In my locality... I have seen that most of parents are eager to spend 20-30 lacs of dowry BT they will hesitate in spending even 20k to their girl's education.
So true yr .... even they start searching groom while girl is still in college .. then( if the girl does not getting any govt job) when the girl pleads, they give 1 year limit to get a very well paying job or govt job, then start marriage preparation ....
True, most of them are afraid bcoz of unemployment rates in India. So many people with Master and MBA are applying for sewerage cleaner job in India. Halat bhot khrab hai. Ye to phir thek ma bap hai. Kuch ksai ma bap to betiyo ko paida hi nai hone dete. Agar paida hojae to turant mardete hai. 😢
My brother got married last year , we didn't asked for any dowry and that caused a chain effecty, the next 6 out of 8 marriages in our society there was no dowry. It starts with one person not asking for dowry and the rest of the relatives will follow. That's how India works sometimes.
Yeah I agree with u Becoz most of the time what happens is "tere chacha ke bete ki shaadi m dahej aaya tha hum bhi lenge" so first we should change ourselves n then think to make changes into society👍👍
All of these theories ignore the fact that a huge chunk of our society considers dowry and big fat indian weddings as a matter of pride, a status symbol. It is probably difficult to capture it in the data, but it is too important a factor to ignore.
it is the main reason, and it is mostly due to women who want their weddings bigger and better than their relatives, cousin, neighbour and so on. Add bollywood to that who constantly enforcing the idea as well.
@@nikhilkay1 Yes. In fact, I have seen it happen both ways, on demands of the groom or his family and also because the bride or her family wanted to do so themselves.
@@nikhilkay1 well from where I am , there was not even a ceremony like "engagement" but suddenly a chain like system started , recently my relative's marriage date was about to get fixed but then the groom's family suddenly stated to have an engagement, my relative got confused, as it was an arranged marriage the groom's family said 'it is not fixed if there is not an engagement' , so they had to do a ceremony
@@lonelyfireflies1426 add bachelor's party and bachelorette party to all the endless ceremonies already. You will be happier if you invested all that money in bitcoin. Complete waste of money, time. I wanted to have a simpler wedding but bride party requested to have all the "taam jhaam"
A guy doesn't marry unless he is financially independent. Let girls study and be financially independent just like men. And then let the marriage be for love and companionship rather than a stupid business deal that revolves around money, gold and display of social status.
Someday you will realize that marriage is also a financial decision. That's why in advanced economies you have the scope for prenuptial agreements. Nevertheless, it all comes down to what each partner brings to the table. the value one can bring can be any combination of earning, wealth, education, social status, age, looks/physical attributes, and anything else that other people find of value. And that's marriage for you, cut and dried.
I agree with wat you said, but it's just practical world made us see harsh truths at times, most potential suitable partner one can have may be will be married off to another women who're bringing wealth with them either through dowry or by wat they earn, n the girl Taking time to settle financially maybe it's a little late in terms of societal norms that now she has to compromise on her choices bcoz she's not left with much options she has already crossed that suitable age where she could find the best potential mate... And I guess no family wants that so they choose to spare money n give dowry considering they're doing best for their daughter at right time
@@ayushigoel9009 Who decides this " suitable" age? Society is fcked up..a bunch of old fashioned people takes major decisions..what if the the sudden rush marriage becomes a failure and the partners are not compatible??? The mindset of soxiet should change. There is no suitable age...love happens organically and it's when one should get married..
In my village a woman was burnt alive just because the girls family did not give a bike (dowry) to the boys family and this case was also not reported.
My parents are happy in this case , They didn't give and can't take dowry My brother in law refused to take dowry And me being unemployed and useless, it's uncertain if I m ever getting married 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Women doing house work are seen as repressed or some kind of torture.. Many men would be happy doing house work (which they can complete in 2-3 hours) and then could spend whole day watching netflix, playing pubg, house party with friends.. But thing is a high earning women would never marry a jobless which is opposite for men..😀 😀
I am gonna tell you a story. My parents got their union through love marriage. So, naturally no dowry was involved. In fact the marriage is intercast. Now, as I venture out with the same ideology (I despise dowry. It’s basically selling myself for god’s sake), I have seen girls whose families were apprehensive BECAUSE I didn’t ask for dowry. People automatically assume that I am lacking something. Weird.
Don't settle for them!!Rather,in my society it's the other way round that if the girl's family is willing to give more money than the guy deserves, they're trying to "compensate" for the girl
@@nitishamehta9337 he never said it. And untouchability can only be abolished by abolishing Hinduism. In inter caste marriages the taboo and hatred against groom/bride who is from so called Lower caste dosent fade and it eventually results in honour killing, domestic violence or separation. I'm not justifying caste bsed marriages but person from lower caste background do suffer in inter caste marriage setup in majority of cases
My mother says ,she will not gv anything in the name of dowry to the man we will marry.When relatives asked , who will marry ur daughters then,, she answered - the man with dignity.
I know a person who got rank 7 in CSE and became SDM. In next 1 year he got married in a 5 star hotel and got more than 50 lakhs as dowry through various means. If such an educated person cannot convince his family regarding dowry god knows who will. People say i am not practical enough but they took dowry in their marriage. I say i am okay being less practical but i am not going accept dowry. 😂 God bless Indian society.
The guy u are talking about himself wants money in the form of dowry. Next he will take bribe for any work he will do. These so called SDMs are most currupt species. Their first bribe is in the form of dowry. The why he will convince his parents for no dowry
Being from Gujjar community , I couldn't agree more to this. Here crores of rupees are spent on wedding ,furniture luxury cars and if that's not enough they will also give cash . Honestly , I don't want to marry a guy who is materialistic. This really inspires me to become financially independent . If I really want to spend my life with someone , it would be someone who loves and respects me otherwise I'm happy :)
Darn it same dude , I am happy individual way actually in today's generation the present millennials are actually thinking about late marriage or no marriage or totally going alternate forms of relationships.
@Wallah Habibi I am sorry but taking dowry an over all option be justified no , I won't support single penny to be given unless needed I am making relationship not business n according to women having high paid hubbies it's on their own most of these are the same woman who regret marrying a rich guy because a rich guy has options to leave as easy he came n as easily he can leave , if the rich man wants he can throw an amt of compensation and just wash off his duties from the woman , n that his absolute right unless the woman is herself rich than the stakes are woman won't like to take the compensation but she will demand half of his profits again business transactions no relationship happening here , I don't comply on marriage now I have seen my own parents case n I regret that I will even marry.
@Wallah Habibi Marriage is a business and it has become worse over time be it woman or man , marriage in david Attenborough case is just copulation human species but in an elaborate mateing rituals just to get offspring for other generation. Humans are as animal as an actual animal but they have sophisticated ways that's it.
"Groom quality", "Groom price" 😂😂, I love the way you brought down groom to mere commodity. I'm sure if we coin some more word like these in our daily life to describe such low lives, that graph will surely come down
For some parents, dowry is a kind of a proud statement in the society. That "they got their daughter married by giving 1 crore cash, a big bungalow, and a big car."
bhai dowry arrange marriages me krte h, aur arrange marriages(caste-based) me ladke ki value ladki se bahot zyada hoti h(generally) toh vo ladka kyu karega usse shaadi, maybe that's why dowry still exists..
@@aryakomal Im not against dowry. It is for my personal security just in case my wife ditch me in future and eat half my property as her compensation. alimony is just expensive and legal pro$titution.
I belong to Bihar. In my state, dowry is like a shit status game like someone got a big dowry they have good status in our society and some days ago, I have discussed on this topic with my father. It was like fight between us. 😂😂😂
I am also from bihar this is very true recently my cousin sister got married lot of money was given to the groom family dowry is a status game this is very ture.
Bhai.. Apna Bihar is next level thing in case of dowry... And it is so uniform all across the society, irrespective of religion and caste. No exceptions.
That's how it should start ..... everything which starts from grass root level is the more stronger ideology .....we the youth should start implementing in our house first and the chain follows
Well marriage is no longer a connection of two individuals. The concept is now too old. Now It is more of an risky agreement determined by compatibility which is accompanied with certain T&Cs. Why risky, because you have a lot to lose if the compatibility is lost.
Yes this is the true solution. This video suggests us that we need to increase "bride market price". Like bride is something like commodity with market price... Is this a solution or slave dealings?
Stop using people for- 1. Emotional comforting. 2. Boosting your self confidence. 3. Wiping off your tears. 4. Time Pass. 5. Bearing your expenses. Etc. Both men and women should stop doing such things.
My mother's cousin recently got married and she was a dentist so "naturally" her parents wanted her to marry a doctor and they ended up spending a lot of money on the wedding and "gifts" which weren't asked by the groom's family but they still did it because he was a doctor. The female's family is just as responsibile as the male's and sometimes more.
Yes, you are right.....many a times the bride's family gives dowry even when the groom's family did'nt demand.....actually during marriage many neighbours and relatives use to come and ask " ladke walo ko kya diya" and if they come to know that the bride's family has'nt given dowry they will say "kaise log hai ladki ko bina dahej vidah kar rahe hai"......the society sucks!!!
@@waleedrand7810 As much implemented and viraciously enjoyed. Non Muslims are left behind, though, in this race of Muslims. Translate Haram for the Muslims.
I like nothing about Indian wedding system. People waste money without thinking about upcoming time. Middle class even not hesitate to borrow money to complete wedding.
Marriage is just an excuse, money is the motivation. People want to lift their status, build contacts, acquire assets and swell bank balance through marriage. However educated we may become, greed won't go. Bride will soon face showers of taunts that she didn't bring dowry. Unless they opt for nuclear family after marriage, it can't be avoided. To be honest, love or arrange either way marriage is worthless if it doesn't bring gains to both parties. Be nuclear be happy.
@Biswamohan Mohanty this happens in western countries women have all the freedom and guess what divorce rates are more than 50% and about 80% of them are initiated by women. Due to arrange marriage mens get married and what happens when give all the freedom to women to whom to marry or to be in relationship with they all chases top 10 to 20% of the mens who are higher in status, money and famous. One more statistics in western countries about 10 to 20% of all the singles having sex with about 80 to 90% of the women and why because all the women are chasing them.
Well......my upper caste relatives didn't accept my lower caste wife.....they asked for 60% of her family wealth as gift....even our village priest told we r sin in our UP village where DAILTS and dowary killing and raping is common.. But my father didn't even care we had big wedding in Udaipur palace and reciption I'm UK and Singapore,my wife is hindu Singapore born of Indian origin. We r happy in Duabi,UK and marituitus and Singapore..... marituitus where 53% r Hindus there is no dowry or caste system there. I'm an atheist now just like my wife who left hindusim because even through she has Talent, kind,no arrogance,money to live and good education and work but she is treated every badly in UP village because her caste is lower. My parents who resettled in Bangalore and love happily there.....my brother married an Muslim an UK arab Muslim and lives in UK in my wife's home which her father gave to his only child. In our family of mothers side .....gold is given to bride in mariage so in future it will help her
@@diya1113 due to this reason Dalits and obcs are converting to Christianity, go and see ap, almost half of the state is Cristian, now they outnumber the Hindus.
@@arunroy9997 Same thing happened with my cousin. Him and his Upper Caste Girlfriend, Brahmin to be specific were in a relationship since Medical school, they loved each other more than anything but the Girls family wouldn't accept a Low Caste as their Son-in-law. My cousin had no flaws good looking, very tall, smart, Doctor, 6figures salary & belonged to a prosperous & respected family who lived in Greater Kailash (posh area) of Delhi. The Girl being from a Brahmin family & her father being a Priest who strongly believed in Caste system didn't help the matter. They (couple) struggled & resisted for 6 years for Love. After, they realized that these 2 won't budge they finally agreed to accept him as their Son-in-Law. Now it has been 3 years since they got married they have a Beautiful Son & daughter and live happily with the support & blessings of Both families. Recently, they moved to London too.
@Посейдон Афродита Дионис Yes.why not if the guy can promise that if she want to do her job even after having kids and that he will support her in household chores and care for their kids . Not every girl is same dude change your mentality .🙏
I am the oldest, a girl. When my mother was pregnant second time, My grandparent and aunts keep telling me . " God listens to little children, so Pray you have a brother. " When i ask why "Your father will be too much burdened if he has another girl, and a boy will look after them when old etc.. Now my parent live with me and husband, not my brother. I am the oldest, a girl. When my mother was pregnant second time, My grandparent and aunts keep telling me . " God listens to little children, so Pray you have a brother. " When i ask why "Your father will be too much burdened if he has another girl, and a boy will look after them when old etc.. Now my parent live with me and husband, not my brother. Edit 1: *what about your inlaws? ": My husband moved to big city many years before I met him. We continue to financialy support as he did before. His brother and family live with my in-laws in the village. They visit us, but they rarely stay long as they enjoy life in village. I take kids back every year. If I move to village how can he financially support them? So they haven't asked me to either. Edit 2: what aunts say now : No magic happened I suppose now they say " Poor man, he is unlucky he has to live with his daughter"
if we really want to end the dowry . Then its request for guys to avoid and straighly neglect his parents wish to get dowry from girl side. Why not tell them u won't marry if dowry would be case in marriage 😃 if no-one would be there to take it then it would end this practice .
If girls had a choice they would have rejected this a long time ago. If they say no they get beaten up or shunned by the society. It's the fear that keeps them silent
@@charu2774 Which is exactly why we need irreverent ( according to society) and fearless girls and even fearless guys that will break these so called traditional values and customs.
True Wedding business and matrimony business is huge Bachelor's party sangeet engagement etc Wedding industry is show off Both families want to show off
even my mom is saving money so that she could buy gold for my marraige.I often ask her to buy a piece of land with that money as a good source of investment but she refuses as she thinks without gold it's impossible for me to get married.this is the condition of our society.that's y I seriously need to be self independent asap.
True..in some cases I have also seen some guys rejecting dowry but the girls family insisting on giving dowr as according to them what will others say.. I think another issue is the big fat Indian weddings, where families put everything on the line..this also raises expectations for dowry
The Problem is when Burocrates like IAS, IPS, they demand dowry. What do you expect from the society. Jisko laws implementation karana hota hai, wo khud laws break krte hai. The solution is Privatisation.
Bhai Bihar me bahut ias ips bhare pade hai or . Recently mere hi pehchan k ek IAS officer ko 70 lakh dowry Mila and he demanded 90 lakh .or bohot Sare officer hai Bihar me jinka shadi 50, 65,40 lakh. Dowry m hota hai. Pura Bihar Ka economy is pe hi depend hai
@Spell Check Bhai mere taraph ek judge hai jiski Shaadi hui thi to ladki wali ne blank check de diya or bola ki Apne Mann se fill karlo and he filled somewhere close to 60 lakh. Jab IAS ips le rhe hai judge bhi le rha hai dahej to ki se expect kroge . Or ha living without marrying will be difficult for both male and female.😂😂 Isn't it?
@@tdxgamer5176 wow judge bhi yani wo judge Jo court me dowry lene walo ko jail ki saja deta hai wo khud dowry leta hai 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 us judge ko mai puchna chahunga ,"Your hounour ap khudko kitne sal ki jail doge?"
@AMAZING SPACE I asked your region in the other comment as dowrey is more prevalent in up and bihar and haryana as compared to west Bengal from where I am . So in India yes region can define your thought process. I asked your region because if you are from these regions then it is expected of your answer. And the people of up and bihar are generally backward in thinking so it is hopeless to argue
@Elleon Mor in case divorce ho jaye toh sayad aapko nahi pata, income ke according paise wife ko dene padte hain. Aur aap toh aise baat kar rahe ho jaise shadi ke baad husband apni kamayi se aur biwi apni baap ki paison se chalte hain.
In my case, we asked nothing. Infact we shared costs of wedding in half proportion (in my native area - satara, Maharashtra, the girls family bears the full cost). Her father had visited my newly built native home, and to my surprise, they gave electronics that were not there as a “gift” on the wedding day without asking!!
@@nitishamehta9337 Nahi. I don’t stay at native. So those gifts are actually useless to me. In my Mumbai home, I have everything! They (I am guessing it’s her cousins) contributed and gave the electronics as gift 🤷🏻♀️
Giving a dowry isn't one isolated event. It sets the tone for the entire relationship between the families. It puts the bride's family on a lower footing than the groom's because they are literally paying someone to take their daughter off their hands. It gives the groom's family permission to be infinitely greedy. Why would they stop? They have the dowry and the girl, they have no reason not to ask for more. Say "NO" to that first demand. Walk away.
yes..indian parents especially of a girl are way to emotional. they will say they are giving gift not “dowry” only so that their daughter remains in a happy marriage
if we really want to end the dowry . Then its request for guys to avoid and straighly neglect his parents wish to get dowry from girl side. Why not tell them u won't marry if dowry would be case in marriage 😃 if no-one would be there to take it then it would end this practice .
I think increasing 'bride value' is the solution for this. Nowadays, from what I have observed around me, if the girl is just as qualified as the boy and earns almost equal as him, then her family doesn't pay dowry. But if the gap between their incomes is significant or if she's uneducated, then her family has to pay dowry.
The reason is simple the guy is educated to look after his wife by earning money and on the other hand girl is denied education so that the money can be given to the guy to look after the girl.. so all parents educate your children and make them independent 🙏
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
In 90s there was a huge spate of dowry driven domestic violence incidents where the husband and his parents would live the gas on overnight and send the woman(wife/daughter in law) to prepare morning tea. There would be fire and the woman would land up in government hospital with 3 degree burns and die. The family would pretend to mourn the accidental death and then remarry the male again. This was so rampant that Sudha Murthy, after a heart wrenching visual she met in a govt. Hospital, through her NGO donated several cooling containers to hospitals in order to place the victims in those horrifying last hours of their life before death rescued them from the monsters called hisband and in-laws.
The shocking part is even after being highly educated, both parties involved in the marriage don't seem to see what's wrong with this tradition. This dowry system is not only supported from the groom's side, but even the bride's side also considers this to show off of their wealth to the society.
This is so true. I've seen people argue that well-educated families with girls that have high paying jobs would never accept to marry a person who demands dowry, and this is just not true. Just because someone has a high paying job does not mean they have a progressive social mentality
@AMAZING SPACE you are correct but ajkal kya hota hai ye showing off culture hogaya hai,logo ke paas khane ko roti nahi lone le le ke shadi karte hai,just because society mei competition laga h
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@@pranjalthakur7532 Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@@shwetasharma6901 Well if it was equal, the groom should be given dowry too, either way it's wrong. Bdw I believe your theory also makes sense. Peace ✌️
@@pranjalthakur7532 Peace Bhen. I think you misunderstood or I miscommunicate but i want you to know that Both Families/Parties give Couples their Financials like Bride's Family give Jewelry(etc), Groom's Family give their Property. And I by not means suggest that Dowry in its current form is good.
I’m quite surprised that you included bride price . I’m from the northeast and we still find instances of bride price in many communities and in some it has just become something in name where you pay 15 or 11 rs as part of tradition . The only reason in most NE state dowry is not prevalent is due to bride price which we find in decline as many women are in workforce . On such example would be market places which in many other parts of the country is dominated by men while in the northeast it is primarily dominated by women .
Being from a jaat family, it's a matter of pride for our conservative family and relatives, I try so much to make them understand about this but there is no effect, now I don't do any effort to make them understand I just patiently study and I am sure I'll get a good job then I'll not practice it in my marriage atleast and also for my brother and the next generation of ours... small changes can bring big change to the society.... that's why I am doing a hardwork...
Finally... someone said. It is for pride in our society. They see pride not only in receiving dowry infact in giving dowry. And young generation or people like us will not get anything to say in this..
As a jaat girl, i support you and our other jaat sisters. Only a jaat girl can understand how much we are suppressed in our family. Not that other people don't, but since I'm jaat, i understand you precisely
@@medhakasture9545 they usually don't want equal they want more. If a earning girl sattle for a equally earning guy, good for them but usually that don't happen.
@@wellyesbutactuallyno9776 I mean I get it but if I am an ambitious woman I would want to get married to an ambitious guy too , like in the tech industry if the difference in the salary is 5-6 lakhs it doesn't really matter but yeah if a person who is working for 6 years and is still earning 4 lakhs there is some problem and I would not want to marry a problematic guy
A girl and her parents agreed to Pay Dowrey even in So called "Love" Marriages . 🤦 When I asked this both of them now don't talk to me calling it as their personal lives
So you have a problem with parents giving something to her daughter's family? Are you jealous that girl had a real marriage? And guess what, people like you are creepy, thus anyone would ghost you when you target them.
Dowry is not even an Indian tradition to begin with. It was brought to India by the colonial rulers. People still keep it anyway because its convenient.
if we really want to end the dowry . Then its request for guys to avoid and straighly neglect his parents wish to get dowry from girl side. Why not tell them u won't marry if dowry would be case in marriage 😃 if no-one would be there to take it then it would end this practice .
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha. Pls Stop Defaming India.
Nowadays it is double burden on girl's parents as the groom's parents expect educated housemaid for their sons. Girl's parents spend on daughter's education and also on dowry. In the end girl can't use both dowry money and her education
exactly. The groom's family wants a highly educated, but "docile and submissive girl" so that she can cook food all day for the family while simultaneously looking after the kids' education, so that way the groom can dust his hands off of all the childcare.
@@koushikkn127 Well, imo it depends. Would doing housework when one can listen to their favorite playlists when cleaning, cooking etc and relax afterwards be wayy better than a corporate job where your boss screams at you and you have to stare at a screen all day? Of course it would. (I'm not implying that you do this btw lol just giving an example for comparison's sake) But that is most often not the case for indian households. Women have to cook for the entire family, and most of the time a majority of their day goes into cooking, and all the other household work comes afterwards. Then comes looking after kids and all that stuff. Sprinkle some lack of respect and freedom onto that and boom you've got misery. Basically what I'm saying is that it's not solely household work which is the problem, it's more of an amalgamation of factors that come as a result of being a wife that does housework that causes issues.
Even our community demands for dowry like any other community. If a girl fails to bring dowry, her in laws taunt her almost all the time. I remember one of my friend told me about their relatives. This is the real story and it's still going on with that girl. So my friend's relatives selected one girl for their son and while deciding about wedding they told the bride parents that they need nothing from their end. Bride family member thought those people (groom parents) are humble. But once that girl got married they started taunting her all the time. My friend told me that they humiliate that girl in front of everyone. They taunts her like this (hamari bahu kuch nhi laayi, iske baap ne kuch nhi Diya etc). My question is why the hell they act like great humans when they are actually not? If you are low standard people, tell them straight away. Don't trouble, humiliate a girl in that way ...
@Spell Check yeah but in our country girls are pressurized to go through this shit. Because if they file a divorce. Next thing is they will be ill treated by her family members and on top of that men's will change they look that girl. And much more. Every one shows that they are against dowry,mental abuse and all and when someone gets a opportunity to remarry the divorced girl no one would come forward. Every one will support but when they get opportunity to act they will back off . And they put blame on their parents saying my parents won't agree and all. Men who marry those girls are gems which is very less in our country. So girl thinks all this and compromise with her conditions
I believe every girl should be independent so that they won't rely on their husbands even if he leaves her. As sir said in video that's the solution i believe. Coz i know one of relative who faced domestic violence. Her husband know that she is illiterate so can't do anything. Moreover he is confident that she won't leave him since she is illiterate and can't live survive without him. So the bottom line is making girl a independent is vital in this era.
@@syedkhadeer5348 but who will make the girl independent? Many of the parents don't do that. Education should be made free, basic necessities like seperate toilets in schools, colleges should be taken care of, the home and outside atmosphere should be made less sexist and toxic. Sex-ed, self-defense, humanity etc should be taught to everyone. These and many other things are to be taken care of.
My dad once told me that when he was getting married he told his dad to not ask for dowry from my mom's side. Grandpa told dad if that happens then the girls side would think something is off.. down there.. 😂 Kya hai re 😂😂
@Abhishek Singh boys don't want fair, slim, rich, good looking girl who can cook, give birth to a son, do all the household chores, look after in laws etc ??
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@@radhikathakur286 Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@Abhishek Singh Girls earning 70000 per month want a guy who earns 1 lakh per month at least. You can check in matrimonial sites. Now tell me who's marrying for money then ?
@@funkyderek9081 Sahi Kaha Brahman reservation judiciary main isiliye Aisi galat hai . Yahi to merit hai aise hi Nahi croro case pending hai India main . End Brahman reservation in judiciary
There is a difference between being educated and being civilized Just before you have college degree that does not make you the smartest guy and just because you are school dropper that doesn't make you illiterate
My grandma told me that neither she nor anybody in her village ever gave dowry and then told me in recent times it had become a practice and now every groom in our village wants dowry 😒😒😒
@อาร์ทิมิส อะโฟรไดท์ ไดโอนีซอส ซุส เฮร่า อพอลโล โพไซดอน lol its a village still people do only agricultural stuff those who went to the cities acquired jobs never came back situation are same but still these men want dowry
@อาร์ทิมิส อะโฟรไดท์ ไดโอนีซอส ซุส เฮร่า อพอลโล โพไซดอน so u are type of the person who says money doesn't matter 😂. Many people do not let their daughter in law work so she depends financially on husband so wanting a well off isn't bad tbh.
@@hitankshee5131 well u r a bit right but in village area if u see mostly every men and women do agricultural stuff even my grandma or any women in the village can stay there alone and survive they all got the knowledge and skill but then they got exposed to this dowry bullshit and now everyone wants dowry, due to increase in population land has been divided a lot and many people acquire very less land its not that they are even rich but they still want dowry
Recent proposal to increase the women mairrage barr from 18 to 21 will hopefully be helpful... As women gets opportunity to educate themselves in higher studies... But i feel it eould had been better if it was 23/24 as they even have started earning and tasted financial freedom...
Exactly, there’d be way less cases of financial & housing demands made to men and also the demands of dowry & compensation made to women , if the age was 22-24.
@@milanshsharma1267 why... Whats wrong if they are married at age of 25(21 is too early)... They have financial freedom hence can marry or divorce ... Giving power to the girl...
marriages in India are not about love and connection between tow families But a trade business where a groom is bought on his caste and income and a bride is sold at expense of here beauty and her families wealth and this tends to a unhappy marriage violence and sometimes murders sad but its reality may our generation bring change 🙌🤞🤞
Very well said... They don't seem to understand that love, understanding and compatibility is most important. Rather than how much money earned or how many property one has.
And what is the solution ? Even if you remove caste and dowry ,women will still marry for wealth and men for beauty snd it can also be vice versa. Just look at rich 80 year old men marrying 30 or 40 something women.
@@carymnuhgibrilsamadalnasud1222 Blasphemy, Burqa, 4 Bride marriages, Lack of Female Participation exists there, While India is acknowledging problems and trying to eliminate it, Pakistan on the other hand is in denial to acknowledge the regressiveness in its society under the garb of religion
I am a Bihari and I can totally relate from this. Now a days, groom family want everything things like a well earning girl, good amount of dowry and a lavished marriage. The sad part it in Bihar all expenses of marriage beared by Birde family only.
My sister, married 2 years ago. We spent lot of money on her wedding, and why not to? She is our beloved ❤️ her in laws Didn't demand for anything, but still we have everything we wanted. And it has been two years, still her mother in law taunts her, mocks her almost everyday that she didn't bring enough for them. This is not a secret disease, and you all know it.
can u tell me how much salary does your sister earn and her husband ? when there is gold digging for higher salary guy then no rule , laws or punishment and now you are speaking of taunting ..seriously stupid
@@deepseth7105 my sister is a gynecologist, and her husband is AE. And are you suggesting me that a man can demand anything just because he has good job? Seriously?? And do you have any idea through what women like my sister are going? Everyday, that mental torture... Surely you don't know. Because to you it seems stupid if someone would stand against your nonsense ideology. If a man wants only money, then he should not marry at all, let him earn money as much as he wants. Rather he literally sells himself for Dowery. How pathetic!
@@deepseth7105 I have a question so if a woman earns more then you , will you b willing to get married to her and during marriage will you b willing to give money to her family, leave your parents , stay with her family and quit your job after marriage and stay back home and take care of her family ?
@@talksense6648 a gynaecologist lady will never marry a man who demands dowry and that also, she's marrying a man of same professional status. So please dont expose your lies. Underlying reason for marital problems could be something else and you people are playing victim card and spreading fake stories like this.
In odisha most of educated youth disagree to take dowery, and most of the dowery is very low upto 1 lakhs in average upper middile family. But many changes also may done to make it better
MEHR CULTURE ➡you didn't speak anything about muslim wedding culture where the culture of mehr is prevalent. What is meher? ➡a cash or anything suppose to given to girls at the time of their marriage. ➡If dowry culture is regressive then how is meher progressive? Don't come with ur logic that women leave their family and all, most of the couples are going nuclear nowdays and leaving their parents in old age homes. You spoke abt how dowry isn't only india's problem and was a culture in west too, so let me tell u about iranian culture. In iran if a man fails to pay dowry to his wife then he has to face imprisonment. 📌FALSE DOWRY CASE. ➡how can you skip this part while discussing dowry. It is a basic common sense that no woman would file dowry case against her husband if the marriage is running succesfully. ➡most of the dowry cases are filed in divorce battles to harass husband and his family. Since there is no punishment for filing false dowry cases, it's mostly suggested by lawyers to women to file dowry case. In BANGLADESH a woman can land up in jail for filing false dowry case. NISHA SHARMA CASE ➡Edit The Nisha Sharma dowry case was an anti-dowry lawsuit in India that represented how IPC 498A law can be misused. It began in 2003 when Nisha Sharma accused her prospective groom, Munish Dalal, of demanding dowry.[1] The case got much coverage from Indian and international media.[2][3][4] Nisha Sharma was portrayed as a youth icon and a role model for other women.[5] The case ended in 2012, after the court acquitted all accused.[1] The court found that she had fabricated the dowry charges to wriggle out of the wedding.[6] @deepikanarayanbhardwaj has posted a video on youtube today abt a man who is accused of dowry and is being harassed by wife's family. And there is demand of 50lacs to withdraw the case. 📌JWELLERY DEMAND BY BRIDE ➡there have been many cases where women refuse to marry the man if he brings less jewellery. Most of the cases i have seen are from uttarpradesh and in these type of cases the victim is a boy so english media rarely speaks abt it. You can search this two words to see the cases on google➡ जेवर शादी Indian laws-in case of divorce the jewlleries given to the woman in duration of marriage will remain with her only and the gifts recieved by the man will be taken back. 📌ALIMONY ➡dowry is illegal while working women demanding alimony is legal. Famous women who demanded alimony-malaila arora, karishma kapoor, susain khan and the recent case is from karan mehra's wife nisha Most of the verified feminist pages support alimony even if the wife is working and can sustain herself ➡no woman faces imprisonment for not paying dowry but there are thousands of men in prison who fails to pay alimony, i saw a case where man was in jail For not paying maintenance and died. Some misandrist judgements ➡punjab and haryana high court-beg borrow or steal but pay your wife ➡working wife is not a ground to deny maintenance ➡it is man's duty to provide for his family even if he's disabled. Judgements when men demand alimony👇 ➡if men will start demanding maintenance it will promote idleness in society. Solution for dowry-do u think a woman who's earning 15 lakh per annum will pay dowry? No she won't, it's incompetent woman's father who pay dowry so that their daughters get married to a rich man to continue the luxury she was getting in her father's home. Start marrying women with men who earns as equal as her. If your daughter can't continue the luxury better don't marry her by offering dowry. 📌some women and men say that if a woman wants to marry a rich man for securing her future , it's not wrong. ➡Tell me the same way if a man wants to secure his future by taking dowry how is it wrong? They-no man is murdered for govt job and properties. Fact-there are 1000s of cases where women killed their husbands for properties and cash. Google will help you. The sole reason behind this murders was man's property.
@Ranjan Mall Try to marry a girl with job then even girl's parents will start educating kids for sake of "marriage". If both are earning or even if she is earning then I assume she will be working at home, taking care of you and kids so that is unpaid work too.
@Ranjan Mall yes paid or unpaid work it counts. Women are bringing this to table so obviously they don't need to give dowry to groom's side. Hope you understand my point
Yeah really. Irony is that in Islam it opposite, the Groom gives 'Mahr' to the bride. And Dowry thing is cursed. Sadly, muslims of north India are too much influenced by culture of the land and their customs.
This guy's talk reminds of me of a medical student who was asked in an medical studies exam: "What are the reasons for the sudden pause in a woman's period?". The student listed many reasons but omitted the obvious one: "she got pregnant". The obvious reason for why dowry is present: It is simply due to the law of demand and supply in the arranged marriage market of India. Eligible high-earning grooms are in high demand and short supply and therefore they can take advantage of this market stituation and demand high prices. Are the grooms greedy? Yes. They want the free money.
Journalist ravish Kumar once said " Aap desh ke liye Kuch na Kar paaye tho at least Shaadi ke waqt dhahejh mat lo" it's great service for the country in itself. I suddenly remembered that.
I'm from jharkhand lower middle class family I'm now 20 still my mom getting less respect than my aunty because my aunty had given dowry and my mom did not. She cries every single day but anyhow she managed to learn tailoring and now I am doing engineering in govt. engineering college because of my mom.I love my mom.I will not take dowry in my marrige.I hope we will end up this worst tradition like sati.
@@pikachuthunderbolt3919 I mean you can basically do not need to do half the work, collect bribes and get other provisions why would anyone want to have a dream like APJ Kalam sir said, when you can just make money like this.
If you have sister/female friend just ask her to study and be independent if you do not have money then you have to bend to the will of those who have money.
I am a doctor. My two senior from Rajasthan and Aasam was debating with me about dowry system. I am literally shocked to see how desparate they are to get the dowry.
@@aishwarya2130 those would be paid by other doctor family parents for a doctor groom, you want you pay. Or the best is earn as same as your partner and pay just 0 dowry.
I don't believe that educating a girl solves the dowry issue the way they say it, rather the groom might feel intimidated by a great woman and go for someone else. But if someone is highly educated, they should be allowed to find their own partner and that will work better than arranged marriage. A girl doesn't have to marry nor does a boy, just let them be and let they experience the beauty of life. Don't bind them in your shit.
In Meghalaya, according to Khasi Tribe the boy's family gives dowry to the girl's family which is opposite to what we see in UP, Bihar and South India.
It's funny to see people justifying dowry with ''even girl's parents want rich guys". Bro in my community and almost other cultures, rich guys marry without any dowry.
@@lakshyapaliwal4548 what I meant was, to someone like me who comes from culture with no concept of dowry,it seems ridiculous. Whether a guy is a peon or an IAS officer no one takes dowry in my culture. Rich guy might get a prettier or better statured girl but no 💰 or ' gifts' from in-laws lol.
I am a bengali and in bengalis dowry is almost sort of prohibited. Infact the grooms family gets defamed in society if they as for dowry. We value education and career for both men and women. Proud to be a bengali!
@THE ZOLDICS By your sense of knowledge i feel like you are liability to your family as well as society. And bengali men are handsome , good looking and powerful. I think you need to have some knowledge and insight before you utter bs in any platform.
Education in it's current terms doesn't seem to be helping in changing the mindset. Since 1930's education level has increased and so as dowry so clearly education isn't doing what it is supposed to do. What we need is to impart value education & morality.
True, educational degrees are not equivalent of logical thinking or rationalism of individuals, it just means few more years in college What is needed is independent thinking and having idea of basic moral philosophy. But since our education system focus more on memorising facts than thinking from a rational point of view, we cannot expect anything from formal education in creating social changes Independent thinking, self esteem/respect for one's own thoughts/opinions and basic humility/modesty is very important otherwise we can easily be drowned by societal "mob mentality" which is unfortunately due to fact the most people are very insecure chasing idea of "respect" in material possession or "perceived power" in society without adding any value to society. We can change others' mind only when we understand why someone is thinking in a particular way. Then respectfully or intelligently communicating our ideas with strong logical reasoning is helpful (prioritizing on not to think about others' thinking on our morally right decision making) . If someone thinks he is educated he should also know how to change other ignorant minds without succumbing to societal norms or anyone's pressure.
@AJ B No india is not exception or something. The fact is western educational system is best for the west. Not for Us. We are forced to be in a transition state because of the type of education we are getting. once we get fully westernised, these evils will not be there. Or we need gurukuls. not some british education crap that only produces clerks.
@@madhavireddy1792 there are many factors why Indian graduates behave that way One of them is ofc that our schools are merely a factory for future employees. No emphasis is given on creativity or research. Second is lack of individualism- majority Indians even if they wanted to, don't take risks because we are emotionally and financially connected with our family and relatives. Third is- our economic development most Indians are first generation graduate working in a high paying job for the first time. So their immediate priority goes on to earn back the money spent in education. 4th is our very unstable economic system- owing to which getting a minimum wage job outside of extraordinary skillset is very tough . So even if u wanna take risk, start a business or startup: u hv nothing to fall back on, ur parents are dependent on you and the market is very saturated.
Even before that. My parents and aunts also married without dowry. In our generation I doubt any Bengali woman would agree to marry a guy who asks dowry
@@SK-uq3hr Most of the bengali women these days are actually working. Further there is a complete different scenario in Bengal as most of the marriages are done within the same social status, so actually the groom stays convinced that the bride he is getting married will provide recurring returns for him and his family.
I still remember this when my Social sir asked us in my 7th class that who all will not take dowry raise your hand I proudly raised my hand at that time & I am 23 yrs now Single & I still abide by that 💓
Mentality of Indian family is rudimentary, One of my friend who has annual income of 8 lac after tax deduction had given matrimonial ad in newspaper with title "Poor family girl need no dowry, simole marriage" as he was socialist progressive ..... Not even a single family contacted him as potential bride families thought "Guy must be having some problems : physical, mental or economical
@@supreeths6006 It was in newspaper which cost 2 to 5 rs not in any matrimonial site ☺️ People have mentality that more groom ask dowry, more would ha e been his socio economic stature.
@@dilipsachan8669 yah girls always run after money if that was the case in our country then why do we need to provide education to girls? If they only go to rich guys
It works only if all men fight with their parents to stop dowry. What if he does that and avoids receiving dowry, but his family has to pay the same dowry for his own sister's marriage cos the guy on the other side didn't care about this? One reason why this can't happen in large scale might be : why would an average man fight his parents and support his would-be wife and her family? What affection does he have towards this new family he has never met or this new girl he hardy knows?
I am from a Village in U.P. Here, Mostly people are farmers, and did not earn that much money. People also did not show much interest in educating girls. But, one thing they are concern about is finding a groom for their daughters who has a government job. Some of the price tags of such grooms are; One who is in Indian Army; 20 lakh and a bullet bike+ A girl who should be as beautiful as Missworld. One who is in Indian Railways; 30 lakh One who is a Government Teacher; 50 Lakh.
Fk the law.... Of demanding dowry is illegal... Then demanding for a serviceman bride for an incompetent women should also be illegal... I mean look at this way a men go through so much struggle to be successful and the other hand women do nothing, they financially first depend upon his father and then his husband.... And after that they ask for rights and equality wth is equality, why men should be provider....
@@anonymous-dg5cn Yes thanku for saying that as a women it's so shameful how some Indians think like that. Women were not even allowed rights to education by their parents so that's why they had to be dependent on their significant others. First u don't give women the opportunity to get educated and earn then some men will complain about women being dependant on them. This is hypocrisy.
@@Klip_klop yes. Bro . You are right . But I was trying to say that taking and giving dowry (which is prohibited in India) is not even seen as a crime in India .
I'm from Jharkhand and I've seen a shift in the mindset of educated families. The females in my family who weren't educated enough got married to guys who were only slightly more formally educated, and gave dowry to their in-laws. However, the educated ones with jobs of their own got married to really intelligent/wise men, and dowry wasn't discussed even once. Weird that there can be so much differences within a single family, just on the basis of education and women empowerment.
Exactly and that's why I feel that's its high time when parents should start spending money on their daughters education and make them independent rather than saving the capital for her marriage.
In Jharkhand tribal culture there was the culture of reverse dowry (bride price which was price equal to 2 oxes) which has feded away now.. now only the parents and relatives gives household items as gifts for the bride for security if the bride will have a nuclear family in future.
2 points - 1. earning is not a function of intelligence but stream of work. 2. "Education" doesn't exist in India, only skill development. 99.9% Indians don't know what's education.
I am a guy from northern Kerala. I am from a family which follows matriarch to the point that kids carry mother's surname and women don't change names post marriage. Our men know our value and have great deal of self respect. We don't ask for money for marriage either
In all the marriages I have seen furniture and gold is given by bride's family and people judging how much costly they have given. So dowry is matter of pride!
@iTs Messiah just tell groom that we will provide property to girl then look nobody will ask for dowary. I also have one question for u sir while marrying ur daughter or sister do u look at finacial background of groom ?
okay so, I found this channel yesterday and now I am in love with it. I get a bundle of case studies, unpopular research and the researchers, events, social conditions, terminologies, data, surveys, problems with solutions, EVERYTHING. Thankyou so much. This is not only general awareness but a bundle of knowledge about the recent happenings and their past roots.
Reality is India is a money starved nation. When you get the chance for free money, you won't deny it. It takes some amount of financial security to be able to take a moral stand.
My sister's best friend committed Suicide by jumping from 10th floor of an apartment..her family had given rs 40 lakhs as dowry and a fortuner.. sadly the in laws and husband are roaming free having bail
I feel privileged for being a bengali girl now....because in urban West Bengal atleast (because idk abt rural parts) dowry is practically unheard of and pretty shameful practice. Credits to the liberal minded discussions that goes on in a middle class bengali household❤️
I was born and brought up in Rural Bengal and never heard of any dowry related incident in decades. My parents got married in 70s without any dowry. Nowadays even most Bengalees are fine with intercaste marriages.
I'm also from West Bengal and yes u are right...The marriage of my parents and my other family members ( like my mama or pisi or cousins ) got married with out any dowry .. it's really shameful for and unusual thing in Bengal.
I know Bengalis r liberal open minded Liberalism is the way to go No dowry Let people b people In Maharashtra also dowry is only given in terms of jewelry very less No dowry is given
In my locality... I have seen that most of parents are eager to spend 20-30 lacs of dowry BT they will hesitate in spending even 20k to their girl's education.
Wth 😑😑
So true yr .... even they start searching groom while girl is still in college .. then( if the girl does not getting any govt job) when the girl pleads, they give 1 year limit to get a very well paying job or govt job, then start marriage preparation ....
@@reenamohanta2994 yeah same is happening with me.
Now..thats a pity..
True, most of them are afraid bcoz of unemployment rates in India. So many people with Master and MBA are applying for sewerage cleaner job in India.
Halat bhot khrab hai.
Ye to phir thek ma bap hai. Kuch ksai ma bap to betiyo ko paida hi nai hone dete. Agar paida hojae to turant mardete hai.
😢
Still educated people want dowry..In terms of gifts 🙄.
Like u and me 🤣😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂
@Shruti Tripathy Yeh badhiya tha guru
Padhe-Likhe gawaarh
@Shruti Tripathy u r right....
Many even try to Justify it...my father is also among them😑
My brother got married last year , we didn't asked for any dowry and that caused a chain effecty, the next 6 out of 8 marriages in our society there was no dowry. It starts with one person not asking for dowry and the rest of the relatives will follow. That's how India works sometimes.
Yeah I agree with u Becoz most of the time what happens is "tere chacha ke bete ki shaadi m dahej aaya tha hum bhi lenge" so first we should change ourselves n then think to make changes into society👍👍
jab fake dowry aur dv case lagega toh pata chalega 😂💀
This is innovative-diffusion framework in action! Awesome ❤️
Muslims have a concept of Mehr, where you purchase women. Nikah itself means conjugal intercourse in Arabic!
Respect brother.
All of these theories ignore the fact that a huge chunk of our society considers dowry and big fat indian weddings as a matter of pride, a status symbol. It is probably difficult to capture it in the data, but it is too important a factor to ignore.
it is the main reason, and it is mostly due to women who want their weddings bigger and better than their relatives, cousin, neighbour and so on. Add bollywood to that who constantly enforcing the idea as well.
@@nikhilkay1 Yes. In fact, I have seen it happen both ways, on demands of the groom or his family and also because the bride or her family wanted to do so themselves.
Watch the documentary 'Matyrs of Marriage' Its a very good documentary on dowry
@@nikhilkay1 well from where I am , there was not even a ceremony like "engagement" but suddenly a chain like system started , recently my relative's marriage date was about to get fixed but then the groom's family suddenly stated to have an engagement, my relative got confused, as it was an arranged marriage the groom's family said 'it is not fixed if there is not an engagement' , so they had to do a ceremony
@@lonelyfireflies1426 add bachelor's party and bachelorette party to all the endless ceremonies already. You will be happier if you invested all that money in bitcoin. Complete waste of money, time. I wanted to have a simpler wedding but bride party requested to have all the "taam jhaam"
This doesnot happen in Northeast part of India. We may lack in infrastructure but we are enhanced or developed in social and mental infrastructure .
Honestly I love northeast people. They r literally so sweet (saying this from personal experience)
Northeast ❤
Heaven might be a myth, Northeast is real ❤️❤️
Don't let this northies come to north east they will make hell
Me too
Parents should invest in their daughter to make her financially independent instead of giving large amount of dowry.
They give girl share from their property
Na. Parents should invest in crypto
@Chandan Matho If both girl and boy are earning the same money then what is the need to give dowry. If they are still giving dowry then they are fool.
That's not a solution , dowry is taken after that also.
education is not the solution
A guy doesn't marry unless he is financially independent. Let girls study and be financially independent just like men. And then let the marriage be for love and companionship rather than a stupid business deal that revolves around money, gold and display of social status.
👍👍👍👍👍
Yeah exactly that's how it should be
Someday you will realize that marriage is also a financial decision. That's why in advanced economies you have the scope for prenuptial agreements. Nevertheless, it all comes down to what each partner brings to the table. the value one can bring can be any combination of earning, wealth, education, social status, age, looks/physical attributes, and anything else that other people find of value. And that's marriage for you, cut and dried.
I agree with wat you said, but it's just practical world made us see harsh truths at times, most potential suitable partner one can have may be will be married off to another women who're bringing wealth with them either through dowry or by wat they earn, n the girl Taking time to settle financially maybe it's a little late in terms of societal norms that now she has to compromise on her choices bcoz she's not left with much options she has already crossed that suitable age where she could find the best potential mate... And I guess no family wants that so they choose to spare money n give dowry considering they're doing best for their daughter at right time
@@ayushigoel9009 Who decides this " suitable" age? Society is fcked up..a bunch of old fashioned people takes major decisions..what if the the sudden rush marriage becomes a failure and the partners are not compatible??? The mindset of soxiet should change. There is no suitable age...love happens organically and it's when one should get married..
In my village a woman was burnt alive just because the girls family did not give a bike (dowry) to the boys family and this case was also not reported.
I saw that too...many cases like this in village area
Only North East India is dowry free zone, and I am a proud northeast Indian .
Me too buddy.. ❤️❤️
Me too
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
It must be heaven
❤❤yaah... We proud of it
My parents are happy in this case ,
They didn't give and can't take dowry
My brother in law refused to take dowry
And me being unemployed and useless, it's uncertain if I m ever getting married 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂
💋💋💋💋💋❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️😂🤣😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@kamartaj3010 😂😂😂😂😂
Women doing house work are seen as repressed or some kind of torture.. Many men would be happy doing house work (which they can complete in 2-3 hours) and then could spend whole day watching netflix, playing pubg, house party with friends.. But thing is a high earning women would never marry a jobless which is opposite for men..😀 😀
I am gonna tell you a story. My parents got their union through love marriage. So, naturally no dowry was involved. In fact the marriage is intercast. Now, as I venture out with the same ideology (I despise dowry. It’s basically selling myself for god’s sake), I have seen girls whose families were apprehensive BECAUSE I didn’t ask for dowry. People automatically assume that I am lacking something. Weird.
Don't settle for them!!Rather,in my society it's the other way round that if the girl's family is willing to give more money than the guy deserves, they're trying to "compensate" for the girl
lol that last point
So true as baba saheb said if untouchability is to be abolished marry intercaste, I think this would help in decreasing dowry cases too.
Means they assumed that you don't asked for dowry because you are lacking something .......Hahahahah Fuck society.
@@nitishamehta9337 he never said it. And untouchability can only be abolished by abolishing Hinduism.
In inter caste marriages the taboo and hatred against groom/bride who is from so called Lower caste dosent fade and it eventually results in honour killing, domestic violence or separation.
I'm not justifying caste bsed marriages but person from lower caste background do suffer in inter caste marriage setup in majority of cases
My mother says ,she will not gv anything in the name of dowry to the man we will marry.When relatives asked , who will marry ur daughters then,, she answered - the man with dignity.
The man with dignity who you'll reject outright as not a good match.
@@user-ex7ex1qt4t yeah the man with dignity ( aka 6 digit salary )
I wish your mother gives you right on your paternal property. If that's the case, I would agree with your mother.
Khudko bhi independent hona padega. If girl dont earn she will do house chores at that man of dignities home.
Fabulous reply
I know a person who got rank 7 in CSE and became SDM. In next 1 year he got married in a 5 star hotel and got more than 50 lakhs as dowry through various means. If such an educated person cannot convince his family regarding dowry god knows who will.
People say i am not practical enough but they took dowry in their marriage. I say i am okay being less practical but i am not going accept dowry.
😂 God bless Indian society.
Most people become govt officers just for dowry
Sirf dahej k liye log govt naukri lgane ki koshish krte hai? Sukoon se zindagi bitane ke liye nahi?? ...gomutra thodi kam piyo
The guy u are talking about himself wants money in the form of dowry. Next he will take bribe for any work he will do. These so called SDMs are most currupt species. Their first bribe is in the form of dowry. The why he will convince his parents for no dowry
Are Bhai usne din rat jo padhai ki hai usi ki wajah se uske baap ne Market Price 50 lakh rakhi hogi😁😁😁
@@cerberus9612 bribe bhe toh khanne hai corrupt govt officer nai
Being from Gujjar community , I couldn't agree more to this. Here crores of rupees are spent on wedding ,furniture luxury cars and if that's not enough they will also give cash . Honestly , I don't want to marry a guy who is materialistic. This really inspires me to become financially independent . If I really want to spend my life with someone , it would be someone who loves and respects me otherwise I'm happy :)
Do investment if your are in your teenage, and want to become financially independent
true! I'm not going to pay someone into marrying me. I'm better than that.
Darn it same dude , I am happy individual way actually in today's generation the present millennials are actually thinking about late marriage or no marriage or totally going alternate forms of relationships.
@Wallah Habibi I am sorry but taking dowry an over all option be justified no , I won't support single penny to be given unless needed I am making relationship not business n according to women having high paid hubbies it's on their own most of these are the same woman who regret marrying a rich guy because a rich guy has options to leave as easy he came n as easily he can leave , if the rich man wants he can throw an amt of compensation and just wash off his duties from the woman , n that his absolute right unless the woman is herself rich than the stakes are woman won't like to take the compensation but she will demand half of his profits again business transactions no relationship happening here , I don't comply on marriage now I have seen my own parents case n I regret that I will even marry.
@Wallah Habibi Marriage is a business and it has become worse over time be it woman or man , marriage in david Attenborough case is just copulation human species but in an elaborate mateing rituals just to get offspring for other generation. Humans are as animal as an actual animal but they have sophisticated ways that's it.
Usse dowry nahi "We don't accept money, only gifts kehte hai" 😂😂😂
Par gift ka itna paisa kharach kar deta hain ki wo dowry se kuch kam nahi hota
Gifts are legal dowry😂😂
Hamare yaha toh gifts bhi Allowed nahi
Agar le bhi toh bass Ladki ke Saman(Makeup Kit , Saree etc) le sakte hai nothing else
Yes so-called _"Shagun"_
Come to North East meghalaya my Friend the concept is different
"Groom quality", "Groom price" 😂😂, I love the way you brought down groom to mere commodity. I'm sure if we coin some more word like these in our daily life to describe such low lives, that graph will surely come down
And also he used the term "market value"😂
Ikr i can't be the only one who legit laughed my head off every time i heard - "market value". Grooms are the new soap xD
@@astanopasta Groom ka bhav bahut badh raha hai
If he is High level business man or High rank government officials then Yes.
It's Girls family's fault , they just want rich& sucessful groom
ur comment sounds like ur a feminist
and a hardcore one
For some parents, dowry is a kind of a proud statement in the society. That "they got their daughter married by giving 1 crore cash, a big bungalow, and a big car."
bhai dowry arrange marriages me krte h, aur arrange marriages(caste-based) me ladke ki value ladki se bahot zyada hoti h(generally) toh vo ladka kyu karega usse shaadi, maybe that's why dowry still exists..
There's a saying
yeah dude. especially in delhi
@@aryakomal Im not against dowry. It is for my personal security just in case my wife ditch me in future and eat half my property as her compensation.
alimony is just expensive and legal pro$titution.
@@mausenpai215 bhai...toh shadi mat kar...bachcha chahiye? Adopt kar le
I belong to Bihar. In my state, dowry is like a shit status game like someone got a big dowry they have good status in our society and some days ago, I have discussed on this topic with my father. It was like fight between us. 😂😂😂
I am also from bihar this is very true recently my cousin sister got married lot of money was given to the groom family dowry is a status game this is very ture.
Bhai.. Apna Bihar is next level thing in case of dowry... And it is so uniform all across the society, irrespective of religion and caste.
No exceptions.
Rip your ego bro 😂
That's how it should start ..... everything which starts from grass root level is the more stronger ideology .....we the youth should start implementing in our house first and the chain follows
@@eagleye7262 exactly... The buck stops with us, the youths of this nation..
This will only stop when marriage become a connection between two people than two families
Well marriage is no longer a connection of two individuals. The concept is now too old. Now It is more of an risky agreement determined by compatibility which is accompanied with certain T&Cs. Why risky, because you have a lot to lose if the compatibility is lost.
Yes this is the true solution. This video suggests us that we need to increase "bride market price".
Like bride is something like commodity with market price...
Is this a solution or slave dealings?
That's the point.👍
@@srikumarmondal3294 agreed
@@strayedaway19 Absolutely agreed, high time India introduces prenups!
IAS,IPS who write pages of article about stopping dowry in UPSE exam end up having most dowry.
🤦🤦😔
Reality is often dissopntment
TRUE the hypocrisy is CRAZY 🤡🤡
"stop objectifying men and women" that's what society should learn!
Stop using people for-
1. Emotional comforting.
2. Boosting your self confidence.
3. Wiping off your tears.
4. Time Pass.
5. Bearing your expenses. Etc. Both men and women should stop doing such things.
@@supreeths6006 stop using people in the first place
LOL xd
*stop objectifying men , women or anyone in between* this is what society should learn
@@a.mishra5608 oh I missed that thank you for the correction
@@0xdtt11 ❤️❤️no problem
In North East India, there is no dowry exist. I feel proud for that .
Alas but that's not true.
In tripura, it exist and is increasing rapidly.🥲
Ppl sell brides in tribal culture so they demand money while giving their daughters
Bro it exist(assam)
@@Vital_Game7Maybe from other groups but not Assamese in Assamese culture if you accept dowry it's bed luck 🤞 we just give free clothes to everyone
Dege bhi kya momos?
My mother's cousin recently got married and she was a dentist so "naturally" her parents wanted her to marry a doctor and they ended up spending a lot of money on the wedding and "gifts" which weren't asked by the groom's family but they still did it because he was a doctor. The female's family is just as responsibile as the male's and sometimes more.
Ikrr.
Yes, you are right.....many a times the bride's family gives dowry even when the groom's family did'nt demand.....actually during marriage many neighbours and relatives use to come and ask " ladke walo ko kya diya" and if they come to know that the bride's family has'nt given dowry they will say "kaise log hai ladki ko bina dahej vidah kar rahe hai"......the society sucks!!!
@@waleedrand7810 As much implemented and viraciously enjoyed. Non Muslims are left behind, though, in this race of Muslims. Translate Haram for the Muslims.
@@sudiptachowdhury3410 I agree this happens but I personally think dowry will never end.
I like nothing about Indian wedding system. People waste money without thinking about upcoming time. Middle class even not hesitate to borrow money to complete wedding.
Marriage is just an excuse, money is the motivation. People want to lift their status, build contacts, acquire assets and swell bank balance through marriage. However educated we may become, greed won't go. Bride will soon face showers of taunts that she didn't bring dowry. Unless they opt for nuclear family after marriage, it can't be avoided.
To be honest, love or arrange either way marriage is worthless if it doesn't bring gains to both parties. Be nuclear be happy.
@@aditigupta7222 if u won't take dowery then u will take share in ur father property and will give to ur 'pyare patidev'
Marriage should be between only the couple. Their family should not intervene.
Hahaha India h dude, pdhi likhi ladkia apni mrzi se shadi nai kr pati...anpad ki toh haalat fir bhool hi jao
Correct
Abe jaa na 💘 de
This is nice but we Indian see marriage as special family event
@Biswamohan Mohanty this happens in western countries women have all the freedom and guess what divorce rates are more than 50% and about 80% of them are initiated by women. Due to arrange marriage mens get married and what happens when give all the freedom to women to whom to marry or to be in relationship with they all chases top 10 to 20% of the mens who are higher in status, money and famous. One more statistics in western countries about 10 to 20% of all the singles having sex with about 80 to 90% of the women and why because all the women are chasing them.
Simple solution - reject the guy when the first demand arrives,
Well......my upper caste relatives didn't accept my lower caste wife.....they asked for 60% of her family wealth as gift....even our village priest told we r sin in our UP village where DAILTS and dowary killing and raping is common..
But my father didn't even care we had big wedding in Udaipur palace and reciption I'm UK and Singapore,my wife is hindu Singapore born of Indian origin.
We r happy in Duabi,UK and marituitus and Singapore..... marituitus where 53% r Hindus there is no dowry or caste system there. I'm an atheist now just like my wife who left hindusim because even through she has Talent, kind,no arrogance,money to live and good education and work but she is treated every badly in UP village because her caste is lower.
My parents who resettled in Bangalore and love happily there.....my brother married an Muslim an UK arab Muslim and lives in UK in my wife's home which her father gave to his only child.
In our family of mothers side .....gold is given to bride in mariage so in future it will help her
@@arunroy9997 sad to hear bro... caste system is a curse
@@diya1113 due to this reason Dalits and obcs are converting to Christianity, go and see ap, almost half of the state is Cristian, now they outnumber the Hindus.
@@arunroy9997 Same thing happened with my cousin. Him and his Upper Caste Girlfriend, Brahmin to be specific were in a relationship since Medical school, they loved each other more than anything but the Girls family wouldn't accept a Low Caste as their Son-in-law.
My cousin had no flaws good looking, very tall, smart, Doctor, 6figures salary & belonged to a prosperous & respected family who lived in Greater Kailash (posh area) of Delhi.
The Girl being from a Brahmin family & her father being a Priest who strongly believed in Caste system didn't help the matter. They (couple) struggled & resisted for 6 years for Love. After, they realized that these 2 won't budge they finally agreed to accept him as their Son-in-Law.
Now it has been 3 years since they got married they have a Beautiful Son & daughter and live happily with the support & blessings of Both families. Recently, they moved to London too.
@Посейдон Афродита Дионис
Yes.why not if the guy can promise that if she want to do her job even after having kids and that he will support her in household chores and care for their kids . Not every girl is same dude change your mentality .🙏
I am the oldest, a girl. When my mother was pregnant second time, My grandparent and aunts keep telling me . " God listens to little children, so Pray you have a brother. "
When i ask why "Your father will be too much burdened if he has another girl, and a boy will look after them when old etc..
Now my parent live with me and husband, not my brother.
I am the oldest, a girl. When my mother was pregnant second time, My grandparent and aunts keep telling me . " God listens to little children, so Pray you have a brother. "
When i ask why "Your father will be too much burdened if he has another girl, and a boy will look after them when old etc..
Now my parent live with me and husband, not my brother.
Edit 1: *what about your inlaws? ": My husband moved to big city many years before I met him. We continue to financialy support as he did before. His brother and family live with my in-laws in the village. They visit us, but they rarely stay long as they enjoy life in village. I take kids back every year. If I move to village how can he financially support them? So they haven't asked me to either.
Edit 2: what aunts say now : No magic happened I suppose now they say " Poor man, he is unlucky he has to live with his daughter"
@LP ❤️
Which state are you from?
Nice
if we really want to end the dowry .
Then its request for guys to avoid and straighly neglect his parents wish to get dowry from girl side.
Why not tell them
u won't marry if dowry would be case in marriage
😃
if no-one would be there to take it then it would end this practice .
@@pikachuthunderbolt3919peer pressure
I never understood, why girls marry with a person who demands dowry for marriage.
Ye marriage hai ya business.
Buisness
If girls had a choice they would have rejected this a long time ago. If they say no they get beaten up or shunned by the society. It's the fear that keeps them silent
@@charu2774 Which is exactly why we need irreverent ( according to society) and fearless girls and even fearless guys that will break these so called traditional values and customs.
Phir to shaadi k baad half property bhi hadapna nahi chahiye
@@Yennefer-bg9hb 20 lakh dahej dekar Ghar m hissa mangti hai log😂
The concept of BIG FAT INDIAN WEDDING with a show off culture through social media also plays a key role.
based view
@@madhavireddy1792 I have seen in middle class families also ,they tend to go a little further whether happily by choice or due to society.
💯
True
Wedding business and matrimony business is huge
Bachelor's party sangeet engagement etc
Wedding industry is show off
Both families want to show off
even my mom is saving money so that she could buy gold for my marraige.I often ask her to buy a piece of land with that money as a good source of investment but she refuses as she thinks without gold it's impossible for me to get married.this is the condition of our society.that's y I seriously need to be self independent asap.
Find a guy for yourself, who loves you. Then the money saved will be with your mother forever
@@sudarshan3965 absolutely
Yes, you can earn your own money and use that for your marriage, and sell the gold collected by your mom and invest in land 🔥
Do not marry a guy who's condition to marry is dowry. No matter what !!
best of luck!!!
Most of the people feel sad about dowri system but when their turn arrives they do the same.
True
Its very apt for todays situation
True..in some cases I have also seen some guys rejecting dowry but the girls family insisting on giving dowr as according to them what will others say..
I think another issue is the big fat Indian weddings, where families put everything on the line..this also raises expectations for dowry
Correct..
😏😏😂😂
The Problem is when Burocrates like
IAS, IPS, they demand dowry.
What do you expect from the society.
Jisko laws implementation karana hota hai, wo khud laws break krte hai.
The solution is Privatisation.
Bhai Bihar me bahut ias ips bhare pade hai or . Recently mere hi pehchan k ek IAS officer ko 70 lakh dowry Mila and he demanded 90 lakh .or bohot Sare officer hai Bihar me jinka shadi 50, 65,40 lakh. Dowry m hota hai. Pura Bihar Ka economy is pe hi depend hai
@Spell Check Bhai mere taraph ek judge hai jiski Shaadi hui thi to ladki wali ne blank check de diya or bola ki Apne Mann se fill karlo and he filled somewhere close to 60 lakh.
Jab IAS ips le rhe hai judge bhi le rha hai dahej to ki se expect kroge . Or ha living without marrying will be difficult for both male and female.😂😂 Isn't it?
@Spell Check
Exactly !! People should just focus on the solution given on educating women than wage wars in the comment section on origin of dowry
And i think it would take a lot longer for people to realize marriage isnt a compulsion, atleast in India
@@tdxgamer5176 wow judge bhi yani wo judge Jo court me dowry lene walo ko jail ki saja deta hai wo khud dowry leta hai 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 us judge ko mai puchna chahunga ,"Your hounour ap khudko kitne sal ki jail doge?"
Shame on parents and Aunties who forces their child to accept dowries…
@AMAZING SPACE I asked your region in the other comment as dowrey is more prevalent in up and bihar and haryana as compared to west Bengal from where I am . So in India yes region can define your thought process. I asked your region because if you are from these regions then it is expected of your answer. And the people of up and bihar are generally backward in thinking so it is hopeless to argue
*Aunties and Uncles
😂
And also shame on those parents who wants a govt servant for their daughter. Isn't that a type of dowry??
@Elleon Mor in case divorce ho jaye toh sayad aapko nahi pata, income ke according paise wife ko dene padte hain.
Aur aap toh aise baat kar rahe ho jaise shadi ke baad husband apni kamayi se aur biwi apni baap ki paison se chalte hain.
Education is the best and the only gift parents can give to their girl child.
Brain is a gift I wish your parents had given u
@@catfishsensei4306 wtf
@@aloowalia2849 I've seen this guy's comments on every woman and feminism related videos. He's an incel, don't mind him.
@@turtllee yeah 😁
Sadly that education can't provide you job 😑 you'll still struggle to get a job unless you are from IIT's or IIM's
In my case, we asked nothing. Infact we shared costs of wedding in half proportion (in my native area - satara, Maharashtra, the girls family bears the full cost).
Her father had visited my newly built native home, and to my surprise, they gave electronics that were not there as a “gift” on the wedding day without asking!!
Same. It happens in our community as well. Mostly the house is built by husbands family and wife's family gives gift mostly electronics.
Amna bhi nahi manga tha lekin jab de rai hai mana kaise kara itna electronics khamaka jaiga bhar me
It feels like u people are saying no dowry just gift vo bhi for their daughter 😂
@@nitishamehta9337 Nahi. I don’t stay at native. So those gifts are actually useless to me. In my Mumbai home, I have everything! They (I am guessing it’s her cousins) contributed and gave the electronics as gift 🤷🏻♀️
In my case, we even paid for the complete reception and bride's stuff
Giving a dowry isn't one isolated event. It sets the tone for the entire relationship between the families. It puts the bride's family on a lower footing than the groom's because they are literally paying someone to take their daughter off their hands. It gives the groom's family permission to be infinitely greedy. Why would they stop? They have the dowry and the girl, they have no reason not to ask for more. Say "NO" to that first demand. Walk away.
Ladki wala ne mere ko bola salary slip dikhao. Phir bola ghar nahi tere pas to mana kar dia.
@@rt7484 toh kama na , mehnat kar ,
"Any young man, who makes dowry a condition to marriage, discredits his education and his country & dishonours womanhood."
-M.K Gandhi.
WISE WORDS SIR
Watch Prachyam video on "how dowry pratha came into existence..from where.. Real origin.
Just search " Prachyam Dowry "
@@theniravpanchal is that a channel name?
@@theniravpanchal Mughals lai?
Mere papa ne bhi ki😂😂
Look at the personal level, we can acknowledge this FACT and try to Change the opinion of our parents and peers and be sure to call them out for this.
yes..indian parents especially of a girl are way to emotional. they will say they are giving gift not “dowry” only so that their daughter remains in a happy marriage
I have a sister
And without dowry no one will marry her because she is uneducated..
What do i do???
Is there any practical solution?
@@duogala3098 marry her to a less educated man
why is mohak leaning towards liberal
@@duogala3098 Bro, what is this obsession with marriage? Why marry?
and their favourite dialogue, *"agar wo apni beti ko, apni iccha se GIFTS dena chahte hai to how can we stop them, LOL"*
Gifts out of love is okay infact it's great to support a newly starting family....but forcing girl's father's to pay is bad...
It's Prestige Issue 😁
They should also give her share in the property.
Yeahh
if we really want to end the dowry .
Then its request for guys to avoid and straighly neglect his parents wish to get dowry from girl side.
Why not tell them
u won't marry if dowry would be case in marriage
😃
if no-one would be there to take it then it would end this practice .
I think increasing 'bride value' is the solution for this. Nowadays, from what I have observed around me, if the girl is just as qualified as the boy and earns almost equal as him, then her family doesn't pay dowry. But if the gap between their incomes is significant or if she's uneducated, then her family has to pay dowry.
The guy wants dowry and the girl's family wants a rich, well settled guy... Never ending process 😄
Sahi kaha. Do dhari talwar h
💯
True😔😔
@@veda8780 fake pfp
The reason is simple the guy is educated to look after his wife by earning money and on the other hand girl is denied education so that the money can be given to the guy to look after the girl.. so all parents educate your children and make them independent 🙏
The Reason Why parents are against Love marriages cause they know they won't get a stuff. I hope people can change.
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@@shwetasharma6901 But Now no one goes to forest for Mukti
@@shwetasharma6901 Sati Pratha bhi start krdo fir 🤡....clown
@@saloni495 😂 yr aur uske lia bhi inlog aur illogical reason soch hi rahe honge
@@saloni495 Bhai it is a spammer
In India marriage is a business where the groom and bride are products and marriage is a service.
It's everywhere. Karl Marx mentioned that every marriage is a business.
@@rupeshsmn are u trying to justify dowry ?
@@rupeshsmn in Karl max generation even western countries have arrange marriage system which have gone obsolete! Update yourself
They probably serve to thier parents
End Hinduism
In 90s there was a huge spate of dowry driven domestic violence incidents where the husband and his parents would live the gas on overnight and send the woman(wife/daughter in law) to prepare morning tea. There would be fire and the woman would land up in government hospital with 3 degree burns and die. The family would pretend to mourn the accidental death and then remarry the male again. This was so rampant that Sudha Murthy, after a heart wrenching visual she met in a govt. Hospital, through her NGO donated several cooling containers to hospitals in order to place the victims in those horrifying last hours of their life before death rescued them from the monsters called hisband and in-laws.
The shocking part is even after being highly educated, both parties involved in the marriage don't seem to see what's wrong with this tradition.
This dowry system is not only supported from the groom's side, but even the bride's side also considers this to show off of their wealth to the society.
💯💯
This is so true. I've seen people argue that well-educated families with girls that have high paying jobs would never accept to marry a person who demands dowry, and this is just not true. Just because someone has a high paying job does not mean they have a progressive social mentality
@AMAZING SPACE you are correct but ajkal kya hota hai ye showing off culture hogaya hai,logo ke paas khane ko roti nahi lone le le ke shadi karte hai,just because society mei competition laga h
@@crocsAreUgly Husband's house is not a free hotel.
Dowry is a myth.
You have to pay the rent and food cost to husband.
@@ultimate6243 Dowry isn't a myth, it still very much exists. Plus, the "rent and food cost" is paid for by the household labour that women do.
This is never going to end. Majority of my friends who are well educated shamelessly defends taking dowry from girls family.
Exactly! Dowry and Mahr should be abolished
Mahr ?
Its is taught To kids
it can start with you.
@@yuvrajsehgal9738 Mahr is the money or property which boy will give to girl if they get divorced. There's difference between dowry and mahr
If dahej is involved, you simply aren't yet capable to get married.
That makes so much sense🙌
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@@pranjalthakur7532 Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@@shwetasharma6901 Well if it was equal, the groom should be given dowry too, either way it's wrong. Bdw I believe your theory also makes sense. Peace ✌️
@@pranjalthakur7532 Peace Bhen. I think you misunderstood or I miscommunicate but i want you to know that Both Families/Parties give Couples their Financials like Bride's Family give Jewelry(etc), Groom's Family give their Property. And I by not means suggest that Dowry in its current form is good.
I’m quite surprised that you included bride price . I’m from the northeast and we still find instances of bride price in many communities and in some it has just become something in name where you pay 15 or 11 rs as part of tradition . The only reason in most NE state dowry is not prevalent is due to bride price which we find in decline as many women are in workforce . On such example would be market places which in many other parts of the country is dominated by men while in the northeast it is primarily dominated by women .
Being from a jaat family, it's a matter of pride for our conservative family and relatives, I try so much to make them understand about this but there is no effect, now I don't do any effort to make them understand I just patiently study and I am sure I'll get a good job then I'll not practice it in my marriage atleast and also for my brother and the next generation of ours... small changes can bring big change to the society.... that's why I am doing a hardwork...
Finally... someone said. It is for pride in our society.
They see pride not only in receiving dowry infact in giving dowry.
And young generation or people like us will not get anything to say in this..
Agreed. If u can't change others, which is just next to impossible, be the change urself.
So true ❤️
As a jaat girl, i support you and our other jaat sisters. Only a jaat girl can understand how much we are suppressed in our family. Not that other people don't, but since I'm jaat, i understand you precisely
Also we call it "dusar" instead of dowry..... Like that's gonna change the fact that it it dowry 😂
When you treat marriage like a shopping list you get a bill at the end.
It's such an interesting quote. Please elaborate on it in more detail.
@@RY-xk7wp girls family selects groom based on his package.
Hence they give groom greed in the form of dowry to marry their daughter
@@kalukutta what if the girl is also earning and well educated , to ab kya acche ladko se shadi karna pap hai
@@medhakasture9545 they usually don't want equal they want more. If a earning girl sattle for a equally earning guy, good for them but usually that don't happen.
@@wellyesbutactuallyno9776 I mean I get it but if I am an ambitious woman I would want to get married to an ambitious guy too , like in the tech industry if the difference in the salary is 5-6 lakhs it doesn't really matter but yeah if a person who is working for 6 years and is still earning 4 lakhs there is some problem and I would not want to marry a problematic guy
A girl and her parents agreed to Pay Dowrey even in So called "Love" Marriages . 🤦
When I asked this both of them now don't talk to me calling it as their personal lives
Those people don't deserve a good friend like you .
@Unknown shut up. Very few get divorced in india
So you have a problem with parents giving something to her daughter's family?
Are you jealous that girl had a real marriage?
And guess what, people like you are creepy, thus anyone would ghost you when you target them.
Instead of giving dowry, they should have agreed to give their daughter right on her paternal property.
@@THEJUGGLERS Why do something that will ruin livelihood and make disrupt lives?
Dowry is not even an Indian tradition to begin with. It was brought to India by the colonial rulers. People still keep it anyway because its convenient.
We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them."
That's what this video talks about
Who said that mister?
if we really want to end the dowry .
Then its request for guys to avoid and straighly neglect his parents wish to get dowry from girl side.
Why not tell them
u won't marry if dowry would be case in marriage
😃
if no-one would be there to take it then it would end this practice .
Albert Einstein said this 😍
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha. Pls Stop Defaming India.
Nowadays it is double burden on girl's parents as the groom's parents expect educated housemaid for their sons. Girl's parents spend on daughter's education and also on dowry. In the end girl can't use both dowry money and her education
exactly. The groom's family wants a highly educated, but "docile and submissive girl" so that she can cook food all day for the family while simultaneously looking after the kids' education, so that way the groom can dust his hands off of all the childcare.
From which region are you
@@crocsAreUgly cooking and cleaning is easy compared to working in a corporation. ik this because i do all the household work.
@@koushikkn127 Well, imo it depends. Would doing housework when one can listen to their favorite playlists when cleaning, cooking etc and relax afterwards be wayy better than a corporate job where your boss screams at you and you have to stare at a screen all day? Of course it would. (I'm not implying that you do this btw lol just giving an example for comparison's sake) But that is most often not the case for indian households. Women have to cook for the entire family, and most of the time a majority of their day goes into cooking, and all the other household work comes afterwards. Then comes looking after kids and all that stuff. Sprinkle some lack of respect and freedom onto that and boom you've got misery. Basically what I'm saying is that it's not solely household work which is the problem, it's more of an amalgamation of factors that come as a result of being a wife that does housework that causes issues.
Parents ka kaam sirf pdhnan nhi usse financial independent banna bhi hota hai but mostly parents iss bare me nhi sochte hai
Even our community demands for dowry like any other community. If a girl fails to bring dowry, her in laws taunt her almost all the time. I remember one of my friend told me about their relatives. This is the real story and it's still going on with that girl. So my friend's relatives selected one girl for their son and while deciding about wedding they told the bride parents that they need nothing from their end. Bride family member thought those people (groom parents) are humble. But once that girl got married they started taunting her all the time. My friend told me that they humiliate that girl in front of everyone. They taunts her like this (hamari bahu kuch nhi laayi, iske baap ne kuch nhi Diya etc). My question is why the hell they act like great humans when they are actually not? If you are low standard people, tell them straight away. Don't trouble, humiliate a girl in that way ...
@Spell Check then their lives will be full of disrespect
@Spell Check yeah but in our country girls are pressurized to go through this shit. Because if they file a divorce. Next thing is they will be ill treated by her family members and on top of that men's will change they look that girl. And much more. Every one shows that they are against dowry,mental abuse and all and when someone gets a opportunity to remarry the divorced girl no one would come forward. Every one will support but when they get opportunity to act they will back off . And they put blame on their parents saying my parents won't agree and all. Men who marry those girls are gems which is very less in our country. So girl thinks all this and compromise with her conditions
I believe every girl should be independent so that they won't rely on their husbands even if he leaves her. As sir said in video that's the solution i believe. Coz i know one of relative who faced domestic violence. Her husband know that she is illiterate so can't do anything. Moreover he is confident that she won't leave him since she is illiterate and can't live survive without him. So the bottom line is making girl a independent is vital in this era.
@@deepanshu_2004 it's better than constant mental abuse and what others think aka the "log kya sochenge" is the wrong mentality most of Indians have.
@@syedkhadeer5348 but who will make the girl independent? Many of the parents don't do that. Education should be made free, basic necessities like seperate toilets in schools, colleges should be taken care of, the home and outside atmosphere should be made less sexist and toxic. Sex-ed, self-defense, humanity etc should be taught to everyone. These and many other things are to be taken care of.
My dad once told me that when he was getting married he told his dad to not ask for dowry from my mom's side. Grandpa told dad if that happens then the girls side would think something is off.. down there.. 😂
Kya hai re 😂😂
Ya that's true.
Fack😑
Something is off ... means? I couldn't understand.
@@A_Responsible_Citizen transgender hai aur cliche Indian social structure and transphobia so yeah :P
Ladke me kami 😂
The tradition of girl living with her in- laws after marriage in itself is flawed.
Living independent is also a flaw. Who will pay the rent
@@hardeeprajput6564 The girl herself or share it with her Husband.
@@hardeeprajput6564 lol imo if you do not even have the money to pay rent then you should not marry.
@@Ashwin-ksr why to pay rent when I built that house and invited parents to live. I am still not getting your logic.
@@pnirmal5900 The house belong to both of them. Why would girl pay rent in her own house.
"hum to apni beti ke liye de rahe hai, apke bete ko nhi "
Aajkal ka trend
@Abhishek Singh jitna time reply me lgta utna pdd lete comment... The comment from girl's family side... As they use to justify dowry these days.
@Abhishek Singh boys don't want fair, slim, rich, good looking girl who can cook, give birth to a son, do all the household chores, look after in laws etc ??
Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@@radhikathakur286 Most Correct Dowry Theory: Dowry was Given to Bride Because Hinduism is Most Liberal Religion. Our Sages and Old Intellectual wants Equal Contribution From Both Partners and in old times Parents do not live with their Childrens After Marriage. They go to forest for Attaining Moksha.
@Abhishek Singh Girls earning 70000 per month want a guy who earns 1 lakh per month at least. You can check in matrimonial sites. Now tell me who's marrying for money then ?
High court judge!! How such highly educated people are so morally corrupt?
I hope this ends.
And he is retired*
I can bet on his judgements to be accurate on all the cases he handled:)
IAS ka rate 5 crores hai
@@funkyderek9081 Sahi Kaha Brahman reservation judiciary main isiliye Aisi galat hai . Yahi to merit hai aise hi Nahi croro case pending hai India main . End Brahman reservation in judiciary
Aur yahe log dowry kai case mai fasla sunate hai 😂😂😂
There is a difference between being educated and being civilized
Just before you have college degree that does not make you the smartest guy and just because you are school dropper that doesn't make you illiterate
Being a girl ... I'm scared to get married by seeing all these 😖 ....
Sometimes I feel Why I born as a girl because of all these 💔
1st world is changing
2nd you r upsc asperent 😂 after becoming cevil servant grom will give dowry.....best of luck
@@terabhai_boogeyman yeh bhi sach hai 😂❤️
My grandma told me that neither she nor anybody in her village ever gave dowry and then told me in recent times it had become a practice and now every groom in our village wants dowry 😒😒😒
@อาร์ทิมิส อะโฟรไดท์ ไดโอนีซอส ซุส เฮร่า อพอลโล โพไซดอน lol its a village still people do only agricultural stuff those who went to the cities acquired jobs never came back situation are same but still these men want dowry
@@cyborg6282 nah she told me she was around 19 when she married
@อาร์ทิมิส อะโฟรไดท์ ไดโอนีซอส ซุส เฮร่า อพอลโล โพไซดอน so u are type of the person who says money doesn't matter 😂. Many people do not let their daughter in law work so she depends financially on husband so wanting a well off isn't bad tbh.
@@hitankshee5131 well u r a bit right but in village area if u see mostly every men and women do agricultural stuff even my grandma or any women in the village can stay there alone and survive they all got the knowledge and skill but then they got exposed to this dowry bullshit and now everyone wants dowry, due to increase in population land has been divided a lot and many people acquire very less land its not that they are even rich but they still want dowry
@@feline7401 are you from up
Recent proposal to increase the women mairrage barr from 18 to 21 will hopefully be helpful... As women gets opportunity to educate themselves in higher studies... But i feel it eould had been better if it was 23/24 as they even have started earning and tasted financial freedom...
Exactly, there’d be way less cases of financial & housing demands made to men and also the demands of dowry & compensation made to women , if the age was 22-24.
No
I think it should be 18 for both girls and boys
@@milanshsharma1267 why... Whats wrong if they are married at age of 25(21 is too early)... They have financial freedom hence can marry or divorce ... Giving power to the girl...
@Shruti Tripathy feels early as college already take 3 year...
marriages in India are not about love and connection between tow families
But a trade business where a groom is bought on his caste and income and a bride is sold at expense of here beauty and her families wealth
and this tends to a unhappy marriage violence and sometimes murders
sad but its reality may our generation bring change 🙌🤞🤞
Very well said... They don't seem to understand that love, understanding and compatibility is most important. Rather than how much money earned or how many property one has.
Thank god it doesn't exist in Pakistan.
And what is the solution ? Even if you remove caste and dowry ,women will still marry for wealth and men for beauty snd it can also be vice versa. Just look at rich 80 year old men marrying 30 or 40 something women.
@@carymnuhgibrilsamadalnasud1222 Blasphemy, Burqa, 4 Bride marriages, Lack of Female Participation exists there, While India is acknowledging problems and trying to eliminate it, Pakistan on the other hand is in denial to acknowledge the regressiveness in its society under the garb of religion
It's everywhere...
Atleast all Asians...
I am a Bihari and I can totally relate from this. Now a days, groom family want everything things like a well earning girl, good amount of dowry and a lavished marriage. The sad part it in Bihar all expenses of marriage beared by Birde family only.
My sister, married 2 years ago. We spent lot of money on her wedding, and why not to? She is our beloved ❤️ her in laws Didn't demand for anything, but still we have everything we wanted.
And it has been two years, still her mother in law taunts her, mocks her almost everyday that she didn't bring enough for them.
This is not a secret disease, and you all know it.
can u tell me how much salary does your sister earn and her husband ? when there is gold digging for higher salary guy then no rule , laws or punishment and now you are speaking of taunting ..seriously stupid
@@deepseth7105 my sister is a gynecologist, and her husband is AE. And are you suggesting me that a man can demand anything just because he has good job? Seriously?? And do you have any idea through what women like my sister are going? Everyday, that mental torture... Surely you don't know. Because to you it seems stupid if someone would stand against your nonsense ideology. If a man wants only money, then he should not marry at all, let him earn money as much as he wants.
Rather he literally sells himself for Dowery. How pathetic!
@@deepseth7105 I have a question so if a woman earns more then you , will you b willing to get married to her and during marriage will you b willing to give money to her family, leave your parents , stay with her family and quit your job after marriage and stay back home and take care of her family ?
@@penacle7 you know many a times a women refuse to marry someone who earns less then her
@@talksense6648 a gynaecologist lady will never marry a man who demands dowry and that also, she's marrying a man of same professional status. So please dont expose your lies. Underlying reason for marital problems could be something else and you people are playing victim card and spreading fake stories like this.
This reminds me of that "Made in Heaven" episode 4.
"Am not going to pay someone to marry me". That's why we should educate more woman.
We should educate both side. How is the problem going to resolve if only bride side is educated and groom are dumb
@@hardeeprajput6564 yes I totally agree with you 👍
@Sachin Yadav Start from your sister first.
@@ManonLucas14 you are yadav sister. Will u marry me
@@hardeeprajput6564 oh, absolutely! 💯💯
This problem will be solved-when society will let women choose their right partners.
Who will marry one another for love. Not for dahej🤬
In odisha most of educated youth disagree to take dowery, and most of the dowery is very low upto 1 lakhs in average upper middile family. But many changes also may done to make it better
Everyone share this in their family WhatsApp. Someone will be ashamed,and maybe some family won't have to pay dowry or dowry as household gifts.
yep
MEHR CULTURE
➡you didn't speak anything about muslim wedding culture where the culture of mehr is prevalent.
What is meher? ➡a cash or anything suppose to given to girls at the time of their marriage.
➡If dowry culture is regressive then how is meher progressive?
Don't come with ur logic that women leave their family and all, most of the couples are going nuclear nowdays and leaving their parents in old age homes.
You spoke abt how dowry isn't only india's problem and was a culture in west too, so let me tell u about iranian culture.
In iran if a man fails to pay dowry to his wife then he has to face imprisonment.
📌FALSE DOWRY CASE.
➡how can you skip this part while discussing dowry.
It is a basic common sense that no woman would file dowry case against her husband if the marriage is running succesfully.
➡most of the dowry cases are filed in divorce battles to harass husband and his family. Since there is no punishment for filing false dowry cases, it's mostly suggested by lawyers to women to file dowry case.
In BANGLADESH a woman can land up in jail for filing false dowry case.
NISHA SHARMA CASE
➡Edit
The Nisha Sharma dowry case was an anti-dowry lawsuit in India that represented how IPC 498A law can be misused. It began in 2003 when Nisha Sharma accused her prospective groom, Munish Dalal, of demanding dowry.[1] The case got much coverage from Indian and international media.[2][3][4] Nisha Sharma was portrayed as a youth icon and a role model for other women.[5] The case ended in 2012, after the court acquitted all accused.[1] The court found that she had fabricated the dowry charges to wriggle out of the wedding.[6]
@deepikanarayanbhardwaj has posted a video on youtube today abt a man who is accused of dowry and is being harassed by wife's family.
And there is demand of 50lacs to withdraw the case.
📌JWELLERY DEMAND BY BRIDE
➡there have been many cases where women refuse to marry the man if he brings less jewellery.
Most of the cases i have seen are from uttarpradesh and in these type of cases the victim is a boy so english media rarely speaks abt it.
You can search this two words to see the cases on google➡ जेवर शादी
Indian laws-in case of divorce the jewlleries given to the woman in duration of marriage will remain with her only and the gifts recieved by the man will be taken back.
📌ALIMONY
➡dowry is illegal while working women demanding alimony is legal.
Famous women who demanded alimony-malaila arora, karishma kapoor, susain khan and the recent case is from karan mehra's wife nisha
Most of the verified feminist pages support alimony even if the wife is working and can sustain herself
➡no woman faces imprisonment for not paying dowry but there are thousands of men in prison who fails to pay alimony, i saw a case where man was in jail For not paying maintenance and died.
Some misandrist judgements
➡punjab and haryana high court-beg borrow or steal but pay your wife
➡working wife is not a ground to deny maintenance
➡it is man's duty to provide for his family even if he's disabled.
Judgements when men demand alimony👇
➡if men will start demanding maintenance it will promote idleness in society.
Solution for dowry-do u think a woman who's earning 15 lakh per annum will pay dowry? No she won't, it's incompetent woman's father who pay dowry so that their daughters get married to a rich man to continue the luxury she was getting in her father's home.
Start marrying women with men who earns as equal as her.
If your daughter can't continue the luxury better don't marry her by offering dowry.
📌some women and men say that if a woman wants to marry a rich man for securing her future , it's not wrong.
➡Tell me the same way if a man wants to secure his future by taking dowry how is it wrong?
They-no man is murdered for govt job and properties.
Fact-there are 1000s of cases where women killed their husbands for properties and cash. Google will help you. The sole reason behind this murders was man's property.
@Ranjan Mall Try to marry a girl with job then even girl's parents will start educating kids for sake of "marriage". If both are earning or even if she is earning then I assume she will be working at home, taking care of you and kids so that is unpaid work too.
@Ranjan Mall yes paid or unpaid work it counts. Women are bringing this to table so obviously they don't need to give dowry to groom's side. Hope you understand my point
@@apoorvajoshi9279
Dowry is security for husband incase in infuture she ask for divorce and compensation.
The dislikers are those who asked for dowry.
No religion war...
BuT Dowry is not in Hinduism.
No sanskrit word for dowry.
Yeah...
Agar isa hota to viewers==dislikes
@@YashYadav-pr6ub 🔥🔥👍
I want fortuner in shadi
Recent suicide case of sister ayesha from ahmadabad is really heartbreaking.
Yes very true my eyes are filled with tears by seeing her last video
Yeah really. Irony is that in Islam it opposite, the Groom gives 'Mahr' to the bride. And Dowry thing is cursed.
Sadly, muslims of north India are too much influenced by culture of the land and their customs.
@@kingsentertainment786 Aagaya 😑
@@kingsentertainment786 Oh, what about afganistan and iran where they stone women for simplest things.
This guy's talk reminds of me of a medical student who was asked in an medical studies exam: "What are the reasons for the sudden pause in a woman's period?". The student listed many reasons but omitted the obvious one: "she got pregnant".
The obvious reason for why dowry is present: It is simply due to the law of demand and supply in the arranged marriage market of India. Eligible high-earning grooms are in high demand and short supply and therefore they can take advantage of this market stituation and demand high prices. Are the grooms greedy? Yes. They want the free money.
Not true in all cases.
Who doesn't want free money everyone wants more money with less efforts it is the reason why women marry high earning man
Journalist ravish Kumar once said " Aap desh ke liye Kuch na Kar paaye tho at least Shaadi ke waqt dhahejh mat lo" it's great service for the country in itself. I suddenly remembered that.
I don't agree dowry should be given for girls safety otherwise she will face problems in her sasural.
@@punyashloka4946 Can you please elaborate how?
@@punyashloka4946 if dowry can only provide safety of a women in in-laws house then it's shame on the boy and his parents.
I'm from jharkhand lower middle class family I'm now 20 still my mom getting less respect than my aunty because my aunty had given dowry and my mom did not.
She cries every single day but anyhow she managed to learn tailoring and now I am doing engineering in govt. engineering college because of my mom.I love my mom.I will not take dowry in my marrige.I hope we will end up this worst tradition like sati.
Bruh yall succed
Yup we will end this tradition, and hopefully get more women to do paid work, pursue their interest and make them financially independent
@Shruti Tripathy when would indians leave the concept of rushing behind govt jobs
🤪🤪
That's why India still remain behind china
@@pikachuthunderbolt3919 I mean you can basically do not need to do half the work, collect bribes and get other provisions why would anyone want to have a dream like APJ Kalam sir said, when you can just make money like this.
If you have sister/female friend just ask her to study and be independent if you do not have money then you have to bend to the will of those who have money.
I am a doctor. My two senior from Rajasthan and Aasam was debating with me about dowry system. I am literally shocked to see how desparate they are to get the dowry.
That's a shame really, I am an mbbs student n it's disappointing to see narrow minded people here
Oh god 😶 why is these so , is people become like these, what marry they atleast ask 20 lakh to 30 lakh
@@aishwarya2130 those would be paid by other doctor family parents for a doctor groom, you want you pay. Or the best is earn as same as your partner and pay just 0 dowry.
I don't believe that educating a girl solves the dowry issue the way they say it, rather the groom might feel intimidated by a great woman and go for someone else. But if someone is highly educated, they should be allowed to find their own partner and that will work better than arranged marriage. A girl doesn't have to marry nor does a boy, just let them be and let they experience the beauty of life. Don't bind them in your shit.
law of nature: a girl never wants an equal guy.
In Meghalaya, according to Khasi Tribe the boy's family gives dowry to the girl's family which is opposite to what we see in UP, Bihar and South India.
That is the reason why I respect North Eastern states so much.
@@garimakilledar5810 no even that should be wrong na?
@@garimakilledar5810 hatt! dowry, given from any side, is bad
In muslim it's mehr . Before the marriage it's given to girl
4shaadi karega koi...toh 4 dafa mehr??? O bhai maaro mujhe
It's funny to see people justifying dowry with ''even girl's parents want rich guys". Bro in my community and almost other cultures, rich guys marry without any dowry.
Do you know what type of girls they marry with?
Not rich rich but middle class rich
@@Sanjay-gc1fd why is that your business to know?
@@cece898 then be super rich problem solved..
@@lakshyapaliwal4548 what I meant was, to someone like me who comes from culture with no concept of dowry,it seems ridiculous. Whether a guy is a peon or an IAS officer no one takes dowry in my culture. Rich guy might get a prettier or better statured girl but no 💰 or ' gifts' from in-laws lol.
I am a bengali and in bengalis dowry is almost sort of prohibited. Infact the grooms family gets defamed in society if they as for dowry. We value education and career for both men and women. Proud to be a bengali!
Dear no family in Bengal is broken ...... Bengalis r way ahead of time
@THE ZOLDICS Looks like either you have issues with the bengali community or you are a misogynist.
@THE ZOLDICS By your sense of knowledge i feel like you are liability to your family as well as society. And bengali men are handsome , good looking and powerful. I think you need to have some knowledge and insight before you utter bs in any platform.
and people who ask for dowry even in love marriage😶 what to say abt them ?
Education in it's current terms doesn't seem to be helping in changing the mindset. Since 1930's education level has increased and so as dowry so clearly education isn't doing what it is supposed to do. What we need is to impart value education & morality.
True, educational degrees are not equivalent of logical thinking or rationalism of individuals, it just means few more years in college
What is needed is independent thinking and having idea of basic moral philosophy. But since our education system focus more on memorising facts than thinking from a rational point of view, we cannot expect anything from formal education in creating social changes
Independent thinking, self esteem/respect for one's own thoughts/opinions and basic humility/modesty is very important otherwise we can easily be drowned by societal "mob mentality" which is unfortunately due to fact the most people are very insecure chasing idea of "respect" in material possession or "perceived power" in society without adding any value to society.
We can change others' mind only when we understand why someone is thinking in a particular way. Then respectfully or intelligently communicating our ideas with strong logical reasoning is helpful (prioritizing on not to think about others' thinking on our morally right decision making) . If someone thinks he is educated he should also know how to change other ignorant minds without succumbing to societal norms or anyone's pressure.
@AJ B No india is not exception or something. The fact is western educational system is best for the west. Not for Us. We are forced to be in a transition state because of the type of education we are getting. once we get fully westernised, these evils will not be there. Or we need gurukuls. not some british education crap that only produces clerks.
I totally agree with you @ Shashi . The bitter truth :(
@@madhavireddy1792 there are many factors why Indian graduates behave that way
One of them is ofc that our schools are merely a factory for future employees. No emphasis is given on creativity or research.
Second is lack of individualism- majority Indians even if they wanted to, don't take risks because we are emotionally and financially connected with our family and relatives.
Third is- our economic development most Indians are first generation graduate working in a high paying job for the first time. So their immediate priority goes on to earn back the money spent in education.
4th is our very unstable economic system- owing to which getting a minimum wage job outside of extraordinary skillset is very tough . So even if u wanna take risk, start a business or startup: u hv nothing to fall back on, ur parents are dependent on you and the market is very saturated.
Our education system are just producing 'Primitive-Educated-Labours'
In my area, in BENGAL I haven't seen any dowry marriage since 10 years....
Hats off to those activists 💓💓💓
Even before that. My parents and aunts also married without dowry. In our generation I doubt any Bengali woman would agree to marry a guy who asks dowry
I second you. Dowry doesn't exist anymore in most Bengali families.
@@subhajitghoshUC I disagree bcz my Bengali neighbour have got dowry . His surname is munda
@@SK-uq3hr Most of the bengali women these days are actually working. Further there is a complete different scenario in Bengal as most of the marriages are done within the same social status, so actually the groom stays convinced that the bride he is getting married will provide recurring returns for him and his family.
@@SK-uq3hr that's jst so relaxing to hear after all the shit that goes around this country
I still remember this when my Social sir asked us in my 7th class that who all will not take dowry raise your hand I proudly raised my hand at that time & I am 23 yrs now Single & I still abide by that 💓
App ko ladki mili abhi tak 😂😂😂
@Sneha Roy woh kaware reh ke dowri pratha khatam karenge, aap unka utsah badhaiye...
@@sneharoy5063 23 me kyu shaadi karenge?? Career banane me busy hote hai most log aaj kal ladki dhoondne me nahi
M from northeast haven't heard of dowry system as such there is usually a small amount but it's not done in formal or even recognize as a system
Mentality of Indian family is rudimentary, One of my friend who has annual income of 8 lac after tax deduction had given matrimonial ad in newspaper with title "Poor family girl need no dowry, simole marriage" as he was socialist progressive ..... Not even a single family contacted him as potential bride families thought "Guy must be having some problems : physical, mental or economical
Poor people may not have access to internet or they may not know about matrimonial sites. So information may not have reached them.
@@supreeths6006 It was in newspaper which cost 2 to 5 rs not in any matrimonial site ☺️ People have mentality that more groom ask dowry, more would ha e been his socio economic stature.
Yes they find it suspicious and abnormal. Going out of herd and surviving is very difficult in our country.
@@khushveersingh3297 I hope your friend finds a perfect life partner for himself. Sending lots of luck 🍀
@@sunnyflower9011 Send your proposal too with luck 😋
I would rather marry a much educated girl than me so that i could persue my passion without any fear of bad future life😅
❤️yeh comment par k bhut accha laga!😄
But much educated girl will not choose a less educated man like you
@@dilipsachan8669 yeah... Sadly it is the case in India... but What if i go to different country😂?
@@dilipsachan8669 yah girls always run after money if that was the case in our country then why do we need to provide education to girls? If they only go to rich guys
@@dilipsachan8669 that's not true my cousin sister is a CA and her husband is Mcom passed . But they r happily married
How can a sane guy not fight with his parents if they're asking for dowry! I would get them behind bars if they ever tried to. Sick men.
It works only if all men fight with their parents to stop dowry. What if he does that and avoids receiving dowry, but his family has to pay the same dowry for his own sister's marriage cos the guy on the other side didn't care about this?
One reason why this can't happen in large scale might be : why would an average man fight his parents and support his would-be wife and her family? What affection does he have towards this new family he has never met or this new girl he hardy knows?
@@manikantahr he need not have an affection , but morals and ethics.
The godly treatment of parents is wrong, they are humans , they can be wrong too.
@@wakeupsid2207 Abe jyada dimag mat Laga . Ya baat sunne ko milaga tera ko apne papa se 😂😂
@Hello Sir random woman is not the point , sir . If what they aspire to do is a criminal offense, they have to understand.
@@wakeupsid2207 just don't Marry dude . The hell is getting them behind bars , they're your parents ffs
I am from a Village in U.P. Here, Mostly people are farmers, and did not earn that much money. People also did not show much interest in educating girls. But, one thing they are concern about is finding a groom for their daughters who has a government job. Some of the price tags of such grooms are;
One who is in Indian Army; 20 lakh and a bullet bike+ A girl who should be as beautiful as Missworld.
One who is in Indian Railways; 30 lakh
One who is a Government Teacher; 50 Lakh.
Because girls do not want to marry poor low salary handsome young men
🤮🤮🤮plz try to change this stupid mindset of people
Dowry system -- The most lightly taken crime in India
Crime.... You're so mistaken brother,
Violence is crime not dowry
@@Klip_klop It is a crime ,do u even know about law😒
Fk the law.... Of demanding dowry is illegal... Then demanding for a serviceman bride for an incompetent women should also be illegal...
I mean look at this way a men go through so much struggle to be successful and the other hand women do nothing, they financially first depend upon his father and then his husband.... And after that they ask for rights and equality wth is equality, why men should be provider....
@@anonymous-dg5cn Yes thanku for saying that as a women it's so shameful how some Indians think like that. Women were not even allowed rights to education by their parents so that's why they had to be dependent on their significant others. First u don't give women the opportunity to get educated and earn then some men will complain about women being dependant on them. This is hypocrisy.
@@Klip_klop yes. Bro . You are right . But I was trying to say that taking and giving dowry (which is prohibited in India) is not even seen as a crime in India .
I'm from Jharkhand and I've seen a shift in the mindset of educated families. The females in my family who weren't educated enough got married to guys who were only slightly more formally educated, and gave dowry to their in-laws. However, the educated ones with jobs of their own got married to really intelligent/wise men, and dowry wasn't discussed even once. Weird that there can be so much differences within a single family, just on the basis of education and women empowerment.
Exactly and that's why I feel that's its high time when parents should start spending money on their daughters education and make them independent rather than saving the capital for her marriage.
True even I’ve noticed in my personal life that educated males do not ask for dowry,
In Jharkhand tribal culture there was the culture of reverse dowry (bride price which was price equal to 2 oxes) which has feded away now.. now only the parents and relatives gives household items as gifts for the bride for security if the bride will have a nuclear family in future.
2 points -
1. earning is not a function of intelligence but stream of work.
2. "Education" doesn't exist in India, only skill development. 99.9% Indians don't know what's education.
Here in Bihar too
I am a guy from northern Kerala. I am from a family which follows matriarch to the point that kids carry mother's surname and women don't change names post marriage. Our men know our value and have great deal of self respect. We don't ask for money for marriage either
Wow man
Great to know you're so forward so feminist
Say no to dowry
But, all decisions in the family are made by men and not by women even in matriarchal families
In all the marriages I have seen furniture and gold is given by bride's family and people judging how much costly they have given. So dowry is matter of pride!
Ladki wala ne mere ko bola salary slip dikhao. Phir bola ghar nahi tere pas to mana kar dia.
Just yesterday an uncle came at my home and said very proudly that his doctor son took dowry worth more than 30 lakhs.
Uski marriage bhi 50Lakhs me hui hogixD
😏😏😏
Don't feel bruh everyone has such relatives.....maybe our generation should start changing things...
slap him and become a hero 😎
@@gauthampai896 hahaha 😂😂😂😂
Dowry is just a way to restrict the girl from her rights in property of her parents.
Watch Prachyam video on "how dowry pratha came into existence..from where.. Real origin.
Just search " Prachyam Dowry "
@iTs Messiah sab lalchi hain.
@iTs Messiah I think the bride parents must also be held accountable.
@iTs Messiah just tell groom that we will provide property to girl then look nobody will ask for dowary.
I also have one question for u sir while marrying ur daughter or sister do u look at finacial background of groom ?
@iTs Messiah actually when i went back to my native place and confronted them... They gave same reason...
Very proud of the fact that there has been no dowry in my family for 3 generations now
Aur alimony .
okay so, I found this channel yesterday and now I am in love with it. I get a bundle of case studies, unpopular research and the researchers, events, social conditions, terminologies, data, surveys, problems with solutions, EVERYTHING. Thankyou so much. This is not only general awareness but a bundle of knowledge about the recent happenings and their past roots.
p.s- your explanation is smooth and lucid. thankyou.
I like this ⚓ anchor 😘❤️
Be aware
He just liked to indirectly blame everything on our cultures.
Just like gore saheb did
I ask my friends, “Will you guys take Dowry?” And they would be speechless, trying to change the topic, instead of denying quickly!
Lol you know what to do next
Reality is India is a money starved nation. When you get the chance for free money, you won't deny it. It takes some amount of financial security to be able to take a moral stand.
Same lol
I have Bihari friends & they don't deny Dowry
Maybe Because we youths need money to start a family.
@@iNeed2.p
*It's not about a particular state, but a mentality!*
My sister's best friend committed Suicide by jumping from 10th floor of an apartment..her family had given rs 40 lakhs as dowry and a fortuner.. sadly the in laws and husband are roaming free having bail
Jeez
Bruh
I feel privileged for being a bengali girl now....because in urban West Bengal atleast (because idk abt rural parts) dowry is practically unheard of and pretty shameful practice. Credits to the liberal minded discussions that goes on in a middle class bengali household❤️
I was born and brought up in Rural Bengal and never heard of any dowry related incident in decades. My parents got married in 70s without any dowry. Nowadays even most Bengalees are fine with intercaste marriages.
That's very cool! I didn't want to just outright assume without knowing 😊
But sadly Bangladesh. It's still happen.
I'm also from West Bengal and yes u are right...The marriage of my parents and my other family members ( like my mama or pisi or cousins ) got married with out any dowry .. it's really shameful for and unusual thing in Bengal.
I know Bengalis r liberal open minded
Liberalism is the way to go
No dowry
Let people b people
In Maharashtra also dowry is only given in terms of jewelry very less
No dowry is given
8.5K comments on how dowry is bad, yet half of them will indulge in it after 10 years.