Why You Should Date A Singaporean | TDK Podcast #95
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- What's dating in Singapore like? Dating in your 20s VS 30s. Attractive traits in women vs men. How we talk about seggs with our friends, men vs women.
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Cast:
• Johnathan Chua / johnathanchua
• Daniel Lim / danlim11
• Jonathan Paul / jonathanpaul.sxw
• Denise Oh / ohthedenise
Behind the Cam:
• Nashrul Merza
• Julian Chin
• Keith Kok
• Daren Khek
• Charlene Goh
Edited by:
Daniel See
shoutout to editor for giving double (even triple) subtitles when conversations are overlapped!
yeah, A+ for sure. I commented before but I guess it must have been quite a common issue.
I don't see the subtitles?
@@kk-gb7fq only when the conversations overlap
totally! thanks for the hardwork and keep it up
About the unconditional love, i saved this tweet whereby the 2nd part of it explains why true love towards men is rare.
The closest thing you can get as a man to being cared about, is being cared about because you're useful.
Implicit to the role of provider is not being loved for who you are, but what you can do.
Men have no inherent value, while women and children are valued simply for exisitng.
This is why boyhood to manhood is an especailly rough transition for males, because they're no longer loved simply for existing.
Their worthiness must be proven or they're nothing, and no one cares.
Women preserve their value, men have to create it.
This is why the average woman is more valuable than the average man.
Especially in a society which favours women over men.
Example: if there were a fire or hostage situation, the women and children are rescued or negotiated for first.
There is a 3rd part to this tweet as well about linking success with gender (but it is quite morbid).
If this podcast would like me to share, i can share it as a reply
I want to know!
Pls share thanks!
Sorry, didn't see my notifications until now.
The 3rd part follows:
Success isn't a lifestyle choice for men.
It's a matter of life and death.
It's a lifestyle choice for women.
A women who fails in academia or business can just give up and become a mother.
She will still be wanted for who she is
No one is interested in a loser man.
So, of course men will always have to outdo women at the high end of society because.....they have to.
The men that don't make it aren't even assigned a base level of compassion or human decency. They become an invisible underclass...
@@B4LLI5LIFE see below
@@amostan356 see below
Actually when Shermane say the good thing about dating a certain person may be the different positions one gets to try... that sentiment maybbe shared by many people.
Maybe not about positions.
But about sexual acceptance.
Especially in the area of sexual fantasies.
Imagine there are 3 potential dating candidates.
First one outright finds your sexual fantasies distasteful, disgusting and dumb.
Second one accepts and is willing to tolerate it once in a while.
Third one is just as enthusiastic about playing out the fantasy as you are.
Who would you choose?
Also considering the fact that a lot of things in a relationship can be substituted.
Domestic support can be outsourced.
Companionship can be outsourced to your bros.
But sex cannot be outsourced.
So if you really think about it, sexual preferences is quite a legit point. Especially if you are dating in your 20s and 30s.
If you are dating in your 60s then it may be a different story.
Welcome back JP! love how Denise smack his "face" and also how he defended men!
my best trait is that i'm a very understanding partner and will always think in their shoes to rationalise things even when im angry. But the drawback is that this makes me a doormat and taken for granted ugh rs are so tough
I hope you can find someone that can understand you in return. My bro is kinda the same and I’m sad to see guy taken for granted like it the norm.
I like the part like Denise and JP "attacking" each other in the friendly way. Attractive traits: like cleanliness and work out often. :)
this is interesting because i've never thought of what i offer in a relationship (maybe this is why i stay single wow I've always only thought of what I want in a partner, this question just never really got proper thought and as a INTP I am very humbled to realize this)
1. Definitely can offer (too much) opinion on any random topic, so toss something at me and you can get hour long discussions to boggle your mind. Why are we still doing 5-day-9to5-workweeks? Why don't people question if they truly desire children? Will China invade Taiwan, if yes when and how? How did Switzerland's economy develop? How powerful can soft culture influence be? The history and trends of evolution in kpop? What music instrument is relatively easy to learn? Why do people have so much concern of what happens to them after they die? What's the role of religion then vs now and is it still relevant? Are we born good (learn to be bad) or bad (taught to be good)? How valid is the horoscope stuff and MBTI? Is the economic system fucked and why is there no out for capitalism? ... etc.
2. Relatively easy going on small things but still can make a decision if I must (I have a clear list of do-not-wants/cannot-haves and some factors to consider eg distance and genre) while holding firm opinion on bigger things
3. A healthy dose of spontaneity - I generally prefer making plans but there will always be impromptu ones. If my impromptu decision/thought has greater implication though I will make sure to follow up with a proper plan. I dance within bounds of rational considerations.
4. Not expensive to date because a) I don't expect you to foot the bill b) I don't drink c) I don't take seafood and d) not obsessed with luxury
5. You will have plenty of me-time because I will definitely need plenty of me time, but honestly we can be side by side and do our own things too idm.
6. Socially, you don't have much competition if I decide to give you my emotions and attention, so little reason to be insecure. But anyway, I don't think I want to be with someone who is insecure so I doubt this point will be relevant to you. You might need more patience before we get there though, but in exchange I can guarantee loyalty.
thanks to the team for the consistent and frequent upload!!! literally what i look forward to every few days/week 🤟🏻
A good amount of positivity; living in the moment & being appreciative. -- I actually do think that these are what I hope my partner has! interesting observation from you guys
let me complete that sentence. "it's not that we expect the women to do it, we'll either pay to outsource it..." or allow the women to do it, either way I dont expect to be the one doing it
I have a simple question and see if equality is true. Is his money, her money and vice versa?
this channels uploads is the highlight of my day at this point
Appreciate the sub during mix chatting. Thumbs up👍
Why would guy share to another friend abt his girl in details? I dont quite understand.. guys are supposed to protect the girl and by sharing these information. That is not protecting.
I asked my partner what is my best trait (I do have my own answer for myself but I just want to know if what he thinks and what I think is the same)
His answer is "My favourite part about you is how our mindset are similar and our chemistry match"
It hit me, that is so right!
All others traits or "reason" is not that great as compared to this particular "trait"
As always, I love your podcast! Would you mind talking about toxic relationships? More about the verbal abuse as there is a lot of gray zone in a relationship, but what constitutes a toxic relationship and when is it time to end the relationship?
What will you do if you notice your friend in a toxic relationship? Should I step in, or should I "mind my own business" as someone might suggest?
jp really changed personality as he changed seats
Early squad! Really like the subtitle additions as well
when the subscribe reminder came up, i got so sad because the video was so short... thankfully its just a reminder
I have been very curious all these while.. what does the ‘’m meant at the corner of the screen on most of the videos??
Unconditional support in your dreams and goals, and helping you navigate it to make it successful or at least being alongside along the whole way..
While I totally agree with doing away with gender norms such as women being the child rearer and housewife, I wonder why the same gender norm isn’t as explicitly advocated for men who do not any career goals/ achievements. It could very well be my social circle where as women are being more career focused, men who are content and without any career-related goals are being chastised and rejected. Is this an issue with being contented and largely due to the environment that we are brought up in?
Best thing about dating me is 1. I'm both single and available and 2. I'm really single
@6:02 Denise, you just agreed that man cannot be 100% loved unconditionally. In 1 big circle, you came back to the focus point that a man can be loved if he has nothing but money, giving point to the perspective, a man has to provide and hence, no man can be loved 100% unconditonally.
Both men and women CAN be loved 💯 unconditionally, but the reality is modern relationships will not allow unconditional love to happen.
@@alanho8977 and ppl get unhappier until resets such as pandemics and wars take the choice out of their hands
female solo backpacker
Notification Gang!!
Awesome episode TDK team! The best thing about dating me is that I can make you laugh in the most awkward situations. For example, hanging next to me, will make you drop dead gorgeous.....literally :D lol
I'm thrifty AF, low maintenance AF, but that also makes me unambitious AF. I can take care of myself just fine, likes to talk about things at length, at home with nature and quiet, but there won't be anything adventurous. Not a party person nor a joiner.
Asexual AF though.
jon paul whoooooooo
30:57 growth mindset
kneecaps 🦵
Hello there
Guys have it harder when it comes to dating and its only getting harder now. They don't experience unconditional love.
Guys just be the best version of yourself.we should love ourselves
i want ben wong to be my partner
Sex is a really intimate thing and all this kiss and tell can be either good or bad.
from a pov. or point of ref.
Sex is definately not about the big O thats just the icing on the cake.
so make the cake and eat it too... not just the icing.
I used to date a controlling and toxic girl as I was mentally and physically abused
i’ll make you realize what kind of partner you will want in the future. HAHAHA!
Guy version is looks or money haha
first
1st
For those of u that dont know about barney stinson's hot-crazy scale (from himym) which daniel mentioned at 12:15 where a girl is allowed to be a certain level of crazy if she is a certain level of hotness. This link is a scene from the show to help illustrate it ruclips.net/video/5zADosF3XoQ/видео.html
hope that helps.
P.s how i met your mother is one of my favourite shows
Nooo eeeeewwww men shouldn't have anything like that
Algoooooo
I will never be with a poor broke stingy dude and never no damn prenup
The new girl is a great addition and female perspective that Denise wasn’t able to offer. Don’t think Denise provides very good insights at all prob due to experience and age #cannotrelate
I disagree. I love Denise’s outlook, the way she breaks things down, how she asks questions to dig deeper, and she’s super super matured for her age.
I get what you mean.
Indeed Shermane is invaluable to this conversation because she provides the honest perspective from a girl that likes guys.
The one about liking firm chest in guys also came from Shermane. Pretty much none of the other cast members could really understand that.
There are other masculine traits also that the other cast members may not fully comprehend just how attractive it can be.
Hair, forearms, well defined sharp facial features, deep voice, veins in hands and arms etc.
It may seem superficial but hey if this is a person you are going to look at, cuddle with and fondle a lot then seemingly superficial stuff becomes very important.
The disconnect in tastes is a similar situation if you love art and try explaining to a science person why you love art.
On some level the science person is not going to get you.
But i do also agree that Denise has very good ways of dissecting a big topic and breaking it down into smaller parts by asking good questions.
I disagree, I think Denise provides valueble insight. And prompts and ask good questions
Love Denise, her blunt curiosity makes for good conversation starters!
Also love Shermane's inputs, i relate to alot of the things she says like phrasing her assertiveness in a productive way!
Date a singaporen with the same belief in the Catholic faith you will never go wrong cause he will keep u grounded in your own pray life