@@jakethejake1772 I got married once and when someone was trying to shoot the president, I (obviously) shouted "Mr president!" and tried to dive and take the bullet for him, but due to my reaction time debuff I was too late and the president died. The shooter went on to become Morgan Freeman and I filed for divorce.
I love that the first one is just "When my wife isn't watching, I'm disgustingly unhygienic!!" like he thinks that single people just don't wash their cutlery??
In case any men need to hear this: your wife or partner hitting you, hurting you, or causing you constant emotional distress, IS ABUSE. it is not okay. that is not a safe relationship. please get out as soon as you can. saying this because I spoke to a friend recently who seemed to not understand that they were being actively abused because they are male and their female spouse was hitting them regularly but "it didn't hurt that much" 💀 for clarity that is not the point. if their intent is to physically or psychologically harm you, THAT IS ABUSIVE.
seconding this because ive had to have the same conversation with other guys before!!!!! hitting isnt okay, it isnt okay when kids do it, it isnt okay when parents do it, and it isnt okay between partners of any arrangement!!!!! we developed languages because hitting is the worst way to communicate an emotion to someone, and hurting someone doesnt resolve anything.
The way that people act like being made to maintain a normal standard of cleanliness like you're indeed a human and not a swamp monster is a form of torture, but see nothing wrong with being hit by their wife is indeed crazy
Thank you! You are absolutely right. I was in an abusive relationship like your friend. I first also didn't realize how bad she was. Cause I am 1,9m and she was only 1,64m. She was lighter and weaker then me. I didn't take it seriously until she attacked me with a knife. My friends and family helped me to get out. The worst was that she always threatend to hurt herself and call the cops on me. It took me far too long to realize how toxic this relationship was.
Little clarification: They don't need to *intent* to harm you for it to be considered abuse. I think it's more accurate to say that abuse is when an individual is treated with cruelty or mistreated regardless of the abuser's intention. Many abusers don't intend to abuse, sometimes they genuinely think they're doing not doing wrong, sometimes they can't regulate their emotions and they do things they don't mean, sometimes there's another reason. Eg. Many parents who use physical punishment do it because they see it as the best parenting method to teach kids respect. They don't see it as cruel, but rather a necessary evil. It is still abuse.
I think the belittlement of male DA victims stems from misogyny in many ways. Since people perceive women as weaker, they attribute blame onto the man for "letting" her hit him. By vilifying women to be jealous, possessive and violent creatures, men who absorbed this distorted idea of female behavior are far more likely to think it's typical, and tolerate the abuse. Please, please, do not accept violence from a significant other, regardless of gender. People like this couple poison the social development of our youth.
When my wife isn't watching, I revert back to my true form as a disgusting swamp monster. It is a curse a witch cast upon me. Only the gaze of my true love can allow me to take the form of a human.
As a married person, I have never once felt this sort of malice towards my husband. My husband literally only ever tries to make me feel as happy and comfortable as possible. I can't imagine being in a relationship where, even just for the bit, you hate your spouse. It's so toxic and antiquated.
As a non-married person, I still can't imagine hating my partner that much. It's like, at that point, can I go back to being single pls? 🤣 I think the worst part is that I'm a bisexual woman, and all the time I see bisexual women on the internet outright bashing men and mocking their boyfriends. And it's like, ladies, isn't this exactly what sexist men do to us? And even worse still, is those same women are kind of misogynistic for not just.. dating a woman instead? Why bother identifying as bisexual if you only date the gender you complain about the most? Lately I've found out that I'd much rather be with a woman because yeah, men do have certain types of problems that I'm not patient enough to handle--and that's totally fine! I'm not going to fault men for that. I find that the "I hate my wife" type of "humor" has evolved into people hating their partners for any arbitrary reason, and it's sad af. I always feel bad for the partner, never for the one complaining.
two things i learned from this video 1. jarvis is single and not married (not that sure though jarvis needs to clarify) 2. couple humor is great and jarvis loves it very much
I appreciate that this type of content draws a bunch of people saying that it isn't okay for women to be violent towards their husbands/boyfriends, but I'm pleading with y'all to also recognize that depictions of irrationally angry, demanding wives/girlfriends are often misogynistic strawmen created by men to frame women as unreasonable bullies when they're actually just asking for help around the house, to have their emotional needs taken seriously, to not be cheated on, etc. (And the women who go along with this depiction do so because they're convinced that this is just how all men and heterosexual relationships are hardwired to be.)
Paul and Matthew are the only couple whose pranks I enjoy, and they're not even a prank channel. For those who don't know them, Paul is blind and Matthew just messes with him by doing things like surrounding him with plushies while he's asleep, swapping places with Paul's guide dog Mr Maple (harness and all) while Paul grabs something from the other room, keeps speaking from different parts of the room, etc. Nothing harmful, they're both having fun, Mr Maple joins in on the fun and Paul also has his own fun with Matthew as well.
Ok the perfume one made me laugh! I am EXTREMELY sensitive to smell. My partner works as a tax preparer and some of their clients would wear extremely heavy perfume/cologne. During tax season they work extremely long hours (sometimes 9AM - 9PM six days a week) so I do a lot of their laundry to ease the load. It kinda became a fun game for me to try and figure out the client patterns based on perfume smells left on the laundry. I was almost always right. Maybe that’s weird, but I would never suspect infidelity from a smell because I can smell EVERYTHING 😂
Same here, only my partner teaches high school bio. She occasionally comes home smelling like secondhand teenage male BO or Axe body spray if she interacts with some particular students for too long, and it gives me weird horror flashbacks.
i love it when heterosexual couples perpetuate the age-old tradition of the husband being an idiot child who makes awooga eyes at literally any woman and the wife being his mother who forgot corporal punishment was illegal. thanks for sharing this tutorial :)
Hi Jarvis! In most states (excluding Nebraska and Kentucky), there is actually a section at the bottom of the marriage certificate that states you MUST lick your silverware clean then put it back in the drawer when your wife isn’t looking. A judge will automatically grant a divorce if dish soap is used in private by a husband. Of course this rule doesn’t apply to same-sex marriages. Hope this helps 😊
I hate that I live in lawless Kentucky, because my husband keeps on washing dishes behind my back. He denies it, but I keep on finding unaccounted for silverware in our dishwasher. Disgusting. But, every time I try to divorce him for it the judge wags their little finger and says “no dice”.
Can come, was arrested 2 weeks ago because my wife found out I did the dishes on my own. Finally got out, I was a hero, may have to do it again to go back.
@@a-goblin i sincerely regret my ignorant vocabulary it is not true to my character to misrepresent a populous of marginalized persons and i will henceforth be more mindful of the way my words can be interpreted i understand my immense platform can be vicious and i apologize for any unnecessary hatred directed towards your people that my comment may have caused i will be sure to post a thorough 5 hour long apology video with blood and sweat and tears and spit and bile. i will be soaking wet thanks to my wife who has taken to blasting me in my stupid face with a garden hose when she detects my saliva on her silverware
@@a-goblin it is not of my character to misrepresent a populous of persons i understand my immense audience can be viscous i condemn any unnecessary hate that may have been directed towards your people due to my misinterpreted misinformed comment i will be releasing a five hour breakdown of this unfortunate situation with tears, sweat, spit, soaking wet because my wife has taken to blasting me in my evil face with a garden hose when she detects my saliva on her silverware
I'm really glad Jarvis is bringing the marriage debuffs up, but please also remember that you and your partner can benefit from +2 ac for 7 whole days if your wedding is performed by an appropriately certified cleric.
me & my wife actually have a new wedding every sunday to renew the buff. its expensive but when youre doing an ironman run i think its definitely worth it
I have actually had the moment of getting in my partner's car and smelling someone else's perfume. I just asked "was there someone else in the car?" and they answered "yeah, my coworker and I picked up lunch today." and I just went, "ah. I can smell their perfume." and that was the end of it. Shockingly, I don't freak out at the fact that my partner was around another woman.
POV: it's the middle of the night. you're in your room, trying to sleep. but you can't. why not? you hear something calling out to you. you don't want to go, but it starts to get louder, so you leave the comfort of your bed, and you hear it in it's entirety. "GOOOOOOOOOOOLD"
Love that Jarvis uses that it’s actually a producer tag like “metroboomin want some more” “zaytoven” etc. the whole thing is “I love gooooold” it’s on a bunch of Father songs, young bans, lucki, thouxanbanfauni, other atl artists. Oh and wintertime. Look up thotties or U can’t
i can confirm, i am married and i, too, am brutally mean to my husband and do totally not scripted pranks where the phone is right in his face but miraculously he doesn't see it
Would like to agree. I regularly cheat on my wife to the point where she inspects my car upon entering and is physically abusive due to the emotional trauma I've given her 🥰
The "remote" for the electric phone case at 16:01 is literally a garage door opener, my parents have that exact remote. So yeah, definitely a completely real prank they did there.
Jarvis I saw you recently on Creators for Palestine and I just want to say as an Arab and a fellow victim, thank you. I've been a fan of you since I was 15, I've watched your videos for a long time, and being an avid youtube viewer I've obviously watched many other creators. Many of them have broken my heart with their silence, some even by expressing approval of the dying people in Palestine, and I acknowledge that's completely my fault for forming a para-social relationship with them. Seeing you on creators of palestine warmed my heart though, because you cared, and that's so much more than I can say for so many creators I looked up to. I don't know if you'll read this, but thank you Jarvis, that meant a lot to me, and I know it meant a lot to so many others. Love you man❤
no I don’t care if I am married or not, anyone who uses and licks a spoon and just puts it back is diabolical. do people really do this??? there’s no way???
@@emilyjohn2034 Yeah, you don't need to clean the whole drawer, just because one used spoon somewhat touched the clean spoons. Just take it out after the skit and all's good. I'm not trying to be rude, but if you think that a slight touch with what remains after wiping saliva off of something, contaminates a whole drawer, you might have a problem. Also, if you EVER talk when putting away clean dishes, you have spit on your dishes.
I actually saw jarvis on a podcast once where he said claiming to be unmarried on his RUclips channels is actually a bit and that he's been happily married for 23 years.
@@cjtherou4427 Um he is at most in his early thirties how would he be married for 23 years? Child marriage? Not trying to be rude I am just saying that is probably not the truth
@@cjtherou4427 LOL! Pretty sure he's not old enough to be married for 23 years. Either you missed the joke or I missed your joke, one of us is missing the joke here.
@@dentxheadehh his house is also the office where they film the podcast, maybe it was one of the collaborators? Not that it matters either way, his business
Friends, my ex and I would prank each other by hiding a Twilight trading card in the other's things. (Wallets, socks, shoes, etc) Pranks can be very simple and not mean.
The trend I hate more is the infantilising "My wife reacts" videos. I don't knowbtheir names but I get a few pop up from different couples. On the surface they're cute, but the wife is always portrayed to be a sweet idiot and there are SO MANY with the same formula
Normalize having a good fun time and not getting angry at something or someone at the same time. I love the focus on keeping the content light and comedic as I think commentary channels get too mired in drama or general negativity for views and I just want fun stuff to watch in my free time when I’m not dealing with how drama filled and negative real life can be.
12:23 “The joke is that they hate each other.” 😂 As a single person, I also am getting these vibes. But as I’m not married I could be wrong. *edited for misspelling
What pisses me off is that these couples that hate each other and break the trust of their partner "as a joke" could get divorced but would rather make money off being in an unhealthy marriage
Tbf these are clearly skits that are plotted out and agreed upon in advance. If anyone couldn't tell just from the terrible acting, there are no real pranks happening here; these are clearly skits. So these videos don't really tell us anything about their actual marriage. They are just actors who happen to be in a relationship in real life also playing a couple in a social media show (think Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell in Overboard or the Christmas Chronicles 2).
I just got a job interview, then opened RUclips to find there's a new gold video, and now I feel like I can't trust how nice the universe is being to me rn
the amount of times jarvis is saying “ i’m single, i’m not married, i have no wife” is making me believe that he’s not single, he’s married, and he has a wife
Jarvis is so cute, hes gonna find his other half and i stg its gonna be so cute of a dynamic ❤️💖❤️ (PS thanks for the video while im recovering from oral surgery. In so much pain but at least ive got sm comfort ❤💕)
My mom actually has a car like that, where the seat moves automatically. The seats ALWAYS go to the default position when the car turns off, and go to the set position when you turn it on
I believe you can also set multiple programmed seat settings for multiple drivers. My parents looked at getting one like that because my dad is about a foot taller than my mom.
My brother have told me to move my car seat all the way back, if I ever leave it unattended for longer periods of time, cuz people who break into cars will often check the position of the seat and it's less likely they'll break into a car, if it looks like a big, scary dude is driving it.. I have a Toyota Yaris, tho, so I'm not entirely sure who he thinks I'd fool with this..
@@melaniemagolan2241 yeah! My ex’s mom got a BMW that did that and my ex was excited that he could set his own seat position since he’s a foot taller than his mom. Then she reminded him he wouldn’t be driving her car 😂
I’ll admit I’m not married yet. But I will be soon, and I can’t imagine doing these to my fiancée. When she’s not around, I think of her and hope she’s doing well. I try to make her life easier, even when she offhandedly mentions something to me and I’ll try to see if I can fix it. That’s what love is babey!
Can confirm. Am married. Wife bad. Am I right fellas? Edit: my wife caught me writing this comment and made me say we are in love and we are in a completely healthy relationship until death do us part which I hope comes soon.
6:52 car seat thing - some cars have automatic seats that adjust to the key fob or memory button. So if you have 2 different drivers for one car it remembers the saved seat positions and automatically adjusts for the drivers dependant on the fob/button. To my knowledge, they don’t go back to a neutral position, where ever the seat was last adjusted to is where it’ll stay until the vehicle is started with a fob that has a saved seat position. She would have set the seat to sit all the way up, pressed the seat memory button to save it, then put the seat in a position similar to how he normally has it, so that when he comes and pushes his seat button, the seat goes all the way up.
My sister's car does go to a neutral place when you park and goes to the preset when you start the car and at that point you can choose to change to a different persons setting
The central theme of the prank is that the seat moved while ALSO significantly lowering the husband’s IQ and disabling his central nervous system. Hilarious!!!!
loving the therapy on my social anxiety via reminding me that people i feel embarrassed around probably make bot-like tiktok comments. i don't mind at all bc i also make bot-like tiktok comments but it sure made me feel better about being embarrassed.
0:55 Jarvis's secret partner in the background putting their socks on display for the whole world to display. If only Bombas knew of the untapped marketing potential 😔
he's talked about how he likes to have someone there producing/listening when he does his unscripted content. it could also just be one of his many friends lol
Jarvis you can't put these Magic cards in the corner of the frame and not expect me to spend half the video trying to puzzle out exactly which cards they are.
@@Yessica13 I did catch, yeah. A truly wild move but hey sometimes you want to be swimming in cards. Excited to see which Magic actual-play shows he is guesting on, though I wouldn’t want to speculate for fear of even the appearance of him breaking a formal or informal NDA.
The driver's seat in my car changes position when I put the key in the ignition or take it out. There are three settings that I can customize and the buttons to change the seat according to that setting is on the door. My car is a Ford from like 2015, so it's not a fancy car thing. It looked like he was just starting the car by pushing the button lol.
as a wife, I can only confirm I have never been mean to my husband for fun. Why do it? I don't see cruelty toward the person you supposedly love most in the world as funny at all.
I assumed it was just for inclusivity purposes for the sake of the video, or just like a being self aware that you could always a find a guy who's interesting to you
noooo because the "locking a speaker in the bag" "prank" would have actually made me cry. that shit's *distressing*, and i don't know why people find it funny.
that's also wildly inappropriate, like they're in a grocery store, there's def children there. it could've been so many other sounds that might have actually given it a chance at being funny, but no, has to pick moaning. also so dumb that she "realized" the sound was coming from her so she left instead of looking in her bag and handing him the speaker. I would not be embarrassed, I would hand him the speaker. obv it's staged for the content but still, so annoying to even watch
@@amberevol i'm easily overwhelmed, so i wouldn't have been able to do much except cry and plead, honestly. but yeah, the fact that it's staged almost makes it worse imo; they both willingly walked into that store knowing EXACTLY what was going to happen, and what they would subject the people around them to. and like you said: there's definitely kids in there, which adds a whole extra layer to the shittiness.
I honestly loved the casual use of the word sonder, that's always been my favorite from the dictionary of obscure sorrows and it makes me happy to encounter it in the wild
![[#2024MAMA] ROSÉ (로제), Bruno Mars - APT. | Mnet 241122 방송](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/dgGqD28J6aQ/mqdefault.jpg)
Licking all over the silverware and then putting it back in to mingle with all the other utensils feels like bioterrorism
Right, I feel like everyone would get sick
If I found out someone in my house did that, I'd be in jail.
Memes aside, if he had covid but was asymptomatic (so didn’t know he had it), imagine how dinner would go.
Today's Mission: At your friend's house, lick as much silverware as you can while they aren't looking
I would vomit if someone’s mouth was on my spoon and it wasn’t washed between people.
“Why won’t the new generation get married” it’s not commitment we fear. It’s the pranks
that and the reaction time debuff
😭@@jakethejake1772
@@jakethejake1772 I got married once and when someone was trying to shoot the president, I (obviously) shouted "Mr president!" and tried to dive and take the bullet for him, but due to my reaction time debuff I was too late and the president died. The shooter went on to become Morgan Freeman and I filed for divorce.
@@HaloTropical You're so brave, thank you!
@@HaloTropicalWhy did I read all that 😂😂
I love that the first one is just "When my wife isn't watching, I'm disgustingly unhygienic!!" like he thinks that single people just don't wash their cutlery??
Yeah that was just plain disgusting
Uh yeah, plenty of dudes out there do this kind of shit and see no issue with it
You definitely don't eat at everybody house 😭😭😭
@Cathuulord 🤢🤢🤢
dude that was so nastyyy
As an empath, I'm getting the sense that Jarvis is not married and is actually single
We all saw that foot in the left corner of the frame though. He might be trying to throw us off the trail
@@alicemakarevich6762your onto something he is gaslighting us
As an empath get fucked
literally read this as he was saying he was not married
In case any men need to hear this: your wife or partner hitting you, hurting you, or causing you constant emotional distress, IS ABUSE. it is not okay. that is not a safe relationship. please get out as soon as you can.
saying this because I spoke to a friend recently who seemed to not understand that they were being actively abused because they are male and their female spouse was hitting them regularly but "it didn't hurt that much" 💀
for clarity that is not the point. if their intent is to physically or psychologically harm you, THAT IS ABUSIVE.
seconding this because ive had to have the same conversation with other guys before!!!!! hitting isnt okay, it isnt okay when kids do it, it isnt okay when parents do it, and it isnt okay between partners of any arrangement!!!!! we developed languages because hitting is the worst way to communicate an emotion to someone, and hurting someone doesnt resolve anything.
The way that people act like being made to maintain a normal standard of cleanliness like you're indeed a human and not a swamp monster is a form of torture, but see nothing wrong with being hit by their wife is indeed crazy
Thank you! You are absolutely right. I was in an abusive relationship like your friend. I first also didn't realize how bad she was. Cause I am 1,9m and she was only 1,64m. She was lighter and weaker then me. I didn't take it seriously until she attacked me with a knife. My friends and family helped me to get out. The worst was that she always threatend to hurt herself and call the cops on me. It took me far too long to realize how toxic this relationship was.
Little clarification: They don't need to *intent* to harm you for it to be considered abuse. I think it's more accurate to say that abuse is when an individual is treated with cruelty or mistreated regardless of the abuser's intention.
Many abusers don't intend to abuse, sometimes they genuinely think they're doing not doing wrong, sometimes they can't regulate their emotions and they do things they don't mean, sometimes there's another reason.
Eg. Many parents who use physical punishment do it because they see it as the best parenting method to teach kids respect. They don't see it as cruel, but rather a necessary evil. It is still abuse.
I think the belittlement of male DA victims stems from misogyny in many ways. Since people perceive women as weaker, they attribute blame onto the man for "letting" her hit him.
By vilifying women to be jealous, possessive and violent creatures, men who absorbed this distorted idea of female behavior are far more likely to think it's typical, and tolerate the abuse.
Please, please, do not accept violence from a significant other, regardless of gender.
People like this couple poison the social development of our youth.
When my wife isn't watching, I revert back to my true form as a disgusting swamp monster. It is a curse a witch cast upon me. Only the gaze of my true love can allow me to take the form of a human.
was your wife watching while you typed this or does your swamp monster form have opposable thumbs small enough to type on a screen or keyboard
That's beautiful
@@Retcon404You're beautiful*
@@myrtles1493I'm beautiful*
Cute
As a married person, I have never once felt this sort of malice towards my husband. My husband literally only ever tries to make me feel as happy and comfortable as possible. I can't imagine being in a relationship where, even just for the bit, you hate your spouse. It's so toxic and antiquated.
I believe ur just doing it right 🙏💖❤
Some straights only get married because "thats what youre supposed to do" and this is the result
100% Why get married if you hate your spouse?
Right? My husband is my best friend. When people are like "Ugh, the old ball and chain" I don't get it
Do they not like their partner?
As a non-married person, I still can't imagine hating my partner that much. It's like, at that point, can I go back to being single pls? 🤣
I think the worst part is that I'm a bisexual woman, and all the time I see bisexual women on the internet outright bashing men and mocking their boyfriends. And it's like, ladies, isn't this exactly what sexist men do to us? And even worse still, is those same women are kind of misogynistic for not just.. dating a woman instead? Why bother identifying as bisexual if you only date the gender you complain about the most? Lately I've found out that I'd much rather be with a woman because yeah, men do have certain types of problems that I'm not patient enough to handle--and that's totally fine! I'm not going to fault men for that.
I find that the "I hate my wife" type of "humor" has evolved into people hating their partners for any arbitrary reason, and it's sad af. I always feel bad for the partner, never for the one complaining.
two things i learned from this video
1. jarvis is single and not married (not that sure though jarvis needs to clarify)
2. couple humor is great and jarvis loves it very much
This accurate!
Beautiful pfp 😻
@@viv7677 thanks 🥰
Wait he's not married and single??? Shit i missed that part. Time for a rewatch
He's also not a lawyer
I appreciate that this type of content draws a bunch of people saying that it isn't okay for women to be violent towards their husbands/boyfriends, but I'm pleading with y'all to also recognize that depictions of irrationally angry, demanding wives/girlfriends are often misogynistic strawmen created by men to frame women as unreasonable bullies when they're actually just asking for help around the house, to have their emotional needs taken seriously, to not be cheated on, etc. (And the women who go along with this depiction do so because they're convinced that this is just how all men and heterosexual relationships are hardwired to be.)
Yupppp
So glad someone said it
Yup
Both can be true
Paul and Matthew are the only couple whose pranks I enjoy, and they're not even a prank channel. For those who don't know them, Paul is blind and Matthew just messes with him by doing things like surrounding him with plushies while he's asleep, swapping places with Paul's guide dog Mr Maple (harness and all) while Paul grabs something from the other room, keeps speaking from different parts of the room, etc.
Nothing harmful, they're both having fun, Mr Maple joins in on the fun and Paul also has his own fun with Matthew as well.
They are the only couple pranks I watch when they come up
@@caithenry8429 yeah same. And Mr Maple just wagging his tail and bringing toys to the fun or grabbing something and bolting just makes it even better
I love that channel they are so cute
"Why do they marry if they do not love?" sounded so earnest 😂😂😂
just straight things
I read this comment at the exact moment he was saying it so weird
@@joryballardbro how did we do that😂did the same thing
“Yes Father Jarvis”, we all cry in glorious unison.
It's DADDY
@@lungse.2565 no thank you
Yes Father Jarvis 🗣️🗣️
Yes Father Jarvis
Yes Father Jarvis
“why do they marry if they do not love” was said so earnestly into the camera 😭
As a non-married person who is single I can relate to Jarvis' situation, as I am also not married, and single.
Ok the perfume one made me laugh! I am EXTREMELY sensitive to smell. My partner works as a tax preparer and some of their clients would wear extremely heavy perfume/cologne. During tax season they work extremely long hours (sometimes 9AM - 9PM six days a week) so I do a lot of their laundry to ease the load. It kinda became a fun game for me to try and figure out the client patterns based on perfume smells left on the laundry. I was almost always right. Maybe that’s weird, but I would never suspect infidelity from a smell because I can smell EVERYTHING 😂
Also I trust them so much I would never suspect infidelity in the first place 😂 this smells only being a fun game
Same here, only my partner teaches high school bio. She occasionally comes home smelling like secondhand teenage male BO or Axe body spray if she interacts with some particular students for too long, and it gives me weird horror flashbacks.
i love it when heterosexual couples perpetuate the age-old tradition of the husband being an idiot child who makes awooga eyes at literally any woman and the wife being his mother who forgot corporal punishment was illegal. thanks for sharing this tutorial :)
The Two Genders: Immature vs Mean
also the tradition of marriage being a miserable thing that makes you hate your spouse and actively look for ways to piss them off.
It's got nothing to do with heterosexuality, it's just crappy low tier comedy
King baby
They should make a stereotype where people get divorced when they don't love eachother
“I personally am staying single to keep my reaction speed up.”
I’m GOING to use this from now on.
I respectfully give Jarvis the position of my father figure since my parents are now divorced after they pulled these pranks
Aaaaand I could be the mother figure! For.. for no certain reason. At all. 💗💞 /j
Same bro Jarvis is the best dad ever so glad to have you as my sibling
Never using emojis anymore, only saying "rotated 45 degrees crying laughing emoji"
Can you imagine getting married is like joining snl where you're constantly discussing what the next skit is going to be?
I really can't 😅
Hi Jarvis! In most states (excluding Nebraska and Kentucky), there is actually a section at the bottom of the marriage certificate that states you MUST lick your silverware clean then put it back in the drawer when your wife isn’t looking. A judge will automatically grant a divorce if dish soap is used in private by a husband. Of course this rule doesn’t apply to same-sex marriages. Hope this helps 😊
I hate that I live in lawless Kentucky, because my husband keeps on washing dishes behind my back. He denies it, but I keep on finding unaccounted for silverware in our dishwasher. Disgusting. But, every time I try to divorce him for it the judge wags their little finger and says “no dice”.
The one time I’m actually grateful for living in Nebraska
I love breaking the law by licking the dishes and putting them back while in a gay relationship! I will never be caught!
Can come, was arrested 2 weeks ago because my wife found out I did the dishes on my own. Finally got out, I was a hero, may have to do it again to go back.
The first video of the husband licking the silverware and putting it back unlocked a new fear in me. I will never trust anything again
when my wife isnt around i also become a nasty freak goblin. so glad ive found this relatable content through my premium media provider
Never go full goblin mode
@@adeer87 At least not when the wife's around.
please don't generalize, some of us are very hygienic thank you
@@a-goblin i sincerely regret my ignorant vocabulary it is not true to my character to misrepresent a populous of marginalized persons and i will henceforth be more mindful of the way my words can be interpreted i understand my immense platform can be vicious and i apologize for any unnecessary hatred directed towards your people that my comment may have caused i will be sure to post a thorough 5 hour long apology video with blood and sweat and tears and spit and bile. i will be soaking wet thanks to my wife who has taken to blasting me in my stupid face with a garden hose when she detects my saliva on her silverware
@@a-goblin it is not of my character to misrepresent a populous of persons i understand my immense audience can be viscous i condemn any unnecessary hate that may have been directed towards your people due to my misinterpreted misinformed comment i will be releasing a five hour breakdown of this unfortunate situation with tears, sweat, spit, soaking wet because my wife has taken to blasting me in my evil face with a garden hose when she detects my saliva on her silverware
I'm really glad Jarvis is bringing the marriage debuffs up, but please also remember that you and your partner can benefit from +2 ac for 7 whole days if your wedding is performed by an appropriately certified cleric.
me & my wife actually have a new wedding every sunday to renew the buff. its expensive but when youre doing an ironman run i think its definitely worth it
It’s also important to keep in mind that you can negate the debuffs if you select the “bisexual” perk before initiating the event
I have actually had the moment of getting in my partner's car and smelling someone else's perfume. I just asked "was there someone else in the car?" and they answered "yeah, my coworker and I picked up lunch today." and I just went, "ah. I can smell their perfume." and that was the end of it. Shockingly, I don't freak out at the fact that my partner was around another woman.
emotional security 🙏🏻 cos jealousy is so childish!!!
POV: it's the middle of the night. you're in your room, trying to sleep. but you can't. why not? you hear something calling out to you. you don't want to go, but it starts to get louder, so you leave the comfort of your bed, and you hear it in it's entirety. "GOOOOOOOOOOOLD"
Did gold member break into your house?
@@redwiltshire1816 I don't know. I don't know anything anymore. all I know is that it's never ending. a constant source of pain and fear.
@@greenland_shark_2009 I’m so sorry friend but it’s too late for you it’s only a matter of time before you become GOOOOOOLD!
Love that Jarvis uses that it’s actually a producer tag like “metroboomin want some more” “zaytoven” etc. the whole thing is “I love gooooold” it’s on a bunch of Father songs, young bans, lucki, thouxanbanfauni, other atl artists. Oh and wintertime. Look up thotties or U can’t
i can confirm, i am married and i, too, am brutally mean to my husband and do totally not scripted pranks where the phone is right in his face but miraculously he doesn't see it
Would like to agree. I regularly cheat on my wife to the point where she inspects my car upon entering and is physically abusive due to the emotional trauma I've given her 🥰
@@snoozlewoozleThe American dream
intimate partner violence is very funny and cool to joke about
when you cheat on your wife with an elden ring perfumer (they have covered my car in poisons and we are both slowly dying)
This whole video is just Jarvis telling us he’s ready to get married
It was like a coming out party for him. He's on the marriage market! Come and get him!
SHE JARVIS ON MY JOHNSON TILL I GOLD *we all say in unisons*
we're all just goldmaxxing at the end of the day :)
D-do we have to?
@@adeer87 YES
she sad on my boys til i night
@@adeer87c'mon we are premium viewers
The fact that the advertisement under this video was “GOLD, a journey with Idris Elba” might be the best thing I’ve ever seen.
Mine was for cat food 😢
@@GangstaWafflez
Mine was health insurance :/
Mine was a huwai smart watch but i confuse my data collection on purpose
Certain Folding Ideas video comes to mind
@@volodyadykun6490 Another viewer of taste, I see.
The "remote" for the electric phone case at 16:01 is literally a garage door opener, my parents have that exact remote. So yeah, definitely a completely real prank they did there.
I have the same one
"these people are all around us" is ominous af
Jarvis I saw you recently on Creators for Palestine and I just want to say as an Arab and a fellow victim, thank you.
I've been a fan of you since I was 15, I've watched your videos for a long time, and being an avid youtube viewer I've obviously watched many other creators. Many of them have broken my heart with their silence, some even by expressing approval of the dying people in Palestine, and I acknowledge that's completely my fault for forming a para-social relationship with them.
Seeing you on creators of palestine warmed my heart though, because you cared, and that's so much more than I can say for so many creators I looked up to.
I don't know if you'll read this, but thank you Jarvis, that meant a lot to me, and I know it meant a lot to so many others.
Love you man❤
no I don’t care if I am married or not, anyone who uses and licks a spoon and just puts it back is diabolical.
do people really do this??? there’s no way???
Friends have a skit about this years ago about a manbaby (Joey) using a spoon then licks it then put it back in the drawer, but he's a bachelor
Even for the skit he still put the nasty spoon back in the drawer and you know he didn’t clean the whole drawer after
@@emilyjohn2034 Yeah, you don't need to clean the whole drawer, just because one used spoon somewhat touched the clean spoons. Just take it out after the skit and all's good.
I'm not trying to be rude, but if you think that a slight touch with what remains after wiping saliva off of something, contaminates a whole drawer, you might have a problem.
Also, if you EVER talk when putting away clean dishes, you have spit on your dishes.
@@stellviahohenheim But he liked and he put
I live alone. No :)
i love you jarvis please don’t die
i feel like that’s a threat
love this
No promises
jarvis please don't react to boyfriend pov content at 2 pm in two weeks time while eating a singular plain triple cheeseburger at mcdonalds
@@aidanlewis3653 we'll see
I love how mysterious Jarvis is about his relationship status. Really keeping us guessing.
I actually saw jarvis on a podcast once where he said claiming to be unmarried on his RUclips channels is actually a bit and that he's been happily married for 23 years.
@@cjtherou4427 Um he is at most in his early thirties how would he be married for 23 years? Child marriage? Not trying to be rude I am just saying that is probably not the truth
@@cjtherou4427 LOL! Pretty sure he's not old enough to be married for 23 years. Either you missed the joke or I missed your joke, one of us is missing the joke here.
it's funny he mentions it so often because there's a foot in the bottom left corner for the first bit of the video. wonder who it was
@@dentxheadehh his house is also the office where they film the podcast, maybe it was one of the collaborators? Not that it matters either way, his business
“I need to get married and prank my wife- or my husband- or my partner”
I love that for you Jarvis ❤️❤️❤️
1:03 Jarvis who’s grippers are wiggling around in the corner
I didn’t even notice them
Friends, my ex and I would prank each other by hiding a Twilight trading card in the other's things. (Wallets, socks, shoes, etc) Pranks can be very simple and not mean.
Twilight had trading cards?!?
@@caithenry8429 they did! They were dumb! It was definitely an Edward one we used. 😂
@@caithenry8429 seriously, talk about a buried lede, lol
"Baffle, not abuse" is the mark of a true prank vs just bullying for laughs
@@caithenry8429 they sure did! They were very stupid. 😂
ngl abusive relationship “comedy” is like boomer humor revamped for millennials
"Millennials" even though all the viewers are 11 and the people in the videos are gen z?
@@FrenkTheJoy Yeah, that tracks, actually..
@@FrenkTheJoy i believe those comments are bots mostly
The trend I hate more is the infantilising "My wife reacts" videos. I don't knowbtheir names but I get a few pop up from different couples. On the surface they're cute, but the wife is always portrayed to be a sweet idiot and there are SO MANY with the same formula
Boomer humour at least tries to tell a joke. This is just a depiction of abuse, and the joke is supposed to be that the man is the victim.
I'm gonna preface every opinion I have with "not married" now because of Jarvis
"The Johnson" would be a hilarious welcome mat though
Normalize having a good fun time and not getting angry at something or someone at the same time. I love the focus on keeping the content light and comedic as I think commentary channels get too mired in drama or general negativity for views and I just want fun stuff to watch in my free time when I’m not dealing with how drama filled and negative real life can be.
I love when married people act like they're roommates and not in love!
Not even good roomates, it's the roomates that force themselves to hang out even though they don't like each other just cuz they live the same place
@@Lemoncakelover678 LITERALLY
They don't act like roommates! Hitting your roommate is socially unacceptable
I think a lot of it is an act (it also speaks volumes that kids watch it) but like...why would you even post things like this..
@@Lemoncakelover678 YUPPP
12:23 “The joke is that they hate each other.” 😂 As a single person, I also am getting these vibes. But as I’m not married I could be wrong.
*edited for misspelling
I don’t understand why anyone would be okay being portrayed as an abusive spouse? Like haha funny funny joke guys.
You nailed it with 2013 insta comedy videos. It's probably those same people just older and married with the same humor level
"I'm not [ ] so what do I know?"
Thats me with so many topics lmfao
What pisses me off is that these couples that hate each other and break the trust of their partner "as a joke" could get divorced but would rather make money off being in an unhealthy marriage
I bet outside videos they rarely talk about anything other than content
the craziest part about it is that they could get divorced and still make these videos but they chose not to 🤦🏽♀️
Tbf these are clearly skits that are plotted out and agreed upon in advance. If anyone couldn't tell just from the terrible acting, there are no real pranks happening here; these are clearly skits. So these videos don't really tell us anything about their actual marriage. They are just actors who happen to be in a relationship in real life also playing a couple in a social media show (think Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell in Overboard or the Christmas Chronicles 2).
I just got a job interview, then opened RUclips to find there's a new gold video, and now I feel like I can't trust how nice the universe is being to me rn
Omg good luck!!
Ooh! I hope it goes amazing for you!
Banana Joe
🤞 good luck!
The level of sarcasm in this video is so high I feel like we've gone full circle and I'm not sure anymore if it's sarcasm
That's how the comments feel too
the amount of times jarvis is saying “ i’m single, i’m not married, i have no wife” is making me believe that he’s not single, he’s married, and he has a wife
Hating your spouse is the highest form of comedy.
my favorite part of their videos is how real and not staged they are
Jarvis saying “The Johnson! Just one” as if Dipper doesn’t live there too
his name is dipper gold, hes premium you ass.
1:29 "...I'm not married so I wouldn't know 🤔" after watching the most heinous act I have ever witnessed
I have no idea why but the sock in the bottom left corner at 1:12 frightened me for no reason.
Jarvis is so cute, hes gonna find his other half and i stg its gonna be so cute of a dynamic ❤️💖❤️ (PS thanks for the video while im recovering from oral surgery. In so much pain but at least ive got sm comfort ❤💕)
My mom actually has a car like that, where the seat moves automatically. The seats ALWAYS go to the default position when the car turns off, and go to the set position when you turn it on
I believe you can also set multiple programmed seat settings for multiple drivers. My parents looked at getting one like that because my dad is about a foot taller than my mom.
My brother have told me to move my car seat all the way back, if I ever leave it unattended for longer periods of time, cuz people who break into cars will often check the position of the seat and it's less likely they'll break into a car, if it looks like a big, scary dude is driving it.. I have a Toyota Yaris, tho, so I'm not entirely sure who he thinks I'd fool with this..
@@melaniemagolan2241 yeah! My ex’s mom got a BMW that did that and my ex was excited that he could set his own seat position since he’s a foot taller than his mom. Then she reminded him he wouldn’t be driving her car 😂
That tampax video is a beat for beat recreation of a vine from like... 2014
I was just coming to the comments to see if anyone else remembered that it's an old vine joke. They can't even be original in their awful comedy
Wake up babe, Jarvis is unveiling horrors beyond human comprehension.
I’ll admit I’m not married yet. But I will be soon, and I can’t imagine doing these to my fiancée. When she’s not around, I think of her and hope she’s doing well. I try to make her life easier, even when she offhandedly mentions something to me and I’ll try to see if I can fix it. That’s what love is babey!
"Tactical Tampon" is going to be my new gamertag. Thanks, Jarvis! lol
Things taken from this video:
1. I think Jarvis might not be married
2. "These people are all around us"
16:20"why do they marry if they do not love?😔"
Can confirm. Am married. Wife bad. Am I right fellas?
Edit: my wife caught me writing this comment and made me say we are in love and we are in a completely healthy relationship until death do us part which I hope comes soon.
WHICH YOU HOPE COMES SOON?
WHICH YOU HOPE COMES SOON?
WHICH YOU HOPE COMES SOON?
WHICH YOU HOPE COMES SOON?
WHICH YOU HOPE COMES SOON?
Jarvis PLEEEASE don't get into a terrible accident with a big massive truck running over your torso please
“tactical tampon” is now my new favorite phrase 😂
6:52 car seat thing - some cars have automatic seats that adjust to the key fob or memory button. So if you have 2 different drivers for one car it remembers the saved seat positions and automatically adjusts for the drivers dependant on the fob/button. To my knowledge, they don’t go back to a neutral position, where ever the seat was last adjusted to is where it’ll stay until the vehicle is started with a fob that has a saved seat position. She would have set the seat to sit all the way up, pressed the seat memory button to save it, then put the seat in a position similar to how he normally has it, so that when he comes and pushes his seat button, the seat goes all the way up.
My sister's car does go to a neutral place when you park and goes to the preset when you start the car and at that point you can choose to change to a different persons setting
Yeah, I drove a Kia that returned to neutral once.
The central theme of the prank is that the seat moved while ALSO significantly lowering the husband’s IQ and disabling his central nervous system. Hilarious!!!!
I picked the wrong day to play that drinking game where you take a drink every time Jarvis says, “I’m not married.” 😂
😂😂😂😂😂
LMAO
"we are premium" we all say in unison
I've been married for 3 years and my husband has never played a single prank on me... guess he doesn't really love me 😔
loving the therapy on my social anxiety via reminding me that people i feel embarrassed around probably make bot-like tiktok comments. i don't mind at all bc i also make bot-like tiktok comments but it sure made me feel better about being embarrassed.
Can confirm that marriage comes with a -5 debuff to reaction time
"Use a few words. Then murder."
- Jarvis, 2024
0:54 jarvis if there is someone beside you forcing you to watch these pls blink three times in the next video. we'll take it from there
LOL I SAW THAT TOO I WAS TRYING TO SEE WHO ELSE NOTICED
@@noamartinez2478 Sam here (not really). I think it's another RUclipsr cultured people know 🤓
@@MaximilianoWullbrand-Naddeo the only other person I assumed it would be is Jarvis, but with that joke, are you implying it’s Chad Chad?
OMG I SCROLLED SO MUCH SEARCHING FOR SOMEONE ELSE WHO NOTICED!!!!
People defending the sanctity of marriage. The marriage they're defending:
Did you know that adultery is actually against the law in about 20 states? It's not prosecuted very often, but yeah, it's illegal.
Congrats on the marriage, Jarvis!
0:55 Jarvis's secret partner in the background putting their socks on display for the whole world to display. If only Bombas knew of the untapped marketing potential 😔
Ok good I’m glad someone else saw that!
I'm shocked more people haven't noticed??
he's talked about how he likes to have someone there producing/listening when he does his unscripted content. it could also just be one of his many friends lol
@@theycallmekid6917 yeah I assumed it was the same person who laughed at "women be shopping" later in the vid
The softiest of soft launches 😂
0:54 whos foot is that in the back 😭
jarvis you look so good! I’m loving the attractiveness level lately. (from an objective standpoint, i am a lesbian)
My marriage is in literal shambles at the moment and yet we're not this diabolical to one another
Jarvis you can't put these Magic cards in the corner of the frame and not expect me to spend half the video trying to puzzle out exactly which cards they are.
Like What is the spicy brew? I wanna know the Deck Tech
He said on his podcast recently that he bulk bought thousands of MTG cards and is slowly sorting through them.
@@Yessica13 I did catch, yeah. A truly wild move but hey sometimes you want to be swimming in cards. Excited to see which Magic actual-play shows he is guesting on, though I wouldn’t want to speculate for fear of even the appearance of him breaking a formal or informal NDA.
The driver's seat in my car changes position when I put the key in the ignition or take it out. There are three settings that I can customize and the buttons to change the seat according to that setting is on the door. My car is a Ford from like 2015, so it's not a fancy car thing. It looked like he was just starting the car by pushing the button lol.
Side note, The glasses, mustache, chain combo looks great on you!
as a wife, I can only confirm I have never been mean to my husband for fun. Why do it? I don't see cruelty toward the person you supposedly love most in the world as funny at all.
Wait wait wait, did Jarvis just acknowledge he's bisexual?? He said "if I ever have a wife, or a husband or a partner". Am I dumb? Lol
I noticed that too 👀
I think he is heterosexual , I believe he talked about it on the podcast
That's what I was wondering too. I'd love some more bi guy rep
I assumed it was just for inclusivity purposes for the sake of the video, or just like a being self aware that you could always a find a guy who's interesting to you
watching these videos always reminds me why my parents are divorced.
Because your father also licked the silverware?
@@southparkfireflyHe should be serving jail time for that actually i think.
Haha yes I love that all the punch lines are domestic violence 🙄
Emphasis on punch
mystery foot guest appearance in the corner at 0:54
the more you said you were single and unmarried the greater the urge to present myself as a contender. strong psychological manipulation skillz
noooo because the "locking a speaker in the bag" "prank" would have actually made me cry. that shit's *distressing*, and i don't know why people find it funny.
that's also wildly inappropriate, like they're in a grocery store, there's def children there. it could've been so many other sounds that might have actually given it a chance at being funny, but no, has to pick moaning.
also so dumb that she "realized" the sound was coming from her so she left instead of looking in her bag and handing him the speaker. I would not be embarrassed, I would hand him the speaker. obv it's staged for the content but still, so annoying to even watch
@@amberevol i'm easily overwhelmed, so i wouldn't have been able to do much except cry and plead, honestly.
but yeah, the fact that it's staged almost makes it worse imo; they both willingly walked into that store knowing EXACTLY what was going to happen, and what they would subject the people around them to. and like you said: there's definitely kids in there, which adds a whole extra layer to the shittiness.
@@amberevol that's why he put a lock on it, so she couldn't just take the speaker out. She could still have handed him the whole bag tho
this sonder bit is absolutely killing me. thank you jarvis
9:35 just imagined lifestyle bloggers saying 'nuppy' for nuptial partner the way they say hubby lmao
I honestly loved the casual use of the word sonder, that's always been my favorite from the dictionary of obscure sorrows and it makes me happy to encounter it in the wild
thank you for putting captions on every video :)
This video helped me get over my social anxiety more than my therapist. Jarvis, your check is in the mail