Yeah, I get that catfishing is horrible, but if the dude literally jumped at the chance for an online side piece in less than 20 minutes, it's not too much. He would have cheated with a real girl, probably already had some one night stands up until this point. Will he do the same thing behind his next girlfriend's back? Yes, I think he will.
I'm 66, and I live in a senior apartment complex. Being one of the younger people 😮 am shocked at the bullying that goes on here. There are 2 women here who were definitely bullies in their younger years. You're absolutely right, Charlotte. If you're a bully as a kid, you'll be a bully forever. It was a shocking revelation.
I'm 60 and the youngest owner in my senior complex and have also lived in here the longest of everyone. I burst out laughing at your comment... because it's so true! We have quite a few bullies living here... although now a days... I just call them all Karen.😂 I have 2 serious chronic illnesses and the Karen's continue to bully and harrass me to serve on the strata council. I know my limits and such a task would cause relapses in my illnesses... and I have worked too hard and too long to recover to the point I am at now. These are the type of people who have bullied a woman whose sister passed away here.... into replacing a hallway carpet at the cost of $10,000 because her movers supposedly ruined it. Ah the joys of community living.... NOT!!
When I was a kid I used to think that old people were just nice and sweet. And then my mom told me that sometimes young mean people grow up to be old mean people just cuz someone's old doesn't mean they're sweet.
Have to admit that I did some petty revenge myself, I was bullied through the whole of high school after leaving for university I was out with my sister on a night out in my hometown, I bumped into one of my bullies from school who obviously did not recognise me.. I let him buy me drinks all night letting him think that I liked him. I waited till the end of the night and when he asked if I was going home with him I dropped my name and then explained that the drinks all night (expensive ones) would be some small way to apologise for the hell he and his friends caused me for years!
That is freaking awesome good for you! F them bullies, I also had guys years later after school try talking me up, like damn you might not remember all the hurt you caused me but I sure do..Have fun living the rest of your life knowing you peaked in high school! 🫡
My petty revenge is NOWHERE near yours (which is epic btw) but in middle school some girl was being so mean to me. So when everyone left for recess, I went into her backpack and found a bottle of lotion. I undid the cap and put it back upside down to slowly leak out.
I talked with a girl I went to high school with after she sought out my mom and got my number and she told me I was the only good thing about high school and to thank me for treating her so well and making her feel like she had a real friend. I had no idea what she was talking about because I don’t recall doing anything special, I truly liked her. But apparently I was her comfort and she has never forgotten me and inviting her to my 16th birthday meant the world to her 🥺 We stay in touch now. You never know how you will impact someone’s life, so treat everyone well!
That's so sweet! You really changed someone's life for the better. You thought it was nothing, but it shows how our behaviour can make a huge difference to someone.
I was a noon supervisor at my local school yrs ago and I was nice, fair and I was amicable with the kids vs just an authority figure. Anyway, one kid, well he is like 22 now, just msgd me to say thank you for always being uplifting and positive, that's its really helped him ❤
9:09 I got an apology from one of my bullies. He actually wrote me a very lengthy message and explained how in therapy it made him realize how mean he was towards me. He even sent a message to my parents apologizing to them as well for putting me through hell and hurting them as he made derogatory comments to them too. He grew and for my well being and his I forgave him as did my parents. It was a shock that he sent the message but I am glad he did. One less suitcase of trauma to unpack
That is really awesome! It sounds like he wasn't prompted to apologize and wasn't trying to get something out of it. You can usually tell when an apology isn't genuine but this one does sound like it really is. Some people can change for the better.
@@dragonfliesnh4204 Absolutely. It was like he finally had seen the error in his ways and wanted to make amends. It felt good to let go of some of my emotional baggage.
One of my elementary school bullies apparently saw me at a plasma donation center where she was working. She messaged me a few days after my visit on social media explaining to me that she was frightened to approach me because she wasn’t sure how I would’ve reacted. She apologized for all of the many many many years of torture, including the horrible nickname that followed me until my graduating day . she said that she now has multiple children and that she would never want them to go through what she put me through. This interaction happened some years ago and I don’t remember if I accepted her apology.
The fact that they're coming directly to you means they did change. It takes a lot of courage to accept your past mistakes. That doesn't change the trauma you went through and you don't have to accept the apology of course, I just mean that this kind of bully doesn't have an agenda and I'd be much more likely to forgive them personally :)
The tragic part about being bullied is that it ends up effecting our self esteem, self worth, and overall personality. The way we react to situations as we get older are effected by all that bullying. An apology is appreciated, but it doesn’t change the outcome.
My elementary school, straight through all of high school nemesis became one of THEE greatest, kindest most generous people that I've ever known. In fact, we both became mothers pretty young (20) & THAT is what changed her _whole entire_ personality, for the better. We're still _very_ close personal friends to this very day, all these 27 _years_ later. People can & do change. However, I've found that it's _usually_ when they are still pretty young though. Parenthood can do it too, sometimes.
I love that baby name story! It reminds me of a story I saw on Reddit once. The OP had a sister who was always trying to steal the spotlight and outshine her. When OP and her husband were pregnant, the sister was pregnant too, and due before OP. OP/hubbie had a name picked out that was a unique name and was in honor of a member of his family (I think an uncle who had passed?). The sister was pestering her for what name she had picked, and as a joke/test, she and hubbie made up an awful, old-fashioned name and told sis that was their pick, and the meaningful story behind it (the true story, but fake name). Well, surprise, surprise, when sister gives birth, she announces on SM that they named their new baby . Sister even sent OP a message saying no hard feelings, but it's not like they owned the name. OP/hubbie said nothing. When their baby was born, they made their announcement with the real name, sharing the story behind it. Many of hubbie's family commented on it, understanding the sentiment behind it, and applauding them. Sister obviously knew she had been played, and started blaming OP that it was her fault sis's baby was now stuck with an awful name (that her partner had apparently hated from the beginning, but she gave him no say). I think the sister ending up legally changing it. It was the best kind of petty!
I gate kept every name after my first born until we knew the gender. Good friend and I were pregnant at the same time told her that if I had a boy it was going to be caiden and a girl it was caidence. Low and behold she had her baby shower gender reveal party. I went and she announced baby cadence. I was pissed/annoyed. Cadence was the only girl name I ever liked. Luckily, a month later, I found out i was having a boy and named him caiden. Never shared another name, ever.
5:58 The bully becoming a mental health nurse just reminds me of one of mine, who used to randomly tell me dead baby jokes like they were the funniest thing in the world, becoming a midwife. I can't imagine what I'd say if they were assigned me if I got pregnant.
Dude My step mother was trying to become a psychologist, and she was maybe a semester into school when she tried to tell my mom she wasn't bi-polar even though an actual licensed psychologist diagnosed her. Also the same woman who told me as a young impressionable child (like 4-5) that if I jumped off the roof and believed hard enough, I could fly. Thankfully I wasn't that fucking stupid and never tested it. Yeah...and she has another kid now....hope the kid's ok.
The "posting about my bullies" story really hits home, because my bullies did similar, albeit more (and worse). Encouraged me to end myself, called me fat and ugly, took my food, physically and s*xually abused me, etc. using the excuse "my family is poor and my home life is hard" for doing so. The worst one goes to Harvard now and wants to be a lawyer. I could scream. 🙃
I was bullied all the way through elementary school. Summer before high school I got extremely I’ll, almost died and in the process lost weight. I was not obese, but overweight by about 25 lbs. My attitude completely changed after I almost died. First day of high school when my 2 main bully’s started picking on me in home room I beat the crap out of them. Note I am 5’4 female and then 95 lbs, they were 5’9 and 5’11 and guys. I even shocked myself. After that I did not become a bully, but by golly when people bullied others I was the first to put the bully’s in their place. My mom and dad were not as thrilled as the school office became their new home. 🤷♀️ Through the years I have had many people from school say I helped them make high school bearable and for that I am so proud. And now at 66 I still do not let people walk all over me. I may be small but I am resilient.
You feel like Batman? I was also bullied in elementary school and also became a defender of victims when I entered junior high school. It feels so good to do what I wished someone did for me, and I've seen it gives strength to the ones you helped to the point where they can fight alone next time and the bullying stops.
You served justice, thank you for your service. They deserved to be put in their place if they feel the need to go out of their way to berate someone, slay queen! 💅🏻✨ Whenever someone picks on me I either give them the death glare or ignore them out of existence. Always gives me satisfaction when they don’t get the reaction they wanted, too bad. I may be fat but I’m not as stupid as they are. I’m not gonna let a bunch of nobodies decide to deem me the “#1 person no one would want to date” (that’s unfortunately stuck with me since 4th grade but thankfully I’m in 12th grade now so one more year to go) I cannot wait to write my senior quote and maybe get some sweet petty revenge on my number one bully 😈 we need more people like you in this world
If he was going to send nudes, flirt and sext with someone else when engaged, its probably best for her to have found out its highly possible it would happen for real, or has happened before without her knowledge. So well, i dont think it was too much. He fucked up, he took the bait. He shouldve ignored it or told the 'woman' off and shoeed his fiance immediately.
A guy who bullied me in middle school so aggressively I would go home crying. My mom made me join cheerleading because her motto was, 'If you can't beat em, join em.' We were "friends" for like a year. As adults, he hit me up like 2 years ago. He had lost his football playing physique. He asked, "How come we never hang out?" I asked, "How come you bullied me so badly growing up?" He blocked me immediately. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 it felt so good!
@thevintagecatnsw Oh exactly, aside from his looks, he can no longer skate by on. He is exactly the same. He could have apologized or talked it out, but he didn't.
Sounds like the type of guy to be a POS to a girl in school till she blooms then suddenly wants to hook up so he can use you as a toy and mistreat you.. trash assholes like that don't deserve a pretty girl like you to even bother talking to them. Reach for the stars and never look back.
He probably thought that since y’all were friends for a year after he bullied you that y’all were cool. He should’ve apologized instead of blocking you.
When I was a 1st year student Nurse, I was really badly bullied by an Enrolled Nurse (this was in the UK). The same Enrolled Nurse also bullied my friend, a 3rd year Student Nurse, named Liz. It got to the point that we were both seriously considering giving up our careers, as going to work was an absolute nightmare. Two months later, we moved to other wards, but never forgot the awful time, we’d had. Fast forward a few years and both Liz and myself became Nurse Tutors. Many Enrolled Nurses then took the opportunity to do the conversion course to become Registered Nurses. When a particular group started, all of the education staff went into the classroom to introduce ourselves. Well the Nurse who’d bullied us, looked at me and went a whiter shade of white, she then scanned the other faces and saw Liz! I seriously thought she was going to pass out, she clearly remembered how she’d treated us and had no idea, how we would behave towards her! We obviously behaved completely professionally and treated her in exactly the same way as everyone else. However, I think she seriously learned a lesson in that moment!
A horrible bully of mine in a college costuming class--we'll call her Laura--decades later went on to do an entire painting series against bullying! I found her on Facebook and messaged her about the irony of THAT but I doubt she ever saw it. Seriously, she was jealous of my art and several other things, I figured out later. The thing that really got me was that she turned the whole class against me (it was a small class). I hope you are reading this Laura C.
I was bullied by this girl from kindergarden to 5th grade. Somedays we were friends next day she would call me crazy & there was no way she would be friends with me. I was bullied by her for my weight, glasses, my home life & the very fact that my dad was not around. Fast forward into our late 20s, I had reconnect with an old friend from that school years after leaving the state. This friend was also friends with the bully & had sworn she had changed, & to at least hear her out. So I did. The bully dm'd me on facebook with a massive message. Turns out, life outside of school for her was much worse than mine. ( this doesnot justify her actions) She was being hurt at home in ways I could never image. Even though my most vivied memory of her was at breakfast in kindergarden when she showed us the new trick her dad had taught her. How to give a hickey. Long story short, she is in therepy for things and her therepist told her she needed to apologize to me, but didn't know where I was until our friend found me. She asked if were could be friends & I was honest, I said no, I will forgive her for the past but I cant forget what she had done. She was not fully ok with this but understood my reasoning behind it.
That's very sad. I'm sorry for what she did to you, and I'm glad you forgave her, and it's completely reasonable that you don't want anything to do with her. I also pity her a lot. She was being sexually abused. That's a kind of trauma no one should have. Sadly she took out her anger, frustration, confusion and hurt on you. And turning you into another victim. It was the only control she had in her life - hurting you. When she called you crazy, she was feeling crazy. When she was friends with you it was probably the good days for her. When she wasn't - I don't want to imagine what happened to her. I hope you found some closure in talking to her. I hope that you can one day truly move on from that time and forget it. I know a lot of people say forgive but never forget. But forgetting is a part of healing, memories fade. It's a natural part of life. The sweetest times of our lives become distant, vague memories kept alive by pictures and videos. It should also be the same for painful memories. Many times it's not. Remembering those times is a lot like hanging onto a branch wanting to wash away with time, and refusing to let go. So I hope that you can one day forget as well. Truly move on from that horrible time of your life. I'm so sorry this happened to you.
Her actions may be a case of horizontal violence. My guess is that as a child she was powerless to stop the abuse. She could not confront this adult who was treating her so badly. Because she was trapped she lashed out at another vulnerable child, ie she dealt with her over-whelming hurt by hurting you. What a tragic situation for both of you.
Storytime. I was bullied a lot as a kid, but it got particularly malicious in junior high. Six years ago, when I had just gotten out of detox and walked into drug rehab at one of the lowest points in my life, I almost walked right back out. The first patient I saw happened to be a girl who had spent our years in junior high tormenting me. I hoped maybe she wouldn't recognize me, but as we made eye contact, it was obvious that she did. She lit up, told me that I looked familiar, and asked my name. I told her. "I REMEMBER YOU!", she exclaimed. The next morning at the daily house meeting, a staff member introduced me, and asked for a volunteer to be my "buddy". My bully's hand shot up, and I just wanted to crawl into a hole and die. As the days passed, she was so sweet and kind to me. I thought that perhaps my memories of her in junior high were somehow skewed. One day I walked into the dining room, and saw her sitting by herself. I walked over to the table, and sat down across from her. "Can we talk?", I asked. She looked at me knowingly and said, "Is this about me bullying you in school?" My jaw dropped. I figured that either things didn't happen the way I had perceived them, or that she truly didn't remember how she had treated me. I was dumbfounded, but I nodded. What followed was one of the greatest gifts I have ever received. She explained to me that she was very aware of how badly she had treated me and others. She told me that at the time, she was struggling in life. She said that school was very difficult for her. She told me that she wasn't intelligent, that she felt awful about herself, and had no self worth. She explained to me that to try and hide the fact that she wasn't smart, that she bullied others as a distraction from herself, and to make others as miserable as she herself felt. She apologized sincerely to me, and related that now she was a mother of a son who was being bullied. She explained that seeing it from a mother's standpoint had been such irony, and devastating to her. She realized that she had put others through the same pain that her son was now going through. I walked out of rehab not only clean and sober, but with a new perception of my past. I was able to forgive those people who had bullied me, and that forgiveness set me free.
@@MsJubjubbird Hold up, when did I say it's okay for bullies to walk all over anyone? I was sharing my experience, from my point of view, and that's it. There was no need to be rude about it.
Oh no. She maybe gets a pass. Maybe. But the other bullies? Not without a sincere apology from each individual. She may have changed. But the others? Nope.
Yeah I think that guy who took revenge on the bully in that story was justified. Because to me it wasn't really revenge. The bully still had to CHOOSE to ruin his own life. He still had to CHOOSE to be a terrible person. He still had to CHOOSE to disrespect his partner and relationship. If he had just ignored the DM's or immediately deleted them then the revenge wouldn't have happened. The revenge was predicated on him being a terrible person. If he had changed and was a good person nothing would have happened. And to me that's what makes it the best.
Yesss!! I had an ex who would say terrible about women being lesser or say condescending things to me but ended studying to be a gynecologist. I thought that was ironic.
The baby name story reminded me so much of what happened to my dad when he was born. My grandmother had decided on the name Merle for him (it was a different time) and she told the wife of her husband's cousin about it. Now, this cousin was not a very bright woman, her lack of brains was quite famous in our family, and she immediately stole the name and gave it to her own son, oblivious to the fact that the two babies were cousins and would have the same last name. So my grandmother wound up calling my dad Merlyn (yes, with a Y) instead. Thing is, even that was too close, because when my own mother went to marry my dad, a whole bunch of people thought she was not marrying a nice guy named Merlyn, but the rather simple minded Merle (he took after his mother in all the worse ways). Heck, even this last year, my mom had to point out the difference between the two cousins when she went to her high school reunion, as people had apparently spent decades thinking she married the idiot of the family.
I found out that my cousin was pregnant just a week or so around the time I was ready to announce my pregnancy. By the time we found out we were having a boy (she was too) my partner and I decided to name our baby after his late grandfather. We were still deciding on a middle name but were set on the first. I get a text from my cousin asking about my baby’s name. One of the 2or 3 names she was choosing between was very similar to our name. Seeing as how we had decided, I told her our name and the reason for it. She proceeded to tell me she was leaning toward another name but the husband liked the name because it was the name of one of his favorite actors. Her baby was due first so I think you can see where this is going. I get another text from her as her pregnancy is coming to a close. She starts asking me if we plan on having any more children and asking if I wouldn’t want to name my baby after my partner seeing how it’s our first child blah blah blah. Like what? I told her we weren’t sure if we would be having more or what their names would be but we were set on this name. Anyway her baby was born first and she gave him the similar name and now anytime we are all together they’re both being called by the same nickname 🤷🏼♀️what can you do?
My sister was my bully up until I was 16 and she left home, she was still horrible for a few more years; even a decade later, now that she's gone to therapy and learned and is supposedly different, I still won't believe it until I see it myself. Even though I always knew that she was lashing out because she externalises her pain (I internalise), it never made it feel any less awful every single day; and I was also dealing with the bullshit from our parents that made her lash out. I can't remember who said it, but its true that "Your trauma isn't your fault, but it is your responsibility"; I don't care if someone is hurting, it doesn't make it okay to traumatise another person because of that.
My sister is 51 freakin years old & I'm 47, but she's the same villain I've been tormented for almost 5 decades. I hope for her own sake (and yours) that she's been humbled & genuinely treats you well. My sister did everything in her power to turn our mother against me, so I've been without family for nearly 5 yrs. 😢 Alone is sometimes better.
@@Lorian7748GenXr I hope so too, I don't want her to be unhappy, but it takes a lot longer to regain trust once its been lost. I'm sorry about your sister, its really not fair, I hope you've found peace with not having them in your, and that you have some great friends. I don't get how people think that sibling bullying is any better or more okay than by someone outside the family.
I hope therapy is helping your sister. It's good for her to take that step. However, the amount of contact with her is totally up to you. You've been traumatized. You also need time to heal. Do not let anyone guilt or bully you into anything sooner. Work on your time and draw sturdy boundaries, babes. May you have peace of mind.
I actually got revenge on the only person who bullied me while still in high school. This was the 80's and everyone was afraid of "devil worshipping cults". My best friend and one of my other friends were a bit ..... witchy. One actually became a wiccan later but back then they were just more goth. Me, I leaned to the preppy side :) Anyhow, my bully started a rumor that we were witches and had done all this stuff. I suppose we were dancing in the moonlight naked or something in their minds, which is about as far from the truth as you could get. I was raised in a very strict, Christian household. Well one day my friend, who was a drama queen, acted like we were fighting then bursts out of a classroom and does this thing with her hands and says stuff in a made up language and points at me so I act like she threw me into the lockers and I tell her how sorry I am for upsetting her and I wont do it again if she'll just let me go (I think I stole her soda or something equally dumb). She then looks at the other girl who had bullied us all who was standing near me at the time and says "so, you're conspiring with them against us? I'll teach her a lesson and you too if you do it again". Points at her wiggling her fingers and saying more mumbo jumbo. The girl actually thought she put a spell on her. It was HILARIOUS !! She followed me around for days begging me to ask Jen to take it off and swore to others everytime anything happened to her it was because of "the curse". Finally one day I told her she was the only one who could remove it. She had to simply be kind to everyone and it would go away but if she was mean again, it would come back doubly bad. Amazing how people can change on a dime when they think they have been cursed
Wait wait wait if your friend later became a Wiccan, then what if they have been witches in past lives and subconsciously knew spells and actually did curse your bully lmao imagine
Now its "cool" or definitely more acceptable to be Wiccan, so not sure if you could use that same tactic today, awesome story though!! I remember all the drama and mass panic over Satanic cults. According to a book I read not once was there any evidence of people being sacrificed for the devil, animals unfortunately, so not sure how that started Instead of Satanism nowadays it seems like the focus is on trans and Disney, so bizarre !
It's so strange to me that so many people brush off bullies as being immature & kids being kids. I remember always trying to befriend the kids i saw bullied to show them not everyone is that way & to make sure they felt included & cared about. Even in kindergarten, there was only 1 boy of color in our school & he was very very overweight for his age. Nobody played with him or spoke to him. Kids wouldn't pick him in teams & things.I remember specifically playing with him every day so he'd have a friend & not feel so alone. I continued to do this all the way through school & i still do it to this day. I'm not telling this story to brag or get a pat on the back. I'm telling it bc it's what makes me question others being bullies getting by with it & excuses made for them. If i had this kind of empathy as young as i did, how can so many people dismiss bullies as kids being kids?
It's super sad it's being labelled "kids are kids" and even called just bullyin. If adults would do the same to other adults, co-workers what kids and teens are allowed to do each other and be brushed off as"it's just being kid/ bullying" ... The adults would be charged and in court. Kids from young age can learn bullying and violence are wrong. There's no excuse that "they don't know better" they do. But they are just not held responsible. I got bullied 6 years, from age 10 to 16, i was called names, i was spit on, i was beaten, pushed down stairs, i was told to go k#** myself... And the most angry i was at teachers. They mostly laughed, especially when bully and target were opposite gender so they labelled it always as "crush" The most anger i get when I see my former teachers. At 16 was time to go next education, change of school and i went different direction than others. It was mostly okay, one bully appeared.. she was always asking rides and such, then kept writing hateful, insulting messgaes on school guestbook because me and friend were admins (time when social media wasn't a thing and guestbooks were). Funnily she kept writing her hatemessages from her bf's computer and his internet had same IP so simple search gave me his name and i knew. One day at lunch someone asked me if i knew who it was. I just said aloud (i knew bully was eating behind me) that messages showed IP and it's type of IP that's easy to track so i know exactly. That ended there. That bully is emt now. I have not seen anyone else from childhood. If i do, i just act like I don't know who they are. One childhood bully was strange.. she actually stopped as teen. Ofc never apologized but yeah.
My friend group and i do this, we had one kid eating completely alone across the cafeteria and my best friend saw him and just stood up, walked over, and asked if he wanted to join us. Fortunately the teachers let him move tables(this was in middle school and we all had assigned seats in lunch). Turns out he was one the THE FUNNIEST kids we've ever met, and always had something to say to make people laugh. Unfortunately he(and most kids at our table) kept getting bullied and harassed, most of us were a little overweight or something else about us people didn't like(*cough* gay *cough*). He ended up being framed for having a hit list and the principal said the school wasn't safe for him anymore so he had to change schools, I hope he made new friends though
@@taylabatchelder7175 why had the school assigned him to be alone? So many teachers don't show any empathy or care for kids being bullied. It seems they wanna stay out of it to keep good graces with entitled bullies parents. It's sad.
@@hayleymariemills nah the assigned seats happened in the middle of the year(kids were being goofy and would get in trouble so this was punishment), he got bullied out of his old table and moved to an empty one before they happened. The teachers told him that his seat would be there unless he wanted to move to another table, but he wanted to sit alone in fear that he would get bullied again. Thankfully he accepted my friend's offer to sit with us so he wasn't alone anymore.
Honestly, every time Charolette mentions her bullies I am just stunned. This woman is an absolute light. A pleasure, a beacon of joy and laughter, just an overall wonderful gift of a person. I adore her. So I simply cannot wrap my head around anyone ever being mean to my precious petty Queen.
I am a nurse and the best day of my career was when I went into work and saw that one of my patients for that day was my high school bully 😃 I went into her room to “ introduce myself”as her nurse for the day and the look on her face was priceless BUT what was even better was that she had gained at least 60 to 70 lbs. since high school, she worked as a cashier at a dollar store because she dropped out of college to help her fiancé get his degree and then they got married but her husband ( the popular guy from high school) had left her for a friend of hers and now she’s a sad single mom. Karma will find you one day so be kind to each other 💁🏼♀️
Absolutely LOVED the post that got even with those bullies! They were going to work with helpless animals and people with mental health problems! You did your country a HUGE favor.
I was bullied in school from the time I was four until the time I was 18, only one of the bullies ever apologize. He did this maybe three or four years after high school, but I found out 10 or 15 years later, when he was dating my boss at the time that he would still laugh about the stuff that they did to me and brag about it to her and other people. Just goes to show that, even though they apologize, does not necessarily mean that they regret their choices.
4:52 I felt such warmth in my heart and even said aww, when I saw the message " The potato army is very nice though :) Charlotte, that is so sweet. Hope ya know how much you mean to us and all the work you do.
I had several bullies in junior high b/c I was fat. One of them, I frankly approached him and asked him why he bullied me so much. We talked, and he actually quit. About 11 years ago, I was on Facebook for a while and found my other 2 bullies. Surprisingly, we were actual 'adults' and were able to just shoot the sh*t. So, you never know how it can turn out.
I had a bully that got in touch with me 30 years later and said he wanted to apologize for the way he treated me. We became good friends. 20 years later, he passed away, and I miss him.
There was a notorious and vicious bully at my school. Kids had nightmares about her. Parents complained about her. A kind friend invited her to her birthday party and she made the other kids and the birthday girl cry. When I was about 20 there was a piece about her in the local paper. She had hanged herself. Over 40 years later I still think of how terribly unhappy she must have been and I wonder if her home situation was abusive.
I never got an apology from any of my bullies, but I did find out why, eventually, and the ridiculous, silly reason for it. Evidently, they felt jealous of me for some reason that was so far from the truth that it was laughable to even think about. I did get some "revenge" when I went to a class reunion and saw those who had bullied me for my weight had all grown bigger bellies than I had ever had and were raging drunks besides.
@@moonhunter9993 It may go back further than that. Both her parents were Polish Catholic refugees who had been in forced labour camps in unimaginable conditions during WW2. Of course, as a child I had absolutely no understanding of the trauma and damage that can cause. She was an only child so perhaps all that trauma was focused on her.
@@hatjodelka That does sound like a horribly tragic story. Traumatized parents may also have had mental (and other) health issues. Sometimes surviving these unimaginable circumstances (family trauma) can cause people to live in "survival" mode, where all kindness, empathy is seen as "weakness" that in the past could have cost you your life... so it kind of gets squashed.
Time to turn to page 7 in our Potato Queen 🥔👑 songbook to "Next Petty" and follow along with our good friend Charlotte in our daily dose of good humour. We thank you Charlotte, many thanks!
Bullies CAN change. Doesn't happen often, but it does happen. One of my high school bullies became an ordained minister. Come to find out he had an abusive, alcoholic father. Now he ministers to disabled veterans at a local VA hospital.
You never forget the names of your school bullies and it can really affect your mental health as an Adult, I wish more bullies apologised later after finding out the trauma they really inflicted on you. An apology is the least they owe you. A genuine one, not one forced by others.
I was pretty awful to one of the guys I went to school with. I was really struggling mentally after a parental death. Having been on the bottom rung, I wound up feeling like I had to do anything to not continue on the bottom. That's not an excuse, just a reason. Anyway, I tried to apologise in our final year. He acceoted the apology, but I still said that if he wanted to take revenge someday, then I'd be okay with that. He was a better person than I was as a teenager, and is probably a better adult than I am (certainly happier than I am), which is probably the finest way of doing things. Hats off to you, F.C.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss at such a young age... I think it's ok to make mistakes and it's awesome and courageous that you admitted and figured out why you acted out like that.
I wouldnt say bullying and cheating is synonymous, being an asshole and not respecting others however is. It is a very obvious red flag of what to expect😂😅
I was bullied EXTENSIVLEY from 5th grade until I graduated. It started with kids following me home from school (we walked) and them throwing soda cans/bottles and rocks at me. Then grabbing me after school to hit or slap me. They would put pins, needles and tacks on my chair in class. They would spit on me. They called me every name you could think of, broke into my locker and stole a new leather jacket my mom worked all summer to buy me for fall. They tore up my things in my locker, my text books, notebooks etc. The chased me down halls, shoved me into classrooms, knocked me into the mud when it was raining.. At one point a group came to my house and told my mom, who opened the door, they were there to kick my a**. Even my mom thundering down on them didnt make them stop. They hit me in the face with books while on the school bus and wrote nasty words on my books and folders when I wasn't looking. I was so happy to graduate and get out of there and away from them. But, I never thought of being mean back to them, Cause then I would have just been like them. I never went to any class reunions, until our 25th where alot of people came up and hugged me an apologized. It was cathartic. I messaged a few on Facebook, asking , hey, why did you treat ,e like that in school? Responses were "Oh I was just a kid, and kids can be cruel" to "My parents were always fighting and got a divorce and I was miserable". Yeah, so were mine and my step dad beat the he** out of me. But no one knows whats going with you at home. Would that have stopped them? Made them nicer? Eh, doubt it. But, still I would never stoop to their level. Petty can be sweet in some circumstances, delicious even, but sometimes its better to hold your head high and move on.
I don't understand how school directors allowed this. My son was bullied in school 2 years ago, we took him out of school and changed twice before we found a decent one. But damn, the adults responsible for safety should be prosecuted for what happened to you 😢
Wow... you're a kind soul...too kind for those people...welp, after reading what you went through, I hope they at least get a bad karma...I hope you're ok now
8:33 The sad thing is many bullies end up going into careers/professions/jobs that let them have power over people, just like this bully did. Teachers, nurses, doctors, law enforcement, mental health professionals…it’s depressingly common. My own mother and sister are nurses and neither of them would EVER bully anyone else (my sister actually would defend victims from their bullies in high school), but yeah, for every amazing person with a sincere desire to help others, there’s a handful of bullies whose main desire is a having a ready supply of people to have power over. 💔
I found out there was a reunion for my old class (lower secondary school). I got bullied really bad those years and wanted to see if I would get an excuse from any of them. I joined the facebook group for the reunion and someone commented saying "Oh you can come if you want to." I wrote that I wouldn't be attending since those years left me with anxiety and pretty much destroyed my trust in other people. One of the worst bullies replied "Well if we were that awfull you properbly deserved it!" It had been 20 years, but I guess me just being me was still an issue. What started the bullying was me defending peoples right to love whomever they wanted to. I still stand by that and can only agree to people being bullies as kids rarely change.
I saw an apology from both of my bullies in school after many years, and it took me literally moving away from public school to independent study to finally see it. It took many years, and probably took much time for these two sisters, but both of them apologized to me for their treatment, and this went for years. -- Being Suspended, being treated poorly, being led on to be their 'friend' only to be left on blast (alone there to stand and question) and wonder what I did wrong. And realistically, I understood that at home drama can really effect how kids can treat others in school. They had so much pressure at home and I am happier for the apology, than none at all. And to this day, I still have one of the ex-bullies on my friend's list (rest in peace to the other ♥ sadly we lost the other to a tragedy) and I am happy to have the time to actually be their friend this time. They wanted to try again, genuinely. Sometimes, these bullies are trying for better.
As a former nurse, I can confidently state that nursing attracts some of the nicest people, but conversely some of the WORST! The bullying in nursing is crazy. The girl who bullied my sister in school became a nurse, and she became the manager of a mental health unit - a job she lost due to bullying her staff.
@@lgbestie It’s truly sad when those who choose a path of service encounter that kind of behavior; and I think it happens far too often. I loved nursing, but a colleague and I frequently seemed to get the most difficult patient assignments - those that often resulted in our having to play room tag where we’d get so many call lights that we’d often miss lunches and have to stay late to finish charting. Early in my career, a male nurse “Scott” told me there was no way that I always got the toughest assignments. However, “Smith” had a habit of falling asleep in the corner while charting. One day, a charge nurse said they wouldn’t give him difficult patient assignments, because they knew Scott wouldn’t provide the attention needed. We WERE actually getting the more difficult assignments - HIS. Additionally, a charge nurse admitted that didn’t give other charge nurses heavy patient loads because then she would receive an overly busy patient assignment from them. Thus, my colleague and I were constantly getting busier assignments to keep the non-charging charge nurses happy. *sigh*
Truth is, some bullys actually change over time. I was somewhat bullied in high school by three girls. Long story short, during this period of my life I was skinny, wearing glasses, very shy and insecure. So I admit, I was quite good victim material, and they chose me to be one. They on the other hand were what i call "corridor stars" - pretty, with high self esteem, fun, everyone wanted to be friends with them. It wasn't literally bullying, but they were making fun of me, looking for me between classes to shout for everyone to hear that they love me, that I'm man of their dreams and so on. It bothered me, but not much enough to do anything about it. I just sucked it up. 20 years have passed since our graduation, and someone came with an idea for a school reunion. I was excited, since I haven't seen most of my classmates ever since. And two of those girls also came to this event. And guess what, it was super cool to meet them. One of them, who contributed most to all that bullying stuff, came up to me, and asked me if we can talk privately. And she told me, that since she saw my name on the participants list, the memories of everything that they did to me came back to her. And she sincerely apologised, telling me that they were just young and dumb, and couldn't realize how bad their behavior was. I told her that I have zero hard feelings, that it was so long ago, I'm way beyond that, and basically we're 100% cool. We talked a lot after that, and this whole conversation was simply amazingly wholesome. We finally had an opportunity to draw a line, and leave it all behind. And I think that we both needed it, even if I never really thought about it. I'm so glad this happened, that I'm smiling just writing about this situation.
What happened to you was bullying. Im sorry you went through that but so glad you were able to face her and both be able to move on find some peace and closure. You didnt deserve what they did to you. Im glad to hear that youre okay. The end of your story is unfortunately not something that happens very often for people. I wish it did
This video keeps hitting home 😂 ***TL;DR**** My bully made amends with me in adulthood and I’m so grateful for that. I’ve shared this in the comments before on another video but my bully turned out to have a heart of gold in adulthood. He bullied me my entire freshman year of high school, starting out with some teasing that turned into a nightmare of constant ridicule, specifically over me having trichotillomania (compulsive hair pulling). Everything came to a stop when he was saying mean things to me during a school assembly (at the end of the school year), saying I’m annoying and to shut up etc. I slapped the fxck out of him and punched him a few times. He left me alone but after the assembly, and ended up moving schools after that year (not sure why) Fast forward 10 years, he walks by me while I’m at my job in a department store. He said hi, kept going but a little while later he circled back and gave me the most sincere apology I’ve ever heard. I apologized for resorting to violence, which he said I didn’t need to. It was something I had already made peace within myself, but having that experience in hindsight of childhood was the most incredible thing. Hadn’t heard from him much after, and he sadly passed away earlier this year. I pray he’s resting peacefully because whether or not we reconciled, he deserves to.
So, I had a group of bullies. But there is always one that leads the pack. From 3rd grade until my Junior year. I moved because I refused to graduate with these people. When I graduated, I moved out and had my own little house in a different town. Lo, and behold, there is the lead bully at my local grocer and he's working in the meat market. I pretended not to see him, but he saw me and called out my name. I took a deep breath, turned around, and greeted him. We were both 19. So, he apologized. He apologized for the years of torture. He admitted to things that he did that I only thought he did but never had proof. I don't know what caused him to apologize (yes, I accepted his apology because it was heartfelt). Flash forward to about 5 years ago and I ran into him again. Everything is as it should be with decades having passed since then. We are cordial. There is no animosity. I'm still curious as to why it was me that got picked on and why he apologized after graduation. I'm not curious enough to ask.
He probably apologized because he knew he was a dkhead with u and didn't want this bad karma to reach him. Maybe Why did he pick on you? They always pick on the silent ones. Different ones. Or who don't align with their non existent values.
They always pick the ones that are emotionally intelligent and empathetic. I like to think it's destiny making these choices, because these people are capable of forgiveness, so the bullies might have a shot at taking responsibility for their actions by making it right and grow from it.
@@spaceparrot8702 yes you're right about emotionally intelligent too. Empathetic and sensible people seem to be an easy target for them. Perhaps because they perceive sensitivity as weakness
@@miiim This, 100%. I forgot to mention this, but it's an important factor. Especially for men, because they are raised exactly to perceive sensibility and sensitivity as weaknesses. For narcissists, this is just their basic nature, regardless of gender.
I’ve been on such a low w my mental health again, I have CPTSD so it comes in waves and unexpectedly so I’m never prepared, but these videos have kept me from literal episodes, Charlotte your comedy and aura is perfection, ilysm
Charlotte, I think I am old enough to be your grandmother, but I have stopped watching you in the evening, because I CAN’T WAIT THAT LONG! I believe in forgiveness but not forgetting, but a bit of petty is just good for our well being, right? Love you, girl!
That last story was a doozy! I'm glad OP managed to get her petty revenge with no special actions, simply by living her best life! Great video, Charlotte!! ❤
A person I knew in college flipped the page and turned out to be a pathological liar, secret bully and scammer. She's slandered multiple people (randomly) in professional settings after college and has become outright verbally abusive to some of her "friends", even to the point of displaying psychotic tendencies publicly. She's now a child psychiatrist and it WORRIES me. I have no idea how any regulatory agency would let this psycho medicate vulnerable children in good conscience.
If you have evidence of her behavior, you can try reporting to the licensing board of the state she is in and the regulatory board can do an investigation to see if she is fit to practice. Not sure if you can report it anonymously, or if you want to go that far though.
14:18 God I loved that scene. Samantha wanted nothing to do with kids but she knew how important it was to Charlotte so she shared that rage over the name, if not she may have been MORE angry! She looked ready to fight that woman 😂
Charlotte, I just wanted to let you know, I think what you do is awesome. I found your videos a couple weeks ago and I literally watch one every morning to start my day off with a laugh. Thank you.
I got bullied through out my high-school life! For people who think these are too petty don't understand the after effects of bullying. Not only did they make horrible comments about my body they made up false stories and spread the lies to my whole grade I was disliked by almost everyone, nobody wanted to associate themselves with me because of those stories. Bullying is horrible, it has permanent effects.
I actually did have a bully apologize to me in high school. The friend, in this case, apologized multiple times. No pettiness here, but does about me that when I added her on Facebook, years later, that she put up a post, falling out because she thought she was #1 on my hit list. She clearly punished herself more than I ever could.
So sad and sorry for everyone who has experienced bullying and the resulting trauma. I had trouble processing my own main bully experience as the girl and I had been very close friends in elementary school. You know, where you decorate each other's notebooks, sit together for lunch, etc. The switch flipped when we hit high school. She and a pack of cronies picked at me mercilessly. Not physically, but psychological as is common. My clothes, my weight, my (high) GPA, etc. Leah Pyle, I've never forgotten you. I hope you're no longer a garbage can human.
That last story about the baby name I can relate to. Back in 2009-2010 I was friends with this girl for years now and got with my now husband. We went over to her house one night and got onto the conversation of if we ever had a baby what names we would pick and me not thinking, thinking I could trust her, I told her if I had a girl I was going to name her Raelyn but told her not to tell anyone and her response was I really like that name. Fast forward a few years, she becomes pregnant and we kinda lost touch but reconnected again via social media. That's where I seen she had a girl and literally named her Raelyn. Me surprised to see that and being me I commented under one of the photos and said Wow, love the name. Wonder what you're telling people when they ask where you came up with that name and spelling? She blocked me so she knows I know and she knows too. #Petty #BabyNameStealer #YouKnowWhoYouAreIfYouSeeThis
@@breannaflores4175 Well because of that I didn't name my daughter that although I wanted to. I came up with another unique name, named after my sister Ondrianna or Onna for short. My daughters name is Airiona, pronounced Air-e-onna so all in all, maybe it wasn't meant to name my daughter Raelyn after all. I just think it's funny now bc she blocked me so I know she knows I know. Never did I think that because we weren't really that close but hey it is a beautiful name after all so I can't blame her.
I never got any apologies from the many bullies I had in middle school and high school….but one of the girls who did it the most was very athletic all throughout school and I was a little heavier. A couple years ago, I saw her in Target and she had gained a lot of weight and I had recently lost weight and was looking really good. It was all the karma I needed to feel better about all of it 😂.
Unfortunately, most parents who used to be bullies won't learn until they have kids of their own being bullied. I've seen this way too many times. I used to get bullied a lot. I was a very pretty but quiet girl in school, well mannered and generally liked by the teachers due to my excellent behavior, and book smart. My own mom was a teacher in a different school, so I couldn't afford to get into trouble, not that I would want to. It's just how I was. But I got picked on SO MANY TIMES by girls (mainly due to jealousy and because I was "too nice", they'd also find ANYTHING wrong with me), harassed by boys (this one got out of hand), etc. My mom had to get involved many times, but I'll never forget the principal telling her that "boys will be boys" and "girls are just like that". My mom was LIVID. I've since learned to stand up for myself, I found my own voice, and man oh man, I was raring to punch someone in the throat if they touched me again (with my parents' blessing). Over the years, I occasionally check in on my bullies on social media and see how life treated them. One landed in jail for drug use, a girl got pregnant very early in her life and had multiple kids after, and I saw another complain about how her kid is getting bullied in school, literally asking for advice. I'm pretty sure karma is a thing. My mom used to tell me when I was younger, "Just wait and see what happens to them."
I’m 62 years old. I’ve been bullied in school my whole youth, and from my father, brother, and sister. Then my husband. I would NEVER put any person in this world through what I went through. I had to learn early in life that a leopard NEVER loses its spots. I even told my 3 children that through their lives. They thought I was just to rough on people. They also learned and realized through the years I was right. You are who you are from birth. There isn’t one person in this entire universe who could ever change my mind. People have to learn the hard way. It’s the only way. I had/have a life that 99% of people couldn’t even imagine. What I learned growing up served me well. People grow up? No, they just do it differently when they’re an adult.
That one about one of her bully's becoming a nurse specializing in mental health didnt surprise me. As someone who went to behavioral hospitals alot when I was younger, some of the RNs acted like high school mean girls. Its frustrating but I think its common for former high school bullies to suddenly go into the mental health profession. Why, I dont know, and not all of them, but a concerning amount.
Same reason a not-insignificant number of abusers become cops-- for the power that position gives them over other people. They get to bully other people, pass it off as 'care', and get *paid* for it on top of everything else.
It's a position of "power" over vulnerable people. That's why. They got off on it in school, so they want to relive it in their career. Same thing for guy bullies becoming cops or going into the military.
I honestly admire all the people that got revenge on their bullies, I never got that patience to even think of a rational plan; It was elementary school when I was bullied RELENTLESSLY by the WHOLE class, getting insulted about my weight, every little geture I had, getting pushed, kicked on the shins, and just coming home with my legs all scrached and bruised up (one kid in particular was the worst let's call him F) and neither my parents or teachers cared enough to give a shit. The thing is that it was SO MUCH that one day on class little 8 year old me SNAPPED, I saw nothing but bright red for a few moments, but when I snapped back I was grabbing F by the THROAT, I was choking him, his face was already getting somewhat purple and he was on his knees, I let go and looked around, THE WHOLE CLASS WAS IN SHOCK EVEN THE TEACHER WAS LOOKING AT ME LIKE IF I WAS A GHOST; I didn't get sent to detention cuz I was THE quiet kid so they just assumed I got hurt first and didn't do anything as usual. Anyhow, any time those little gremlins tried to bother me afterwards I always just snapped quickly and ran after them to choke them and slam them into the ground, all I can say is that it worked not only as a wake up call to not bully whomever but also they started to show me some basic respect and didn't get close to me when they noticed that I didn't care for getting in trouble if I drew blood 👺 Moral of the story?? I know the "mature thing to do" is not being violent and assaulting people but, honestly? I'D DO IT AGAIN AND EVEN FRACTURE SOME BONES TOO. The only thing I regret is not beating some sense into them SOONER, cuz as a kid you can get away with physical assault without a lawsuit 👹
I have had exactly ONE bully in my life come up to me and apologize. It really surprised me when he did it but I did appreciate it especially when he explained why he felt he picked on me during middle and high school. Some bullies can mature. For reference though, it was at my 20 year high school reunion , but to be fair I had skipped the other 3 reunions(5,10, 15) so he may have been waiting to apologize for a while.
I’ve had several bullies in each school I went to. What I still find fascinating is that this one bully in particular from high school was so mean to me and talked so much garbage about me to everyone yet NEVER KNEW ME on a personal level or even tried to. She tried to break my friendships up and even my first real boyfriend and I. I was a very shy Christian girl and was always friendly with everyone and stood up for others. Well flash forward 10 years and I’m out at a karaoke bar and one of my best friends happens to invite this bully out to hang out with us (without regard for how I would feel about it) and to my surprise, we were all laughing and having a good time. That is up until I hear her tell my best friend, “Candy’s ‘cool’ now!” I didn’t and still don’t know what she meant by that considering I have always been “cool” with people even her despite how she treated me back in high school. I never changed who I am. What bothers me is that she never even apologized for how she treated me and for all the lies she told others about me. She friend requested me a while ago on Facebook and I accepted, however, she never tries to talk to me, comment/like any of my posts. Makes me wonder why she friend requested me in the first place.
She did that to look good. The more friends the more popular she looks. Just unfriend her as she’s obviously not your friend. I got rid of a cousin on FB. She would come into Florida every winter. I would often travel past where she stayed when visiting another state and had mentioned several times we could meet up for lunch. Crickets. So I took her off my friends list. A year later she calls me and asks if everything is okay because she hasn’t seen me on Facebook. I said yes, everything is fine and got off the phone. 😊
It’s amazing how many schools dont really take a stand on bullying. My school didn’t do anything about my bullying. I was actually suspended on multiple occasions for something other people did and the school didn’t care. I physically got hit in the middle of gym class in front of the teacher and I was suspended because I stood up for myself and that’s what the teacher focused on not the fact that a male student just hit a female student in the face.
What's even worse is when the bully is the teacher, the school board and Principals/Superintendents are aware of it, but will not do anything about it, even with multiple complaints from both parents and students of those teachers who were being bullied.
My son was bullied in school because of Asbergers. I was in that school at least twice a week. They tried to punish him twice for standing up for himself, but when I threatened to go to the school board and MY ATTORNEY, they changed their minds. By the time he was in high school, it wasn't AS BAD. - The school would have just kept punishing him for being bullied if I hadn't been a karen! In the seventh grade, the assistant principle told me my son was talking about suicide, we got him a counselor outside of school, but I had my attorney call and speak to the principal - Funny thing is AFTER that the bullies were sent to another school as their punishment- The school was going to SUSPEND my son!
Hi Charlotte! I'm Mora from Argentina 🇦🇷. When my sister was in high school she was bullied by her 3 "friends". A couple of years later we saw a post on Facebook of one of these girls saying that she was studying for being an educational psychologist assistant and we were like "Excuse me, the audacity!!! What the hell is going on?!?" But hopefully, my sister move on. Also, when I was 8 and was in a catholic school the nuns there were awful persons. Mistreated kids psychological and some times the problem turned physical abuse like grabbing kids roughly by the shoulders and put them on the line when we were in formation. When my mom and some parents made the report to justice, the things turned the whole worse. My friends never talked to me again, I was left apart on games and groups. And even when the school authorities knew about the report, the kid's whose their moms made the report were brought out the classroom and we had to stood outside after they decided what to do with us. We were 6 kids (in the rage of 6 to 9 years old), the report never worked, anybody do anything, the nuns continued working like nothing, and the kids that were part of the problem were kicked out of that school (fun fact: the school phone called other schools from my neighborhood so none of them were giving us a vacancy). I know this is too long but need to say this, because in therapy I remembered a lot of things that unconsciously my mind just "forgot" to protect me. And it still hurting me. Thank you Charlotte for your amazing content ❤ (and also thanks to anyone who is reading this).
Can vouch, some childhood bullies turn into adult bullies. Some people never change. Believe it. Bless those who have changed! They usually take the change seriously afterward!
To be frank, any of those bullies could've sincerely apologized at any given time. It never crossed their minds. They never changed. Those who actually change would go out of their way to actually apologize no matter how long ago it was.
My mother always told me that by not forgiving someone and being angry you're only hurting yourself they're not out there upset about hurting you. You have to forgive for yourself and let go of the anger. Forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. Karma is a bitch.
Two things to always gatekeep, baby names and wedding plans. My mom had a family member "steal" her baby name for my brother so there were 2 kids close in age with the same name cause Mom wasn't going to change hers even though she gave birth 2nd. I had a "friend" who ended up using one of the wedding color schemes I'd talked about wanting long before either of us were planning a wedding.
I just found out recently .... Also gatekeep birthday party themes. I'm in the process planning a huge birthday party for my 60th in three years and made the huge mistake of telling someone about the particular theme and the event hall that has a glass stage that rises from the floor. The only event hall in Atlanta that has that specific feature. Yup. I found out they are copying the theme for this upcoming January 2024 and since we have many mutual friends who will attend when I do mine it will definitely looked like I copied this person. Lesson learned.
I used to be a bully in H.S. I used to walk past him and flick his ear, tell him I was gunna kick his butt after class, etc.. Then, one day, he came and sat next to me. I was so confused. He started talking to me, even more confusion. Then one day he asked me to spend the night. From that day forward, nobody picked on him. Guy was a genius, turned his bully into his friend.
@animetsystudio9841 he taught me a lot. That was 31 years ago. I'd think I grew up in that time. I think it was because I had no control in my life and was bullied myself in middle school.
@memorysdancer after him, I never bullied anyone else. Turned out 'Dave' was a cool guy, and I wish I had stayed in contact after H.S. you know how ppl go their separate ways.
Bullies can change indeed. Few years back, maybe when I was 35ish, I was chatting on FB on a post about bullying and we were all kinda sharing our experiences. The next day I came to work, already having forgotten about that post. My colleague - literally the sweetest, nicest, most friendly, happy to help whenever needed, always the first in line to give you a hug and/or make you laugh when he saw you needed it, top husband/boyfriend material kind of guy (ngl, many of us had a secret little crush on him lol) - turned to me (we were sitting next to eachother) and said "I am sorry Kathi." I looked at him confused, thinking he did something work related and messed up and asked him, wide eyed "For what?!?" "I read your comment from yesterday about your bullies. I want to apologize that you had to go through that. I was a bully at high school and did most of the things you described to my classmates too, and more. I really just wanted to tell you I am sorry." And he hugged me. I sh!t you not, I cried. I never heard anything even remote to an excuse or remorse from anyone who ever bullied me or actually hurt me. But from a guy that came from across Europe, who didn´t even know I exist 2 years prior? And just FYI, he stayed with us for a year or two after that and for everything I saw him do and say, I can 1000000000000% guarantee if he ever was a bully, he changed. 180 degrees.
One of my bullies became a teacher and ended up being a principal at the high school we both attended. Makes me so angry to think of her as a principal and dealing with kids. She was so unaware of what it felt like to be treated badly.
When a friend of a bully just stands there and lets trauma happen they are just as bad as the bully themselves. The friend could’ve stopped the bullying at any time. They didn’t. They just stood there and laughed. As a person who has been bullied all her life, mostly for my mental disabilities (Autism, ADD) that went undiagnosed for years because science hadn’t caught up yet, I can relate to this. Only ONE person apologized for traumatizing me and that was after getting in trouble with a couple of teachers and my mom. This was on a school trip where my mom offered to go along as a chaperone. I was sleeping on the bus with my headphones on listening to music. This person stealthily unplugged my headphones and plugged them into his one portable CD player (This was 2000 when we still used CDs and portable CD players) he cranked the volume and I woke up to the sound of rock music. A bunch of people around me laughed. I told them very angrily that it wasn’t funny and there was no way that I could convince the otherwise. Even though I was 19, I still took my jacket and pulled it over my head and had a little cry. When i told my mom and the other teachers about it at our next pit stop, mom guided me through a whole Grounding process so i could calm down. I don’t know who talked to him, but during our next touristy place that we got to he pulled me aside and apologized. I forgave him and said “Let’s just put this behind us and enjoy the rest of the trip.” I am glad that this person was a good enough person to apologize to me instead of going through the bully cycle and making this worse Bully Cycle: 1) Bully does something to traumatized victim 2) Victim goes to authority figure (Parent, Teacher, Coach, Police Officer etc.) 3) Authority figure goes to Bully and asks them to stop traumatizing victim 4) Bully goes to victim and says something like “You got me in trouble. I’m going to make your life a living hell from now on.” 5) Victim goes silent 6) When Authority figure approaches victim to check in and see if they are ok, Victim just smiles and tells them that everything is ok 7) Authority figure thinks “The system works. All is well with the world” 8) Bully continues to make victim’s life a living hell I think I would have a better time forgiving a bully’s friend rather than the bully themselves. Most of the time the friend wouldn’t know what to say or do in the moment other then point and laugh. Either that or the traumatic event was so out the the blue that the friend is in shock and the only thing they can think of to do is laugh.
One of my classmates in our small HS was badly teased and bullied all thru HS. These days he’d probably be diagnosed with Asperger’s but way back then he was just kind of smart but weird. I didn’t participate in the bullying but didn’t do anything to stop it. (I didn’t really have the status to influence in any case.) When we graduated he told me I was the only friend he had all during HS. Honestly I was a little embarrassed that the weird kid thought I was his friend. It took some years to realize how sad it was that he thought a friend was some who had only civil interactions with you but at least didn’t bully you. But I was also glad he thought he had at least one friend.
Who doesn't love some petty revenge? I Love it, especially in this Channel because Charlotte's hilarious reactions makes everything even better. Actually it's because of Charlotte ICONIC reactions i watch every vídeo at least 3 times. She's the best. Petty FOREVER.♥️😂👑
I was bullied horribly in the 8th grade. I was the new girl in class. It was mainly this one girl that was the ringleader, but she had a posse and everyone else was afraid of them. It was a year of torture. The next year I was expecting another year of it, but people started talking and apologizing for not speaking to me last year. That’s when I realized I didn’t see ringleader. She was sent to the Catholic school. One day a friend told me ringleader got a job at McDonalds with her and she wanted to talk to me. I was nervous because all those feelings from 8th grade were coming up. I gathered up my teenage courage and went to talk to her. You could have knocked me over with a feather when she apologized to me. I guess she had an epiphany? I don’t know. No revenge needed. She was really sincere. It still hurts to think about that year, but I’ve forgiven her for it.
Honestly, that first one, that…That was a good deed. OP saved that lady from a horrendous marriage bound to fail. Good for OP. ❤
sometimes i wonder if they are fake or not
Honestly, he cheated within an hour of talking to some stranger, what makes you think he's going to be loyal in all the years of your marriage?
She saved the fiancée too!
Exactly what I came here to say. She did the bully a favour by doing that.
Yeah, I get that catfishing is horrible, but if the dude literally jumped at the chance for an online side piece in less than 20 minutes, it's not too much. He would have cheated with a real girl, probably already had some one night stands up until this point. Will he do the same thing behind his next girlfriend's back? Yes, I think he will.
I'm 66, and I live in a senior apartment complex. Being one of the younger people 😮 am shocked at the bullying that goes on here. There are 2 women here who were definitely bullies in their younger years. You're absolutely right, Charlotte. If you're a bully as a kid, you'll be a bully forever. It was a shocking revelation.
My goodness talk about drama on your doorstep! 😢 I hope they don't bully you 💜🖤💜
I'm 60 and the youngest owner in my senior complex and have also lived in here the longest of everyone. I burst out laughing at your comment... because it's so true! We have quite a few bullies living here... although now a days... I just call them all Karen.😂 I have 2 serious chronic illnesses and the Karen's continue to bully and harrass me to serve on the strata council. I know my limits and such a task would cause relapses in my illnesses... and I have worked too hard and too long to recover to the point I am at now. These are the type of people who have bullied a woman whose sister passed away here.... into replacing a hallway carpet at the cost of $10,000 because her movers supposedly ruined it. Ah the joys of community living.... NOT!!
Some people truly never grow up. Be kind to people (including the awful ones), and everyone will get to see for themselves how awesome you are. ☺️
you're so right I'm 26 and stupidly thought high school drama would end once I became a real adult, I was WRONG
When I was a kid I used to think that old people were just nice and sweet. And then my mom told me that sometimes young mean people grow up to be old mean people just cuz someone's old doesn't mean they're sweet.
Have to admit that I did some petty revenge myself, I was bullied through the whole of high school after leaving for university I was out with my sister on a night out in my hometown, I bumped into one of my bullies from school who obviously did not recognise me.. I let him buy me drinks all night letting him think that I liked him. I waited till the end of the night and when he asked if I was going home with him I dropped my name and then explained that the drinks all night (expensive ones) would be some small way to apologise for the hell he and his friends caused me for years!
That is freaking awesome good for you! F them bullies, I also had guys years later after school try talking me up, like damn you might not remember all the hurt you caused me but I sure do..Have fun living the rest of your life knowing you peaked in high school! 🫡
YASSSSSS!!! Thank you sir, may I have ANOTHER!!! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼🏆🏆🏆🥂🥂🥂
My petty revenge is NOWHERE near yours (which is epic btw) but in middle school some girl was being so mean to me. So when everyone left for recess, I went into her backpack and found a bottle of lotion. I undid the cap and put it back upside down to slowly leak out.
What happened after you said that?
@@randomcommenter7170 he stood goldfishing as I walked away lol
I talked with a girl I went to high school with after she sought out my mom and got my number and she told me I was the only good thing about high school and to thank me for treating her so well and making her feel like she had a real friend. I had no idea what she was talking about because I don’t recall doing anything special, I truly liked her. But apparently I was her comfort and she has never forgotten me and inviting her to my 16th birthday meant the world to her 🥺 We stay in touch now.
You never know how you will impact someone’s life, so treat everyone well!
That's so sweet! You really changed someone's life for the better. You thought it was nothing, but it shows how our behaviour can make a huge difference to someone.
I was a noon supervisor at my local school yrs ago and I was nice, fair and I was amicable with the kids vs just an authority figure. Anyway, one kid, well he is like 22 now, just msgd me to say thank you for always being uplifting and positive, that's its really helped him ❤
Absolutely
My bullies from school literally tried to get in my pants as a adult. The audacity!!!
Absolutely not!
Oh Hell nah!
ABSOLUTELY NOT
NOOOOO
😮
9:09 I got an apology from one of my bullies. He actually wrote me a very lengthy message and explained how in therapy it made him realize how mean he was towards me. He even sent a message to my parents apologizing to them as well for putting me through hell and hurting them as he made derogatory comments to them too. He grew and for my well being and his I forgave him as did my parents. It was a shock that he sent the message but I am glad he did. One less suitcase of trauma to unpack
Awesome!!❤
Thank goodness! Also I like your pickle icon.😊
@@Wendylovespitties thank you. I love pickles and fits my personality. Salty and sweet. 🤣
That is really awesome! It sounds like he wasn't prompted to apologize and wasn't trying to get something out of it. You can usually tell when an apology isn't genuine but this one does sound like it really is. Some people can change for the better.
@@dragonfliesnh4204 Absolutely. It was like he finally had seen the error in his ways and wanted to make amends. It felt good to let go of some of my emotional baggage.
One of my elementary school bullies apparently saw me at a plasma donation center where she was working. She messaged me a few days after my visit on social media explaining to me that she was frightened to approach me because she wasn’t sure how I would’ve reacted. She apologized for all of the many many many years of torture, including the horrible nickname that followed me until my graduating day . she said that she now has multiple children and that she would never want them to go through what she put me through. This interaction happened some years ago and I don’t remember if I accepted her apology.
Forgive if you are generous enough but never forget! The bully inside of them will always remain.
The fact that they're coming directly to you means they did change. It takes a lot of courage to accept your past mistakes. That doesn't change the trauma you went through and you don't have to accept the apology of course, I just mean that this kind of bully doesn't have an agenda and I'd be much more likely to forgive them personally :)
There's a difference between "I'm sorry for what I did to you" and "I'm sorry, I was young and stupid"
The tragic part about being bullied is that it ends up effecting our self esteem, self worth, and overall personality. The way we react to situations as we get older are effected by all that bullying. An apology is appreciated, but it doesn’t change the outcome.
My elementary school, straight through all of high school nemesis became one of THEE greatest, kindest most generous people that I've ever known. In fact, we both became mothers pretty young (20) & THAT is what changed her _whole entire_ personality, for the better. We're still _very_ close personal friends to this very day, all these 27 _years_ later. People can & do change. However, I've found that it's _usually_ when they are still pretty young though. Parenthood can do it too, sometimes.
I love that baby name story! It reminds me of a story I saw on Reddit once. The OP had a sister who was always trying to steal the spotlight and outshine her. When OP and her husband were pregnant, the sister was pregnant too, and due before OP. OP/hubbie had a name picked out that was a unique name and was in honor of a member of his family (I think an uncle who had passed?). The sister was pestering her for what name she had picked, and as a joke/test, she and hubbie made up an awful, old-fashioned name and told sis that was their pick, and the meaningful story behind it (the true story, but fake name). Well, surprise, surprise, when sister gives birth, she announces on SM that they named their new baby . Sister even sent OP a message saying no hard feelings, but it's not like they owned the name. OP/hubbie said nothing. When their baby was born, they made their announcement with the real name, sharing the story behind it. Many of hubbie's family commented on it, understanding the sentiment behind it, and applauding them. Sister obviously knew she had been played, and started blaming OP that it was her fault sis's baby was now stuck with an awful name (that her partner had apparently hated from the beginning, but she gave him no say). I think the sister ending up legally changing it. It was the best kind of petty!
Love your story, babe. Sister wanted a name she got a name. lol
Fabulous.
I remember that story! That pettiness was glorious!
@nenamichelle 👏👏👏
I gate kept every name after my first born until we knew the gender. Good friend and I were pregnant at the same time told her that if I had a boy it was going to be caiden and a girl it was caidence. Low and behold she had her baby shower gender reveal party. I went and she announced baby cadence. I was pissed/annoyed. Cadence was the only girl name I ever liked. Luckily, a month later, I found out i was having a boy and named him caiden. Never shared another name, ever.
5:58 The bully becoming a mental health nurse just reminds me of one of mine, who used to randomly tell me dead baby jokes like they were the funniest thing in the world, becoming a midwife. I can't imagine what I'd say if they were assigned me if I got pregnant.
Dude My step mother was trying to become a psychologist, and she was maybe a semester into school when she tried to tell my mom she wasn't bi-polar even though an actual licensed psychologist diagnosed her. Also the same woman who told me as a young impressionable child (like 4-5) that if I jumped off the roof and believed hard enough, I could fly. Thankfully I wasn't that fucking stupid and never tested it. Yeah...and she has another kid now....hope the kid's ok.
The "posting about my bullies" story really hits home, because my bullies did similar, albeit more (and worse). Encouraged me to end myself, called me fat and ugly, took my food, physically and s*xually abused me, etc. using the excuse "my family is poor and my home life is hard" for doing so. The worst one goes to Harvard now and wants to be a lawyer. I could scream. 🙃
That really sucks, I hope you are doing okay now.
Some people can only feel good about themselves by attempting to destroy others... sorry this happened to you too.
Sorry that happened to you! I'll never understand how people can be so mean.
I genuinely hope you are doing better now.
I'm so sorry that happened to you, you did not deserve that, nobody does. I would bet good money you have not been their only victim
You should see how long sexual harassment can be gone after in your state. Obviously there are ways to keep this person out of the legal profession.
I was bullied all the way through elementary school. Summer before high school I got extremely I’ll, almost died and in the process lost weight. I was not obese, but overweight by about 25 lbs. My attitude completely changed after I almost died. First day of high school when my 2 main bully’s started picking on me in home room I beat the crap out of them. Note I am 5’4 female and then 95 lbs, they were 5’9 and 5’11 and guys. I even shocked myself. After that I did not become a bully, but by golly when people bullied others I was the first to put the bully’s in their place. My mom and dad were not as thrilled as the school office became their new home. 🤷♀️ Through the years I have had many people from school say I helped them make high school bearable and for that I am so proud. And now at 66 I still do not let people walk all over me. I may be small but I am resilient.
You feel like Batman? I was also bullied in elementary school and also became a defender of victims when I entered junior high school. It feels so good to do what I wished someone did for me, and I've seen it gives strength to the ones you helped to the point where they can fight alone next time and the bullying stops.
You served justice, thank you for your service. They deserved to be put in their place if they feel the need to go out of their way to berate someone, slay queen! 💅🏻✨ Whenever someone picks on me I either give them the death glare or ignore them out of existence. Always gives me satisfaction when they don’t get the reaction they wanted, too bad. I may be fat but I’m not as stupid as they are. I’m not gonna let a bunch of nobodies decide to deem me the “#1 person no one would want to date” (that’s unfortunately stuck with me since 4th grade but thankfully I’m in 12th grade now so one more year to go) I cannot wait to write my senior quote and maybe get some sweet petty revenge on my number one bully 😈 we need more people like you in this world
@@crystalhopkins9340mg! Get on the year book team and distroy them👏🤓😂🥰
Yay! That is Alanna energy.
Awesome!
If he was going to send nudes, flirt and sext with someone else when engaged, its probably best for her to have found out its highly possible it would happen for real, or has happened before without her knowledge. So well, i dont think it was too much. He fucked up, he took the bait. He shouldve ignored it or told the 'woman' off and shoeed his fiance immediately.
For all intents and purposes it did happen “for real”. We don’t find out if he revealed it was him
A guy who bullied me in middle school so aggressively I would go home crying. My mom made me join cheerleading because her motto was, 'If you can't beat em, join em.' We were "friends" for like a year. As adults, he hit me up like 2 years ago. He had lost his football playing physique. He asked, "How come we never hang out?" I asked, "How come you bullied me so badly growing up?" He blocked me immediately. 🤣🤣🤣🤣 it felt so good!
His reaction to your question just shows he hasn't changed at all.
@thevintagecatnsw Oh exactly, aside from his looks, he can no longer skate by on. He is exactly the same. He could have apologized or talked it out, but he didn't.
Sounds like the type of guy to be a POS to a girl in school till she blooms then suddenly wants to hook up so he can use you as a toy and mistreat you.. trash assholes like that don't deserve a pretty girl like you to even bother talking to them. Reach for the stars and never look back.
He probably thought that since y’all were friends for a year after he bullied you that y’all were cool. He should’ve apologized instead of blocking you.
Now that is awesome😅 ur mums saying is a lot like my dads one "love your enemies, you'll make them crazy"
When I was a 1st year student Nurse, I was really badly bullied by an Enrolled Nurse (this was in the UK). The same Enrolled Nurse also bullied my friend, a 3rd year Student Nurse, named Liz. It got to the point that we were both seriously considering giving up our careers, as going to work was an absolute nightmare. Two months later, we moved to other wards, but never forgot the awful time, we’d had. Fast forward a few years and both Liz and myself became Nurse Tutors. Many Enrolled Nurses then took the opportunity to do the conversion course to become Registered Nurses. When a particular group started, all of the education staff went into the classroom to introduce ourselves. Well the Nurse who’d bullied us, looked at me and went a whiter shade of white, she then scanned the other faces and saw Liz! I seriously thought she was going to pass out, she clearly remembered how she’d treated us and had no idea, how we would behave towards her! We obviously behaved completely professionally and treated her in exactly the same way as everyone else. However, I think she seriously learned a lesson in that moment!
A horrible bully of mine in a college costuming class--we'll call her Laura--decades later went on to do an entire painting series against bullying! I found her on Facebook and messaged her about the irony of THAT but I doubt she ever saw it. Seriously, she was jealous of my art and several other things, I figured out later. The thing that really got me was that she turned the whole class against me (it was a small class). I hope you are reading this Laura C.
I was bullied by this girl from kindergarden to 5th grade. Somedays we were friends next day she would call me crazy & there was no way she would be friends with me. I was bullied by her for my weight, glasses, my home life & the very fact that my dad was not around. Fast forward into our late 20s, I had reconnect with an old friend from that school years after leaving the state. This friend was also friends with the bully & had sworn she had changed, & to at least hear her out. So I did. The bully dm'd me on facebook with a massive message. Turns out, life outside of school for her was much worse than mine. ( this doesnot justify her actions) She was being hurt at home in ways I could never image. Even though my most vivied memory of her was at breakfast in kindergarden when she showed us the new trick her dad had taught her. How to give a hickey. Long story short, she is in therepy for things and her therepist told her she needed to apologize to me, but didn't know where I was until our friend found me. She asked if were could be friends & I was honest, I said no, I will forgive her for the past but I cant forget what she had done. She was not fully ok with this but understood my reasoning behind it.
Good for you! You were generous enough to forgive her. Never forget though.
That's very sad. I'm sorry for what she did to you, and I'm glad you forgave her, and it's completely reasonable that you don't want anything to do with her.
I also pity her a lot. She was being sexually abused. That's a kind of trauma no one should have. Sadly she took out her anger, frustration, confusion and hurt on you. And turning you into another victim. It was the only control she had in her life - hurting you. When she called you crazy, she was feeling crazy. When she was friends with you it was probably the good days for her. When she wasn't - I don't want to imagine what happened to her.
I hope you found some closure in talking to her. I hope that you can one day truly move on from that time and forget it. I know a lot of people say forgive but never forget. But forgetting is a part of healing, memories fade. It's a natural part of life. The sweetest times of our lives become distant, vague memories kept alive by pictures and videos. It should also be the same for painful memories. Many times it's not. Remembering those times is a lot like hanging onto a branch wanting to wash away with time, and refusing to let go.
So I hope that you can one day forget as well. Truly move on from that horrible time of your life. I'm so sorry this happened to you.
GOOD ON YOU BABES
Apologies might fade, tbh, it's kinda sad but what she did, didn't have to be reflected on you.
How perfectly awful for the both of you. I admire your diplomb.
Her actions may be a case of horizontal violence. My guess is that as a child she was powerless to stop the abuse. She could not confront this adult who was treating her so badly. Because she was trapped she lashed out at another vulnerable child, ie she dealt with her over-whelming hurt by hurting you.
What a tragic situation for both of you.
Storytime. I was bullied a lot as a kid, but it got particularly malicious in junior high. Six years ago, when I had just gotten out of detox and walked into drug rehab at one of the lowest points in my life, I almost walked right back out. The first patient I saw happened to be a girl who had spent our years in junior high tormenting me. I hoped maybe she wouldn't recognize me, but as we made eye contact, it was obvious that she did. She lit up, told me that I looked familiar, and asked my name. I told her. "I REMEMBER YOU!", she exclaimed.
The next morning at the daily house meeting, a staff member introduced me, and asked for a volunteer to be my "buddy". My bully's hand shot up, and I just wanted to crawl into a hole and die.
As the days passed, she was so sweet and kind to me. I thought that perhaps my memories of her in junior high were somehow skewed.
One day I walked into the dining room, and saw her sitting by herself. I walked over to the table, and sat down across from her. "Can we talk?", I asked. She looked at me knowingly and said, "Is this about me bullying you in school?" My jaw dropped. I figured that either things didn't happen the way I had perceived them, or that she truly didn't remember how she had treated me. I was dumbfounded, but I nodded.
What followed was one of the greatest gifts I have ever received.
She explained to me that she was very aware of how badly she had treated me and others. She told me that at the time, she was struggling in life. She said that school was very difficult for her. She told me that she wasn't intelligent, that she felt awful about herself, and had no self worth. She explained to me that to try and hide the fact that she wasn't smart, that she bullied others as a distraction from herself, and to make others as miserable as she herself felt.
She apologized sincerely to me, and related that now she was a mother of a son who was being bullied. She explained that seeing it from a mother's standpoint had been such irony, and devastating to her. She realized that she had put others through the same pain that her son was now going through.
I walked out of rehab not only clean and sober, but with a new perception of my past. I was able to forgive those people who had bullied me, and that forgiveness set me free.
@@MsJubjubbird Hold up, when did I say it's okay for bullies to walk all over anyone? I was sharing my experience, from my point of view, and that's it. There was no need to be rude about it.
So very happy for you !
You're an awesome writer.
Oh no. She maybe gets a pass. Maybe. But the other bullies? Not without a sincere apology from each individual. She may have changed. But the others? Nope.
Yeah I think that guy who took revenge on the bully in that story was justified. Because to me it wasn't really revenge. The bully still had to CHOOSE to ruin his own life. He still had to CHOOSE to be a terrible person. He still had to CHOOSE to disrespect his partner and relationship. If he had just ignored the DM's or immediately deleted them then the revenge wouldn't have happened. The revenge was predicated on him being a terrible person. If he had changed and was a good person nothing would have happened. And to me that's what makes it the best.
“Let’s inflict trauma on people and then they will come to us to fix their trauma.”
Miss Charlotte just defined modern politics!
Yesss!! I had an ex who would say terrible about women being lesser or say condescending things to me but ended studying to be a gynecologist. I thought that was ironic.
@@rra7490 the poor patients
I was thinking the same thing!!
The baby name story reminded me so much of what happened to my dad when he was born. My grandmother had decided on the name Merle for him (it was a different time) and she told the wife of her husband's cousin about it. Now, this cousin was not a very bright woman, her lack of brains was quite famous in our family, and she immediately stole the name and gave it to her own son, oblivious to the fact that the two babies were cousins and would have the same last name. So my grandmother wound up calling my dad Merlyn (yes, with a Y) instead. Thing is, even that was too close, because when my own mother went to marry my dad, a whole bunch of people thought she was not marrying a nice guy named Merlyn, but the rather simple minded Merle (he took after his mother in all the worse ways). Heck, even this last year, my mom had to point out the difference between the two cousins when she went to her high school reunion, as people had apparently spent decades thinking she married the idiot of the family.
😂😂😂
The legacy😂
I found out that my cousin was pregnant just a week or so around the time I was ready to announce my pregnancy. By the time we found out we were having a boy (she was too) my partner and I decided to name our baby after his late grandfather. We were still deciding on a middle name but were set on the first. I get a text from my cousin asking about my baby’s name. One of the 2or 3 names she was choosing between was very similar to our name. Seeing as how we had decided, I told her our name and the reason for it. She proceeded to tell me she was leaning toward another name but the husband liked the name because it was the name of one of his favorite actors. Her baby was due first so I think you can see where this is going. I get another text from her as her pregnancy is coming to a close. She starts asking me if we plan on having any more children and asking if I wouldn’t want to name my baby after my partner seeing how it’s our first child blah blah blah. Like what? I told her we weren’t sure if we would be having more or what their names would be but we were set on this name. Anyway her baby was born first and she gave him the similar name and now anytime we are all together they’re both being called by the same nickname 🤷🏼♀️what can you do?
😂
@@weecheetoburritolol that must be annoying though
My sister was my bully up until I was 16 and she left home, she was still horrible for a few more years; even a decade later, now that she's gone to therapy and learned and is supposedly different, I still won't believe it until I see it myself. Even though I always knew that she was lashing out because she externalises her pain (I internalise), it never made it feel any less awful every single day; and I was also dealing with the bullshit from our parents that made her lash out.
I can't remember who said it, but its true that "Your trauma isn't your fault, but it is your responsibility"; I don't care if someone is hurting, it doesn't make it okay to traumatise another person because of that.
My sister is 51 freakin years old & I'm 47, but she's the same villain I've been tormented for almost 5 decades. I hope for her own sake (and yours) that she's been humbled & genuinely treats you well. My sister did everything in her power to turn our mother against me, so I've been without family for nearly 5 yrs. 😢 Alone is sometimes better.
@@Lorian7748GenXr I hope so too, I don't want her to be unhappy, but it takes a lot longer to regain trust once its been lost.
I'm sorry about your sister, its really not fair, I hope you've found peace with not having them in your, and that you have some great friends.
I don't get how people think that sibling bullying is any better or more okay than by someone outside the family.
I hope therapy is helping your sister. It's good for her to take that step. However, the amount of contact with her is totally up to you. You've been traumatized. You also need time to heal. Do not let anyone guilt or bully you into anything sooner. Work on your time and draw sturdy boundaries, babes. May you have peace of mind.
I actually got revenge on the only person who bullied me while still in high school. This was the 80's and everyone was afraid of "devil worshipping cults". My best friend and one of my other friends were a bit ..... witchy. One actually became a wiccan later but back then they were just more goth. Me, I leaned to the preppy side :)
Anyhow, my bully started a rumor that we were witches and had done all this stuff. I suppose we were dancing in the moonlight naked or something in their minds, which is about as far from the truth as you could get. I was raised in a very strict, Christian household. Well one day my friend, who was a drama queen, acted like we were fighting then bursts out of a classroom and does this thing with her hands and says stuff in a made up language and points at me so I act like she threw me into the lockers and I tell her how sorry I am for upsetting her and I wont do it again if she'll just let me go (I think I stole her soda or something equally dumb). She then looks at the other girl who had bullied us all who was standing near me at the time and says "so, you're conspiring with them against us? I'll teach her a lesson and you too if you do it again". Points at her wiggling her fingers and saying more mumbo jumbo. The girl actually thought she put a spell on her. It was HILARIOUS !! She followed me around for days begging me to ask Jen to take it off and swore to others everytime anything happened to her it was because of "the curse".
Finally one day I told her she was the only one who could remove it. She had to simply be kind to everyone and it would go away but if she was mean again, it would come back doubly bad.
Amazing how people can change on a dime when they think they have been cursed
Ah yes, good old fashioned Headology. Sir Pratchett would approve
Wait wait wait if your friend later became a Wiccan, then what if they have been witches in past lives and subconsciously knew spells and actually did curse your bully lmao imagine
You made me take out my glasses for this and I'm glad I did!
Now its "cool" or definitely more acceptable to be Wiccan, so not sure if you could use that same tactic today, awesome story though!!
I remember all the drama and mass panic over Satanic cults. According to a book I read not once was there any evidence of people being sacrificed for the devil, animals unfortunately, so not sure how that started
Instead of Satanism nowadays it seems like the focus is on trans and Disney, so bizarre !
Cool emojis !!
It's so strange to me that so many people brush off bullies as being immature & kids being kids. I remember always trying to befriend the kids i saw bullied to show them not everyone is that way & to make sure they felt included & cared about. Even in kindergarten, there was only 1 boy of color in our school & he was very very overweight for his age. Nobody played with him or spoke to him. Kids wouldn't pick him in teams & things.I remember specifically playing with him every day so he'd have a friend & not feel so alone. I continued to do this all the way through school & i still do it to this day. I'm not telling this story to brag or get a pat on the back. I'm telling it bc it's what makes me question others being bullies getting by with it & excuses made for them. If i had this kind of empathy as young as i did, how can so many people dismiss bullies as kids being kids?
It's super sad it's being labelled "kids are kids" and even called just bullyin. If adults would do the same to other adults, co-workers what kids and teens are allowed to do each other and be brushed off as"it's just being kid/ bullying" ... The adults would be charged and in court.
Kids from young age can learn bullying and violence are wrong. There's no excuse that "they don't know better" they do. But they are just not held responsible.
I got bullied 6 years, from age 10 to 16, i was called names, i was spit on, i was beaten, pushed down stairs, i was told to go k#** myself... And the most angry i was at teachers. They mostly laughed, especially when bully and target were opposite gender so they labelled it always as "crush"
The most anger i get when I see my former teachers.
At 16 was time to go next education, change of school and i went different direction than others. It was mostly okay, one bully appeared.. she was always asking rides and such, then kept writing hateful, insulting messgaes on school guestbook because me and friend were admins (time when social media wasn't a thing and guestbooks were).
Funnily she kept writing her hatemessages from her bf's computer and his internet had same IP so simple search gave me his name and i knew.
One day at lunch someone asked me if i knew who it was. I just said aloud (i knew bully was eating behind me) that messages showed IP and it's type of IP that's easy to track so i know exactly.
That ended there.
That bully is emt now.
I have not seen anyone else from childhood. If i do, i just act like I don't know who they are.
One childhood bully was strange.. she actually stopped as teen. Ofc never apologized but yeah.
More kids should be like you when you were younger😢❤
My friend group and i do this, we had one kid eating completely alone across the cafeteria and my best friend saw him and just stood up, walked over, and asked if he wanted to join us. Fortunately the teachers let him move tables(this was in middle school and we all had assigned seats in lunch). Turns out he was one the THE FUNNIEST kids we've ever met, and always had something to say to make people laugh. Unfortunately he(and most kids at our table) kept getting bullied and harassed, most of us were a little overweight or something else about us people didn't like(*cough* gay *cough*). He ended up being framed for having a hit list and the principal said the school wasn't safe for him anymore so he had to change schools, I hope he made new friends though
@@taylabatchelder7175 why had the school assigned him to be alone? So many teachers don't show any empathy or care for kids being bullied. It seems they wanna stay out of it to keep good graces with entitled bullies parents. It's sad.
@@hayleymariemills nah the assigned seats happened in the middle of the year(kids were being goofy and would get in trouble so this was punishment), he got bullied out of his old table and moved to an empty one before they happened. The teachers told him that his seat would be there unless he wanted to move to another table, but he wanted to sit alone in fear that he would get bullied again. Thankfully he accepted my friend's offer to sit with us so he wasn't alone anymore.
Honestly, every time Charolette mentions her bullies I am just stunned. This woman is an absolute light. A pleasure, a beacon of joy and laughter, just an overall wonderful gift of a person. I adore her. So I simply cannot wrap my head around anyone ever being mean to my precious petty Queen.
Ikr😢
That's WHY
I am a nurse and the best day of my career was when I went into work and saw that one of my patients for that day was my high school bully 😃
I went into her room to “ introduce myself”as her nurse for the day and the look on her face was priceless BUT what was even better was that she had gained at least 60 to 70 lbs. since high school, she worked as a cashier at a dollar store because she dropped out of college to help her fiancé get his degree and then they got married but her husband ( the popular guy from high school) had left her for a friend of hers and now she’s a sad single mom. Karma will find you one day so be kind to each other 💁🏼♀️
Yeah, Petty Women should absolutely NOT be Nurse's. Your screen name is equally disgusting for a healthcare provider. 🤢
Absolutely LOVED the post that got even with those bullies! They were going to work with helpless animals and people with mental health problems! You did your country a HUGE favor.
I was bullied in school from the time I was four until the time I was 18, only one of the bullies ever apologize. He did this maybe three or four years after high school, but I found out 10 or 15 years later, when he was dating my boss at the time that he would still laugh about the stuff that they did to me and brag about it to her and other people. Just goes to show that, even though they apologize, does not necessarily mean that they regret their choices.
4:52 I felt such warmth in my heart and even said aww, when I saw the message " The potato army is very nice though :) Charlotte, that is so sweet. Hope ya know how much you mean to us and all the work you do.
I appreciate you!!
May bullies never experience any peace for as long as they have not apologised for the pain they have inflicted on us.
Such a cheerful, and witty human!
Who else loves Charlotte's energy✋✋😊😊
The eye winking 🤩
I had several bullies in junior high b/c I was fat. One of them, I frankly approached him and asked him why he bullied me so much. We talked, and he actually quit. About 11 years ago, I was on Facebook for a while and found my other 2 bullies. Surprisingly, we were actual 'adults' and were able to just shoot the sh*t. So, you never know how it can turn out.
I had a bully that got in touch with me 30 years later and said he wanted to apologize for the way he treated me. We became good friends. 20 years later, he passed away, and I miss him.
There was a notorious and vicious bully at my school. Kids had nightmares about her. Parents complained about her. A kind friend invited her to her birthday party and she made the other kids and the birthday girl cry. When I was about 20 there was a piece about her in the local paper. She had hanged herself. Over 40 years later I still think of how terribly unhappy she must have been and I wonder if her home situation was abusive.
I never got an apology from any of my bullies, but I did find out why, eventually, and the ridiculous, silly reason for it. Evidently, they felt jealous of me for some reason that was so far from the truth that it was laughable to even think about. I did get some "revenge" when I went to a class reunion and saw those who had bullied me for my weight had all grown bigger bellies than I had ever had and were raging drunks besides.
@@hatjodelka I think you might be right... kids that act out all the hatred and abuse they experience at home...
@@moonhunter9993 It may go back further than that. Both her parents were Polish Catholic refugees who had been in forced labour camps in unimaginable conditions during WW2. Of course, as a child I had absolutely no understanding of the trauma and damage that can cause. She was an only child so perhaps all that trauma was focused on her.
@@hatjodelka That does sound like a horribly tragic story. Traumatized parents may also have had mental (and other) health issues. Sometimes surviving these unimaginable circumstances (family trauma) can cause people to live in "survival" mode, where all kindness, empathy is seen as "weakness" that in the past could have cost you your life... so it kind of gets squashed.
Time to turn to page 7 in our Potato Queen 🥔👑 songbook to "Next Petty" and follow along with our good friend Charlotte in our daily dose of good humour. We thank you Charlotte, many thanks!
You're the best!
Lol ❤❤!!
Darlin, YOU ARE! Don't you forget it. Thank you for another video. We loves this!
It's true that we really do love you Charlotte.
You put a smile on my face every day 😁
Ah-aaah-ahhh-amen
(In Catholic mass this is how they would sing "amen" at least when I was a kid in Catholic school)
Bullies CAN change. Doesn't happen often, but it does happen. One of my high school bullies became an ordained minister. Come to find out he had an abusive, alcoholic father. Now he ministers to disabled veterans at a local VA hospital.
You never forget the names of your school bullies and it can really affect your mental health as an Adult, I wish more bullies apologised later after finding out the trauma they really inflicted on you. An apology is the least they owe you. A genuine one, not one forced by others.
I was pretty awful to one of the guys I went to school with. I was really struggling mentally after a parental death. Having been on the bottom rung, I wound up feeling like I had to do anything to not continue on the bottom. That's not an excuse, just a reason. Anyway, I tried to apologise in our final year. He acceoted the apology, but I still said that if he wanted to take revenge someday, then I'd be okay with that. He was a better person than I was as a teenager, and is probably a better adult than I am (certainly happier than I am), which is probably the finest way of doing things. Hats off to you, F.C.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss at such a young age... I think it's ok to make mistakes and it's awesome and courageous that you admitted and figured out why you acted out like that.
I wouldnt say bullying and cheating is synonymous, being an asshole and not respecting others however is. It is a very obvious red flag of what to expect😂😅
I was bullied EXTENSIVLEY from 5th grade until I graduated. It started with kids following me home from school (we walked) and them throwing soda cans/bottles and rocks at me. Then grabbing me after school to hit or slap me. They would put pins, needles and tacks on my chair in class. They would spit on me. They called me every name you could think of, broke into my locker and stole a new leather jacket my mom worked all summer to buy me for fall. They tore up my things in my locker, my text books, notebooks etc. The chased me down halls, shoved me into classrooms, knocked me into the mud when it was raining.. At one point a group came to my house and told my mom, who opened the door, they were there to kick my a**. Even my mom thundering down on them didnt make them stop. They hit me in the face with books while on the school bus and wrote nasty words on my books and folders when I wasn't looking. I was so happy to graduate and get out of there and away from them. But, I never thought of being mean back to them, Cause then I would have just been like them. I never went to any class reunions, until our 25th where alot of people came up and hugged me an apologized. It was cathartic. I messaged a few on Facebook, asking , hey, why did you treat ,e like that in school? Responses were "Oh I was just a kid, and kids can be cruel" to "My parents were always fighting and got a divorce and I was miserable". Yeah, so were mine and my step dad beat the he** out of me. But no one knows whats going with you at home. Would that have stopped them? Made them nicer? Eh, doubt it. But, still I would never stoop to their level. Petty can be sweet in some circumstances, delicious even, but sometimes its better to hold your head high and move on.
I don't understand how school directors allowed this. My son was bullied in school 2 years ago, we took him out of school and changed twice before we found a decent one. But damn, the adults responsible for safety should be prosecuted for what happened to you 😢
I am so sorry for you ❤ love from France 🇫🇷
I'm so sorry you had to go through that...
@@delphmew3331they never really care much
Wow... you're a kind soul...too kind for those people...welp, after reading what you went through, I hope they at least get a bad karma...I hope you're ok now
Lol the last one. Psychological warfare. That girl went insane without OP having to do anything really 😂
Charlotte, I totally and completely agree with you… bullies don’t change once they are adults.
8:33 The sad thing is many bullies end up going into careers/professions/jobs that let them have power over people, just like this bully did. Teachers, nurses, doctors, law enforcement, mental health professionals…it’s depressingly common.
My own mother and sister are nurses and neither of them would EVER bully anyone else (my sister actually would defend victims from their bullies in high school), but yeah, for every amazing person with a sincere desire to help others, there’s a handful of bullies whose main desire is a having a ready supply of people to have power over. 💔
I was having similar thoughts. That FB post probably saved some vulnerable people from terrible abuse.
Karma is real… she comes back and when she does she hits HARD.
Once my situation gets resolved I CAN NOT WAIT to tell my petty story.
We can't wait to read about it!! ❤
Sing like a canary baby!
@@samanthamelendez8851 oh… I will!!! 🩵🩵🩵
@@lisamelroy2855 🩵🩵🩵🩵
And we'll all be here to hear about it!😅❤
I found out there was a reunion for my old class (lower secondary school). I got bullied really bad those years and wanted to see if I would get an excuse from any of them. I joined the facebook group for the reunion and someone commented saying "Oh you can come if you want to." I wrote that I wouldn't be attending since those years left me with anxiety and pretty much destroyed my trust in other people. One of the worst bullies replied "Well if we were that awfull you properbly deserved it!" It had been 20 years, but I guess me just being me was still an issue. What started the bullying was me defending peoples right to love whomever they wanted to. I still stand by that and can only agree to people being bullies as kids rarely change.
"Well if we were that awfull you properbly deserved it!" WHAT A FCKING A**HOLE!!! I'm sorry that you have to go through that again.
Yeah, don’t tell those people your trauma bc they will use it against you. Clear lack of empathy & very malignant people.
Those people sound awful, I'm sorry you had to go through that
I saw an apology from both of my bullies in school after many years, and it took me literally moving away from public school to independent study to finally see it. It took many years, and probably took much time for these two sisters, but both of them apologized to me for their treatment, and this went for years. -- Being Suspended, being treated poorly, being led on to be their 'friend' only to be left on blast (alone there to stand and question) and wonder what I did wrong.
And realistically, I understood that at home drama can really effect how kids can treat others in school. They had so much pressure at home and I am happier for the apology, than none at all. And to this day, I still have one of the ex-bullies on my friend's list (rest in peace to the other ♥ sadly we lost the other to a tragedy) and I am happy to have the time to actually be their friend this time. They wanted to try again, genuinely.
Sometimes, these bullies are trying for better.
As a former nurse, I can confidently state that nursing attracts some of the nicest people, but conversely some of the WORST! The bullying in nursing is crazy. The girl who bullied my sister in school became a nurse, and she became the manager of a mental health unit - a job she lost due to bullying her staff.
Nursing: The only career where the old eat their young.
You are so right! That's why I left medical Assisting. MY first job soured me due to the catty bitchy bullshit from other women
@@lgbestie It’s truly sad when those who choose a path of service encounter that kind of behavior; and I think it happens far too often. I loved nursing, but a colleague and I frequently seemed to get the most difficult patient assignments - those that often resulted in our having to play room tag where we’d get so many call lights that we’d often miss lunches and have to stay late to finish charting. Early in my career, a male nurse “Scott” told me there was no way that I always got the toughest assignments. However, “Smith” had a habit of falling asleep in the corner while charting. One day, a charge nurse said they wouldn’t give him difficult patient assignments, because they knew Scott wouldn’t provide the attention needed. We WERE actually getting the more difficult assignments - HIS. Additionally, a charge nurse admitted that didn’t give other charge nurses heavy patient loads because then she would receive an overly busy patient assignment from them. Thus, my colleague and I were constantly getting busier assignments to keep the non-charging charge nurses happy. *sigh*
Truth is, some bullys actually change over time. I was somewhat bullied in high school by three girls. Long story short, during this period of my life I was skinny, wearing glasses, very shy and insecure. So I admit, I was quite good victim material, and they chose me to be one. They on the other hand were what i call "corridor stars" - pretty, with high self esteem, fun, everyone wanted to be friends with them. It wasn't literally bullying, but they were making fun of me, looking for me between classes to shout for everyone to hear that they love me, that I'm man of their dreams and so on. It bothered me, but not much enough to do anything about it. I just sucked it up.
20 years have passed since our graduation, and someone came with an idea for a school reunion. I was excited, since I haven't seen most of my classmates ever since. And two of those girls also came to this event. And guess what, it was super cool to meet them. One of them, who contributed most to all that bullying stuff, came up to me, and asked me if we can talk privately. And she told me, that since she saw my name on the participants list, the memories of everything that they did to me came back to her. And she sincerely apologised, telling me that they were just young and dumb, and couldn't realize how bad their behavior was. I told her that I have zero hard feelings, that it was so long ago, I'm way beyond that, and basically we're 100% cool. We talked a lot after that, and this whole conversation was simply amazingly wholesome. We finally had an opportunity to draw a line, and leave it all behind. And I think that we both needed it, even if I never really thought about it.
I'm so glad this happened, that I'm smiling just writing about this situation.
Singling you out, making fun of you, and mocking you in front of other students really IS literally bullying.
What happened to you was bullying. Im sorry you went through that but so glad you were able to face her and both be able to move on find some peace and closure. You didnt deserve what they did to you. Im glad to hear that youre okay. The end of your story is unfortunately not something that happens very often for people. I wish it did
This video keeps hitting home 😂
***TL;DR**** My bully made amends with me in adulthood and I’m so grateful for that.
I’ve shared this in the comments before on another video but my bully turned out to have a heart of gold in adulthood.
He bullied me my entire freshman year of high school, starting out with some teasing that turned into a nightmare of constant ridicule, specifically over me having trichotillomania (compulsive hair pulling). Everything came to a stop when he was saying mean things to me during a school assembly (at the end of the school year), saying I’m annoying and to shut up etc. I slapped the fxck out of him and punched him a few times. He left me alone but after the assembly, and ended up moving schools after that year (not sure why)
Fast forward 10 years, he walks by me while I’m at my job in a department store. He said hi, kept going but a little while later he circled back and gave me the most sincere apology I’ve ever heard. I apologized for resorting to violence, which he said I didn’t need to. It was something I had already made peace within myself, but having that experience in hindsight of childhood was the most incredible thing. Hadn’t heard from him much after, and he sadly passed away earlier this year. I pray he’s resting peacefully because whether or not we reconciled, he deserves to.
So, I had a group of bullies. But there is always one that leads the pack. From 3rd grade until my Junior year. I moved because I refused to graduate with these people. When I graduated, I moved out and had my own little house in a different town. Lo, and behold, there is the lead bully at my local grocer and he's working in the meat market. I pretended not to see him, but he saw me and called out my name. I took a deep breath, turned around, and greeted him. We were both 19. So, he apologized. He apologized for the years of torture. He admitted to things that he did that I only thought he did but never had proof. I don't know what caused him to apologize (yes, I accepted his apology because it was heartfelt). Flash forward to about 5 years ago and I ran into him again. Everything is as it should be with decades having passed since then. We are cordial. There is no animosity. I'm still curious as to why it was me that got picked on and why he apologized after graduation. I'm not curious enough to ask.
He probably apologized because he knew he was a dkhead with u and didn't want this bad karma to reach him.
Maybe
Why did he pick on you? They always pick on the silent ones. Different ones.
Or who don't align with their non existent values.
They always pick the ones that are emotionally intelligent and empathetic. I like to think it's destiny making these choices, because these people are capable of forgiveness, so the bullies might have a shot at taking responsibility for their actions by making it right and grow from it.
@@spaceparrot8702 yes you're right about emotionally intelligent too.
Empathetic and sensible people seem to be an easy target for them. Perhaps because they perceive sensitivity as weakness
@@miiim This, 100%. I forgot to mention this, but it's an important factor. Especially for men, because they are raised exactly to perceive sensibility and sensitivity as weaknesses. For narcissists, this is just their basic nature, regardless of gender.
I’ve been on such a low w my mental health again, I have CPTSD so it comes in waves and unexpectedly so I’m never prepared, but these videos have kept me from literal episodes, Charlotte your comedy and aura is perfection, ilysm
Crosses your name out of my book with the title "people to kill." Best scene of a really funny movie. Buscemi absolutely crushed that role.
Charlotte, I think I am old enough to be your grandmother, but I have stopped watching you in the evening, because I CAN’T WAIT THAT LONG! I believe in forgiveness but not forgetting, but a bit of petty is just good for our well being, right? Love you, girl!
That last story was a doozy! I'm glad OP managed to get her petty revenge with no special actions, simply by living her best life! Great video, Charlotte!! ❤
That's the best revenge, IMO, to live well, without wasting energy and time on even thinking about them.
@@elalogar7340 Exactly! ❤️
A person I knew in college flipped the page and turned out to be a pathological liar, secret bully and scammer. She's slandered multiple people (randomly) in professional settings after college and has become outright verbally abusive to some of her "friends", even to the point of displaying psychotic tendencies publicly. She's now a child psychiatrist and it WORRIES me. I have no idea how any regulatory agency would let this psycho medicate vulnerable children in good conscience.
If you have evidence of her behavior, you can try reporting to the licensing board of the state she is in and the regulatory board can do an investigation to see if she is fit to practice. Not sure if you can report it anonymously, or if you want to go that far though.
@@Pokey1234That is probably a good idea
If you report her, you may be saving others who are too scared to speak up
14:18 God I loved that scene. Samantha wanted nothing to do with kids but she knew how important it was to Charlotte so she shared that rage over the name, if not she may have been MORE angry! She looked ready to fight that woman 😂
Charlotte, I just wanted to let you know, I think what you do is awesome. I found your videos a couple weeks ago and I literally watch one every morning to start my day off with a laugh. Thank you.
Same!!😊
When you're at the level of pettiness where you don't have to do much, it's amazing.
The way you slapped yourself on the wrist made me appreciate you even more. That was very self-reflective of you. You're a treasure. Never change. ♥
I got bullied through out my high-school life! For people who think these are too petty don't understand the after effects of bullying.
Not only did they make horrible comments about my body they made up false stories and spread the lies to my whole grade I was disliked by almost everyone, nobody wanted to associate themselves with me because of those stories. Bullying is horrible, it has permanent effects.
The last one is a great example of simply living well as the best revenge!
I actually did have a bully apologize to me in high school. The friend, in this case, apologized multiple times.
No pettiness here, but does about me that when I added her on Facebook, years later, that she put up a post, falling out because she thought she was #1 on my hit list. She clearly punished herself more than I ever could.
So sad and sorry for everyone who has experienced bullying and the resulting trauma. I had trouble processing my own main bully experience as the girl and I had been very close friends in elementary school. You know, where you decorate each other's notebooks, sit together for lunch, etc. The switch flipped when we hit high school. She and a pack of cronies picked at me mercilessly. Not physically, but psychological as is common. My clothes, my weight, my (high) GPA, etc. Leah Pyle, I've never forgotten you. I hope you're no longer a garbage can human.
That last story about the baby name I can relate to. Back in 2009-2010 I was friends with this girl for years now and got with my now husband. We went over to her house one night and got onto the conversation of if we ever had a baby what names we would pick and me not thinking, thinking I could trust her, I told her if I had a girl I was going to name her Raelyn but told her not to tell anyone and her response was I really like that name. Fast forward a few years, she becomes pregnant and we kinda lost touch but reconnected again via social media. That's where I seen she had a girl and literally named her Raelyn. Me surprised to see that and being me I commented under one of the photos and said Wow, love the name. Wonder what you're telling people when they ask where you came up with that name and spelling? She blocked me so she knows I know and she knows too. #Petty #BabyNameStealer #YouKnowWhoYouAreIfYouSeeThis
The fact Raelyn is also on my list of future baby names 😂😂
@@breannaflores4175 Well because of that I didn't name my daughter that although I wanted to. I came up with another unique name, named after my sister Ondrianna or Onna for short. My daughters name is Airiona, pronounced Air-e-onna so all in all, maybe it wasn't meant to name my daughter Raelyn after all. I just think it's funny now bc she blocked me so I know she knows I know. Never did I think that because we weren't really that close but hey it is a beautiful name after all so I can't blame her.
I never got any apologies from the many bullies I had in middle school and high school….but one of the girls who did it the most was very athletic all throughout school and I was a little heavier. A couple years ago, I saw her in Target and she had gained a lot of weight and I had recently lost weight and was looking really good. It was all the karma I needed to feel better about all of it 😂.
Unfortunately, most parents who used to be bullies won't learn until they have kids of their own being bullied. I've seen this way too many times.
I used to get bullied a lot. I was a very pretty but quiet girl in school, well mannered and generally liked by the teachers due to my excellent behavior, and book smart. My own mom was a teacher in a different school, so I couldn't afford to get into trouble, not that I would want to. It's just how I was. But I got picked on SO MANY TIMES by girls (mainly due to jealousy and because I was "too nice", they'd also find ANYTHING wrong with me), harassed by boys (this one got out of hand), etc. My mom had to get involved many times, but I'll never forget the principal telling her that "boys will be boys" and "girls are just like that". My mom was LIVID. I've since learned to stand up for myself, I found my own voice, and man oh man, I was raring to punch someone in the throat if they touched me again (with my parents' blessing). Over the years, I occasionally check in on my bullies on social media and see how life treated them. One landed in jail for drug use, a girl got pregnant very early in her life and had multiple kids after, and I saw another complain about how her kid is getting bullied in school, literally asking for advice.
I'm pretty sure karma is a thing. My mom used to tell me when I was younger, "Just wait and see what happens to them."
Revenge is always best served cold☺️
I’m 62 years old. I’ve been bullied in school my whole youth, and from my father, brother, and sister. Then my husband. I would NEVER put any person in this world through what I went through. I had to learn early in life that a leopard NEVER loses its spots. I even told my 3 children that through their lives. They thought I was just to rough on people. They also learned and realized through the years I was right. You are who you are from birth. There isn’t one person in this entire universe who could ever change my mind. People have to learn the hard way. It’s the only way. I had/have a life that 99% of people couldn’t even imagine. What I learned growing up served me well. People grow up? No, they just do it differently when they’re an adult.
That one about one of her bully's becoming a nurse specializing in mental health didnt surprise me. As someone who went to behavioral hospitals alot when I was younger, some of the RNs acted like high school mean girls. Its frustrating but I think its common for former high school bullies to suddenly go into the mental health profession. Why, I dont know, and not all of them, but a concerning amount.
Same reason a not-insignificant number of abusers become cops-- for the power that position gives them over other people. They get to bully other people, pass it off as 'care', and get *paid* for it on top of everything else.
you can do a whole video on hospital nurse bullying. 100%
It's a position of "power" over vulnerable people. That's why. They got off on it in school, so they want to relive it in their career. Same thing for guy bullies becoming cops or going into the military.
I honestly admire all the people that got revenge on their bullies, I never got that patience to even think of a rational plan; It was elementary school when I was bullied RELENTLESSLY by the WHOLE class, getting insulted about my weight, every little geture I had, getting pushed, kicked on the shins, and just coming home with my legs all scrached and bruised up (one kid in particular was the worst let's call him F) and neither my parents or teachers cared enough to give a shit.
The thing is that it was SO MUCH that one day on class little 8 year old me SNAPPED, I saw nothing but bright red for a few moments, but when I snapped back I was grabbing F by the THROAT, I was choking him, his face was already getting somewhat purple and he was on his knees, I let go and looked around, THE WHOLE CLASS WAS IN SHOCK EVEN THE TEACHER WAS LOOKING AT ME LIKE IF I WAS A GHOST; I didn't get sent to detention cuz I was THE quiet kid so they just assumed I got hurt first and didn't do anything as usual.
Anyhow, any time those little gremlins tried to bother me afterwards I always just snapped quickly and ran after them to choke them and slam them into the ground, all I can say is that it worked not only as a wake up call to not bully whomever but also they started to show me some basic respect and didn't get close to me when they noticed that I didn't care for getting in trouble if I drew blood 👺
Moral of the story?? I know the "mature thing to do" is not being violent and assaulting people but, honestly? I'D DO IT AGAIN AND EVEN FRACTURE SOME BONES TOO. The only thing I regret is not beating some sense into them SOONER, cuz as a kid you can get away with physical assault without a lawsuit 👹
1:36 I would agree with you. If he had FAKED anything that would be pure evil, but he just let the bully ruin himself with the bully's OWN evil.
Time for our daily dose of Charlotte to make our days better!!
Yes!!!!
Yes indeed. I so enjoy Charlotte and all the Potatoes!!!❤
The ukulele on the wall hits different now. Thanks Colleen!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
It’s always when the bully gets bullied that they… maybe… realize how terrible they were! Keep living your best life Charlotte, you’re beautiful 💕
I have had exactly ONE bully in my life come up to me and apologize. It really surprised me when he did it but I did appreciate it especially when he explained why he felt he picked on me during middle and high school. Some bullies can mature. For reference though, it was at my 20 year high school reunion , but to be fair I had skipped the other 3 reunions(5,10, 15) so he may have been waiting to apologize for a while.
I’ve had several bullies in each school I went to. What I still find fascinating is that this one bully in particular from high school was so mean to me and talked so much garbage about me to everyone yet NEVER KNEW ME on a personal level or even tried to. She tried to break my friendships up and even my first real boyfriend and I. I was a very shy Christian girl and was always friendly with everyone and stood up for others. Well flash forward 10 years and I’m out at a karaoke bar and one of my best friends happens to invite this bully out to hang out with us (without regard for how I would feel about it) and to my surprise, we were all laughing and having a good time. That is up until I hear her tell my best friend, “Candy’s ‘cool’ now!” I didn’t and still don’t know what she meant by that considering I have always been “cool” with people even her despite how she treated me back in high school. I never changed who I am. What bothers me is that she never even apologized for how she treated me and for all the lies she told others about me. She friend requested me a while ago on Facebook and I accepted, however, she never tries to talk to me, comment/like any of my posts. Makes me wonder why she friend requested me in the first place.
She did that to look good. The more friends the more popular she looks. Just unfriend her as she’s obviously not your friend. I got rid of a cousin on FB. She would come into Florida every winter. I would often travel past where she stayed when visiting another state and had mentioned several times we could meet up for lunch. Crickets. So I took her off my friends list. A year later she calls me and asks if everything is okay because she hasn’t seen me on Facebook. I said yes, everything is fine and got off the phone. 😊
It’s amazing how many schools dont really take a stand on bullying. My school didn’t do anything about my bullying. I was actually suspended on multiple occasions for something other people did and the school didn’t care. I physically got hit in the middle of gym class in front of the teacher and I was suspended because I stood up for myself and that’s what the teacher focused on not the fact that a male student just hit a female student in the face.
My school did the same thing, they only suspended the bullies only for two weeks
What's even worse is when the bully is the teacher, the school board and Principals/Superintendents are aware of it, but will not do anything about it, even with multiple complaints from both parents and students of those teachers who were being bullied.
My son was bullied in school because of Asbergers.
I was in that school at least twice a week. They tried to punish him twice for standing up for himself, but when I threatened to go to the school board and MY ATTORNEY, they changed their minds. By the time he was in high school, it wasn't AS BAD.
- The school would have just kept punishing him for being bullied if I hadn't been a karen! In the seventh grade, the assistant principle told me my son was talking about suicide, we got him a counselor outside of school, but I had my attorney call and speak to the principal - Funny thing is AFTER that the bullies were sent to another school as their punishment- The school was going to SUSPEND my son!
yup, same here
@@Aurora3242I went through much the same thing with my son who is also an Aspie. 🤗
Best part of my day, when I get a Charlotte notification 😊
Hi Charlotte! I'm Mora from Argentina 🇦🇷. When my sister was in high school she was bullied by her 3 "friends". A couple of years later we saw a post on Facebook of one of these girls saying that she was studying for being an educational psychologist assistant and we were like "Excuse me, the audacity!!! What the hell is going on?!?" But hopefully, my sister move on.
Also, when I was 8 and was in a catholic school the nuns there were awful persons. Mistreated kids psychological and some times the problem turned physical abuse like grabbing kids roughly by the shoulders and put them on the line when we were in formation. When my mom and some parents made the report to justice, the things turned the whole worse. My friends never talked to me again, I was left apart on games and groups. And even when the school authorities knew about the report, the kid's whose their moms made the report were brought out the classroom and we had to stood outside after they decided what to do with us. We were 6 kids (in the rage of 6 to 9 years old), the report never worked, anybody do anything, the nuns continued working like nothing, and the kids that were part of the problem were kicked out of that school (fun fact: the school phone called other schools from my neighborhood so none of them were giving us a vacancy).
I know this is too long but need to say this, because in therapy I remembered a lot of things that unconsciously my mind just "forgot" to protect me. And it still hurting me.
Thank you Charlotte for your amazing content ❤ (and also thanks to anyone who is reading this).
no one could ever hate you charlotte! you are stunning, talented, funny, smart and successful! we adore you!
slapping yourself after laughing about the failed engagements going "BAD CHARLOTTE" lmao I love you
The silent claps and the Austin powers pinkie 🤣🤣🤣💀💀
Can vouch, some childhood bullies turn into adult bullies. Some people never change. Believe it.
Bless those who have changed! They usually take the change seriously afterward!
To be frank, any of those bullies could've sincerely apologized at any given time. It never crossed their minds. They never changed.
Those who actually change would go out of their way to actually apologize no matter how long ago it was.
I never forgave my bullies, why should I afford them the mercy they never afforded me? I told them all the go kick rocks and never contact me again.
@@corsaircarl9582 You don't have to forgive your bullies. I think they should have the decency to apologize for their behavior but sadly many do not.
@@mxm7647 even if they do apologize I tell them to screw off
@@corsaircarl9582 Which is fine.
the one with the mean girls and stopping their careers in the degrees they had made me cry so hard. i felt every part of her misery.
My mother always told me that by not forgiving someone and being angry you're only hurting yourself they're not out there upset about hurting you. You have to forgive for yourself and let go of the anger. Forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. Karma is a bitch.
Two things to always gatekeep, baby names and wedding plans. My mom had a family member "steal" her baby name for my brother so there were 2 kids close in age with the same name cause Mom wasn't going to change hers even though she gave birth 2nd. I had a "friend" who ended up using one of the wedding color schemes I'd talked about wanting long before either of us were planning a wedding.
I just found out recently ....
Also gatekeep birthday party themes. I'm in the process planning a huge birthday party for my 60th in three years and made the
huge mistake of telling someone about the particular theme and the event hall that has a glass stage that rises from the floor. The only event hall in Atlanta that has that specific feature.
Yup.
I found out they are copying the theme for this upcoming January 2024 and since we have many mutual friends who will attend when I do mine it will definitely looked like I copied this person.
Lesson learned.
I used to be a bully in H.S. I used to walk past him and flick his ear, tell him I was gunna kick his butt after class, etc.. Then, one day, he came and sat next to me. I was so confused. He started talking to me, even more confusion. Then one day he asked me to spend the night. From that day forward, nobody picked on him. Guy was a genius, turned his bully into his friend.
I hope now you changed urself.
Did you guys get married?
This is kinda wholesome.
Edit: Very Gandhi- like.
@animetsystudio9841 he taught me a lot. That was 31 years ago. I'd think I grew up in that time. I think it was because I had no control in my life and was bullied myself in middle school.
@memorysdancer after him, I never bullied anyone else. Turned out 'Dave' was a cool guy, and I wish I had stayed in contact after H.S. you know how ppl go their separate ways.
Honestly, im so happy i found this channel 😂. This is my new guilty pleasure! Don't ever stop finding these amazing stories and share them!
Sameeee girl!!!
Bullies can change indeed. Few years back, maybe when I was 35ish, I was chatting on FB on a post about bullying and we were all kinda sharing our experiences. The next day I came to work, already having forgotten about that post. My colleague - literally the sweetest, nicest, most friendly, happy to help whenever needed, always the first in line to give you a hug and/or make you laugh when he saw you needed it, top husband/boyfriend material kind of guy (ngl, many of us had a secret little crush on him lol) - turned to me (we were sitting next to eachother) and said "I am sorry Kathi."
I looked at him confused, thinking he did something work related and messed up and asked him, wide eyed "For what?!?"
"I read your comment from yesterday about your bullies. I want to apologize that you had to go through that. I was a bully at high school and did most of the things you described to my classmates too, and more. I really just wanted to tell you I am sorry." And he hugged me.
I sh!t you not, I cried. I never heard anything even remote to an excuse or remorse from anyone who ever bullied me or actually hurt me. But from a guy that came from across Europe, who didn´t even know I exist 2 years prior? And just FYI, he stayed with us for a year or two after that and for everything I saw him do and say, I can 1000000000000% guarantee if he ever was a bully, he changed. 180 degrees.
One of my bullies became a teacher and ended up being a principal at the high school we both attended. Makes me so angry to think of her as a principal and dealing with kids. She was so unaware of what it felt like to be treated badly.
When a friend of a bully just stands there and lets trauma happen they are just as bad as the bully themselves. The friend could’ve stopped the bullying at any time. They didn’t. They just stood there and laughed.
As a person who has been bullied all her life, mostly for my mental disabilities (Autism, ADD) that went undiagnosed for years because science hadn’t caught up yet, I can relate to this. Only ONE person apologized for traumatizing me and that was after getting in trouble with a couple of teachers and my mom. This was on a school trip where my mom offered to go along as a chaperone. I was sleeping on the bus with my headphones on listening to music. This person stealthily unplugged my headphones and plugged them into his one portable CD player (This was 2000 when we still used CDs and portable CD players) he cranked the volume and I woke up to the sound of rock music. A bunch of people around me laughed. I told them very angrily that it wasn’t funny and there was no way that I could convince the otherwise. Even though I was 19, I still took my jacket and pulled it over my head and had a little cry. When i told my mom and the other teachers about it at our next pit stop, mom guided me through a whole Grounding process so i could calm down. I don’t know who talked to him, but during our next touristy place that we got to he pulled me aside and apologized. I forgave him and said “Let’s just put this behind us and enjoy the rest of the trip.” I am glad that this person was a good enough person to apologize to me instead of going through the bully cycle and making this worse
Bully Cycle:
1) Bully does something to traumatized victim
2) Victim goes to authority figure (Parent, Teacher, Coach, Police Officer etc.)
3) Authority figure goes to Bully and asks them to stop traumatizing victim
4) Bully goes to victim and says something like “You got me in trouble. I’m going to make your life a living hell from now on.”
5) Victim goes silent
6) When Authority figure approaches victim to check in and see if they are ok, Victim just smiles and tells them that everything is ok
7) Authority figure thinks “The system works. All is well with the world”
8) Bully continues to make victim’s life a living hell
I think I would have a better time forgiving a bully’s friend rather than the bully themselves. Most of the time the friend wouldn’t know what to say or do in the moment other then point and laugh. Either that or the traumatic event was so out the the blue that the friend is in shock and the only thing they can think of to do is laugh.
One of my classmates in our small HS was badly teased and bullied all thru HS. These days he’d probably be diagnosed with Asperger’s but way back then he was just kind of smart but weird. I didn’t participate in the bullying but didn’t do anything to stop it. (I didn’t really have the status to influence in any case.) When we graduated he told me I was the only friend he had all during HS. Honestly I was a little embarrassed that the weird kid thought I was his friend. It took some years to realize how sad it was that he thought a friend was some who had only civil interactions with you but at least didn’t bully you. But I was also glad he thought he had at least one friend.
I loved when Charlotte went Nature Boy on that line at 10:28 lol
Chef's kiss 💋 to all these stories
Who doesn't love some petty revenge? I Love it, especially in this Channel because Charlotte's hilarious reactions makes everything even better. Actually it's because of Charlotte ICONIC reactions i watch every vídeo at least 3 times. She's the best. Petty FOREVER.♥️😂👑
Forever!!!!!!
Petty revenge court sounds like something Charlotte would do. Does the pettiness fit the crime? Let Judge Charlotte decide!
I’m stuck in the hospital your videos make my day, thank you Charlotte. 😊
Feel better soon!! ❤
@@lisamelroy2855 Thank you. ❤️
Feel better soon, TaterTot!❤
Revenge is so satisfying
😄 I love the eye blink notes! 😂🤣
Katie & Becky are just mean girls, the ultimate bullies.😡🤬🤬 Love you Charlotte.❤❤
I was bullied horribly in the 8th grade. I was the new girl in class. It was mainly this one girl that was the ringleader, but she had a posse and everyone else was afraid of them. It was a year of torture. The next year I was expecting another year of it, but people started talking and apologizing for not speaking to me last year. That’s when I realized I didn’t see ringleader. She was sent to the Catholic school. One day a friend told me ringleader got a job at McDonalds with her and she wanted to talk to me. I was nervous because all those feelings from 8th grade were coming up. I gathered up my teenage courage and went to talk to her. You could have knocked me over with a feather when she apologized to me. I guess she had an epiphany? I don’t know. No revenge needed. She was really sincere. It still hurts to think about that year, but I’ve forgiven her for it.