To touch on the story about the guy who commented on what the victim was wearing when she was assaulted in the park, there's plenty of people who blame the victim in these scenarios. I remember a thing about how someone was violently murdered because he walked home drunk and forgot to lock his doors. So many people were saying he had it coming because he expected not to be violently murdered in his home. These people are sick individuals.
I had a friend who I only knew for six months, and after I disappeared into a mental health ward after losing friends Id known for 7 years because I wouldn’t compromise my choices for myself, my fairly new friend yelled at me. “We’re ride or die, you tell me when you are feeling down and I will be here!” We are still friends to this day and I couldn’t imagine what Id do without her.
Mr. Facts, grab your partner and make those trips by car! You are never too old. My mom and I took the old Rt. 66 trip out west. We started from our home in Ohio, drove to California and turned around and drove home. It took three and a half weeks. Mom was 93! I drove, she payed, we both had a blast. We drove a dirt road part of Rt. 66 in Texas. We visited a museum of barbed wire in a small town filled with closed art deco gas stations and not much else. I drank fine moonshine in a ghost town in the desert outside of Death Valley while Mom relaxed. I could fill a book with all our adventures during those weeks and another describing our widely varied meals. Lost Mom three years later but the memories I have are amazing!!!
Story #8 Thanks for saying what you did about just reaching out and saying “Hey” in a simple text. I suffer from depression and PTSD and those simple messages can mean more than anything and often come at “just the right moment”.
I have a pretty positive story (tho it’s less what my friend said and more what she did). A couple years ago, around September 2020, my old dog died. We’d had him since before I started elementary school (I was a senior in HS) so it was really hard on my whole family. It was around 1am, but my mom managed to call a family friend who’s a vet to take the body to be cremated. My parents were trying to get the body in the car and sort things out with the vet, and my sister was locked in her room, so I didn’t have anyone to talk to about all this. Eventually, I pulled out my phone and called my friend, who picked up and let me ramble through my tears for almost 15 minutes. She didn’t really say anything, just listened, which I honestly really needed (when I’m upset I don’t like hearing advice, or apologies, or anything; just listening to what I have to say). The next morning my whole family was pretty messed up, and we all pretty much took an unofficial day off from everything (fortunately it was a Saturday). But around noon, my friend’s dad came to our house with a ton of food. Chilli, sandwiches, sodas… she’d gone to some high end food truck and bought my entire family comfort food, as well as some beer she brewed herself for my mom. She couldn’t bring it herself cuz she had a last minute call in to work, so she asked her dad to do it. The rest of the weekend she checked in via text to make sure we were all ok, and never asked for anything in return for all the stuff she gave us. That was the moment when my perspective of her changed; brief context I’ve had some not great friendships in the past so I tend to assume most of my relationships are fleeting at best, and I’d assumed the same of this one. But that was the moment I realized she was a friend who was gonna stick by me, and we’re still friends to this day, despite living in different states now
What of it’s actually a valid excuse. You could rudely criticize someone however that doesnt mean that there an asshole. Sometimes being honest in a rude way is good thing
*”I know I was rude but I am being honest.” - dickhead* And the world would be a better place if you disappeared tomorrow, Mister Dickhead. If you are disturbed by what I said, I am just being honest. :)
People stopped looking me as a "lovely and kind" wife as soon as I opened about being in ethical non-monogamy. Some of them just simply stopped talking or looking for me. Other told me how what I was doing was bad or disgusting, and some others didn't tell to my face but told my husband I am a slut. Obviously, we (husband and myself) do not relate with the ones that called me names. My other partner do not know these"friends" so he didn't have to do anything. It hurts that people stop talking to you but at the end it was a good decision.
People are cool with polyamory as long as it’s not a woman who is polyamorous 😅 Monogamy is not for everyone. More power to you and f the people trying to shame you for living your best life.
You know, some of these make me happy I've always been a very understanding and supportive person who just generally likes everyone and tries to view thing from their perspective.
I got asked that question a lot after I left the faith. My youth pastor tried to slander me by associating me with amoral behavior. I told him that I was doing weekly volunteer work in a soup kitchen at the time (truth) and asked him how he did "the lord's work" outside of church. It threw him off his game for the rest of youth group! 😂
I used to be friends with a guy who had a habit of miss remembering information and wasn't always the most cheerful individual. One time he tried to tell me that Sammy Hagar had passed away when it was really Ronnie Montrose, this was back in 2012. I also remeber him talking about how things were better when we were kids. What really changed the way I looked at him was in 2019, he texted me out of the blue to ask how I was and asked if I was still playing music. When I said yes, he responded with, "You probably meet more women than I do, most of the women at my work are stuck bitches". The last in person coversation I had with I had to explain that freedom of speech does not equal freedom from the consequence.
I was best friends with a girl in middle school. Eventually it came out that her cousin by marriage was being molested by her step dad. They were the same age so they had been together a lot growing up. This man was her mother’s brother. And he was a creep, you could just feel the “ick” off of him when he was around. My friend started to treat this girl like trash, just being so mean to her. I was feeling increasingly alarmed during this trip to her house because she was clearly bullying her. Why? For telling on her mother’s brother. He had been doing this for years and her horrible mother had allowed it to go on just because she wanted to keep the man. Suddenly when she wanted to break up with him-THEN she cared and turned him in for it. I spoke with the girl and realized that it was true, she had been going through this for years. The honesty and trauma just emanated from her. I said as much to my friend and she said snidely “who cares? She didn’t HAVE to go blabbing about it and ruin our family. She dealt with it all this time anyway. She’s ruined my uncle and now I’m going to tell everyone that she’s a liar!” That was the day that I stopped being her friend and started being the friend of the girl who had been molested. I told her how messed up that was, how wrong it was, and then she got mad at me. I didn’t care. I just left with that girl and we were friends all throughout school. She pretended to be this goody two shoes Catholic girl and put on airs about it. I realized that she wasn’t a good person at all. Church didn’t teach her a thing. I helped my new friend when she got pregnant senior year of high school by watching her baby while she went to school and worked shifts afterwards trying to get the money to pay for everything. Her baby daddy ran off on her. She just couldn’t catch a break in life so far. She worked her tail off to finish school, work, and then started college classes to become a pharmacist-all while raising a baby alone with an unsupportive family who wouldn’t help her. She had to pay a babysitter to watch the baby while in high school trying to finish school. She paid for it out of her own earnings. All of her friends helped her whenever we could and other by watching the baby or giving her baby supplies or clothing. She literally did it all, mostly alone. She married a nice guy and moved away for his work opportunity and she continued on with her college classes. And my ex friend? Also pregnant in senior year and she married her baby daddy. He went into the military for the opportunity and she stayed with her more than supportive family. While he was gone, she screwed her best friend’s husband (without permission, unbeknownst to her friend) and got pregnant by him, had an abortion, and then had a long string of affairs until her husband came back. Their daughter told on her mom accidentally because she was so little that she didn’t realize what she was doing. She just said “mommy had a lot of cousins stay over in her bed while daddy was gone.” He divorced her.
Story 15 was crazy relatable to me. I've been asked that question dozens of times since I left the faith (currently pagan). One of my favorite comebacks is "Why would I want to...? Do you want to!?" Or, if I wanna mess with a particularly stupid, easily scared person. "Eh. My schedule is booked up with (say other disturbing activities)...".
I do something similar to story 8. When a friend is having a hard time or is being emotional, I say to them “if you need space for now, I can give you space. When you’re need to talk, I can talk with you. If you don’t want to talk, then I won’t push it, but door is always open for you.”
Not said to me, but I found out secondhand. A "friend" was telling everyone who would listen that I slept my way to a promotion. She was jealous that she didn't get the promotion, despite working at this job several years less than me. Really opened my eyes to how shallow of a friend she is. Edit: before my promotion she was deemed incompetent to be considered for the position due to her unprofessional behavior.
The head nun at my temple once said something casually homophobic and the room literally started spinning for me. Thought I knew the woman, thought of her like a grandma
There is always time to travel and visit new places! It's important for you to make time for those things since you will regret it later in life that you never did it.
Travelling alone for weeks - there's no age restriction to that, and it's certainly not being in the 30s. I had a co-worker once, when I was in my mid-20s. She was in her mid-50s and people warned me about her. She's grouchy, mean, a real bitter spinster. She was a bit mean-ish, today I'd say blunt and no-nonsense but one day during my lunch break, she saw me reading a book in English (we live in Germany). Turned out, she loved the English language and anything England. We bonded a little over that and I quickly learned that what others called grouchy was actually just having a sarcastic streak and she was blunt with you when she expected better because she knew we could do better than whatever we just screwed up. She wasn't mean and insulting, she stayed always polite, but didn't sugarcoat anything. I learned to appreciate this attitude more than fake friendliness and people who'd say "All's great!" to your face and then whine about you behind your back. When my first summer in this company came closer I couldn't take time off because she already blocked the time slot (lesson learned: apply for vacation time as early as possible, preferably right after New Years Eve) for her yearly trip to England. She's been doing it since her divorce, as soon as her son was old enough to go on summer trips with his own buddies (again, Germany, here, nobody bats an eye when you let teens go on trips with friends as long as you know the people they're staying with). Every summer, she took all of her vacation days at once, packed a backpack, grabbed her hiking boots, and went backpacking through England. She stayed at different hotels, hostels, and, over the years, with local friends she made during previous trips. It was hard to believe if you only knew her prim and proper work persona. The older I get, the more I admire this woman when I think of her. She knew what she liked, she knew what she didn't like, and she had fair expectations. She did her best at her job and expected everyone else to do just that - the best we can. She wasn't for platitudes, fake friendships, and just saying "screw all this!" for a month every year, ditch the business attire, and travel to another country to go on hiking adventures? What's not to admire? That's also a valuable lesson I learned at a shitty job: often, if you look closer, you'll come to appreciate the grouches a lot more than those who are all smiles and open arms from the first minute they see you. Especially at work.
It's just that because of my chronic depression I don't really get interested in people, even my close ones. It's not that I'm self absorbed or anything, depression just kills my interest in multiple things. (Got it when I was 12, now 30, and legally retired because I just can't get better after 10 different medicines, years of therapy, magnetic therapy, shock therapy, etc.) It be like that, sometimes. I'm still active in my daily life and do lots of arts and crafts, and house work. I like helping others and often do, if I can, in any way. (So the problem doesn't make me physically unable to do something, it's all mental, like how fast I get a burnout.)
They’re part of the reason I’m still here; I was pretty much broken when my ex broke up with me (I had very bad depression then which she knew about) and they convinced me I still had things to live for (mainly my family); my Nana still thinks that they have some ulterior motive for being my friends but she doesn’t know that they’re part of the reason I didn’t try to end it all
This episode makes me wish I had actually checked in on old friends and family. Now I have no one. My fault but send a message to others a few times a year.
well my best friend was a girl I talked to for a year and a half. We spoke every day for hours, she was brilliant and had good ideas. Then I told her a bit about myself and she berated me, triggered a trauma response multiple times, among other things. She also advocated for _literal_ genocide. I quote “I don’t care who it is, sorry but they have to die” then she talked behind my back and all my acquaintances distanced themselves from me. Oh well.
You can’t force people to change. I tried every good word I could say to get her to leave. I made myself available but would no longer be willing to let her make excuses for him. I had to protect myself from the constant verbal sparring.
My now fiance and i went on a long walk befofe we started dating. For context, he asked me out a while before that and i said no for a few reasons (didnt want to risk the friendship and was kinda talking to someone else). First off, he completely accepted my "no" and continued to be an amazing friend. Major character moment #1. On that walk, we talked about everything. At some point we talked about what love means to us and how i have a hard time saying "i love you" because it feels cheap and i feel .ore comfortable showing it. We went to another topic and then it got down to like hour 4.5 of the walk. I had been working up the nerve to say something the whole time. He had supported me through a bad time the week prior and i couldn't stop thinking about how he did it purely from the love of me as a friend and with no ulterior motives. How do i know this for a fact? When i adked him if i should try asking someone out who i thought i liked but was worried about risking the friendship (i didnt specify who), his first question wasnt "who is it" or anything like that... It was "do you love him?" And then he started walking me through my feelings and helping me figure out how to talk to this person HE THOUGHT WASNT HIM. Boy was he shocked when i asked to hold his hand... That question was the moment i knew he was of the greatest character and with an amazing heart
Me and my best friend have a massive plan to travel the world, I’m… somewhat of the more careful one but she definitely balances that out by making me do new things and I make sure we never go too far! I think it’ll make the trip perfect.
This school year I was friends with this guy. We more just shared a lot of classes and we both like Legend of Zelda, so I mainly hung out with him. One day, I told him about that earthquake in Turkey. At the time, the death count was 17000. I told him this statistic and he laughed. Not like a chuckle or a soulless giggle. A full on belly laugh. Slowly my perception of him changed. He's surprisingly lacking in empathy would say things like 'Would you shoot up the school?'. Once on a school trip to the local amusement park he looked at a ride that spun upside down. We were in line but the girl I liked was on it. He knew that I liked her. And yet he still said that if the ride tipped over and she specifically died, he wouldn't bat an eye. This summer on a trip I found a group of friends who are actually a bunch of kind, caring, and funny people who I felt like I could be myself around and it showed me a totally different side of friendship I hadn't really been in for a long time. We're gonna keep an eye on my other 'friend' this school year and make sure he doesn't follow through on any of his promises. Edit: I returned to school recently, and he's even worse. Instead of just disliking gay people like he used to he now insists that they have no right to live on this planet. He's more violent, smashing a person into the lockers and kicking someone on the ground in the library ON THE FIRST DAY. There was a bomb threat at a local middle school and he laughed at how funny it was to him. Even worse, I can't escape him. I try to hang out with these other friends but he follows me and won't leave me alone. He constantly calls and texts me, talking about how 'gay people ruined the rainbow' or how hot some video game character is. I want to escape but I just can't
I have one friend who used to be a former manager at a previous job. This guy is a good ol’ boy through and through. Never went to college, not much in the way on intellectual conversation, and drinks like a fish, so imagine a guy like him being friends with an openly gay black guy with an artistic side. I was going through a rough patch in my life and was stuck working at a pub washing dishes. My friend was a frequent patron at said pub, and after a really bad night, he walked past the kitchen and saw me subconsciously flashing him a thousand yard stare. He asked me to join him at a nearby bar after my shift, and I took him up on it. While there, as we had a few beers, he gave me an unexpected pep talk. It was a side of him I didn’t see that often. Since that night, I’ve begun to see him like a big brother.
She told me the guys we had been on a double date with the night before called me the fat chick. I was not even close to fat so was puzzled. I asked the guys and they were shocked. Turns out every time I left the room she was bashing me. Never spoke to her again.
A couple of these stories remind me of a story my Mom tells about her midwife. Apparently she had the same one fo me and my brother. When my Mom was giving birth to me, the Midwife said "when the contractions start. Theyre not pains." But when my brother was born, it was "When the pains start." It turned out that between times the Midwife had given birth herself. (I'm British, BTW)
I like to do good things because I can't bear to see myself hurt other people for my actions which is really hypocritical because I tried to do that to keep people at arm's length because it's easier than them getting close and being personally hurt the whole eternal damnation is just a simple after thought
I had a friend that had a drinking problem. I tried to help him in every way possible. Until one day he asked me to mediate between him and his then girlfriend. Turns out he hit her frequently and when i called him out on it he threatened to un-alive me. I don't hang out with him anymore.
13:22 I may be a Christian, but just because God put that pain doesn't mean we shouldn't do something about it as God also gave us the means solve that pai Edit: You got really emotional there, not expecting that Edit2: 15:50 I do not claim those Christians as my brethren in the faith. I do not need religion to be a good person I actually converted to norse paganism for a while before being Christian again, but as a pagan I worked with Fenrír/Fenrisúlfr who is if you know is the harbinger of Ragnarók the norse apocalypse and let me tell you if you are a norse pagan I would suggest at least having one conversation with him as he is pretty great. I actually do miss working with the norse deities sometimes and while I do hold deistic(deism is the belief in all deities, but most worship only one god or one pantheon)beliefs I don't worship nor work with them
Some people conflate religion and empathy. You can have morals without religion because you can empathize with other people. I don't not murder people because I'm afraid some sky daddy is going to spank me for eternity if I do (for some people that might be incentive) I don't murder people because I wouldn't want someone to murder me so I can empathize with the sentiment.
Back in summerschool ( 4th going to 5th), One of my friends, said that Transgender people were a sin in the Bible, and that other religions wouldn't make it into heaven, (He was Christian). I never talked to him again.
I audibly gasped at the story of the guy who used a racial slur ("we're not supposed to breed with them"), but then the "when I run out of milk I use water sometimes" came after it and I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
I commented and below it said: There are no comments, say something to start the conversation. I think I’m first, but I’m not one of those kids that say first even though they are the 16th.
The title reminds me of a friend I recently had to let go of some months back Last time my had her in my home she was going off about a bunch of conspiracy theories And told me she doesn't like Mexican people and that she thinks makes race people look weird and that certain races just wouldn't mix together Here's the crazy part about all of this as if it wasn't crazy enough She herself is mixed rshe is Mexican and Caucasian That was the craziest part to me and I did not know how to react to that or what to say to it Like when it's a white guy hating on people of color it's easy to laugh and call them stupid you know make fun of them for saying something stupid But what do you do when somebody is hating literally everything they are yet they seem so oblivious to it .... She even said she wants to be with a white man so she'll have white children That is just simply not even true .... Some of those kids are gonna come out a little dark some of them are gonna come out a little white and the idea that she wants white children is terrifying because what if she ends up with one White kid is she going to favor the white kid is she going to hurt the others I was not able to fully absorb everything she said that night it wasn't till I went to bed and woke up in the morning and thought nope I can't do this I can't be friends with a person like this It's sad as it's very clear mentally she's gone off the deep end she's not sweet and intelligent anymore she's angry and her brain is a chaotic mess And I don't know what happened to her but I am scared for her and there's a lot of people that work with her that are scared of her and scared for her at the same time it's so heartbreaking and I just hope she's getting the help she's Needs and is gonna be OK Yeah this made me very sad to let her go as she's the 1st person I made friends with when I moved to this town And had the Let her go because she just went off the deep end and I don't know what happened
Not really my "friend" but actually my great uncle. I always thought my grandmother's brother was a great man and I loved seeing him when we went to visit (or he came to visit us). The first thing he did that was questionable was praise Trump being elected as president. That was certainly a red flag but, I'm not really big into politics and as long as you are not too extreme and try to force it down my throat, that wasn't enough for me to cut someone off. A few years afterwards though, he made a really nasty post to Facebook regarding the 2SLGBTQIA+ community. Basically saying "what a sad day for (town he lives); anyone who supports this 'LGBT' clearly hates God". I unfriended him soon after I saw that post
Story 16 - JEEZ I thought this channel was supposed to be family-friendly lol Maybe I got it mixed up with another reddit story channel that has made this claim. Idk
This wasn't so much a friend he was my supervisor I mean I was cool with him but wouldn't say he was a friend. So 1 day my gf who also worked at the same company only she worked in Quality Control I worked in production came to see what I wanted for lunch & he just so happened to walk in to the 2nd floor which is where I was stationed that day. When she leaves he asks if I was phucking her I told him thats personal he said we're men its normal for us to talk about that stuff I said I don't kiss & tell. Thats when he starts bragging about his conquest I guess to get me to open up. Only it backfired because what he told me had me wanting to start him punching & not stop. He was an older Vietnam vet so he told me how him & some of his army buddies use to pay for "it" when they where there which is bad already but then he said they would even pay to do it with girls as young as 12. It was already disgusting but the nonchalant way he said it like its no big deal made it even more disturbing. He was so proud of himself then he had the audacity to call the parents they paid to do it with their kids names like he's innocent in all this
I am a Christian but I’m not picky with religion and respect people’s choices. Your faith or no faith is not my problem but I’m sick of the other Christian’s. You know the ones who stand on a ladder preaching through a megaphone on the highway. Don’t be nosy. I respect your choices and hope you respect mine
I was in eight grade and was talking to my friend who was in seventh grade. in this school all the grades were kind of mashed together. well I was talking to them while working and we were joking around. all the sudden out of no were he said do you watch henti I do. I was like no the frick was that about. we were still friends for the rest of the year and wasn't in touch with him after that year but seriously that changed the way I looked at him
This probably story related or not up to you So context I never know much about my paternal grandparents wasn’t close to them My paternal grandmother passed away And my paternal grandfather is I don’t know where at all It was a mystery but it also feels like my aunts from my father’s side resents him so i was always wondering what did he do that ticked them off this much to shun him I thought of many things from He lives the thug life To he working with the cartels somewhere in California or even Mexico To even living a double life in a different country! So to the point of the answer Umm I’m close to this friend a lot He’s Mexican from his mom he and I have a lot in common and get along well He one day text me on messenger And ask me out of nowhere about my paternal side Because he’s looking for his grandmother’s old flame And I answer as best I can And well results is my paternal grandfather is the old flame! And it turns out he was living the womanizer life And it probably lead to him getting into fights with possibly husbands of the wives and neglect his children😅 So the moment my friend told me this, I was thinking he’s my hidden cousin but nah that wasn’t the case more on coincidence Me and him are close friends because now I know I can trust with talking about family stuff as much as he does😁
13:23 *sips tea 🍵 but yet men have a Adams Apple 🍎 kinda like a apple stuck from Adam’s sin..plus wasn’t that a metaphor for umm 🤔 how I put it when men kiss a woman’s meow meow or so I heard 😂
Bad move tell him to never ask you about it those D.A.R.E programs are completely lies and bullshit weed is not crack still don’t smoke it but you lost a friend for fear of something that would not hurt you that bad
Sorry about this comment cause it is rather emotional and I probably wouldn't say it to the person I have conversation with, but you say it to the thousands of people, many of whose you are probably a sort of authority to, so I feel the need to at least disagree, despite this comment being probably buried under better ones. About 16:12 the thing that woman said was ignorant, but you saying what you said show similar level of ignorance, just in another direction. Of course there are some Christians who think like this, but it is not what Christianity teaches... Heaven isn't the reward for good deeds and hell isn't the punishment for sins, at least not in the sense lots of people understand it - it is not the santa's list. And even if it would, it doesn't mean we do good things just for the reward or out of fear. The existence of reward for something doesn't mean people do the thing merely for the reward. Also I would almost bet you also sometimes say or think "yeah, so according to Christianity you can be a serial killer all of your life but as long as you say sorry to the God before the death you will go to heaven"... And still think we claim you must earn the Heaven with good deeds? Idk, maybe not, but I think I know people who think both of these is true, while it can't really be.
My friend went to a pride event and another one of my friends removed her from our group chat and then he said pride glitch. My friend was on another one of my friend’s phone and he found feet finder in her history.
Only hate for those "Christians" who misuse the words in the Bible to try to establish superiority over others, or use it to oppress, which is a small but loud minority among Christians. I you are a part of that small percentage of Christians who do crap like that, then there certain is a strong dislike, but it is far from unfounded.
Thanks for the bigotry against Christians! Love how you just assumed everyone's theology and then tried to walk it back with, 'But not all of you are insane.' Tolerance on display, ammirite?
My tolerance for the small percentage of Christians who misuse the words of the bible in gross ways is pretty dang low, and those are the "Christians" I was addressing, hence why I then clarified at the end that I know tons of absolutely wonderful Christians who don't do that. I was not trying to walk anything back, simply clarify my point as I realized I didn't make that clear in the beginning, as I do these responses off-the-cuff.
To touch on the story about the guy who commented on what the victim was wearing when she was assaulted in the park, there's plenty of people who blame the victim in these scenarios.
I remember a thing about how someone was violently murdered because he walked home drunk and forgot to lock his doors. So many people were saying he had it coming because he expected not to be violently murdered in his home. These people are sick individuals.
I had a friend who I only knew for six months, and after I disappeared into a mental health ward after losing friends Id known for 7 years because I wouldn’t compromise my choices for myself, my fairly new friend yelled at me. “We’re ride or die, you tell me when you are feeling down and I will be here!” We are still friends to this day and I couldn’t imagine what Id do without her.
Mr. Facts, grab your partner and make those trips by car! You are never too old. My mom and I took the old Rt. 66 trip out west. We started from our home in Ohio, drove to California and turned around and drove home. It took three and a half weeks. Mom was 93! I drove, she payed, we both had a blast. We drove a dirt road part of Rt. 66 in Texas. We visited a museum of barbed wire in a small town filled with closed art deco gas stations and not much else. I drank fine moonshine in a ghost town in the desert outside of Death Valley while Mom relaxed. I could fill a book with all our adventures during those weeks and another describing our widely varied meals. Lost Mom three years later but the memories I have are amazing!!!
Story #8 Thanks for saying what you did about just reaching out and saying “Hey” in a simple text. I suffer from depression and PTSD and those simple messages can mean more than anything and often come at “just the right moment”.
I have a pretty positive story (tho it’s less what my friend said and more what she did).
A couple years ago, around September 2020, my old dog died. We’d had him since before I started elementary school (I was a senior in HS) so it was really hard on my whole family. It was around 1am, but my mom managed to call a family friend who’s a vet to take the body to be cremated. My parents were trying to get the body in the car and sort things out with the vet, and my sister was locked in her room, so I didn’t have anyone to talk to about all this. Eventually, I pulled out my phone and called my friend, who picked up and let me ramble through my tears for almost 15 minutes. She didn’t really say anything, just listened, which I honestly really needed (when I’m upset I don’t like hearing advice, or apologies, or anything; just listening to what I have to say). The next morning my whole family was pretty messed up, and we all pretty much took an unofficial day off from everything (fortunately it was a Saturday). But around noon, my friend’s dad came to our house with a ton of food. Chilli, sandwiches, sodas… she’d gone to some high end food truck and bought my entire family comfort food, as well as some beer she brewed herself for my mom. She couldn’t bring it herself cuz she had a last minute call in to work, so she asked her dad to do it. The rest of the weekend she checked in via text to make sure we were all ok, and never asked for anything in return for all the stuff she gave us. That was the moment when my perspective of her changed; brief context I’ve had some not great friendships in the past so I tend to assume most of my relationships are fleeting at best, and I’d assumed the same of this one. But that was the moment I realized she was a friend who was gonna stick by me, and we’re still friends to this day, despite living in different states now
That friend is a keeper
I hate when when people saw something super mean and they know it but try to justify it by saying "Im being honest"
What of it’s actually a valid excuse. You could rudely criticize someone however that doesnt mean that there an asshole. Sometimes being honest in a rude way is good thing
@AwkwardFox0987 💀
*”I know I was rude but I am being honest.” - dickhead*
And the world would be a better place if you disappeared tomorrow, Mister Dickhead. If you are disturbed by what I said, I am just being honest. :)
Yeah, if anybody describes themself as “brutally honest” you know immediately that they’re just an asshole.
People stopped looking me as a "lovely and kind" wife as soon as I opened about being in ethical non-monogamy. Some of them just simply stopped talking or looking for me. Other told me how what I was doing was bad or disgusting, and some others didn't tell to my face but told my husband I am a slut.
Obviously, we (husband and myself) do not relate with the ones that called me names. My other partner do not know these"friends" so he didn't have to do anything. It hurts that people stop talking to you but at the end it was a good decision.
People are cool with polyamory as long as it’s not a woman who is polyamorous 😅
Monogamy is not for everyone. More power to you and f the people trying to shame you for living your best life.
@@gingerr_rrootsI mean, I think most people just feel that Polyamory is strange🤷🏻♀️
You know, some of these make me happy I've always been a very understanding and supportive person who just generally likes everyone and tries to view thing from their perspective.
I understand story 15 a lot, I had a similar experience like that. I hate how people just think we’re bad people because of our beliefs
I got asked that question a lot after I left the faith. My youth pastor tried to slander me by associating me with amoral behavior. I told him that I was doing weekly volunteer work in a soup kitchen at the time (truth) and asked him how he did "the lord's work" outside of church. It threw him off his game for the rest of youth group! 😂
I used to be friends with a guy who had a habit of miss remembering information and wasn't always the most cheerful individual. One time he tried to tell me that Sammy Hagar had passed away when it was really Ronnie Montrose, this was back in 2012. I also remeber him talking about how things were better when we were kids. What really changed the way I looked at him was in 2019, he texted me out of the blue to ask how I was and asked if I was still playing music. When I said yes, he responded with, "You probably meet more women than I do, most of the women at my work are stuck bitches". The last in person coversation I had with I had to explain that freedom of speech does not equal freedom from the consequence.
I was best friends with a girl in middle school. Eventually it came out that her cousin by marriage was being molested by her step dad. They were the same age so they had been together a lot growing up. This man was her mother’s brother. And he was a creep, you could just feel the “ick” off of him when he was around. My friend started to treat this girl like trash, just being so mean to her. I was feeling increasingly alarmed during this trip to her house because she was clearly bullying her. Why? For telling on her mother’s brother. He had been doing this for years and her horrible mother had allowed it to go on just because she wanted to keep the man. Suddenly when she wanted to break up with him-THEN she cared and turned him in for it. I spoke with the girl and realized that it was true, she had been going through this for years. The honesty and trauma just emanated from her. I said as much to my friend and she said snidely “who cares? She didn’t HAVE to go blabbing about it and ruin our family. She dealt with it all this time anyway. She’s ruined my uncle and now I’m going to tell everyone that she’s a liar!” That was the day that I stopped being her friend and started being the friend of the girl who had been molested. I told her how messed up that was, how wrong it was, and then she got mad at me. I didn’t care. I just left with that girl and we were friends all throughout school. She pretended to be this goody two shoes Catholic girl and put on airs about it. I realized that she wasn’t a good person at all. Church didn’t teach her a thing. I helped my new friend when she got pregnant senior year of high school by watching her baby while she went to school and worked shifts afterwards trying to get the money to pay for everything. Her baby daddy ran off on her. She just couldn’t catch a break in life so far. She worked her tail off to finish school, work, and then started college classes to become a pharmacist-all while raising a baby alone with an unsupportive family who wouldn’t help her. She had to pay a babysitter to watch the baby while in high school trying to finish school. She paid for it out of her own earnings. All of her friends helped her whenever we could and other by watching the baby or giving her baby supplies or clothing. She literally did it all, mostly alone. She married a nice guy and moved away for his work opportunity and she continued on with her college classes. And my ex friend? Also pregnant in senior year and she married her baby daddy. He went into the military for the opportunity and she stayed with her more than supportive family. While he was gone, she screwed her best friend’s husband (without permission, unbeknownst to her friend) and got pregnant by him, had an abortion, and then had a long string of affairs until her husband came back. Their daughter told on her mom accidentally because she was so little that she didn’t realize what she was doing. She just said “mommy had a lot of cousins stay over in her bed while daddy was gone.” He divorced her.
Story 15 was crazy relatable to me. I've been asked that question dozens of times since I left the faith (currently pagan). One of my favorite comebacks is "Why would I want to...? Do you want to!?" Or, if I wanna mess with a particularly stupid, easily scared person. "Eh. My schedule is booked up with (say other disturbing activities)...".
10:47 Story 8 is so lovely. I wish more people were like this.
I do something similar to story 8. When a friend is having a hard time or is being emotional, I say to them “if you need space for now, I can give you space. When you’re need to talk, I can talk with you. If you don’t want to talk, then I won’t push it, but door is always open for you.”
Not said to me, but I found out secondhand. A "friend" was telling everyone who would listen that I slept my way to a promotion. She was jealous that she didn't get the promotion, despite working at this job several years less than me. Really opened my eyes to how shallow of a friend she is.
Edit: before my promotion she was deemed incompetent to be considered for the position due to her unprofessional behavior.
Girls who tear down other girls with that particular rumour have a very special place in hell
@@Bethsabee_Sheba_NewroseYou got that right.
The head nun at my temple once said something casually homophobic and the room literally started spinning for me. Thought I knew the woman, thought of her like a grandma
There is always time to travel and visit new places! It's important for you to make time for those things since you will regret it later in life that you never did it.
Travelling alone for weeks - there's no age restriction to that, and it's certainly not being in the 30s.
I had a co-worker once, when I was in my mid-20s. She was in her mid-50s and people warned me about her. She's grouchy, mean, a real bitter spinster. She was a bit mean-ish, today I'd say blunt and no-nonsense but one day during my lunch break, she saw me reading a book in English (we live in Germany). Turned out, she loved the English language and anything England. We bonded a little over that and I quickly learned that what others called grouchy was actually just having a sarcastic streak and she was blunt with you when she expected better because she knew we could do better than whatever we just screwed up. She wasn't mean and insulting, she stayed always polite, but didn't sugarcoat anything. I learned to appreciate this attitude more than fake friendliness and people who'd say "All's great!" to your face and then whine about you behind your back.
When my first summer in this company came closer I couldn't take time off because she already blocked the time slot (lesson learned: apply for vacation time as early as possible, preferably right after New Years Eve) for her yearly trip to England. She's been doing it since her divorce, as soon as her son was old enough to go on summer trips with his own buddies (again, Germany, here, nobody bats an eye when you let teens go on trips with friends as long as you know the people they're staying with). Every summer, she took all of her vacation days at once, packed a backpack, grabbed her hiking boots, and went backpacking through England. She stayed at different hotels, hostels, and, over the years, with local friends she made during previous trips. It was hard to believe if you only knew her prim and proper work persona.
The older I get, the more I admire this woman when I think of her. She knew what she liked, she knew what she didn't like, and she had fair expectations. She did her best at her job and expected everyone else to do just that - the best we can. She wasn't for platitudes, fake friendships, and just saying "screw all this!" for a month every year, ditch the business attire, and travel to another country to go on hiking adventures? What's not to admire?
That's also a valuable lesson I learned at a shitty job: often, if you look closer, you'll come to appreciate the grouches a lot more than those who are all smiles and open arms from the first minute they see you. Especially at work.
It's just that because of my chronic depression I don't really get interested in people, even my close ones. It's not that I'm self absorbed or anything, depression just kills my interest in multiple things. (Got it when I was 12, now 30, and legally retired because I just can't get better after 10 different medicines, years of therapy, magnetic therapy, shock therapy, etc.) It be like that, sometimes. I'm still active in my daily life and do lots of arts and crafts, and house work. I like helping others and often do, if I can, in any way. (So the problem doesn't make me physically unable to do something, it's all mental, like how fast I get a burnout.)
They’re part of the reason I’m still here; I was pretty much broken when my ex broke up with me (I had very bad depression then which she knew about) and they convinced me I still had things to live for (mainly my family); my Nana still thinks that they have some ulterior motive for being my friends but she doesn’t know that they’re part of the reason I didn’t try to end it all
This episode makes me wish I had actually checked in on old friends and family. Now I have no one. My fault but send a message to others a few times a year.
🤗🫂
well my best friend was a girl I talked to for a year and a half. We spoke every day for hours, she was brilliant and had good ideas. Then I told her a bit about myself and she berated me, triggered a trauma response multiple times, among other things. She also advocated for _literal_ genocide. I quote “I don’t care who it is, sorry but they have to die”
then she talked behind my back and all my acquaintances distanced themselves from me. Oh well.
You can’t force people to change. I tried every good word I could say to get her to leave. I made myself available but would no longer be willing to let her make excuses for him. I had to protect myself from the constant verbal sparring.
My now fiance and i went on a long walk befofe we started dating. For context, he asked me out a while before that and i said no for a few reasons (didnt want to risk the friendship and was kinda talking to someone else). First off, he completely accepted my "no" and continued to be an amazing friend. Major character moment #1.
On that walk, we talked about everything. At some point we talked about what love means to us and how i have a hard time saying "i love you" because it feels cheap and i feel .ore comfortable showing it. We went to another topic and then it got down to like hour 4.5 of the walk. I had been working up the nerve to say something the whole time. He had supported me through a bad time the week prior and i couldn't stop thinking about how he did it purely from the love of me as a friend and with no ulterior motives. How do i know this for a fact? When i adked him if i should try asking someone out who i thought i liked but was worried about risking the friendship (i didnt specify who), his first question wasnt "who is it" or anything like that...
It was "do you love him?"
And then he started walking me through my feelings and helping me figure out how to talk to this person HE THOUGHT WASNT HIM.
Boy was he shocked when i asked to hold his hand...
That question was the moment i knew he was of the greatest character and with an amazing heart
Me and my best friend have a massive plan to travel the world, I’m… somewhat of the more careful one but she definitely balances that out by making me do new things and I make sure we never go too far! I think it’ll make the trip perfect.
This school year I was friends with this guy. We more just shared a lot of classes and we both like Legend of Zelda, so I mainly hung out with him. One day, I told him about that earthquake in Turkey. At the time, the death count was 17000. I told him this statistic and he laughed. Not like a chuckle or a soulless giggle. A full on belly laugh. Slowly my perception of him changed. He's surprisingly lacking in empathy would say things like 'Would you shoot up the school?'. Once on a school trip to the local amusement park he looked at a ride that spun upside down. We were in line but the girl I liked was on it. He knew that I liked her. And yet he still said that if the ride tipped over and she specifically died, he wouldn't bat an eye.
This summer on a trip I found a group of friends who are actually a bunch of kind, caring, and funny people who I felt like I could be myself around and it showed me a totally different side of friendship I hadn't really been in for a long time.
We're gonna keep an eye on my other 'friend' this school year and make sure he doesn't follow through on any of his promises.
Edit: I returned to school recently, and he's even worse. Instead of just disliking gay people like he used to he now insists that they have no right to live on this planet. He's more violent, smashing a person into the lockers and kicking someone on the ground in the library ON THE FIRST DAY. There was a bomb threat at a local middle school and he laughed at how funny it was to him. Even worse, I can't escape him. I try to hang out with these other friends but he follows me and won't leave me alone. He constantly calls and texts me, talking about how 'gay people ruined the rainbow' or how hot some video game character is. I want to escape but I just can't
5:22 omg please tell me that Mainly Facts guy was daydreaming about the Bob Seger song “Roll Me Away,” that would make my life lol
I have one friend who used to be a former manager at a previous job. This guy is a good ol’ boy through and through. Never went to college, not much in the way on intellectual conversation, and drinks like a fish, so imagine a guy like him being friends with an openly gay black guy with an artistic side.
I was going through a rough patch in my life and was stuck working at a pub washing dishes. My friend was a frequent patron at said pub, and after a really bad night, he walked past the kitchen and saw me subconsciously flashing him a thousand yard stare. He asked me to join him at a nearby bar after my shift, and I took him up on it. While there, as we had a few beers, he gave me an unexpected pep talk. It was a side of him I didn’t see that often. Since that night, I’ve begun to see him like a big brother.
She told me the guys we had been on a double date with the night before called me the fat chick. I was not even close to fat so was puzzled. I asked the guys and they were shocked. Turns out every time I left the room she was bashing me. Never spoke to her again.
A couple of these stories remind me of a story my Mom tells about her midwife. Apparently she had the same one fo me and my brother. When my Mom was giving birth to me, the Midwife said "when the contractions start. Theyre not pains." But when my brother was born, it was "When the pains start." It turned out that between times the Midwife had given birth herself. (I'm British, BTW)
I like to do good things because I can't bear to see myself hurt other people for my actions which is really hypocritical because I tried to do that to keep people at arm's length because it's easier than them getting close and being personally hurt the whole eternal damnation is just a simple after thought
Yay! Monday morning has been made.
I had a friend that had a drinking problem. I tried to help him in every way possible. Until one day he asked me to mediate between him and his then girlfriend. Turns out he hit her frequently and when i called him out on it he threatened to un-alive me.
I don't hang out with him anymore.
13:22 I may be a Christian, but just because God put that pain doesn't mean we shouldn't do something about it as God also gave us the means solve that pai
Edit: You got really emotional there, not expecting that
Edit2: 15:50 I do not claim those Christians as my brethren in the faith. I do not need religion to be a good person I actually converted to norse paganism for a while before being Christian again, but as a pagan I worked with Fenrír/Fenrisúlfr who is if you know is the harbinger of Ragnarók the norse apocalypse and let me tell you if you are a norse pagan I would suggest at least having one conversation with him as he is pretty great. I actually do miss working with the norse deities sometimes and while I do hold deistic(deism is the belief in all deities, but most worship only one god or one pantheon)beliefs I don't worship nor work with them
One friend said he tied his kid's dog to a tree in a forest when they got sick of it and left it there.
Story 26: someone get the wise man a beer for this cool advice.
Some people conflate religion and empathy. You can have morals without religion because you can empathize with other people. I don't not murder people because I'm afraid some sky daddy is going to spank me for eternity if I do (for some people that might be incentive) I don't murder people because I wouldn't want someone to murder me so I can empathize with the sentiment.
Then Came Bronson....Wild Hogs
its so weird to see him in a normal grey shirt. xD where are all the eccentric flashy ones???
Back in summerschool ( 4th going to 5th), One of my friends, said that Transgender people were a sin in the Bible, and that other religions wouldn't make it into heaven, (He was Christian).
I never talked to him again.
Story 15: Someone once said "God (by whatever name) may or may not exist, but if we live as if He does, then everybody wins!"
19:47 WTF 😳 I hate people like that they should be in jail
I audibly gasped at the story of the guy who used a racial slur ("we're not supposed to breed with them"), but then the "when I run out of milk I use water sometimes" came after it and I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
I commented and below it said: There are no comments, say something to start the conversation.
I think I’m first, but I’m not one of those kids that say first even though they are the 16th.
You are in fact first! Congratulations!
You’re funny 😆 I see what you did there.
Why do kids do that? It’s perplexed me ever since it started.
@@Bethsabee_Sheba_Newrose I know, right?
did you record new background game play?!
The title reminds me of a friend I recently had to let go of some months back
Last time my had her in my home she was going off about a bunch of conspiracy theories And told me she doesn't like Mexican people and that she thinks makes race people look weird and that certain races just wouldn't mix together
Here's the crazy part about all of this as if it wasn't crazy enough
She herself is mixed rshe is Mexican and Caucasian
That was the craziest part to me and I did not know how to react to that or what to say to it
Like when it's a white guy hating on people of color it's easy to laugh and call them stupid you know make fun of them for saying something stupid
But what do you do when somebody is hating literally everything they are yet they seem so oblivious to it .... She even said she wants to be with a white man so she'll have white children
That is just simply not even true .... Some of those kids are gonna come out a little dark some of them are gonna come out a little white and the idea that she wants white children is terrifying because what if she ends up with one White kid is she going to favor the white kid is she going to hurt the others
I was not able to fully absorb everything she said that night it wasn't till I went to bed and woke up in the morning and thought nope I can't do this I can't be friends with a person like this
It's sad as it's very clear mentally she's gone off the deep end she's not sweet and intelligent anymore she's angry and her brain is a chaotic mess And I don't know what happened to her but I am scared for her and there's a lot of people that work with her that are scared of her and scared for her at the same time it's so heartbreaking and I just hope she's getting the help she's Needs and is gonna be OK
Yeah this made me very sad to let her go as she's the 1st person I made friends with when I moved to this town And had the Let her go because she just went off the deep end and I don't know what happened
Omg I think she has self hate issues ,and one of her family members or more might be the ones putting those anti pox thoughts in her head
Not really my "friend" but actually my great uncle. I always thought my grandmother's brother was a great man and I loved seeing him when we went to visit (or he came to visit us).
The first thing he did that was questionable was praise Trump being elected as president. That was certainly a red flag but, I'm not really big into politics and as long as you are not too extreme and try to force it down my throat, that wasn't enough for me to cut someone off.
A few years afterwards though, he made a really nasty post to Facebook regarding the 2SLGBTQIA+ community. Basically saying "what a sad day for (town he lives); anyone who supports this 'LGBT' clearly hates God".
I unfriended him soon after I saw that post
Story 16 - JEEZ I thought this channel was supposed to be family-friendly lol
Maybe I got it mixed up with another reddit story channel that has made this claim. Idk
Thank you thanking not all Christian all Christian is not evil😊
What's the snowboarding game called?
This wasn't so much a friend he was my supervisor I mean I was cool with him but wouldn't say he was a friend. So 1 day my gf who also worked at the same company only she worked in Quality Control I worked in production came to see what I wanted for lunch & he just so happened to walk in to the 2nd floor which is where I was stationed that day. When she leaves he asks if I was phucking her I told him thats personal he said we're men its normal for us to talk about that stuff I said I don't kiss & tell. Thats when he starts bragging about his conquest I guess to get me to open up. Only it backfired because what he told me had me wanting to start him punching & not stop. He was an older Vietnam vet so he told me how him & some of his army buddies use to pay for "it" when they where there which is bad already but then he said they would even pay to do it with girls as young as 12. It was already disgusting but the nonchalant way he said it like its no big deal made it even more disturbing. He was so proud of himself then he had the audacity to call the parents they paid to do it with their kids names like he's innocent in all this
I am a Christian but I’m not picky with religion and respect people’s choices. Your faith or no faith is not my problem but I’m sick of the other Christian’s. You know the ones who stand on a ladder preaching through a megaphone on the highway. Don’t be nosy. I respect your choices and hope you respect mine
I was in eight grade and was talking to my friend who was in seventh grade. in this school all the grades were kind of mashed together. well I was talking to them while working and we were joking around. all the sudden out of no were he said do you watch henti I do. I was like no the frick was that about. we were still friends for the rest of the year and wasn't in touch with him after that year but seriously that changed the way I looked at him
This probably story related or not up to you
So context I never know much about my paternal grandparents wasn’t close to them
My paternal grandmother passed away
And my paternal grandfather is I don’t know where at all
It was a mystery but it also feels like my aunts from my father’s side resents him so i was always wondering what did he do that ticked them off this much to shun him
I thought of many things from
He lives the thug life
To he working with the cartels somewhere in California or even Mexico
To even living a double life in a different country!
So to the point of the answer
Umm I’m close to this friend a lot
He’s Mexican from his mom he and I have a lot in common and get along well
He one day text me on messenger
And ask me out of nowhere about my paternal side
Because he’s looking for his grandmother’s old flame
And I answer as best I can
And well results is my paternal grandfather is the old flame!
And it turns out he was living the womanizer life
And it probably lead to him getting into fights with possibly husbands of the wives and neglect his children😅
So the moment my friend told me this, I was thinking he’s my hidden cousin but nah that wasn’t the case more on coincidence
Me and him are close friends because now I know I can trust with talking about family stuff as much as he does😁
It's one thing being honest and another being an asshole. He coulda said "hey babe let's start going to the gym" help her
FACE REVEAL And he looks like buff egg man??
Is that a compliment or an insult?
Eggman is cool so I would say that’s a compliment
@@inkedthedemon thanks 👋
Thats definitely a complement
I’m confused, I’m sorry, are we referring to "Egg Man" or "Doctor Eggman"?
13:23 *sips tea 🍵 but yet men have a Adams Apple 🍎 kinda like a apple stuck from Adam’s sin..plus wasn’t that a metaphor for umm 🤔 how I put it when men kiss a woman’s meow meow or so I heard 😂
not necessarilly a freind but some kid at school said he smoked weed, i dont want to get into that so i asked to move lunch tables.
Bad move tell him to never ask you about it those D.A.R.E programs are completely lies and bullshit weed is not crack still don’t smoke it but you lost a friend for fear of something that would not hurt you that bad
I can’t see the reply that’s allegedly here.
Is there one?
🤷🏻♀️
Idk
*cough* *mr beast disproves this statement* *cough*
sorry something was stuck in my throat
Hello
Hi
Hey
Barrack & Michael in the White House & homeboys worried about future gays getting elected 😂
Sorry about this comment cause it is rather emotional and I probably wouldn't say it to the person I have conversation with, but you say it to the thousands of people, many of whose you are probably a sort of authority to, so I feel the need to at least disagree, despite this comment being probably buried under better ones.
About 16:12 the thing that woman said was ignorant, but you saying what you said show similar level of ignorance, just in another direction. Of course there are some Christians who think like this, but it is not what Christianity teaches... Heaven isn't the reward for good deeds and hell isn't the punishment for sins, at least not in the sense lots of people understand it - it is not the santa's list. And even if it would, it doesn't mean we do good things just for the reward or out of fear. The existence of reward for something doesn't mean people do the thing merely for the reward.
Also I would almost bet you also sometimes say or think "yeah, so according to Christianity you can be a serial killer all of your life but as long as you say sorry to the God before the death you will go to heaven"... And still think we claim you must earn the Heaven with good deeds? Idk, maybe not, but I think I know people who think both of these is true, while it can't really be.
35th
Face t
My friend went to a pride event and another one of my friends removed her from our group chat and then he said pride glitch.
My friend was on another one of my friend’s phone and he found feet finder in her history.
16:11 so much unfounded christian hate on this channel
Only hate for those "Christians" who misuse the words in the Bible to try to establish superiority over others, or use it to oppress, which is a small but loud minority among Christians. I you are a part of that small percentage of Christians who do crap like that, then there certain is a strong dislike, but it is far from unfounded.
I kinda agree with the husband in story 1
Thanks for the bigotry against Christians! Love how you just assumed everyone's theology and then tried to walk it back with, 'But not all of you are insane.' Tolerance on display, ammirite?
Time stamp please?
Just found it.
I think you’re interpreting him out of context. He wasn’t showing bigotry, especially when the factual definition of bigotry is considered.
OP really proves the point that Christians have a persecution complex...good job, little cultist.
My tolerance for the small percentage of Christians who misuse the words of the bible in gross ways is pretty dang low, and those are the "Christians" I was addressing, hence why I then clarified at the end that I know tons of absolutely wonderful Christians who don't do that. I was not trying to walk anything back, simply clarify my point as I realized I didn't make that clear in the beginning, as I do these responses off-the-cuff.
Did someone quote Moonlight?