My husband pays 100% of the bills. I do 100% of the domestic housework and "other" running errands etc.. He does 100% of the "hard" chores and fixes things that break around the house. He does 100% of the protection of all of us, and he has 100% of my attention, love, care, loyalty, and duty to him. Has worked for 26 years.
I love this! My husband and I went from 50/50 to maybe 80/20, so I have a contracted PT job for my church - which I love so much. He pays for everything else. I pay for groceries and some Utilties with my money. And I get allowance and the joy of being a stay at home mom who gets to serve my children, husband, and my church. It works for us, but the most ideal is in the original post - obviously 💕
We both worked for years and all our money went into one account. I let him control the money because he was better at it. Now I'm 60 and he has a better job and he told me he would like me to stay home. ❤
Fact of the matter, no realtionship can be 50/50 100% of the time. Sometimes when your husband brings 40%, you have to bring 60%. When you can only bring 25%, he has to come with that 75%. Its a partnership! You work together to keep the ship moving.
Yup. This is how my husband and I were until I was able to be a stay at home wife. We split bills and whoever had more money after took care of the smaller things
And then the woman divorces the provider man, he ends up in a 1 bedroom apartment, still pays the mortgage, while the woman gets to keep the house. This sounds AMAZING!
THIS. 100%. the feminist. hard working who doesn't need no man. who also chose the bear instead of the man in the woods. the "hate all men" crowd. now demand to be taken care of 100% or else they don't think the man is a true provider or a real man.
@@ostentatiousbeats , I can't respond to anyone, in my own post, because.... who knows why. The overlords deemed me a dangerous individual. Let's see if this one gets deleted/censored/shaddowbanned.
My husband is an art teacher on a humble salary to say the least, so him being a full provider in this economy simply isn't feasible...That said, I know for certain if I lost my job or couldn't pay so and so bills one month, he would absolutely have everything covered; Provider isn't always in the finances, it's in the mentality.
I agree with you. Being in a relationship isn't only about being 50/50. It's coming up with solution for both to perform at 100%. Every couple is different, some earn more, some less. In mine we do a percentage of our salary and not a required amount, cause we are not all equal in what we earn. And if one fall it is ok, because we are fine to be the provider until the other saddles back.
Millennial here. A lot of these comments seem to be from older generations. My spouse and I WANT so desperately to be where he provides for us and I can stay at home wife. But the economy is not this way anymore, if you want a house. Both parties have to work at least one job to contribute to the bills. (Unless you marry someone who makes an absurd amount of money). So, i love these success stories of couples who have been married twenty years traditionally and it’s been great. But it breaks my heart that it’s a reality we can no longer return to.
@ agreed. But it’s so frustrating to me that when I tell my leftie friends I wanna be a trad wife they think I’m crazy and talk about “Womens rights” and how I should be grateful to be able to work. And I’m like “I’m forced to by the economy!” We are one of the first generations where to be middle class we will not have a choice of who works. I will never be able to just stay home and raise children (or have a home for that matter) and I feel just so cheated out of an American dream.
@@brittany6954 No, you're not one of the first generations to have to do that to be Middle class. Thats been the case since the 70s and 80s. That's why Gen X is called the latchkey generation. Both our parents worked full-time and there were no after-school activities or programs. We had our house key on a chain around our neck to let ourselves in the house after school. I didn't work once we had kids even though we were poor. It didn't make financial sense. Anything I made would have just been enough to cover childcare. An extra few dollars a month wasn't going to make much difference. A lot of married women with children are in similar situations. If they'd sit down and take a hard look at their finances, they'd realize most of what they're making is just going to childcare that they wouldn't pay if they didn't work. It's only a couple hundred or so they're contributing per month. Then look at your necessary bills like utilities, mortgage, etc to see how much you NEED a month. Then look at everything else and see if you can eliminate extras to make up what you'll remove if you stop working. If your kids are in school, just working part time during school hours will add more to the household financially than working full-time, too. Allowing you to still mostly be a SAHM. Unless you're making a lot more than your husband or you're both in very specialized fields, most married women can work less than they do if they have children.
Sorry no, I don't accept that. If you wanted that so desperately you'd move to make that work, or take a big loss in lifestyle. You are unwilling to move to an affordable place.
@ boomer I live in a rural area. Like I’m talking crack houses in the neighborhood. Cost of living is also expensive here. Theres no where cheaper to move than besides out of the country and I ain’t giving up my freedom. Also you shouldn’t ask someone to stop being middle class to have traditional values. We literally live pay check to pay check, renting. So yeah, please talk to young people and try to understand our America is different than the one you had at our age.
I feel like the wives that know they don't pay the mortgage and "test" their husband are just trying to brag in front of the women that don't have that benefit 😂
You could be right. I wonder, though, if someone who has never seen that kind of relationship modeled irl may need to see it in a short video just to know it's a real possibility. It's good to have choices, right? There's an incredible amount of security in marrying someone who can support you. The bottom line is that both need to be in agreement.
Many husbands work for the money, and the wife pays the bills with it. So it's not surprising some men would have no idea who the mortgage gets paid to, because they're busy working all the time. I speak from experience.
I also feel the show off bit. Mine and I are too poor for 1 to step all the way back, but instead of each of us paying half of everything each of us takes care of different bills. We've both had to come together and rely on one another to carry the whole load including picking what bill to postpone sometimes. This is a rich folks trend
I totally agree with your comment. Sadly that's in 80% of females M.O they do it all the time weather it be small tests or big tests. Telling someone nothing is wrong when really there is but they want to test you to see if you can pry it out of them. I can keep going, you get the point.
word of advice: Stop posting your relationships online for others to see, they are too lonely and sad. They will just try to blow a minor thing out of proportion and tell the woman to leave the man. It's so wild to me.
I am russian living in Russia with my russian husband. He tells me that I don't have to work because women have other responsibilities in life. For example, I go to the grocery store, cook, clean the house and do all that traditional stuff. And it is considered absolutely normal. I am also a tutor and teach English as a part-time job, but mostly my day is free. I do it because I enjoy it and want to support my husband (just in case). I see a lot of videos online where American people tell about their experience of moving to Russia because they want to have a traditional relationship and a russian wife. Honestly it is a surprise for me. But I was not fully aware of the situation in the US, I guess
@BryceShamwow you know, I think it's all about the economy of countries. I know that many things in the US are quite expensive and it's hard to provide for the whole family alone. For example, I heard that healthcare is very expensive in the US and you actually have to pay the hospital a lot for calling an ambulance and giving birth even. Here it's all free. There are private clinics of course, but we can actually get medical help for free in state hospitals. I've never been to the US and I don't know your side of the story but as far as I heard, it's more difficult to live there, finansial-wise. I'd love to visit though!
@@Safwaan-s7k that's true, propaganda is horrible everywhere! I don't watch our local news, they make us believe that everybody hates us and is our enemy. I personally don't think so, just like many other people, especially young. Mostly older people and babushkas fall for propaganda. For some Russia is truly horrible (and I understand why), for others it is good. For me it's the best place to raise kids for many reasons. I think that our social policy is quite good. I used to live in two other countries and came back here, because I had a chance to compare
Married for 56 years, and husband was the sole provider, but I was the money manager and have always taken care of the bills. He trusted me with most money decisions, and I have been diligent with that trust.
With all these "relationship tests" on Tiktok, these kinds of people will have the nerve (and lack of self-awareness) to wonder why they are still single in 10 years.
This trend wasn't meant to be a test. I've only seen provider ones before watching this video, and it's meant to be a silly gag and that's it. The 50/50 one definitely seemed like a test and should never have been posted though...I feel bad for both the people in that relationship.
50/50 describes a contractual partnership based on an exchange of goods and sevices. 100/100 describes a covenentual marriage based on each giving all of oneself to the other. The first ends in divorce. The second ends in commitment.
Testing your man is playing games ladies. It's a relationship killer. Be honest and upfront. Just some advice from someone who's probably older than most of y'all watching.
But you know that people can lie right? I mean, I am not into filming or posting your partner at all. It"s just that a lot of manipulative partners sometimes lie. Of course if you ask them, they are gonna say they would do everything for you and all that, with words. So for people like that, testing is a way of seeing an actual reaction to a situation, to show the true colors. Then if you do not like the answer, you should make some decision. If you do not trust, not point staying. But at least you open your eyes to that kind of selfish attitude, like it seems to be in the 1st video.
I don't think it's an age thing, I think it's just a general intelligence thing - your view speaks from intelligence while testing a partner doesn't as it really just shows you don't trust your partner - hence why are you still with them.
WRONG. Even Jordan Peterson said that a woman who tests her boyfriend is a SMART woman. Because in marriage that meant to be a whole life, woman have to know is a man that takes responsibility for her and their children is responsible and competent and able to protect and be a worthy example for their son. (capital letters for emphasis, I'm not yelling)
I think it's more than a trend, though. It's the new way of life. A lot of people don't *choose* to be 50/50 with their partner. It's out of necessity.
Uh, no. Social media didn't _cause_ anything, it only showed the nature of ♀ that was already there. Social media = created in 00s, divorces = on the rise since _feminism_ make it make sense.
@@vlo123veronica i don't think we can put a real measure on 50/50 in relationships. women and men are on different wavelengths to begin with, so 50/50 looks different between genders.
And then people act like he has no solutions, but he's asking questions. If a man did this trend to a woman where she was asking questions like that, they'd be lauding her for problem solving. He just doesn't know enough to know what he should or could be asking. Honestly, that clip had "how did you know anything when you just talked to him" energy. She came to him without any options or info.
@@bryanwoods3373 The lass who recorded it explains his response too (see the asterisk at 1:10). He can't see how the story she is telling him makes sense, or why she'd be filming & giggling if the situation is that serious.
@@bryanwoods3373 he's thinking 'what did i get into, wtf do you mean we can't pay rent because you went shopping' he really is rethinking this relationship, look at his face
THIS! Wome don't even realize it's their fault that we can't provide 100%. They wanted to be our equals in the job market and now DEI is hiring women before men. Women have more advantages today in both work and academics than men and are earning more college degrees today than men,... if anything it's time for the men to stay at home and be provided for since women have all the advantages in the work force and higher education.
My husband and I were kind of forced into the provider type relationship. I was working and paying the utilities and groceries while he paid the truck payments and mortgage. Not quite 50/50 but it worked. I was in an accident and broke my neck and back and couldn’t work for a while. He seemed excited and very encouraging for me not to go back to work. The house is clean, food is much healthier and less expensive than eating out or picking it up in my way home, my garden is thriving. I am much happier as well and so is he knowing that he’s taking care of the money and I’m taking care of our home. It just works.
@ thank you! I absolutely did. God had his hand on me for sure. I can’t twerk or shake my butt due to the rods along 5 lower verts but I’m fine with that! Never was my thing 🤣. Thank you for your kindness and I hope things are well with you!
Or, orrrr, we could just stop with all the childish games. If you feel the needs to constantly test your significant other, then the problem lies with you. And you probably weren't ment to be to start with.
My husband and I have both taken turns to support one another through school as well as both working full-time, depending on the season. Our mentality is that it's all "our" money and as long as we work together and support each other in life, we're succeeding. But that is just what works for us, everyone is different.
My girlfriend recently broke up with me because I'm still not economically stable (I'm 23) and because in the future she would expect that I make more than her on a monthly basis and be the main provider, while she gets to keep her money she makes to herself. What you're describing is exactly what I want from a relationship, where we both work and build together and some months one or the other won't be doing as well, so its the responsibility of the other to step up and support during that difficult time
My husband and I contribute 50% paycheck to a shared account but I control our finances. He supported me when I was in school (math major) and I supported him when his job went bankrupt. Hes bluecollar and fixes our house and I tell him what to pay where so we get a new stove from all the cashback this year. We still have our own account but I've done the work to get him from a 400 credit score to 700+ so if I say pay a bill, he works OT and pays it.
@@alabaster3535 That's just a better way to live with a partner in general. Idk why so many men want women to be this way and men are the providers all the time, it makes no sense. A woman and a man should be working and providing for each other. That's how partners work. That's literally the definition of a partner actually. Can't people just live how they want? Regardless of "roles", we're humans not animals. Some things that might work for one won't for other's and this really needs to stop. This is one of the only issues I have with "gender roles". Everyone is different.
Russian women are more traditional and respect their men. American women fought for equality and got it. I don't hear or see Russian women walking around saying they don't need a man.
It is really about good decisions and good leadership. Men are rarely taught about what it means to lead their family anymore. This results in women not being able to settle into their role. Single mother households exacerbate this problem. Stop telling young men to man up and begin teaching them how to lead with masculine compassion and confidence.
Both cultures have very high divorce rates though. I don't know who initiates it over there, but it has become too risky (for men) to marry in the USA given that marriage is no longer an enforceable contract let alone a covenant held--and lived--as a symbol/illustration of the covenant between Christ and His Church. All we see is 304s, some in the open and others waiting to jump Ship which their hypergamy itches. Vows are empty.
@@Erewhon2024 we need to educate young men about hypergamy and female behavior so men can better manage their families. Women have become intolerable due to laws making it advantageous to divorce their husbands. Men need to be educated about ALL of this.
Agreed! I don’t get this mindset at all. I haven’t earned an income, but neither me or my husband would say it’s his income and he pays the bills. We are 1. It’s our income and we together make our family work. So just because I’m home taking care of our kids, the kids are only mine? Of course not. Even the comment section of so called trads are weird. If God forbid my husband can’t work and I bring in an income it would still be ours.. society has lost their mind
I think it boils down to people not having conversations with, and finding compatibility with, either significant other about how to approach creating and maintaining the home. Both should be doing their part with their time, energy and income(s) to prosper. Finding a dynamic that works is great, but how you prepare for and handle situations together when the dynamic doesn't work is what matters most.
The thing that I like about 50/50 relationships is that I don’t like relying on people. Call me paranoid, but one of my biggest fears is getting into a relationship with the perfect partner, and I give them access to my finances (whether that be my work income or their allowance), and then out of no where that perfect person turns into an abusive monster. I’ve read too many stories about that. And because everything in this world is surrounded by money, to control my finances is to control me as a person. If I ever get unlucky enough to find a person who ends up abusive, the idea of having money to get away is reassuring
When in college, we did 50/50. He moved in with me for my safety, as I lived in a dangerous neighborhood. Once I graduated, he had a huge mental health break and i took 100% of the finances while he got back to healthy. Before we had kids, 50/50ish. After kids, i stayed at home. Since then, I now save us childcare costs by work exchange at the kids school. I have the same days off they do, but don't make money. And we love how it is now. Once kids start moving out, I'll go back to working for a paycheck.
That’s what I wanna do work at the school idk where to start I have put in a volunteer app and no call but I want to be at my kids school have days off with them
@jocelynmarin1609 I started long ago, like 9 years? Principal put out an email looking for parents who wanted to help. From there, I was doing after school care, then moved into being an aide.
I appreciate all of the comments stating that its odd to test your spouse like this in the first place. I would not do this to my husband. There are enough worries in life, why fake one to add on to the pile?
@@jackiedoesntcaretesting your relationship is a "joke"? If my partner did that I would be furious!!! What kind of moron would do something like this???
Hi! A comment from Russia here. The men from that video are mostly older gentlemen, plus the interviews are taken in big cities where salaries are much higher. Yes, our culture raises men to be providers, that's true, but in current economic conditions in most couples both people have to work, especially those who are young or live in smaller cities/villages. And we also have guys who are not ready to pay even for the first date, don't trust the impression that every man here will easily spend money on his lady. But good men DO take responsibility and work hard, especially if the family has kids.
Our culture teaches women to be subservient if men "provides". And most of their women still work, but because they may have lower salaries, men are "providers"
@@Ааа-ш5ф3ъ You're right. But in Russia "young" is under 21-22, so yeah. Here if you're old enough to graduate with a bachelor degree means you should have your life together (wich is obviously hella hard and not at all a norm, but is expected from you, especially if you're a man).
That first one seemed to me as though she took charge of paying the bills, even though he also earns the money. As in, that is her responsibility. That’s why he didn’t know who they pay the rent to. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t do his fair share. We don’t know how they split household duties.
Possibly! I don’t work but I am the one that pays our rent/utilities using my husband’s money. I had to take care of my own bills before I met him so I am used to it and actually feel better doing them. My husband has a general idea of how much we spend on bills (we do have a spreadsheet) but he isn’t actively involved and doesn’t need to be as long as I am paying them with the money he provides. It’s a great dynamic for us and could be similar for them (except they probably both work).
Exactly my elderly neighbors always joke around and the wife says that if she was to pass that her husband wouldn't know how to pay the bills or where to even find them. She doesn't work and he makes all the money
Stay-at-home mom here, married 22 years. My husband even takes my car and puts gas in it for me. And I make him his favorite egg sandwich everyday for lunch. A good man and good woman compliment each other. I like that we’re different, but together we make a strong family.
My guy does all of those things for me, too! And we donʻt do the whole 50/50 thing. We are there for each other, and we donʻt disagree on a lot. When we are upset with each other we donʻt give ultimatums. He treats my adult kids like theyʻre his and is respectful to my friends. Idk where the idea itʻs 50/50 or one gotta do the chores and the other pays for everything.
I earned double what my husband earned. So I paid for regular things - rent, groceries, utilities. My husband spent only on personal items like clothing or gifts or vacations... I cooked. He cleaned up afterwards... He did what he could to the best of his ability, and I did what I could to the best of mine... Doesn't make him any less masculine or me any less feminine !!!
@winoodlesnoodles1984 I would like to believe we beat the odds 😉 We have known each other for 12yrs, dated for 8yrs and have had salaries for 6yrs. I used to earn 100% more than him when we started our careers. I still earn 25% more than him. Maybe someday we will be even or he will earn more than me. But honestly, neither of use are worried. We could use all the extra money to travel 😂
I use to be like 50/50. I'm a strong, independent women. I got this. Men need help nowdays. It's just too expensive for him. BUT then I joined the army. And as a female...yeah I need to be spoiled moving forward 😅
A healthy marriage isn't about splitting everything 50/50. It's about both partners giving 100% to the relationship. Finances are a team effort, not a 'yours vs. mine' situation. When couples merge their finances, it's essential to communicate and agree on decisions together. The first video shows the couple had agreed to split their mortgage 50/50, but the woman later reneged. While I wouldn't personally choose a 50/50 financial split, it's clear why the husband felt she should take responsibility for her agreed-upon share. In my view, a healthier approach is: 'What's mine is ours, and what's yours is ours.'
But come on. It can always happen that something goes wrong. He should at least be able to come up with something other than "Will they kick us out?" In a realistic situation, if she went shopping and can't make her share now, there is grounds for anger. That's irresponsible behaviour. But saying nothing other than you don't know how to pay or will they kick us out is ridiculously incompetent... let's say this was due to unforseen medical bills, what would he have done? Shouldn't there be savings sonewhere for emergencies, or somebody that might be willing to loan them part of the rent that's missing and how can they recoop the money? Anything other than "Will they kick us out?" That is a surreal reaction 🤷♀️
@@walle5667 I understand your point, and it's valid to expect more proactive problem-solving. Perhaps his reaction was rooted in feeling overwhelmed or helpless. Still, communication and teamwork are crucial in navigating unexpected setbacks. Ideally, couples should work together to find solutions, like exploring emergency funds or temporary loan options.
In the first video she woke him up and unloaded a big thing on his lap. I (f) know I wouldn’t be able to process the info for another 30 minutes. I am in a provider relationship he earns the money but things have happened where I had to have a job so we didn’t go under. He let me wake up before we discussed options and solutions.
In an IDEAL world, yes, the man would provide financially, and the woman can take care of the kids. But realistically, many families CANNOT do this. Its futile ladies to watch these and compare your relationships. It just causes resentments and arguments. I love my husband, and we are 50/50. He is also disabled, and so there are times when i have to give more energy and time. I see it as God sanctifying me to be more like Jesus. My husband provides for me in other ways too. Comparison is the thief of joy. I'm a big Amala fan, but I disagree with this take.
Same. Wife and I have been married a little over a year and we’re both in our 20s. How the hell am I supposed to provide everything at my age? I don’t make a whole lot..and what we should be doing with all her free time? We don’t have kids yet. Like just makes no sense unless the man is making enough to provide and they have kids
That was the cringe feeling I was having while watching this video. I don't agree on the take of Amala about things "have to be this way". Each relation is different and that balance requires a different approach on each couple. There is no such thing as 50/50, women want this or men have to provide.
I’m 25 and work part time, but my husband pays for 100% of everything. My income goes directly to savings and when we have kids I will stop working. Very content to feel stress free about money. When we were dating and he knew he wanted to marry me, he worked harder and got promoted so that he could make more money because he knew I wanted to be a stay at home mom one day. Ladies, don’t settle
My wife and I did this. The agreement we had going into marriage was to live on my income and save hers for our first house or other big ticket items. It was a bit tighter and we couldn't always get what we wanted, but it worked. When she was going into labor with our first child, she put in for terminal maternity leave and that was it. She has been 100% dedicated to taking care of everything at home for almost 17 years now and it works great. She is also the only reason I have a social life outside of work. She has friends, and they have husbands, so I occasionally get dragged on double dates or to someone's house with the kids.
Heyyy I did this too! Worked full time until we had our first baby, then I switched to part time. When our second child arrived I quit completely. Now we have 3 and I can go back to work when everyone's in school.
I think it’s nuanced and have 3 different responses to each scenario. 1. She wants 50/50? Sure she is contributing half and of course I have a backup plan if she can’t make her way. (Unless she claims “strong independent woman”, then her ass is homeless) 2. She is forced to work due to the economy? We make it work for as long as we have to until it is feasible for us to live my income. But bet, I am looking for a better paying job. 3. She wants to be a full time housewife and mom? I am getting my ass out there and doing everything I can to provide for her and my kids. Unfortunately a lot of women want their cake and to eat it to and to that I say then make them pay half.
My husband is a ups driver and im a stay at home mom. He works long hours for our family so i appreciate his hard work very much. I take care of our two children, clean, cook, shop, laundry, and sometimes yard work. I love my traditional marriage.
You know the value of being traditional, he knows it too but many woman want a traditional man and stay married to the club (outside vibes) many girls want be party girls with a man at home paying bills and if he ever said anything about her actions or clothing she will call him insecure
I am the same way. I got greedy and wanted to have extra spending money so I went back to work and now my kids are being raised by a baby sitter while I put us in thousands in debt where I could've just shut up and been happy with excess luxurious things. I learned my lesson and will be going back to trad wifing it as soon as I pay my debts.
Hello, a girl from Russia is here. (the translator is helping me.) Of course, there are more people who take responsibility and support their wife/girlsfried, paying for everything. There are also those who divide 50/50. But more often I meet those who on "paper are 50/50". But in reality it is one big budget and they help each other. for example, Im working, and my boyfriend stays at home. For some peоple this is surprising and strange. 1 - I want him to find himself. 2 - he gets up before me and prepares food for me. (which I take to work. And every time this is what I would like, my favorite dishes.) 3. he does household chores. 4 - I can rely on him in any matter. 5 - when I didn’t have a job, we lived on his money and there were never any questions. 6 - he has his own small income. So do what makes you comfortable, not others.
You are an exceptional case of reverse dynamic lol 😅. Don't think for a min that is the general norm.. many women will feel miserable and repulsed being permanent income earners/ providers .. just like many Real men will feel miserable being the nurturer full time.
Очень жаль, что многие люди не понимают, что это НИКОГДА не будет 50\50. Партнерство в отношениях не об этом. Иногда ваш партнер должен на 100% вас поддержать, иногда вы его. Иногда от кого-то нужно 75%, или 30%. Суть как раз в том, что вы сказали - нужна возможность положиться на партнера, у обоих должна быть ответственность. У меня похожая ситуация, но, к сожалению, парню приходится платить кредит, поэтому он сейчас тоже работает.
It was very similar with me and my boyfriend for a bit. He couldn’t work, then I couldn’t work. Now we’re both back on our feet, and neither have to work as much. Life is crazy, we do what works for us and makes us happy :) Sometimes we can only bring 25%, sometimes we bring 75%. As long as you’re a team, It works itself out
I'd say about every 5 years we get a new declaration BY WOMEN about what THEY want and what men Should be. I am woman hear me roar. I'm a strong woman and I don't need no man. Men need to be more sensitive. More emotionally intelligent. My money is my money. His money is my money. Happy wife happy life. My body my choice. I didn't make this baby by myself so more child support. You will never see these kids again. These ain't your kids. He's sassy. Men aren't masculine any more. What happened to the time men took control? I'm not your slave or maid!! I can do anything a man can do. I'm not doing that job!!! Divorce. Prenup. Sprinkle sprinkle. Drizzle drizzle. 50/50. No!!! No man would ever ask his woman to go 50/50. Ok, 50/50. Naw, I'm good. Passport. Passport. Loser. Loser.
"every five years i hear a small group of women/leftists say stuff that's regurgitated and twisted in the echo chamber i'm in and it makes me so MAD that i decide to write a bunch of delusional induced nonsense that doesn't actually exist in the context of what general feminism has said but rather the web of lies I use to spin my own crafty little narrative! remember guys, allowing someone a choice ALWAYS means your indoctrinating them into an all or nothing, AM I RIGHT. remember guys, dual income lifestyle was definitely about pushing "strong women" and not providing your kids with a more, fiscally and educationally opportune childhood STAY WITH ME. remember guys, thinking that my husband who willingly made a baby with me should stay in the picture if abortion is banned and i'm forced to keep it is CRAZY. expecting MEN to provide for their CHILD??? disgusting."- you, definitely.
Said it before and I'll say it forever, my wife decides to post something online that intentionally makes me look bad is also her deciding she wants a divorce. I don't put up with blatant disrespect.
Thaaaaank youuuuuu! There are entire Insta accounts of families where the wife basically pretends she runs everything and the husband can barely keep up, and it’s such a poor message for young people watching.
No, what has me reeling is what was said at 1:21. "...I don't know who we pay rent to..." See, I don't know if he's saying that because they live in a house, but you still pay a mortgage once a month. And that goes to the people that manages your mortgage account. How do you not know who those people are?
To be fair, we aren’t going to know if the guy in the first video would’ve gone into solution mode. From his perspective, he was talking to his wife privately and acted calm probably because he got the vibe from his wife (because she was pranking him) that there was no immediate concern. If he knew he was being filmed then he would’ve acted a lot different. In the end, his “trusted” wife secretly filming him for the world to view was probably the worse part of that video.
Agree. But also, she prefaced what she said by "hey, I know we're both about to go to work..." Since we've no other context, I might be willing to give the guy some grace and say maybe he's not a morning person. I'm definitely the opposite of one myself. If someone came to me with a non-adrenaline problem at 5:30 AM, the gears in the brain just aren't going to be turning yet. Give me an hour to wake up and I'll be all over it though.
I'm the same way! I need at least an hour to actually wake up and be a functioning adult. Iget up a lot earlierthan the rest of my familybecause of it. Otherwise I am basically useless for the first portion of my morning!! 😅🤣 Best wishes to you and yours!! To EVERYONE!! May God bless and protect Us ALL!!!💖🙏💖🫶@@TheNCreid
My late husband and I were "50/50" all the time, our entire 14-year relationship. There was never any "scorecard" or any expense tracking. If I came up short, he was there for me; if he came up short, I was there. No questions, no judgment. Why is there suddenly something wrong with people being financially responsible within a relationship and supporting each other?
This is such a refreshing comment to read in this discussion. I disagree with Amala on the notion that a relationship built on traditional gender roles is likely to be healthier than a 50/50 dynamic because I have seen so many "traditional" relationships turn sour, leaving both people trapped in a miserable situation. I'm genuinely happy for anyone who can build a healthy relationship, regardless of their values and relationship dynamics, and I think that we could all benefit from being more open-minded in understanding that it's not black and white - what works for one couple doesn't work for everyone and that's ok.
@@madisonlewis1268 I think what it really boils down to is that people are free to be themselves in the relationship, and they truly like (not just love) each other as they are. I've read a few comments from people saying how exhausting it is to be around people in a 50/50 relationship and how it can never be truly 50/50. I think it's important to realize that it's not about a literal interpretation but rather the goal that you're both contributing to achieve 100% without animosity. It's definitely not something everyone can do.
I live like 50/50, but it didn't stop me from acting like a traditional man, with my wife knowing, eventually she needs to do some traditional wife stuff or she risks to have me upset. In practice she just feels guilty when I suddenly clean whole place solo or cook solo... Because I never let her do that on her own. Kinda exhausting to always be "it must be done" man, but life aren't honey
Men can pay the bills, fix the home, feed the pets, clean the home, cook the food... then get blamed for relaxing 5 minutes and called a complainer for asking for help.
Wait what? Perhaps you mean strictly loyalty tests or stuff of that nature but the whole dating phase is a test... testing for compatibility from mutual values and morals and to evaluate their character
@ If you’re specifically creating situations just to see how someone responses you are a red flag. If the two of you are just going through life together to see if you’re compatible or asking questions upfront like do you want kids cause I do or are you religious that’s another story.
We've been married 35 years. We both work. We share the bills. We have three accounts: hers, mine, joint. We split household responsibilities BECAUSE WE'RE ADULTS. If one of us came up short, its a conversation and we find a solution. People, please stop playing these silly games with each other.
I was a stay at home mom with our 4 children including a new born. He was military and deployed a fair bit. We did good. Until we didn't. He decided to abandon me and our 4 children 1 night. Paid child support, less than $200, for a couple of years then left the state and had no further contact with his children. I went to nursing school to support my children and myself. Not a fun part of my life. Not an easy time. I was scared, tired and at the end of my rope. But I had no choice. I had to keep going. There were many nights going to work that I thought seriously about flooring it and driving into a pine tree. But I couldn't because of my kids. They had no one else. That was 30 years ago. The kids are grown and doing great on their own now and I'm a happy grandma 🎉❤.
I'm so sorry. Women often have to be the strong ones, for their kids. I wish you'd had the man you deserved, but at least your kids had the parent they needed.
What I'm trying to say, is you never know what life is going to hand you. My husband left me high and dry. But it could have been that he died. Sure there's insurance. But that won't sustain a family for the rest of their life. A woman has to be prepared in case of the worst scenario. She has to be able to provide for herself and her children. I have nothing against a stay at home mom. I just advise that she educate herself just in case. My story is far from a rare occurrence unfortunately.
I don't understand why any working woman would complain about contributing to household finances. The whole 50/50 concept shouldn't even be a thing. Especially in relationships where the female partner makes just as much money, or more, than her husband. Modern women wanted to earn more, so take the responsibility of paying some bills. It's only fair. I am willing to bet that this is not an issue in same sex relationships.
At the same time, you are obliged to raise children, because most often men believe that this is a 'woman's responsibility'. So don't rush to book your tickets)
Well, this was to be expected. The current economy does not allow for this type of arrangement in common reports. Only those who have money or have inherited something have this freedom demonstrated on social media.
In the same way, many men ask for children and then abandon them without coping with the responsibility, and the woman pulls everything on herself alone!
Yeah, I didn't believe the russian guys in the video. Women in eastern europe were never just housewives like in the west, they were expected to be on the fields and factories alongside men. And usually one paycheck wouldn't be enough to support a family anyway
50/50 is when you and your husband/Wife/partner both contribute what they can...we all have our strenghths and power shifts due to a variety of factors and circumstances.
Forget 50/50. I bring 100% effort and you bring 100% effort. Granted you may have off days but were only human. Bring 100% of what you can that day. Figure out who is doing what roles and covering what. Just do your part.
And if these 100% are lacking through course of the years? 100/100 is exactly equal to 50/50, when you catch the feeling of other party slacking, you'll remember quick that thing you demanded to "forget" Ironic
That first guy- I don't know. He seemed like he just woke up. That's kind of unfair to judge him so harshly, we have no context other than that disrespectful lady came up and lied about her finances and she didn't even have a good excuse she just says "yeah, I spent it on holiday stuff" Like what?! I'd be like yeah so, I'm not sure what we're gonna do about rent, but I'll figure it out and then after we are going to have to talk about your financial choices so this doesn't become a regular thing.
The man on the couch at the 3:30 mark, probably knew she was acting strange, and was wondering "what is she up to now?" The mindset of people doing what she is doing has a pattern of this behavior. She has probably done things like this before, and he probably knows she is recording it, at one point she even zooms.
Not only that she says "before we go to work" it's probably the morning too or just after he got up. That man is tired and now his girl is in his face with some bs hypothetical
We were 50/50 when we first got married. Then I started grinding my teeth at night with the bills. So my husband started paying the bills with my checks and his. Then he got sick with an auto autoimmune disease and couldn't work after about 3 years into the marriage. He still payed the bills with my money and I didn't have to grind my teeth at night. He has passed on after 23 years of marriage, and I pay all the bills now. It drives me crazy that bills come in at all diffrent times. I wish he was still here to pay the bills so I don't have to worry.
@BrianDiCiacco Thank you! We did have an amazing marriage. I wished it would have been 50 years or more. But we married "late". I was 29, and he was 34. It was a great 23 years. Thank you again.
if you call up customer service and are extra nice in your tone, oftentimes they will work with you to adjust the bill due dates to as close as possible to your preferred week or day.
If that was the case one way to work it out would be to take back the Christmas gifts you bought and use the money to pay your bills. My family has had a number of years where Christmas has had to be less than what I wanted to do because the money simply wasn’t there. It’s okay to not spend a lot, don’t let pride get in the way of taking care of your mortgage/rent FIRST and doing a smaller amount for gifts.
This topic dovetails with divorce laws. Those Russian men don't live where they get hammered in divorce, no matter what. Their attitudes are different for many reasons than just who pays the bills. We need to look at the bigger picture here and solve the issues in the system.
The divorce court in Russia is just as bad as in certain U.S. states, plus the judge can through the prenup out of the window if one side (almost always women) assumes there's "injustice" in it. Our family laws produce as much fatherless children as the U.S. laws do if not more.
It is dangerous for women (or men or anyone) to depend financially on others. You need to know how to pay your bills & be financially responsible. I'm not saying traditional dynamics are bad, but there is an underlying threat dependents blissfully ignore. People die. Jobs aren't forever. The economy can tank. Also, you can have a common account and pay bills from there. It doesn't have to be 50-50, you can have your own flow, but know how to pay the bills, how to save money & how to plan ahead. You are two adults. Life spares no one. Be responsible. You are teamplayers, keeping the ship afloat together.
And in a lot of cases where men provide 100%, the women end up feeling trapped in the relationship and don’t have the means to support themselves financially or escape an abusive situation. It gives some women comfort to know they can also provide for themselves and aren’t completely dependent on someone else. You can’t generalize relationships, and 50/50 is not necessarily a bad thing if it works well and both partners respect each other and are willing to problem solve and support one another in a pinch.
That’s very accurate. Whilst I despair that the powers that be have worked to destroy traditional roles and break up the family unit, I don’t think returning to what was in totality is the solution. Less programming, more individual solutions.
Most of the women today who say they want a provider just want a sugar daddy not a traditional relationship. It’s disgusting to put that on men in the current climate imo
The problem with the 50/50 comparison vs 100% responses is that they are only seeing the answers of the 50/50 crowd from a monetary standpoint. A relationship IS and has ALWAYS been 50/50... If a man provides the money and a woman takes care of the household and kids. That IS 50/50! Being a housewife is HARD and is a big job. And if you aren't a housewife or both work, always make sure there is a 50/50 dynamic in terms of value to the relationship. It's not all about money, but it's all about supporting and balancing each other for a healthy household.
Biggest failure is recognizing the MAN as part of the household needing her care. Most women won't lift a finger for his needs, while expectation is he never fails in his delivery. It is not in kind reciprocal effort he looks for, and society turns a blind eye to holding a woman to any expectations of return.
Going on 30 years with my hubs. He’s always been the main provider, but we’ve always shared our bills and money. I’ve stayed at home with the kids and I’ve worked when I wanted to or when we needed some extra money. Now, we’re business partners. If you want a successful relationship, you need to be all in. The pastor who married us told us it should never be 50-50, but 100% effort from both partners, no matter which roles you choose to take on.
My parents are retiring, and my mom has just realized she has no idea how to pay the bills or do taxes. She wants to learn (teacher retirement includes funeral benefits, so that freaked her out). My older brother learned how to pay all of the bills in a foreign country in a language he didn't know in order to pay for his wife and children who are natives. My oldest brother's wife happens to make a lot more money than him, so they live 50-50, because she didn't want to wait longer for a house with a yard. It wasn't my brother being unwilling to pay for everything, it was him understanding what she wanted and being willing to put his pride aside to support her in making her goals his goals as well. He knows how to do all of the bills and frequently uses his pay to arrange for contractors for home improvements as his way of trying to make it up to her.
I think it’s weird to test your relationship on the internet, or in general ngl. One thing to chat with one another in private but like relationships are kinda meant to be private, just me or?
Bruh... no... not a chance... ive always tried to make sure i have at least a full months rent in my emergency savings... anyone trying this crap ever, they need to be kicked out IMMEDIATELY!!! None of these women deserve husbands if they test their man like this... beyond toxic
U took the word right out my mouth all this is showing how irresponsible those women are .horrible money management I don't get how people are fawning over this
The issue with 50/50 is that a lot of men expect the 50% of the wages and 80-100% of the domestic labour. Unfortunately, with the state of the world most people can't survive on one wage. I myself work full time a demanding nursing job. I fully expect my partner to take care of me when I get home, likewise I take care of him. However, even if the economic situation was better, I still think that both parties should have financial freedom. While some relationships work out, a lot of time you see abuse in many of them. I would never want to be dependent on someone.
That's how my husband and I do it. His money is our money and covers bills, etcetera, my money is my money. But usually I use it for "fun" money for us and our kids, like drinks, fast food, date nights, things like that that aren't necessary. But if he's ever short for whatever reason my money rolls into bills. It works for us
My husband brings in most of the money; I pay the bills out of our joint account. We're a couple, not two singles. Women have been the CFOs of families for centuries; men provided the income, women provided the management--because she was managing the household. This idea that women shouldn't be involved in the finances is ridiculous.
Yes. This used to be understood not to long ago. Men make the bacon, and women cooked it, and made sure it got used accordingly. It was always this way. It used to be considered important until the feminists convinced society it was akin to slavery. It’s shocking that people forget this when feeding your family was a part of the bedrock of a good home. It is to be looked at with respect, not disgust. Glad some women are still around that get that. Motherly deeds are greatly appreciated by the children, and making sure that bills get paid is not forgotten.
When we were working, we used my husband’s check to pay the bills since he got paid once a month and I bought the groceries, put gas in our vehicles, and paid for our fun stuff like camping. Now that we are retired, we still use his check for bills, the monthly groceries. We both get Social Security and mine isn’t much, but that is used for prescriptions, eating out, c and medical expenses. At one time before our son started school, he worked three jobs so I could be at home with our son.
I got an insane true up bill in California in September. I was venting to my boyfriend how stupid it was and wondering who thought it was a good idea to charge a years worth of power to someone on one month’s bill to be paid by the next month. I’m not even kidding, the bill was literally almost 4k. I was talking and venting and we switched subjects. We were on a walk at the time so when we got home, he ran to his little stash that he has and came straight to me and handed me 3k. I was shocked at first and told him I wasn’t complaining so he would give me money. He said that doesn’t matter and that he wants to help. No questions asked, he didn’t try and guilt me into not taking it. I actually tried to refuse and he wouldn’t let me. The man parted with 3 racks like he was offering me a jolly rancher.
@@earonjaena9273Or just an idiot. Handing over that kind of cash is either well thought out, or straight up ignorant. Most likely ignorant. Chances are they don’t make it, and spending that much on a woman you won’t be with down the road takes away from your future wife, and family.
And some women aren’t pretty enough to be with a man who owns a home and wants his wife to have the option to stay home. Life isn’t fair but nothing wrong with having a chuckle at reality.
No. More of these videos are needed. There’s so much content from men shaming “modern women” (women who can’t bake bread all day because they have to provide for their families at their “girl boss feminist” jobs) it’s nice for once to flip the tables and let “modern men” feel how they have made “modern women” feel. I don’t see the problem. But I guess it ain’t fun when the rabbit has the gun.
Some women aren’t pretty enough for a man who owns a home and wants a stay at home wife? Hahaha those men actually pay for their wives to maintain their appearance, dusties don’t.
@@mimia.4810 women aren't getting shamed because they don't bake bread all day, they get shamed because they have 300+ bodycount and can't even cook spaghetti and still expect a loyal rich 6ft man. It's also not men who are addicted to tiktok relationship drama.
@@mimia.4810why do you like watching people bash each other? Thats pretty sadistic honestly. If you want to watch women bash men or men bash women you’re a bit strange
Most of us men don't mind paying for everything. The problem is that nowadays women at the start are like "I don't care about actually getting to know you or loving you for you, pay for everything, also how much money do you make?👀"
I’d even say you can be a “broke” guy and still be a provider. My boyfriend for example didn’t have a lot of money when we first got together. That didn’t stop him from giving away what he did have to those who needed it. Just seeing him living a “poor” life yet always happy to share and give away what someone else might need more has shown that he is definitely a provider. I’d hope that for other women out there too, that they try to find a man with a big heart, not necessarily a big wallet.
Maybe you are an exception, but the problem is a lot of men that talk about 'paying everything' have only that going on. 'I am Mr. Big Alpha, Imma pay everything, what do you bring to the table?' Like ok sir, i'll cook and clean but since your one defining trait is your providing status, provide. Don't get me wrong, both sides in this are selfish, that's why i'm not a big fan of 'trad' life, but again, i understand it could be demographics etc. if amala is meeting good 'trad' men good for her. im only meeting men who think money will buy everything
And most women now a days come with an “already made family”. I’m a that doesn’t have a kid of his own and never wanted them but majority of the women that come to me have a ready made family
@@jfull1989 my assumption is demographics. Where you live and your age. Both men and women need to face reality. When you are older people have a lived life and baggage. Don't complain you can't find someone if you were picky in your youth. Either be content single or work hard and find someone you love without complaint. Again. For both men and women. The whole gender war is stupid. No one is entitled to a relationship
Absolutely not! This is what women fought for and deserve. Women have more advantages in the workforce and higher education today so they should have no problem paying 50% of everything.
Nope, my ex was terrible with finances, so we kept them separate. He'd say I deposited about X amount in the account or forget to tell me of a check he wrote.
@@CrimsonEclipse it's about keep your dirty laundry indoors. Test by itself aren't that ridiculous as the phone she holds to capture that. In case where you didn't know who you pay rent to, because you never actually do that yourself - it's furious to know you let another "smart" woman to know and complain out there how irresponsible you are It's common sense that people aren't fun of being judged for free
I can afford to support my wife and our five kids because I have a job making 80k a year and we live modestly. I went to college and have a state licensed job with my degree. I want a PS5. I'll be working overtime at some point to get it. We do a lot of free activities. Hiking, parks, libraries. We have a home gym rather than a gym membership, which has saved us a lot of money in the long run. We watch movies at home rather than at the theater. None of us wear designer or high-end rack (Gap, American Eagle, etc.) unless we get gifts or Christmas money. We almost always eat home cooked meals. And that doesn't have to be blah. Just the other day, I taught myself to make marsala sauce from a recipe when my wife didn't feel well. We had that with sauteed onions, pasta, and meatballs for dinner. Whole meal probably cost 12-15 dollars for seven people, and we still have leftovers. And my wife hasn't stopped talking about how much she liked it. We don't replace our cars when they're paid off. We make them last their entire lives. I've been driving the same car for twelve years. My wife's been driving our van for seven years, now. I've saved enough money by keeping my car to buy my next car outright if the automobile market remains stable. I do my own car work when I can. That includes oil changes. We don't have every streaming service. It's cheaper in the long run to buy on sale what you know you want to watch, and rent it if you aren't sure.
I gave up on dating years ago. That said, when I was in my 20s, I thought I wanted a 50-50 relationship. Now that I’m older, I would love to just have a partner. If he wants to take care of me, more power to him! I’d love to be able to help take care of him too.
I don't get the "your money/my money" thing in marriages. I mean if it works for you that's fine. I just don't get it personally. We have "our money" and we trust that neither of us is going to be stupid with it. Frivolous purchases of more than like 20 dollars are discussed.
It's coherent with the "happy wife/happy life" that tradition always had but clearly that doesn't work with the high divorce rates where women initiate it 70% or around that percentage.
@@suzusuzu896 'Happy wife/happy life' is a modern, gynocentric concept that places the husband in a weak/subservient role where he must cater to and prioritize his wife's needs and desires (over his own) in order to keep her happy. The traditional concept was 'good wife/good life' which is about women being held accountable for their behavior; it also serves as a warning to men that bad/low quality women destroy peaceful homes and bring suffering to their families. BIG difference!
exactly, that's how I've always pictured it too. I find it so weird when I hear married couples say things like "I pay for this, my husband pays for that", "we pay 50/50" or "my husband gave me money" etc, it's like being married but still living like you're single or college roommates or something
From what I’ve seen lately a lot of woman aren’t trained to be stay at home, and if they are stay at home they don’t really bring anything to the table. The guy will go to work and then still have to cook and clean while the girl ended up doing a few small chores and and pretending that they are still in high school. At that point I’d rather have them working to help out with the finances so you aren’t stuck doing everything for yourself and a dependent. We’d all love for the traditional way of life but it seems like the skills aren’t getting passed down
I listened to this while making my amazing husband his lunch for work tomorrow, including a delicious apple crisp I baked because I know my family loves those. In the morning I help the kids make their lunch if they are running late. I then go to work for 6 hours, because my husband has always put our children first. I was home with them for 7 years. Once they were both in school I started working on a school to be on their schedule. Now 8 years later, I'm still at that school and I still enjoy working my 6 hour school schedule. Our children are now older (nearly 15 and 13), they need us much less than when they were little. But I still work a job that allows me to be a present mom because that is important to us as parents. Yes the pay sucks. But our children are only with us for a short time before they are grown and off living their own lives. I will forever be thankful to my husband for being our main provider, and for always taking on more for his family. Because of that I will always take on more with juggling the kids schedule, appointments, cleaning, cooking, bill paying, etc. Love our more traditional roles!
@areyoudoingthisright I like my current husband. But I do joke about taking on another husband to help pay bills, and another wife to do the cleaning. Then my husband and I can just travel more 🤣
Что ты имеешь ввиду когда говоришь слово "лидировать"? Я могу понять другое слово. Если женщина становиться домохозяйкой и остаётся дома с детьми, понятное дело, что мужчина должен зарабатывать деньги иначе на что они будут жить.
It's not that I don't want to have a traditional relationship, it just seems impossible. I'm 30 and disabled. There's no hope for a career where I can make enough to support myself, and there's no hope of ever finding a woman to be in a relationship with.
Im a man in my 20s, and my wife and i have been together for 6 years. Our financial situation at the beginning was me about 85%. When covid hit, my wife was able to get a job that paid more, and expenses went up, and it became like 60% me. Now i make more, and it's up to 75%, and we have kids. I would eventually like to move to 100%, but my wife said she wants to contribute some, so im guessing it'd be closer to 95%. That being said, i think that if im paying for almost everything, my wife should be holding it down at home, which she agrees with me. I can see were a lot of guys are coming from with the whats in it for me aspect because a lot of women that want her man to be in charge of finance also dont want to do household tasks, and pretty much want a dad for a husband. It's kind of sad to see a lack of maturity from both men and women in this aspect (and overall, to be honest)
"I just created a problem from my own sh*tty behavior, and I am now angry that you didn't urgently respond to my fictitious emergency" - way too many women
Chicken or egg dynamic: an absolutely massive number of American women have an outright disdain and disrespect for men. Obviously not all, but enough that it's absolutely poisoned the relationship culture. It's unreasonable for women to expect a provider relationship from someone who they hold no respect for, so it's not surprising that men's outlook on this has soured. By the same token, does the lack of the provider mentality just serve to further this disrespect? I can't say which came first, but both mentalities are leading us on a downward spiral.
That lack of respect is due to social media giving women the illusion of infinite choices. Most of them will be like "Oh, you don't want to buy me something or provide? I'll just hit up john from LA, who slid in my DMs months ago and replace you."
Ehhh some of the push for 50/50 isn’t lack of masculinity. Granted, I can see the debate with the first guy, but some of it is straight defensiveness over divorce rates in the US and what usually happens to the men in those situations. Not every guy goes that route(obv from the video) but enough men grew up watching their parents or their friend’s parents go through viscous divorces and in 80%+ of the cases, the wife totally screwed the guy. The celebrity divorces where these women get like $50,000 a month in alimony isn’t helping the optics either.
There is no debate with the first guy though. She said she mishandled money like an immature child. Why is it expected in this day and age, and this economy. That he would just have the money. I’m not reassuring my wife/girlfriend that everything will be fine, when there would be no problem if they acted like an adult to begin with. Lastly, she could literally just return the gifts, and get back her share of the rent. Don’t excuse childish behavior in women. They thrive on that toxic crap.
My husband pays 100% of the bills. I do 100% of the domestic housework and "other" running errands etc.. He does 100% of the "hard" chores and fixes things that break around the house. He does 100% of the protection of all of us, and he has 100% of my attention, love, care, loyalty, and duty to him. Has worked for 26 years.
Ditto. I worked off and on but he always pays the bills. Nothing wrong with that. Every couple is different. We’ve been married 25 years 😊
25 years here and that's our relationship as well 🥰
I love this! My husband and I went from 50/50 to maybe 80/20, so I have a contracted PT job for my church - which I love so much. He pays for everything else. I pay for groceries and some Utilties with my money. And I get allowance and the joy of being a stay at home mom who gets to serve my children, husband, and my church.
It works for us, but the most ideal is in the original post - obviously 💕
same!!
We both worked for years and all our money went into one account. I let him control the money because he was better at it. Now I'm 60 and he has a better job and he told me he would like me to stay home. ❤
Fact of the matter, no realtionship can be 50/50 100% of the time. Sometimes when your husband brings 40%, you have to bring 60%. When you can only bring 25%, he has to come with that 75%. Its a partnership! You work together to keep the ship moving.
Yep. I know a 50/50 couple and honestly they're exhausting. They're constantly tallying what the other person does.
@@annapainter2763and that tallying eventually leads to resentment that's builds up over time and it's never healthy unfortunately
@@annapainter2763this exactly.
Yup. This is how my husband and I were until I was able to be a stay at home wife. We split bills and whoever had more money after took care of the smaller things
I'm glad you have that option
First off, bills get paid first before anything else. The next thing is that testing a relationship is like wrecking a car to see if the airbag works.
no , certain countries have trains , cars are ore safe, depends
Thanks for that excellent comment 😅
i don't get the mentality of let's spend money before we pay off credit card balances or student loans. it's like home planning 101.
@@pabstdrank Yep. It may survive but you won’t like what’s left.
And then the woman divorces the provider man, he ends up in a 1 bedroom apartment, still pays the mortgage, while the woman gets to keep the house. This sounds AMAZING!
I think the difference is most American woman say they want to be independent but at the same time want to be taken care of
THIS. 100%. the feminist. hard working who doesn't need no man. who also chose the bear instead of the man in the woods. the "hate all men" crowd. now demand to be taken care of 100% or else they don't think the man is a true provider or a real man.
if i could afford to be 100% to cover my family i would. but really in this world and economy we can't
Did you see the same video the rest of us just watched? Did you miss the part where the men are saying it, not the women?
@@OlgaRykovyou completely missed the point
I think men are the same. Everyone wants independence, but also to know that their partner will take care of them whenever and however they can.
Just doing this trend, and posting it on the internet, is grounds for relationship cancellation.
I couldn't be with someone who always had a camera in my face.
All these trends are just toxic.
@@lynnw7155 , yeah, I would put an end to that immediately.
Facts, some women don't see how publicly embarrassing your man is a shitty thing to do. Something tells me they also cheat
@@ostentatiousbeats , I can't respond to anyone, in my own post, because.... who knows why. The overlords deemed me a dangerous individual. Let's see if this one gets deleted/censored/shaddowbanned.
Elephant in the room: Why are you videoing a private matter and posting it?
Women.
⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️
It's all staged man. None of these videos are genuine. It's just the content machine.
Bro if the camera stays still and is perfectly framed. They're staged 😂
So we can all study them
My husband is an art teacher on a humble salary to say the least, so him being a full provider in this economy simply isn't feasible...That said, I know for certain if I lost my job or couldn't pay so and so bills one month, he would absolutely have everything covered; Provider isn't always in the finances, it's in the mentality.
Would you do the same if the rolls were reverse
Period!
I always liked the philosophy that it is not 50/50 but both people giving 💯 . (Or maybe realistically 80%😉)
@@puttinontheritzcrackers3301 love that!
I agree with you. Being in a relationship isn't only about being 50/50. It's coming up with solution for both to perform at 100%. Every couple is different, some earn more, some less. In mine we do a percentage of our salary and not a required amount, cause we are not all equal in what we earn. And if one fall it is ok, because we are fine to be the provider until the other saddles back.
Millennial here. A lot of these comments seem to be from older generations. My spouse and I WANT so desperately to be where he provides for us and I can stay at home wife. But the economy is not this way anymore, if you want a house. Both parties have to work at least one job to contribute to the bills. (Unless you marry someone who makes an absurd amount of money). So, i love these success stories of couples who have been married twenty years traditionally and it’s been great. But it breaks my heart that it’s a reality we can no longer return to.
Same boat. It's always fun trying to explain to older folks that we're one of the few generations who will be poorer than our fathers
@ agreed. But it’s so frustrating to me that when I tell my leftie friends I wanna be a trad wife they think I’m crazy and talk about “Womens rights” and how I should be grateful to be able to work. And I’m like “I’m forced to by the economy!” We are one of the first generations where to be middle class we will not have a choice of who works. I will never be able to just stay home and raise children (or have a home for that matter) and I feel just so cheated out of an American dream.
@@brittany6954 No, you're not one of the first generations to have to do that to be Middle class. Thats been the case since the 70s and 80s. That's why Gen X is called the latchkey generation. Both our parents worked full-time and there were no after-school activities or programs. We had our house key on a chain around our neck to let ourselves in the house after school. I didn't work once we had kids even though we were poor. It didn't make financial sense. Anything I made would have just been enough to cover childcare. An extra few dollars a month wasn't going to make much difference. A lot of married women with children are in similar situations. If they'd sit down and take a hard look at their finances, they'd realize most of what they're making is just going to childcare that they wouldn't pay if they didn't work. It's only a couple hundred or so they're contributing per month. Then look at your necessary bills like utilities, mortgage, etc to see how much you NEED a month. Then look at everything else and see if you can eliminate extras to make up what you'll remove if you stop working. If your kids are in school, just working part time during school hours will add more to the household financially than working full-time, too. Allowing you to still mostly be a SAHM. Unless you're making a lot more than your husband or you're both in very specialized fields, most married women can work less than they do if they have children.
Sorry no, I don't accept that. If you wanted that so desperately you'd move to make that work, or take a big loss in lifestyle. You are unwilling to move to an affordable place.
@ boomer I live in a rural area. Like I’m talking crack houses in the neighborhood. Cost of living is also expensive here. Theres no where cheaper to move than besides out of the country and I ain’t giving up my freedom. Also you shouldn’t ask someone to stop being middle class to have traditional values. We literally live pay check to pay check, renting. So yeah, please talk to young people and try to understand our America is different than the one you had at our age.
I feel like the wives that know they don't pay the mortgage and "test" their husband are just trying to brag in front of the women that don't have that benefit 😂
You could be right. I wonder, though, if someone who has never seen that kind of relationship modeled irl may need to see it in a short video just to know it's a real possibility. It's good to have choices, right? There's an incredible amount of security in marrying someone who can support you. The bottom line is that both need to be in agreement.
Many husbands work for the money, and the wife pays the bills with it. So it's not surprising some men would have no idea who the mortgage gets paid to, because they're busy working all the time. I speak from experience.
@@jeffmeyers3837 Yeah, I know, but that's not really the point. I think this trend is just to show off from their part.
I also feel the show off bit. Mine and I are too poor for 1 to step all the way back, but instead of each of us paying half of everything each of us takes care of different bills. We've both had to come together and rely on one another to carry the whole load including picking what bill to postpone sometimes. This is a rich folks trend
Agreed
If you attempt a relationship test you’re the one who lost, no matter what the man does
No matter who is doing the testing and recording it for a reaction is already setting themselves up for nothing good.
I totally agree with your comment. Sadly that's in 80% of females M.O they do it all the time weather it be small tests or big tests. Telling someone nothing is wrong when really there is but they want to test you to see if you can pry it out of them. I can keep going, you get the point.
bingo, you test me and I will tell you to kick rocks, lol
@@evrettejкак ты даже примерно можешь знать процент, если многие люди могут это не записывать на видео и даже могут не сказать это своему партнёру?
The men in the videos seemed secure enough with themselves to let it go.
Playing games instead of being upfront and honest is a big red flag.
Putting your personal life online is a bigger red flag
It's not game, it's a test. Games are fun.
this shouldn't even be a test, if I'm living with someone ima know they've got my back and I've got theirs in these situations
word of advice: Stop posting your relationships online for others to see, they are too lonely and sad. They will just try to blow a minor thing out of proportion and tell the woman to leave the man. It's so wild to me.
I am russian living in Russia with my russian husband. He tells me that I don't have to work because women have other responsibilities in life. For example, I go to the grocery store, cook, clean the house and do all that traditional stuff. And it is considered absolutely normal. I am also a tutor and teach English as a part-time job, but mostly my day is free. I do it because I enjoy it and want to support my husband (just in case).
I see a lot of videos online where American people tell about their experience of moving to Russia because they want to have a traditional relationship and a russian wife. Honestly it is a surprise for me. But I was not fully aware of the situation in the US, I guess
You get it: it's horrific over here.
@BryceShamwow you know, I think it's all about the economy of countries. I know that many things in the US are quite expensive and it's hard to provide for the whole family alone. For example, I heard that healthcare is very expensive in the US and you actually have to pay the hospital a lot for calling an ambulance and giving birth even. Here it's all free. There are private clinics of course, but we can actually get medical help for free in state hospitals. I've never been to the US and I don't know your side of the story but as far as I heard, it's more difficult to live there, finansial-wise. I'd love to visit though!
@sia_eng Yes, healthcare is very expensive, even if you have insurance. It's absolutely insane.
@@sia_engis Russia as bad as our media will have you believe? It’s hard to know how much is truth and how much is propaganda.
@@Safwaan-s7k that's true, propaganda is horrible everywhere! I don't watch our local news, they make us believe that everybody hates us and is our enemy. I personally don't think so, just like many other people, especially young. Mostly older people and babushkas fall for propaganda. For some Russia is truly horrible (and I understand why), for others it is good. For me it's the best place to raise kids for many reasons. I think that our social policy is quite good. I used to live in two other countries and came back here, because I had a chance to compare
Married for 56 years, and husband was the sole provider, but I was the money manager and have always taken care of the bills. He trusted me with most money decisions, and I have been diligent with that trust.
@galleygalva.546 times have changed in 56 years mam
my parents did things this way when i tried i had to take over the bills because she was not trustworthy
❤❤❤❤
That's how my mom and stepdad are and sort of how I was in my last marriage.
That is good, to always be like that.
With all these "relationship tests" on Tiktok, these kinds of people will have the nerve (and lack of self-awareness) to wonder why they are still single in 10 years.
Still single? They are married with kids and a mortgage…they’re fine. Sound like projection
Not me
I'm single because i care about my life
This trend wasn't meant to be a test. I've only seen provider ones before watching this video, and it's meant to be a silly gag and that's it. The 50/50 one definitely seemed like a test and should never have been posted though...I feel bad for both the people in that relationship.
@@Cheeto848 by doing all these tests you just sabbotage your relationship
@@Cheeto848And divorced in 5 years
50/50 describes a contractual partnership based on an exchange of goods and sevices.
100/100 describes a covenentual marriage based on each giving all of oneself to the other.
The first ends in divorce.
The second ends in commitment.
Testing your man is playing games ladies. It's a relationship killer. Be honest and upfront. Just some advice from someone who's probably older than most of y'all watching.
Fr especially if I know she doesn't pay, it's like fishing for an argument.
But you know that people can lie right? I mean, I am not into filming or posting your partner at all. It"s just that a lot of manipulative partners sometimes lie. Of course if you ask them, they are gonna say they would do everything for you and all that, with words. So for people like that, testing is a way of seeing an actual reaction to a situation, to show the true colors. Then if you do not like the answer, you should make some decision. If you do not trust, not point staying. But at least you open your eyes to that kind of selfish attitude, like it seems to be in the 1st video.
Especially publicly online like that.
I don't think it's an age thing, I think it's just a general intelligence thing - your view speaks from intelligence while testing a partner doesn't as it really just shows you don't trust your partner - hence why are you still with them.
WRONG. Even Jordan Peterson said that a woman who tests her boyfriend is a SMART woman. Because in marriage that meant to be a whole life, woman have to know is a man that takes responsibility for her and their children is responsible and competent and able to protect and be a worthy example for their son.
(capital letters for emphasis, I'm not yelling)
Society has fallen hard. Social Media has become a problem for everyday life and causes alot of divorces.
Drizzle drizzle
I think it's more than a trend, though. It's the new way of life. A lot of people don't *choose* to be 50/50 with their partner. It's out of necessity.
You're correct, it is more than a trend. It is very much like OP stated. Society is valueless, nowadays.
Uh, no.
Social media didn't _cause_ anything, it only showed the nature of ♀ that was already there.
Social media = created in 00s, divorces = on the rise since _feminism_
make it make sense.
@@vlo123veronica i don't think we can put a real measure on 50/50 in relationships. women and men are on different wavelengths to begin with, so 50/50 looks different between genders.
Why would someone do this. Not to mention she has a phone out, he clearly is waiting for the punch line. This is toxic and gross.
And then people act like he has no solutions, but he's asking questions. If a man did this trend to a woman where she was asking questions like that, they'd be lauding her for problem solving. He just doesn't know enough to know what he should or could be asking. Honestly, that clip had "how did you know anything when you just talked to him" energy. She came to him without any options or info.
Because it's exactly what we have always known, and what _they_ prove themselves to be everyday of their existence...
♀ are *children*
@@bryanwoods3373 The lass who recorded it explains his response too (see the asterisk at 1:10).
He can't see how the story she is telling him makes sense, or why she'd be filming & giggling if the situation is that serious.
@@bryanwoods3373 he's thinking 'what did i get into, wtf do you mean we can't pay rent because you went shopping' he really is rethinking this relationship, look at his face
🎯. If she spent the rent on Xmas gifts, she has to return that 💩
Feminism: We are strong-independent-and don’t need no men to take care of us!
Women: I want men to provide and figure it all out.
Men: WE GIVE UP!
THIS! Wome don't even realize it's their fault that we can't provide 100%. They wanted to be our equals in the job market and now DEI is hiring women before men. Women have more advantages today in both work and academics than men and are earning more college degrees today than men,... if anything it's time for the men to stay at home and be provided for since women have all the advantages in the work force and higher education.
My husband and I were kind of forced into the provider type relationship. I was working and paying the utilities and groceries while he paid the truck payments and mortgage. Not quite 50/50 but it worked. I was in an accident and broke my neck and back and couldn’t work for a while. He seemed excited and very encouraging for me not to go back to work. The house is clean, food is much healthier and less expensive than eating out or picking it up in my way home, my garden is thriving. I am much happier as well and so is he knowing that he’s taking care of the money and I’m taking care of our home. It just works.
Blessings in disguise! ❤
I hope you healed up well.
@ thank you! I absolutely did. God had his hand on me for sure. I can’t twerk or shake my butt due to the rods along 5 lower verts but I’m fine with that! Never was my thing 🤣. Thank you for your kindness and I hope things are well with you!
What a story. Glad to are doing well and thriving with the new dynamic in your relationship.
Or, orrrr, we could just stop with all the childish games. If you feel the needs to constantly test your significant other, then the problem lies with you. And you probably weren't ment to be to start with.
Bingo !!!
Thank you!!!
It seems to be more of a prank than a test.
A prank? I guess I must be getting old. I remember when pranks were actually funny.
@@jirish5029you are a 50/50 guy?
My husband and I have both taken turns to support one another through school as well as both working full-time, depending on the season. Our mentality is that it's all "our" money and as long as we work together and support each other in life, we're succeeding. But that is just what works for us, everyone is different.
problem is _most_ ♀ don't have that mentality. Their mentality is *my money is MY money, and his money is OUR money*
My girlfriend recently broke up with me because I'm still not economically stable (I'm 23) and because in the future she would expect that I make more than her on a monthly basis and be the main provider, while she gets to keep her money she makes to herself. What you're describing is exactly what I want from a relationship, where we both work and build together and some months one or the other won't be doing as well, so its the responsibility of the other to step up and support during that difficult time
My husband and I contribute 50% paycheck to a shared account but I control our finances. He supported me when I was in school (math major) and I supported him when his job went bankrupt. Hes bluecollar and fixes our house and I tell him what to pay where so we get a new stove from all the cashback this year. We still have our own account but I've done the work to get him from a 400 credit score to 700+ so if I say pay a bill, he works OT and pays it.
@@alabaster3535 That's just a better way to live with a partner in general. Idk why so many men want women to be this way and men are the providers all the time, it makes no sense. A woman and a man should be working and providing for each other. That's how partners work. That's literally the definition of a partner actually. Can't people just live how they want? Regardless of "roles", we're humans not animals. Some things that might work for one won't for other's and this really needs to stop. This is one of the only issues I have with "gender roles". Everyone is different.
@@reed9739yes ma'am, no ma'am, three bags full ma'am.
Russian women are more traditional and respect their men. American women fought for equality and got it. I don't hear or see Russian women walking around saying they don't need a man.
It is really about good decisions and good leadership. Men are rarely taught about what it means to lead their family anymore. This results in women not being able to settle into their role. Single mother households exacerbate this problem.
Stop telling young men to man up and begin teaching them how to lead with masculine compassion and confidence.
Because russian women are taught from the start that they need a man to be happy and have a fulfilling life. There's a lot of pressure in the society.
Both cultures have very high divorce rates though. I don't know who initiates it over there, but it has become too risky (for men) to marry in the USA given that marriage is no longer an enforceable contract let alone a covenant held--and lived--as a symbol/illustration of the covenant between Christ and His Church. All we see is 304s, some in the open and others waiting to jump Ship which their hypergamy itches. Vows are empty.
@@Erewhon2024 we need to educate young men about hypergamy and female behavior so men can better manage their families.
Women have become intolerable due to laws making it advantageous to divorce their husbands. Men need to be educated about ALL of this.
If it ain’t 100/100, walk away. What a mess!
Well said
Amen!
Team work makes the dream work! What is this 50/50 nonsense
@@pooksmagoo6521exactly. Just do what needs doing.
Agreed
Men don't mind being traditional if the women were traditional.
And vice versa.
*Men don’t mind being traditional as long as they have the means to.
If you don’t have it you don’t have it 🤷🏾♀️
dresses, caring , generous etc
False
Sorry but some of us do mind. We aren't making enough salary to support an entire family. Economically privileged people have that option. We don't
I can’t watch this. Just combine your money. Pay bills that way. You’re not roommates. You’re a married couple.
This!
This is what I was thinking. If I said this to my hubby, it would be about our joined bank account and it wouldn't be good 🤷🏻♀️
Agreed! I don’t get this mindset at all. I haven’t earned an income, but neither me or my husband would say it’s his income and he pays the bills. We are 1. It’s our income and we together make our family work. So just because I’m home taking care of our kids, the kids are only mine? Of course not. Even the comment section of so called trads are weird. If God forbid my husband can’t work and I bring in an income it would still be ours.. society has lost their mind
I think it boils down to people not having conversations with, and finding compatibility with, either significant other about how to approach creating and maintaining the home.
Both should be doing their part with their time, energy and income(s) to prosper. Finding a dynamic that works is great, but how you prepare for and handle situations together when the dynamic doesn't work is what matters most.
@@tinas7653 💯
The thing that I like about 50/50 relationships is that I don’t like relying on people.
Call me paranoid, but one of my biggest fears is getting into a relationship with the perfect partner, and I give them access to my finances (whether that be my work income or their allowance), and then out of no where that perfect person turns into an abusive monster. I’ve read too many stories about that.
And because everything in this world is surrounded by money, to control my finances is to control me as a person.
If I ever get unlucky enough to find a person who ends up abusive, the idea of having money to get away is reassuring
JUst an FYI, more men are in abusive relationships than women today.
When in college, we did 50/50. He moved in with me for my safety, as I lived in a dangerous neighborhood. Once I graduated, he had a huge mental health break and i took 100% of the finances while he got back to healthy.
Before we had kids, 50/50ish. After kids, i stayed at home. Since then, I now save us childcare costs by work exchange at the kids school. I have the same days off they do, but don't make money.
And we love how it is now. Once kids start moving out, I'll go back to working for a paycheck.
Thank you for being realistic! This is how it is for most people.
That’s what I wanna do work at the school idk where to start I have put in a volunteer app and no call but I want to be at my kids school have days off with them
@jocelynmarin1609 I started long ago, like 9 years? Principal put out an email looking for parents who wanted to help. From there, I was doing after school care, then moved into being an aide.
I appreciate all of the comments stating that its odd to test your spouse like this in the first place. I would not do this to my husband. There are enough worries in life, why fake one to add on to the pile?
It's just a joke and it's not that deep
@@jackiedoesntcaretesting your relationship is a "joke"? If my partner did that I would be furious!!! What kind of moron would do something like this???
Hi! A comment from Russia here. The men from that video are mostly older gentlemen, plus the interviews are taken in big cities where salaries are much higher. Yes, our culture raises men to be providers, that's true, but in current economic conditions in most couples both people have to work, especially those who are young or live in smaller cities/villages. And we also have guys who are not ready to pay even for the first date, don't trust the impression that every man here will easily spend money on his lady. But good men DO take responsibility and work hard, especially if the family has kids.
She is too young to understand reality. She will learn…
Our culture teaches women to be subservient if men "provides". And most of their women still work, but because they may have lower salaries, men are "providers"
Older gentlemen where exactly?😁
The guys in the video were 25-35 tops, that’s young
It does not matter. She is promoting Russian agenda here
@@Ааа-ш5ф3ъ You're right. But in Russia "young" is under 21-22, so yeah. Here if you're old enough to graduate with a bachelor degree means you should have your life together (wich is obviously hella hard and not at all a norm, but is expected from you, especially if you're a man).
If you feel the need to test your partner constantly, why are you even in a relationship?
That first one seemed to me as though she took charge of paying the bills, even though he also earns the money. As in, that is her responsibility. That’s why he didn’t know who they pay the rent to. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t do his fair share. We don’t know how they split household duties.
Maybe he moved in with her so it's her lease and he just sends her his half every month.
Possibly! I don’t work but I am the one that pays our rent/utilities using my husband’s money. I had to take care of my own bills before I met him so I am used to it and actually feel better doing them. My husband has a general idea of how much we spend on bills (we do have a spreadsheet) but he isn’t actively involved and doesn’t need to be as long as I am paying them with the money he provides. It’s a great dynamic for us and could be similar for them (except they probably both work).
Agree. My husband and I have a joint account that we share, but I am usually the one processing/paying the bills.
Exactly my elderly neighbors always joke around and the wife says that if she was to pass that her husband wouldn't know how to pay the bills or where to even find them. She doesn't work and he makes all the money
Even if… that’s not how you should react. Man or woman.
Stay-at-home mom here, married 22 years. My husband even takes my car and puts gas in it for me. And I make him his favorite egg sandwich everyday for lunch. A good man and good woman compliment each other. I like that we’re different, but together we make a strong family.
That is adorable! He fills the gas tank… forget the flowers, that is romance ❤
If he's doing all that, he better be getting some steak, protein bowl, meaty soup, beef stew. 😅😊
My guy does all of those things for me, too! And we donʻt do the whole 50/50 thing. We are there for each other, and we donʻt disagree on a lot. When we are upset with each other we donʻt give ultimatums. He treats my adult kids like theyʻre his and is respectful to my friends. Idk where the idea itʻs 50/50 or one gotta do the chores and the other pays for everything.
Exactly
What if he dies… who pus gasoline in your car then
I earned double what my husband earned. So I paid for regular things - rent, groceries, utilities. My husband spent only on personal items like clothing or gifts or vacations...
I cooked. He cleaned up afterwards...
He did what he could to the best of his ability, and I did what I could to the best of mine... Doesn't make him any less masculine or me any less feminine !!!
id rather do the cooking than the cleaning but whatever works better for your personal reslation ship is always best.
I'm glad this is working for you, for now. Statistically speaking, there is a greater than 90% this relationship won't survive like this.
@winoodlesnoodles1984 I would like to believe we beat the odds 😉 We have known each other for 12yrs, dated for 8yrs and have had salaries for 6yrs. I used to earn 100% more than him when we started our careers. I still earn 25% more than him. Maybe someday we will be even or he will earn more than me. But honestly, neither of use are worried. We could use all the extra money to travel 😂
Thank you for sharing this. You will receive criticism for it but you are a high value woman.
@@winoodlesnoodles1984 Do you have a source for this idiotic claim? lol of course not
I use to be like 50/50. I'm a strong, independent women. I got this. Men need help nowdays. It's just too expensive for him. BUT then I joined the army. And as a female...yeah I need to be spoiled moving forward 😅
A healthy marriage isn't about splitting everything 50/50. It's about both partners giving 100% to the relationship. Finances are a team effort, not a 'yours vs. mine' situation. When couples merge their finances, it's essential to communicate and agree on decisions together. The first video shows the couple had agreed to split their mortgage 50/50, but the woman later reneged. While I wouldn't personally choose a 50/50 financial split, it's clear why the husband felt she should take responsibility for her agreed-upon share. In my view, a healthier approach is: 'What's mine is ours, and what's yours is ours.'
But come on. It can always happen that something goes wrong. He should at least be able to come up with something other than "Will they kick us out?" In a realistic situation, if she went shopping and can't make her share now, there is grounds for anger. That's irresponsible behaviour. But saying nothing other than you don't know how to pay or will they kick us out is ridiculously incompetent... let's say this was due to unforseen medical bills, what would he have done? Shouldn't there be savings sonewhere for emergencies, or somebody that might be willing to loan them part of the rent that's missing and how can they recoop the money? Anything other than "Will they kick us out?" That is a surreal reaction 🤷♀️
@@walle5667 I understand your point, and it's valid to expect more proactive problem-solving. Perhaps his reaction was rooted in feeling overwhelmed or helpless. Still, communication and teamwork are crucial in navigating unexpected setbacks. Ideally, couples should work together to find solutions, like exploring emergency funds or temporary loan options.
Do these couples not have like joint checking
@@walle5667 I really think that vid is either completely staged, or he at least saw the camera and knew something was up.
In the first video she woke him up and unloaded a big thing on his lap. I (f) know I wouldn’t be able to process the info for another 30 minutes. I am in a provider relationship he earns the money but things have happened where I had to have a job so we didn’t go under. He let me wake up before we discussed options and solutions.
In an IDEAL world, yes, the man would provide financially, and the woman can take care of the kids. But realistically, many families CANNOT do this. Its futile ladies to watch these and compare your relationships. It just causes resentments and arguments. I love my husband, and we are 50/50. He is also disabled, and so there are times when i have to give more energy and time. I see it as God sanctifying me to be more like Jesus. My husband provides for me in other ways too. Comparison is the thief of joy. I'm a big Amala fan, but I disagree with this take.
He is disabled and you're trying to do 50/50?!
Same. Wife and I have been married a little over a year and we’re both in our 20s. How the hell am I supposed to provide everything at my age? I don’t make a whole lot..and what we should be doing with all her free time? We don’t have kids yet. Like just makes no sense unless the man is making enough to provide and they have kids
That was the cringe feeling I was having while watching this video. I don't agree on the take of Amala about things "have to be this way". Each relation is different and that balance requires a different approach on each couple. There is no such thing as 50/50, women want this or men have to provide.
I’m 25 and work part time, but my husband pays for 100% of everything. My income goes directly to savings and when we have kids I will stop working. Very content to feel stress free about money. When we were dating and he knew he wanted to marry me, he worked harder and got promoted so that he could make more money because he knew I wanted to be a stay at home mom one day. Ladies, don’t settle
Men don't settle either.
He sounds like a good man. Make sure you don't become part of the female trend who leaves a man like this because you become bored.
My wife and I did this. The agreement we had going into marriage was to live on my income and save hers for our first house or other big ticket items. It was a bit tighter and we couldn't always get what we wanted, but it worked. When she was going into labor with our first child, she put in for terminal maternity leave and that was it. She has been 100% dedicated to taking care of everything at home for almost 17 years now and it works great.
She is also the only reason I have a social life outside of work. She has friends, and they have husbands, so I occasionally get dragged on double dates or to someone's house with the kids.
DON'T LET HIM DOWN...
Heyyy I did this too! Worked full time until we had our first baby, then I switched to part time. When our second child arrived I quit completely. Now we have 3 and I can go back to work when everyone's in school.
I think it’s nuanced and have 3 different responses to each scenario.
1. She wants 50/50? Sure she is contributing half and of course I have a backup plan if she can’t make her way. (Unless she claims “strong independent woman”, then her ass is homeless)
2. She is forced to work due to the economy? We make it work for as long as we have to until it is feasible for us to live my income. But bet, I am looking for a better paying job.
3. She wants to be a full time housewife and mom? I am getting my ass out there and doing everything I can to provide for her and my kids.
Unfortunately a lot of women want their cake and to eat it to and to that I say then make them pay half.
My husband is a ups driver and im a stay at home mom. He works long hours for our family so i appreciate his hard work very much. I take care of our two children, clean, cook, shop, laundry, and sometimes yard work. I love my traditional marriage.
You know the value of being traditional, he knows it too but many woman want a traditional man and stay married to the club (outside vibes) many girls want be party girls with a man at home paying bills and if he ever said anything about her actions or clothing she will call him insecure
You been blessed and many people have traditions relationships it’s amazing 🎉
Good
I am the same way. I got greedy and wanted to have extra spending money so I went back to work and now my kids are being raised by a baby sitter while I put us in thousands in debt where I could've just shut up and been happy with excess luxurious things. I learned my lesson and will be going back to trad wifing it as soon as I pay my debts.
I do the same things and work 40 hours a week. Its called being an adult and you are not special. Stay at home mothers are lazy and have no ambition.
Hello, a girl from Russia is here. (the translator is helping me.)
Of course, there are more people who take responsibility and support their wife/girlsfried, paying for everything. There are also those who divide 50/50. But more often I meet those who on "paper are 50/50". But in reality it is one big budget and they help each other.
for example, Im working, and my boyfriend stays at home. For some peоple this is surprising and strange.
1 - I want him to find himself.
2 - he gets up before me and prepares food for me. (which I take to work. And every time this is what I would like, my favorite dishes.)
3. he does household chores.
4 - I can rely on him in any matter.
5 - when I didn’t have a job, we lived on his money and there were never any questions.
6 - he has his own small income.
So do what makes you comfortable, not others.
You are an exceptional case of reverse dynamic lol 😅. Don't think for a min that is the general norm.. many women will feel miserable and repulsed being permanent income earners/ providers .. just like many Real men will feel miserable being the nurturer full time.
Очень жаль, что многие люди не понимают, что это НИКОГДА не будет 50\50. Партнерство в отношениях не об этом. Иногда ваш партнер должен на 100% вас поддержать, иногда вы его. Иногда от кого-то нужно 75%, или 30%. Суть как раз в том, что вы сказали - нужна возможность положиться на партнера, у обоих должна быть ответственность. У меня похожая ситуация, но, к сожалению, парню приходится платить кредит, поэтому он сейчас тоже работает.
@@yoodjiyou Only conservative people like you have this misogyny mindset
It was very similar with me and my boyfriend for a bit. He couldn’t work, then I couldn’t work. Now we’re both back on our feet, and neither have to work as much. Life is crazy, we do what works for us and makes us happy :)
Sometimes we can only bring 25%, sometimes we bring 75%. As long as you’re a team, It works itself out
Thank you for providing more insight into Russian relationships…
Testing your relationship for a tiktok video especially if you are already married... these relationships deserve to end
I'd say about every 5 years we get a new declaration BY WOMEN about what THEY want and what men Should be. I am woman hear me roar. I'm a strong woman and I don't need no man. Men need to be more sensitive. More emotionally intelligent. My money is my money. His money is my money. Happy wife happy life. My body my choice. I didn't make this baby by myself so more child support. You will never see these kids again. These ain't your kids. He's sassy. Men aren't masculine any more. What happened to the time men took control? I'm not your slave or maid!! I can do anything a man can do. I'm not doing that job!!! Divorce. Prenup. Sprinkle sprinkle. Drizzle drizzle. 50/50. No!!! No man would ever ask his woman to go 50/50. Ok, 50/50. Naw, I'm good. Passport. Passport. Loser. Loser.
"every five years i hear a small group of women/leftists say stuff that's regurgitated and twisted in the echo chamber i'm in and it makes me so MAD that i decide to write a bunch of delusional induced nonsense that doesn't actually exist in the context of what general feminism has said but rather the web of lies I use to spin my own crafty little narrative! remember guys, allowing someone a choice ALWAYS means your indoctrinating them into an all or nothing, AM I RIGHT. remember guys, dual income lifestyle was definitely about pushing "strong women" and not providing your kids with a more, fiscally and educationally opportune childhood STAY WITH ME. remember guys, thinking that my husband who willingly made a baby with me should stay in the picture if abortion is banned and i'm forced to keep it is CRAZY. expecting MEN to provide for their CHILD??? disgusting."- you, definitely.
Said it before and I'll say it forever, my wife decides to post something online that intentionally makes me look bad is also her deciding she wants a divorce. I don't put up with blatant disrespect.
Good for you but I hope that never happens. These trends are so destructive
Thaaaaank youuuuuu!
There are entire Insta accounts of families where the wife basically pretends she runs everything and the husband can barely keep up, and it’s such a poor message for young people watching.
The only men that looked bad in this trend were the men that weren’t doing their job. 😊
@@FaithAnswered and how do u know any of these women were "doing their job?" So quick to be judgemental with no factual basis
@@FaithAnswered no doubt. We all gotta do our part.
2:00 this guy is rethinking the entire relationship. he's like what do you mean we can't pay rent because of black friday?
Yeah, she is saying that she misused the money to pay the rent in something else
Facts!
No, what has me reeling is what was said at 1:21. "...I don't know who we pay rent to..." See, I don't know if he's saying that because they live in a house, but you still pay a mortgage once a month. And that goes to the people that manages your mortgage account. How do you not know who those people are?
@@finalXcloud priorities, we care about major flaw, you care about small issue that by default is covered by his wife
To be fair, we aren’t going to know if the guy in the first video would’ve gone into solution mode. From his perspective, he was talking to his wife privately and acted calm probably because he got the vibe from his wife (because she was pranking him) that there was no immediate concern. If he knew he was being filmed then he would’ve acted a lot different. In the end, his “trusted” wife secretly filming him for the world to view was probably the worse part of that video.
Agree. But also, she prefaced what she said by "hey, I know we're both about to go to work..." Since we've no other context, I might be willing to give the guy some grace and say maybe he's not a morning person. I'm definitely the opposite of one myself. If someone came to me with a non-adrenaline problem at 5:30 AM, the gears in the brain just aren't going to be turning yet. Give me an hour to wake up and I'll be all over it though.
Idk the fact he didn't even know who the rent is paid to and how it works is a huge red flag. Sounds like an irresponsible person.
I'm the same way! I need at least an hour to actually wake up and be a functioning adult. Iget up a lot earlierthan the rest of my familybecause of it. Otherwise I am basically useless for the first portion of my morning!! 😅🤣 Best wishes to you and yours!! To EVERYONE!! May God bless and protect Us ALL!!!💖🙏💖🫶@@TheNCreid
yep
#OutOfContext
@@TheDarkLasombra Or they each have their responsibilities and the mortgage payments were being looked after by his wife. So he never needed to know.
13:31 Men didn’t ask for the 50-50 relationships, women did. This take is completely backwards. They asked for it and aren’t happy with the results.
6:27 Albanian man is the real man. He knows his job and respects and appreciates his wife’s job.
Hot and holding a baby, too! Top tier!
That one was my favorite!
😂 I worked with a whole bunch of Albanian men. Not “the real man” 😂 Real men know what a shower is!
And he had the baby at the time
Albanian men definitely have a strong provider mindset. I’m half Albanian
My late husband and I were "50/50" all the time, our entire 14-year relationship. There was never any "scorecard" or any expense tracking. If I came up short, he was there for me; if he came up short, I was there. No questions, no judgment. Why is there suddenly something wrong with people being financially responsible within a relationship and supporting each other?
🤌
This is such a refreshing comment to read in this discussion. I disagree with Amala on the notion that a relationship built on traditional gender roles is likely to be healthier than a 50/50 dynamic because I have seen so many "traditional" relationships turn sour, leaving both people trapped in a miserable situation. I'm genuinely happy for anyone who can build a healthy relationship, regardless of their values and relationship dynamics, and I think that we could all benefit from being more open-minded in understanding that it's not black and white - what works for one couple doesn't work for everyone and that's ok.
@@madisonlewis1268 I think what it really boils down to is that people are free to be themselves in the relationship, and they truly like (not just love) each other as they are.
I've read a few comments from people saying how exhausting it is to be around people in a 50/50 relationship and how it can never be truly 50/50. I think it's important to realize that it's not about a literal interpretation but rather the goal that you're both contributing to achieve 100% without animosity. It's definitely not something everyone can do.
Most women are entitled and complain if the man doesn't pay for everything
I live like 50/50, but it didn't stop me from acting like a traditional man, with my wife knowing, eventually she needs to do some traditional wife stuff or she risks to have me upset.
In practice she just feels guilty when I suddenly clean whole place solo or cook solo... Because I never let her do that on her own.
Kinda exhausting to always be "it must be done" man, but life aren't honey
You killed me at “ladies…. Do you have your passports?” I died 😂
@@elizabethsmith6770 And people have the nerve to get mad at “passport bros”
Passport sis😄
@@olgavasileva7238 😂
Men can pay the bills, fix the home, feed the pets, clean the home, cook the food... then get blamed for relaxing 5 minutes and called a complainer for asking for help.
Testing a relationship is a 🚩 regardless of your financial relationship
Jordan Peterson said that a woman who tests her boyfriend is a smart woman.
You know people can lie right? Than how woman can know?!
Wait what? Perhaps you mean strictly loyalty tests or stuff of that nature but the whole dating phase is a test... testing for compatibility from mutual values and morals and to evaluate their character
@ If you’re specifically creating situations just to see how someone responses you are a red flag. If the two of you are just going through life together to see if you’re compatible or asking questions upfront like do you want kids cause I do or are you religious that’s another story.
@@LA-ie5gd okay yea I agree
We've been married 35 years. We both work. We share the bills. We have three accounts: hers, mine, joint. We split household responsibilities BECAUSE WE'RE ADULTS. If one of us came up short, its a conversation and we find a solution. People, please stop playing these silly games with each other.
Thank you for the slice of normality here. 👍
I was a stay at home mom with our 4 children including a new born. He was military and deployed a fair bit. We did good. Until we didn't. He decided to abandon me and our 4 children 1 night. Paid child support, less than $200, for a couple of years then left the state and had no further contact with his children. I went to nursing school to support my children and myself. Not a fun part of my life. Not an easy time. I was scared, tired and at the end of my rope. But I had no choice. I had to keep going. There were many nights going to work that I thought seriously about flooring it and driving into a pine tree. But I couldn't because of my kids. They had no one else. That was 30 years ago. The kids are grown and doing great on their own now and I'm a happy grandma 🎉❤.
I'm so sorry. Women often have to be the strong ones, for their kids. I wish you'd had the man you deserved, but at least your kids had the parent they needed.
You're an incredible person for this. Wow what a story.
Please tell me the "father" NEVER had a "say" in their upbringing.
@SteelToes how could he, he wasn't there.
What I'm trying to say, is you never know what life is going to hand you. My husband left me high and dry. But it could have been that he died. Sure there's insurance. But that won't sustain a family for the rest of their life. A woman has to be prepared in case of the worst scenario. She has to be able to provide for herself and her children. I have nothing against a stay at home mom. I just advise that she educate herself just in case. My story is far from a rare occurrence unfortunately.
I don't understand why any working woman would complain about contributing to household finances. The whole 50/50 concept shouldn't even be a thing. Especially in relationships where the female partner makes just as much money, or more, than her husband. Modern women wanted to earn more, so take the responsibility of paying some bills. It's only fair.
I am willing to bet that this is not an issue in same sex relationships.
I live in Russia, and here it is very rare for women to be 100% supported by men. Most often it's 50/50.
At the same time, you are obliged to raise children, because most often men believe that this is a 'woman's responsibility'. So don't rush to book your tickets)
Well, this was to be expected. The current economy does not allow for this type of arrangement in common reports. Only those who have money or have inherited something have this freedom demonstrated on social media.
Im guessing thats why they asked the men, and didnt just assume theyd provide
In the same way, many men ask for children and then abandon them without coping with the responsibility, and the woman pulls everything on herself alone!
Yeah, I didn't believe the russian guys in the video. Women in eastern europe were never just housewives like in the west, they were expected to be on the fields and factories alongside men. And usually one paycheck wouldn't be enough to support a family anyway
50/50 is when you and your husband/Wife/partner both contribute what they can...we all have our strenghths and power shifts due to a variety of factors and circumstances.
Forget 50/50. I bring 100% effort and you bring 100% effort. Granted you may have off days but were only human. Bring 100% of what you can that day.
Figure out who is doing what roles and covering what. Just do your part.
And if these 100% are lacking through course of the years?
100/100 is exactly equal to 50/50, when you catch the feeling of other party slacking, you'll remember quick that thing you demanded to "forget"
Ironic
That first guy- I don't know. He seemed like he just woke up. That's kind of unfair to judge him so harshly, we have no context other than that disrespectful lady came up and lied about her finances and she didn't even have a good excuse she just says "yeah, I spent it on holiday stuff" Like what?! I'd be like yeah so, I'm not sure what we're gonna do about rent, but I'll figure it out and then after we are going to have to talk about your financial choices so this doesn't become a regular thing.
The man on the couch at the 3:30 mark, probably knew she was acting strange, and was wondering "what is she up to now?" The mindset of people doing what she is doing has a pattern of this behavior. She has probably done things like this before, and he probably knows she is recording it, at one point she even zooms.
Not only that she says "before we go to work" it's probably the morning too or just after he got up. That man is tired and now his girl is in his face with some bs hypothetical
We were 50/50 when we first got married. Then I started grinding my teeth at night with the bills. So my husband started paying the bills with my checks and his. Then he got sick with an auto autoimmune disease and couldn't work after about 3 years into the marriage. He still payed the bills with my money and I didn't have to grind my teeth at night. He has passed on after 23 years of marriage, and I pay all the bills now. It drives me crazy that bills come in at all diffrent times. I wish he was still here to pay the bills so I don't have to worry.
I’m sorry to hear of your loss, but it sounds like you had a wonderful and happy relationship.
@BrianDiCiacco Thank you! We did have an amazing marriage. I wished it would have been 50 years or more. But we married "late". I was 29, and he was 34. It was a great 23 years. Thank you again.
What a story, my goodness, praying for you!
if you call up customer service and are extra nice in your tone, oftentimes they will work with you to adjust the bill due dates to as close as possible to your preferred week or day.
sorry for your loss🙏 shit is rough out here bills due dates changing and the everything going up. You got this though🤞
I told my husband I spent too much on Christmas, because I did. And he was like “ok we will work it out don’t worry.”
As long as it’s not happening every Christmas, it should be manageable.
If that was the case one way to work it out would be to take back the Christmas gifts you bought and use the money to pay your bills.
My family has had a number of years where Christmas has had to be less than what I wanted to do because the money simply wasn’t there. It’s okay to not spend a lot, don’t let pride get in the way of taking care of your mortgage/rent FIRST and doing a smaller amount for gifts.
Him right now : "Wow, she didn't even try to show me appreciation or make it up to me. Oh well, such is my life"
@@kirbyourenthusiasmsmart idea. Of course, needs before wants. I don’t think a number of people understand that.
@@westonding8953shop starting in like June boom problem solved
This topic dovetails with divorce laws. Those Russian men don't live where they get hammered in divorce, no matter what. Their attitudes are different for many reasons than just who pays the bills. We need to look at the bigger picture here and solve the issues in the system.
The divorce court in Russia is just as bad as in certain U.S. states, plus the judge can through the prenup out of the window if one side (almost always women) assumes there's "injustice" in it. Our family laws produce as much fatherless children as the U.S. laws do if not more.
@@Черныйрусский-ь7б That sucks!
It is dangerous for women (or men or anyone) to depend financially on others. You need to know how to pay your bills & be financially responsible. I'm not saying traditional dynamics are bad, but there is an underlying threat dependents blissfully ignore. People die. Jobs aren't forever. The economy can tank.
Also, you can have a common account and pay bills from there. It doesn't have to be 50-50, you can have your own flow, but know how to pay the bills, how to save money & how to plan ahead.
You are two adults. Life spares no one. Be responsible. You are teamplayers, keeping the ship afloat together.
And in a lot of cases where men provide 100%, the women end up feeling trapped in the relationship and don’t have the means to support themselves financially or escape an abusive situation. It gives some women comfort to know they can also provide for themselves and aren’t completely dependent on someone else. You can’t generalize relationships, and 50/50 is not necessarily a bad thing if it works well and both partners respect each other and are willing to problem solve and support one another in a pinch.
That’s very accurate. Whilst I despair that the powers that be have worked to destroy traditional roles and break up the family unit, I don’t think returning to what was in totality is the solution.
Less programming, more individual solutions.
Most of the women today who say they want a provider just want a sugar daddy not a traditional relationship. It’s disgusting to put that on men in the current climate imo
I called my husband of 32 years a “sugar daddy”, and he exclaimed; I AM A SUGAR DADDY😄! He loved it.
@ not exactly the demographic I was talking about but that's nice
@@cynthiastinson7059 That’s cool Cynthia. But you completely missed the point.
@@cynthiastinson7059 same vibe as with "I AM A SIMP"
it's just cringe and deserves to be laughed at
The problem with the 50/50 comparison vs 100% responses is that they are only seeing the answers of the 50/50 crowd from a monetary standpoint. A relationship IS and has ALWAYS been 50/50... If a man provides the money and a woman takes care of the household and kids. That IS 50/50! Being a housewife is HARD and is a big job. And if you aren't a housewife or both work, always make sure there is a 50/50 dynamic in terms of value to the relationship. It's not all about money, but it's all about supporting and balancing each other for a healthy household.
Biggest failure is recognizing the MAN as part of the household needing her care. Most women won't lift a finger for his needs, while expectation is he never fails in his delivery. It is not in kind reciprocal effort he looks for, and society turns a blind eye to holding a woman to any expectations of return.
Return those Black Friday purchases and pay your rent woman. Stop testing your man.
Going on 30 years with my hubs. He’s always been the main provider, but we’ve always shared our bills and money. I’ve stayed at home with the kids and I’ve worked when I wanted to or when we needed some extra money. Now, we’re business partners.
If you want a successful relationship, you need to be all in. The pastor who married us told us it should never be 50-50, but 100% effort from both partners, no matter which roles you choose to take on.
I’d leave HER for putting me on blast. I don’t know the circumstances of his relationship.
My parents are retiring, and my mom has just realized she has no idea how to pay the bills or do taxes. She wants to learn (teacher retirement includes funeral benefits, so that freaked her out). My older brother learned how to pay all of the bills in a foreign country in a language he didn't know in order to pay for his wife and children who are natives. My oldest brother's wife happens to make a lot more money than him, so they live 50-50, because she didn't want to wait longer for a house with a yard. It wasn't my brother being unwilling to pay for everything, it was him understanding what she wanted and being willing to put his pride aside to support her in making her goals his goals as well. He knows how to do all of the bills and frequently uses his pay to arrange for contractors for home improvements as his way of trying to make it up to her.
I think it’s weird to test your relationship on the internet, or in general ngl. One thing to chat with one another in private but like relationships are kinda meant to be private, just me or?
That's why I don't trust 👧 and I don't even try to please them. They are extremely emotionally unstable beings who follow the herd.
That's why I don't trust 👧 and I don't even try to please them. They are extremely emotionally unstable beings who follow the herd.
That's why I don't trust 👧 and I don't even try to please them. They are extremely emotionally unstable beings who follow the herd.
That's why I don't trust 👧 and I don't even try to please them. They are extremely emotionally unstable beings who follow the herd.
That's why I don't trust 👧 and I don't even try to please them. They are extremely emotionally unstable beings who follow the herd.
If a woman tries a single "relationship test" on me, that's it, she's gone.
Bruh... no... not a chance... ive always tried to make sure i have at least a full months rent in my emergency savings... anyone trying this crap ever, they need to be kicked out IMMEDIATELY!!!
None of these women deserve husbands if they test their man like this... beyond toxic
Facts
U took the word right out my mouth all this is showing how irresponsible those women are .horrible money management I don't get how people are fawning over this
THANK YOU
The issue with 50/50 is that a lot of men expect the 50% of the wages and 80-100% of the domestic labour. Unfortunately, with the state of the world most people can't survive on one wage. I myself work full time a demanding nursing job. I fully expect my partner to take care of me when I get home, likewise I take care of him. However, even if the economic situation was better, I still think that both parties should have financial freedom. While some relationships work out, a lot of time you see abuse in many of them. I would never want to be dependent on someone.
11:00 Do you have your passports, do you have yo shots 😂❤
“Your money is your money and my money is our money” is ridiculous.
combine the damn finances!
yep, is this video a joke lol
Agreed!
If he earns significantly more than her and, say she works part-time, I don't think it's a ridiculous thing to say then.
That's how my husband and I do it. His money is our money and covers bills, etcetera, my money is my money. But usually I use it for "fun" money for us and our kids, like drinks, fast food, date nights, things like that that aren't necessary. But if he's ever short for whatever reason my money rolls into bills.
It works for us
My husband brings in most of the money; I pay the bills out of our joint account. We're a couple, not two singles. Women have been the CFOs of families for centuries; men provided the income, women provided the management--because she was managing the household. This idea that women shouldn't be involved in the finances is ridiculous.
It's called "home ECONOMICS" for a reason!
Yes. This used to be understood not to long ago. Men make the bacon, and women cooked it, and made sure it got used accordingly. It was always this way. It used to be considered important until the feminists convinced society it was akin to slavery. It’s shocking that people forget this when feeding your family was a part of the bedrock of a good home. It is to be looked at with respect, not disgust. Glad some women are still around that get that. Motherly deeds are greatly appreciated by the children, and making sure that bills get paid is not forgotten.
When we were working, we used my husband’s check to pay the bills since he got paid once a month and I bought the groceries, put gas in our vehicles, and paid for our fun stuff like camping. Now that we are retired, we still use his check for bills, the monthly groceries. We both get Social Security and mine isn’t much, but that is used for prescriptions, eating out, c and medical expenses. At one time before our son started school, he worked three jobs so I could be at home with our son.
I got an insane true up bill in California in September. I was venting to my boyfriend how stupid it was and wondering who thought it was a good idea to charge a years worth of power to someone on one month’s bill to be paid by the next month. I’m not even kidding, the bill was literally almost 4k.
I was talking and venting and we switched subjects. We were on a walk at the time so when we got home, he ran to his little stash that he has and came straight to me and handed me 3k. I was shocked at first and told him I wasn’t complaining so he would give me money. He said that doesn’t matter and that he wants to help. No questions asked, he didn’t try and guilt me into not taking it. I actually tried to refuse and he wouldn’t let me. The man parted with 3 racks like he was offering me a jolly rancher.
Yeah, that makes him a keeper. 🤔
I call bullshit on them charging you the whole year on one month
Cool story bro. Nobody really cares
@@earonjaena9273Or just an idiot. Handing over that kind of cash is either well thought out, or straight up ignorant. Most likely ignorant. Chances are they don’t make it, and spending that much on a woman you won’t be with down the road takes away from your future wife, and family.
This entire video just comes across as shitting on men for not being rich enough to own a house and a housewife. You're better than this.
And some women aren’t pretty enough to be with a man who owns a home and wants his wife to have the option to stay home. Life isn’t fair but nothing wrong with having a chuckle at reality.
No. More of these videos are needed. There’s so much content from men shaming “modern women” (women who can’t bake bread all day because they have to provide for their families at their “girl boss feminist” jobs) it’s nice for once to flip the tables and let “modern men” feel how they have made “modern women” feel. I don’t see the problem. But I guess it ain’t fun when the rabbit has the gun.
Some women aren’t pretty enough for a man who owns a home and wants a stay at home wife? Hahaha those men actually pay for their wives to maintain their appearance, dusties don’t.
@@mimia.4810 women aren't getting shamed because they don't bake bread all day, they get shamed because they have 300+ bodycount and can't even cook spaghetti and still expect a loyal rich 6ft man.
It's also not men who are addicted to tiktok relationship drama.
@@mimia.4810why do you like watching people bash each other? Thats pretty sadistic honestly. If you want to watch women bash men or men bash women you’re a bit strange
Most of us men don't mind paying for everything. The problem is that nowadays women at the start are like "I don't care about actually getting to know you or loving you for you, pay for everything, also how much money do you make?👀"
I’d even say you can be a “broke” guy and still be a provider. My boyfriend for example didn’t have a lot of money when we first got together. That didn’t stop him from giving away what he did have to those who needed it. Just seeing him living a “poor” life yet always happy to share and give away what someone else might need more has shown that he is definitely a provider. I’d hope that for other women out there too, that they try to find a man with a big heart, not necessarily a big wallet.
@@jft2nd 💯
Maybe you are an exception, but the problem is a lot of men that talk about 'paying everything' have only that going on. 'I am Mr. Big Alpha, Imma pay everything, what do you bring to the table?' Like ok sir, i'll cook and clean but since your one defining trait is your providing status, provide. Don't get me wrong, both sides in this are selfish, that's why i'm not a big fan of 'trad' life, but again, i understand it could be demographics etc. if amala is meeting good 'trad' men good for her. im only meeting men who think money will buy everything
And most women now a days come with an “already made family”. I’m a that doesn’t have a kid of his own and never wanted them but majority of the women that come to me have a ready made family
@@jfull1989 my assumption is demographics. Where you live and your age. Both men and women need to face reality. When you are older people have a lived life and baggage. Don't complain you can't find someone if you were picky in your youth. Either be content single or work hard and find someone you love without complaint. Again. For both men and women. The whole gender war is stupid. No one is entitled to a relationship
I didn't even know that 50/50 heterosexual relationships are a thing i thought that was more for gay relationships ...😮
Absolutely not! This is what women fought for and deserve. Women have more advantages in the workforce and higher education today so they should have no problem paying 50% of everything.
If you’re married, combine your damn finances
But the freedom bs 😅😅
I thought everyone did combine…
💯📠
Exactly. People out here acting single while literally married.
Nope, my ex was terrible with finances, so we kept them separate. He'd say I deposited about X amount in the account or forget to tell me of a check he wrote.
Anyone who uses a test on me will soon be single
even one time coming up with nonsense and filming at the same time.... you out...
@@msbest9830Couldn’t agree more I seriously can’t wrap my head around anyone filming and posting their relationship dynamics.
Almost everyone will test you without you even realizing. Just like you are trying to test the water now with your statement.
And somehow it's always the women who play these dangerous games.
@@CrimsonEclipse it's about keep your dirty laundry indoors. Test by itself aren't that ridiculous as the phone she holds to capture that.
In case where you didn't know who you pay rent to, because you never actually do that yourself - it's furious to know you let another "smart" woman to know and complain out there how irresponsible you are
It's common sense that people aren't fun of being judged for free
I'm actually suprised in this economy all these men are able to support their family on a single income.
I can afford to support my wife and our five kids because I have a job making 80k a year and we live modestly. I went to college and have a state licensed job with my degree. I want a PS5. I'll be working overtime at some point to get it. We do a lot of free activities. Hiking, parks, libraries. We have a home gym rather than a gym membership, which has saved us a lot of money in the long run. We watch movies at home rather than at the theater. None of us wear designer or high-end rack (Gap, American Eagle, etc.) unless we get gifts or Christmas money. We almost always eat home cooked meals. And that doesn't have to be blah. Just the other day, I taught myself to make marsala sauce from a recipe when my wife didn't feel well. We had that with sauteed onions, pasta, and meatballs for dinner. Whole meal probably cost 12-15 dollars for seven people, and we still have leftovers. And my wife hasn't stopped talking about how much she liked it. We don't replace our cars when they're paid off. We make them last their entire lives. I've been driving the same car for twelve years. My wife's been driving our van for seven years, now. I've saved enough money by keeping my car to buy my next car outright if the automobile market remains stable. I do my own car work when I can. That includes oil changes. We don't have every streaming service. It's cheaper in the long run to buy on sale what you know you want to watch, and rent it if you aren't sure.
🎶“Girls, do you have your passports, do you have your shots” HAD ME ROLLIN’ I think I woke up everyone in my house laughing. I LOVE it!!!
now men lets start a trend waking our women up at 2:30 in the morning telling her to make us a god damn sandwhich cause we hungry
😂😂
That's what little babies cry all night for! Or are men babies too?)
I gave up on dating years ago. That said, when I was in my 20s, I thought I wanted a 50-50 relationship. Now that I’m older, I would love to just have a partner. If he wants to take care of me, more power to him! I’d love to be able to help take care of him too.
Nice cat
I don't get the "your money/my money" thing in marriages. I mean if it works for you that's fine. I just don't get it personally.
We have "our money" and we trust that neither of us is going to be stupid with it. Frivolous purchases of more than like 20 dollars are discussed.
It's coherent with the "happy wife/happy life" that tradition always had but clearly that doesn't work with the high divorce rates where women initiate it 70% or around that percentage.
The reason he said that is to make his wife happy. That he is proud to be a provider and he doesn't need her money.
@@suzusuzu896it's because those women aren't happy which is why they initiate a divorce.
@@suzusuzu896 'Happy wife/happy life' is a modern, gynocentric concept that places the husband in a weak/subservient role where he must cater to and prioritize his wife's needs and desires (over his own) in order to keep her happy. The traditional concept was 'good wife/good life' which is about women being held accountable for their behavior; it also serves as a warning to men that bad/low quality women destroy peaceful homes and bring suffering to their families. BIG difference!
exactly, that's how I've always pictured it too. I find it so weird when I hear married couples say things like "I pay for this, my husband pays for that", "we pay 50/50" or "my husband gave me money" etc, it's like being married but still living like you're single or college roommates or something
From what I’ve seen lately a lot of woman aren’t trained to be stay at home, and if they are stay at home they don’t really bring anything to the table. The guy will go to work and then still have to cook and clean while the girl ended up doing a few small chores and and pretending that they are still in high school. At that point I’d rather have them working to help out with the finances so you aren’t stuck doing everything for yourself and a dependent. We’d all love for the traditional way of life but it seems like the skills aren’t getting passed down
I listened to this while making my amazing husband his lunch for work tomorrow, including a delicious apple crisp I baked because I know my family loves those. In the morning I help the kids make their lunch if they are running late. I then go to work for 6 hours, because my husband has always put our children first. I was home with them for 7 years. Once they were both in school I started working on a school to be on their schedule. Now 8 years later, I'm still at that school and I still enjoy working my 6 hour school schedule. Our children are now older (nearly 15 and 13), they need us much less than when they were little. But I still work a job that allows me to be a present mom because that is important to us as parents. Yes the pay sucks. But our children are only with us for a short time before they are grown and off living their own lives. I will forever be thankful to my husband for being our main provider, and for always taking on more for his family. Because of that I will always take on more with juggling the kids schedule, appointments, cleaning, cooking, bill paying, etc. Love our more traditional roles!
Apple crisp? Can I be your husband lol
@areyoudoingthisright I like my current husband. But I do joke about taking on another husband to help pay bills, and another wife to do the cleaning. Then my husband and I can just travel more 🤣
Men are suppose to lead and be the providers but feminism changed that dynamic
I hate feminism for this reason.
My mom once said that the main thing we got from feminism was for women to have two full-time jobs.
@@hollymorris9652 твоей маме нужно почитать учебники по истории. Большинство женщин всегда работали, кроме женщин с деньгами.
@hollymorris9652 Ain't that the fucking truth!!! 😤
Что ты имеешь ввиду когда говоришь слово "лидировать"? Я могу понять другое слово. Если женщина становиться домохозяйкой и остаётся дома с детьми, понятное дело, что мужчина должен зарабатывать деньги иначе на что они будут жить.
It's not that I don't want to have a traditional relationship, it just seems impossible. I'm 30 and disabled. There's no hope for a career where I can make enough to support myself, and there's no hope of ever finding a woman to be in a relationship with.
Im a man in my 20s, and my wife and i have been together for 6 years. Our financial situation at the beginning was me about 85%. When covid hit, my wife was able to get a job that paid more, and expenses went up, and it became like 60% me. Now i make more, and it's up to 75%, and we have kids. I would eventually like to move to 100%, but my wife said she wants to contribute some, so im guessing it'd be closer to 95%.
That being said, i think that if im paying for almost everything, my wife should be holding it down at home, which she agrees with me.
I can see were a lot of guys are coming from with the whats in it for me aspect because a lot of women that want her man to be in charge of finance also dont want to do household tasks, and pretty much want a dad for a husband.
It's kind of sad to see a lack of maturity from both men and women in this aspect (and overall, to be honest)
These trends piss me off man constantly being compared to the most successful when your trying to build your self
Y’all need to do better.
@@chocolateprincess8543 okay "chocolate princess" 😂
"I just created a problem from my own sh*tty behavior, and I am now angry that you didn't urgently respond to my fictitious emergency" - way too many women
Chicken or egg dynamic: an absolutely massive number of American women have an outright disdain and disrespect for men. Obviously not all, but enough that it's absolutely poisoned the relationship culture. It's unreasonable for women to expect a provider relationship from someone who they hold no respect for, so it's not surprising that men's outlook on this has soured. By the same token, does the lack of the provider mentality just serve to further this disrespect? I can't say which came first, but both mentalities are leading us on a downward spiral.
That lack of respect is due to social media giving women the illusion of infinite choices. Most of them will be like "Oh, you don't want to buy me something or provide? I'll just hit up john from LA, who slid in my DMs months ago and replace you."
Ehhh some of the push for 50/50 isn’t lack of masculinity. Granted, I can see the debate with the first guy, but some of it is straight defensiveness over divorce rates in the US and what usually happens to the men in those situations.
Not every guy goes that route(obv from the video) but enough men grew up watching their parents or their friend’s parents go through viscous divorces and in 80%+ of the cases, the wife totally screwed the guy.
The celebrity divorces where these women get like $50,000 a month in alimony isn’t helping the optics either.
There is no debate with the first guy though. She said she mishandled money like an immature child. Why is it expected in this day and age, and this economy. That he would just have the money. I’m not reassuring my wife/girlfriend that everything will be fine, when there would be no problem if they acted like an adult to begin with. Lastly, she could literally just return the gifts, and get back her share of the rent. Don’t excuse childish behavior in women. They thrive on that toxic crap.