What was your "I was the only one to get away" story? r/AskReddit | Reddit Jar
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- Опубликовано: 12 ноя 2019
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Развлечения
props to the girl who hosted the party and saved the guy by sending him out the window
She's a bro, and a pro ganer
@CORKY Why would he be joking?
wifey material
"and that's how taco bell simultaneously destroyed and saved my ass" i think they are going to tell that story to there kids one day
popg21 the mobile player their
LuQ_Kn1gh7 thank you kind human.
popg21 the mobile player a small price to pay for survival
popg21 the mobile player their* kids
Time Stamp?
Imagine these as a fable. Depending, the moral is either: "Hide." "Lie to cops." "Be uber lucky." "Just walk away." or "Be genuinely polite and it'll be okay."
I mean, that last one is a pretty good moral
@@voidimperial1179 Agreed.
xD fables of the twenty-first century
@@lvightbluex4512 Heck yeah.
I dunno man, I think the second one is the most useful....
I was expecting brutal sad stories about how groups gotten murdered and they barely made it out
Me too
Then again, half the reddit community dont leave their homes so...
same
Its be extremely rare to find people willing to talk about their experiences since they would relive the memories
Those so-called missionaries didn't believe in the goodwill of the people paying them back with homemade food. That means they didn't truly believe what they themselves preach.
The redflag for any food in a field work is not being exposed to heat or fire at any moment (trust me it's a avoid at all cost situation) honestly as a brasilian living in the north region is pretty upsetting seen some people that don't even drink water (bottled water).
And that's why God punished them with food poisoning.
and they got bit in the *ss for it.
If that's not divine retribution I don't know what is.
Isn't everything divine retribution since God predestined it all?
Dude, I would have ate the fuck out of that Mexican food, those people were crazy
Here’s mine, I call it “being unpopular pays off”
One day, me and my friends decided we didn’t feel like going to music class. The class was an hour long, and in the bottom floor. So we decided to go into the bathroom for the whole period. My two friends were working on their essays, and I was just chilling since I was finished the essay. Then we heard the principal over the announcements “Could friend 1 and friend 2 come to the office please? Thank you.” Both my friends were called to the office but I wasn’t. Turns out during the class someone noticed my friends weren’t there but no one noticed I was gone. See being unpopular pays off! I just waited for the bell and left after that. Felt bad for my friends, they didn’t get in much trouble though. Just a warning. Edit: Whoa wait 111 likes? No one break it. It’s perfect lmao.
I did this but my teacher found me and my friend because someone snitched that I wasn't there and nobody noticed that my friend wasn't either but my friend didn't hide fast enough and got caught too
Music class is boring
MASTER-OF- EVIL yes it is
It’s been broken, I’m sorry. (Not by me)
Lilly UWU Rip alright.
Myself and five other drunk teens pulled into Grand Union parking lot in a ‘64 Lincoln and tumbled out. We were intending to go sit in the park, but just as we exited the vehicle, a cop car screeched up and two cops jumped out. Everybody scattered, and I took off through the park. And for some reason, both cops chased me! I climbed over a stone wall, ran some more, jumped the fence separating the park from the old folks home, and raced around the corner of the building, both cops in hot pursuit. As I rounded the corner, my feet slipped on the wet grass and I fell and ended up rolling right underneath a big bush just as the cops charged past. I stayed there for maybe half an hour, and then got up and walked home. Turned out that there was more than one squad car, and my five buddies all got popped. Just one of those times when I lucked out and was saved by divine providence.
ToddtheExploder popped?
Hahaclassic small peep vs big peep situation. Slammin peep always wins
Ok boomer
@@hotsauceman976 Ok zoomer
ъолк ъолк did, did you just *UNO REVERSE ME*
The teacher was once roll calling the names to check if each and every one of us had done the math homework... So if you have done it nothing happens, if you didn't you get minus marks and scolded.
I didn't do it....
*He literally accidentally skipped my name* 🤭
𝕃𝕀𝕋𝕋𝔼ℝ𝔸𝕃𝕃𝕐 𝔸 𝔻ℝ𝔼𝔸𝕄 ℂ𝕆𝕄𝔼 𝕋ℝ𝕌𝔼 𝕐𝔸𝕃𝕃
@Tasty Toast what kind of elementary was that
@Tasty Toast wtf please tell me this school got sued what kind of crap is that
Tasty Toast lier
Yeah it happened to one of my friends
10:43 does anyone else think this is a summary of the end of A New Hope from Vaders perspective
That’s exactly what it is
Yea
That is exactly what it is dude
It is.
Or some high officer
I love that Guitar Hero story. I still play it from time to time.
Also, 21:54 is alternate timeline Leroy Jenkins
this is mine:
We were playing lazer tag with the whole of our class. our team were doing well but we were tired so we hid in a wendy house. the instructor peeked his head round the door and told us to stay there. i sensed that something was wrong so i told my team that we should go, but they didn't want to. so i crawled out the window by myself. i ran and his behind a wooden fence. a minute later my whole team were out. exept me. the other team were looking for me so that they could get me out. from behind my fence i killed them off one by one and they were trying to figure out where i was. i got all of them out and one the game by myself!
This isn’t very dramatic, but me and my siblings were playing on an older playground that happened to have no other kids on it. This isn’t too important, but the playground was designed to shape like a pirate ship and I still think it was cool. We eventually found a little pole that could slide down to the lower level, and after I went down, my siblings started screaming. I was really confused so I walked out of the playground to get away from whatever they were screaming about and they started bolting away from the playground.
Turns out, there was a hornet nest at the top of the playground, and when I went down the pole I shook them up a bit and basically unleashed a bunch of hornets on my poor brother and sister, while I just watched in confusion.
This incident is also how we found out that my sister had a moderate allergy to hornets. And by moderate I mean that her entire arm where she got stung was swollen. My brother got a few stings on his legs and arms but was mostly fine besides the trauma. I got away with no stings.
Well you didn't know it was there
MASTER-OF- EVIL none of us really knew it was there, but since I went first, I didn’t get attacked by the swarm
This is mine pretty laid back but still one of my favorite memories:
When I was in K5(for all you people who don't know it is like pre-grade 1) my whole class got in trouble for talking so much, the teacher,let's call her Mrs. Lee, threaten to call the 1st grade teacher to come beat us with this very thick and hard ruler she had. Now this teacher had a reputation for her beatings so we really didn't want to get one. Some kids tried to ask to use the bathroom or try to escape class somehow, but it didn't work since the teacher knew what was up. Mrs. Trunchbull(for comedic purposes and how she dressed that she be her name) walked into our class and greeted Mrs. Lee and the rest of the class and asked what was the problem. Mrs. Lee told her and everyone had to get up and surround Mrs. Trunchbull so we could receive it. Now I wasn't really a child who did bad things in short I was in much short good kid but that didn't mean I was going to get my behind beat. So what I did was pretend to be fixing my shoes and duck under the desk(I was sitting in my chair). A friend of mine told me to go up but I just said I had to fix my shoe. My shoe was Velcro.. She left me behind while I stayed under there until everyone got beat and told off. Mrs. Lee and Mrs. Trunchbull eventually walked outside to talk for a bit. I then popped my head up and turned to my friend and said "So how was the beating? " the shocked look on her face when she realized what I meant and told her what I did was priceless.
5th grade. This was when I had an evil substitute teacher, who always picked on me. One Thursday, which happened to be the day before my orthodontist appointment, she announced that until 1 girl's mom came (for some reason) we couldn't leave. Ended up dismissing myself early (even though it was already time to leave), and I ran downstairs to my mom. I will never forget that day. I still wonder how long everyone else had to wait for. Along the way, though, some kids said I was "ditching", so I replied " it's after the bell, so it's not ditching".
During high school I was in band, and we were in a hotel during a trip. Me and two of my roommates were planning to sneak out into another groups room to “party” (meaning playing never have o ever and shit). We did it and had a blast, and then we got back. Two of the people who snuck out were sisters and they told their mom the story (not telling on us, just talking), but their mom worked for the district so she told our band director. The next time we stayed in a hotel the chaperones were watching their room like a hawk, but didn’t care to guard the room I was in. I’ve never gotten in trouble for it.
So in my school, if you acted out at lunch, you had to sit at a specific table known as the detention table. I don't remember what I did but it involved dropping my lunch on a teacher's shoes. Now this teacher was nasty and clearly hated kids. So she got VERY mad and sent me to the detention table even though it was an accident. I was sitting with the more unruly kids and they decided that they didn't feel like going to detention and were gonna make a break for it when lunch was over and the kids left in droves back to class. Lunch detentions are given after lunch and students at the detention table had to stay an extra 10 minutes to be properly written up. Don't know why they did it like that but it was essential for my next course of action. See, I never had a detention in my life at that point and wasn't gonna start then so I agreed to it. So when lunch finishes and everyone got up to leave, we all bolted. The nasty teacher saw us and yelled at us. She was far more focused on the unruly kids since they were repeat offenders than me, a nerd. So she ended up catching all of them and gave them a whole week of detention. Except me, cause like Assassin's Creed I blended into the crowd of kids and was never noticed. The next day, no one approached me about it cause it was clear none of them remembered me cause I was a nobody. And because I was never formally written up (nasty teacher didn't even ask my name), I didn't have to go to detention at all.
And that's how I avoided detention back in 3rd grade.
In school I was in a group that did a lot of drugs, in and out of school it made no difference. The senior leadership team (SLT) defo knew what was happening as we’d stagger into each class absolutely obliterated, but couldn’t do anything about it because they had no hard evidence. Eventually they managed to get some kind of ‘evidence’ for one of us, and the whole group was brought in. Me and one other person were the only ones not to get expelled due to not being able to find drugs in our bag
I was lucky because all I had on me that day was some thc vape liquid (I know, I know) and it had no label so they assumed it was just normal
After lots of meetings with parents and the SLT clearly getting angry they did not find anything they let me go
Yeah I didn’t like my SLT much
@The Golden Carrot I always hated middle school
What school was this?
to be fair you were a druggo, they probable didnt like you either
"Playing black jack ...... but the table was on fire" I... had to think for a second XD
Cops: “can I speak to your manager”
The teens who got caught: *managers going to the Karen’s
The teen survivors: *I AM THE M A N A G E R*
eggroll I got a seizure
Experiment Zean I got cardiac arrest
@@wearefarmersbumbabumbumbum1620 I got coronavirus
i lost braincells
reading that
@@vathanarajthambiyappah2567
I got Corona virus + Whiplash from reading that
That first one reminds me of my junior year of highschool where the gym flooded and the floor warped and for insurance reasons we weren't allowed to play on it. So we spent most of the PE classes that year playing super smash brothers , mario kart, and a few other games people brought in. Now that school has 2 gyms, so the odds of that ever happening again is next to nothing.
How did it flood?
@@MASTEROFEVIL really heavy rain, and then it came in under the door which goes directly outside out the back of the school to where the football field is, and it warped the floor really bad
I was with a few friend one night and we had just come walking from Walmart. One of us gals got the bright idea of ding dong ditching a close friend’s house. Of course, we all thought it was a fun stupid idea and decided to do it. We walked to the neighborhood and planned. I was too chicken along with one of my other friends, so we waited on the sidewalk while the other two went up to the door. BANG BANG BANG. We all took off and hid on the side of one of the neighbors house. I expected someone to come running out all loud and shout something but it was all quiet. So, we all assumed they just didn’t care and we decided to just head home. Well as we were leaving and picking up the snacks we hid, truck lights lit up behind us and sure enough it was the an uncle of the friend who came out to look around. We were dumb and panicked, so we immediately took off sprinting towards an alley with the truck almost right behind us (so much for not acting suspicious). I saw a bunch of really tall grass and dove in. For some reason, two of the others kept running with the truck chasing them. I watched from the grass as the two and the truck turned the corner and disappeared. I didn’t know what to do so I was just going to chill out. I assumed the third girl went a different direction and either got caught already or was hiding somewhere. Turns out, she followed me into the tall grass, but we didn’t find that out until I tried calling her and I heard her phone go off a few feet away from me. Both of us decided to just meet them back at the house we’re staying. The two ended up getting caught and got a whole ear full from the friend’s uncle. *Yeah I know it’s just supposed to be just me not getting caught, but this is the only funny story that was close to the topic.
I would've died
lol shenanigans
The best doctor on the planet: Tee Ell Doctor.
EndlessNomad: I was sitting there for a minute thinking “what?” Then I was like “ohhhhhhhh”
Kinda related I guess. Me and my dad got out of being stuck in traffic for four hours because we took the train to my grandparents instead of driving like my mom and brother did. They were stuck for four hours only 15 minutes from home and my grandparents live about 5 hours away
We were a group of friends where i grew up, boys and girls hanging out about 5 of each. And some became more than friends, broke up and then two others became an item, broke up. As teenagers do.
But there was one girl i didnt even get to kiss.
Lucky me, she had oral herpes. Which all other four boys got.
Now i dont know if she got it from one of the boys. But i don't have it. So i was the only one who "got away".
i like to think she knew she had it and decided not to give it to you
EEEWWWW!!! Just..... fucking eww!
Lucky
I have one of these:
When I was in middle school, there was this stupid rule that if you were late to lunch you would get detention. They had teachers standing out in the hallway asking for your school IDs and waiting for you to write your name down. Well since my name is so goddamn long, it gets cut off in all of the teachers attendance systems and also coincidentally my school ID. So I proceeded to show them my ID with my cut off name on it and write that down. The group I was with all got detention and phone calls and they just sat there wondering who the last name could be
Robot: that blew over a 0
Me: not even decimals?
Robot: 0.02
Me: wElp
This JUST happened to me:
So I was in school and we had a sub. So me and a huge group of friend left class 3 minutes early to get chips, when we walked down the stairs the principle was waiting for us. We tried running to the class but she locked all the doors. But before they closed I got through them, she then walked and collected all the others and took them to the office. I walked into class and then I found out all of them had detention. I just got VERY lucky. I am now texted one of them and none of them snitched on me.
I had the opposite.
I walked into a room, because a couple of classmates were there. All I wanted to do was ask them if they want to play a game.
But I walked in on them picking on a girl, bullying her and she ran past me, crying. Right then, a teacher walked by and chewed all of us out for bullying the girl (even though I had nothing to do with the matter). But since said teacher was pos, she wouldn't even let me explain.
I was actually friends with the girl later-on.
Once I got locked in the bathroom in elementary school with like 10 other kids because of some "Contest" turns out it was just them sticking hands down urinals. The campus supervisor walked in while 3 of them were doing it. Then there were only 9. And they saw feet in a stall, and opened it and found another kid doing it to the toilet. Then there was 8. 5 kids tried making a mad dash for the door, but the vice principal walked in that same moment and they were busted too. Final 3. I was just sitting on a rail in the stall, with a friend showing me the pictures he took. We removed any pictures of us right as the principal entered along with a few more staff members and found us. We showed him the pictures and all of the kids who were caught were suspended for the day, besides a kid with only a talking to (confused how he didnt get in that much trouble still). Also, they never found the other guy, but we had pictures of him so they knew who it was, and suspended him. Turns out he somehow snuck out in the chaos and ran into a storage closet. (After school so he hid for a while) We didn't get a punishment, with no proof of our involvement. We did actually laugh and stuff, but we didn't stick our hands in toilets tho.
Once in fifth grade me and my friends didn’t want to be in the lunchroom so we snuck to our teachers room and ate there and all was well when we heard the janitor and the teacher of the class in the hallway. One of my friends ran out and got caught, the other two( one boy one girl) hid in a closet together( it was cramped...) and I went in a cabinet cause i was the small kid in school( i still am) and im asian and the smartest so when the teacher came in he told the janitor he needed to clear out the closet... my friends got busted and my teacher was pissed af. I was smart enough to not be scared and to take my chance at running away so I slowly opened the cabinet and behind the teacher, on the table, i grabbed my lunchbox and sprinted out of there(I was also super fast) so once in the hall the teacher was like “ hey who was that!” And i bolted down the hallway made a right, turned left, down the stairs, turned right towards the gym, hid behind the vending machine, i checked the time on my watch, it was almost time to go so i bought a bottle of tummy yummies ( a drink a real good one) with some change and i headed upstairs. But after i got back to math( third block which was spilt onto two bc of lunch) the teachers all began questioning us, in math, science, social studies, and ELA. I was known as the good kid so i acted like i had no clue what was going on. And i guess you could say i was the *only one to get away* THE END.
I got a story
Aight, so it begins in a dance at my high school, it was my freshman year.
Basically, me and some friends of mine were taking advantage of the fact that teachers weren't checking the computer lab and well, tons of computers were just sitting there to be used. Some of the shenanigans going down included; A kid was controlling some wireless bluetooth speakers he had with a computer and playing utter nonsense (Barney theme song and shit), another kid was using an administrator password to change all the automatic lockscreens on the computers, several kids were looking up interesting topics 😏, and whatnot. I was one of the people who was just kinda watching it go down.
Anyway, I leave to go use the restroom while it's all going down in the computer lab. I was in there maybe 15 minutes (eating a whole pizza myself was a mistake). I start walking back, and as I'm coming around the corner I see the principal, vp, and other teachers standing there yelling at everyone.
I backed up and just headed back to the main dance.
I was the only one not caught
Someone actually tried to snitch on me, but for whatever reason I was apparently considered too trustworthy to do such, and was never approached about this.
Anyway that's my long, boring story
Sometimes it pays off to be the quiet kid
9:00
Wasn't paying attention to the screen and heard
"After gorging on some sweet piss"
Nearly lost my shit laughing
So, in middle school, my teacher had just assigned detention for everybody for, I don't know what. When, I accidentally said Fuck loudly. Well, my teacher thought it was the guy who sat in front of me who had said it and gave him another detention on top... It sucked cuz he was my crush... 😂😅😥
My story was from when i was in 5th grade, the 5th graders at my school got to go to a camp which had a curfew and chaperones. Well one night i went with some kids in my cabin to generally screw around in the dark, there were about 5-10 of us. Some other cabins heard us and snitched to the night chapernones meant to catch ppl who snuck out. I heard the footsteps and hid behind a tree ( i was rly short, skinny and fast) and then i crawled away from the flashlights on us being behind a tree, i was in shadow. After i was pretty far away u stood up and bolted to my cabin. Only 3 of us werent caught and the ppl who were caught only got a slap on the wrist bc the chaperones were their parents.
I remember me & my class didn't want to go to our last class (it was just an extra class everyone got to choose every semester) so we just all hung out in the cafe. 1 of the teachers noticed a big group of kids laughing, eating & on their phones. I was next to a fire exit door so I saw the teacher coming over & didn't bother telling anyone i just said bye to everyone & left. 15 or so mins later i see my class getting escorted to their classes by different teachers. They didn't get into much trouble just a long lecture & their phones taken off of them until the end of the day. I was the only person that didn't get into trouble & my class didn't tell the teacher. I really miss those guys :(
I remember a long time ago I was playing capture the flag
It was 8th graders vs 7th graders and the 7th graders (my team) had this really dumb idea that there would be this really big group of us that would just bolt into the 8th graders’ territory and try to get the items that we were supposed to bring to our side.
We devised a plan that we would get the faster runners in both our PE classes (we were playing with only 2 PE classes) to run to the items and then run back. While the other kids that couldn’t run as fast as us would just defend the whole thing
We wanted to have another group of kids that were slightly slower than the fast kids to sneak onto the 8th graders’ side just in case everyone got caught. But it didn’t work out so it was just a quarter of a PE class that would run to the 8th graders while the rest defended and a few people went rogue.
So, I was standing with my group and waited for the round to start. It started and we all started booking towards the items. The 8th graders started freaking out and laughing while they chased us because they didn’t think we’d do the same thing as them because at the corner of my eye I saw a small group of 8th graders running onto my team’s side.
Most of my group made it to the safe zone where the items were, but some people who were running in the front and back were caught and were forced to walk back to their side. We had a certain amount of time for how long we could be at the safe zone (10 seconds) and almost all the items were taken. So now all the attention was on my group.
Our 10 seconds were up and we were forced to get out of the zone and try and run back to our side to get the points. Most of my group was caught since the 8th graders basically surrounded the safe zone making it almost impossible for us to escape without getting our flag pulled. The few of us who DID escape were being chased down by the rest of the 8th graders. I kept looking around and saw my teammates getting their flags pulled by like 5 people at the same time.
I had a small group of 8th graders chasing me and the one who was at the front was yelling “GET THIS ONE! GET THIS ONE!” While pointing at me so I started freaking out because now the attention was on me. My teammates who were running with me were yelling at me to hurry up because someone was getting too close to my flag.
So without thinking I just threw the hall I had in my hands and one of my teammates caught it. It was just one point that we got but that it was the greatest thing to ever happen to us.
The teachers just laughed at us and the 8th graders were just tired from chasing my group around.
It was awesome.
The people that went rogue were the ones who got us most of the points though because everyone was focused on our group. So in a way, we had a group that could sneak onto the 8th grade side
was it one of those days were you were allowed to play in the hallways?
21:10 when that one kid has to read in class, and has to say every word slowly and clearly.
To learn about U
U.S history
17:49 and the lord declared that they that scorn others will themselves suffer, and lo and behold a group that wanted to indulge in their own food and not the freely offered food begat food poisoning while the pure one escaped a gruesome fate may this person's name go down in history as a wise woman
What?
14:17 He thought you did it my dude. Everyone else around you probably knew it too. You were given mercy for the kids that day. Continue to be thankful! :)
I have a story
So I was in the 5th grade and we were in English class and it was the end of the period before lunch and I was starving. So because I sat all the way in the back, I started eating my chips from my lunch ( it was Doritos) so I have one of those humongous triangle shaped Doritos and as it is stuffed in my mouth, my teacher caught me and he asked me what I was doing and I didint answer so I stuck my head under my desk and continued eating the chip and everyone was looking at me so when I finished i looked up and I said “ nothing “... He continued with the lesson. Everyone got mad at me after class because they all knew that I was the favorite so I wasn’t gonna get in trouble. Welp, thanks for reading my story.
me and my friends all was messing around in school, we broke something.
i was the only one to confess, later that day. i find out everyone has to do pay for the item, i got away with it XD.
In 2018, I started a T-posing trading during a Louisiana Comicon. There were maybe 20 people, tposing in a line, going all over the place. A few people noticed the security was eyeing us and talking through their walkie-talkies. I had a feeling we were gonna get kicked out and I noped the fuck away from the t-pose train. I didn't see anyone else that was a part of the train for the rest of the day until after I left.
I have a strange one.
When I was like 5-7, I was with a group of friends, outside in the back of a bowling alley. We were throwing rocks at other rocks, trying to make sparks, and a cop car pulls up, and the police get out and start walking towards us. We all realize we might be in trouble, we were all young, and so we ran back inside. I hid in the corner of the locker room, I could see the entrance of the room, it was also right next to one of the Arcade entrances so I could see that too. Now, the back entrance we used is in the Arcade, so the cops grabbed everyone else and brought them out of the Arcade, I watched and the fear of being caught I held my breath and let them pass. I don't think my friends know about this, let alone remember me.
i do have reddit, but i feel like i wanna share my story in here...
My mother has a friend and she likes to draw on peoples faces when they are sleeping...
me and my brother thought it would be funny to draw on my mothers face... (my mothers friend was at my house at the time).
we had went to bed at like 12 and it was really late... my mothers friend agreed on drawing on my mothers face but since it was so late at night, she was tired... (me and my brother were sleeping in the same room at the time). my mothers friend wanted my brother and I to wake her up at around 1. me and my brother made a deal that one of us would stay awake and whenever the person got tired, we would wake the other person up for them to do the same (we were both tired) anyway, I was staying up first and i passed out first thing, so did my brother... I managed to wake up at 5 and woke my brother up, he was kinda mad at me.... we debated on weather or not to wake up my mothers friend.. we chose not to. both of us ended up walking downstairs to my mothers room (she sleeps in the basement)... my brother went in first since he had the marker, I waited i couple seconds outside the door ... Then I heard my mother ask my brother what he was doing (she must have been awake or woken up) I then ran as fast as i could leaving my brother.. I waited all morning for him to come back up (5 to 9 ish ) and feeling guilty..
i still feel guilty to this day...
my brother said that when she woke up or , when she asked him what he was doing, he simply just said "im having a nightmare" as he is known for having nightmares and waking up everyone in the house.. he then got in the bed with my mother...
he also said he had a bad sleep with a Sharpie in his pocket.
I never got out of trouble
In my kindergarten-3 campus I'd brought a plastic bag with a couple scoops of Country Time Lemonade powder, to my dismay whilst sharing with a group of peers, the bag was snatched away from me by school staff with notions about a baggy containing powder.
My introduction to weed was just my parents saying I look stoned and made me breathe for them to smell, then asking me how long I'd been using "Marijuana" which was the first I'd heard that word, or ever seen someone being paranoid.
My first memory of alcohol was seeing my brother, before I was even in kindergarten, drinking from a mystery bottle from the then newly received antique bar; the memory was jarred from the past at 21 when I browsed the liquor isle and realized I knew the flavor of several bottles whose names I'd never read but recognizable bottle type and label motif stood out: amaretto, kalua, creme de menth, irish cream, triple sec, butterscotch whiskey. Nobody had introduced me to these flavors but I was familiar with how much I liked them once. My parents had raged at me in high school a decade earlier-later about the thieving consumption and the gall of leaving the empty bottles for them to find: I felt scapegoated and assumed my brother had let me take the abuse; but I'd drank the memory of drinking away, and wouldn't piece it together till 21.
This isn’t really one but it’s kinda funny and somewhat fits the genre so:
It was in seventh grade, LA class. I was in a group of people I knew, one of them being an English learner. There was this group of those types of kids, and tried to curse in Chinese (they weren’t Chinese)
So, they were being extra annoying that day and asked the English learner to write them an insult in Chinese. So, me being annoyed and having a wisecrack moment, I told her to write: I am an idiot in Chinese. She taught those kids how to say it, and they proceeded to say in loudly in front of the class. Looked at people in the eyes and said it.
When they asked what it meant, I didn’t lie and said it means you’re an idiot. They bought it. And continued saying it. Most of the class was Asian, and understood. But not that group. They tried accusing me and the English learner, but we were the only good group of the class, so the teacher straight up ignored their claims.
No one told those kids that they called themselves idiots.
In the fourth grade, I was sitting with the boys (they were not bad kids, just VERY mischievous) and we were playing hot potato and it got wild, and the teacher came in and got us in trouble. I'm a small kid, so he didn't see me at first, then noticed me. I hate getting in trouble so I stopped immediately, and the teacher started questioning us, but the guys bailed me out.
Bless the bois.
Another story:
This one also takes place in the fourth grade. Me and my friend signed up for this thing called "Lunchelping", where we would go to the younger kid's classrooms and basically babysit them while the teachers were eating. Apparently while we were over there, my class had a Pizza eating contest, and they were so loud, my teacher banned them from talking during lunch.
We weren't there, and the teacher let me and my friend talk during lunch.
It was awesome.
When I was in elementary school, I make a plan where I would sneak into the halls and hide until lunch started so I could skip the line, and other people started following me. Well all of them got caught and brought into another room to get talked to or something, except for me because I actually tried to be sneaky. Nobody said that I started it so I got away with it
heres on of mine: i lived in a pretty big neighborhood with probably over 5,000 homes. there was a bunch of random places around us like mcdonald’s or target so we would always go there. but there were times where our parents would just decide we werent allowed outside of the neighborhood. surprisingly me and my group of friends were the only people who were really known throughout this neighborhood just because of the dumb shit we did. one night my friends were spray painting a piping entrance where we were known to hangout. i was there but i didnt spray paint anything. but i knew that i still wouldve got in trouble if i was there. so i left. the next day i found out all of the people there besides me were talked to by the cops and had to try and get all the spray paint out.
when i was in high school, basically the entire year decided to skive the last two periods of class. we walked away from the school, and just chilled smoking weed down the street. me and about 10 people decide to go back towards the school. me and this guy who’s about 6ft 5 at the time decide to leg it to go get our buses. one of the teachers went behind the wall after we had left and everyone else got suspended lol. (i had a really strict school)
Mine was when my friends and I after recess everyone lining up. (This was in the 4th grade) My friends were chasing this boy that kept bullying me. Then he finally got caught and told me to bully him like hit and kick. At the time I was the youngest of my friend group and I always looked up to them like they were kings. Then I started to kick him and hit him. Then a yard duty comes up. Looks at my friends with an angry look. Then she looks at me and says: “Wow ______ you’ve became so brave!”
My friends literally laughed so hard
While I’m just there trying to laugh with them not knowing what we are laughing at. And while my bully is just like: “what... they were just bullying me!”
Another one was when I brought my phone to school. (Also in 4th grade)
We were in the bathroom then a 6th grader came in and was like: “are you supposed to bring your phone here?”
My friends said: “No... but don’t tell!”
she then left I give my friends my phone because I had to go use the restroom. Then the Vice Principal came in and yelled who’s got a phone here my friends hid it quickly thank Goodness I barely came out of the restroom and said I had nothing to do with it and I was just using the restroom. Since I had to go to a different class afterwards my friends put it in my backpack. Though I was aloud on Friday. But only for free Friday.
So that’s my second 4th grade story. I did many bad things in 4th grade though they were tiny ones. So I was like the “secret bad kid” but the teachers thought I was a good kid. I tell my friends be glad your friends with me because I grant you special permissions from teachers. We stayed friends till some moved. And some left. But overall we were good friends
Wow the dude who was shooting up near the macaroni grill was hanging out with dickheads! They ALL tried to rat him out!? Ive been caught by a cop while my friends and i were shooting heroin MULTIPLE times and never got arrested for it but there was one time where i hid my rig somehow and didnt have warrants like my friends did so i was the only one who got away
The last story... I did that once on a death knight
I am like the only person in my high school graduating class (Class of 2019) to not have depression and anxiety.
Lucky
The thumbnail is just golden.
Mine story happened in middle school. I went to a small private school for middle school and after school we had this thing called resource. It basically was an optional study hall after school where you can ask questions to any teacher you wanted. In order to do after school activities you had to go to resource first. My 7th grade home room teacher was new that year so my friends and I would just walk out and hang out in the hall way with our friends from another class. As we were talking one day, the 6th grade religion teacher who is know for being strict comes out of her classroom and starts yelling at us. My friend Alana and I just sprinted into the bathroom which we happened to be standing in front of. We hid in the stall while our other friends got chewed out and were written up.
A bunch of kids at my middle school got expelled because they found them smoking weed inside of the school bathrooms. Out of the 8 people in there, just one kind survived because he had to pee, so he was inside a stall when the teachers caught them and let him go because he was literally just peeing.
i love these vids so much to have a little peak into someone's life you probably would never have known existed otherwise, the internet can weirdly be so wholesome
I was at a camp once at the dorm where everyone would take out their sleeping bags and sleep on the 2nd level,the first level were just some pillars(there were 6+ dorms so mine was the first one)one guy literally woke everyone up at 4am and also making everyone think it was 6am,me and my buddy went to the toilet to piss and when we came back everyone at the dorm was scolded and all of us were told to go back to sleep,Ik it’s just a scolding but lmao
When I was a kid, my friends and I broke a window. I managed to hide in the bushes. I was the only kid to not get grounded for three months.
This is a stupid story but worth sharing(now that i think of it I have 2 stories) 1: In 5th grade my class had a substitute teacher, and every one (aside from me and my sister) were being very loud and rude. So the teacher wrote a note explaining what happened. Next day and the real teacher asked who was being a bad kid. Everyone starts pointing fingers and shouting. So she asks some kids and everyone said: well *me and sister* were good. So everyone except me and a few others didn't get in trouble. 2: In kindergarten, I started to play hide and seek with a kid, lets cal him Wyatt, and I got bored and didn't want to play with him anymore. So I did what I had to do, and ran away and hid on the playground. My friends came and told me to play with him. They made me go on the jungle gym to a place that was kind of boxed off where they had me "cornered" but there was a twisty slide behind me, so I went down it and ran and hid from them and did this for a couple of days until they forgot about it.
Seth mcfarlane: so I was drunk ....
I HAD A TACO BELL AD RIGHT AFTER THE TACO BELL STORY
I was actually one of three people who got away, but this should still count! In mid to late 2015, I was moving into my first house with a couple of roommates. As we were moving in, a guy who lived in the neighborhood drove by and saw us. He got out of his car and asked who the new neighbors were. When we identified ourselves, he invited us to a party he was having at his place in a couple of days, handing me a piece of paper with his name and address and giving directions. The roomies didn't want to go, but my mom kept harping on me about how I should be more social, so I figured "what's the harm?" A couple days later, I leave at 7:00 pm to go to this party, guy lives like a block away. I knock on the door, guy opens up and lets me in, saying how happy he was I came. There were a bunch of other people at this party, some of them drinking beer and smoking the devil's lettuce, which isn't a big deal since I live in a state where it's legal and I already have a card on me. For the record, I don't smoke. A few minutes later, in walks a dude with a heavy looking backpack which he proceeded to take off, drop next to the coffee table, and, to my surprise and silent horror, pulled out some of the biggest blocks of coke I'd ever seen, and no, I ain't talkin' soda! To make things worse, this neighborhood was located near a school! Not like a High School or a Middle School, but whatever that school is between Kindergarten and Elementary! I looked around as people started to partake in the elicit white powder and, sure enough, there was another guy and woman standing near me who were just uncomfortable and just as out of place as I was. Luckily, the others decided to respect our decision to stay sober. About thirty minutes later, I'm sitting in the dining area, thinking about ditching and booking it back home, when the girl from earlier approached me and said in a low voice that she and the other guy were going to sneak out and get some pizza and asked if I wanted to join them. The fact that they stayed sober too meant I could trust them more than anyone else at this party and for a guy my age, it's considered a cardinal sin to refuse pizza under any circumstance, so I agreed. It was easy to sneak out because most of the others were out in the back yard doing other things and those who stayed in the living room were too out of their gourds to even realize we were even there in the first place! We got in their car and went to a pizza joint downtown. We got to talking while waiting for our pizza, learned that they were fiancés who were visiting their family from out of state. The host of the coke party was a soon-to-be ex mutual friend and they decided to go see him before going home to prepare for their wedding a couple of months later. Needless to say, he was no longer invited. After a couple of hours of eating some damn good pizza and playing games in the arcade, we decided to call it a night and they drove me home. We reached the neighborhood and, lo and behold, six police cruisers and three S.W.A.T vans blocking the road in front of the house where the party was held and people being brought out in cuffs! we took another way to my house, and I made it home with two boxes of pizza and a two-liter each of Root Beer and Seven-Up to share with the roommates. Told them what happened and made a pun about the party being a bust. Later, I ripped up the paper with the guy's address, flushed it down the toilet and went to bed, secure in the knowledge that the next time my mom starts nagging me about being more social, I could just tell her this story and hold it over her head that her "advice" nearly got me in a shit-ton of trouble. I never saw anyone from that party again, thank Hylia!
TL;DR Ditched a coke party to get pizza, those who didn't got arrested!
Early
I would have been earlier if I wasn’t in a Roblox life or death situation
I never knew you could get charged for underage drinking, cops in the town where I did HS were there during the post-prom party just to be sure that everyone was safe, but didn’t rlly gave a shit about ppl drinking (ppl were like Max 17)
I don't have any really dramatic ones, but I have a couple school ones. The 2nd is long, so feel free to skip me if want.
1. In 4th grade, by December I had earned the nickname "teacher's pet", as I was the only one in our class to have not been physically & verbally assaulted by our teacher. Yes, you read that right! For the SLIGHTEST percieved disrespect, inattentiveness, or even genuine misunderstanding & asking for something to be explained a 2nd time, our teacher would stomp over to the child, grab them by the upper arm hard enough that her nails dug into skin through your sleeve (the crescent marks would always be visible for hours afterwards & even kids that didn't cry would be seen rubbing their arm from the pain long after), yank you from your seat to stand & face her, & then scream at you for a full 2-3 minutes while shaking you. At that point no one had ever explained to us that it was actually illegal for her to physically hurt us like that. We didn't know to show the marks to an adult immediately before they faded overnight & ask for an adult to help catch her in the act. The only physical punishment allowed by the school system was a paddling on the butt by the principal if a parent had signed the form. He was actually a nice guy who only did that for real behavior issues as a last resort before suspension. But none of the other teachers ever saw her do it, & so they just overlooked her yelling when they heard it because she would later exaggerate the story of what the kid supposedly did, & so if we complained to them we were told to not lie about a teacher hurting someone & we "needed to just suck it up when she lectured us & stop misbehaving". I was generally quiet, not a fidgety kid, never needed anything explained a 2nd time, & so I never did get abused by her. In lunchtime discussions, according to kids that had her the year before, I was the only one they knew to ever escape her claws.
2. In high school, 9th grade: I made friends with a girl in my P.E. class. On the surface, she was totally opposite me: skinny, pretty (not saying I'm ugly, just average), a C to low B grade average, no plans for college, & even at only 14 openly admitted that she smoked, drank sometimes at parties, & her mom knew she regularly had sex with her boyfriend. Yet when I took the time to talk to her, I saw she was also a sweet person, had college potential if she really tried (but her family didn't encourage her or seem to care what she did as long as she passed high school), & she was just fun to chat with.
One day, we met in the hall on the way to the gym & she said she felt like skipping, just to not deal with our coach that was ALWAYS in a bad mood. It's the last class of the day, she was already stressed from a big test earlier, she just wanted a peaceful hour before the rush home to do the ton of homework she had. It was clear she was gonna skip anyway, so I tell her I'll join her, as I feel I better keep an eye on her so she doesn't get bored alone & do something risky. We duck in the bathroom intending to wait til the halls are clear & teachers would be taking roll, so we can then just slip out the back door & go hang out in the 1 place you can't get caught. It was a small area that actually had no class windows looking over it & was really just maintenance access to one of the a.c. units, but used as a shortcut between buildings by some students smart enough to pay attention the school map & look for the unmarked doors. She goes to use a toilet & lights a cigarette, leaving the door open for us to talk, I comment how I've told her before that's bad for her & plus it might be enough to set off the smoke alarms & get us caught. The late bell rings, so we know the halls should be clear in half a minute. After a couple puffs, she asks me to hold it long enough for her to wipe & wash her hands. So what happens just as she's handing it to me? A teacher walks in, of course. The teacher makes her flush it & then proceeds to march us down to the office. We're in luck though, the d***head Vice Principal that usually handles discipline is out, the nice VP is in. He stays calm as the teacher reports how she "caught these 2 girls smoking, saw it being passed between us", & then goes off thinking she has left us to our doom. Nice VP actually calmly asks us why were smoking in school "when there's only an hour left till the end of the day & couldn't we wait to get off grounds & respect the rules?" I stammer about how I wasn't smoking, I don't smoke. He says "Ms. X saw you." My friend jumps in, & leaving out the part about how we had actually been deliberately taking our sweet time in the bathroom because we intended to ditch, explains what happened with the cigarette & even says how I did tell her not to smoke, how in fact I'm her ONLY friend that lectures her that it's bad for her, & her mom knows & doesn't even bother to ask who she gets to buy them for her, much less punish or lecture her. She then, with the most stressed look on her face, says "I'm sorry, I'm trying to quit, but the test in my previous class had me so stressed I thought it wouldn't hurt to get a few puffs in to calm down before having to go deal with Coach X, on account of how she always yells at us about something every class! (swallow tiny sob) I'll take the 3-day 1st offense suspension, but please don't suspend my friend who really didn't do anything but be late while waiting for me. (swallow tiny whimper)"
Honestly, I think my jaw had dropped by the time she finished. He looked at me & said it was nice to see that some kids try to be good influences on friends that need it. He pulled out his notepad, wrote me an excused tardy note "for extenuating circumstances" & said to go on to the gym. My only punishment would be the zero I got for not dressing out & participating that day, so basically no punishment cause 1 zero wouldn't make a difference to my grade. He never even asked my 1st name. About 10 minutes later, she came in the gym with an identical note. After giving it to Coach, she came to sit with me on the bleachers. I asked what happened after I left. She said he lectured her to leave the cigarettes at home, if she got caught with them again then she would be suspended, & he felt that that really wasn't a productive rule anyway other than worries of accidental fires, because missing school shouldn't be a punishment for anyone not being violent. He wrote her up for just 1 hour detention the next day for "not being mindful of getting class on time" so that she wouldn't have the cigarettes on her record. He told her he understood we kids did get stressed, but she needed to listen to me about quitting smoking & if she needed to talk to the counselor about anything to go to him & he'd set it up no questions asked. Nobody caught on that we intended to skip, she just got 1 hour detention, I literally had no consequences & we just hung out til the end of class. 🙂
I’m stupid and don’t understand the home town one. Why couldn’t they leave?
uncletigger k thanks
Hello Sammie
Money, memories, the fact that they might not be able to handle not knowing everyone, also talking to new people is scary
Red Fox 👍
We got the fancy contractor bragging about his security clearance. If only he’d stop scamming the navy with every new ship and aircraft, then maybe I would take him seriously.
My one was quite recent like 4 months ago, me and my friends were exploring this abandoned church or nunnery and i had been walking my dog before i met up with them so i decide I'd explore with them and tied my dog inside the church, the police came and we ran (i untied my dog) and we managed to escape their view but then they drove past us i stopped and they carried on walking, they got stopped and i carried on walking and wasnt talked to because i looked like a dog walker
we used to have the same setup in our school woods. except it was a shopping cart on its side with blankets and whatnot. every single morning my friend and i would go down there to smoke our weed and cigarettes before school, match with the other 4-7 regulars. the staff watched us walk down there but let us because at least we weren’t smoking cigarettes on school probably, and we’d always be back before first period. it was good good times i miss those people.
“I got away in my TIE-advanced”
That one got me good!
2:50 reminds me of John Mulaney when he was talking about secondary locations “I hate secondary locations”.
7:30. That’s a genius line, props to whoever wrote it.
When I was a kid, my sisters and I got into big trouble for something. I don't remember what it was, but it was bad enough that my dad was giving like 3 or four spanks. While my sisters were getting theirs, I booked it to our shared bedroom and climbed on top of the bunk bed. My dad couldn't reach me. I escaped and he didn't even bother trying to spank me later.
Well I had a rather similar story.
We arent allowed to bring our mobile phones or anything similar to highschool. And as far as i know, confiscated items will probably never see the light of day once they're gone.
I was at my last year of highschool when a massive spot-check was made (we are to leave our bags and head to a spot where we will be checked on one by one). I had my phone comcealed underneath my vest, but it still got spotted in the end and my phone gets confiscated.
Of course, now there's a bunch of people who tried appealing in the office to recover their phones. But none were accepted. Rumors had it that confiscated phones will be disposed of. I am particularly attached to my phone, so I planned to try my luck with appealing in the evening after classes are over.
So, later around the evening, I decided to make a move to recover my phone. Upon entering the office, i noticed that there's no one around. There is probably an emergency meeting going on. So I simply walk into the restricted areas, ignoring the CCTV and head to the moderator's room, which happened to be unlocked.
I had to bear witnessed upon THOUSANDS of mobile phones. So much so that it took me a good 5 minutes to try and locate my phone. And once i did, i get the fuck out of the office ASAP and nobody was none the wiser.
To think that the stars aligned in a way that I am the only person to be able to save their phone from who'd-knew-what'll-happen is quite sombering. While I stopped using said phone now, I still kept it with me. It's a relic of my past.
P.S. I'm from somewhere around south east asia
My dad took me to a crack house so I made myself throw up so he would take me to my grandparents house. Thank God he cared enough to do it
i just wanna say one thing. "Breath-a-lizzer."
This sort of counts.
In seventh grade, I had the worst study hall. Everyone was always talking, making moaning noises, talking crap, and playing games.
I was one of three kids that ever remotely behaved. I didn't get along with the other two whatsoever. So I just kept to myself and usually finished my homework.
One day, we have a substitute. Everyone takes this as an excuse to be extra loud and rowdy. There are people insulting the teacher, playing cards, running around the room, and eventually, a few people make an excuse to "study" in the hallway. Now, this was a normal thing in study hall, in case two students wanted to study together without disturbing everyone. But this time, everyone in the room starts saying "I want to study in the hallway too." The next girl wants to follow her friend, and the next people want to go out. By the time the door closed, it was the three of us and the teacher. The one girl asks, "What just happened?" The guy goes, "I don't even know."
And I stayed silent.
The next day, everyone but me and the other two had to go to the front of the class and apologize for their behavior and the way they treated the teacher. They also got detention.
Swearing is a big no-no in our school. Anyone who swore got punished hard. A lot of my mates fell for this, but I was the guy without a filter, and got away every single time.
looking at classic reddit story videos before the ones on TikTok took over hits different
18:10.
Can we just take a second to acknowledge that this guy’s friend was in possession of an honest-to-god police scanner?!
How the fuck did he get one even?!
@@gamerplays1352 *sheugs*
@@gamerplays1352 *shrugs*
this isn’t really a crazy story but me and my group of friends were all sitting at a table during lunch and some kids a year older than us, which were our friends, were walking towards us with their lunch food and since they thought shit would be funny they took their lunches and chucked them into the air. since i saw that shit coming i dipped and food got all over my friends. 😍😍
Tis was bout 9 o’clock and there were 3 of us, all in yr 5/6. We were walking through the back of a park and past an old building when we saw a hobo injecting himself with syringes (obviously getting high) and he said “be careful out here kids” which still sends shivers down my spine to this day, so we walked past him and then ran as fast as our legs could take us. Our houses were in separate directions so we had to part ways. Scariest walk home I’ve ever had
10:40 love the star wars reference.
I had a doctors appointment and didn’t get homework like everyone else lol
I always found that if you and your group of friends have been caught, if you always stand at the back of the group out of sight usually you can just slip away unnoticed
10:03
I see what you did there.
:-)
I saw the last line and had to pause the video. lol
They thought they were slick
I’m confused
Wendy Muir what did they do? I don’t get it
@@somxr_738
***SPOILER***
It was a take on Darth Vader in the first Star Wars movie.
That last story was hilarious!! You go pally!!
My classmate had been bringing alcohol to school for a few days and all the girls in the class were in on it. It should be noted I live in a country where all schools have uniforms and even phones and dating are banned. The teachers finally found out after a few days and all the girls in the class were scolded, a huge scene was made, parents were called, etc.. I, fortunately had decided to stay home that day and my involvement was never revealed.
I feel like some kid that was like "You don't wanna eat my momma's food huh? I'll make sure you ALL get food poisoning!" and put bugs in all their food or sumthin.
Kinda relates. Once I forgot my band binder which has all my sheet music. My scary band director saw a trumpet player without his band binder and this went down,
BD: “TYLER! Where is your music?”
Tyler: “oh I lost it last week”
BD: “ok raise your hand if you have your music.”
Everyone in the room raises their hand except for me. Prepared for the worst
BD: “SEE? EVERYONE has their music!”
Sneak 100
What happened after that? Did they point out you didn’t?
Nah, I survived
There was this abandoned house by a lake we all used to hang out at. One day we all went swimming and just sat around afterwards. I was on my way to get some fast food right before the police showed up. I screamed "run like hell" then got out of there.
My story is, in about 5th or 6th grade once we had a substitute bus driver for a few weeks for some un-known reason, well once she made the mistake to move my cousins friend to another seat, and that's when all hell broke loose. From that day forth for like a week or so, my cousin and her friend would consistently bully/ harass, and overall just be douches to the bus driver. I took part in this too, until like day 2, when I got a gut feeling that I should stop, so I did. For the rest of the week that they would bully her, I just sat in my seat and looked out the window, they didnt even really notice I stopped. Well, good thing I stopped because the when they got to school after the weekend, they were pulled into the office and they got wrote up for distracting/ harassing the bus driver. When we all got home they told their parents and they were bitching to their moms that " they didnt know why THEY got written up and I didnt because I was doing it TOO!". I acted confused too but more or less didnt say much and when my mom and I got home, I told her that I stopped because I felt like I was gonna get in trouble, and I felt bad and she belived me.
(Also yes, my cousin and her friend were the "loud girls", I was to an extent but they went too far and it just wasn't fun anymore.)
Me and 4 of my friends were at a party, but the main party was boring af so we went outside. It was night btw. So with nothing better to do we just started run in across the road because we were 12 year old shites who didn't know better. So after 15 minutes of that and some sort of war we had against my little brother and a traitorous friend... one of us ran across the road right in front of a patrol vehicle. We were fricking screwed. Me and two others ran and the other two just surrendered. The cop Chased one of us and got him, and I didn't know where the other one hid. But I went into the building and hid in a bathroom stall. I waited to what felt like hours before I worked up the courage and went back outside. Only me and one other person who I will call Oliver survived. No one got arrested or fined, my friends just got let off with a stern warning. No parents or anyone even saw it happen which surprised me most. My friends actually thought the officer caught me and sent me to juvie lol
Tl;Dr: did stupid shit, police caught us, I and Oliver got away.
Got out of a severe grade reduction from entering class late when I showed up with a bowl of spaghetti, soaked from the rain, and having grease on my hands. I told the prof "it's been a long day", and he just let it go. That never happens.
Double quote is love
Double quote is life
10:32 I see you, Darth Vader
I wondered if anyone else got that...
The mom that was in the missionary made a great call. Not because of the food poisoning [although, that result was hilarious], it's because she got to eat Mexican food. There is a Latin American community in central Florida and their food is delicious. Not the Tex Mex sort. Real food from scratch and from their homes.
employees at that one Taco Bell: that guy stayed the night in the bathroom, but I don’t get paid enough to care