3 weird laws you break everyday

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  • Опубликовано: 8 янв 2021
  • guess we're all criminals then
    If you liked this, check out my main channel @MrBallen for longer content!
    #shorts

Комментарии • 15 тыс.

  • @normiewhodrawsonpaper4580
    @normiewhodrawsonpaper4580 3 года назад +3656

    “Yo man you got the good stuff?”
    *pulls out 76 salamanders, keys to a cheese factory, and seaweed from new hampshire.*

    • @firedup692
      @firedup692 3 года назад +126

      That guy is looking at consecutive life sentences.

    • @mrwall5271
      @mrwall5271 3 года назад +79

      What a monster, nobody can stop this man

    • @richardthomas1369
      @richardthomas1369 3 года назад +13

      Lol

    • @Rosie-id7vs
      @Rosie-id7vs 3 года назад +10

      Creepvine*

    • @erichayes6045
      @erichayes6045 3 года назад +11

      New Hampshire aka the state with the shortest coast line

  • @IAmSelym
    @IAmSelym 3 года назад +4597

    The way he says “You Fool” feels like a personal attack.

    • @maddiehagen5573
      @maddiehagen5573 3 года назад +27

      +1 kill +15 points for a feelings shot

    • @flashzoomz2531
      @flashzoomz2531 3 года назад +16

      Him:you fool
      Us:and we took that personally

    • @nicholasmcclure2890
      @nicholasmcclure2890 3 года назад +4

      Congratulations selym, you figured out his darkest secret.. it was always personal. You must be punished for this

    • @soumilimukhopadhyay4687
      @soumilimukhopadhyay4687 3 года назад +1

      Yes I don't know why he said that

    • @PynkNoir
      @PynkNoir 3 года назад +3

      it’s kinda hot 🙈

  • @Autistic_Cl0wn
    @Autistic_Cl0wn 2 года назад +257

    I always love his “Oh ho…You fool.” Quotes in this series.

  • @johnriehl3200
    @johnriehl3200 2 года назад +146

    "What are you in for?"
    "I killed a couple and their kids with a chainsaw, you?"
    "I took a 5 min nap in a cheese factory."
    "(Horrified gasp)"

    • @qxs1m
      @qxs1m 9 месяцев назад +5

      💀

  • @buckethead9276
    @buckethead9276 2 года назад +4162

    "What were his charges."
    "HE WAS COLLECTING SEAWEED AT NIGHT."
    "The filthy monster."

    • @scottia4659
      @scottia4659 2 года назад +18

      My man it’s gonna look like weed at night 😂

    • @Will0wslife
      @Will0wslife 2 года назад +9

      Lol I feel bad for the people that have gone to Jain for that lol, I live in New Hampshire and I have done the last one lol

    • @notsureiL
      @notsureiL 2 года назад +2

      @@Will0wslife Dude, what do you do with seaweed? I'm uneducated.

    • @themadfootballfan1816
      @themadfootballfan1816 2 года назад +12

      Prisoner 1: I robbed a convenience store and shot 3 cops:
      Prisoner 2: that’s nothing, I’ll collected seaweed in New Hampshire:
      Damn that’s a filthy crime

    • @rat_junk
      @rat_junk 2 года назад +1

      It’s “filthy animal”

  • @noah321
    @noah321 3 года назад +5514

    “What are you in for?”
    “I killed 3 people, what about you?”
    “I… took a nap.. *in a cheese factory”*

    • @raywind3046
      @raywind3046 3 года назад +258

      The other inmates ' Ssssss, Yeah you can't do that bud. '

    • @sonictheporcipine
      @sonictheporcipine 3 года назад +163

      Sits on the far side away from your crazy ass.

    • @rajsalekar956
      @rajsalekar956 3 года назад +73

      Hmmhmm, You fool!

    • @LocalInsaneScientist
      @LocalInsaneScientist 3 года назад +82

      I bought 76 salamanders

    • @DavidThomas-qq4hf
      @DavidThomas-qq4hf 3 года назад +20

      Was gona hit like but u r at 187-murder death kill code lol
      Nevermind someone just made it 188 so here ya go👍 but Mr. Ballen probably wants us to strangle the button

  • @randomhooman42
    @randomhooman42 2 года назад +79

    "Hey, what are you in for?"
    "Oh, I'm a serial killer that murdered 11 people, what about you?"
    "I collected seaweed at night"
    **le gasp**

    • @helenaroberts1212
      @helenaroberts1212 Год назад

      "In New Hampshire😪n my defense I thought we crossed the state line a few miles

  • @Bdub1112
    @Bdub1112 2 года назад +20

    "You fool" gets me everytime 🤣

  • @guitarguy1916
    @guitarguy1916 3 года назад +7021

    The “You fool”😂

    • @mariewiseman2962
      @mariewiseman2962 3 года назад +19

      Who you calling fool! ♥️

    • @tcalvibe25
      @tcalvibe25 3 года назад +9

      It's EVERYTHING

    • @srpdesigns
      @srpdesigns 3 года назад +25

      @sosaboy sosa Should of skipped it.... You fool.... Sorry man had to say it..😂🤣

    • @Anonymous_Guest
      @Anonymous_Guest 3 года назад +4

      It’s like Gilbert Gottfried on Hollywood Squares

    • @cross-1
      @cross-1 3 года назад +7

      The delivery was perfect😂

  • @CommunistFBI
    @CommunistFBI 2 года назад +5022

    "What are you in for?"
    "I murdered a family in cold blood, How about you?"
    "I slept in a cheese factory"

    • @DaDumbOne
      @DaDumbOne 2 года назад +79

      I never been in a cheese factory or ever heard of one in South Dakota

    • @johnadler6987
      @johnadler6987 2 года назад +82

      @@DaDumbOne Then that just makes that law even more pointless lmao.

    • @blakedavis2447
      @blakedavis2447 2 года назад +99

      Murderer: you sick fuck get away from me

    • @dragon_heart_born98
      @dragon_heart_born98 2 года назад +63

      @@blakedavis2447 The murderer then slides away and backs into the corner, fear etched into every crease of their face.

    • @cartiermadepryce
      @cartiermadepryce 2 года назад +10

      YOU MONSTER

  • @CoffeeBeanWitch
    @CoffeeBeanWitch 2 года назад +8

    When I hear Mr. Ballen laugh and say "you fool..." I know I've slipped up😧

  • @TheeRebeccaDeen
    @TheeRebeccaDeen 2 года назад +14

    "You fool" is my new comeback insult. Just that. Then I walk away.

  • @joniboii1468
    @joniboii1468 3 года назад +3655

    Imagine just having your average slumber party in a cheese factory with the boys and the you wake up to “you fool” **evil laughs**

    • @lj5332
      @lj5332 3 года назад +26

      💀 that would be me, my brother and his friend for sure.

    • @liamari9144
      @liamari9144 3 года назад +18

      *ya know, the average cheese factory slumber party*

    • @sendhelpplease420
      @sendhelpplease420 3 года назад +3

      I’ve broke none of these laws y o u f o o l

    • @mohamedbounezra3528
      @mohamedbounezra3528 3 года назад +2

      Haha ,you fool

    • @bengrimm40100
      @bengrimm40100 3 года назад

      🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @amberly0317
    @amberly0317 2 года назад +4

    Ugh his laugh and “you fool” 😂😂 gets me every time!! Lol

  • @sarahhollier6787
    @sarahhollier6787 2 года назад +14

    “You fool”
    Love it made me laugh and I’m only on my first cup of coffee this morning 😂

  • @caiaa
    @caiaa 3 года назад +2905

    “You can’t collect seaweed at night in New Hampshire”
    *well there goes my nightly plans.*

    • @irina_divine
      @irina_divine 3 года назад +48

      haha i was suprised he even mentioned a state that doesn't exist, and I happen to be in that nonexistant state to

    • @Jin-zj5yq
      @Jin-zj5yq 3 года назад +2

      @@irina_divine haha I don’t know if ur being sarcastic bc New Hampshire does exist.

    • @koureywheeler
      @koureywheeler 3 года назад +4

      Haha that makes two of us

    • @LambdaMiscellaneous
      @LambdaMiscellaneous 3 года назад +13

      @@Jin-zj5yq whoosh

    • @aad3314
      @aad3314 3 года назад +11

      @@Jin-zj5yq What’s New Hampshire?
      Edit: nvm I remember it’s that place that doesn’t exist

  • @fatheadedjordan
    @fatheadedjordan 3 года назад +2301

    “3 laws you break everyday”
    Officer: Sir. It’s the 5th time this week! How do you keep getting all of these salamanders?

    • @javiarcamaro7178
      @javiarcamaro7178 3 года назад +112

      I ain't no snitch, my Sal dealer don't exists, you be trippin, and clearly there are only 75 here this time
      *Quietly keeping the Sal from wiggling out from being stashed*

    • @fatheadedjordan
      @fatheadedjordan 3 года назад +16

      @@javiarcamaro7178 lmao

    • @thetiredkidp8746
      @thetiredkidp8746 3 года назад +20

      *I ain’t no snitch, but there was this guy in the back of a McDonald’s who got a whole farm of there bad boy, dumba$$ trade it for some freechavacodo. *luaghs on the inside in absolute lying**

    • @Toyota-li3kf
      @Toyota-li3kf 2 года назад +12

      Homie got 380 salamanders my man is on a watch list

    • @yourlocalmethaddict
      @yourlocalmethaddict 2 года назад +10

      New scp idea a wood crate that randomly opens and shoots an unstoppable laser like stream of salamanders 100 feet up into the air
      Edit: I realize the similarities between this and the" there be dragon's" scp

  • @katherinesulman2303
    @katherinesulman2303 2 года назад +5

    I love how we break these laws everyday lmao

  • @goatandyourmom9690
    @goatandyourmom9690 2 года назад +2

    Every time I watch a Mr. Ballen video and he doesn't say "you fool" at least once it makes me feel cheated. 60 % of the time it cracks me up every time.

  • @dart3471
    @dart3471 3 года назад +2007

    “i killed a man, what’re you in for?”
    “i took a nap in the cheese factory”
    *gasps*

    • @Heiress2543
      @Heiress2543 3 года назад +3

      Lmao

    • @WilliamMckenzie-fg8qt
      @WilliamMckenzie-fg8qt 3 года назад +36

      You monster how dare you sleep in a cheese factory

    • @destroyer5689
      @destroyer5689 3 года назад +12

      @@WilliamMckenzie-fg8qt becomes top in the food chain just for sleeping in a cheese factory

    • @jsgwam
      @jsgwam 2 года назад +5

      @@destroyer5689 He has no fear. No weaknesses.

    • @ChocoLocoli
      @ChocoLocoli 2 года назад

      UH OH

  • @sightrunnerafton834
    @sightrunnerafton834 2 года назад +1923

    “What are you in for?”
    “I killed a man with a refrigerator, how bout you?”
    “I collected seaweed at night in New Hampshire”

    • @Liquefaction
      @Liquefaction 2 года назад +80

      "You fool."

    • @cubesquared7808
      @cubesquared7808 2 года назад +10

      I’m getting strong Sam O’Nella vibes from this comment…

    • @dcgreatman
      @dcgreatman 2 года назад +12

      *slowly backs away* and I thought *I* was dangerous

    • @ameliem772
      @ameliem772 2 года назад +1

      U copied this comment you fool

    • @okiewoods9837
      @okiewoods9837 2 года назад

      @@dcgreatman same

  • @DCweldingAndArt
    @DCweldingAndArt 2 года назад +6

    "Sounds pretty good! I can get alot done with 76 salamanders."
    I am genuinely curious as to what you will get done with those 76 salamanders 😀

    • @drakenaas3218
      @drakenaas3218 2 года назад +1

      Start a pest control business obviously

    • @DCweldingAndArt
      @DCweldingAndArt 2 года назад

      @@drakenaas3218 oh yes, obviously 😀 to hell with the Orkin man, im calling the man with the 76 salamanders to solve my pest issues.

  • @richieward9130
    @richieward9130 2 года назад

    Please do more weird law shorts!! Your delivery is spot on dude! Loving the comedic side of Mr.Ballen! 💚

  • @hesgotahelmet541
    @hesgotahelmet541 3 года назад +2947

    The dissatisfaction and disappointment in his voice makes me feel like I'm gonna go to death row with the date of next Tuesday for sleeping in a cheese factory, taking seaweed, and buying 76 salamanders.

    • @sneakyfreak9262
      @sneakyfreak9262 3 года назад +7

      Hold up 🤔

    • @jojo-uw8tx
      @jojo-uw8tx 3 года назад +42

      Drug dealers are your problem? Pfft pathetic. We’ve got salamander dealers

    • @kellymcnary6508
      @kellymcnary6508 3 года назад +1

      Toofunny

    • @sltrskid
      @sltrskid 3 года назад +1

      taking seaweed at night in new hampshire

    • @00imz
      @00imz 3 года назад +2

      @@jojo-uw8tx LMFAO

  • @thexxredxpickle
    @thexxredxpickle 3 года назад +1992

    Inmate: We got murdering Mike, stealing Steve, and Jim.
    Me: what did jim do?
    Inmate: he bought 76 salamanders.

  • @pyromaniacpersonified3448
    @pyromaniacpersonified3448 2 года назад +1

    *chuckles slyly* “You fool… it’s illegal to nap in cheese factories in South Dakota.” Cracked me up for hours

  • @Maiq_The_Liar2
    @Maiq_The_Liar2 3 года назад +848

    Ah yes my daily routine
    -buy 76 salamanders
    -nap in cheese factory
    -collect seaweed

    • @torch14000
      @torch14000 3 года назад +28

      let's be honest, we always do the 3rd one

    • @adamelshayeb
      @adamelshayeb 3 года назад +47

      I have the authorities on the phone right now, you’re gonna regret this

    • @coltongropp1465
      @coltongropp1465 3 года назад +2

      @@torch14000 I've never even seen a sea weed...

    • @unbreakablecereal1459
      @unbreakablecereal1459 3 года назад +6

      You fool

    • @torch14000
      @torch14000 3 года назад

      @@coltongropp1465 what part of state are you in?

  • @420gabbs
    @420gabbs 3 года назад +1240

    “I can get a lot done with 76 salamanders”
    “You fool, 75 is the limit “
    The fact that these are actual laws, kill me 🤣🤣

    • @420gabbs
      @420gabbs 3 года назад +1

      Someone always ruins the fun.

    • @harshal9618
      @harshal9618 3 года назад +11

      they made it funnier

    • @nathankongstad3009
      @nathankongstad3009 3 года назад +6

      Well considering if you were on a road trip and did All three things you might get the death penalty. Therefore it Will litteraly kill you

    • @mannysantos1562
      @mannysantos1562 3 года назад +1

      What would one possibly do with 75 salamanders? Breed them? Eat them? Set up 75 salamander tanks?

    • @JS-go1bk
      @JS-go1bk 3 года назад +3

      @@mannysantos1562 Or maybe raise a small battalion of salamanders?

  • @NateTrix
    @NateTrix 2 года назад +1

    "You fool.." 🤣🤣 There goes my late night seaweed collecting sessions

  • @DrHexagon_
    @DrHexagon_ 2 года назад +2

    “Hmhmhmhmhm… you foool”
    Bro I’m literally crying🤣🤣🤣

  • @johnjoy5876
    @johnjoy5876 3 года назад +1732

    Guy: owns 75 salamanders
    Salamander: lays eggs
    Guy: "I never chose this life of crime"

    • @Mossymushroomfrog18
      @Mossymushroomfrog18 3 года назад +117

      Commit to a life of crime and create the Salamafia

    • @oggabooka2324
      @oggabooka2324 3 года назад +9

      Also when do you buy 75 salamanders a fukin day

    • @cececampbell2233
      @cececampbell2233 3 года назад +19

      @@oggabooka2324 when wouldn’t you buy 75 salamanders a fukin day?

    • @asm22797
      @asm22797 3 года назад +1

      🤣🤣🤣☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

    • @asm22797
      @asm22797 3 года назад +1

      @@Mossymushroomfrog18 holy crap!!! ☠️☠️☠️☠️

  • @WardenPal
    @WardenPal 3 года назад +2770

    “3 weird laws you break *everyday’”*
    *”Hey, dude. Want 76 salamanders?”*

    • @justme2296
      @justme2296 3 года назад +8

      Lmao

    • @ariesrule2001
      @ariesrule2001 3 года назад +25

      What was he referring to as salamander? Someone please excuse my ignorance and explain it to me. Im lost

    • @koi5799
      @koi5799 3 года назад +60

      @@ariesrule2001 salamanders as in the amphibian you can have up to 75 of them to keep it legal

    • @awesome_barabado
      @awesome_barabado 3 года назад +32

      *"YOU FOOL"*

    • @xljustshoot7914
      @xljustshoot7914 3 года назад +10

      that was implemented for safety of kids math problems

  • @panagiotiskasenidis5837
    @panagiotiskasenidis5837 9 месяцев назад +1

    This man really went villain mode a said "YOU FOOL" 💀💀💀💀

  • @content9548
    @content9548 2 года назад +2

    I love when he says “you fool”

  • @teclinsoro4523
    @teclinsoro4523 3 года назад +2005

    “here’s 3 weird laws you break everyday without even knowing! so you’re on a trip in illinois and the local salamander dealer comes up to you-“

    • @egodumpster
      @egodumpster 3 года назад +47

      I'm pissing 💀

    • @xethaan1987
      @xethaan1987 3 года назад +100

      Wym everyday I hit up my salamander dealer whenever I’m feeling rambunctious

    • @animallovers6266
      @animallovers6266 3 года назад +10

      Yes and then go to my local beach and collect thousands of pieces of sea weeds every day

    • @-capriixx-6742
      @-capriixx-6742 3 года назад +13

      like who doesn’t just find there local salamander dealer and starts purchasing 76 salamanders. I’m really surprised at you if you don’t 😩

    • @sweatpg3d213
      @sweatpg3d213 3 года назад +4

      You Fool

  • @oldthug7624
    @oldthug7624 3 года назад +1778

    “Most of you will be guilty of number three” ah yes I always find myself in New Hampshire collecting seaweed at nighttime

    • @goatman7362
      @goatman7362 3 года назад +17

      Also NH had the smallest existing ocean coastline. I’ve lived in NH for 17 years and I’ve been to the coastline like 5 times

    • @motorboatmygoat2211
      @motorboatmygoat2211 3 года назад +13

      @@goatman7362 and of course everyone has to go to Hampton on the day you go

    • @bokoyolo2452
      @bokoyolo2452 3 года назад +3

      Lol he only says that so u watch the full video till the end

    • @waltuhwhite5091
      @waltuhwhite5091 3 года назад

      Hmm that fool

    • @lokiiktomi9683
      @lokiiktomi9683 3 года назад +1

      @@goatman7362 I’m from above the notch... I’ve been to the nh coastline a total of 3 times in my life.

  • @pauljarrell8162
    @pauljarrell8162 2 года назад +1

    I wait patiently through every story just to hear him say “you fool “

  • @footagecatchers705
    @footagecatchers705 2 года назад +1

    Every time he says you fool I crack up 💀😂

  • @ieatpineapples9742
    @ieatpineapples9742 2 года назад +2984

    “what are you in for?”
    “I brutality killed a man with an axe, how about you?”
    “I bought 76 salamanders instead of 75”
    “*gasp* no u didn’t”

    • @edwardelric32
      @edwardelric32 2 года назад +37

      Underrated comment

    • @smilesssssssss
      @smilesssssssss 2 года назад +23

      Very funny underrated comment

    • @danielkarrels3347
      @danielkarrels3347 2 года назад +16

      Extremely hilarious funny underrated comment

    • @certified_geek7536
      @certified_geek7536 2 года назад +13

      Without a doubt, quite a humorous comment that happens to be underrated

    • @progdruler7911
      @progdruler7911 2 года назад +5

      Probally how it would go but lol

  • @Codyiguess
    @Codyiguess 3 года назад +919

    That evil laugh with the "you fool" is better than any anime antagonist.

    • @kman0201
      @kman0201 3 года назад +4

      I HAVE 70 ALTERNATIVE ACCOUNTS

    • @rileigh289
      @rileigh289 3 года назад +3

      @@kman0201 it’s much better to say it in an accusatory, technoblade-esque voice

    • @patnos498
      @patnos498 3 года назад

      Ikr lol

    • @stbbrn
      @stbbrn 3 года назад

      Not true

    • @otakuakshat1710
      @otakuakshat1710 3 года назад

      Na anime one is better

  • @hiimben2829
    @hiimben2829 2 года назад +1

    “I napped in a cheese factory”
    “WOAH MAN THATS WAYYY TO FAR”

  • @apieceoffabric294
    @apieceoffabric294 2 года назад +1

    The sheer intimidation in his voice at the end of each weird law.

  • @Matthew-lg9ex
    @Matthew-lg9ex 3 года назад +2895

    Mr. Ballen chuckling softly and shaking his head while quietly saying "You fool" is something I didn't know I needed, but I 100% did.

  • @leighaholzrichter5820
    @leighaholzrichter5820 3 года назад +2361

    “Yo what you in for”
    “Seaweed”
    “I’m sorry *what* ”
    “You heard me”

    • @dejiadeleye5697
      @dejiadeleye5697 3 года назад +112

      “You mean you were SELLING WEED right?”
      “No, Seaweed!”

    • @jenesaisquoi1049
      @jenesaisquoi1049 3 года назад +75

      @@dejiadeleye5697 "like you saw weed and bought some?"
      "NO, SEAWEED. THE STUFF THAT GROWS AT THE BOTTOM OF BODIES OF WATER."
      "👁️👄👁️"

    • @Galaxsity
      @Galaxsity 3 года назад +38

      "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR IN FOR SEAWEED?!"

    • @shelbysvalentine6990
      @shelbysvalentine6990 3 года назад +10

      I’ve never heard of anyone with the same name as me! My name is Leigha too!! It’s so weird seeing it when I didn’t write it lol.

    • @danielmanchego5363
      @danielmanchego5363 3 года назад +6

      In for the OG. ocean grown

  • @ncrtrooper0845
    @ncrtrooper0845 Год назад +1

    "Want 76 Salamanders?"
    "Uh Sure.."
    "We Got em Boys"

  • @LandonVR
    @LandonVR 2 года назад +1

    “I can get a lot done with 76 salamanders“
    -Mr. Ballen

  • @Mina-rf3nw
    @Mina-rf3nw 3 года назад +979

    Am i the only one that absolutely loves the way he chuckles and says "you fool..."
    It's just so funny to me🤣

    • @A18spar
      @A18spar 3 года назад +1

      YASSSS

    • @A18spar
      @A18spar 3 года назад +4

      THE REASON I SUBBED WAS BECAUSE OF THAT

    • @alecseekins7916
      @alecseekins7916 3 года назад +1

      haha you fool🤣 my favorite part

    • @StarryMidnight
      @StarryMidnight 3 года назад +1

      NAH ME TOOO

    • @even2evil219
      @even2evil219 3 года назад +1

      bro i feel the same way also

  • @polarjet1833
    @polarjet1833 3 года назад +3197

    5 years later:
    “What are you in for”
    “I burned 6 families alive in an apartment building”
    “I murdered 2 people”
    “I bought 76 salamanders”

    • @gracewisnosky6903
      @gracewisnosky6903 3 года назад +62

      I'm the 76th like

    • @tisvision
      @tisvision 3 года назад +90

      @@error9660 "I slept in a cheese factory"

    • @elijahthompson5520
      @elijahthompson5520 3 года назад +30

      Bro, as an Illinoisian, I didn't even fuckin know about the salamanders XD

    • @phud69
      @phud69 3 года назад +32

      @@elijahthompson5520 you should get to know your state's law better. What if you accidentally buy 76 salamanders and get arrested? How will you feel then?

    • @cautious-dolphin7768
      @cautious-dolphin7768 3 года назад +1

      Not true I live in newhamsher

  • @zde1532
    @zde1532 2 года назад +1

    Me: *tries to take a deep breath*
    MrBallen: *chuckles* you fool, you can't breathe underwater

  • @freewind5294
    @freewind5294 2 года назад

    This is my new favorite series for sure! He throws in comedy the perfect amount. When I click on a @MrBallen video or short I just naturally expect strange dark and mysterious

  • @CallmeDaddy21
    @CallmeDaddy21 3 года назад +2076

    The guy who owns 76 salamander, slept in a cheesecake factory in South Dakota and collected seaweeds at night in New Hampshire:
    "I'm an absolute criminal"

  • @510_ET
    @510_ET 3 года назад +1995

    “Yo man what are you in for”
    “I murdered 3 family’s”
    “I bout 76 salamanders”
    “Y-you madman”
    Credit to FBI

    • @FlyUpTech
      @FlyUpTech 3 года назад +11

      My friends say that I won't hit 500 subs by the end of 15th May. Let's prove them wrong

    • @steadyfang
      @steadyfang 3 года назад +20

      @Fnafronpa and The tattletail craft lol, self promoting won’t get him very far😂

    • @EverythingNoahSlays
      @EverythingNoahSlays 3 года назад +13

      It’s spelled bought, but bout. Just letting you know

    • @greyraiz1301
      @greyraiz1301 3 года назад +15

      @@FlyUpTech plut twist you have no friends

    • @blackgoku3868
      @blackgoku3868 3 года назад +4

      @@greyraiz1301 🤣🤣😭Haha that’s funny

  • @samuelzhao7925
    @samuelzhao7925 2 года назад +1

    Everyone in prison: Commited felony
    Me sitting in the corner because I slept in a chess factory:

  • @RandomJacks-Official
    @RandomJacks-Official 10 месяцев назад +1

    Ah yes I love buying 76 salamanders every day

  • @kierinmuniz
    @kierinmuniz 3 года назад +4083

    “What y’all in for?”
    “I killed 3 children”
    “I robbed a small bank”
    “I took a nap in a cheese factory in South Dakota”

    • @jellytvt5542
      @jellytvt5542 3 года назад +34

      Fr like w h y it’s annoying-

    • @boudyslim4812
      @boudyslim4812 3 года назад +8

      *stabbed*

    • @TheAntidk
      @TheAntidk 3 года назад +17

      And purple guy killed 6 children that ended up possessing robots which soon enough kill even more people...

    • @besterlatessa
      @besterlatessa 3 года назад +12

      Everyone is terrified of the sleeping cheese man

    • @koakendo
      @koakendo 3 года назад +5

      I bought 76 salamanders

  • @ImmortalLeaf
    @ImmortalLeaf 3 года назад +1996

    "3 weird laws you break everyday"
    Ah yes, I too love buying 76 salamanders and raise them, then I get tired and head to a cheese factory and take a nap there, then I wake up at 11pm to grab some seaweed and go back to a cheese factory to sleep, EVERYDAY.

    • @IceIR27
      @IceIR27 3 года назад +70

      👀 What do you mean? I do that every single day

    • @jj.styles7616
      @jj.styles7616 3 года назад +8

      😂😂

    • @TheLankieMidget
      @TheLankieMidget 3 года назад +34

      It's been a year and the cheese factory is filled to the brim with 27,740 salamanders that all live off the seaweed I collect each night 😂

    • @CosmicDragonMastsrChief
      @CosmicDragonMastsrChief 3 года назад +16

      @@itsvyo They didn’t miss the joke they made a joke with the joke

    • @jollyjungle
      @jollyjungle 3 года назад +7

      @@CosmicDragonMastsrChief ooh ooh can I double woooosh him?

  • @xirme7482
    @xirme7482 2 года назад +1

    i'm watching this while awaiting my court trial for buying 76 salamanders

  • @RobloxStoriesSuck
    @RobloxStoriesSuck Год назад +1

    I can already hear the 1st image
    "What are ya buying?"

  • @solomononwuama9567
    @solomononwuama9567 3 года назад +1631

    It a school day and you decide to take a nap
    “Mmm, you fool”
    “Your not allowed to take naps on a school day

    • @somerandomperson4143
      @somerandomperson4143 3 года назад +13

      Me uhh u can explain
      Edit: if you don’t get this -.-

    • @arafchowdhury4771
      @arafchowdhury4771 3 года назад +8

      @@somerandomperson4143 it means it’s illegal to not go to school

    • @Emppu_T.
      @Emppu_T. 3 года назад

      Nothing said about scnaps

    • @Its_Me_Romano
      @Its_Me_Romano 3 года назад +2

      My laugh will arrive in 2 business days

    • @1ztype343
      @1ztype343 3 года назад +1

      @@somerandomperson4143 don't get it

  • @jeremymaxwell8802
    @jeremymaxwell8802 2 года назад

    That smirk and "You fool" made this video totally worthwhile. 🤣😂🤣

  • @KristenDilligaf
    @KristenDilligaf 2 года назад

    Omg I love the " haha, you fool..." you're a natural story teller MrB!

  • @starfangirls
    @starfangirls 3 года назад +492

    I have never heard of anyone who's just like
    "Aw f**k yah I need 76 salamanders"

    • @blakejewell8209
      @blakejewell8209 3 года назад +10

      The law is specifically for fishing to keep people from taking too many for bait

    • @littlemrpinkness295
      @littlemrpinkness295 3 года назад +14

      "But I could get SO MUCH done with 76 salamanders."

    • @nshawndelatorre7519
      @nshawndelatorre7519 3 года назад

      Are we talking about the animal?

    • @starfangirls
      @starfangirls 3 года назад +5

      @@nshawndelatorre7519 y es

    • @wessleysnipespokemon2064
      @wessleysnipespokemon2064 3 года назад +1

      Actually I sold like 60 something salamanders to a pet shop in illinois when I was like 4 lol not exactly 76 but pretty close lol

  • @dontread9213
    @dontread9213 3 года назад +2851

    Fun fact: he could be making them up but we dont actually fact check it

    • @KlayYui
      @KlayYui 3 года назад +14

      New Hampshire is actually true

    • @fuckidk0350
      @fuckidk0350 3 года назад +12

      @ZuccTheAlienfrr??

    • @moniqtl
      @moniqtl 3 года назад +1

      Right

    • @shadowslasher5875
      @shadowslasher5875 3 года назад +3

      @Hayden Armstrong no they are real

    • @johnjohnohanasian2544
      @johnjohnohanasian2544 3 года назад +1

      The nh one is true im from nh and looked up old laws this was one

  • @King.C0
    @King.C0 2 года назад +2

    I do that “everyday” yeah I do that everyday of my life..

  • @bethanyshyannstiles6983
    @bethanyshyannstiles6983 2 года назад

    Lmao the “hmhm you fool it’s illegal” is what caught me off guard and had me dying of laughter 😂 😂 😂

  • @XD-pe1gv
    @XD-pe1gv 3 года назад +436

    His "you fool" feels like the disappointment most parents show

    • @aaazedo9460
      @aaazedo9460 3 года назад +5

      Hm hm hm hm hm ..... you fool....

    • @wilson4395
      @wilson4395 3 года назад +5

      It’s like when the anime protagonist finds something wrong with the other guys plan *pushes up glasses* “HAHAHAHAA you fool”

  • @johnrybinski6237
    @johnrybinski6237 3 года назад +2144

    'What are you in for?"
    "I fell asleep in a cheese factory in South Dakota."
    "Gets 'em every time."

    • @astroboystan
      @astroboystan 3 года назад +5

      Lmao

    • @MrFrootcakeOfficial
      @MrFrootcakeOfficial 3 года назад +24

      No, actually I collected seaweed in New Hampshire. Which might not sound that bad, but it was at night.

    • @Ok_ay706
      @Ok_ay706 3 года назад +5

      You sick man

    • @beansoup2463
      @beansoup2463 3 года назад +3

      Man it was that boring it put you to sleep

    • @worthy5548
      @worthy5548 3 года назад +2

      xD

  • @lordschild4219
    @lordschild4219 2 года назад +1

    🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣1st who needs 75 salamanders??🤣🤣🤣 and da you fool part is hilarious 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭chuckles "you fool" sounds like my uncle

  • @hellmuffin678
    @hellmuffin678 2 года назад

    I can't, Mr.Ballen. You are just to fn FUNNY!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @shmargletheone1378
    @shmargletheone1378 3 года назад +2124

    I can’t help but imagine this guy starts “dealing” salamanders, but he doesn’t even have salamanders. He just asks someone if they want to buy 76 and then heartily snickers to themselves as they goblin hop away repeating “75 is the legal amount, 75 is the legal amount!”

    • @honkdonk8745
      @honkdonk8745 3 года назад +106

      And thhe fact that he's now known as "the local salamander dealer" implying that there are more dealers of the same trade.

    • @marli1904
      @marli1904 2 года назад +21

      An undercover cop basically

    • @lsfwnggti6734
      @lsfwnggti6734 2 года назад +7

      I need this in my next campaign

    • @mrmoney8548
      @mrmoney8548 2 года назад +5

      I got 76 salamanders

    • @izzyt1626
      @izzyt1626 2 года назад +3

      I want this to happen to me for some reason 😂

  • @xanderramsdell2919
    @xanderramsdell2919 3 года назад +1824

    "That you break every day"
    Yes, I do, in fact, regularly buy over 75 salamanders at once. I have an army of salamanders that is ever growing. I can no longer live in my own house. I live on the streets, begging people for food. Not for me, but for my house full of salamanders. And when that fateful day comes that salamanders take over the world and destroy the human race, I will be safe. For I have offered the salamanders homes. I have given up my own safety to protect them. And now, while everyone else burns, they will protect me.

    • @harutokki
      @harutokki 3 года назад +92

      is everything ok at home ? 😟

    • @xanderramsdell2919
      @xanderramsdell2919 3 года назад +159

      @@harutokki yes. Because my salamanders are safe. That is the only thing that matters.

    • @TheCryptical117
      @TheCryptical117 3 года назад +82

      @@xanderramsdell2919 the salamanders speak to me. They are... pleased with your work.

    • @ahumanbiscuit2629
      @ahumanbiscuit2629 3 года назад +19

      Same bro. Except mine is dolphin skulls. They will conquer all.

    • @arakkalabu925
      @arakkalabu925 3 года назад +5

      LMAO

  • @evb.4476
    @evb.4476 2 года назад +1

    That is so weird and Silly rules! And you laugh is a little creepy. This is cool to hear about!

  • @Rabona__
    @Rabona__ 10 месяцев назад +1

    everyday??? never slept in a cheese factory 😭

  • @hejjodude
    @hejjodude 3 года назад +1205

    “I had a 12 kill spree on a Friday night, ran 5 people over driving drunk and crashed into some buildings. What about you?”
    “I took some seaweed at around eleven PM.”

    • @foredee8496
      @foredee8496 3 года назад +62

      *moves to another cell in fear*

    • @nancyfrancis6729
      @nancyfrancis6729 3 года назад +12

      “In New Hampshire”😂😂

    • @kikilovesfnaf9321
      @kikilovesfnaf9321 3 года назад +1

      @@foredee8496 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @trystynjohnson607
    @trystynjohnson607 2 года назад +1141

    "hey mom, i messed up real bad. im in jail."
    "what?! im coming! why? what did you do?"
    "i- i bought 76 salamanders. ive been doing this everyday."
    "oh honey im very disappointed"

    • @lettymoore3714
      @lettymoore3714 2 года назад +41

      Now I am concerned that my children could be criminals. Especially with napping in a cheese factory. My newborn grandson did this just the other day, he was born to be bad!

    • @orionthehunter217
      @orionthehunter217 2 года назад +21

      "I know, I have a problem... I need salamander rehab."

    • @Zeno00014
      @Zeno00014 2 года назад +4

      Yea I’m his mom is definitely white

    • @marcusmccurry1337
      @marcusmccurry1337 2 года назад

      I should of thought about it before I bought all the salamanders, Now I'm in for LIFE, I hope my lawyer can get me out of this, I should have known better, but when you love salamanders as much as I do, Your well, your going to the big house ,seriously

  • @Aye_Merchant
    @Aye_Merchant 2 года назад +1

    Imagine having a wanted poster for someone who slept in a cheese factory or collected sea weeds at night

  • @spam4239
    @spam4239 3 года назад +1635

    “What you in for?”
    “I bought 76 salamanders”
    “Oh sh$@ he has no fear”

  • @PeachyVA0006
    @PeachyVA0006 3 года назад +1462

    Him: “chuckling about facts that you’ve never heard”
    Me:”knowing my ass wont be able to go anywhere”

    • @staubigerbesen5390
      @staubigerbesen5390 3 года назад +22

      bc you are in death row for purchasing 76 salamanders

    • @birdtooth3261
      @birdtooth3261 3 года назад +5

      why tf did you put this in quotations

    • @staubigerbesen5390
      @staubigerbesen5390 3 года назад +3

      @@birdtooth3261 yeah wait wtf

    • @awe_chloe
      @awe_chloe 3 года назад +2

      I don't even live in America! So pfttt

    • @ORProductionss
      @ORProductionss 3 года назад +1

      Covid-19 is the reason for not going anywhere that much

  • @ryike7857
    @ryike7857 2 года назад

    I like this one. It's like the funny side of Mr.Ballen. I think your onto something here sir. As long as you keep using the phrase "you fool" 🤣🤣👍🏻👍🏻

  • @MusClues2011
    @MusClues2011 2 года назад

    The chuckle then, "You fool..." is taking me out 🤣🤣🤣

  • @wanderingmiqote9606
    @wanderingmiqote9606 3 года назад +812

    "3 laws you break everyday"
    Ah yes. Buying 76 salamanders, sleeping in a cheese factory and going to the national spelunky fuggin championships to pick some seaweed, *at night* , is my everyday routine how'd you know?

    • @TrebleClefDan
      @TrebleClefDan 3 года назад +27

      same cause i could totally do all that in one day easily

    • @thatmanislagoat4880
      @thatmanislagoat4880 3 года назад +11

      Cheese*

    • @trohyme
      @trohyme 3 года назад +8

      @@thatmanislagoat4880 Cheese*

    • @nickksters
      @nickksters 3 года назад +2

      🤣

    • @sierrasplace4078
      @sierrasplace4078 3 года назад +4

      Same can someone explain how they do this everyday? I would love to know

  • @pneumonianakey
    @pneumonianakey 2 года назад +1

    "What are ye buyin' stranger?"

  • @therealjoshtheo
    @therealjoshtheo 10 месяцев назад

    The evil laugh 😈 got me first then the “You fool” 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @lexo6987
    @lexo6987 3 года назад +641

    "You can't buy 76 salamanders"
    There goes my plan

    • @athleticnerd8333
      @athleticnerd8333 3 года назад +4

      It went right out the window… onto plan B, gonna go nap in a cheese factory to figure out what that plan is

    • @lexo6987
      @lexo6987 3 года назад +7

      @@athleticnerd8333 lets also pick up some seaweed on a specific time thats when they are the best i know a good beach where they have good seaweed i could cook kelp for us

    • @katie.jane.
      @katie.jane. 3 года назад

      Same

    • @thebotieffect7016
      @thebotieffect7016 3 года назад

      Come ta scotland ya can buy over 100 salamanders here

  • @majelcamarillo2348
    @majelcamarillo2348 3 года назад +1508

    “Hi stranger what are you buying”-merchant. *Buys something* merchant-“hehe thank you” In a British accent

    • @_formalfootage_
      @_formalfootage_ 3 года назад +8

      I

    • @paski0103
      @paski0103 3 года назад +3

      Can I buy 76 salamanders

    • @paski0103
      @paski0103 3 года назад +8

      @Olivia Simpson aw man well I guess two of my 76 friends have to share

    • @MyNaemSkwid
      @MyNaemSkwid 3 года назад

      I'm picking up dark souls vibes from this

    • @Shep576
      @Shep576 3 года назад +4

      Not enough cash!stranger

  • @mgfunkera
    @mgfunkera 2 года назад

    The way he said “you fool” was SOOOO Dennis Reynolds!!! 😂😂😂😂

  • @sirenarimmel6016
    @sirenarimmel6016 2 года назад

    I love the way you tell stories I just listen to you talk all day. Thank goodness you have saved me from being a fool! I love seaweed!

  • @julianolsenaatland978
    @julianolsenaatland978 2 года назад +534

    “3 wierd rules you break every day”
    Me: ah yes, I too have 76 salamanders and regularly nap at the local cheese factory.

    • @troubledsole9104
      @troubledsole9104 2 года назад +26

      Well, all of that seaweed collecting at night in NH, even with the help of 76 salamanders, can make you tired. And what better place to rest? Putting your head on a comfy cheese wheel in SD.

    • @BAFSM
      @BAFSM 2 года назад +2

      LMAO 🤣🤣🤣

    • @Magst3r1
      @Magst3r1 2 года назад +2

      Thats the joke dude

    • @bobbyhood2971
      @bobbyhood2971 2 года назад +1

      Right. Don't forget collecting seaweed at night

    • @MadioOutdoors
      @MadioOutdoors 2 года назад +1

      Lol

  • @getshwifty3101
    @getshwifty3101 3 года назад +1416

    *Falls asleep in Cheese Factory*
    *Wakes up in cell*
    Cellmate: Hey, you. You're finally awake!

    • @anonymouscyborg5610
      @anonymouscyborg5610 2 года назад +19

      Poll Twist: His cell mate was gay and was fucking him while he was sleeping

    • @odiousyelp3129
      @odiousyelp3129 2 года назад +8

      @@anonymouscyborg5610 gawd damn god😂

    • @BassuleleMusic
      @BassuleleMusic 2 года назад +19

      @@anonymouscyborg5610 there’s probably a better subreddit for you to express this kink, friend

    • @belle_pomme
      @belle_pomme 2 года назад +1

      Underrated comment 😂🤣

    • @TheDiloEmpire
      @TheDiloEmpire 2 года назад +2

      Your also on death row

  • @RedDoorBoi
    @RedDoorBoi 2 года назад +1

    Of course I buy 76 salamanders on a daily basis.

  • @williamholt1119
    @williamholt1119 2 года назад

    Dude, the “you fool”s were amazing

  • @yhisisknot
    @yhisisknot 3 года назад +1154

    a guy in an alleyway: "h-hey kid, want.." *looks around* "want 76 salamanders?"
    the kid: *yes*

    • @DrachenIord1510
      @DrachenIord1510 3 года назад +85

      The guy, who's actually an undercover cop:
      *You fool.*

    • @robertfromlegobatman272
      @robertfromlegobatman272 3 года назад +22

      As some one who housed to live in Illinois I can agree this happens every day

    • @TrevorFulk23
      @TrevorFulk23 3 года назад +1

      Sure bud

    • @jestbrandon
      @jestbrandon 3 года назад

      Why the f**k did I think he was talking about lizards...

    • @minana2785
      @minana2785 3 года назад +1

      @@DrachenIord1510 "It's illegal to sell 76 salamanders in Illinois."

  • @mybro7272
    @mybro7272 3 года назад +1207

    Me: eats cheese
    Factory: “that’s fine”
    Me: takes nap
    Factory: “ya there’s a guy asleep in my factory, please arrest him.”

  • @trollmaster695
    @trollmaster695 2 года назад

    The “fool” and evil laugh followed by totally serious face killer me.

  • @Onedayigbp
    @Onedayigbp 7 дней назад

    The start of his sentence:😆😀😃
    The end of his sentence:😈😈😈😈😈

  • @cozzii23
    @cozzii23 3 года назад +915

    “Hey stop right there”
    “What did i do”
    “It is illegal to close your eyes in a cheese factory”

    • @josephhartwell6214
      @josephhartwell6214 3 года назад +15

      I guess people that work in cheese factory's can't blink 😂😂😂😂😂

    • @O-Ophelia
      @O-Ophelia 3 года назад +23

      *YOU MUST ALWAYS BEHOLD THE CHEESE*

    • @bawtrawt377
      @bawtrawt377 2 года назад +3

      I read Chinese💀

    • @josephhartwell6214
      @josephhartwell6214 2 года назад

      @@bawtrawt377 lol

  • @Sparky..
    @Sparky.. 3 года назад +889

    Pov all you see is: "I killed a man, what are you in for?"
    "I slept in a cheese factory"

    • @GokuInfintysaiyan
      @GokuInfintysaiyan 2 года назад +18

      *GASP*

    • @Abshir1it1is
      @Abshir1it1is 2 года назад +37

      Dude, thats rough. I got caught with 76 salamanders. 🤷

    • @tvaettis0653
      @tvaettis0653 2 года назад

      tomatomato nice stolen comment

    • @GokuInfintysaiyan
      @GokuInfintysaiyan 2 года назад +3

      @@tvaettis0653
      It’s not really stolen if everyone and their mother on this comment section has thought of that joke.

    • @MilkySuit
      @MilkySuit 2 года назад

      @tomatomato at night

  • @kittykat8492
    @kittykat8492 2 года назад

    That snicker followed by " You fool" 🤣😂. 👌💞🇿🇦

  • @gerardogalindo8943
    @gerardogalindo8943 2 года назад

    I love how Mr Ballen chuckles and calls you a fool 🤣

  • @iveology_
    @iveology_ 3 года назад +2301

    "Yo 😩"
    "What's wrong?"
    "I accidentally bought 76 salamanders AGAIN for the 5th time this week!"
    "Omg no!"
    "Now the cops are after me 😭😔✋"