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- Опубликовано: 27 июн 2023
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/ monlenz
all the art for the monstergarden is grouped up here:
www.deviantart.com/monlenz/ga...
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This was riveting. I thought the Witch Hunter's dialogue was practically flawless
Dialogue tip: say it aloud to see if it sounds weird. This was really helpful when I wrote scripts and comic strips!
@@thenumber1procrastinator honestly I don't do this enough. I'll make sure to do that more
I have internet but.. riveting?
@@LORD-wr7rvI’m assuming you’re asking as a non-native English speaker. Riveting, as in holding of one’s attention. Possibly related, metaphorically, to the actual process of joining two metal plates via the peening of a hot bolt.
@@monlenz please keep it in this format. I love it, I was entranced. Just keep pushing through.
The terrifying thing about the conversation is just how seemingly calm the hunter is. He really does sound like someone who's unfortunately been roped into something he could have never imagined and has no way of ever getting back up. And at the same time, he sounds just unhinged enough to make your doubt his every word.
For me it hit that perfect old soldier atmosphere.
I'm glad you liked the dialog, I will iron it out more but i hope to keep the atmosphere
I really didn't get "maybe he's crazy". It seemed 100% like, "holy hell, witches are that much of a threat to humanity". Like, even that dead pause shows his humanity imo, where he knows he's made a wrong call (more than once) but it'd be better to accidentally roast 1000 innocents for the sake of 100000 innocents.
this makes me sit here like "bro how can I not be sure he's really a witch too" or something
like every pause and lack of response really makes me question my own safety even talking to him.
@@Malthizar if we consider what he’s saying about witches is true he’s probably right, baby witches by the hunters words corrupt and curse which would be bad enough but something tells me that once it sheds in human form we’re talking eldritch abomination territory.
The slight echo in his voice seems reasonable, since his mouth is inside a beak, I think his voice is flawless.
I’d love to hear some minor chattering of the beak as it moves with his jaw I think that’d really sell it. Doesn’t have to be every sound but maybe every syllable or so
@@retr0robbin I figured the beak doesn't clack. It's made for a bird's head, not for a Human's. His jaws aren't built for a beak. No, you just see his teeth clack and his gums writhe within the beak, the upper beak unmoving, the lower beak only moving with his lower jaw, unable to connect with its upper half. You see his jaws writhe in there; His lower jaw moves, then the lower beak follows. Is it connected? Is it loosely hanging off his face? Is it bone? Why is there flesh within it? How does he eat with it in the way?
It's a deformity. An invasive, obstructing mutation. Not an addition that helps or aids, an obstacle that hinders. Like a tumor on your face that refuses to kill you.
@@retr0robbin My thought currently on this creature: Jakob has his mandables (beak) clap and chatter that of Shoebill, while the sound it makes is that of a feeder Necromorph clicking it's jaws/ echolocation.
“Do you actually eat kids?”
“It depends… are you hungry? No? Then no”
Lmao
i love how we dont know if hes talking serious or just messing with him
@@nunocampea2395 I think it's just messing, since they're already in such a sad and monstrous state, they have a very black humour about it all. It's likely they hear that rumour all the time wherever they go, so they just lean into it. I imagine they don't get to be very social outside their group, and that's why the joke sounds so matter of fact. Just my interpretation of course, love the lore
I really like the fact that the witch hunters are basically broken men, both physically and mentally, reduced to little more than deformed outcasts, pretty much they've got nothing to lose anymore
also his voice is amazing
Honestly its kinda refreshing usually the hunters of monsters are seen as heros but here there outcast and seen as monsters in their own right
Holy shit i feel like a few hundred of us are like astral-y alligned with this guy
Istg that's what it feels like
Well I'm glad you feel the same. It's just feelings I expect many creative have along their journey of art.
The allusion of Ruffus and Finn is horrifying. their names being said together, they never wanted to go without eachother... The imagination can be worse then a solid answer. 10/10 story telling.
they’re fused aren’t they
@@faberquidam probably
Finally someone acknowledges that sound editing is difficult! Usually the creators I watch don't talk about how they do their sounds, making it seem like it's so easy it's not even worth mentioning. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who struggles, makes it easier somehow.
its a nightmare. to find the sounds alone is hard but then all the mic qualities people use are different, and how to you make something sound farther away? or muffled? or so they dont overlap or over crowd each other. Its hard but i hope to get good at it.
@@monlenz If it doesn't exist, someone needs to make a spatial audio editor that lets you literally place audio in a scene using something like steam audio for binaural effects.
@@granitrocky1129 if that exists that would be an amazing tool to have
It might be possible in a game engine. I've heard of companies using unity or unreal for film or tv.
@@monlenz please make a video about redesigning Fantasy Giants please
your world and designs are endlessly captivating. Jakob’s voice sent chills down my spine, clearly you’re also a talented voice actor too!
Well if you lower it by a Semitone basically anything can sound good haha but thank you.
@@monlenzonly pitching your voice won’t get you far. That little laugh from Jakob after the question of what are witches was chilling and testament to your voice acting skills
Your authenticity is amazing! I absolutely love how you share everything about the process. I feel like you've also maxxed out your charisma :)
maxed out my charisma? well thank you for the compliment but i have no idea how i managed that. but thank you
@@monlenzYou’re honest and speak with conviction. Nothing more charismatic than that!
@@monlenzthank you for your hard work, I really appreciate it. 😌☺️😊😄😃🤩😍 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 ❤❤❤❤❤ ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖
@@zeppie_ conviction? I guess it's cuz of the script. In an actual non scripted call that all goes away haha
I watched one of your streams and I was surprised by how precise and thoughtful you were, when answering questions about parts of your world you had not fully developped yet.
That might be what some people see as conviction ? To me it's more like being well spoken, and thoughtful about your craft.
That few seconds of silence after he was asked if he guessed wrong was REALLY good!!! Love what that implied
What does it imply
@@theslimeking777that perhaps he hadn't considered that before, that he may have killed innocent people
@@theslimeking777or even that it happens so much that he's too ashamed to admit
That he guessed wrong and got hit. And if it is worth risking innocents, killing innocents to avoid that from happening again
@@LaCasaDeAsha I think it's more that he knows he has, and has a hard time living with it. Such things trouble him greatly. He's not evil; He's surrounded by uncertainty. When reality can slip out from beneath you while on the job, you can never be certain. A young man who never thought he'd have to do such horrible things. Now old, and quick to subdue the trauma in any way he can. The madness helps yet hinders.
To put it simply, he knows. And no one has ever been bold enough to ask him the question he can't confront. It's enough to make a drunk go sober.
Dude, this is great, I barely heard a fan in the background at all. Don't stress out too much or be too perfectionist about what you're doing, everything gets perfected the more you do it, but this is already damn near perfect. Nothing else needed in my opinion. Keep up the good work, don't stress too much about the little things, and we'll be here waiting for the next episode!
All great world builders are perfectionists in my experience but also it can mean they don't get to share their work with the world
The Voice and sound effects sent chills down my spine
Literal chills
Monster garden never fails to impress
for real yes
There is a youtuber, Alfabusa, who made the Warhammer 40k fan series 'What If the Emporer Had a Text-to-Speech Device'. He and his team make a lot of audio-dramas -- basically conversations between two or more people with little animation -- that are very well done. Take a look at his work, maybe it'll give you some ideas for future projects.
Fellow Alfabusa fan I see.
My favorite part is where he said "It's Monster'in time" and then garden'd all over the place
man... now i want to create a tree eating vampire druid, called either the gardener or Deciduos or Dr deciduos.
hm, i dont think deciduos would work, a villain that hits you with "its deciding time" can sound intimidating in the right surcomstances but then he goes and decides all over the place and thats just silly
The visual of Oma hovering above the platoon, her actions left unsaid is absolutely terrifying and dread instilling. The witch hunter is such a badass for wanting a rematch.
i absolutely love the hunters dialogue and style
he sounds calm and melancholic, yet still determined and kinda terrifying
i dont like the questions as much though, they feel kinda out of nowhere sometimes
i think in general this is an incredible piece of dialogue though
thank you for releasing it
He'll probably refine the audio make the questions feel more in world
The questions felt a lot like a scribe or reporter trying to get a full story
Agreed, the hunter feels very authentic yet the stranger to me sounds like a reallife reporter somehow. Stil awsome content.
I honestly cannot hear the fan noises, the audio is great. My only complaint is that the dialog at certain points doesn't feel completely natural but I have a feeling that that'll improve naturally over time (if you're really worried about the background noise, maybe you could record 2 times, one at the beginning and end with no sound suppression and one in the middle with sound suppression? idk, I dont know about this stuff)
This conversation was written perfectly. There’s this vibe given off from the hunter. It seems like awkwardness on the surface but there’s so much depth to his words, like he wants to say something, like he has to think before he speaks. It’s such a realistic way of speaking.
I’m currently working on a project and i’ve just restarted for the third time and it’s nice to know you go through the same things as any of us. I would like to say tho, I think about your work a lot and you’ve become one of my favorites. I talk about you to my other art friends.
Lastly, is it far off to say that the stranger is simply a self-insert? Like to the denizens of this world he may seem like a mysterious man traveling and taking notes like a foreigner. But i feel like foreigner is an understatement. I would really like to get some scraps of the strangers background. Just enough to make me more curious.
same i want to know more about the stranger so much :[
"Like a movie but without the visuals" the term you're looking for is audio drama
The little breathy chuckles are so unnerving- It's one of the best most awful experiences. Great voice acting by the way! You were being too hard on yourself. This was a great experience!
Also that l o n g pause after he asked "Do you ever guess wrong?" is so freaky. Like- I'm just imagining this the bird guy with maggots crawling in and out of the bulbous mass where his eyes should be, staring with his mouth just a little too open. Staring this interviewer dead in the eyes and not saying a word. And then continuing with the conversation like nothing happened.
"it is fine to start again" - wise words. Thank you!
this is great, even with the small audio mixup! The atmosphere is on point, and i don't think it detracts enough to bring the listener out of immersion
You always seem so incredibly genuine and its great. Honest about failure, honest about being overwhelmed, honest about your feelings and yet you never seem to let it put you down. Your positivity is absolutely contagious.
honestly, this accident gave the Witch Hunter's voice such a character. It makes him even more unhinged. the dialog was very well written, and your voice acting is also very good. The whole thing is just amazing. if you wouldn't have said that his voice sounds so weird because of this technical problem, i would've thought it was deliberate. imagine: his voice sounds like it's coming from somewhere far away. Maybe it's stuck somewhere deep under his monster flesh with the remnants of his human consciousness.
also, his military clothing makes sense now. I loved your work! :)
This is amazing. Even though the witch hunter is cooperative and seemingly kind he seems like he would jump at you any second the more questions are asked the more possibly he will do it. You just can't be sure about your safety.
he sounds that hes in the verge of breaking down and is desperatly trying to hold himself together.
I don't hear a fan anywhere in the background, so I wouldn't worry. You've done a fantastic job editing these videos, I enjoy every one. It's rare to find another monster designer who likes the same kind of stuff as me.
WOW.
This... to me, my ears, was NOT a failure.
Even with just this one picture and a few soundeffects to set the scene, I was captivated and immersed and had the whole scene playing in my head. The Distortion on Jakobs voice was subtle but present enough to just give chills.
I don't think I understood every bit of the story on the first listen, but I'll sure give it another one when I'm less tired.
Honestly, the reverb on the voice kind of works, unless you're not going for a...kind of warped effect? It does sound really cool. Good acting, too. :3 This was a fun listen.
The dialogue was great! The witch hunter’s voice hits the perfect spot for a subtler kind of horror and tension, where you feel he might snap at any second without directly threatening the protagonist. I was wearing headphones so it gave me chills when the hunter spoke since it felt like his voice was kind of surrounding me on all sides
I think I get what you mean. Yakub sounds not like he'd go berserk, but more like he'd start rambling incoherently, start pacing around the room and speaking to someone that isn't there, or simply just forget what he was talking about mid-sentence and continue on a random topic (something I think happened when he was asked about Henry; he told the Traveler that they found him, and, after a moment of silence, Yakub seemingly starts to talk about a piece of bait or equipment that will help in their hunt, which is unrelated to Henry).
Like, not directly dangerous, but unstable and unsettling.
It's best to not struggle eternal against a sunk cost fallacy. This is fine!
It’s alright! We will wait for you to make something that you will be satisfied with, no worries, wish you the best, it’s alright that not everything will succeed, it’s just a part of the process, can’t wait to see more from you, good luck!
The fan actually gives kind of a creepy droning vibe that I like, barely noticable but actually adds to the atmosphere
Take your time! I’m sure it’ll be awesome
The silence and sarcastic non-answers are a great choice. Conveys both the Hunter's personality and the power dynamic in that room very eloquently. This was some clever writing, and great acting, by the way.
i loved this so much! you gave the witch hunter a perfect aura of ominousness. so calm and so terrifying just in the mannerisms and subtle things. and that silence after he was asked if they’ve ever guess wrong. that was wonderful! they exude the vibe of some folks who’ve both seen and done some awful, awful things.
You're doing something exceptionally difficult in trying to produce polished content in a setting and story that's still very much in active development. I think it's a cool idea to make these self-contained bubbles of more developed storytelling within the wider unwritten story. It reminds me of how a DM might set up one dungeon for the party without knowing much about the outside world and get ideas for the wider setting from how the players interact with that little slice of it.
Witch Hunters being cursed monsters is brilliant worldbuilding and so obvious in retrospect I don't know why I haven't thought of that. Of course they would be cursed! They hunt witches!
Btw. I think I only noticed the fan sounds because you brought it up. After a minute my brain completely ignored it and didn't hear it anymore.
Honestly if you didn't bring up the fact that there was a fan in the background i personally wouldn't have noticed. Would love to hear more about witches and witch hunters as well! Keep up the good work :D
1. Gonna be honest, what fan are you talking about?
I don't hear anything.
2. Good work.
Tbh the fan sounds like intentional background sound of a dissident humming that sounds kind of eerie
It is fine to start again, and I'm guessing that there are a lot of us doing the same, in fact, It was your work that inspired me at 40 to get back into creating, or maybe it was just the start of a midlife crisis. :)
I love this.
Often things that feel like mistakes can add a new layer of intrigue. Like with all artforms, trust your journey - allow your accidents to be happy ones.
The conversation is nothing less than terrifiying, there is only an still image and yet I can see the protagonist looking side to side when he asks about the myths people tell. The more horrifiying thing is he sounds like someone who doesn't deserve this fate, human after all. Damn, this is peak storytellin. Bravo
I don’t like how much I can feel his voice in my spine, please don’t stop! 😁😁😁
I don’t hear a fan in the witch-hunters lines. I think you might be to close to the project and your mind is convincing you that it’s not good enough. Maybe I’m wrong, I’d hate to get on a high horse, it’s just I notice I hate stuff I make for no particular reason just because I’ve been in front of it for too long. It sounds and looks great, if you don’t like it or think you could do better, I wish you good luck re-working it and I’m excited to see it. I love your work and please keep it up!
The way he sounds out of breath 24/7 and how his speech is impeded shows just how sick and ill witch hunters are. So much pain and struggle in every sentence that is uttered.
I like they way Yakob says that he made the tea, like he's very proud of his tea
man i love this guy, somehow he uploads every time i am checking youtube randomly
Man, I was so engrossed I forgot it was just a progress update and was waiting for the voice-over to continue
The idea of single handedly making a one episode audio drama short sounds so daunting😢
Huge props to you for even attempting this let alone releasing something you view as a "failed" product.💗💞💖💕
I listened to this with factorios ambient noise in the background. If you've never heard it it's basically wind sounds. Added a layer to this that I quite enjoyed, sounded like the wind was howling outside the barn
Honestly what you do is so good that it makes me feel my own work is shit. If your "bad" quality of work is THIS good then i imagine you could put something really amazing together with very little effort.
I'm fascinated by these characters and the world you have built. Your skill at sound design and creating atmosphere is also evident, a pleasure to listen to. I would love to have a full short story or even a series. Very excited to see where your project goes, thank you very much for your work ^^
The way his voice sounds distorted is terrifyingly wonderful. Like the way it trembles and sounds like it’d reverberates within your head or like through you
Holy crap, I love this! Jakob's voice is spine-chilling, and the hints of derangement in his voice.... I am torn between hearing more and running away as fast as possible. He's the perfect unreliable narrator, coating everything with his biases and perspective in such a way that I am terrified if he's right and yet instinctually can't trust him. I LOVE HIM!!!
Take all the time you need.
It's alright, it's a shame about the audio, but it was really gripping, Yakob's voice is great. We are eagerly waiting for anything you put out, but we are patient, don't worry about it. We also benefit from you learning :)
I'm trying to listen for the fan you mention in yakob voice and I gotta admit the slight buzz I think just fits with his bee hive like eyes. It sounds like there is simply a consistent buzzing coming from his figure.
Oh this guy is absolutely charming. Look at that beautifull smile.
Also you nailed the... Well i can only call it the witch hunter feel of this guy.
I think its fine but needs the background noises a little louder to make it feel less empty
Eu particularmente gostei. Acho que as vozes ficaram baixas, fica difícil de entender oque estão dizendo as vezes, alem dos problemas que você citou sobre a captação do áudio. Mas acho que foi um bom resultado.
Legal achar outro brasileiro nesse canal
i love the human teeth at the back of the bird beak. it isn't the first thing you notice because of the massive bird head and strange... eyes? but once you see them you realize "oh, that was a human". any design that tells you something new every time you look at it is clearly doing something right.
it's really good! (but it would be nice if you could enable the automated subtitles)
great video
Bro. You haven't even watched it.
@@ric12look at his username
@@ric12 thats the joke but now ive watched it
I couldnt even notice the fan on a causal viewing, had to really really listen in for any background noise to hear what it could be
I got so invested in what he was saying, i didnt even realize the image was rotating. Somehow makes it more unsettling. Good job!
New monster garden hell yeah
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Why can I translate this to English?
My guy, first you come out of nowhere with some of the most interesting and thought provoking monster/ character designs, now you're over here giving experienced voice actors a run for their money! I fully understand your concerns regarding background noise as an aspiring voice actor myself. However, you've done a masterful job covering any unintentional sounds with the scenic background audio. If you call this a "failure" my hopes at becoming a successful voice actor might be in vain!
Jokes aside, this was wonderful and i loved every second of it. Keep on keepin up good sir.
HOLY FUCKING SHIT THE PART WHERE THE EXPLORER SAYS "Have you ever guessed wrong?" and then the entire scene goes into silence followed with the "Did you actually eat kids?" and then the weird sounds IS HELLA CLEAN
THIS SHIT GAVE ME SHIVERS, GOOD JOB :D
I think what you nailed was the feeling of nervousness. For one in the interviewer, but also in the witch hunter, which makes a lot of sense, since everyone avoids them, they don't have people to talk to. So as listener it begs the question if it's in general just really difficult to describe how you can tell witches apart from other people, if it's more of a paranoia or if the hunter just lacks the social skill to properly explain it. At least that's how I read it.
Holy cow, that’s super eerie. And I am invested now!
Dude, I totally know how you feel--I spent a whole year straight doing storyboards and then had to start all over. But take it from me--this is great and I can't even hear the fan at all!!!
I just found ur videos and had caught up watching all of them only for you to post this!! Im really excited to see what you have planned, and take so much inspo from your work (im trying to improve my own loseness and concept work). Take all the time you need; i know motivation can be a tricky thing, but dont burn yourself out! Im so excited to hear more from our storyseeker and jacob!!
I can tell what parts you're talking about, but the narrative structure of the conversation is so enthralling I only recognize it in retrospect. Great writing!
I frigging loved it. The way The witch hunter talked was just great
Your work is so inspiring, I genuinely lack the words. I've been stuck with two years of writers block but watching your videos has somehow "unstuck" my brain! Thank you so much I'm so excited to see this channel grow
This is sooooo great! I could listen to this conversation for hours! So interesting, because you feel like you're figuring it out with the Storyteller together
As artists we can be incredibly harsh on our own work especially things we care about. I’m glad you posted this and I hope you are able to see the merit in what you’ve already done despite it not turning out the way you exactly wanted it to.
It seems like you have a really stoic way of looking at troubles man, i like it. You are the type of guy that doesn't get paralyzed when the shit hit the fan
I absolutely adore this, I'm really glad you still put it up even with the difficulties. All of your videos are so inspiring between the art and the worldbuilding!
I love this!!! Interviews are such cool ways to explore characters and worlds, and I haven't heard many that explore a setting like yours!! Super captivating, great stuff, I love it
Holy shit my a** was clenched the entire time waiting for a jump scare. Awesome job!
I love how depressing and disturbing this is. The witch hunters are very creepy and unnerving on the outside, but deep down, they were regular people before the trauma. Love Yakobs eerie voice.
I've really really enjoyed watching your process, the way you're very open about everything makes my own struggles feel more reasonable. Your creativity really shines through in everything you do! Also the voice acting is surprisingly good, I think the format really works :)
Totally agree, in almost every creative venture it’s fine to start again.
Awesome stuff Simon. I remember back in 2020 watching your monster design streams, those are some very fond memories. Its crazy to see how much you’ve shaped out your world, and how it’s getting seen on a larger scale. I’ve been really inspired by your creativity and dedication in your work, ever since I first saw it. Good luck!
Failure? This was quite damn good! Sound quality is absolutely fine and the dialogue felt quite natural - appropriately awkward in places, tense, overall flow of the conversation was solid. Good stuff.
I love these videos. I haven't been so riveted and immersed in a fantastic world since i was a child and read Hobbit for the first time. Thank you!
I can't stop watching it! This conversation is so atmospheric!
This is amazing dude, you had me convinced it would sound like a wind tunnel behind his voice but even while actively listening for it I couldn’t hear the fan! I hope we get more like this!
Despite the flaws of the recording, it sound really really good. Far better than most audiobooks I've heard. I feel like the world you're creating is seeping through. With each little video, with each painting it's taking shape. Please continue in a sustainable fashion. This is gold
The Witch Hunter sounds so much like some of the elderly people I know who have developed dementia that the whole thing held an unsettling familiarity
YAKOBS VOICE IS AMAZING OMG
I love you gross little bird man ❤
This turned out way better than I expected from your description alone! You really get the feeling of "oh this is NOT the place you want to be and this is NOT the company you want around"
I've always loved the concept of monster hunters who are somehow less human than the things they hunt, this just really scratches my brain so nicely, amazing work Simon!
This was great dialogue, I’d love to get more information on the inner workings of how mostly mundane humans manage to hunt and kill witches, manage their cursed forms and if those curses offer any outward advantage or are possible to be cured/ reversed.
I have never wanted to collaborate with someone so much in my life. All of your videos are like an IV drip of pure inspiration. I love your commentary on failure, too, that's something I've had to learn the hard way.
I love this soft-spoken fellow very much...possibly the most terrifying thing is that he sounds to be maybe in his mid-twenties, like this isn't 30 years of cumulative curse, just literally a couple of non-lethal dings. Witch hunting's just that hard on a body.
The voice is so disturbing, it feels like its coming from weird places, like inside of something, but not quite and I love IT. It gave the story so much more charakter
While I don't hear the fan in the background a lot myself, I do appreciate how open you're being about your process. About how it is OK to fail, move on and try again. With social media and RUclips being the way it is and people only seeing the successful end result and not the struggle or the failed attempts. Well, I can understand why that might make some creative people feel inferior about their works if it isn't "perfect" on the first try, even if such things are natural.
As for the Witch Hunter's story, I quite enjoyed it and the lore and I look forward to learning more!