The only thing your kids will learn from you about marriage if you only keep the marriage together because of the children is that they should do the same thing for their children down the road. You do not want to instill that sort of behavior in your kids. You want better for them so set an example of what you want them to prefer for themselves in the future.
I live with a hoarder, my 81 year old great grandma. The smell is awful. After she passes, we're gonna have to clean it all up. I'm terrified of what we'll find in there.
Why not clean it before she passes? I have a hoarder Gma too and the family and I got together to clean her basement and house for her... idk why you'd want her last years to be in a hoard.
Deborah is one of the most intensely unlikable people to have been on Hoarders. She’s a vile, selfish person. One of the best Hoarder’s moments is Deborah’s follow up episode where she lied to the show about the new stuff she hoarded. She told them she was storing it for her sister. Her husband confronted her and told the show that she didn’t even have a sister where she then claimed her husband was lying because he was having an affair with her nonexistent sister. She’s a HORRIBLE PERSON.
Oh god not his lady agin. I remember it took me three separate tries to watch this episode till the end a few year's go. She is the textbook definition of selfish and self centered for sure.
I've watched this ENTIRE EPISODE... and this COW... had the audacity to tell one of the staffers how she never wanted BOYS!!! Her sons, who literally have no space to sleep because they're hoarded out of their own rooms... stood right next to her crying when she said that! I dont care how mentally ill someone is... you don't say that if there's ANY possibility your children will hear it... even if you're so effed in your head to think it! But who the heck would even th8nk such a thing!?!
An unfortunate amount of the hoarders in this show were just outright terrible people, their hoarding only magnified it. Among the various hoarders, there seemed to be a number of abusive parents. I think the absolute worst (in terms of abusive parents) was the old lady who hoarded food and in all seriousness, made me think of a real life Marguerite Baker from RE7. That hoarder was a genuinely evil human being; she horribly abused her daughter by slipping rotten food into her meals and making her sick. Worse she would do it unpredictably so it caused her daughter lifelong eating disorders and food issues due to the paranoia. I think Ken actually has a video about her, but I haven't seen it. I just remember watching the episode years ago and being absolutely horrified at this monster.
@@brandonwilliams4050 Not to mention all of the animal hoarding episodes. You have to be sick on another level to see animals living in filth, with their eyes bleeding shut from infection, and think "Everything is okay."
@@pensandshakersGod I can't even watch clips of the animal hoarders. I have three pups that I give my everything to, and to see other animals in such horrible situations just hurts. That one lady who had all the chickens and such in her trailer made me want to give her a good wallop.
Man, those chickens hurt me on another level. My parents run a ton of chickens and I bonded with a lot of them as a teenager. They're such wonderful animals. It was awful to see them that way.@@TinyToadSage
If you guys see this, I want to mention something that happened in this particular episode. The mom's "chronic disappointment" that is talked about is rooted in the fact that she had too many boys as children. She says she didn't want sons and she's upset that she had them. Turns out, one of her sons in listening in while she says this, and she just says "I don't want to talk to him" when they suggest she say something to console him. She's just a Karen that needs to be divorced and alone basically. 😬
It seems to me she cares nothing for other people at all. Everything is about her. I've known people who wanted different-gender kids, but they would NEVER say it around their children. Hell, I have next to no maternal instinct whatsoever, yet even I would never do that. The word narcissist is thrown around WAY too much for my liking, but in this case, it might be accurate. So yeah, I agree it's best for everyone to just get away from her.
@@honeybdews3282 Yeah, I would agree with that. I am still learning how to fully gauge vulnerable vs malignant narcissists. But yeah, she does seem paranoid with a victim mentality.
@@honeybdews3282 I personally think most hoarders are vulnerable narcissists. The walls of stuff to protect them is to protect their fragile narcissistic ego. Almost every episode of this show has all the hallmarks of a narcissist who terrorized others, built a hoard to 'protect' themselves and then used the hoard to continue to terrorize others. I'm not convinced hoarding isn't just a narcissist personality disorder symptom.
@@LadyTsuki If they are 'mememememe, no one listens to me. Woe is me!' they are a vulnerable narc. If they are 'everyone owes me this treatment, RAWR!' they are a malignant narcissist. There is overlap though, they'll chameleon to what works with a specific person. If you respond best to crocodile tears instead of threats, they'll go with tears. I personally believe most malignant narcissists will turn into vulnerable narcissists given enough time and malignant failures/ego bruises.
The $450 dress/blouse with the tags on and all the tech still in boxes made my stomach flip. They’ve got kids, just imagine how much better off their whole family would be without all that financial waste.
Or if her children had been able to access any of the tech. Imagine needing a computer for school, knowing there's one in here somewhere but just not being able to find or use it. Or just wanted to relax because living in a hoard is stressful and you can't find the brand new xbox because your mom already lost it in the depths of the piles.
True. Parents argue, they don't look like they're in love, you have to get therapy, you need to teach yourself how to love in a healthy way, and everything feels tense and awkward. It's horrible.
If you think being from a broken home is bad, being used a legal cudgel for one parent to bash the other with like a weapon is a million times worse. You no longer exist as a child but as a piece of legal cannon fodder used to drive the suffering of the other parent.
people that have to divorce are still toxic people and then on top of that they introduce a string of creeps and step parents into the mix that are even worse. my friends that complained about their parents staying together at least were not molested by a step father.
I remember seeing this episode in full before and one of the things she was 'disappointed' in was the fact most of her kids were boys. Made her son cry because she talked about how she disliked them simply for that.
I mean gender disappointment is real and a valid thing to feel. No woman should be shamed for feeling it. However, telling your children that and airing it out on national television isn't okay.
Wow… that’s fucked up. She has five kids, and at least one girl (based on the clips shown), but she’s disappointed enough at having boys for it to be so important to her? That’s crazy. My mum was 100% positive she was going to have a boy. No way she could have a girl. Not girly enough, wouldn’t be able to bond with a girl, had to have a boy. Oops, I’m a girl. And my mum is the greatest. She’s told me that when she bought clothes for me when I was little, she go into the shops and pick out whatever she wouldn’t be caught dead in and I always loved whatever she chose that way. We’re super close, despite my mum not really wanting a girl, and me being the girliest girl to ever girl while she’s always been a tomboy. I can’t imagine how hard it must be for her kids to hear that their gender was so disappointing to their mother it contributed to her hoarding problem. That’s heartbreaking.
Could she be lonely because I feel like hoarding and compulsive shopping is to temporarily help with loneliness, perhaps she had an idea in her head that she would have a female child to do girly things with and that never happened, it's sad on everyone though. Maybe she doesn't have any female friends or anything like that and she feels she is missing out 😢
All because you live with a hoarder doesn't mean you are a hoarder. You're a victim of a hoarder. I've had the situation before and you can't do anything about it unfortunately.
@@gregoloniousyou’d be fighting a losing battle mate. My mother was a hoarder and regardless however many times we cleaned out the house new stuff almost immediately took its place. It’s a never ending cycle and only way to resolve it is with intensive therapy. Just getting rid of the stuff won’t solve the problem
My dad wasn’t a hoarder but he’s a lawyer and there were soooooo many documents he wasn’t allowed to trash until a certain amount of years passed so there were 2 big closets filled to the top with boxes it was soooo annoying growing up just not having any place for storage
hey that's funny cuz today i actually did get a great top from the thrift store for $2.99 I will say though i noticed a lot of the clothing prices at my thrift has been raised slightly nowadays sadly (still good finds though)
@@fefiedmond1920 Most hoarders have so much stuff, they no longer know what they own. If an item is actually important to them, they would be able to make a list without looking. If something is so unimportant that they forgot it exists, then it can be thrown out. If they look at every item before it is sorted, they can just always say "oh this is my favourite xy" even though they haven't used it in years.
@@fefiedmond1920it means things that are so unimportant you literally dont know/remember they exist, so, as an example, if you have a desk and you can name all your supplies, but then forgot to list a stapler because it wasnt important enough for your mind to remember, you should get rid of it! :)
I come from a family of hoarders and so does my husband. We try VERY hard to keep ourselves from going down that slippery slope, but it’s hard with two small kids. Our house isn’t the cleanest, but our children have plenty of clean space to live and play. That’s the biggest accomplishment for me.
There is child clutter and that is very different from hoarding. I'm sure you are doing just fine. It's so hard with kids because people love to give them stuff and they get so attached to everything. I have one child and he has enough toys for 5 kids.
"I'm chronically disappointed." Never mind those kids that were probably too embarrassed to ever have friends come over the entire time they were growing up.
@@giselle7432And he ended up crying near her but she full on said “I don’t want to talk to him right now” after the psychiatrist lady recommended she try to console her kid. She’s awful
I can completely sympathize with the kids. My dad is exactly like this lady but we grew up, and still live in, a two bedroom apartment. I had to just help him purge some shit because the apartment failed an inspection and we were on the verge of eviction. I saw it coming. My mom and I were doing everything we could to keep the place livable, but it was tittering. The fact that we can see his floor, not just a narrow path to his bed currently is amazing. Seriously, I could trauma dump a whole novel here. Ugg.
Poor Dad, you can tell in the scene where they are talking about how they feel, and she says "I don't feel heard", and he said "WE don't feel heard" Chances are extremely high that they have listened to her time and time again
I have such a love-hate relationship with this show. Wish they started with therapy before just trying to get the horder to throw away 95% of their stuff. I get this is more of a shock factor and entertaining but it’s really not the way the psychological disorder should be addressed.
This show is messed up. They wait until someone gets a notice from their city or county saying they have to clean up or face legal consequences, and the person from the government shows up with a producer from this show. It happened to my mother-in-law who was a hoarder and was getting a huge fine for her yard. They basically told her "we will throw you in jail for 30 days, or you can be on this tv show." She screamed at them to get off her property and found a private charity to clean the yard without putting her on tv.
@pcbassoon3892 oh jeez. I was wondering how they found people for this. I was guessing their families reached out to the show. If the show made more of an attempt to address the mental health issues underneath then it would feel less Predatory, kinds like how judges choose community service over jail
I wish they made them do therapy before doing this to them. Its such a massive change and then they have to learn how to cope with it. The chances of therapy being successful at this point is so low
My grandma was a hoarder and now that she has dementia she’s in a stage of that where she wants to get rid of stuff finally. Except now it’s just about everything and stuff that maybe other family have wanted (like things from her mom), it’s been tricky to navigate. Don’t wish hoarding on anyone! Having to be the one trying to deal with a family member with it and then seeing how she struggled it’s really awful
let her put the good stuff in bags, tell her you'll get rid of it, then let the fam go through it lol. She doesn't need to know how it got taken care of.
Dementia is so hard to deal with. One day my grandma sat me down, near tears and begged me to stop wrestling gators. I'm a 4' 11" woman and live in Arizona. I promised that I would never wrestle gators ever again. I've held up that promise. Nana was funny with her dementia. My grandpa, on the other hand, gets mean. It's so different from person to person. My mom is showing signs of dementia. She's gonna be a mean one. It's going to be interesting. At least I have experience.
@@feraltaco4783 similar to mine. Gotta laugh at the crazy things their minds come up with lol mine told me so randomly after she woke up from a nap “my sister k!lls people, did you know that?” Like her sister is so sweet would never be a chance of that so when I told her sister of this new found “job” of sorts her sister claims she has, she said she only does that on thursdays 😅😂 but yeah definitely get the mood swings and oh boy, the things she can say cut like a knife but I know it’s not really her. Or try to tell myself that anyway. I’ve been her caregiver for a year now and it’s been a lot of learning and changing to match up with what stage she keeps getting to
I have hoarding tendencies as well. Clothes tend to be my weakness, and there is trash in my living area occasionally, but I’m not emotionally attached to it, it just ends up being too overwhelming to clean up. Recently, while watching all the hoarders videos you guys make, i’ve been making an effort to clean, and I’ve already donated 5 bags of clothes, and chucked all the trash! Watching you guys react to these episodes definitely puts a positive spin on it, sometimes watching hoarders alone just feels too sad, so thank you for what you guys do! ❤
I've never understood a married couple staying together to avoid 'a broken home'. Your kids will be WAY worse off if they're stuck in a home that's full of tension and resentment and fighting. It's so stupid.
I would think that if a couple had kids they should put in extra effort in saving the marriage .Once you have kids with someone you will have to deal with for the next 20 years to some degree .Add to that if either person remarries there is added issues. If the marriage has a chance work it out but if they are always fighting and hate each other it is worse for the kids than a ‘broken’ family.
@beckyshell4649 Yeah I'm not saying they should give up straight away but if they've put work in and it's no use then yeah don't make the kids have to deal with their home constantly being a battlefield
My parents never have and never will make the effort to fix things, they’d both rather just ignore the problems, keep arguing and hating each other under the same roof and torture me. All I can do is move out and let them at each other
It irritates me when parents think their kid's love is a given, an unconditinal thing and the kids can't bear the thought of being separated from one of their parents... While it's true for some children, not for all. If you're like this woman is, or other abusive parents, there's a high chance your kids are happy to see you pack your bags.
My mother in law is a hoarder. When she starts to get rid of stuff, she usually tries to give it to us. If we refuse, she'll keep it. So, I usually agree to take her stuff and throw it away or donate it after about a month. She never asks about it again because she's forgotten it.
This was one of the most manipulative perpetual victims on the show. Probably the most difficult episode to watch considering how emotionally abusive she was to her poor sons. I really hope they all got away from her.
Bought a hoarders house for pretty cheap and am in the process of remodeling it. Took about a month of fighting my way through normal work and clearing this place out to even be ready for a normal remodel process. It left me both angry and just sad, these people need some therapy
@@luna_R0s3 I got around 3 whole sets of dishes from back when brown was the cool color to have and some Tupperware from the same era, other than that a lot of moldy clothes
I didn't know buying a house with stuff still in it was a thing. I totally get why you'd feel the way you described. When you have a beautiful house soon enough, hopefully it will all have been worth it.
My mom is a low-level hoarder. So as someone who lives with one, I can tell you her being a hoarder and living in her house absolutely does not make me one. It is incredibly hard to clean up after a hoarder on your own. Not only because the messes are always beyond what one person should have the responsibility of doing, but because the areas you clean never stay clean. Your efforts feel fruitless, because even if the area stays clean for a while, eventually it goes right back to how it was.
I agree. In my case, my father is the hoarder of old electronics. My mother won't clean up after herself. I grew up in that, my brother still lives in it. My father has acknowledged (sorta) that he has an issue and is working on it, but it's still obvious. While I was there, it was difficult to try to keep up with one hoarder who cleans, and another parent who just doesn't clean anything, and my brother who also doesn't clean (he just got back from Army AIT and bootcamp, still waiting to see if that's changed). As soon as I moved out, the bathroom I used became disgusting and crowded with stuff. I am not a hoarder. Everyone teases the girls who like the beige and white aesthetic, but I realized for me, it's because it symbolizes clean and calm. It's boring, and that's fantastic for someone who grew up with hoarders.
You wrote this perfectly. Took the words out of my mouth. My mom is also a low-level hoarder. It’s not our fault or responsibility, although we still try.
Or you've emptied a room only to have it fill up with new stuff from another room. You've made a pile to make another pile to go through the third pile while the fourth moves to a new room.
Years ago, a low-level hoarder relative was paying me to help her "organize". And I really needed the money at the time, but after two or three times going over there, I had to give up on it. She wouldn't let me throw anything away, and it just felt like such a pointless waste of time. Like I was supposed to magically shrink all this crap to make it take up less space. I can't imagine having to actually live with someone like that.
As a child of a hoarder who grew up in this mess, the mental image of the son crawling out of the hoard to freedom had me cracking up 🤣 so freaking true metaphorically and literally lol
I grew up in a hoard. Now as an adult who has lived on her own for years, I’m so bad about immediately tossing anything without use and I drive myself nuts keeping my apartment ‘show home’ style. Everything in its place, everything clean. Not sure if that’s much healthier but it’s the result.
I don't know if it's healthier but at least you'll never find dead vermin or feces piled on your carpet under layers of trash. Edit: Just read this back and concluded that, of course your way is healthier!
You went to the complete other side of the spectrum. My mom did that. One example, I had the complete first print run of Pokemon cards. Including holos. The Charizard alone is worth between 50-80k. When I came back to get my stuff after boot camp, she had tossed it along with all my old school games from Atari to PS2. My final fantasy 7 was worth $700. I was fuqing PI$$ED. Just because it isn't in immediate use doesn't mean it's worthless. I had rare Nintendo games like the SNES TMNT and the first Metroid.
@@hezemoth How is that not useful? You know that's the basic premise for investments right? By your logic, the stock market is useless. Not to mention my dad was the one that got me most of that stuff. The sentimental value was massive as well.
If you look at one of the comments on the video clip, it’s mentioned that Deborah hated having boys while her sons can hear her in the other room. Guess we know where her “Chronically Disappointed” feelings come from. In the photo it looks like she has 4 boys and 1 girl.
@@kissit012 I just read an article that she says otherwise. It says she made her daughter do pageants and she’d fill the house full of frilly dresses and everything. And why she had rooms painted pink she’s obsessed.
My kid got a piece of wood from a flood stuck in their foot at the end of June. 3 heavy duty antibiotics, antiseptic soaks twice a day, and antibiotic slave twice a day. The docs treated the wound, they treated for both sewage and harmful chemical exposure. The puncture was massively infected and surrounded by red infection lines in less thay 24 hours. Flood waters are disgusting, no joke.
Unfortunately, it's not that easy. Despite hoarders' claims that they care about everything they have, they treat it like trash-throwing it in heaps like a landfill and not taking care of it. All that stuff likely REEKS of hoard. It becomes a biohazard and irresponsible to give to others. You'd have to wash all those clothes and clean all the objects before passing them along. It's too much to properly sterilize and delouse.
This mind set actually enables hoarding the idea that they'll donate it one day or sell the valuable things gives them excuses to keep it unfortunately speaking from experience
I have several relatives who have been or are in the medical field and 3 of them act like they know nothing about sanitation or keeping a house in a hygienic and healthy way. Like auntie, you're an RN, you know piles of cat poo in your house are going to cause problems with your health!! It melts my brain.
I think Matt would have exploded if he'd been there to hear her say she resented her sons for being boys. Or to hear her saying her family doesn't listen to her when she clearly is the one in charge of and ruling the home with her hoarding fists. This woman was a pathological liar and Matt wouldn't have put up with it. Wish he had been there instead of Dorothy. Some hoarders need a nicer touch, but some are bad people that just deserve to have Matt scold them.
As someone that has grew up with grandparents and parents that are hoarders, I have grown to be a huge clean freak and have to keep things organized or I lose my mind :(
Omg same, everything in my house is (has to be) minimalist, decluttered and organized. I have a routine of deep cleaning my house quarterly and anything that hasn't been moved or used in the last 3 months is donated, sold or thrown away. I was diagnosed with OCD and feel it all comes from living between filth and hoarding growing up.
My mom is a hoarder and I became a bit of a neat freak after I moved out. But after my kids and the whole nesting stage? Oh god, I become physically stressed if things are not cleaned up and put away. I seriously should probably look into getting help for it
My room got messy to the point of hoarding in 4th grade, so my dad made me watch the first episode of Hoarders. Right after it was finished I spent 3 hours cleaning my room since it dawned on me I was living in a junkyard. I couldn't imagine living in a house like this, I hope that anybody suffering with this gets the support they need.
I'm assuming she holds onto stuff, because she doesn't want to face the truth of what's going on with her marriage and family. So shopping has become an addiction to get her out and away from it all. It's like a security blanket of trash.
My grandma wasn’t necessarily a hoarder to this extreme, she grew up around art and so did my grandpa and he actually was an artist. So the house was cluttered with paintings and antiques and honestly it was like a museum and they have always fostered creativity in their household so no one really minded. You could walk and see the floor, the walls were just covered in art. When they moved into assisted living, we were cleaning out their house and came to the room behind the kitchen. We didn’t really have a name for it. It housed the laundry room and a sink and a pantry and had a door to go out back, name it what y’all want. Anyway, we’re clearing things out and my mom came across a STOCKPILE (think extreme couponing) of CANNED SALMON. No one in that household had ever ate canned salmon and my dad had no clue there was even a stockpile. There must’ve been like 100 cans and when we asked her about it, she said there was a really good sale on tuna but when she got there there wasn’t any tuna left so she bought the salmon instead thinking she would incorporate it into a dish and just never did🤣 I love my grandma and her ways and I miss her dearly, but I will always think about this story whenever anyone mentions hoarders.
17:19 I once played in a retention pond at the bottom of the hill from several houses when I was a kid. Not nearly as toxic and gross as flood water, but retention pounds are a PART of flood waters, so anyway, I played in that water 3 days in a row before an adult caught me and told me how chemical runoff and some sewage runs down into that pound. So I stopped playing in it. Several days later bumps started forming on my back, shoulder, and forearms. Went to a dermatologist and they had NO clue what was wrong with my skin as they’d need a sample of the water tested by someone else first. My parents felt that was to much trouble so they just bought me Benadryl cream from K-Mart at the time and hoped for the best. 28 years later, I’m 38 now, still to this day when I’m outside in the heat for to long the bumps come back and my skin gets super sensitive and raw feeling. So sensitive that it hurts even to blow on it. And that’s just coming into contact with retention point water, which probably only makes up 10% of what’s in flood water
Oh I get these bumps in the sun. It's because I have very sensitive skin (I'm a redhead so the sun hates me anyway and on top of sensitive skin). Basically heat rash. The chemicals probably peeled the layers of your skin in a way that left you with sensitive skin permanently. especially if you didn't prep your skin for it or care for the stripped away layers properly at the time (you wouldn't have known to so not your fault). You can get a prescription for a gentler antihistamine from your doctor for cheaper than over the counter stuff (I like montelukast/singulair but another might be better for you) and it helps control the rash when you know you'll be out in the sun or sweating a lot.
@@prettyevil6662000 maybe 10-20 years ago I would have considered it but it doesn’t really bother me now. I have more serious health stuff to worry about at the moment lol but I think your right. I mean, that makes sense.
I lived in a hoarder trap house... And let's just say it was gnarly. I was a minor at the time and had 3 younger siblings all in diapers.. the smell of that House was disgusting we also had three cats and a dog so as you can imagine trash and feces everywhere. And tons of clothes, Toys, food, and random projects never finished stacked on top of each other. I remember having cps come and take my siblings away for a week while they hired a clean up crew for the house full hazmat gear and everything, before they even came we had thrown three truck loads of trash to the dump. We also had a fly infestation and had to consistently fly bomb the house multiple times just to make it livable, I remember having a fan face me while I slept because otherwise they would land and crawl on my face....and by the time I had moved out at 16 there were rats in the walls you could hear at night and a leak from the upstairs bathroom from my dad and his gfs room had started seeping through the second story floor, through the kitchen light fixture and onto the ground.. so my parents started to just manually turn our water off. This year I'm 18 and on the 4th of July it caught on fire and burned to the ground. No one was inside (2 months prior my parents had started moving into an apartment so everyone was safe!) But god that was such a relief everything is finally gone. Edit: clarification and spelling 🖤
Sounds like the house from when I was in high school (besides the fire part. I almost wish that happened). My mom and her boyfriend just would not clean. I gave up. The house was trashed- literally. Garbage everywhere. Dishes in the sink piled up for months. Mold everywhere. And the flies. Oh the flies. That’s why I stopped washing the dishes. I had to wear a face mask and my glasses otherwise they would attack my face. I gave up and would eat out instead. After cleaning up after them for so long, I got burnt out and started doing the same to my own room. That’s when I decided it was time to leave. It took me 2 years, but I finally found a place for myself. I also decided to leave because of the rats in the walls. They chewed through the walls to the kitchen. Anything on the floor was theirs. I stayed out of the kitchen after I saw the first one. I don’t know how many of them there were either, but they were huge. Now that I’m in my own place, it’s much better. Occasionally when it starts getting messy, I think back to that house and I run around trying to clean. I can’t do that filthy, moldy, critter infested type of living ever again. I can’t comment on smell because I (thankfully) don’t have a very good one
I had an ex who was a hoarder, and who’s parents are hoarders. We didn’t work out for lots of reasons that didn’t have to do with that: but I am so glad to not have to worry about it. Hoarders need therapy for so many things. Genuinely, I hope he’s okay and is getting help because he was really struggling.
When my parents told my brother and I that they were splitting up, my younger brother flipped out. My first thought was "FINALLY!" All they ever did was argue. The divorce was hard but even as a kid I knew that it needed to happen.
20:07 Your mom hates Christmas ✅ She’s a hoarder ✅ You’re parents are fighting but they’re staying together “for you” ✅ Ngl, all of that’s the tip of the iceberg where I grew up, but it still all really sucked.
I live in a opposite situation. After my grandfather died, my grandma asked me and my husband to move in with her and if we took care of her, she'd leave us the house. She calls us hoarders because we have some stuff in an unused room were we do our hobbies. It's nothing like a actual hoarders room even if my husband's desk is a little cluttered. But you know why we have so much stuff in one room? Because it's the only room besides our bedroom we are allowed to have anything in. When we moved in she literally wanted us to throw ALL our stuff away except our clothes because "we don't need it" we just got married a year prior and all of stuff was new. We aren't allowed to decorate or hang our pictures up. If we leave anything on the kitchen table we are called hoarders. She will freak out if she thinks anyone is coming over and the house doesn't look like its ready to be a show house. She freaks out if our 1 year old brings toys in the living room. It's ridiculous.
you should do the hoarders episode where the wife was addicted to shopping at the mall and it hoarded up her whole house. Her husband's a diabetic where he could lose his foot if he were to cut it or hurt it in the hoard, or something. And she didn't care about her husband's issues at all. Hoarding is no joke.
As someone with divorced parents I can genuinely say they made the best decision possible for them and for me. They went from arguing and crying constantly to hugging and having lunch on my drop off days when they swapped me. It was the absolute best thing for me. They weren’t married and I had two homes but they were happy and got along so much better. It was a great example for me that you can love someone and care for them but be happier and more respectful to one another separately.
This brings back memories. Not good ones. For 4 years I lived in a hoarder house. My mom is obsessed with buying things- mostly furniture and art supplies at the time. And her boyfriend hated cleaning, and would often make weird concoctions in the kitchen (apparently it was food). It was my job to clean “because you’re so good at it”. So I would constantly clean as best as I could for about 2.5-3 years straight, I’d do the floors, pick up garbage, sort the laundry, do the dishes, hell, I’d even cook. At this same time, I was a full high school student and I had a job on the weekends. I still don’t know how I managed to do it for as long as I did. Eventually I got burnt out. Day in and day out of cleaning a never ending cycle of garbage and dog shit was tiring. And yes, literal dog shit. My mom didn’t let out her dogs as often as she should, but one of them had bladder issues after having puppies. But anyways, I eventually stopped cleaning everything. Then the bugs came. My mom tried to force me to clean, but the bugs would attack my face when I got near the sink or oven. I had to wear a face mask and glasses. I still couldn’t keep up. Motivation lost. Then the rats came. I officially stopped using the kitchen. The bugs and rats could have it. I ate out a bunch. I wasn’t stepping foot in that kitchen. Rats would chew through anything left on the ground. My bag of cereal we just bought the night before, some hamburger buns that didn’t get put away, the bag of dog food. They ate it all. So then I looked for 2 years for a place of my own. My bedroom was once the cleanest room in the house, became a trash heap. Then the mice came. I completely lost motivation. I heard the scratching at night. I could never find them though. I never did. But I knew they were there. I finally found a place after searching for 2 years, I moved out in 3 days. My apartment looks great. Occasionally it does get messy, but it’s a very quick fix when I start thinking about high school. I just can’t do it again. When I’m able to stay on top of it, my place is picture perfect. For the first month of moving in, I woke up with a huge smile on my face. I was constantly cleaning to make sure it stayed “perfect”. I eventually loosened up a bit
I feel you with the mice. I had to hide food in my room to keep it from getting eaten. I still eat out because I don't trust buying food and storing it.
I think her 'STUFF' defined her. I would imagine she is feeling a deep sense of loss. But... She will get over it and 100% certain she will start hoarding at lightspeed again.
"i was never skinny enough to wear their clothes" same, and was sad about it at the time. TJ Maxx is still an absolute banger. I can get my michael kors, discount slacks, AND home goods? I walk out feeling blessed LOL
8:41 Statistically speaking, kids that grow up in a family with parents who are constantly arguing do fare slightly better than kids who grew up and the parents divorced during their childhood. The sad thing is that marriage therapy should be the step before divorce, but so many people don't even try it and go straight to divorce.
To quote one of my patients who owned a company that aided in cleanups after natural disasters including hurricanes and is now in his 80’s: “Don’t these people realize they have orifices in question?!” The one person who dropped down in the flood water is genuinely concerning to me.
These hoarding stories are really sad... I heard of one where the son of a hoarder woman disappeared and they thought he ran away Only to find his body later in his room beneath all the trash. I was born and raised in a hoarder home and I can confirm the smell and mess is disgusting and humiliating, especially for non-hoarders who are stuck living with them. This is seriously dangerous and I hope they get the help they need-
@@littlemoth4956that’s basically how it happens. Hoarders pile their stuff really high. Sometimes the piles get to be too big and fall. When a pile with that much stuff falls on you, you can get stuck- mostly from the weight alone. You never know what could be in those piles. The weight plus if there’s cloth in them, it muffles your screams. Then you’re kinda just stuck there until you die or someone finds you. A really scary and sad way to go
Let me explain what chronically disappointed means. When they encounter a problem, they feel helpless or inable to change the outcome. Some of their problems depend on other people, raise for example, or some depend on luck, sudden repair jobs etc. what does this mean? They feel like they have no control over their life. And they get some comfort finding this missing control in hoarding, what they have and how they have is important. Someone going through her stuff is not a favor, it is an invasion of personal space, destruction of the remaining control. She wasnt a jerk, she was traumatised by this. Any expose should be suggested after a long consideration. This was for the entertainment value, i doubt it helped her in any long lasting way. What she needs is getting control over her life, being proactive, and the same time, getting aware of the fact that she doesnt need those stuff. But now, she feels vulnerable and attacked. You know where she will find comfort after this. She will be more protective over her stuff and interpret any kind of help offer as offensive. Good job producers, hecking A.
From someone who did grow up without Christmas, birthdays and any other “holiday” in between as well as many other “normal” things to grow up with when you can see everyone else doing it, it does start to become a very lonely and bland existence
Every time another episode of hoarders drops it makes me want to go through my entire apartment again and clean and declutter. I didn't grow up with hoarders but I moved in to a home when I was 18 and the homeowner was a hoarder so bad that it spilled out into her front yard. It is a very sad mental illness that really opened my eyes because there is nothing quite like seeing a hoard that bad in person and experiencing that.
15:12 “I can never voice my whole opinion because you shut it down all the time.” Her “opinion” is that nothing should be thrown away, and that’s the problem. She has a condition, not an opinion, and it’s ruining her health, the health of those around her, any animals they may have, and the mental wellbeing of everyone involved. Her psychologist needs to be reprimanded for trying to make this a two-sided fault scenario, because it isn’t and never has been. She’s sick, and her family is desperately trying to help her but she refuses it. That’s her problem, not theirs
The sad thing is I can relate a teensy tiny bit to this hoarder. Sudden changes like a surprise can often frustrate me at first but I'm aware its a lack of control thing. Kind of a leftover from my now very dead abusive grandma. The rest of this hoarders behavior sickened me but I still had a sort of ping of empathy at one part
I think the bird is Hollister To be fair, renovating a person's home can be pretty disastrous if you don't know their tastes... It's a little different for the houses that are basically destroyed, but hers just seemed to need some cleaning once the junk was gone
A lot of times, hoarding issues come from a place in childhood where the person has experienced a loss of something important. It can also stim from other underlying issues like ADHD, anxiety, depression and other disorders that induce a lot of stress. Sometimes it’s also it’s just plain old forgetfulness. My mom is a hoarder, and we have been slowly working on it with her for years. She’s always afraid of not having what she needs when she needs it, even though what she needs is somewhere lost in the mass of stuff. We used to have clothes piled up to the ceiling, and my dad and I had to sit her down and work on it with her for at two decades. (I’m 30.) She forgets where she put the thing she needs, and gets super overwhelmed when she has to find it. So she’d rather go out and buy it again, then spend the time looking for it. She has ADD, and she hates cleaning. She gets so overwhelmed even looking at the mess, and gets so depressed. It’s heartbreaking. Having been a child of a hoarder, I had to learn and teach myself what not to do. It’s interesting having a mom who is so afraid of letting anything go, and having a father who, though mental and physical abuse, was trained to never care about or have attachment to anything living and not.
Oof, my mom's the same; I'm 30 too My brother and I just chucked out a load of 25+ year old hair products that we've moved across the country we found in the basement. She's got a ton of "multiples" cuz she can't/won't find the original ones within the hoard She's got a billion pounds of clothes in a dozen different sizes. She got me a package of onesies a few weeks ago-- I'm not pregnant and neither of my siblings have kids It's exhausting
I use to live with a hoarder. I left because they became violent but after over 2 years I just got rid of the last of their hoard. Most of the stuff hadn’t been moved or opened since we moved to that place in 2019
From my understanding with a lot of hoarders, at least the messy kind, it really is about control. Even though it's obvious their living space is better when they have people come and help clean it, they still hate it.
8:27 staying married and fighting is much worse. my parents argued everyday when i was in elementary school and i was scared thinking one would murder the other or me and i was so happy when they got divorced when i was 9 it might have been the happiest day of my life, my mom told me and i gleefully asked if i could tell my friends. They never hit each other or anything just loudly argued every day and i just tried to avoid them
My parents (in their 70s) are hoarders of Chinese junk they buy on amazon. My dad said he was planning on tossing out old stuff. Which means he was making space for the amazon junk. So me and my siblings have slowly and quietly taking out all the sentimental and valuable things they want to toss out. Cast iron pans, corningware dishes, and crystals go to my sisters. I took the reel to reel and other cool vintage electronic things. Also got a tv from the 60s still working, and classic radio from the 40s. We couldn't save the garage kept 70s f150 as my dad junked it. We're gonna take the family photos just in case they lose their minds some day and toss that out as well. There was so much cool stuff we couldn't save but at least we got the sentimental stuff. That can't be replaced.
As an archivist, i deeply appreciate that you kept that vintage tech. They are off their rocker to get rid of that stuff to make way for chinese garbage... Always great to see someone who values traditional stuff too 0_0
She didn't say she hated Christmas said she didn't like surprises. The unexpected can harbor a lot of anxiety for them. They still do this for other people tho, it's just that they themselves don't like being given something as a surprise. Sometimes it's also just easier to shop for yourself than let others get you gifts.
My mom was/is a hoarder. Whenever I tried to throw things away somehow itd always turn up in the house. 🙄 Now I'm obsessed with having a clean house and afraid of dirt.
A few years ago my mum worked for the our council cleaning homes and two of her co-workers went to a job one day where the home owner said, in short "Ive had a shopping addiction for decades, this house is just where i store it all. Please empty it, keep what you want, sell it, chuck it out, i dont care i just need it gone" She'd married a millionaire and funded her hording/shopping problems for nearly 20 years. It was a large beachfront property (unused summer home) filled to the brim with brand-new, boxed, stuff, all expensive, from high end clothes and accessories to tech stuff and home goods...
There is a youtuber who cleans her depressed viewers houses for free if you wanted to see some extreme conditions. The RUclipsr is Auri Katerina i think? She has a strang4 european accent and happily digs into the cesspool. I highly recommend giving it a watch. ❤
There’s tons of cleaning people out there like I love watching Auri but there’s also “cleaning with Barbie” and I enjoy watching her too, she’s just more serious and focused.
What makes someone a hoarder isn’t keeping and acquiring lots of stuff….what makes them a hoarder is forming an emotional bond with literal garbage and it hurts them emotionally equal to the death of a close friend to throw something away.
I see the house transformation as an opportunity. If she liked to see pink walls, and now they're blue, well now she can access them to paint them pink again. She wasn't seeing pink walls before because of the damage from her own hoarding.
As someone who grew up in a hoarder house. I basically was just as messy as my mom when I lived there. You kind of sit in a situation where you give up. You get beaten down over and over. Oh, I'm going to do laundry turns into oh, there is no way to get to the laundry room or the washer is broken so now I have to go to the laundromat but only when my mom has the energy to do so. I bought a lot of things too just to feel good because the rest of the house was a disaster. My dad basically has just accepted being in a trashy house and my mom blames him for not helping enough. When I moved out, I got panic attacks over fruit flies. I hyper-cleaned so aggressively that I caused injury to myself (slipped a disc). I've learned a happy medium at this point with therapy. And I refuse to go back in their house, especially overnight, because the last time I had a panic attack and an allergic reaction to something. Plus, I fell down the damn stairs because it was covered in random clothes. But sometimes, my poor boyfriend gets to watch me purge everything I see that I can't find an immediate use for. It's hard.
the house i grew up in as a kid wasn’t nearly this bad, but there were still lots of items strewn around the living room floor. it sucked most of the time but it was the perfect setup for playing the floor is lava
Trying to move into a new apartment and realizing how many boxes worth of junk I have has made me feel more like a hoarder than I ever have 😂 this episode made me feel a lot better about my 15 tubs lol
I’ve been watching Ken and Buff for quite awhile now. And I’ve been waiting for the day Ken releases a video that lands on the same day as my birthday. Today is that day. I turn 21 today and I am so thankful for all the great work you guys put out. Hope you all have a blessed Sunday and keep the entertainment coming!
both of my parents are collectors, my mum used to collect anything elepahnt and my dad hoards things like nascar figurines and wires and all sort of stuff. exept it's not floor to ceiling piles. it's things that go into labeled totes and put into a storage unit. my dad is planning on making an eBay account to sell things he doesn't need and my mum doesn't have the space to collect things in an apartment. my dad used to never be like this until he got with my mum. my mum was raised super sheltered and used to not have to clean her own room or clothes and so my DAD literally taught her how to do laundry. she's definitely better, she's not as much of a hoarder as she used to, i'm definitely more messy than her now but we all have to remind each other that we don't actually need it, we just want it
Oh you guys don't know how truly horrible this lady is. She makes her son cry because she talks about how she dislikes the fact they were born as boys. They do an episode where they come back and see how she's doing and she's not only hoarding again, but blames it on a sister she doesn't even have. And then tries to say her husband is cheating on her with the fake sister. This is the kind of woman I think most kids would want to get away from. The dad needs to leave her and take the kids
I think the best form of fixing hoarder mentality is to allow their mentality to restructure itself. I once had 10-20 years of hard drive space I've worked on personally with no backups. It was only because I needed to install/upgrade to a new OS for my system that I formatted the drive without knowing the aftereffects and permanently erased that data. I'll be quite honest when I found out, I shrugged it off and it felt liberating. Because I can always rebuild digitally.
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I've had factor, the food is actually legit quality. Dead serious. Best food/meal prep I've tried. And I've tried a bunch of them.
Dane, you mean Taran Noah Smith
The only thing your kids will learn from you about marriage if you only keep the marriage together because of the children is that they should do the same thing for their children down the road. You do not want to instill that sort of behavior in your kids. You want better for them so set an example of what you want them to prefer for themselves in the future.
Do factor deliver to Australia? 🤔
No factor is not in Australia hence why he has videos of other people cooking it....
I live with a hoarder, my 81 year old great grandma. The smell is awful. After she passes, we're gonna have to clean it all up. I'm terrified of what we'll find in there.
I wish you and her the best
@@zurielisntanywhereThank you
Why not clean it before she passes? I have a hoarder Gma too and the family and I got together to clean her basement and house for her... idk why you'd want her last years to be in a hoard.
@@whenimmanicimgodly4228sadly most hoarders like it that way and get very distressed if you move or touch their stuff
Sending love and support❤
Deborah is one of the most intensely unlikable people to have been on Hoarders. She’s a vile, selfish person. One of the best Hoarder’s moments is Deborah’s follow up episode where she lied to the show about the new stuff she hoarded. She told them she was storing it for her sister. Her husband confronted her and told the show that she didn’t even have a sister where she then claimed her husband was lying because he was having an affair with her nonexistent sister. She’s a HORRIBLE PERSON.
They threw the sister out in her first episode. 😂
Oh god not his lady agin. I remember it took me three separate tries to watch this episode till the end a few year's go. She is the textbook definition of selfish and self centered for sure.
For some reason I see her name and pronounce it like Dabura in my head like the dragon ball villain, good to know it isn't far off from her lol
@@bag-manbaron2547 ,🤣👍🏾 your not alone I still do that when I hear that name
So she not just horrible, she's completely demented as well. Who the F in their right mind comes out with s**t like that; woman's off her nut! 😂
I've watched this ENTIRE EPISODE... and this COW... had the audacity to tell one of the staffers how she never wanted BOYS!!! Her sons, who literally have no space to sleep because they're hoarded out of their own rooms... stood right next to her crying when she said that! I dont care how mentally ill someone is... you don't say that if there's ANY possibility your children will hear it... even if you're so effed in your head to think it! But who the heck would even th8nk such a thing!?!
It’s awful and most likely damaged her kids beyond repair. I really do hope her kids found happiness for once in their lives.
An unfortunate amount of the hoarders in this show were just outright terrible people, their hoarding only magnified it. Among the various hoarders, there seemed to be a number of abusive parents.
I think the absolute worst (in terms of abusive parents) was the old lady who hoarded food and in all seriousness, made me think of a real life Marguerite Baker from RE7.
That hoarder was a genuinely evil human being; she horribly abused her daughter by slipping rotten food into her meals and making her sick.
Worse she would do it unpredictably so it caused her daughter lifelong eating disorders and food issues due to the paranoia. I think Ken actually has a video about her, but I haven't seen it. I just remember watching the episode years ago and being absolutely horrified at this monster.
@@brandonwilliams4050 Not to mention all of the animal hoarding episodes. You have to be sick on another level to see animals living in filth, with their eyes bleeding shut from infection, and think "Everything is okay."
@@pensandshakersGod I can't even watch clips of the animal hoarders. I have three pups that I give my everything to, and to see other animals in such horrible situations just hurts. That one lady who had all the chickens and such in her trailer made me want to give her a good wallop.
Man, those chickens hurt me on another level. My parents run a ton of chickens and I bonded with a lot of them as a teenager. They're such wonderful animals. It was awful to see them that way.@@TinyToadSage
If you guys see this, I want to mention something that happened in this particular episode. The mom's "chronic disappointment" that is talked about is rooted in the fact that she had too many boys as children. She says she didn't want sons and she's upset that she had them. Turns out, one of her sons in listening in while she says this, and she just says "I don't want to talk to him" when they suggest she say something to console him. She's just a Karen that needs to be divorced and alone basically. 😬
It seems to me she cares nothing for other people at all. Everything is about her. I've known people who wanted different-gender kids, but they would NEVER say it around their children. Hell, I have next to no maternal instinct whatsoever, yet even I would never do that.
The word narcissist is thrown around WAY too much for my liking, but in this case, it might be accurate. So yeah, I agree it's best for everyone to just get away from her.
@LadyTsuki she sounds like a vulnerable narcissist to me they love to play the victim in situations and feel as though everyone is out to get them.
@@honeybdews3282 Yeah, I would agree with that. I am still learning how to fully gauge vulnerable vs malignant narcissists. But yeah, she does seem paranoid with a victim mentality.
@@honeybdews3282 I personally think most hoarders are vulnerable narcissists. The walls of stuff to protect them is to protect their fragile narcissistic ego. Almost every episode of this show has all the hallmarks of a narcissist who terrorized others, built a hoard to 'protect' themselves and then used the hoard to continue to terrorize others.
I'm not convinced hoarding isn't just a narcissist personality disorder symptom.
@@LadyTsuki If they are 'mememememe, no one listens to me. Woe is me!' they are a vulnerable narc. If they are 'everyone owes me this treatment, RAWR!' they are a malignant narcissist. There is overlap though, they'll chameleon to what works with a specific person. If you respond best to crocodile tears instead of threats, they'll go with tears. I personally believe most malignant narcissists will turn into vulnerable narcissists given enough time and malignant failures/ego bruises.
The $450 dress/blouse with the tags on and all the tech still in boxes made my stomach flip. They’ve got kids, just imagine how much better off their whole family would be without all that financial waste.
Or if her children had been able to access any of the tech. Imagine needing a computer for school, knowing there's one in here somewhere but just not being able to find or use it. Or just wanted to relax because living in a hoard is stressful and you can't find the brand new xbox because your mom already lost it in the depths of the piles.
They'd all be better off if she was OUT of their lives!
“Staying together for the kids” never works. Kids would usually rather be FROM a broken home than IN one.
True. Parents argue, they don't look like they're in love, you have to get therapy, you need to teach yourself how to love in a healthy way, and everything feels tense and awkward. It's horrible.
I love this!💜
Maybe, maybe not. People are swift to divorce, and divorce is poison. Separation is not a quick fix. It is apocalyptic.
If you think being from a broken home is bad, being used a legal cudgel for one parent to bash the other with like a weapon is a million times worse. You no longer exist as a child but as a piece of legal cannon fodder used to drive the suffering of the other parent.
people that have to divorce are still toxic people and then on top of that they introduce a string of creeps and step parents into the mix that are even worse. my friends that complained about their parents staying together at least were not molested by a step father.
I remember seeing this episode in full before and one of the things she was 'disappointed' in was the fact most of her kids were boys. Made her son cry because she talked about how she disliked them simply for that.
I mean gender disappointment is real and a valid thing to feel. No woman should be shamed for feeling it. However, telling your children that and airing it out on national television isn't okay.
Wow… that’s fucked up.
She has five kids, and at least one girl (based on the clips shown), but she’s disappointed enough at having boys for it to be so important to her?
That’s crazy.
My mum was 100% positive she was going to have a boy. No way she could have a girl. Not girly enough, wouldn’t be able to bond with a girl, had to have a boy.
Oops, I’m a girl. And my mum is the greatest. She’s told me that when she bought clothes for me when I was little, she go into the shops and pick out whatever she wouldn’t be caught dead in and I always loved whatever she chose that way. We’re super close, despite my mum not really wanting a girl, and me being the girliest girl to ever girl while she’s always been a tomboy.
I can’t imagine how hard it must be for her kids to hear that their gender was so disappointing to their mother it contributed to her hoarding problem. That’s heartbreaking.
@@minxymoo2325no it's definitely not valid.
Aww its sad for everyone here
Could she be lonely because I feel like hoarding and compulsive shopping is to temporarily help with loneliness, perhaps she had an idea in her head that she would have a female child to do girly things with and that never happened, it's sad on everyone though. Maybe she doesn't have any female friends or anything like that and she feels she is missing out 😢
All because you live with a hoarder doesn't mean you are a hoarder. You're a victim of a hoarder. I've had the situation before and you can't do anything about it unfortunately.
You can't? 👀 have you never seen a trash can?
@@gregoloniousyou’d be fighting a losing battle mate. My mother was a hoarder and regardless however many times we cleaned out the house new stuff almost immediately took its place. It’s a never ending cycle and only way to resolve it is with intensive therapy. Just getting rid of the stuff won’t solve the problem
@@gregoloniousI guess you don't understand what hoarder means. It's not like they stockpile on things just one time. It keeps coming constantly.
My dad wasn’t a hoarder but he’s a lawyer and there were soooooo many documents he wasn’t allowed to trash until a certain amount of years passed so there were 2 big closets filled to the top with boxes it was soooo annoying growing up just not having any place for storage
@@gregoloniousgeuss you have never heard of empathy?
She claims she's spent $30k....if each piece of clothing only cost $5, that's already $100k. That's definitely a conservative estimate. 🤣
Ever hit a thrift? Some shops got passable clothes for as low as 4pc/3$
@@dizzydyzystill more than $30k
hey that's funny cuz today i actually did get a great top from the thrift store for $2.99 I will say though i noticed a lot of the clothing prices at my thrift has been raised slightly nowadays sadly (still good finds though)
@@dizzydyzy They showed a 450 dress with the tags still on it but okay
@@dizzydyzy does she seriously seem like the kind of person to visit thrift stores to you
“If you can name it, you can keep it” is probably the best thing I’ve done to keep myself from being a hoarder
What if you can name all of it? I can. I seem a little like a hoarder but that's because I live in a small house.
What exactly does that line means? I can understand it in a gramantical way, but not in a semantic way, if that makes sense...
@@fefiedmond1920 Most hoarders have so much stuff, they no longer know what they own. If an item is actually important to them, they would be able to make a list without looking. If something is so unimportant that they forgot it exists, then it can be thrown out. If they look at every item before it is sorted, they can just always say "oh this is my favourite xy" even though they haven't used it in years.
@@fefiedmond1920it means things that are so unimportant you literally dont know/remember they exist, so, as an example, if you have a desk and you can name all your supplies, but then forgot to list a stapler because it wasnt important enough for your mind to remember, you should get rid of it! :)
@@littlebigbear2394
Yeah but staplers are actually useful. Just because I forgot my house key doesn’t mean I don’t need the house key
I come from a family of hoarders and so does my husband. We try VERY hard to keep ourselves from going down that slippery slope, but it’s hard with two small kids. Our house isn’t the cleanest, but our children have plenty of clean space to live and play. That’s the biggest accomplishment for me.
stay vigilant. the battle is never ending
Sounds like you're doing a wonderful job 😸
Remember most ppls houses arent the cleanest. Especially not those of families. So dont be too hard on yourself. You’re probably doing great
There is child clutter and that is very different from hoarding. I'm sure you are doing just fine. It's so hard with kids because people love to give them stuff and they get so attached to everything. I have one child and he has enough toys for 5 kids.
Good job, even if your kits don’t realize it you’re doing them a service.
"I'm chronically disappointed." Never mind those kids that were probably too embarrassed to ever have friends come over the entire time they were growing up.
Right ! I know she has a problem so I won't be to hard on her but the entire situation is so selfish and teribble for those poor kids and that husband
So sad. Selfish and she's mentally ill. Her husband should have already left with the children. And let her hoard herself in. Child abuse
@@Kwa_OwenZ nah. She needs people to be too hard on her. She's a horrible person and deserves no sympathy.
Her sons face when she said everything she REALLY loved in the house was gone is just so sad.
And apparently in the full episode she told someone that she didn’t want boys while her son was listening!!!
@@giselle7432And he ended up crying near her but she full on said “I don’t want to talk to him right now” after the psychiatrist lady recommended she try to console her kid. She’s awful
I can completely sympathize with the kids. My dad is exactly like this lady but we grew up, and still live in, a two bedroom apartment. I had to just help him purge some shit because the apartment failed an inspection and we were on the verge of eviction. I saw it coming. My mom and I were doing everything we could to keep the place livable, but it was tittering. The fact that we can see his floor, not just a narrow path to his bed currently is amazing. Seriously, I could trauma dump a whole novel here. Ugg.
I’m sorry you went through that. We are here for you
So proud of u guys for pushing through for the family and so everyone can be safe!! Your doing amazing!!!! ❤❤
Poor Dad, you can tell in the scene where they are talking about how they feel, and she says "I don't feel heard", and he said "WE don't feel heard"
Chances are extremely high that they have listened to her time and time again
I have such a love-hate relationship with this show. Wish they started with therapy before just trying to get the horder to throw away 95% of their stuff. I get this is more of a shock factor and entertaining but it’s really not the way the psychological disorder should be addressed.
You have a point. Stuff like this should be handled one step at a time not all at once. Even "My 600 Lb. Life" knew that.
They do. Typically for a month, but sometimes longer.
This show is messed up. They wait until someone gets a notice from their city or county saying they have to clean up or face legal consequences, and the person from the government shows up with a producer from this show. It happened to my mother-in-law who was a hoarder and was getting a huge fine for her yard. They basically told her "we will throw you in jail for 30 days, or you can be on this tv show." She screamed at them to get off her property and found a private charity to clean the yard without putting her on tv.
@pcbassoon3892 oh jeez. I was wondering how they found people for this. I was guessing their families reached out to the show. If the show made more of an attempt to address the mental health issues underneath then it would feel less Predatory, kinds like how judges choose community service over jail
I wish they made them do therapy before doing this to them. Its such a massive change and then they have to learn how to cope with it. The chances of therapy being successful at this point is so low
My grandma was a hoarder and now that she has dementia she’s in a stage of that where she wants to get rid of stuff finally. Except now it’s just about everything and stuff that maybe other family have wanted (like things from her mom), it’s been tricky to navigate. Don’t wish hoarding on anyone! Having to be the one trying to deal with a family member with it and then seeing how she struggled it’s really awful
Ken inspires me.. My parents said if i get 50K followers They'd buy me a professional camera for recording..begging u guys , literally
Begging...
It's hard to see a close fam member dealing with dementia or alzheimers 😢
let her put the good stuff in bags, tell her you'll get rid of it, then let the fam go through it lol. She doesn't need to know how it got taken care of.
Dementia is so hard to deal with. One day my grandma sat me down, near tears and begged me to stop wrestling gators. I'm a 4' 11" woman and live in Arizona. I promised that I would never wrestle gators ever again. I've held up that promise. Nana was funny with her dementia. My grandpa, on the other hand, gets mean. It's so different from person to person. My mom is showing signs of dementia. She's gonna be a mean one. It's going to be interesting. At least I have experience.
@@feraltaco4783 similar to mine. Gotta laugh at the crazy things their minds come up with lol mine told me so randomly after she woke up from a nap “my sister k!lls people, did you know that?” Like her sister is so sweet would never be a chance of that so when I told her sister of this new found “job” of sorts her sister claims she has, she said she only does that on thursdays 😅😂 but yeah definitely get the mood swings and oh boy, the things she can say cut like a knife but I know it’s not really her. Or try to tell myself that anyway. I’ve been her caregiver for a year now and it’s been a lot of learning and changing to match up with what stage she keeps getting to
I have hoarding tendencies as well. Clothes tend to be my weakness, and there is trash in my living area occasionally, but I’m not emotionally attached to it, it just ends up being too overwhelming to clean up. Recently, while watching all the hoarders videos you guys make, i’ve been making an effort to clean, and I’ve already donated 5 bags of clothes, and chucked all the trash! Watching you guys react to these episodes definitely puts a positive spin on it, sometimes watching hoarders alone just feels too sad, so thank you for what you guys do! ❤
Congratulations! That is a really huge step and you should be very proud of yourself!
nice!!!
that's an amazing step forward!! you've got this :)
Good for you! It’s tough to make changes but youre already doing just that. Kudos to you 😊😊😊
Throw away 30! Thing a day for 30 days every 30 days
I've never understood a married couple staying together to avoid 'a broken home'. Your kids will be WAY worse off if they're stuck in a home that's full of tension and resentment and fighting. It's so stupid.
I would think that if a couple had kids they should put in extra effort in saving the marriage .Once you have kids with someone you will have to deal with for the next 20 years to some degree .Add to that if either person remarries there is added issues. If the marriage has a chance work it out but if they are always fighting and hate each other it is worse for the kids than a ‘broken’ family.
@beckyshell4649 Yeah I'm not saying they should give up straight away but if they've put work in and it's no use then yeah don't make the kids have to deal with their home constantly being a battlefield
My parents never have and never will make the effort to fix things, they’d both rather just ignore the problems, keep arguing and hating each other under the same roof and torture me. All I can do is move out and let them at each other
It irritates me when parents think their kid's love is a given, an unconditinal thing and the kids can't bear the thought of being separated from one of their parents...
While it's true for some children, not for all. If you're like this woman is, or other abusive parents, there's a high chance your kids are happy to see you pack your bags.
my ex’s parents did that and literally sat their kids down to tell them they are only staying together because of them 😢
My mother in law is a hoarder. When she starts to get rid of stuff, she usually tries to give it to us. If we refuse, she'll keep it. So, I usually agree to take her stuff and throw it away or donate it after about a month. She never asks about it again because she's forgotten it.
This was one of the most manipulative perpetual victims on the show. Probably the most difficult episode to watch considering how emotionally abusive she was to her poor sons. I really hope they all got away from her.
She’s a god-tier narcissist for sure
@@faefiercevulpine6990 most hoarders have narcissistic tendencies. Usually developed as a defence mechanism from abuse or complex trauma.
Bought a hoarders house for pretty cheap and am in the process of remodeling it. Took about a month of fighting my way through normal work and clearing this place out to even be ready for a normal remodel process. It left me both angry and just sad, these people need some therapy
Find anything cool?
that’s the only way to get an affordable home rn
@@luna_R0s3 I got around 3 whole sets of dishes from back when brown was the cool color to have and some Tupperware from the same era, other than that a lot of moldy clothes
Yep. My dad was a kid during the great depression. My siblings and I think that's why he horded things.
I didn't know buying a house with stuff still in it was a thing. I totally get why you'd feel the way you described. When you have a beautiful house soon enough, hopefully it will all have been worth it.
My mom is a low-level hoarder. So as someone who lives with one, I can tell you her being a hoarder and living in her house absolutely does not make me one. It is incredibly hard to clean up after a hoarder on your own. Not only because the messes are always beyond what one person should have the responsibility of doing, but because the areas you clean never stay clean. Your efforts feel fruitless, because even if the area stays clean for a while, eventually it goes right back to how it was.
I agree. In my case, my father is the hoarder of old electronics. My mother won't clean up after herself. I grew up in that, my brother still lives in it. My father has acknowledged (sorta) that he has an issue and is working on it, but it's still obvious. While I was there, it was difficult to try to keep up with one hoarder who cleans, and another parent who just doesn't clean anything, and my brother who also doesn't clean (he just got back from Army AIT and bootcamp, still waiting to see if that's changed). As soon as I moved out, the bathroom I used became disgusting and crowded with stuff. I am not a hoarder. Everyone teases the girls who like the beige and white aesthetic, but I realized for me, it's because it symbolizes clean and calm. It's boring, and that's fantastic for someone who grew up with hoarders.
You wrote this perfectly. Took the words out of my mouth. My mom is also a low-level hoarder. It’s not our fault or responsibility, although we still try.
one must imagine Sisyphus happy
Or you've emptied a room only to have it fill up with new stuff from another room.
You've made a pile to make another pile to go through the third pile while the fourth moves to a new room.
Years ago, a low-level hoarder relative was paying me to help her "organize". And I really needed the money at the time, but after two or three times going over there, I had to give up on it. She wouldn't let me throw anything away, and it just felt like such a pointless waste of time. Like I was supposed to magically shrink all this crap to make it take up less space. I can't imagine having to actually live with someone like that.
As a child of a hoarder who grew up in this mess, the mental image of the son crawling out of the hoard to freedom had me cracking up 🤣 so freaking true metaphorically and literally lol
Her family is miserable because of her! Such a pathetic human and MOTHER! Those poor children who grew up in that house! My heart breaks for them!
I grew up in a hoard. Now as an adult who has lived on her own for years, I’m so bad about immediately tossing anything without use and I drive myself nuts keeping my apartment ‘show home’ style. Everything in its place, everything clean. Not sure if that’s much healthier but it’s the result.
I don't know if it's healthier but at least you'll never find dead vermin or feces piled on your carpet under layers of trash.
Edit: Just read this back and concluded that, of course your way is healthier!
You went to the complete other side of the spectrum. My mom did that. One example, I had the complete first print run of Pokemon cards. Including holos. The Charizard alone is worth between 50-80k. When I came back to get my stuff after boot camp, she had tossed it along with all my old school games from Atari to PS2. My final fantasy 7 was worth $700. I was fuqing PI$$ED. Just because it isn't in immediate use doesn't mean it's worthless. I had rare Nintendo games like the SNES TMNT and the first Metroid.
@@hezemoth How is that not useful? You know that's the basic premise for investments right? By your logic, the stock market is useless. Not to mention my dad was the one that got me most of that stuff. The sentimental value was massive as well.
If you look at one of the comments on the video clip, it’s mentioned that Deborah hated having boys while her sons can hear her in the other room. Guess we know where her “Chronically Disappointed” feelings come from. In the photo it looks like she has 4 boys and 1 girl.
Damn, that's harsh...
She was forced to give the girl up for adoption by her husband according to other viewers. The resentment has clear roots
@@kissit012 wait really? I would need to check the comments.
@@kissit012WHAT WHY!?
@@kissit012 I just read an article that she says otherwise. It says she made her daughter do pageants and she’d fill the house full of frilly dresses and everything. And why she had rooms painted pink she’s obsessed.
My kid got a piece of wood from a flood stuck in their foot at the end of June. 3 heavy duty antibiotics, antiseptic soaks twice a day, and antibiotic slave twice a day. The docs treated the wound, they treated for both sewage and harmful chemical exposure. The puncture was massively infected and surrounded by red infection lines in less thay 24 hours. Flood waters are disgusting, no joke.
Imagine how much money she could bring in just selling most of that stuff on eBay.
Hell she could open her own thrift store
Unfortunately, it's not that easy. Despite hoarders' claims that they care about everything they have, they treat it like trash-throwing it in heaps like a landfill and not taking care of it. All that stuff likely REEKS of hoard. It becomes a biohazard and irresponsible to give to others. You'd have to wash all those clothes and clean all the objects before passing them along. It's too much to properly sterilize and delouse.
This mind set actually enables hoarding the idea that they'll donate it one day or sell the valuable things gives them excuses to keep it unfortunately speaking from experience
I have several relatives who have been or are in the medical field and 3 of them act like they know nothing about sanitation or keeping a house in a hygienic and healthy way. Like auntie, you're an RN, you know piles of cat poo in your house are going to cause problems with your health!! It melts my brain.
This was my least favorite episode. Dorothy is the sweetest organizer. That women is LUCKY she didn’t get Matt Paxton!!🤣
Yeah, Matt does NOT put up with any B.S.
Matt would chew that woman a knew one...
Or Cory! He would’ve just let her ruin herself
I think Matt would have exploded if he'd been there to hear her say she resented her sons for being boys. Or to hear her saying her family doesn't listen to her when she clearly is the one in charge of and ruling the home with her hoarding fists. This woman was a pathological liar and Matt wouldn't have put up with it. Wish he had been there instead of Dorothy. Some hoarders need a nicer touch, but some are bad people that just deserve to have Matt scold them.
Lmao I love Matt
As someone that has grew up with grandparents and parents that are hoarders, I have grown to be a huge clean freak and have to keep things organized or I lose my mind :(
I'm such a control freak due to the environment I grew up in😔
Omg same, everything in my house is (has to be) minimalist, decluttered and organized. I have a routine of deep cleaning my house quarterly and anything that hasn't been moved or used in the last 3 months is donated, sold or thrown away.
I was diagnosed with OCD and feel it all comes from living between filth and hoarding growing up.
I can feel you.
My mom is a hoarder and I became a bit of a neat freak after I moved out. But after my kids and the whole nesting stage? Oh god, I become physically stressed if things are not cleaned up and put away. I seriously should probably look into getting help for it
My room got messy to the point of hoarding in 4th grade, so my dad made me watch the first episode of Hoarders. Right after it was finished I spent 3 hours cleaning my room since it dawned on me I was living in a junkyard. I couldn't imagine living in a house like this, I hope that anybody suffering with this gets the support they need.
The house wasn't even a home. It was just HER closet.
I'm assuming she holds onto stuff, because she doesn't want to face the truth of what's going on with her marriage and family. So shopping has become an addiction to get her out and away from it all. It's like a security blanket of trash.
My grandma wasn’t necessarily a hoarder to this extreme, she grew up around art and so did my grandpa and he actually was an artist. So the house was cluttered with paintings and antiques and honestly it was like a museum and they have always fostered creativity in their household so no one really minded. You could walk and see the floor, the walls were just covered in art.
When they moved into assisted living, we were cleaning out their house and came to the room behind the kitchen. We didn’t really have a name for it. It housed the laundry room and a sink and a pantry and had a door to go out back, name it what y’all want. Anyway, we’re clearing things out and my mom came across a STOCKPILE (think extreme couponing) of CANNED SALMON.
No one in that household had ever ate canned salmon and my dad had no clue there was even a stockpile.
There must’ve been like 100 cans and when we asked her about it, she said there was a really good sale on tuna but when she got there there wasn’t any tuna left so she bought the salmon instead thinking she would incorporate it into a dish and just never did🤣
I love my grandma and her ways and I miss her dearly, but I will always think about this story whenever anyone mentions hoarders.
Sounds like a cool lady who loved art and had one extremely random, bizarre moment of hoarding 😂
@@Vegoonery big facts.
That room would be called a mudroom in the Midwest U.S.
@@harleycarroll4775 thank you. I couldn’t for the life of me remember what she called it.
are the cans still available? love me some fishy
17:19 I once played in a retention pond at the bottom of the hill from several houses when I was a kid. Not nearly as toxic and gross as flood water, but retention pounds are a PART of flood waters, so anyway, I played in that water 3 days in a row before an adult caught me and told me how chemical runoff and some sewage runs down into that pound. So I stopped playing in it. Several days later bumps started forming on my back, shoulder, and forearms. Went to a dermatologist and they had NO clue what was wrong with my skin as they’d need a sample of the water tested by someone else first. My parents felt that was to much trouble so they just bought me Benadryl cream from K-Mart at the time and hoped for the best. 28 years later, I’m 38 now, still to this day when I’m outside in the heat for to long the bumps come back and my skin gets super sensitive and raw feeling. So sensitive that it hurts even to blow on it. And that’s just coming into contact with retention point water, which probably only makes up 10% of what’s in flood water
You are lucky you didn't get that brain eating amoeba.
Clearly, you mutated into a toad man.
Oh I get these bumps in the sun. It's because I have very sensitive skin (I'm a redhead so the sun hates me anyway and on top of sensitive skin). Basically heat rash.
The chemicals probably peeled the layers of your skin in a way that left you with sensitive skin permanently. especially if you didn't prep your skin for it or care for the stripped away layers properly at the time (you wouldn't have known to so not your fault).
You can get a prescription for a gentler antihistamine from your doctor for cheaper than over the counter stuff (I like montelukast/singulair but another might be better for you) and it helps control the rash when you know you'll be out in the sun or sweating a lot.
@@gircakes2 I used to joke about that all the time! Maybe I’ll turn into a ninja turtle. I’m a 80 & 90s kid lol
@@prettyevil6662000 maybe 10-20 years ago I would have considered it but it doesn’t really bother me now. I have more serious health stuff to worry about at the moment lol but I think your right. I mean, that makes sense.
I lived in a hoarder trap house... And let's just say it was gnarly. I was a minor at the time and had 3 younger siblings all in diapers.. the smell of that House was disgusting we also had three cats and a dog so as you can imagine trash and feces everywhere. And tons of clothes, Toys, food, and random projects never finished stacked on top of each other. I remember having cps come and take my siblings away for a week while they hired a clean up crew for the house full hazmat gear and everything, before they even came we had thrown three truck loads of trash to the dump. We also had a fly infestation and had to consistently fly bomb the house multiple times just to make it livable, I remember having a fan face me while I slept because otherwise they would land and crawl on my face....and by the time I had moved out at 16 there were rats in the walls you could hear at night and a leak from the upstairs bathroom from my dad and his gfs room had started seeping through the second story floor, through the kitchen light fixture and onto the ground.. so my parents started to just manually turn our water off. This year I'm 18 and on the 4th of July it caught on fire and burned to the ground. No one was inside (2 months prior my parents had started moving into an apartment so everyone was safe!) But god that was such a relief everything is finally gone.
Edit: clarification and spelling 🖤
Honestly, it's best to just start clean. The fire was a blessing in disguise as long as no one got hurt.
Sounds like the house from when I was in high school (besides the fire part. I almost wish that happened). My mom and her boyfriend just would not clean. I gave up. The house was trashed- literally. Garbage everywhere. Dishes in the sink piled up for months. Mold everywhere. And the flies. Oh the flies. That’s why I stopped washing the dishes. I had to wear a face mask and my glasses otherwise they would attack my face. I gave up and would eat out instead.
After cleaning up after them for so long, I got burnt out and started doing the same to my own room. That’s when I decided it was time to leave. It took me 2 years, but I finally found a place for myself.
I also decided to leave because of the rats in the walls. They chewed through the walls to the kitchen. Anything on the floor was theirs. I stayed out of the kitchen after I saw the first one. I don’t know how many of them there were either, but they were huge.
Now that I’m in my own place, it’s much better. Occasionally when it starts getting messy, I think back to that house and I run around trying to clean. I can’t do that filthy, moldy, critter infested type of living ever again. I can’t comment on smell because I (thankfully) don’t have a very good one
people really be writing novels on youtube thinking ppl will read them
Many ppl do read them. No need to be the ahole.@@vicky_skates
I remember this episode. The lady was so upset with the decor. She is such an awful person. The way she talked to her youngest was heartbreaking.
I had an ex who was a hoarder, and who’s parents are hoarders. We didn’t work out for lots of reasons that didn’t have to do with that: but I am so glad to not have to worry about it. Hoarders need therapy for so many things. Genuinely, I hope he’s okay and is getting help because he was really struggling.
When my parents told my brother and I that they were splitting up, my younger brother flipped out. My first thought was "FINALLY!" All they ever did was argue. The divorce was hard but even as a kid I knew that it needed to happen.
When buff said “I was never skinny enough for Hollister I felt that 😂
20:07
Your mom hates Christmas ✅
She’s a hoarder ✅
You’re parents are fighting but they’re staying together “for you” ✅
Ngl, all of that’s the tip of the iceberg where I grew up, but it still all really sucked.
I live in a opposite situation. After my grandfather died, my grandma asked me and my husband to move in with her and if we took care of her, she'd leave us the house. She calls us hoarders because we have some stuff in an unused room were we do our hobbies. It's nothing like a actual hoarders room even if my husband's desk is a little cluttered. But you know why we have so much stuff in one room? Because it's the only room besides our bedroom we are allowed to have anything in. When we moved in she literally wanted us to throw ALL our stuff away except our clothes because "we don't need it" we just got married a year prior and all of stuff was new. We aren't allowed to decorate or hang our pictures up. If we leave anything on the kitchen table we are called hoarders. She will freak out if she thinks anyone is coming over and the house doesn't look like its ready to be a show house. She freaks out if our 1 year old brings toys in the living room. It's ridiculous.
you should do the hoarders episode where the wife was addicted to shopping at the mall and it hoarded up her whole house. Her husband's a diabetic where he could lose his foot if he were to cut it or hurt it in the hoard, or something. And she didn't care about her husband's issues at all. Hoarding is no joke.
Ken and Dane never fail to entertain me. I love you guys!
As someone with divorced parents I can genuinely say they made the best decision possible for them and for me. They went from arguing and crying constantly to hugging and having lunch on my drop off days when they swapped me. It was the absolute best thing for me. They weren’t married and I had two homes but they were happy and got along so much better. It was a great example for me that you can love someone and care for them but be happier and more respectful to one another separately.
20:21 I kinda get how she’s feeling. It’s too many changes at once. It’s very overwhelming.
This brings back memories. Not good ones. For 4 years I lived in a hoarder house. My mom is obsessed with buying things- mostly furniture and art supplies at the time. And her boyfriend hated cleaning, and would often make weird concoctions in the kitchen (apparently it was food).
It was my job to clean “because you’re so good at it”. So I would constantly clean as best as I could for about 2.5-3 years straight, I’d do the floors, pick up garbage, sort the laundry, do the dishes, hell, I’d even cook. At this same time, I was a full high school student and I had a job on the weekends. I still don’t know how I managed to do it for as long as I did.
Eventually I got burnt out. Day in and day out of cleaning a never ending cycle of garbage and dog shit was tiring. And yes, literal dog shit. My mom didn’t let out her dogs as often as she should, but one of them had bladder issues after having puppies. But anyways, I eventually stopped cleaning everything.
Then the bugs came. My mom tried to force me to clean, but the bugs would attack my face when I got near the sink or oven. I had to wear a face mask and glasses. I still couldn’t keep up. Motivation lost.
Then the rats came. I officially stopped using the kitchen. The bugs and rats could have it. I ate out a bunch. I wasn’t stepping foot in that kitchen. Rats would chew through anything left on the ground. My bag of cereal we just bought the night before, some hamburger buns that didn’t get put away, the bag of dog food. They ate it all.
So then I looked for 2 years for a place of my own. My bedroom was once the cleanest room in the house, became a trash heap.
Then the mice came. I completely lost motivation. I heard the scratching at night. I could never find them though. I never did. But I knew they were there. I finally found a place after searching for 2 years, I moved out in 3 days.
My apartment looks great. Occasionally it does get messy, but it’s a very quick fix when I start thinking about high school. I just can’t do it again. When I’m able to stay on top of it, my place is picture perfect. For the first month of moving in, I woke up with a huge smile on my face. I was constantly cleaning to make sure it stayed “perfect”. I eventually loosened up a bit
I feel you with the mice. I had to hide food in my room to keep it from getting eaten. I still eat out because I don't trust buying food and storing it.
I think her 'STUFF' defined her.
I would imagine she is feeling a deep sense of loss.
But... She will get over it and 100% certain she will start hoarding at lightspeed again.
Holy cow! Even if she paid $1 for each item of clothing in that pile, she's at 20 grand 😲
"i was never skinny enough to wear their clothes" same, and was sad about it at the time. TJ Maxx is still an absolute banger. I can get my michael kors, discount slacks, AND home goods? I walk out feeling blessed LOL
20:17 “mom, what’s over (or under) the tree?” LMFAO
8:41 Statistically speaking, kids that grow up in a family with parents who are constantly arguing do fare slightly better than kids who grew up and the parents divorced during their childhood.
The sad thing is that marriage therapy should be the step before divorce, but so many people don't even try it and go straight to divorce.
Sometimes theres Hoarders I genuinely feel bad for, or ones I believe can be helped. She however, will probably live and die in that trash pit
To quote one of my patients who owned a company that aided in cleanups after natural disasters including hurricanes and is now in his 80’s: “Don’t these people realize they have orifices in question?!” The one person who dropped down in the flood water is genuinely concerning to me.
These hoarding stories are really sad...
I heard of one where the son of a hoarder woman disappeared and they thought he ran away
Only to find his body later in his room beneath all the trash.
I was born and raised in a hoarder home and I can confirm the smell and mess is disgusting and humiliating, especially for non-hoarders who are stuck living with them.
This is seriously dangerous and I hope they get the help they need-
Tf happened? Did bro drown in the trash??
@@littlemoth4956that’s basically how it happens. Hoarders pile their stuff really high. Sometimes the piles get to be too big and fall. When a pile with that much stuff falls on you, you can get stuck- mostly from the weight alone. You never know what could be in those piles. The weight plus if there’s cloth in them, it muffles your screams. Then you’re kinda just stuck there until you die or someone finds you. A really scary and sad way to go
It wasn't your fault you were born into that. You are not your parents, your trauma, or your past humiliations. ♥
@@amberb.6395i can't even imagine dying like that.....slowly dying in absolute filth and trying so desperately to get out....ugh that poor boy.
You can't bring anyone over. It cripples your social life. Adding that renting is much more expensive it's harder to get out.
Let me explain what chronically disappointed means.
When they encounter a problem, they feel helpless or inable to change the outcome. Some of their problems depend on other people, raise for example, or some depend on luck, sudden repair jobs etc. what does this mean? They feel like they have no control over their life. And they get some comfort finding this missing control in hoarding, what they have and how they have is important. Someone going through her stuff is not a favor, it is an invasion of personal space, destruction of the remaining control. She wasnt a jerk, she was traumatised by this. Any expose should be suggested after a long consideration. This was for the entertainment value, i doubt it helped her in any long lasting way.
What she needs is getting control over her life, being proactive, and the same time, getting aware of the fact that she doesnt need those stuff. But now, she feels vulnerable and attacked. You know where she will find comfort after this. She will be more protective over her stuff and interpret any kind of help offer as offensive. Good job producers, hecking A.
From someone who did grow up without Christmas, birthdays and any other “holiday” in between as well as many other “normal” things to grow up with when you can see everyone else doing it, it does start to become a very lonely and bland existence
Every time another episode of hoarders drops it makes me want to go through my entire apartment again and clean and declutter. I didn't grow up with hoarders but I moved in to a home when I was 18 and the homeowner was a hoarder so bad that it spilled out into her front yard. It is a very sad mental illness that really opened my eyes because there is nothing quite like seeing a hoard that bad in person and experiencing that.
Love that Ken always manages to upload a video 5 minutes before I wake up always a good way to start
Damn, that's so handy
For me its 1hr before i sleep. Perfect timing too!
The amount of times I was told as a kid it was my fault the house was like that was cause I didn't clean is insane
Bruh you just described mine too 😂
that plus never being taught to clean and never seeing anyone else do it 🙌
15:12 “I can never voice my whole opinion because you shut it down all the time.” Her “opinion” is that nothing should be thrown away, and that’s the problem. She has a condition, not an opinion, and it’s ruining her health, the health of those around her, any animals they may have, and the mental wellbeing of everyone involved. Her psychologist needs to be reprimanded for trying to make this a two-sided fault scenario, because it isn’t and never has been. She’s sick, and her family is desperately trying to help her but she refuses it. That’s her problem, not theirs
Elderly protective services needs to take action. Poor guy and his kids stuck with a hoarder.
The sad thing is I can relate a teensy tiny bit to this hoarder. Sudden changes like a surprise can often frustrate me at first but I'm aware its a lack of control thing. Kind of a leftover from my now very dead abusive grandma. The rest of this hoarders behavior sickened me but I still had a sort of ping of empathy at one part
I'm the same. I hate change, but I imagine it stems from my anxiety.
Same, for me it's bc of my autism, this would genuinely be hell for me lmao
I think the bird is Hollister
To be fair, renovating a person's home can be pretty disastrous if you don't know their tastes... It's a little different for the houses that are basically destroyed, but hers just seemed to need some cleaning once the junk was gone
A lot of times, hoarding issues come from a place in childhood where the person has experienced a loss of something important. It can also stim from other underlying issues like ADHD, anxiety, depression and other disorders that induce a lot of stress. Sometimes it’s also it’s just plain old forgetfulness.
My mom is a hoarder, and we have been slowly working on it with her for years. She’s always afraid of not having what she needs when she needs it, even though what she needs is somewhere lost in the mass of stuff. We used to have clothes piled up to the ceiling, and my dad and I had to sit her down and work on it with her for at two decades. (I’m 30.) She forgets where she put the thing she needs, and gets super overwhelmed when she has to find it. So she’d rather go out and buy it again, then spend the time looking for it. She has ADD, and she hates cleaning. She gets so overwhelmed even looking at the mess, and gets so depressed. It’s heartbreaking. Having been a child of a hoarder, I had to learn and teach myself what not to do. It’s interesting having a mom who is so afraid of letting anything go, and having a father who, though mental and physical abuse, was trained to never care about or have attachment to anything living and not.
Oof, my mom's the same; I'm 30 too
My brother and I just chucked out a load of 25+ year old hair products that we've moved across the country we found in the basement. She's got a ton of "multiples" cuz she can't/won't find the original ones within the hoard
She's got a billion pounds of clothes in a dozen different sizes. She got me a package of onesies a few weeks ago-- I'm not pregnant and neither of my siblings have kids
It's exhausting
I use to live with a hoarder. I left because they became violent but after over 2 years I just got rid of the last of their hoard. Most of the stuff hadn’t been moved or opened since we moved to that place in 2019
That’s so terrible. I’m so sorry you had to go through that. Glad you’re out of that situation.
From my understanding with a lot of hoarders, at least the messy kind, it really is about control.
Even though it's obvious their living space is better when they have people come and help clean it, they still hate it.
8:27 staying married and fighting is much worse. my parents argued everyday when i was in elementary school and i was scared thinking one would murder the other or me and i was so happy when they got divorced when i was 9 it might have been the happiest day of my life, my mom told me and i gleefully asked if i could tell my friends. They never hit each other or anything just loudly argued every day and i just tried to avoid them
Damn. I wish I had $30,000 to spend frivolously like her.
It's more like $300,000.
"I hate Christmas"
Think she'd love it, goes hand in hand with her irrational need to buy shit.
But then she has to buy things for OTHER people... and that's just disappointing for her
My parents (in their 70s) are hoarders of Chinese junk they buy on amazon.
My dad said he was planning on tossing out old stuff. Which means he was making space for the amazon junk. So me and my siblings have slowly and quietly taking out all the sentimental and valuable things they want to toss out.
Cast iron pans, corningware dishes, and crystals go to my sisters.
I took the reel to reel and other cool vintage electronic things. Also got a tv from the 60s still working, and classic radio from the 40s.
We couldn't save the garage kept 70s f150 as my dad junked it. We're gonna take the family photos just in case they lose their minds some day and toss that out as well. There was so much cool stuff we couldn't save but at least we got the sentimental stuff. That can't be replaced.
As an archivist, i deeply appreciate that you kept that vintage tech. They are off their rocker to get rid of that stuff to make way for chinese garbage... Always great to see someone who values traditional stuff too 0_0
“I have 5 kids” DANG 😂😂😂 1:05
"He climbed out!," Got me!! I laughed far too hard and long. Thank you for getting me out of life's irritating terms for a few. Im better now.
She didn't say she hated Christmas said she didn't like surprises. The unexpected can harbor a lot of anxiety for them. They still do this for other people tho, it's just that they themselves don't like being given something as a surprise. Sometimes it's also just easier to shop for yourself than let others get you gifts.
Or I have an Amazon list to share. At least I know the gift is one of the things I want/ need
My mom was/is a hoarder. Whenever I tried to throw things away somehow itd always turn up in the house. 🙄 Now I'm obsessed with having a clean house and afraid of dirt.
"what's under, or over, the tree?" - Dane that was too good 😂😂
A few years ago my mum worked for the our council cleaning homes and two of her co-workers went to a job one day where the home owner said, in short "Ive had a shopping addiction for decades, this house is just where i store it all. Please empty it, keep what you want, sell it, chuck it out, i dont care i just need it gone" She'd married a millionaire and funded her hording/shopping problems for nearly 20 years. It was a large beachfront property (unused summer home) filled to the brim with brand-new, boxed, stuff, all expensive, from high end clothes and accessories to tech stuff and home goods...
DOROTHY IS A SAINT LITERALLY SHE IS SO KIND AND AMAZING SO COMPASSIONATE I LOVE HER SHES NOT A KAREN LMAO
There is a youtuber who cleans her depressed viewers houses for free if you wanted to see some extreme conditions. The RUclipsr is Auri Katerina i think? She has a strang4 european accent and happily digs into the cesspool. I highly recommend giving it a watch. ❤
I’m gonna go check her out after this! Thanks for the suggestion! 😊
I'm subscribed to her. She is wonderful.
Oh check out not the worst cleaner also she does the same thing. ❤
There’s tons of cleaning people out there like I love watching Auri but there’s also “cleaning with Barbie” and I enjoy watching her too, she’s just more serious and focused.
My mom was like that when she was alive. After she past away it took a solid week of hauling off truck loads to the dump and goodwill.
What makes someone a hoarder isn’t keeping and acquiring lots of stuff….what makes them a hoarder is forming an emotional bond with literal garbage and it hurts them emotionally equal to the death of a close friend to throw something away.
when a clean house is your worst nightmare you should really go and touch some grass 😂
Ken said “5 KIDS” as if he doesn’t have 4 himself 😭
Cuz he knows how hard it is to raise the 4 he has and he’s mentally stable. 😂 5 from this lady is to much.
5:30 he survived this, he climbed out 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 lol omg 😂😂🎉 iconic
I see the house transformation as an opportunity. If she liked to see pink walls, and now they're blue, well now she can access them to paint them pink again. She wasn't seeing pink walls before because of the damage from her own hoarding.
As someone who grew up in a hoarder house. I basically was just as messy as my mom when I lived there. You kind of sit in a situation where you give up. You get beaten down over and over. Oh, I'm going to do laundry turns into oh, there is no way to get to the laundry room or the washer is broken so now I have to go to the laundromat but only when my mom has the energy to do so. I bought a lot of things too just to feel good because the rest of the house was a disaster. My dad basically has just accepted being in a trashy house and my mom blames him for not helping enough.
When I moved out, I got panic attacks over fruit flies. I hyper-cleaned so aggressively that I caused injury to myself (slipped a disc). I've learned a happy medium at this point with therapy. And I refuse to go back in their house, especially overnight, because the last time I had a panic attack and an allergic reaction to something. Plus, I fell down the damn stairs because it was covered in random clothes.
But sometimes, my poor boyfriend gets to watch me purge everything I see that I can't find an immediate use for. It's hard.
"Chronically disappointed" LOL. Psychology really is something anyone can do, just gotta make shit up and let people use it to justify their tantrums.
In my own head canon people who live in these houses are the best at parkour, when they navigate their house it’s like playing assassins creed.
the house i grew up in as a kid wasn’t nearly this bad, but there were still lots of items strewn around the living room floor. it sucked most of the time but it was the perfect setup for playing the floor is lava
Trying to move into a new apartment and realizing how many boxes worth of junk I have has made me feel more like a hoarder than I ever have 😂 this episode made me feel a lot better about my 15 tubs lol
I’ve been watching Ken and Buff for quite awhile now. And I’ve been waiting for the day Ken releases a video that lands on the same day as my birthday. Today is that day. I turn 21 today and I am so thankful for all the great work you guys put out. Hope you all have a blessed Sunday and keep the entertainment coming!
Happy birthday 🎂
@@IrishHndGrenade thank you very much!
I LOVE that you constantly call them out for saying shit just for the views.
both of my parents are collectors, my mum used to collect anything elepahnt and my dad hoards things like nascar figurines and wires and all sort of stuff. exept it's not floor to ceiling piles. it's things that go into labeled totes and put into a storage unit. my dad is planning on making an eBay account to sell things he doesn't need and my mum doesn't have the space to collect things in an apartment. my dad used to never be like this until he got with my mum. my mum was raised super sheltered and used to not have to clean her own room or clothes and so my DAD literally taught her how to do laundry. she's definitely better, she's not as much of a hoarder as she used to, i'm definitely more messy than her now but we all have to remind each other that we don't actually need it, we just want it
You guys help me through my depression ❤
Ken “DANG SHE GOT 5 KIDS!”
Also Ken : has 4 😂😂
Because he knows 😂
Oh you guys don't know how truly horrible this lady is. She makes her son cry because she talks about how she dislikes the fact they were born as boys.
They do an episode where they come back and see how she's doing and she's not only hoarding again, but blames it on a sister she doesn't even have. And then tries to say her husband is cheating on her with the fake sister. This is the kind of woman I think most kids would want to get away from. The dad needs to leave her and take the kids
I think the best form of fixing hoarder mentality is to allow their mentality to restructure itself.
I once had 10-20 years of hard drive space I've worked on personally with no backups.
It was only because I needed to install/upgrade to a new OS for my system that I formatted the drive without knowing the aftereffects and permanently erased that data.
I'll be quite honest when I found out, I shrugged it off and it felt liberating. Because I can always rebuild digitally.
20:50 "Looking at her, the average person would think, what a jerk!" Ken: "Yes." LOOOOL