339 3 года назад +190

    Moral of the story is you MUST learn and grow. Whether you had a child in marriage or out of wedlock. Your child is the main priority, period. A man can wait. Singleness is not a curse. Using this to remind myself to not loose my joy being desperate for love, and causing me to miss red flags.

    • @Thaofficialsensei
      @Thaofficialsensei Год назад +3

      Yea that’s true but how long you gone wait until your old and unattractive. Women gotta take motherhood and relationships more seriously don’t take it far as to sleep around raw it’s too many contraceptives to prevent these things. Do it right the first time

    • @Diamond_InTheRuff
      @Diamond_InTheRuff Год назад +4

      Nobody is perfect. Nobody will always get it right the first time.

    • @DanielaL702
      @DanielaL702 Год назад

      Amen, truth.

  • @mal1075
    @mal1075 3 года назад +213

    Finished this entire video.
    I will say, I don't view my children as a curse. I believe they are a blessing.
    As much work as they are....they make life so much better.❤️

    • @LBoogy202
      @LBoogy202 3 года назад +22

      👏🏽I am with you on that sister! My son is the best unplanned event that could've ever happened to me. I had to stop being around female "friends" because they were suspect. It's women out here that will watch your son grow up and waiting for them to come into manhood. I want having it! He's 26 and amazing now.

    • @honeywest39j95
      @honeywest39j95 2 года назад +7

      @@LBoogy202 and it’s so creepy when older women scope out younger men. That is so weird to me.

    • @daughterofzion2146
      @daughterofzion2146 2 года назад

      Same! Love my babies and loving MYSELF! If TMH has someone whom HE created as my soulmate then so be it. If not, I'll be just fine🙂🙏🏽

    • @takilove3566
      @takilove3566 Месяц назад

      @@mal1075 The children are not , but the ACT is and that sin will have its own consequences

  • @sylviasalcedo8569
    @sylviasalcedo8569 3 года назад +177

    Ok, ladies..I know I already commented but these stories are evil what these men are doing. I work for the military and the things women go through in their own home is unspeakable. We really have a serious problem. Instead of laying with these men, we need to be casting out demons. Honestly if you ask the Lord with a sincere open heart to come into the relationship and ask Him, "Lord, show me if this man is for me and my child, bring what is in the dark, out to the light." I promise you, HE WILL SHOW YOU! He never has failed me with that. ❤️ It's a hard question to ask, but it will save you pounds of heartache and consequences.

    • @IamKarryanne
      @IamKarryanne 3 года назад +5

      Truth‼️

    • @thegreatconsciousnessrenai7221
      @thegreatconsciousnessrenai7221 3 года назад +1

      If you have to ask...he isn't the one.

    • @---nj7hl
      @---nj7hl 3 года назад

      Amen!!!

    • @salenasheppherd7551
      @salenasheppherd7551 2 года назад +4

      @@thegreatconsciousnessrenai7221 That's not true, it's always good to still consult the Lord for His CONFIRMATION regardless of how "sure" or "confident" you may be in the man you're seeing.

  • @loripaylor495
    @loripaylor495 3 года назад +58

    As a single mother I have to agree with you Tony 💯. Its a hard pill to swallow but I’ve learned to sit down and wait on the Lord.

  • @jocelynwilson9243
    @jocelynwilson9243 3 года назад +172

    Single and divorced mother of 3 boys. After 5 years of being divorced, I'm still not ok with bringing someone I've met around my kids. Needless to say, nothing has been long term so I'm glad I made the choice not to bring temporary people around them. Although I sometimes wish for a good partner, I'll just continue to be single.

    • @jearodz
      @jearodz 3 года назад +8

      Ditto, and also divorced from a 10 year marriage(toxic), 3 boys now teenagers and 11 yrs Single Mom

    • @tashadavis607
      @tashadavis607 3 года назад +5

      @Priscilla they usually already have a new partner that's why most of the break ups happened. She may be new to the kids but she's not new to him. So he feels it's time for the kids to meet her because she's been around for a while.

    • @jocelynwilson9243
      @jocelynwilson9243 3 года назад +4

      @Priscilla I don't like it but there's nothing I can do about it. Men will do what they want and swear they're right. Most men don't like being alone so there's always woman after woman until they find the right one and as a result, the kids will see that happening. But, that doesn't have any impact on me wanting to bring multiple men around them. I'll continue to do as I have been.

    • @Neosoulkid90
      @Neosoulkid90 2 года назад

      You had 3 kids by a man.. actually your husband but you divorced him? Instead of working things through for the kids you thought of yourself? You deserve to be alone and single.. yuck

    • @sharonphelps4300
      @sharonphelps4300 2 года назад +1

      Amen! I feel the same way! I have such peace in my home....

  • @diamondinthesky723
    @diamondinthesky723 3 года назад +69

    I absolutely love the part where Tony says, I am going to raise my child with peace, with pleasure, with poise. Yes, Lord I receive this message in my life-in the name of Jesus Christ...Amen!

  • @jessepera2457
    @jessepera2457 3 года назад +110

    This is my game plan as a single mom:
    -no sex until after the wedding reception (one year and 9 mo. abstinent so far) single & NOT looking😇
    - no meeting my son until engaged
    -no meeting his family until engaged
    -no coming over to my house
    -no overnight visits to either house
    -no cheap house dates period
    -no controlling behavior (check him early)
    -no disrespect (check him early)
    -no loud arguing / discussions only (check him early)
    - no making me an option. I'm a priority.
    - no profanity/ swearing
    -no drinking / smoking/ nasty movies
    - no 50/50 paying. My wallet doesn't exist around a man
    - be independent and take care of my own bills and my household
    - always look beautiful and well groomed
    -no sex talk/language (slippery slope)
    -listen more than I speak (gather data on him. Let him talk)
    - keep firm and stern boundaries w my sons father (hold him accountable through the legal system. Not my stress anymore)
    -keep leveling up financially and anyone who wants to be w me is gonna have to catch me on the way up🚀😘✌️

    • @iamflay3776
      @iamflay3776 2 года назад +2

      Took these notes

    • @beac8238
      @beac8238 2 года назад +29

      I advise meeting his family and friends prior to engagement. It is part of the vetting process. Don’t put too much weight on meeting them. Put weight on their character and if you see any discrepancies.

    • @Terryon1219
      @Terryon1219 Год назад

      Noted! Thank you momma

    • @untamedt7353
      @untamedt7353 Год назад +4

      How is this working for you? A year later?

    • @sunset2798
      @sunset2798 Год назад +11

      If you’re tryna trap a brother just say that, you are not a virgin you have a whole child. A man should not have to abide by that long list of rules that you have HUMBLE yourself.

  • @brittblessed
    @brittblessed 3 года назад +134

    Tony...I've never seen that look in your eyes before. You were so direct in this video. The Lord was speaking through you in this video. It is so good. Be blessed!

    • @rikkibreeden5233
      @rikkibreeden5233 3 года назад

      Agreed. It was eerie, but very powerful

    • @brittblessed
      @brittblessed 3 года назад

      @@rikkibreeden5233 hmmm... I wouldn't label it as eerie, because I wasn't frightened or didn't find it to be strange. I can tell the Lord was using him to give a direct or stern message. In addition, I'm glad we both enjoyed it. 🙂

    • @rikkibreeden5233
      @rikkibreeden5233 3 года назад +4

      Eerie doesn't necessarily mean scary or frightening. Just mysterious even supernatural. As you mentioned at that moment it really looked like the Lord was speaking through him.

    • @Loyaltyisalifestyle
      @Loyaltyisalifestyle 3 года назад +1

      Same thing I thought.

    • @moishacurry4611
      @moishacurry4611 3 года назад +1

      YESSSS!!! The Holy Spirit completely took over him!

  • @melaniebarnes4374
    @melaniebarnes4374 3 года назад +100

    This video is right on time . Not about the single motherhood for me but the fact that a man can secretly despise a woman and still be with her

    • @lekeshiacole9065
      @lekeshiacole9065 3 года назад +14

      It’s sad. I went through this with my ex. And he hated the fact I loved and adore my son’s and my son had to put hands on him because he hated our relationship and he knew I knew he wasn’t a good father to his own. Fast forward 2 years later. We are going strong without the clown

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +2

      And they call us crazy 😒

    • @gigibrown_wright
      @gigibrown_wright 3 года назад +11

      Yes! And it’s in the Bible. The story of Jacob, Rachel, and Leah. Leah had several sons with Jacob but he never loved her.

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +3

      @@LA-wv7gf I'm glad you were able to see it. A lot of guys are like that unfortunately. You have to listen how he talks about *other* women.

    • @erickaj7373
      @erickaj7373 3 года назад +8

      Was with a guy for years who, now that I look back, hated me. And all of his actions said that even tho his words said opposite.

  • @arandaholley1719
    @arandaholley1719 3 года назад +243

    Ladies with kids, I am a lawyer and this child abuse is not rare but common. When Tony talks about discretion most women do not have this level in dating. I pray for these kids.

    • @girlwakeuppodcast4622
      @girlwakeuppodcast4622 3 года назад +2

      So true!

    • @CeCe-os3ul
      @CeCe-os3ul 3 года назад +11

      This is why I’m not having sex until marriage. I don’t want to take the chance of being a single mom in the dating market.

    • @arandaholley1719
      @arandaholley1719 3 года назад +4

      @@CeCe-os3ul All Power And Glory To The Most High And Ancient Of Days.

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад +1

      Single mothers are dumb asses. Close your fucking legs and stop sharing your womb with men who don’t give a fuck about you and your offspring’s well-being.I HATE single mothers. They get in the way of happy endings with their burdensome, needy situation.

    • @arandaholley1719
      @arandaholley1719 3 года назад +14

      @@indigobricks7442 Get help and seek God..

  • @KrystleLaughter
    @KrystleLaughter 3 года назад +162

    Married to a man for 8 years. Had 2 kids prior. We had 5 together. He never loved my children or treated them like his own. Was mentally and emotionally abusive. Looking back I see that I didn’t know how to love myself. I thought I needed to be married to be happy. It’s not worth it! Never put a man before your children. Love yourself, and create a happy life for you and your children.

    • @trueabby1162
      @trueabby1162 3 года назад +3

      Wow, sorry you had to go through that.

    • @eheheh3263
      @eheheh3263 3 года назад +10

      If he didn’t love your children or treated them like his own why would you think it was a good idea to have kids with him??? I was raised by a single mother and my “mother” brought a man and he never acted like a father or a father figure... he was horrible, an assh*le to me and my “mother” would never say or do anything... she would always take his side and I feel so betrayed by her... I want nothing to do with her... I hate her... and she was toxic too, but society doesn’t like to talk about these mothers because society feels sorry for them and are always viewed as the victims when in reality the majority of them are the victims of their own choices... but props to the good single mothers who actually love their children and put them above anything or anyone... some women forget that they are mothers before they are women

    • @TheDaniMilan
      @TheDaniMilan 3 года назад +1

      @@eheheh3263 I’m sorry you had to go through that. Some mothers are blindsided and don’t even realize til it’s too late

    • @eheheh3263
      @eheheh3263 3 года назад +5

      @@TheDaniMilan Thank You. I’m doing great. these “mothers” know exactly what they’re doing, they sacrifice their kids... let them get mistreated by their men because if they say anything or do anything to defend them their men can walk away... and they don’t want that because they can’t pay the rent alone, they need his 50% to survive... so they act blind and deaf while their children get treated like crap because it’s convenient

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад

      Why would he love and treat children that he did not create as if they are his own?? You are DELUSIONAL. Your children were an exhausting burden. The world does no revolve around the idiotic, foolish decisions you made with your womb. The second you expect a new partner to orbit his existence around your dumb decision to create offspring with the wrong man is the moment you become a less valuable partner.

  • @marilynking527
    @marilynking527 3 года назад +548

    Don’t settle ladies. That’s why some men like to belittle you for being a single mom so you’ll lower standards. It’s plenty of good men who will still want you as a single mom but never settle!!!

    • @aze7324
      @aze7324 3 года назад +7

      𝕐𝔼𝕊

    • @jessicahall8190
      @jessicahall8190 3 года назад +15

      Exactly! I laugh at the things I hear!

    • @micheleprice9771
      @micheleprice9771 3 года назад +2

      AMEN! SO TRULY RIGHT! GREAT INSPIRING AMAZING ENLIGHTENING WORDS OF WISDOM! ALWAYS SETTLE FOR THE BEST! LET GOD HANDLE THE REST! GOD IS WORKIN IT OUT! ON HIS GOD GIVEN RIGHT TIME! GOD IS OUR EVERYTHING! GOD CAN HANDLE ANYTHING! HOLD ON TO GOD ALWAYS! PRAY OFTEN AND DAILY TO GOD ALWAYS! GLORY TO GOD ALMIGHTY! GOD IS ALWAYS WITH US! GOD WILL NEVER LEAVE U NOR FORSAKE U! GOD WILL SEE US THRU ALL THINGS IN YR LIFE RIGHT NOW AND ALWAYS! GOD GOT U COVERED! TELL THE LORD THANK U FOR THIS BLESSED TODAY! TELL THE LORD THANK U FOR EVERYONE IN YR LIFE RIGHT NOW AND ALWAYS! BE GRATEFUL AND THANKFUL FOR ALL THINGS IN YR LIFE RIGHT NOW AND ALWAYS! GOD BLESS US ALL ! GOD LOVES US ALL! SELF LOVE! BELOVED! LET YR LIGHT 4EVER SHINE BRIGHT! SMILE ALWAYS!( EVEN IN STORMS THAT U GO THRU!) PEACE AND HARMONY TO EVERYONE IN THE WORLD RIGHT NOW! YES INDEED! ENOUGH SAID! THATS IT! SEPT 2021

    • @alexisstarr7825
      @alexisstarr7825 3 года назад +1

      Thank you 💜

    • @Neosoulkid90
      @Neosoulkid90 2 года назад +3

      Wait what??? Any man who deals with a single mother will MOST DEFINITELY BE SETTLING for you😂 you say single moms should lower their standards well what should they do since the man they brought life into this world with didn’t want to be with you? Single moms that have children out of a product of sexual irresponsibility deserve to be alone

  • @TheEstherAcademy
    @TheEstherAcademy 3 года назад +74

    I believe God just elevated you in the spirit for this message!!!!! You just knocked a legion of demons in the face 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼

    • @NekeishaWise
      @NekeishaWise 3 года назад +4

      He certainly DID 🧡🕊

    • @mixmickeymouzze
      @mixmickeymouzze 3 года назад +3

      Especially when he said you got to knock that knight in shining armor in the head with a bottle and slap him with the Holy Bible 😭😭😂😂😂😂🙌🏿💯💯 All praises to the Most High

    • @TheEstherAcademy
      @TheEstherAcademy 3 года назад

      @@mixmickeymouzze right exactly 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😭

    • @TheEstherAcademy
      @TheEstherAcademy 3 года назад +1

      @@NekeishaWise most people daddy daughter talks wasn’t coming with this type of heat (wisdom)

  • @HoodFairytalesInc
    @HoodFairytalesInc 3 года назад +159

    Single mom of 4...been struggling with accepting it. Watching single moms growing up including MY MOM... I told myself that I could never do this, that it was a FEAR of mine 😢😥 now here I am single sad and miserable! But I needed this message not because Im desperate for a man but I needed to HEAR Tony say that I need to ACCEPT the choices I made for my life and protect my babies because I did what I did to get them here!!! I have a chance to do better now and teach my babies the right way to do things. Thank you, thank you, thank you Tony for this POWERFUL message! I watched your "Develop in the Dark" Video too Smh It literally awakened my soul been watching it over and over again!

    • @queenofhearts1138
      @queenofhearts1138 3 года назад +8

      I am also struggling to accept, my child is 7. I just cry and pray.

    • @ceejones6489
      @ceejones6489 3 года назад +9

      I have been working on this message to you for a while now, I just want to say satan isn’t going to send a predator your way that you can sniff out from miles away. If he worked like that, no one would ever fall for it. When “something” happens an apology later can never remove the pain/trauma a predator has already inflicted. The person who violated me in my home was a good looking black man who women fell over themselves for, who could and did sweep all kinds of beautiful women off their feet including my mom(gorgeous woman). Guess what, he had a thing for girls…I was a SHY, obedient 15 year old. I experienced being touched before but never at home. His energy was off, so I was always fully dressed and around my mom or in my room when he visited. None of that mattered, I was moved away, my mom found out later it wasn’t my fault when she found pics in his phone of him with other young girls, then that he was touching someone else we knew. Protect your babies at all cost. Much love to you queen 💗.

    • @aliyah369
      @aliyah369 3 года назад +6

      Same. Pregnant with my first child and I feel so ashamed. It’s a tough battle for sure. Respect to you.

    • @aaliyaheman
      @aaliyaheman 3 года назад +3

      Still forgiving myself for this also. It’s definitely a journey. My pastor preached a message today about not believing the lies of the enemy. The enemy is the father of lies and often dresses his lie with a bit of the truth. For instance (for me) something he said to me that I believed was that it was my fault as why this happened and that I was to feel ashamed and guilty about it. But what’s real is although yes, I brought both my babies into this world, children are a blessing from God and if God did not want me to have them He could’ve have made me without..but God saw fit to bless me with them. And He has forgiven me with how I’ve brought them here and so it is time to move on, forgive ourselves and walk with our heads held high. Unashamed.

    • @jennib9953
      @jennib9953 3 года назад +4

      @@aliyah369 Congratulations on your pregnancy. Enjoy your pregnancy and don't be ashamed. That energy will go into your heart don't allow that. Take pictures while your pregnant enjoy eating your cravings. Embrace your new love that is now your baby. If people are being negative be around them less so you don't feel some type of way. Plan your pregnancy with the father if available or a good friend or family member who can be their for you to hear you and support your emotional roller-coaster lol. Plan your baby shower and look at childcare centers if you plan to have your baby in one. I been there and I use to feel the same way but when I had other children I decided nobody was going to have me to feel that way no more. Take your power back and enjoy your life with your baby on the way. Congratulations again!

  • @ashlimo481
    @ashlimo481 3 года назад +86

    My problem is I ignored all the signs that slapped me in the face day 1, I even had conversation with God, and he said as long you stay knowing it ain’t right you’ll get everything you deserve and that’s exactly what happened. 3/12 years later and a child now he doesn’t even see his child say it’s easier to not have a relationship with her because he’s now back with his 1st BM, It is what it is never again tho! We cause a lot of our own pain by ignoring the signs from the start.

    • @SweetP4real1
      @SweetP4real1 3 года назад +14

      I did that a whole lot in a lot of my past bad and horrific relationships ignoring the early signs of red flags, but nevertheless you can't beat yourself up,we're all human being's looking for love however sometimes in all of the wrong places. The reason sometimes we ignore the early signs is because we want things to work out, we want to give the sorry ass men the benefit of the doubt until we're forced to accept and deal with the reality of things. Keep your head up and be encouraged.

    • @reinaquisha9418
      @reinaquisha9418 3 года назад +4

      Wisdom❤️

    • @antoniaadams2084
      @antoniaadams2084 3 года назад +4

      God wouldn't say that to you, thats not how he speaks.

  • @ceejones6489
    @ceejones6489 3 года назад +87

    Single mother of 2, not settling for a mess. I see women without kids dealing with more than I ever have. Men will use any excuse to justify not treating you like you deserve to be treated.

  • @VintageAfro91
    @VintageAfro91 3 года назад +88

    Tony’s speaking the truth. I remember when I was between the ages of 12-14 and my mom and I moved in with this man and the day we moved in he showed his hatred towards me. He even told me once that “oh your mom will never leave me.” She eventually left when she really saw how he was, but it took her two years. They start off charming in the beginning. He was super charming in the beginning. Once you’re in their territory or they have you alone, the real them shows up.

    • @VintageAfro91
      @VintageAfro91 3 года назад +7

      @@kaleema1987 the crazy thing is it did NOT take long for that mask to fall off. It was literally the day we moved in with him and I gave his dogs too much food by accident and he went into a rage and called me a moron. At that moment I knew he was crazy.

    • @geminilady39
      @geminilady39 3 года назад

      Facts!!🙌🏽

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад +1

      The hatred stemmed from you being a non-stop, permanent reminder of a man who was in your mother’s bed. Giving your resources to another person’s child is an exhausting burden. That’s money that could be going into a retirement fund or vacation money yet is being used to feed and clothe a child he did not create. It is your mother’s fault for sharing her womb with the wrong men.

    • @ebrown86
      @ebrown86 2 года назад +2

      @@indigobricks7442 then he should've decided not to get with a woman with a child. He should've made better decisions.

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 2 года назад +1

      @@ebrown86 Easier said than done. Lots of people find a soulmate and can’t stand their kid/the permanent reminder of their ex

  • @Dr.Elaine1
    @Dr.Elaine1 3 года назад +57

    “When you understand the attributes of God, then that’s when you going to understand this man.” TG

  • @aliciacutiepie19
    @aliciacutiepie19 3 года назад +78

    As a single pregnant woman I am so grateful I came across this video now. This literally gave me chills! Thank you Tony! God bless you for being so straight forward and honest with us.

  • @s.rebeiro110
    @s.rebeiro110 3 года назад +102

    my deceased aunt use to say "don't even cut an onion for a man cause the ring will be as far as the moon." lol

  • @RocSkater09
    @RocSkater09 3 года назад +58

    He speaking facts!!!!!!! Wow. Man idunno who he preaching for. But I really hope they heed his wise words and warning. God's timing is best timing. God bless you Tony for sharing such a deep message.

  • @aliciawoods8925
    @aliciawoods8925 3 года назад +136

    I have so much respect for single mothers., the ones that goes above and beyond to care for her kiddos. That’s a special lady and she should NEVER feel less than.

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад +2

      She IS less than. She has less time, energy, focus, resources, and availability to offer due to her illegitimate, out of wedlock child. Nobody grows up hoping and wishing to be a stepparent.

    • @aliciawoods8925
      @aliciawoods8925 3 года назад +7

      @Indigo Bricks Gone weirdo 😂

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад

      @@aliciawoods8925 ...👀 Do those two words put together actually make intellectual sense to you?? If you can’t handle the truth then maybe you should stay out of comment sections.

    • @aliciawoods8925
      @aliciawoods8925 3 года назад +4

      @ Indigo Bricks Go head on somewhere creep... go spread that hate that you have somewhere else.

    • @aliciawoods8925
      @aliciawoods8925 3 года назад +2

      @ Indigo Bricks Also, who are you to say that someone is less than?? If your mom was a single mom, would you feel like she was less than?

  • @Dr.Elaine1
    @Dr.Elaine1 3 года назад +73

    “Keep that man out yo house til yo daughter out the house.” TG

    • @queenofhearts1138
      @queenofhearts1138 3 года назад +17

      My mother and I have lost any possibility of a relationship because of exactly this. She brought a vile pervert into my life, into my atmosphere and psyche. As a teen, he was licking his chops. I thank God every day for watching over me during my teenage years in that house. Single mothers do not understand. Bringing a man around your children is a tricky and dangerous thing.

    • @shutit4024
      @shutit4024 3 года назад +5

      Sadly even boys too

  • @christinewarren8134
    @christinewarren8134 3 года назад +43

    When Tony got to talking about "you don't have your favorite wine in you, your favorite pasta in you, your favorite shrimp scampi in you, your favorite movie on Netflix, haven't been touched in 6 months or 6 years " I was hollering 😭🤣🤣🤣🤣 like sir get out my life. My ex actually set all that up and I been abstinence for 3 years. Not today Satan.

  • @ssssshley
    @ssssshley 3 года назад +68

    This shit humbled me like a mf. Brought me to tears. Thank you Tony. I feel like I’ve been scolded by my older brother.

  • @dreadiaz1703
    @dreadiaz1703 3 года назад +48

    Tony holding back pounds of tears in this video. This man is busting his butt, making tons of sacrifices, just for yall to spit in his face. So many of yall in these comments STILL went and slept with that toxic grown boy even after watching this video and commenting how much it "touched" you.

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +5

      👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

    • @dreadiaz1703
      @dreadiaz1703 3 года назад +1

      @Bill Kapri , I feel like you're some lame alpha male, hiding behind a fake page that you just made on September 1st 2021. You've left countless amounts of negative comments about women under Tony Gaskins videos, which is disgusting and weird. I'm sorry you're broke, I'm sorry you're third leg isn't big enough, I'm sorry that you're looks challenged, and I'm sorry that you're butt hurt about it. BUT Tony can help you !!!! Head over to GrownBoy University and get your life. We're rooting for you Bro 🙌

  • @ashleybeverly7328
    @ashleybeverly7328 3 года назад +68

    My goodness, I'm not a mother but loved this message. It was such a wake up call for me. Single mamas, you got this.. please know you are worthy of real love❤

    • @valerieshinia8526
      @valerieshinia8526 3 года назад +1

      Thankyou.

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад

      Unless they’re a widow or formerly divorced, single mothers should go to hell. They get in the way with the dumb, idiotic, foolish decisions they made with their womb.

    • @kaeli1983
      @kaeli1983 2 года назад

      Thank you, Ashley

    • @346bre
      @346bre Год назад

      Same here sis, it was such a beautiful message. I have the upmost respect for single mothers !!

  • @victoriak.2707
    @victoriak.2707 3 года назад +56

    It’s so hard to hear the truth, the ugly truth about the crap single mother’s are subjected to in the dating world. I was manipulated And let myself be, just wanted to be happy. The loneliness and fear of being alone is real, makes us compromise ourselves in the worst ways. Men see this and take advantage for sure. I wish i could meet myself 10 years ago and show myself this video. Thank you Tony

    • @alenkabkk
      @alenkabkk 3 года назад +5

      I do t know why but I don’t have fear of being alone at all been single for almost 12 years since I was pregnant and I feel fine, maybe because I watch a lot of crime shows/documentaries and many MANY times it is child murdered/abused/molested by step-father/boyfriend of an IDIOT who introduced them to her children…. And yes I know there are good stories yes but they are VERY rare and the woman usually was friends with the guy for a long time before they got together! This fear alone of someone I brought to the house, hurting my child making me feel absolutely positive about the decision not to date/see/introduce anyone to my child! P.S. we have no relationship at all with bio father.

    • @ceejones6489
      @ceejones6489 3 года назад

      Unfortunately this is so common! We have to forgive ourselves. I let my ex-fiancée feed me so much hope that it did as the scripture says “Hope deferred makes the heart sick”. I listened to him instead of judging his actions(once the facade went away). I finally found RC Blake’s, and I think the very first video was about my situation and I cried so hard. I have now come out of that relationship FULLY, focusing on the 3 B’s Tony tells us to, and I am loving myself so much more, I hope you are too!

    • @tymakaeli1480
      @tymakaeli1480 2 года назад

      I can relate I know very much well what you talking about

  • @AllThingsTiffanyTV
    @AllThingsTiffanyTV 3 года назад +26

    Yes Mr Tony yell at us with conviction! We need it!

  • @staceythorpe7938
    @staceythorpe7938 3 года назад +69

    Never put a strange man as priority over your child(ren). In the times we are living in, he is not only capable of going after your daughter(s), he can go after your son(s) or even your pet dog 🐕 or cat 🐱.

    • @queenofhearts1138
      @queenofhearts1138 3 года назад +2

      this is the reason my relationship with my mother will never be repaired UNLESS God above does so. If my stepfather could have tasted the nectar he would have tried and he made passes all the while. I haven't spoken to hear in almost a year.

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад

      @@queenofhearts1138 Ugh I hate hearing stories like these! Glad you made it through! It's ok to forgive and *forget* those who put you in harms way. Trust me, they'll pay for what they've done! ✅

    • @beefaye6861
      @beefaye6861 3 года назад +1

      Dang.....evil lurks 👀

  • @KrystleLaughter
    @KrystleLaughter 3 года назад +41

    None of my family members showed up to my wedding. I thought they were hating. Turns out they were trying to help me.

  • @joannamartinez6882
    @joannamartinez6882 3 года назад +162

    There are some “coaches” that advice men to never date single mothers. They demean these women and make them appear as if they’re less for having children from a relationship that didn’t work 🤦🏻‍♀️ (I’m a divorced mother).
    They don’t realize that it’s best for these mothers (me) to be single than to be with the wrong person.

    • @ogeanazia3230
      @ogeanazia3230 3 года назад +12

      Yep.... coaches like Kevin Samuel's. Demeaning single mothers and leading men astray

    • @eerynessential
      @eerynessential 3 года назад +3

      Wow.. like wow!!! Like a lot of women are single moms because their spouse could have died naturally (in a sense) or been murdered... like Wow!!!!

    • @eerynessential
      @eerynessential 3 года назад +8

      And thats str8 up NARCISSISTIC of them so called Coaches...

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад +5

      The reality is that many men ended up getting used for their money as financial support for ungrateful, out of wedlock children and self-centered single mothers. The “package deal” means being treated like a second class citizen. I would advise any man to avoid dating single mothers unless their children are adults because they often think the world revolves around them and their mess.

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад +6

      @@eerynessential Most of them are single mothers because they couldn’t stop spreading their legs for the wrong man. Not because they reproduced in an honorable way, but because they were completely foolish and put their emotions and sexual needs before a solid plan for their offspring.

  • @akilahw
    @akilahw 3 года назад +79

    Praying for all the single moms❤️
    you guys are so strong!

  • @christinewarren8134
    @christinewarren8134 3 года назад +42

    You can date, but don't bring no one home to your kids who you are not sure of

  • @DEmpressEmpire
    @DEmpressEmpire 3 года назад +34

    I been a single mom for 10 yrs. I don't trust no one around my son. I'll wait till he's independent or till I meet someone that is looking for something solid and serious. I can't risk my peace. I've been stuck at home when everyone's been out living their life, but that is a price I'm willing to pay to protect my child. I think of my son as a gift 🎁 God gave me and I treat him as such. If he chooses the wrong path in life (God Forbid) I will be at peace because I did everything in my power to raise a good man with morals and integrity. This is so hard, it's takes Hella strength 💪 but God has never left my side, my overwhelming gratitude and faith to just be alive to see my son grow keeps me pushing. Stay strong Ladies it will be worth it !!!
    People say: I don't know how you do it ?! Me: Lol me either 🤣🤣💪

    • @lafea617
      @lafea617 3 года назад +2

      I FEEL AND HEAR YOU SIS, unfortunately as women, single women and SINGLE MOTHERS’ we will always have the short end of the stick. But please keep praying and loving on yourself and your son. You will get what you desire and deserve. Please believe that!

    • @teefosterx4398
      @teefosterx4398 2 года назад +1

      I love this. In the same position myself, as a single mum other single mothers like you that think like this give me strength ❤️ we not alone, we have a purpose & the purpose is our children X

    • @DEmpressEmpire
      @DEmpressEmpire 2 года назад +1

      @@teefosterx4398 Absolutely Darling 💪God will never turn his back on the mother's that prioritize the give he gave them!

  • @jessicahall8190
    @jessicahall8190 3 года назад +47

    The realest video ever! As a single mom, I fully accept my life as it is and am so focused on giving my daughter the best life I’m too distracted anyway lol. Being a single mom is not something I ever saw myself being but it didn’t stop my poor decisions. So when it I happened, I owned it and grew up immediately. Now my goal is to set my daughter up for greatness! If God decides to bless me with a husband, so be it! But I’m ok either way. She’s 4. I had her at 31. According to societal standards, I’m too old on top of having a child. So the pickings are extremely slim!🤣
    So we’ll see what God has in store!

  • @VioletRaya
    @VioletRaya 3 года назад +28

    Thank you Brother Tony
    As a single mom you just confirmed alot of concerns i have had about dating. I'm going to let someone go that i have not even met yet just was talking to them and signals went up real quick regarding my children. God just spoke to me through you.
    Thank you

  • @kaylasong10
    @kaylasong10 3 года назад +20

    “This man got to be hit over the head with a bottle of olive oil & a Holy Bible.” 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂 I actually was listening to this around 4am this morning and was snickering as I was half sleep. Had to play it again.

  • @olivialopez9323
    @olivialopez9323 3 года назад +41

    This is the best video I've seen. Love people that aren't afraid to speak the truth

  • @antoinetteesco1553
    @antoinetteesco1553 3 года назад +11

    He is right on point it almost heppen to me and my daughter he was dateing me and seen my daughter and looked for her on Facebook and was trying to hit on but my daughter got on her phone and told me mom please leave that man alone he is no good so please listen to Tony🙏

  • @robloxgang2691
    @robloxgang2691 2 года назад +14

    I'm a single mother of four kids. Husband left to be with another woman who has 2 kids. When I tell you I was holding onto the wall hearing this message. I will definitely have to replay this a couple of times because this right here, has done something to me today. I feel empowered so going to need to get this feeling weekly. God bless you and your beautiful family Tony, big love to the Queen Sheree Gaskins (I hope I spelt it correctly)

  • @pat4eva09
    @pat4eva09 3 года назад +30

    I also admire single moms. But I refuse to date a guy with kids. My preference, my standard. Too much goes along with outside kids.

    • @amazinggrace313
      @amazinggrace313 3 года назад +6

      Right on! I know single parents have a genre in the dating pool and they also deserve love, but NOT ME! wayyy too much foolishness and not worth the headache. I didn't make those kids so I won't be taking that responsibility.

    • @Bernadette.Burnie
      @Bernadette.Burnie 3 года назад +1

      That part.

    • @1234532785
      @1234532785 2 года назад +1

      Same!!! I’ve never been interested in dating men with kids. I don’t take them seriously. I’m with a man with none and we’re going to have that experience together when we are married.🥰

  • @Bgrace15
    @Bgrace15 3 года назад +30

    Single mom here and ready to learn 👏🏾 I also saw that question and was very confused she even had to ask if it was a red flag 🙈

  • @topazgraham2643
    @topazgraham2643 3 года назад +18

    Smh…I so agree with you Tony! I never looked at it this way, but single mothers have to be extremely careful. As a single women I taught we had it rough, but God please bless these single moms out here! Discernment and common sense is a MUST! Keep talking the truth Tony😞🥲🙏🏿😇

  • @SweetTreatsBy_Marie
    @SweetTreatsBy_Marie 3 года назад +23

    When God talks ... Please listen.. when Tony talks definitely listen.

  • @DD-mg2se
    @DD-mg2se 3 года назад +11

    I'm a single mom, and I don't put ANYTHING pass a man..no matter what position he holds. A woman told me I'm tripping when I told her I've never let my child father bathe her. Not even if I had a son. I once told an ex before he met my child, that if he looks at her in any wrong way, that's it for him,and I was with him three years before he met her. She was 6 by then. We got to keep our eyes and ears open when bringing people around our children. Constant Eyes/Ears On (C.E.E.O.)Be blessed.

  • @Ms.EllissaDeAnna
    @Ms.EllissaDeAnna 3 года назад +24

    It is better to be single and alone with God in order to grow in faith than suffer the consequences of children being abused because of not having self-control. Praying for the single parents and children involved. May you have a spirit of discerment and patience to wait upon the Lord🌼

  • @caramelmami7
    @caramelmami7 3 года назад +42

    I've always felt weird when a guy refers to himself as "Daddy" to me.

    • @fjgri8467
      @fjgri8467 3 года назад +13

      OMG me too...its cringy asf

    • @aze7324
      @aze7324 3 года назад +8

      Glad I'm not the only one

    • @isachick1
      @isachick1 3 года назад +3

      Yea agree!! 😣

    • @chumieoctober6921
      @chumieoctober6921 3 года назад +2

      Same here.. soo weird

  • @MsChristianr
    @MsChristianr 3 года назад +29

    My Auntie always says a man will put his thing in a cat if nobody is looking

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +5

      Your aunt is wise and understands men!

    • @beefaye6861
      @beefaye6861 3 года назад +1

      Lol....or a snake

  • @eagles-soar
    @eagles-soar 3 года назад +19

    Man of god, please don't leave US SINGLE WOMEN need that talk to!!! Give us a heads UP!!! Their are some of us who really appreciate and WANT the KNOWLEDGE!!!

    • @gigiFLOWER2023
      @gigiFLOWER2023 2 года назад

      Ultra Sis. I'm just hearing. Do you know if he had the zoom?

  • @LadyAngela678
    @LadyAngela678 3 года назад +74

    I’ve never understood a woman letting a man borrow her car.

    • @aze7324
      @aze7324 3 года назад +1

      Right

    • @noirfit9721
      @noirfit9721 3 года назад +6

      Desperate

    • @ButterCookie1984
      @ButterCookie1984 3 года назад +5

      Pickmesha's do this all the time.

    • @eerynessential
      @eerynessential 3 года назад +2

      I won't even let my Brother borrow my car! I can understand if he's driving & she's in her car with him. But no! I don't need You to take MY car to bring me to wrk & leave w my car🙄😂 *yawn...
      I remember this guy once asked to borrow my car. I whipped my head at him fast like excuse me? Especially after he said he crashed his bm car. Hellllll no😂 my own brother crashed his gf car before.. he gave her some money tho!! My brother that is..
      Now my male friend hell no😂I wouldn't let nobody drive my car. My 2nd car is paid off in 1 shot.. so nope!! That's me & my daughter's car!!

    • @angelavest7517
      @angelavest7517 3 года назад +4

      Folks put up with many things when they don't know their worth.

  • @valerieshinia8526
    @valerieshinia8526 3 года назад +18

    I needed this am asingle mom to a 8year old : unfortunately here in kenya men don't see there kids nor pay child support they don't do anything we just do it by yourself it's hard but we survive by the grace Of GOD .am also taking care of my younger siblings its really a heavy burden may GOD continue to give us more favour its not easy at all.

  • @mal1075
    @mal1075 3 года назад +26

    Single momma of 3 over here (all from my ex husband). ❤️ thank you for sharing your knowledge. Glory to God.

    • @jocelynwilson9243
      @jocelynwilson9243 3 года назад +5

      Same here...Single mama of 3 all from my ex-husband. I sometimes wish for a partner but then again raising my kids is most important to me. I have absolutely no interest in bringing different men around them.

    • @mal1075
      @mal1075 3 года назад +3

      @@jocelynwilson9243 God bless you, momma! ❤️❤️❤️ It's not an easy place to be, but Glory to God for our blessings. ❤️

    • @jocelynwilson9243
      @jocelynwilson9243 3 года назад +3

      @@mal1075 Thank you!! Same to you...We shall overcome💕

    • @P03ticJustice
      @P03ticJustice 3 года назад +1

      You don't need the disclaimer.

    • @laurenlocd3180
      @laurenlocd3180 3 года назад +1

      @@P03ticJustice she made sure to throw that in 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @MariahSincere
    @MariahSincere 3 года назад +16

    I’m a single mom and I cannot wait until my child’s father gets a woman. He ain’t had one seriously since we broke up 5 years ago. He be having my child looking tore up every time I FaceTime my daughter when she over there. The man clearly needs a woman to help!

  • @DsCompilations
    @DsCompilations 3 года назад +50

    i'm not a single mom yet this scared me straight 😢

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +2

      Babysitting scared me straight lol

    • @coollikethat2691
      @coollikethat2691 3 года назад +4

      Yet 👩‍🏫 so you'll waiting?

    • @amazinggrace313
      @amazinggrace313 3 года назад +1

      Good girl

    • @chumieoctober6921
      @chumieoctober6921 3 года назад +14

      From a Single Mom. Please be scared.. it’s not easy out here..

    • @erickaj7373
      @erickaj7373 3 года назад +3

      Don’t say yet. People are single mothers because they don’t protect their bodies and their future. Don’t allow a man to get you pregnant, wait until marriage, use protection or do what you HAVE TO do to not be a single mom (except for abortion, I’m against that). Protect your future love!

  • @ladyempire5921
    @ladyempire5921 3 года назад +20

    Absolutely love this particular content. As a survivor of single motherhood, Tony is speaking thee Truth! God has kept me in protection, my son is now 19 (15 yrs I was a single mother) and I'm glad that I waited. His life and safely had to come above any needs I had for a relationship. It's hard word but it is possible. God knows what you need Exactly when you need it. Now that he is an adult there is a level of peace.

  • @alishia4433
    @alishia4433 3 года назад +18

    I agree 100%. As a single mother of one girl I chose not to date until my daughter was older. Even during her teenaged years I still never allowed men to meet my daughter or spend time in the home where I raise her. When and if I meet the man that God intends for me. People may think your being overly cautious or try to make u feel like an off ball for choosing to be single for that season but please ignore them. I’ll the right man him to my daughter after he has been fully vetted, tried and true. Thank you Tony for confirming what I knew was right.

    • @Queen-ConsciousYa
      @Queen-ConsciousYa 9 месяцев назад

      Yes, my time is devoted to family and personal/career development. Im currently preparing for undergrad for Pre-Med and have 1 daughter, therefore dating is not even on my list of priorities. Also, men used to get mad at me because I never told them about my daughter.

  • @NaturalEmpress_Love
    @NaturalEmpress_Love 3 года назад +18

    This was an awesome message. I am a single mom of 3, all to the same man. It’s hard I want love with a man but, I want healthy, happy and safe children far more. I am 100% ok with the decision I’ve made not to date at this time.

  • @thebeautystarlet
    @thebeautystarlet 3 года назад +17

    This video makes me want to stay single and childless…these stories are heartbreaking.

  • @Famous423
    @Famous423 3 года назад +26

    I’ve always been very productive of my kids, no one gets to meet my kids because I’ve never been close to being engaged. Now I need to be more protective of myself. Sometimes we forget to protect ourselves.

  • @breewelch5982
    @breewelch5982 3 года назад +29

    That last part Tony where you vented & said it’s not fair, mom in another state, he out, I’m stuck in the house… that’s so real. I used to sound just like that until one day I realized this is fully my child & I have to walk this thang out. God has his reasons for us having these kids full time. It is what it is. Can’t waste my energy lamenting on it. Great video.

  • @candigirl1999
    @candigirl1999 3 года назад +36

    Know your strength... your identity... and your value!!! Weak men resent a strong woman... if he isn’t willing to step up and be the man you need... you’re better off alone!!! Don’t settle...

  • @beautifulbutterfly2474
    @beautifulbutterfly2474 3 года назад +11

    This has brought tears to my eyes... Thank youuuuuu so much for this sound wisdom and advice. I can’t wait for the zoom meeting!

  • @girlwakeuppodcast4622
    @girlwakeuppodcast4622 3 года назад +13

    Lord this was a MESSAGE! My Daughter's 12 years old, never been introduced to a Man.

  • @breewelch5982
    @breewelch5982 3 года назад +16

    “He shot me 9 times! Should I leave him?!” Wow!
    🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️

  • @beauphomasterpiece3795
    @beauphomasterpiece3795 3 года назад +14

    This was one of the best single mother talks so far . By the way … I sent my BD your “the father you can be “ he cursed me out . Lol tickled me that he would be mad . Lol

  • @antoniaadams2084
    @antoniaadams2084 3 года назад +25

    Ladies you can date without bringing the children to your home or around your children until your certain. How ever long that maybe. There are lots of great step fathers out there. If you choose to wait until your children are grown thats your choice, but ask yourself is that out of fear, if so thats not from God. Use your boundaries.
    Women dont love harder, they are taught to put themselves last more. That they must tolerate more, thats nothing to do with love.

    • @munix9351
      @munix9351 3 года назад

      🙄🙄

    • @lauracortiva
      @lauracortiva 2 года назад +2

      Agreed! When he is talking about women desperate for love while in a trauma bond, he is actually talking about codependency.
      This is not love. You cannot truly love another until you love yourself. These are the lessons I learned going through my divorce. I am stronger and wiser now than ever and so lucky to have an angel. 👼

  • @betsyq7336
    @betsyq7336 3 года назад +35

    Standing ovation for this video! Tony, I felt the Holy Spirit speaking through you. God bless you. These generational curses need to stop.

  • @melanatedempath3476
    @melanatedempath3476 3 года назад +67

    Not gone lie being single gets lonely sometimes but this is the main reason I'm still single since my divorce bc I don't trust men around my 2 kids. A lot of men seek out single moms because they got their perverted eyes on the children!

  • @taneshanash90
    @taneshanash90 3 года назад +9

    Thank you Tony…we needed this truth and tough love. Please follow through with the Zoom for single moms…..

  • @joellexaverie9703
    @joellexaverie9703 3 года назад +7

    By the time I turned 12, I always refused to sit on my father's laps. It did not matter what he said and he always thought there was something wrong with me. I tell the same thing to my daughter and I do not leave her alone with any man including her uncles! You are sooooo right. People are wicked and unless man's mind is renewed by the holy spirit , there is no way he won't seize an opportunity to satisfy himself!

    • @amazinggrace313
      @amazinggrace313 3 года назад

      It disgust me how much men are obsessed with satisfying themselves....

  • @ThisWorldIsCrazy629
    @ThisWorldIsCrazy629 Год назад +5

    This video brought me to tears - I didn’t grow up with my Dad and I’ve been desperately searching for a good man but it’s not worth putting my own kids at risk because of my desperation. Thank you for saying and even yelling at single moms to wake up! This world is scarier than I ever imagined and every video I watch keeps opening my eyes. If God give me life to watch my little one grow up, I plan to have her watch all of Tony’s videos so she will be as prepared for the ugly truth of mankind.

  • @rominaruiz207
    @rominaruiz207 10 месяцев назад +2

    Thank you for this video, I am crying cause of your beautiful message and for caring for us women with kids that need direction. I grew up without my dad cause he passed away, my mom decided to NOT get married to protect me from any abuse, now that i think about it she sacrificed her love life for me and my well being. Now i have a 10 month kid and i am no loger with the babydaddy and i needed to hear this message for sure, so much wisdom THANK YOU!

  • @kailastopa5971
    @kailastopa5971 3 года назад +14

    My only issue with another woman being in close quarters with my son is the simple fact, that my child drives me nuts and frustrates me sometimes to the point I don't know what to do (we all have had these moments with our children and know what I'm talking about and we all figure out a healthy way hopefully to handle theses moments). So if I feel some of those highly frustrating feelings and I love him with all of my heart, imagine someone who isn't his mother, who carried him in her stomach, birthed him, and feels he is a part of her how she may react or neglect in some way? They may not have a lot or any experience with kids. They may not be a mother themselves or may have somewhat of an issue with myself being that he is my child. Some woman won't like the kids mother for the simple fact they have a child with the man they think they are falling in love with or are in love with? Not to mention the child takes away from them time .Actually it's not just woman it's other people outside of us his two parents that are hard to trust! I have always told my child's father no one will ever love our son like we do so we have to protect him first and foremost. I also asked that our son isn't left alone with anyone outside of our family until he can talk so atleast then he could come home and tell us if something isn't quite right in any way with anyone!
    Sorry if grammar and punctuation is off I wrote this in kind of a hurry.
    Tony God bless you are awesome I also am emotionally intelligent so I identified with you from video 1!

    • @LarennPBel
      @LarennPBel 2 года назад +1

      U wrote it perfectly 👍🏾👍🏾

  • @kandid.konversation9482
    @kandid.konversation9482 3 года назад +230

    I pray that women become better decision makers, more emotional intelligence, and self love. 🙏🤎

    • @antoniaadams2084
      @antoniaadams2084 3 года назад +12

      The only option is to have no kids. I know several married women who's husband showed hes colours while pregnant. Its not about choices, it's about a certain type of man that exsists. So if you will never know until its too late, just don't have kids. According to this video, you have to protect your kids and that means not living your life.

    • @thelmathomas8414
      @thelmathomas8414 3 года назад +10

      @@antoniaadams2084 Exactly!!! I think its pure ignorance to think a single mother lacks emotional intelligence

    • @LovelyLenish
      @LovelyLenish 3 года назад +1

      Yes ma'am, healing is needed for sure

    • @444LAAH
      @444LAAH 3 года назад +1

      @@antoniaadams2084 facts! The compromise is Bigger. It's almost Luke the repayment of the soon yet still blessed because the lessons

    • @queenofhearts1138
      @queenofhearts1138 3 года назад +1

      Thank you for sharing this. I am a single mom I have been single totally for 7 years. I know God is protecting us I have to be grateful. These men.... As soon as you turn your back they are on the PROWL. They are baiting. They are manipulating. And they are SKILLED at gaining the trust of children.

  • @miamigirlnini2806
    @miamigirlnini2806 3 года назад +13

    You definitely the right person for this & sarcastic and funny as heckkkkkk with it 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @ericajohnson2149
    @ericajohnson2149 3 года назад +8

    This message is hitting home. As a single mom I have made the same poor decisions over and over again. My kids are a blessing and a lesson. I am single and focused on my kids. When God knows I am ready I will be blessed with a good God fearing/ loving man. Thank you for your message Tony. This message hurt but I accept it. Single moms please listen and take heed even if the truth hurts. I love all my single moms. Please keep being great moms and know God will send you a good man when it is your season and you have learned what you need to know to have a loving and awesome relationship with the man that is right for you and your family.

  • @jobossbaby369
    @jobossbaby369 3 года назад +16

    Divorce after 7yrs with a 4 yr old… I’m sitting still.. 💆🏽‍♀️

    • @gsgsgshsb3793
      @gsgsgshsb3793 3 года назад +3

      Keep your head up you’ll find someone

    • @kristenivory628
      @kristenivory628 3 года назад +3

      Thanks for putting your child first it’s hard but you can do it. My son is 16 his father deported 10 years ago.

  • @millicentstollenwerck5239
    @millicentstollenwerck5239 3 года назад +17

    I salute the beautiful strong single mothers. Although, I don't have kids but I do love babies. I almost worship them. As for dating, its not much I'm putting up with from a man. Especially not foolishness. Been through too much to except less.

  • @her.saving
    @her.saving 3 года назад +12

    single mom here and raising my daughter until my season is ready

  • @toyabell
    @toyabell 3 года назад +15

    That’s why I’m not dating because men don’t want to deal with the bs .I had to educate my self a lot

  • @trishlee7214
    @trishlee7214 3 года назад +8

    I loved this ... made me cry 😢.... I've been single by choice since I was pregnant with my daughter and she's 5 now ... I will not entertain a man unless God makes it clear that he's the one for me !!! Because all that you said is true , it's scary out here and as much as I want to be married one day, I will never want to jeopardize the life and innocence of my child !!! Period

  • @SignedBlake
    @SignedBlake 3 года назад +9

    I’m in agreement with this. When I left my child’s father, I didn’t know I was already pregnant.
    My personality has always been, I want what I want when I want it; my determination is UnMatched - blessing and a curse. I believed to want him at the time. I ignored the signs initially and eventually they became blatant and the situation dangerous. I do not have Daddy Issues; I’m a daddy’s girl and have a WONDERFUL relationship with him. Because of that, I already had the understanding, validation and expectation of how a man is to treat me - he was well under the bar.
    The night I decided to LEAVE I KNEW, what I had done. I did not know I was pregnant, but I knew that Same determination that got me in the situation was the reason I was experiencing the consequences that made me leave. I almost decided to not have my child bc of how DONE I was, but I didn’t want to have to Wonder if this was the daughter I had Always prayed for since a child, and she was❤️
    The relationship and soul tie is severed and although he is rarely involved, I do not speak ill of my child’s father. He very much understands his place. Does he like it? No. But that is not my issue. Not the ideal situation and perhaps one day it will be. But as of now, it is what it is and I ensure she has what she needs.
    My priority is my child and Our PEACE. No man has met my child except my IMMEDIATE family. I do not play. And until I see what I need to see within a committed relationship, she will not meet another man 🤷🏽‍♀️

    • @LarennPBel
      @LarennPBel 2 года назад +2

      Me and you both🙌🏾🙌🏾

  • @myishaj7436
    @myishaj7436 3 года назад +10

    Staying focused on the primary need for safety and security is paramount ladies, with and without kids. This is indeed a non negotiable when you are a sole parent in the household. Step dads are rare these days. Vet them well..and continuously. Rely on the covering of family and always pray for discernment and a healthy partner.

  • @finam9155
    @finam9155 Год назад +3

    Children are a blessing from God. Thank the lord you have and can have one

  • @shaylalasalle4817
    @shaylalasalle4817 2 года назад +2

    This is the most POWERFUL MESSAGE IVE EVER HEARD!!!!!!! I’m in tears and I haven’t even had this experience. PROTECTIVE CUSTODY, amen. I feel like going back to church!!!

  • @zahraawolowo6506
    @zahraawolowo6506 3 года назад +13

    Kudos to the single moms that didn’t give up on raising the kids despite the “decision” made by the man to leave !!

    • @indigobricks7442
      @indigobricks7442 3 года назад +2

      They shouldn’t have been spreading their legs for a man who didn’t care and honor them enough to make them an official life partner. Treating motherhood like an experiment with a non-husband is one if the dumbest, most harmful things a woman can do to herself and her child. In the 20th century, after decades of cautionary tales, there is absolutely no reason why women should be getting knocked up by non-life partners. It is beyond stupid and foolish.

    • @zahraawolowo6506
      @zahraawolowo6506 3 года назад +4

      @@indigobricks7442 Sorry I really didn’t read all of your message and it’s entirety but I am praising the women that have stepped up and held themselves accountable by raising their child despite the decision made by the other parent to not be involved !!!

    • @fromkimwithlove
      @fromkimwithlove 2 года назад

      @@indigobricks7442 silly you! you must've not read all 9f the comments! Some of these women are ex WIVES!!!

  • @FeelingFitFabFun
    @FeelingFitFabFun 9 месяцев назад +1

    This touched me and brought tears to my eyes in 2023. I’m ready to listen to God on this matter and embrace this season focusing on God and my children as a single mother.

  • @DD-mg2se
    @DD-mg2se 3 года назад +9

    I appreciate your work on all your platforms..the hardest part is the IG Q&As. Honestly, I felt sick. All sorts of emotions at once. My stomach hurt me last night. I got a headache with all the LDRs .I'm so glad you're here helping us. May the good Lord keep strengthening you. Be blessed.

  • @elizabethschilling7178
    @elizabethschilling7178 3 года назад +6

    Preach Tony!! Let the truth be told, I thank God all my children are adults with families of their own, but I did wait till my children were old enough to be able to tell me if they were being touched or abused, then I dated. Praying for single mothers. 🙏🙏🙏

  • @fabiennepdt4898
    @fabiennepdt4898 3 года назад +12

    Tony you are right. My grandmother told my mum, on the eve of my parent's wedding, not to marry my dad. But my mum was so desperate to get married, that she ignored my grandmother's advice. She has compromised for so long, she gave my dad 17 years of her life. She's still broken after all these years. My dad is a narcissistic person. My mum put up with physical, emotional, verbal and financial abuse. She thought that she could lead as my dad was clearly unable and unwilling to do so. But that was not her duty. They were unequally yoked. My mum was ambitious and hard working, unlike my dad. She filed for divorce and ended up raising my sisters and I alone. My dad is still bitter because my mum dumped him. He's the epitome of what a grown boy is at 76. He hasn't changed and admitted his wrong doings. So sad!

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +5

      See this is why I don't envy anyone's relationship or marriage. You never know what folks are actually going through.

    • @PeaceBeStill-
      @PeaceBeStill- 3 года назад +1

      @V A Don't believe it hun... People pick and choose what they want broadcasted on social media. I personally know two women that continuously post *fake* happy couples photos, while they endure domestic violence from their man SMH. They never post those black eyes or heated arguments though 🤷🏾 Social media is just a bunch of smoke and mirrors. Don't believe the hype! ✌🏾

  • @mika2707
    @mika2707 3 года назад +7

    This is true. A perpetrator will tell the child “no one will believe you” because he knows he has the mother brainwashed.

  • @uniquelondon1220
    @uniquelondon1220 3 года назад +28

    These stories are heart breaking. So many don't know what love really is.

  • @jayysclan3952
    @jayysclan3952 3 года назад +3

    This video broke my heart in pieces. I appreciate your truth and delivery. I thank God for using you to speak to us Queens. I appreciate the truth. God bless you and your family. I wish more black men had the mind Frame you have. Love, light and peace♥️💎🙏🏽