Arthur's Depersonalization Recovery Story (2024)
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- Опубликовано: 2 апр 2024
- 04:25 Depersonalization From Weed
07:00 "I thought I was still high!"
10:03 DPDR got better
11:27 DPDR returns after 15 years
15:17 Finding the word 'Depersonalization'
17:04 "The worst weeks of my life"
22:00 Arthur's Lowest Point
26:04 Smoking a joint like a cigarette
29:08 Starting to recover from DPDR
33:04 Existential Thoughts
35:08 What Does Depersonalization Recovery Feel Like?
38:27 Can You REALLY Get Back To Normal?
44:12 The DP Manual
47:58 Medical Awareness of DPDR
51:53 Advice for DPDR sufferers
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Arthur (32) is from Brazil 🇧🇷 Back in 2009, he first experienced feelings of Depersonalization after a bad weed experience. It faded away in time. But then in December of last year, the feelings came back as the result of a panic attack.
Arthur struggled with Depersonalization Disorder and its symptoms for about 3 months. But fortunately he has since made a complete recovery! As he wrote to me in a recent email: "I'm feeling great and living my life normally. Getting bored, getting happy, crying, laughing... Just back to normal!"
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For anyone struggling with this,. . You have to understand that it will eventually fade away. I had DR for a couple months when I was around 21 or 22 years old. I thought I was going crazy. I felt stuck in my own head till the day that I sat down on a chair that I had in my room and asked myself, "Are you going to let this take control of your life?" As a Christian, I was always taught to never become a slave to anything. Since that day, I have been "free." Don't get me wrong, I still have some "episodes" from time to time, but they prob last a day or a couple of hours. Just let yourself go through it; don't fight it. Try your hardest not to even think about it. Sometimes things like DP and DR can become an open cage or cell. The door is wide open, but you are still sitting there because you believe or think something might be wrong. Stop holding on, family! Let it go! I LOVE YOU!!!!
STAY HEALTHY💪🏽
GET RICH 🤑
& SMELL AMAZING 🤩 WHILE DOING IT!!
peace ✌🏽
Did u try smoking again
@@Userr368not weed. Weed is what gave me my DR episodes
@@AttackOfTheColognesi just want to smoke again
Thank you so much, Shaun!
Happy to help! 😊
My eye floaters are gone! 💚💚
Glad to hear it! 😊
Oh man so glad to hear that :D they do not bother me much, but maan I wish they would go away!
my visual snow is a lot less than before but i still have it even after recovering😢
@@AC--13000 sorry to hear that :/ I wonder what do you see. I reckon I also have it but it's either a) very mild, almost unnoticeable b) I had it all my life (and will have) but only now started to notice it (and after I am healed I won't).
@Dpmanaul can this be the case? During DPDR you can see snow and floaters but the truth is they were always there and only now you notice them? My floaters seem to vanish at some time during the day.
@@daumele i’m not sure too. There’s a chance that i had it before but by this point it has become so small that it doesn’t even bother me
Thanks Shaun! ❤
Happy to help! 😊👍
muito bom arthur!fico feliz a cada relato de recuperaçao! My symptons are fading, im back to work, but i still struggle with the physical symptons like heart palps, difficult breathing and gut issues...its hard to ignore those, but theres only one way out of this and you said it: just live your life as if you had nothing ,and thats what i trying to do, exposing to fears , working towards a life that i want to live
that's great!! everyday it gets easier ❤ saudações tricolores!!
@@arthurseto9484fala Arthur, será q pode me ajudar respondendo algumas coisas sobre a recuperação? Tem algum meio de contato se puder me ajudar?
@@arthurseto9484fala Arthur, tem algum meio de contato pra falar comigo? Caso possa me ajudar na recuperação da DP?
**READ THIS**
(I’ve recovered)
Quick back story.. I’ve had DPDR 3 times. First and second episode lasted 8 months and the last episode (the absolute worst) lasted a year. I was at the absolute rock bottom of mental health I mean I didn’t kno the depths could go so low. I’ve never had depression despite all the death and bad stuff I’ve had happen in my life but dpdr created depression. Believe me, every thought u had.. I had!
Symptoms .. on my journey I noticed many videos didn’t mention all the symptoms I had so I was thinking am I special? Do I have a type that don’t go away so I’m gonna run through the symptoms I had to ease your brain
•existential thought (crippling!)
•eye floaters
•intrusive thoughts(crippling!!)
•suicidal thoughts
•hopelessness
•thinking I had everything under the sun
•video feeling
•thinking I was in third person like call of duty
•and many more
•not recognizing family, friends
•thinking the worst case scenario of everything u can imagine
•
All the advice you hear is true I promise you, go on long walks, put ur earphones in and walk to a part of your neighborhood you haven’t been before stay active! I would go bed at 11pm every night and get out of bed at 1-2pm day time and it was sad because I’m an out going person. My passion was music and I didn’t go that for months because I had sensory sensitivity from sounds. What go me to recover? My second love is cars. I purchased a cheap cheap car and started a project on it and it gave me a little something to look forward to even if it was a tiny thing to look forward to. Can you recover completely? Hell YES!! You’ll see small improvements everyday. Is it true when you recover you leave all this shit behind and never research again? You sure do. If anyof you need help comment on this post and I’ll give you my Instagram and we can talk until you’re bored. I’m here to help💯💯 the fact I’m even writing this is mind blowing to me because back when I had dpdr I NEVER thought I would be at this point. Good luck everyone!!
Did u get it by weed
Great advice ❤
I stopped my workout routines for a while when I was in my most critical days. But I'm glad that I'm closer to nature again, taking long walks, riding my bike, swimming... it's hard at first, but then it gets really calming ❤
Help me bro ❤
@@Userr368 Yh I got it from weed every episode (3)
I've got Aspergers Syndrome, Anxiety, OCD, Psychotic Disorder - NOS, Tobacco Use Disorder. it's not easy at all to have autism and psychosis at the same time and be able to indirectly communicate this unless these are social workers, close family members.
Lieber Shaun, ich habe dein Buch gelesen, jedes Video geschaut. 11 Monate habe ich nun die DPDR. Es ist einfach so anstrengend und jeder hier erzählt dass es nur wenige Monate gedauert hat.
Ich arbeite, treibe Sport, tue viele positive Dinge. Ich stelle weiterhin alles in Frage, vor allem existenzielle Gedanken.
Ich frage mich jeden Tag was ich eigentlich bin und wie ich mich normal gefühlt habe.
Как ваши дела сейчас ?
Shaun i dont feel dp trought the day i can now feel like i used to feel trought the day , but i feel it only at nigh is this some ptsd or wtf idk anymore
I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't research anything about DPDR except on your channel, website, or book, but I haven't found much about uncontrollable thoughts. I'm already recovering; it's been a long time since I've had a panic attack, but sometimes thoughts like these come to my mind:
Why did I just do that? Why am I thinking about this? How can I think all of this at once? How many lines of thought am I having right now?
And this scares me too much. What could this be? How can I control it?
Don’t worry, existential / intrusive thoughts like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating and frightening but they are also temporary and harmless and will fade away and stop as your recovery continues 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-fears-and-anxious-thoughts/
@@Dpmanual Tkss!!!!
@@samuelrodrigues8120 Happy to help 😊
@@samuelrodrigues8120we meet again sam
I have alienation with my head😔i cant stay alone because this dp come back. I am 14 years. Its so hard for me because i feel like i am alienation with my head. Does it dp?
I for years didn't understand why something like that was illegal in first place although, although i could continue smoking after psychosis without getting secondary but it became a psychotic condition when over prescription of anti depressants very likely interacted with cannabinoids. i did have panic attacks involving dissociations , i don't have DP but it's scary to feel detached or clouded or even the unpredictable highs caused with too much THC without other cannabinoids.
I want to feel genuine joy and excitement again. I want to feel genuine sorrow and sadness again. I want to feel anger again. I want to feel connected to the world again. I want my sense of humor back, I want to be opinionated again, I want to know what I like, dislike, and feel neutral about again. I want to feel connected and empathy with other people again. I want to be able to not see basic human behavior and actions as somehow foreign or strange. I don’t want to feel like I’m desensitized to the things that normally would make me upset, angry, or worried. I want to daydream and think up amazing stories and connect to characters again. I want to feel that genuine intensity again. I want my confidence back. I want to worry about real life problems again. I want to feel genuinely connected to my interests again instead of feeling so blank to them. I want to be able to perk up and be like “I like that!” I want to be able to get engrossed in my hobbies again. I want to get hyped up and excited for video game trailers or movies again. I want to be sentimental again. I want to just laugh at the stupid memes my friends send me again. I want to feel like I’m part of a fandom community again. I want to be able to think up hypotheticals and what if stories and have other deep thoughts without the existential dread part again. I want to be able to compartmentalize how different things make me feel, regarding death and violence and stuff like that. I want my confidence back. I want to feel like I was growing as a person. I want to be able to obsess over things that I genuinely love and enjoy. I want to be the person I know that I am inside. I want to be able to infodump about my special interests, or just random things in general. I want to be able to go to work every day with happiness and confidence. I want to feel normal again. I don’t want to be perfect, I just want to be normal. I want to get bored of stuff because I’m genuinely bored with it instead of because of this feeling of disconnection. I want to get tired and say “I don’t want to do this right now” and feel real about it. I want to learn new skills at my job, and gain more confidence. I want to want to do things again. I want to be able to read a comic, play a video game, watch a video, read and article, collect stuff, draw, make up stories in my head, plan things out, and just… live my life.
Where do I even begin? What do I do? I’ve been in this place before but that was 3 years ago, and I don’t really remember what it was that I did or how I ended up recovering. I do know it involved distracting myself with my interests, but I have such bad anhedonia that even trying to engage with my interests just gives me even more anxiety. I’m worried that some of my big interests will fade if I don’t keep interacting with them.
I was almost recovered, months without thinking about it but all of a sudden it’s back and it somehow feels worse :( I’m so worried I can’t recover this time
Don't worry, temporary setbacks like that are very common on the road to recovery 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-does-depersonalization-recovery-feel-like/
And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.
@@Dpmanual why do I feel so hopeless even though I know it’s possible to recover? I feel I can’t do it this time.
Is the book available with you, friends?
Tmj, meu mano. Muito bom ver algo brasileiro.
TMJ! Saudações tricolores ❤️💚🤍
@@arthurseto9484parada chata, mas a gente chega lá. Passo isso há uns 5 meses já. Brabo demais
@@gabrielsantuche8183 CHATÍSSIMO, mano. Descobri até que um vizinho meu teve durante uns 4/5 meses tbm ano passado. Mas é aquele negócio de sempre. Depois de descobrir o que era, melhorou pra caramba! Espero que sua recuperação seja ótima tbm, man! Se precisar de algo, avisa noix! Abração!!
@@arthurseto9484 Boaa! Sou Brasileiro também, mano to começando a acreditar que isso não tem cura, to pirando de medo.
@@samuelrodrigues8120 fala, mano! fica tranquilo que é super comum. vc tá há bastante tempo com isso, cara?
HELP! Has someone ever had the feeling that your surrounding ist sometimes looking back at you ? Like you are frightened and for a little splitsecond of a moment you feel like your waterbottle is a threat and peeking at you for example ? Its really off setting 😞
Don’t worry, feelings like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating but they will fade away and stop as you recover 😊 www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/
I have a question, can ocd and dp/dr be connected?
dpdr is ocd
mine started 4 months ago and i followed ocd recovery tips and they worked form me.Now i just have random flair ups of thoughts now and then and they go away in minutes.
@@AC--13000 oh dang I didn’t know that
After you full recover dpdr.. can it come back?
Read this, I think you'll find it helpful 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/does-depersonalization-come-back/
I tried to k_ill myself yesterday but it didn’t work unfortunately .I am a girl 17 years old, I struggle for 3 months with thoughts and feeling that destroy my brain destroyed my hole life there is some voice coming from my head telling me all the day , everyday, every minute in my life that nothing is real nothing is real, the life not real not exist, my family is not exist they are not real , the people the humans not real not exist , my memories in my childhood is not real and I’ve always remembered them because they were beautiful , I look to my mom something tell me that this is all illusions she is not exist it’s all illusions from my mind I remember what happens yesterday like what I eat there is something deny everything I believed and with the time I started believe it and all my day start with a big argument with someone I don’t who it is but the only thing that I know that I lost my control the last week I put my hand in so so hot water to feel and to prove that I am exist and the life is real and I started cried because my hand was red because of painful , and after I struggled with the painful of the hot water those things comes again and told me that doesn’t happen you didn’t burned your hand it is not real you maybe imagine it it’s said that I am Laing it is all illusions nothing is happens nothing is real . When I looking to my sister and hugging her there is something forced me to believe that my sister is not real I really get tired of everything even the last month I met my old teacher that I’ve been always took him as role model those things comes again and told me that the teacher is not real your memories not real there is no life you’re just imagine or they are just illusions and they are not real please someone helps me I don’t even know if I’ll not k_illing myself because I lost my control when I look to the sky and the sun there is something told me it is not true and I really started believe it even now I try to ask help from you there is something that told me it not gonna work you will never be ok because nothing is real nothing it is gonna happen because nothing is exist and I tried to response those thoughts that maybe my mom my family that I loved them all my life maybe they are real maybe they are not but it’s gets worse please someone help me and tell me what is happening with me before I hurt myself . And the thing that I didn’t get a drug or something but before that happened I have been struggle with anxiety about the feature and I’ve been struggle with overthinking and depression and then just a thought and feeling come told me everything is not real I am not real and exist the hole life my brothers the movies the tv series there was something deny everything and my family will never let me go to psychologist
Is it normal to be stuck in this dpdr thing even if i don t have panick attacks anymore?
Yes do u have vission problems at night
@@Userr368 Yea i have especially at night i see more darker.. but my vision is good.. i mean i don t see things blurred.. i only see the things darker in the night. Or when i am outside and i come back in the house and it s dark inside.. i see lights where it s darker.. but now i feel better i i started to don t care anymore and i can feel again my body.. I feel so much connected to my body and in only 2 days, what you need to do.. is not focus on this shit.. i mean i don t focus anymore on this i have attetion and i feel so much better.. But i don t really know if i have sometimes dpdr beacuse sometimes i feel connected to my body but i have this visual symptoms :)))
@@Userr368 For example now.. i don fucus on this and i feel more connected but i feel heavy.. idk.. but it was so bad i felt so soft now 3 days ago..
@@rlsstudio2305 same with me when it starts to get dark and when its dark it gets darker like i remember i had that only when i was high. And when i come home where are lights i again feel 90% normal . I usualy forget abt it when im driving with my friend in car but when im walking i feel it and its hard to ignore it. And maybe first 5 mins of the night i feel normal
@@Userr368But what are you symptoms when it s darker? i mean do you see things or idk
Did u smoke agin after
Read this, I think you'll find it useful 😊www.dpmanual.com/articles/weed-after-depersonalization/
After you recover can it come back?
i had a few setbacks after I recovered. but the good things is that I already had the tools to deal with it, so i never had a setback that lasted for more than a day. i heard about people having for a little longer, but the main thing is that you never have a setback that makes your progress disappear 😀 a setback is just a setback - you may need sometime on your own and that's ok. you'll be better in no time!
@@arthurseto9484did u try smoking again if u got it from
weed?
@@arthurseto9484you used the program and it helped to overcome ?
@@arthurseto9484Hi! I feel sometimes like i’m better than before but is stil that feeling like u are dreaming or not fully yourself and i still have blurry vision but not like before now i’m more busy and i don’t think for dp/dr as before . Is normal that recovery is so sloww?
@diartahazrolli9411 hello! I'm sure that Shaun will have his takes on this one, but as far as I'm concerned, yes! I've seen people struggling a little longer with it. My recovery was relatively fast. But I think the main point is the start. No matter how long you dealt with it or how long it lasts, it always gets better as long as you keep a good attitude when facing these symptoms. It will get better and better, until you completely forget about it. If I could give an advice would be to get educated about it and, when you feel like letting go and ready to face your normal routines (tiny steps at first, of course), abandon all the sources about anxiety. It will only make you think of anxiety. It's hard at first, but you'll notice 5 minutes of complete recovery, as if you didn't think about it - it then becomes an hour, a day and so on and so forth. I can't remember the last time that I woke up thinking if I was better or worse. I just wake up and go to the gym, have a walk, ride my bike, etc. Sometimes I still think about DPDR, but I guess as if it was a memory. Then, I start to engage with anything again and forget completely. Small steps at first! And don't mind the setbacks. You will never lose your progress 😄
Would you disagree with a marijuana legalization that it was done in a way that got people with DR PR , although i never had that but i have a history of psychosis and a prediposition to psychosis, the highs themselves from high potency products felt awful loopy and scary i came down but the memories aren't pleasant given the effects were unpredictable in unpleasant way that weren't pleasurable or something that i wanted to feel, and it varied from strain to strain, i agree with absolutely removing the burden from criminal justice system on those who use but what happens now when we get cases like this? is it possible that they always existed but were under reported and when the marijuana became legal, did something that existed before become more reported since people felt they could talk about it? In what way do you see? I don't disagree or agree with anything really that is permitted by the law, i see many things within shades of grey, happened to me over smoking half a joint in the netherlands and i developed a mini DP in which felt like time loops were flash backing to me but only a few seconds, and over time my condition started to detoriorate, didn't sleep a week, and ended up with a mixed diagnosis of anti depressant over prescription with presence of THC in my blood system, which was Cannabinoid Psychotic Symptoms (MIXED), was confusing, i didn't know what psychosis is until i was taught by a psychiatrist about a diagnosis.
So I’ve had dp before, and I fully recovered. That was when I was 14 dealing with hormone changes. Now I’m 16. This Easter break my cousin and I got together. He wanted me to hit his weed pen (cart), so I did. About 6 puffs later and we were both higher than heck. We went to bed high. Next morning still felt high. This was Saturday. He convinced me to take an edible( forgot the potency). This was a capsule edible where the weed was inside. I knew there was no way I could swallow the pill whole because it was too big so I broke it in half and swallowed both down between like a 2 hour radius. About an hour later I could hardly walk or communicate. If somebody talked I sometimes wouldn’t answer. We were both out of it. Crazy thing is he convinced me to hit the cart again that night. Sunday came and we didn’t smoke but all through Easter dinner and church I was feeling crazy. Not as crazy as the day before but still. So we drive home that night. Still feeling dream like. Now it is 3 nights later and I am still feeling dream like. My personality has shifted to where I’m way more confident socially. In just these last few days. I still feel completely out of it. Dizzy when I look around. When my parents talk to me I feel to zoned out. I am panicking a little. I have a terrible family history of schizophrenia and weed abuse that caused my uncle to take his life just due to weed. Also had a aunt with it. I can understand if the symptoms where like when I had it before but they are not. I feel so disconnected. My personality has changed drastically. Last night when I went to bed I was so dizzy. I would be nice to get your knowledge on what to do next. Thanks.
hey, man! i'm really sorry to hear it. i'm sure Shaun has lots and lots of content about it! i recommend talking directly to him. if i can give you some advice is to first talk to your parents and a psichologist (if you find anyone specialized in anxiety, even better!). there's a GREAT video of Shaun explaining what is DP/DR which I'll send a link in the next message. If you find that your symptoms are the ones or some of what he explains, great, you got a starting point :) i'm not a medical professional, but i relate a lot with what you explained about feeling "dreamy" and thinking that I was going crazy. if it's really the case, the information that helped me the most is that it's just an anxiety related symptom - no more, no less. it's your brain acting as a fight or flight mechanism in which you're supposed to feel that way in front of a threat - but it's just happening at the wrong time (the threat here is the anxiety itself, the feeling that you're going crazy but that's not true). as soon as the anxiety starts wearing off, so will the dp/dr symptoms. i wish you a great recovery, man!
ruclips.net/video/h7u59TkQTxY/видео.html
Feel relieved after reading this thank you
@Fredrick-fn3vy great, man! After reading/watching some videos about it, try letting it go. If you're anxious, you are anxious and that's OK :) I remember feeling pretty quiet for a while (because I was way too worried with the racing thoughts in my head). It bothered me a lot at first, but I started feeling OK by not feeling OK sometimes. It seems so simple, but it's good to hear it from time to time. The outgoing and confident you is still there 😄 have a great recovery, man!
@@arthurseto9484hello man did u recovered?