Sister Wives #35 - (Jealousy & Embarrassment) - Therapist Reacts

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  • Опубликовано: 8 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 160

  • @Treecibond
    @Treecibond Месяц назад +126

    Dr Kirk I think you missed the big picture about why Christine was upset about Robyn’s dress. It wasn’t about the dress or Robynn it was that Kody was very emotionally invested in the wedding process with Robyn and Christine voices that Kody showed no interest in their wedding

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад +18

      Christine did not get an actual wedding with a reception & an unfortunate wedding dress that was not attractive. Her wedding consisted of wearing that dress & Kody showing up to formalize a spiritual marriage so he could acquire a daughter of polygamy royalty to add to his collection of women. If Christine was so royal why was there no reception for her & Kody?

    • @michellekennedy454
      @michellekennedy454 Месяц назад +7

      @@g.flesch9731because she’s not the first wife. Traditionally only the first wives get big weddings. That way, historically, they are less likely to draw attention to breaking the law. Christine knew this. I think it’s the fact she hated her wedding dress and didn’t feel beautiful that she has some wedding bitterness. Which is understandable.

    • @carolhern
      @carolhern Месяц назад +5

      I think for me, what is more upsetting to just Kody not being invested in Christine's wedding. is Robyn not wanting Kody to tell the other wives he helped pick the dress. Like lying by omission.

    • @katherineelle2503
      @katherineelle2503 Месяц назад +6

      @@carolhernI think also for Christine there’s an element of deception by Robyn. Finding out Robyn had gone secretly with Kody to pick out a dress. She believed Robyn was her friend / sister wife, and then comes to find out in that moment that Robyn is going to put herself / her relationship with Cody before anything with her sister wives (as apposed to having an equal friendship / transparent friendship)

    • @friskysmith2170
      @friskysmith2170 Месяц назад +3

      This is the answer. This would be the most upsetting to me. The girls’ shopping trip was all a sham.

  • @FrauYaU
    @FrauYaU Месяц назад +42

    Another problem I see with the way Cody says that revealing clothing is degrading is that the kids are going to see people who do wear revealing clothes as less than. I think this is especially dangerous for the boys because they may grow up thinking that it's okay to disrespect women if they aren't dressing a certain way.
    Not a parent, but I grew up with a lot of clothing double standards. I think it's just about having rules for what's appropriate for the place they're going. It's easier to be more gender neutral to say "this type of clothing isn't appropriate for this event." I remember in high school, the boys doing track could go running in only little shorts because it was really hot out. No one ever said they were showing too much skin or that it was inappropriate. On the other hand girls still had to wear t-shirts, because even showing your shoulders was inappropriate. We were taught that our bodies are inherently sexual and that we can't just exist as person wearing clothing comfortable for hot weather. I agree that you can't just let your kid wear anything, but this topic has to be addressed carefully to avoid perpetuating the harmful messages women like myself were taught.

    • @wrenn02
      @wrenn02 Месяц назад

      Thank you for sharing this! I think this is a good way of explaining it

    • @DanielleMarieW
      @DanielleMarieW Месяц назад

      As a teen, I remember going to the store to try to find comfortable shorts for hot weather. Impossible - we had tiny little micro shorts or full length pants. I’m so glad I discovered the outdoorsy trekking places that sell clothes for comfort. This helped me feel comfortable [a key value] and have it not about being sexualized.

    • @Beach_flower
      @Beach_flower Месяц назад

      I grew up the same way and you articulated this perfectly!!! It’s all very messed up

  • @goldenoreo6699
    @goldenoreo6699 Месяц назад +51

    The clothing debate always feels like a lose/lose situation for the victim of assault. Many people blame the clothing being too revealing or sending the “wrong message”. And yet, many people have been assaulted for wearing clothing that is not revealing at all. The problem has nothing to do with the clothing of the victim, and everything to do with the perpetrator. The “What Were You Wearing Exhibit” is a very powerful visualization of this.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      100% correct. Is Kody monitoring what his girls are wearing. Maybe they could wear burkas.

    • @annie_charcheologist
      @annie_charcheologist Месяц назад +6

      Maybe 20 years ago I read “does anyone get asked what they were wearing if their car gets stolen”

    • @goldenoreo6699
      @goldenoreo6699 Месяц назад +3

      @@annie_charcheologist Exactly!

    • @sharon5670
      @sharon5670 Месяц назад +8

      When the question "would you rather be alone in the woods with a man or a bear?" was working it's way around the internet, someone commented "if I get attacked by a bear, no one will ask me what I was wearing."

    • @cocomug1735
      @cocomug1735 Месяц назад +1

      I agree, and I’ve also heard the rebuttal that drawing attention for wearing provocative clothing DOES attract a certain attention… does that make any assault your fault hell no but I do think that you will get some reaction for some look

  • @tiffanyweaver8945
    @tiffanyweaver8945 Месяц назад +37

    The thought process that both men need to be " obeyed" and "lead" and also the thought that they can not control themselves also is contradictory and has to be scary for the women in these societies.

    • @dysmissme7343
      @dysmissme7343 Месяц назад

      Hence a few of them not wanting to be a first wife- they do not want to be stuck on their own with a man

  • @catherinemarie08
    @catherinemarie08 Месяц назад +41

    My mom would always ask if we were comfortable in an outfit. Not whether it was inappropriate, but would you be comfortable wearing it in what ever setting you were going into. If my sister and I were, then we could purchase the outfit or wear it that day. No argument.

    • @prchix
      @prchix Месяц назад

      That is such a positive thing to say and I love that. Wish my mom had done that, instead of telling me that at her age she looked better than me! 😂 😭I can laugh about it now

    • @Beach_flower
      @Beach_flower Месяц назад

      This is absolutely brilliant!! Thank you I’m going to use this as my kids get older ❤

    • @Beach_flower
      @Beach_flower Месяц назад +2

      @@prchixomg I’m SO sorry that is a horrible thing to say!!!

  • @helen.k
    @helen.k Месяц назад +11

    Thank you for the ending. My self-esteem has been extremely low recently and it helped a little to be acknowledged and to hear I'm not alone.

    • @vohol6158
      @vohol6158 Месяц назад +3

      You definitely are not alone, I hope you feel better soon

    • @helen.k
      @helen.k Месяц назад +2

      @@vohol6158 thank you so much for replying.

    • @Lololeelee
      @Lololeelee Месяц назад +3

      It hits home with me too.

  • @betsybabf748
    @betsybabf748 Месяц назад +10

    You're missing the reason Christine was upset about the dress. She was upset because she didn't get a wedding, just a private ceremony with no guests at all, because she just was a third wife, and Kody didn't care about it or what she wore at all. When it was Robyn he was marrying, the 4th wife, she got a huge full wedding and reception with many guests, and Kody was all excited about what Robyn wore.

    • @crb4410
      @crb4410 Месяц назад +1

      Yes. And Christine has said he didn’t care at all what she wore at their wedding.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад +1

      @@crb4410 Christine said she had a crush on Kody since she was 14. If he was so miserable on the wedding day (not legal marriage) she could have left him. If he can't be happy on the wedding day it is not a good sign for the woman.

  • @reneerevolinski4822
    @reneerevolinski4822 Месяц назад +19

    Personally, for me, this was not a difficult discussion for my daughter. My advice is to dress appropriately for the occasion. Are you going to school? Work? Job interview? Beach? Even as adults, we have dress codes to follow when we go to work. When people work in health care, there are additional requirements regarding nail polish and nail extensions. Requirements for employees who work in food service, i.e. hairnet and gloves.

  • @marikamoreau8828
    @marikamoreau8828 Месяц назад +28

    Well actually 🤓...
    Christine wasn't attached to being part of choosing the dress. Kody isn't supposed to be, in their arrangement. He had little to no interest in any other dress or wedding. But he kisses Robin before marriage, picks out her dress and so on and so forth. It's the inequality.
    The reason we are all on Christines side, is because we are now able to read between the lines through all of these seasons. It will become clearer Dr Honda. Just wait and try to spot the lies they tell themselves and the cameras. Especially Christine and Mary.

    • @bethanp3453
      @bethanp3453 Месяц назад

      I try not to take sides. I'm here for the psychology of cults not the reality TV aspect.

    • @marikamoreau8828
      @marikamoreau8828 Месяц назад +1

      @@bethanp3453 ok...? I think most of us are. That's why we're here 😅 comments like mine is made to help him understand a situation he didn't. So he can give his view on the real problem.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      @@marikamoreau8828 The problem with this site is the Dr. is looking at early episodes when season 19 has just started. We have been watching the Browns for years. He cannot see the development that we have seen over the years. This is the one reality show that I have stayed with but since season 16 watch less of the actual show because it is not entertaining to see two people behave like monsters. Kody is vicious.

    • @marikamoreau8828
      @marikamoreau8828 Месяц назад

      @@g.flesch9731 right. So I explained, hoping that he'd see it and understand what we do. Just because I'd love to hear his opinions about the dress situation/reaction, not his misunderstood version of it. 😊

  • @michajaneroy
    @michajaneroy Месяц назад +10

    I shouldn’t be sobbing at this outro, but, “I’m angry at the people who treated you that way,” WRECKED ME 😭😭😭

    • @helen.k
      @helen.k Месяц назад

      @@michajaneroy same

  • @-pinkbutterfly-6972
    @-pinkbutterfly-6972 Месяц назад +17

    Watch how Kody spends most of his time bonding with Robyn's children. Baby Solomon is always on his hip. He ignored Baby Truley. Sad

  • @mipsan
    @mipsan Месяц назад +19

    Oh what a great start of the episode, Cody judging his kids.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад +1

      Kody is a sleazy dirt bag. He is intimate with 4 women. The kids have multiple step-mothers. Why is Kody the one who is looking at & evaluating his teen daughter's clothing?

  • @laurenwasinger9436
    @laurenwasinger9436 Месяц назад +2

    I’ve always (as a parent) looked at the clothing thing from the perspective of “there are people who will make assumptions or false conclusions based on your outfit. It’s garbage, it’s messed up, it’s them who are wrong but my fear is that you may end up in uncomfortable situations because of their garbage and I just don’t want that for you. It sucks, you should be able to wear anything and be treated with respect, but it’s the world we inhabit and we have to acknowledge what it is.”

  • @rebeccalowe2223
    @rebeccalowe2223 Месяц назад +23

    I can't remember the season, but one time the boys all stripped down to their undies and went swimming. The parents were all laughing and the girls wanted to join in. Everyone freaked out and said they couldn't bc it was 2 much skin revealed. The double standard just struck me and was blindingly obvious. I can't think the browns are very stuck in archaic old fashioned ways of thinking

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад +8

      Kody stripped down to underpants (blurred out) & did his arm flexing while the boys ran into the mud & poop infested drainage ditch Kody calls a pond. Gross

  • @manumoreau444
    @manumoreau444 Месяц назад +1

    I love the off the cuff way you react, it doesn’t feel unstructured at all!

  • @HarrietteAirhart
    @HarrietteAirhart Месяц назад +11

    Dr. Honda with all due respect, the exact moment that Robyn’s child comes out of her is on camera in the episode, so I’m not sure how the edit would have left you to believe the birth wasn’t really in the edit 😂

  • @petapumpkineater7185
    @petapumpkineater7185 Месяц назад +2

    Who the heck is saying your inarticulate? That is not a fair criticism. You're very good at speaking and explaining things

  • @dalithecat
    @dalithecat Месяц назад +10

    I grew up very religious, although not like the Browns. I recall so clearly my dad yelling at me one day after church that I couldn’t wear the long -sleeved, high-necked shirt I was wearing ever again. He said it was too tight, but it wasn’t tight at all. Of course, now I realize it’s because I suddenly had breasts where they hadn’t been before.
    I remember crying in the car on the way home. I was such a people pleaser, and I was crushed. I never meant to be immodest, and my body was so dirty. It really hit me in my lizard brain.
    Fast forward to having a boy and a girl, and I just want my children to wear something appropriate to the occasion that makes them feel like their truest selves. And, preferably, no stains on your clothes (more of an issue with my son than daughter)!

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад +4

      Sorry that happened to you & you realized why he said those things about your appearance. You did not deserve those words. I wish you the best.

  • @Treecibond
    @Treecibond Месяц назад +17

    I ask my kids to think if their clothing choices are appropriate to the context of the environment they are going to.

    • @-pinkbutterfly-6972
      @-pinkbutterfly-6972 Месяц назад +2

      Exactly! Just say it's not appropriate for the occasion. I don't want to inadvertently make my daughter self-conscious.

  • @taterthot99
    @taterthot99 Месяц назад +16

    “men can’t control themselves” always coming from religious folks always makes me laugh, cause the whole idea of religion is denying your flesh and desires

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      Having teens that want to wear revealing clothes that are specifically marketed to them as being on trend may be part of the problem.

  • @ammc248
    @ammc248 Месяц назад +4

    I’m not advocating kids wandering the streets in bikinis, but god, what I wouldn’t give to have had the confidence to walk around in a bikini as a teen. I think if my teenager daughter (or son) felt that confident I’d follow them to a corner store and threaten anyone who got near them so they could just enjoy feeling comfortable in their own skin. I was more, uh, buxom than most of my classmates, and my parents were less in the line of “it’s degrading” than “it’s dangerous”, which still made me feel like my body was the problem. My mom also inherited so many self esteem issues and was pushing dieting and fat shaming on me when I was 8 years old. I don’t want to over correct in the wrong direction when I have kids, but good god I’ll be focusing on them loving themselves. The damage that dangerous men have done to me is still less than the self loathing I feel for my body. I wouldn’t wish that on my kids, ever.

  • @jazz2192
    @jazz2192 Месяц назад

    Thank you for your ending message about taking care of ourselves. We love and appreciate you Dr. Honda!

  • @AL-hi1go
    @AL-hi1go Месяц назад +1

    My day is made when I see a new Sister Wives episode on the channel lol

  • @Itsnotthatdeep88
    @Itsnotthatdeep88 Месяц назад +6

    The people who are making comments about Robyn monopolizing Kody's time is events that are in later seasons/episodes. We are still pretty early on into the series and Robyn is still very new into this situation...just keep watching the series Dr. Honda...it will all become clear in no time.

    • @Dauerglotzer123
      @Dauerglotzer123 Месяц назад

      *spoilers*
      .
      .
      .
      .
      .
      .
      And they later admitted that Robyn got Meris visits so she was even now

  • @4kassis
    @4kassis Месяц назад +2

    I’m here to see how you are slowly catching on to what is really going on here

  • @Chlovan
    @Chlovan Месяц назад +2

    My mother always insisted that outfits must match. I wore "normal" clothes t shirts jeans, dresses shorts. I'm more religious now so I dress a little differently not significantly so. I think if I ever have kids I will probably be similar. My parents never body shamed me in terms of clothing but the rule was always that I had to carry myself with respect. Not necessarily because of sexual reasons but just in general and how I dressed was a part of that.

  • @Cheesycheddar642
    @Cheesycheddar642 Месяц назад +3

    I think many of us viewers were yelling at the screen when you didn’t understand the whole Robin dress thing.

  • @madisonsscar
    @madisonsscar Месяц назад

    You’re very articulate. Thank you for posting. You rock

  • @VickyG212
    @VickyG212 Месяц назад +2

    I'm not a parent but I would say something like ...
    Every society has rules and, they're not always fair but in order to set you up for success in life I need to teach you how to navigate situations.
    There's nothing wrong with skins and bodies, but we do need to take into account other people comfort. In formal settings suck as schools and clinics, we do tend to dress more modestly. With your friends or at the beach you can be more free.

  • @KSHPittman
    @KSHPittman Месяц назад

    The dress debacle. Robin asked the ladies as a way to bond to help her with the dress. She pretended like they were helping her find the dress while all along, Kody picked the dress.

  • @SleepyLeeeee
    @SleepyLeeeee Месяц назад

    What Christine meant by "I want to cut off my arm and pour salt over it" was "This hurt me so badly (the dress thing) that I would rather hurt more in order to forget this current pain."

  • @sarahemf
    @sarahemf Месяц назад +1

    With teenagers and clothes it’s time to have the hard conversations. And the hard conversations are that sadly there are people in this world who see things very wrong. And talk about the harshness of the world. And then talk about your job as a parent being a guardian of them until they are able to make these potentially life long decisions. And ask them to have the boundaries of clothing to be a negotiation that occurs over time. And also able to meet their needs of self expression.

  • @homeschoolmom8804
    @homeschoolmom8804 Месяц назад +4

    I want my kids to be free to express themselves but in a way that they’re not sexualized.

    • @dysmissme7343
      @dysmissme7343 Месяц назад

      That’s often unavoidable, especially for girls
      Just ✨having boobs✨ is enough to be sexualized no matter what you’re wearing

  • @supercoke11197
    @supercoke11197 Месяц назад

    As a teacher, I tell my female students “time and place, you don’t wear a ski suit to the beach.” This of course is in the context of girls rolling their skirts super short (i work at a private school) and I only address it with girl when the shorts underneath their skirts are showing or something like that. I try to explain it in a way that doesnt shame them but also relays that the length of their skirts is not appropriate for the environment

  • @FishareFriendsNotFood972
    @FishareFriendsNotFood972 Месяц назад +4

    The best I've seen about 'dress code' rules taught to children is truly being pretty gender neutral and a bit silly, like a clip I saw on youtube of a Dad trying to show his teenage daughter that a pair of jean shorts were too short for school; he just bought a pair for himself and strutted around in them, and then every objection the daughter had, the father just brushed off and said 'I think they look nice!'. Everyone was giggling and the father was not so much shaming the daughter as embarrassing her, I think she got the message, it wasn't about HER body not being appropriate, and more about all bodies can and should have boundaries on how much to expose and when. As far as teaching 'appropriate clothing choices' goes, I think a silly rule of 'every time you wear booty shorts, your Dad does too!' is as cute a way to do it as possible

    • @cuddlebug1957
      @cuddlebug1957 Месяц назад +2

      Sure, but the larger problem is the availability of girls clothing is limited to short, tight, extra holes, etc. little girls shorts are either tight biker shorts or short shorts, little boy shorts are longer and baggier. I have 2 girls and I have never seen loose, long shorts available in the girls sections of a target, kohls, or department store. So then they have to be hot and wear pants? Retailers need to offer more options for girls or be truly gender neutral.

    • @FishareFriendsNotFood972
      @FishareFriendsNotFood972 Месяц назад +1

      @@cuddlebug1957 If your girls are ok with it, I think it's completely great for girls to shop for clothes in the boys section, I agree the shorts are better over there. And the clothes are cheaper in the boys section! Plenty of girls enjoy a baggier fit. I also buy all male razors, shaving cream, deodorant, soap, etc for the family, because we all think they are same quality products for cheaper. Gendering almost everything I find silly and I encourage kids to push back on that as early as possible 🙂

  • @user-lt5cg5wz8m
    @user-lt5cg5wz8m Месяц назад +1

    The clothing issue I would say not everyone out and about DESERVES to see all your skin. I’m mom to a baby girl now so I am thinking of these things a lot lately and I’d love to hear others thoughts!

  • @msdaphne
    @msdaphne Месяц назад +1

    The dress thing is so obvious why it would be a problem for Christine/the wives. Robyn sold them on "dress shopping" being a bonding thing they were doing together. Great. If she had gone and made the final decision alone, or with a best girlfriend/sister/mom/cousin, that would have been fine and not offensive. But instead, Robyn took THEIR husband wedding dress shopping, and then insisted on him keeping it a secret because she knew it was would hurt them.
    She showed that she was willing to be deceptive and cause the women pain if it would make Kody a little happy. And it happens repeatedly.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      Kody could have kept the wedding dress selection a secret from his 3 wives but he was busting with pride when he told them. The guy has zero empathy for any woman. Clearly he does not like women only what he can get from them. Money or sex a bunch of kids for his planet heaven.

  • @GrannyDi276
    @GrannyDi276 17 дней назад

    I think dressing modestly is good for men, women & society as a whole....you expressed that well....

  • @Dahlily
    @Dahlily Месяц назад +1

    Hey I have another idea of a show you could react to that I think would be interesting: the secret lives of Mormon wives! It only has 10 episodes as far as I'm aware and I think Whitney is so interesting (and I kind of feel bad for her, would be interested in your analysis, although your list is probably endless already!)

  • @hollid90
    @hollid90 Месяц назад

    To those saying and thinking they dont deserve to take care of themselves, just know everytime you say and think that, you're calling Dr. Honda a liar. And thats not very nice, so just take care! ❤

  • @divamomj9187
    @divamomj9187 Месяц назад +2

    I’m thinking you should watch seasons 15 - 18, then watch the series from the beginning. You have to have the proper context to understand what is actually at play. Most of the truth about the show is revealed starting in the later seasons. That’s why people are doing these look backs. Otherwise, you’ll get to the end and you’re going to have to start over.

  • @eralonuva
    @eralonuva Месяц назад +2

    I ask both the kids to dress nicely for school as a way to show respect to the teachers and to show that they take school seriously, the same way people are expected to dress in different appropriate ways for their jobs, depending on what their jobs are. It's not about amount of skin because bikinis are appropriate at the beach.

  • @Alayhoo
    @Alayhoo Месяц назад

    Book recommendations related to this videos topics:
    _The Purity Myth: How America’s Obsession with Virginity is Hurting Young Women_
    _Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power & A World Without Rape_

  • @girl123interrupted
    @girl123interrupted 16 дней назад

    It’s not even jealousy like the OG three have basically been single parents for YEARS Robby came along and all of a sudden it was “oh Ari can’t be away from kody for more than 6 hours she panics” it’s the reason Robyn’s kids are so soft 😢not fit for the real world you can’t just cry and collapse (literally) everytime you don’t get your way

  • @Whiskeyriver714
    @Whiskeyriver714 Месяц назад +2

    Robin filmed herself in the ER when she tested positive for covid. ( they sent her home…mild case) that girl wants all the attention.

  • @habeashumor9814
    @habeashumor9814 Месяц назад

    Degrading= Your coveredness IS your dignity and respectability. It can literally be ripped away from you by force by any man who is so inclined, and if that happens, you will permanently become ruined goods.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      Please do not say a female can be permanently ruined goods. That is backwards thinking. Women do not deserve that kind of mentality.

  • @bizzarreprincess8854
    @bizzarreprincess8854 Месяц назад +14

    Men should be leaders but can’t control the most basic human urges. You can’t have these two at the same time😅 This idea is so funny to me

  • @tmtb80
    @tmtb80 Месяц назад

    If someone or something rubs salt into the wound, they make the unpleasant situation that you are in even worse, often by reminding you of your failures or faults.
    - Collins Dictionary

  • @Tcon1969
    @Tcon1969 Месяц назад +2

    You are misremembering the dress situation. Robyn invited the other wives to be part of the process, but then shopped with Kody. They felt betrayed by Robyn asking them to be part of the experience but then felt like it really didn't matter and wasn't sincere. It also showed how much more engaged he was with this wedding than he was with the others, especially Janelle and Christine's. It was the first sign of his favoritism.

    • @msdaphne
      @msdaphne Месяц назад +2

      And also that Robyn and Kody had every intention of being a "couple" rather Robyn being blended into the family.

  • @IWantToRideMyBike
    @IWantToRideMyBike Месяц назад

    We have different rules for inside and outside of the house. Inside the house is their safe space and they can wear literally whatever they want.
    Outside of the house, we don’t know everyone. And while most people they encounter will be nice people, there are some who might have bad intentions.
    While it is frustrating and sad that we have to think about that, it is still the reality.
    But this also comes with a conversation about how you are never to blame for someone harming you are treating you badly.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      Most people are nice means you are giving your trust to strangers. Girls are too often told to be nice girls good girls well lots of people are not to be trusted.

  • @misterhenchmen
    @misterhenchmen Месяц назад

    If my child wanted to go out in the world dressed in a way that I was uncomfortable with I would say to my son or daughter, "I am worried that look may attract unhealthy attention from people. I want you to feel like you can express yourself with the way you dress, but I really want you to feel safe because I care about you a lot."

  • @MarieBSleepin
    @MarieBSleepin Месяц назад +1

    The clothes thing all boils down. To sex. If you want your kid to cover up - maybe you need to have more conversations about sex. Not the act itself, but the way that sex is woven into the fabric of society and you want them to make informed decisions, but also you may need to hear why those clothes make them feel more comfortable and just have an open dialogue.

  • @heidinuttall3307
    @heidinuttall3307 Месяц назад

    Christine's maiden name is Allred, As is mine. We come from the same grandfather and are genetically tall. Christine's father was probably 6'2" or 6'3"

  • @MegaGreencarebear
    @MegaGreencarebear Месяц назад

    Take care of yourself DH. You must be tired after that live stream. Otsukaresama! 👏

  • @critiquerwhittaker
    @critiquerwhittaker Месяц назад

    You know, it’s interesting, I grew up in the modesty culture and I never once thought it was because women’s bodies were disgusting or that men can’t help themselves if you show skin. It’s interesting how the same message can be interpreted so differently by different people.
    However, that line by Kody, yikes!

  • @lizrozon6308
    @lizrozon6308 Месяц назад

    Once they move to Vegas there was a shift and then flagstaff/covid created some real divisions. I don’t want to spoil anything for Dr. Kirk but it’ll be clear who his favorite is.

  • @Jellybeanjeans
    @Jellybeanjeans Месяц назад +1

    Grew up LDS got a mixed bag on modesty depending on who was teacher of the week. Sometimes, it was positive that modesty was between you and god to dress well and not to be for the gratification of others(could be actually inpowering). Other times, it was men really struggle and you (women) dont understand how hard it is so cover up more (boo hoo). And other times it was really damaging about body image and we were responsible for mens sins and problems. (Sorry, I have some issues. I had some bad experiences) but this bag of mixed experiences added to the official church statements about beliefs. Is why sometimes you will get a mixed bag of reports from members.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      Kids attend schools & schools have dress codes for what is appropriate for wearing to school & what is not appropriate. So kids do have some guidelines to clothing. It seems most teens wear jeans & tee-shirts.

  • @dash-x
    @dash-x Месяц назад

    I don’t mind families who have modesty standard, however I feel Kody wouldn’t say it’s degrading if his sons of similar age were maybe doing yard word for instance, on a hot day and took their top off . I could be wrong, but 🤷🏻‍♀️

  • @shanaweissman1359
    @shanaweissman1359 Месяц назад +3

    I think it is a gendered issue, there's different clothes in stores for men and women, unfortunately its a different conversation for boys than it is girls. Hopefully I can teach her not to base her value on men's attention/validation and make sure a low self esteem doesn't impact her decisions in life.

  • @kathyl2620
    @kathyl2620 Месяц назад

    This kinda triggers me because my girlfriend's daughter wore a tank top to the flea market. She was maybe 12 or 13, and someone (a male) made a comment towards her. My friend's husband (step dad) made the comment that the comment was provoked by the child. When the mom told me that I was wooooow. 😮 Stop

  • @AliciaMcIntire
    @AliciaMcIntire Месяц назад

    So, this is LDS specific, but I think that the most helpful view of modesty has centered on the promises we make with God. For us, adult men and women make the same promises of modesty in our temples. So, having the kids keep similar standards is a way to help them prepare to make those promises. I'm not sure about whether AUB follows temple doctrine, but that could be a non-gendered framing of modesty that also follows their beliefs.

    • @NM-ub6ml
      @NM-ub6ml Месяц назад

      What is modesty though? I watched a fairly religious aunt praise her 3 year old child for holding his hand crossed infront of his little boy pants (not usapants) As she was helping him change and put his tshirt on. Good modest boy she said. At twenty I thought.. ick he is a kid.. why are you teaching him to sexualise body parts?!you are his mum...
      We project so much i think attitudes like that show the modesty approach as being really sexual about body parts/shape and frankly weird in thoughts.
      Much less self consciousness and focus on the body and just letting the body be seen as normal would be far healthier imo.
      It is very strange
      Frankly as long as a reasonable amount of bits are covered the rest doesn't matter imo
      Oh and girls have boob's and hips and we aren't wearing sacks to hide them.

  • @downtowntrash
    @downtowntrash Месяц назад +1

    😊good morning

  • @Dayofmourning
    @Dayofmourning Месяц назад

    “What you are wearing is not appropriate for the situation” a bikini is appropriate for the beach, not the classroom as an example.

  • @samanthaconnelly4046
    @samanthaconnelly4046 Месяц назад

    I’d probably focus on functionality of the clothes if you go on a bikini you’re probably gonna be a comfortable point during the day physically or not you’re cold. You gotta sit on a school seat. It’s not super functional for what you’re there to do.

  • @moogie01956
    @moogie01956 Месяц назад

    People (male/female) should dress for the environment and norms that match your company and belief system. I think Kody is expressing discomfort of shorts even at home.

  • @lynnvon8758
    @lynnvon8758 15 дней назад

    Give it time dr honda. You will hear about robyn talking kodys time.

  • @heidinuttall3307
    @heidinuttall3307 Месяц назад

    The awareness jewelry is for Suicide awareness. It makes me kind of caring that they decided that was their role. Making money off of a life lost to suicide?

    • @vjones4769
      @vjones4769 Месяц назад

      Maybe they are donating proceeds?

  • @prchix
    @prchix Месяц назад

    I know there's a lot to get to in this series but come on Dr. H. Call out the jerk faces,, trainer Bill was such an A - HOLE to Janelle!

  • @jenhalpin
    @jenhalpin Месяц назад +2

    In this entire show, you should be watching the first two seasons, then the last two seasons and then work your way through the entire series.

  • @emilydriedger4840
    @emilydriedger4840 Месяц назад +1

    As a Christian mom, the way I plan on teaching modesty as my kids grow up is that we are called to have a humble spirit. So if the clothing you’re asking to buy/wear appeals to you because it shows off your body or it shows off a particular brand that would give you status or whatever-if it’s a pride thing and/or a matter of making other people think more highly of you then that’s a red flag. We want to wear clothes we feel comfortable and happy in. Clothes that allow us to express ourselves and that we feel good in. We don’t want to use clothing as a way to show off our bodies or our money or our status.

    • @NM-ub6ml
      @NM-ub6ml Месяц назад +2

      What is wrong with having pride in your body.. its health its vitality...? What is the opposite of pride in that context?

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад

      Well you should contact the kids/teen clothing industry. They are marketing clothes for girls to show their belly. 8 year old girls. Also advertisement on clothing: Champion, Nike, etc. Clothing for kids that advertise. I don't see belly revealing tees for boys.
      These are clothes available at Kohls & Target.

  • @faLLingFASterfeARing
    @faLLingFASterfeARing Месяц назад +2

    My mom never had to tell me anything….by 11 I was already getting way too much attention from grown men and boys. Very quickly started dressing like a tomboy/borrowing my dad’s clothes.

  • @kellybrusky8765
    @kellybrusky8765 Месяц назад

    Sorry sure why anyone would say you’re inarticulate. I wholly disagree!

  • @jenhalpin
    @jenhalpin Месяц назад +1

    Then watch “without a crystal ball” because she does a lot of research on polygamy as a whole

  • @gwendolynnorton6329
    @gwendolynnorton6329 Месяц назад

    Boys and girls have completely different reactions to seeing skin on the opposite gender Girls do not inherently understand this Somehow you have to help girls understand this; for their own good You have to figure out a way to help them with this without shaming them

    • @NM-ub6ml
      @NM-ub6ml Месяц назад

      This isn't true... genuinely it disturbs me you think boys are unable to be thoughtful and in control of them self. It shows no respect for boys

  • @theredrover3217
    @theredrover3217 Месяц назад

    I have no idea what the level of reveal the clothing they speak of is. However, I am frankly shocked by how prevalent it has become for females to "show skin" in my opinion in inappropriate circumstances.
    Private situations, in public places such as night clubs and at the beach or some version of a water sport activity are not the same thing or places as shopping at Walmart or getting groceries. I will mention I live where it is common, in fact expect a female to pop into a convenience or grocery store to pick up supplies along the way to or from the numerous beaches here. Still I expect children to adults to have the DECENCY and, self-respect, to cover their private parts.
    And, it is NOT a matter of males (OR females) be exposed to urges beyond their capacity to control.
    I am a female and I don't want to see 'it' or at the level of 'revealing' that is so common now.
    I have not watched the Sister Wives series (although would if it was available without having to pay for it) so have not had the opportunity to see what Cody is referring to. I do think I can safely assume given they are a practicing religious family none of the females in it reveal themselves to the degree I am actually disgusted.
    I do support the female cause of promoting self-image and children allowed to make fashion choices.
    I would however feel it a parental/guardian responsibility to not allow young boys be exposed to ANY females naked in the home sufficiently to become used to it. And would in particular be very mindful of teenage boys have raging hormones with yet undeveloped brains needing to learn self-control.
    Prevent young girls from being in a position they have difficulty standing up for themselves. No matter what the cause or reason incest is wrong both socially and biologically (as well as any type of abuse to children.) This needs to be taught and enforced while still young when children have undeveloped brains TO have any hope they have self-control as adults.
    I cannot resist mentioning I have a problem in regard to body self image. Struggling constantly with the aging issues of losing skin elasticity and gravity will eventually win lol. When have the opportunity encourage young women to flaunt what they got while they can.
    On the other hand am continually surprised by the willingness of some women to display the physical effects of obesity via tight clothing public. The amount may be a local issue, I have not traveled to the USA mainland for a good while now. It is a matter of taste lol and where I live does have a much more relaxed dress overall as well as year-round climate more skimpy clothing IS appropriate. 😊
    However, I watch a lot of RUclips and stream to watch shows and movies on TV so do see a lot at what the Mainland public is also willing to do.
    As I said surprised the extent so many women are comfortable leaving nothing to imagine. It is easy to simply NOT imagine and really dislike flat out being FORCED to be aware of.

    • @NM-ub6ml
      @NM-ub6ml Месяц назад +1

      Are you really that uncomfortable with the human body? Oh and a side of fat shaming as well?

    • @theredrover3217
      @theredrover3217 Месяц назад

      @@NM-ub6ml Yes to the first, it has helped me greatly to maintain a weight I AM comfortable with for both self-image and recognition how much easier physically it is. For example not have to unnecessarily stress my knees with every step. And this has become more important as I deal with injuries suffered in youth I COULD have avoided by not engaging in sports and not do stupid things known are prone to such injury.
      Unlike physical defects people are born with obesity is a choice every female and male, fully have the right to choose.
      As I said, I would prefer to not HAVE to clearly 'see' details of what obesity looks like AND, have NO problem with them left to imagination. The choice of attire IS a choice.
      Having extensive experience in trauma and Medical Care it was by CHOICE, to be exposed to smells and situations so 'unpleasant' the mere proximity would cause many people to vomit and literally, examine a person's anatomy. While I did not seek opportunities to, I never once shirked my responsibilities as as family, a professional or volunteer and it was not hard to take care to not engage in any sort of 'body shaming'.
      Nor am I overly uncomfortable displaying my anatomy to include that of a sexual nature, in situations it is appropriate - like in intimacy and medical situations.

  • @kat1823
    @kat1823 Месяц назад +4

    I think it's okay to tell your kids if you dress inappropriately. It attracts the wrong kind of attention and people.Nothing wrong with that stand firm, dad's

    • @JJ-ry8mn
      @JJ-ry8mn Месяц назад +2

      There’s a lot wrong with it since it A) perpetuates the idea of women as temptresses that invite crime by displaying their bodies and B) doesn’t do anything to educate people against sexual violence by teaching about consent or boundaries. It’s just pointless fear mongering.

    • @mipsan
      @mipsan Месяц назад +15

      @kat1823 I agree it's ok to guide your kids, but the way you say it is very important. I will never forget the way my mother talked about my appearance, it taught me to hate my body.

    • @I_am_not_your_sister
      @I_am_not_your_sister Месяц назад +8

      define innapropriate.... you should google the exhibit what I was wearing when was assaulted- the wrong attention, comes from men and boys not being taught correctly, and no matter what you wear you can't avoid being harmed by a man or boy who has been socialized in the patriarchy. I can tell you from my own personal experience I was literally covered from head to toe, hair included, it did not save me.

    • @g.flesch9731
      @g.flesch9731 Месяц назад +5

      ​@@I_am_not_your_sisterMeanwhile Kody lectures his daughter while he sleeps with 4 women.

    • @bombadillo
      @bombadillo Месяц назад +1

      ​@@I_am_not_your_sister I totally get what you are saying here but there is a whole spectrum of "wrong kind of attention". I don't think OP meant a physical assault but more social consequences or people who don't care about anything but your looks.

  • @tmtb80
    @tmtb80 Месяц назад

    Here is what I've said to young women/teens: You are going to get the wrong type of attention. Guys are already going to notice you and possibly want to 'BE' with you. If you dress that way, you will be getting attention from the wrong guys (opportunists) and possibly turning off the guys who might be keepers (who are interested in knowing you).
    [And, depending on the girl: Don't be surprised if guys/people objectify you if you dress like an object! Try it out for a bit, but do what you gotta do to find your own style.]

    • @babymac1379
      @babymac1379 Месяц назад +1

      Pretty sure these people are not wearing costumes to make themselves look like inanimate objects. They're not dressing "like an object" - they're still dressing like humans.

  • @dash-x
    @dash-x Месяц назад

    Put a pin in a lot of your questions. They will become clearer as you get caught up. I’ve been trying to be good and not spoil for ya 😹🫶🏼