Leaving The Dating Apps Again...
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- Опубликовано: 19 окт 2024
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Oh Kevin come on! Look, you're simply to gorgeous to leave those apps and by you doing so, you're doing a disservice to your community.😩
LOL what am I - a concubine?
You’ll be back on the hookup apps 😂
Thanks for the support 🥴
Wow you're really handsome. Greetings from Greece!
Thank you 😘
BTW, you have very good skin … whatever your skincare is, it’s working. To top it off, yours also very handsome with smarts. ❤
Thank you! I've been using these new face masks during my post-run baths 😂
Kevin, come up to Wilton manors for a weekend. You’ll meet lots of locals here in Fort Lauderdale and in Miami too! Sometimes I drive down to Miami to take a break from Fort Lauderdale weekends lol. Shared this video on my FB. I love and support your journey, friend!
Thank you for sharing on your FB, Pete!
Yes, I need to return to Wilton Manors at some point...only been once. Maybe this winter? 😘
Good Topic - Gave up using app's for the most part 10+ years ago. Yes, there's the occasion when I think: oh, I'll just try it and see - and then I delete the app again. Sadly, the same serial shaggers from all those years ago are still trolling. Bye-Bye.
Yikes, still 10 years later, you see the same people on there?
What do you do to meet guys now?
@@KevenTalks Stay home now, hope to meet others organically not using electronics - it’s rare, but on the upside happy with my choices.
@@StevieinSF I understand that.
I paid for a Grindr Subscription for one month. Deleted the app four times, along with my pictures and profile. NEVER EVER AGAIN❗️😳 in my surrounding area, half of the men were pretty sleazy, half looking for guys with $$, half on DL, the others either looked/seemed bored or jaded.
I got depressed twice. I was just looking for a buddy to do things with along with sex and maybe see where it goes. I WAS in a 20 year relationship and ready to get my feet wet again. Was I ever wrong. What a horrible experience that was. I’m from the old school where guys met on the streets, in the bars, clubs, subway, dinner parties. I feel sad for this generation of gays. No one court anymore. SAD❗️
Yes, courtship (especially in the US) seems non-existent among gay guys. But, that's another reason I left that app. I can't be shocked if I'm on such a "surface" app. Your description of guys on there is spot on lol
App profiles, like most all social media, are curated. Growing up (and I'm not of your generation) no one spoke of branding, and yet that seems the focus of contemporary life. We are commodifying our selves, marketing ourselves, trying to present ourselves as we want to be perceived; not always as we are. It all became too artificial for me.
Once I met someone in a natural circumstance that demonstrated a basic commonality. We arranged to meet for lunch. That led to an hours-long date that included a visit to an arts festival and dinner. There were a handful of other dates before it was ended, which was disappointing. The point was that it was organic. It was authentic. We weren't posturing. We tried and it didn't work out. Still, it was far and away a better experience than any found on apps.
It happened once. I just have to trust it will again. In the meanwhile, and here I repeat myself, I've learned to enjoy my own company.
I hear you. I've had organic connections from apps (rare, but it's happened), so I guess I always hope for lightning to strike twice.
Exactly. It's called capitalism and no matter what, you will always end up selling yourself to it
Well I've never been on a dating app, I'm too paranoid lol! And you look like a zaddy, hairy or not sooo.... A young zaddy lol
Not a zaddy! I'm too young! 🥴😅
@@KevenTalks 😩😅😂😘🥰
You might have exlended bit of effort toward The Cowboy. He is The Antithesis of all the Ridiculousness you have consistently encountered.
Why do you think you don't find more people on your wavelength on the apps? Do you think it is because a lot of people on the apps are DL or just not ready to date?
One of the other factors that recently happened that I didn't mention in the video, is that one of my close female friends is also on apps right now, and she's been sending me profiles of guys "for approval." It was shocking to me what kind of guys she's exposed to vs what I'm (or we're) exposed to as gay people. She actually has solid, polished guys come up constantly on her apps in Miami who seem ready & eager for partnership. I find that at least in Miami, that's rare for me on these apps. So I think it's a matter of numbers (we're what, like 10% of the population?), but also frankly, I am selective, and we're in this community that's is pretty fragmented - as you mentioned: DL culture, drug/party culture, toxic masculinity culture, etc. So I think it's a combination of things. But I will say that when I lived in NYC, I did find more refined guys on apps there.
Personally, I like the apps. I think it does require that you approach them with certain expectations and intentions (I use Grindr and Scruff, for context). I like to use them to find people in the area that may be looking for what I'm looking for, around the time I'm looking for it. Sometimes that means a hookup, and sometimes that means something social like finding another gay at the amusement park, or someone who wants to meet up and go out dancing. I've definitely improved my experience with the apps by approaching them with a "if nobody is online for what I am looking for right now, just close the app and move on". Refreshing, trying to find someone usually seems like a waste of time.
I like them too, sometimes - lol. I don't believe that these apps are inherently "bad" - but as you mentioned, it gets draining when your intentions don't line up with others' intentions. So when that happens too often, it's best to hop off for a while.
Are you serious? Of course you’ll be back 😂
I'll be back when I travel but I don't want to use an app like Grindr where I live (Miami). It's too much of a party scene & I don't like what I'm exposed to here
Hey Kevin, I tweeted a link to this video. I have 570 followers on my twitter. Hopefully that will get you some more subscribers.
Omg you have way more Twitter followers than me, LOL - thank you so much for doing that! I really appreciate it 😘
gay dating apps were so limited and inauthentic so i stopped using them in october now i rely on in person interactions as a confident person by organic conversations no ghosting, headless profile, masc4masc profiles, hookups. i felt better after leaving those apps and now i asked a guy out on my own by relying on my social skills and emotional intelligence plus taking risk + the rejection and i didnt get rejected and got a yes from him to go out for drinks. no gay dating apps required.
Love it! 😘
Schick Quattro women great!
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Idk I’m back in dating apps it’s hard dating as a trans woman… I get allot of likes and guys ask me out because I guess I would say I’m pretty attractive especially for a trans woman.. lol 😅not to sound vain but I will get a date and then sometimes it won’t go past that, sometimes I do find a good guy for awhile then it goes south later on. But I’m frustrated because most people want sex and my time is wasted and same with my energy. 😢 it’s sad I just want a cute nice guy to chill with. Hell I’ll even take a few friends. People are just fake these days…. Oh well atleast I can get free food or a movie out of it. But I feel like men wanna experiment with me and it feels awful because I’m more then that…. I had a date with a guy off Grindr tonight. We saw a movie…. But he tried to do things in the theater and I’m like… oh great here we go again. I finally told him don’t wanna jump into that. Idk if I’ll see him again tbh. He wasn’t a good kisser either which is surprising because he’s reallly cute
He's red flag. It's a nope for me!
Ugh, I don't blame you. If it makes you feel better, I think it's a similar experience with many gay guys. Because we don't fit traditional norms, it's like the the traditional blueprint / life path doesn't exist for us - so many unfortunately can't associate their sexuality with anything other than taboo sex behind closed doors or in the dark (in this case, literally! lol) especially after so much repression.
My advice to you would be to present yourself as "traditionally" as possible, if you want to attract more committal, relationship-type guys. For example, get off Grindr! Regular dates are possible on there but the odds are stacked against you. Turn to Hinge or Bumble maybe?
You seem to be in your own little bubble and have a high bar which makes me think you will remain single indefinitely unless you are really willing to start compromising on some of your ideals.