My mom had a lower paying job that offered a retirement savings plan. My dad suggested that she put money in it. My mom didn't see the point. The concept was foreign to her. Upon my dad's insistence, she relented. Over time she noticed that her balance was increasing. Enthralled, she started investing more. This was mid career for her. Nearing retirement, she could take cruises and fly to exotic destinations. Her coworkers were stunned.
When I was three years into my career, one of my coworkers found out I wasn't participating in the company's 401k. She explained to me what it was and about our company match, etc, and I told her I couldn't afford it. She told me I couldn't NOT afford it. She made me sit down at a computer terminal and sign up for it, refusing to take "no" for an answer . Thirty years later, I'm so grateful she did that. It didn't add up as much as it should have according to Dave's math, not sure why, but it's a heck of a lot more than zero. Thank you, MJ!
Why didn’t it add it as much as it should have? That all depends how much you were investing and what you were investing in. 30 years compound interest should have yielded a few million
My dad was a janitor in school. He didn't like that he HAD to contribute to the retirement plan. Fast forward 20 plus yrs later. He is retired he admitted, if they didn't take it from his check. He would of never been able to retire
A child is not entitled to know their parent's finances, but by that same reasoning a parent is not entitled to be dependent on their grown child to take care of them when they are older or need care. If there is any expectation from this mother that her son is going to be involved in her elderly care, either housing or medical care or retirement home etc then she needs to start providing financial information to him now or else she's setting herself up for a terrible end of life.
I'm the oldest son of a Korean household, so the pressure to start my own family to continue on my family name, take care of my parents but also my aunt and uncle as well, while also having a successful career... Is unreal...
@john Smith Not unreal? Wow. It’s odd that you would say that. No one should have all that pressure placed on them. I wish you the best @Ingue Chun. If you wonder or wish that you could just move on and care for yourself and future family, don’t feel guilty about that thought, it’s a normal feeling. Unfortunately more times than not, family dynamics like these keep us in poverty.
Dealing with this too. My fiance is the oldest son of an Indian household. He is a dream of a person and I love him more than anything but it scares me to know all the burdens that are going to be placed upon us. I wouldn't change anything for the world. However, it stresses me and I am more conservative with money in anticipation of it. I just hope it doesn't shortchange what we are able to give to our future kids. I love his parents and I know their finances were shortchanged by having to support so many people before they were able to truly afford it. My fiance feels guilty every time he hears his parents talk about money issues. He interprets it all as his fault even when he wasn't the one who placed his parents in this position.
Because to retire would mean to admit they are old. Some people refuse to believe that they are too old to work. They rather pretend as if they are immortal.
When I'm old I don't want the feeling of I HAVE to get up and go to work. I want the freedom to work if I want, or go travel if I want, or literally do whatever I want. I will most likely have some type of work I'll be doing up until the day I die, but I would never want it to be forced.
Every time I hear stories like this I'm so glad both my parents worked and saved all their lives for retirement or for sickness. I love both my parent-(dad is terrible but still) I'd help them if needed so glad I don't have too though.
What does “well spoken” mean? I have never heard anyone say that about Dave, John Delaney, or other guest host. Please ask yourself why you made the “well spoke” statement about THIS young person.
@@superblump87 Most good people, if they have a choice, and if they've had a good relationship with their parents through the years, will not choose to allow a parent to go homeless. They will try to help their parents out financially or otherwise. Even if it's true that they shouldn't "have to", they care too much about their parents to let them sleep on the street.
@@superblump87 At 57 (which is what I thought they said on the video that her age was iirc) she shouldn't be getting social security checks yet. She's not old enough.
We tried to talk to my in-laws about this and they got SOOO offended. We didn't have the slightest Mal-intention but they took it so negatively. We were simply excited to follow the baby steps and learning about all Dave was speaking about... but when we tried to share, it just did not go well. We gave up trying to have that conversation.
You don’t assume if they are less than interested there was a reason for it? Saving and investing may be bad for their jobs also depending on industry.
It comes from a place of pride and insecurity. The discussion makes then feel embarrassed or stupid, and that hurts their pride. How you get around this is to make them feel even better. People are prone to think negatively. So when you bring up money the thought is that you are telling them that they are doing something wrong. However, its not about right or wrong, it's about exploring opportunities that may improve your existing results. Keyword there is opportunities. So the focus is on figuring out ways to make even more money.
Working through this scenario with my mom. First I tried the fear expressed as anger route which didn't work so well for me lol, but now I'm helping her by giving her the tools and information she needs to make good decisions.
@@rose-marielewis4717 yah I think she had fear paralysis, but once I started getting the hard numbers and showing her how she could combine her federal benefits with social security and a part time job, she started to have some hope. She's going to have less income than her working days though and she's got some debt. She's working through it as reasonably fast as she can.
How touching, the LOVE for the Mother who had you. Try to be of what help you can to her. Maybe she is TIRED. Be thankful you still have a Mother. It is a TREASURE not a burden. Maria in SC
We have no retirement funds. We’re in our 70’s and live off of Navy retirement, both SS, and my VA disability. It isn’t much and some months it’s tight
I don’t understand why people think they can work “till the end”. A lot of time people get ill and they can’t work till the end, they can’t work for even many years before they pass away. Healthwise even if you’re not in poor health you just get tired
My ex-husband told me flat out he wasn't saving a dime for retirement because he planned to work until he dropped dead. I congratulated him on his psychic abilities that he already knew he would never become disabled or in such poor health he couldn't work.
BTW...I had many coworkers that died shortly after, before, or few years shy of their RETIREMENT and did not get the chance to CASH the first check!....
That’s definitely a risk. But also… as weird as it sounds, living costs money and it’s important to be prepared for it. A big financial risk is living longer than expected. Imagine someone in their 20th year of retirement right now looking at $5.20/gallon milk
And that means what exactly not to save for retirement? Maybe they should have saved to retire earlier, but more importantly leave money for the upcoming generation
Okay, so what’s your point? Either way, death is inevitable. No one knows when death will be their calling. This shouldn’t hinder someone for not saving for their retirement! No one knows when death will reach them. Rather be safe with a retirement saved than to be sorry. In the end, money and materials can’t go with you regardless of when it’s your time to go. So you will lose everything eventually either way!
Harder but still doable. I’m sure that not ALL of the people on the planet whom have invested in retirement aren’t only people whom are married. I’m 100!percent sure there has been plenty of single parents whom have invested in their retirement throughout their careers.
I hate to be the one to say this, but back in the day, before the advent of the nuclear family, two income households, and children scattering all about the country to advance their careers, having to take care of grandma was never an issue because there were plenty of family members close by, or even living in the same house to share the burden. Families pooled their resources to ensure everyone's survival and well being. Nowadays, everyone's got to have their own house, own car, own phone line and have the arrogance to call people living in more collective arrangements backwards, all while wondering why they're living paycheck to paycheck.
Agreed. We are a 3 generation household, but we have a much higher and more comfortable standard of living than we could have apart. As long as the different personalities can coexist, it can be very financially beneficial .
Sharing a burden is still a burden. If you plan to be a burden on your kids, you should ask permission a decade in advance, dont call them up one day when you ran out of money.
When I met my husband he was 42 with no 401K and didn’t see the point in them. Now he has a new job and matches faithfully. He is so much more secure with saving now and looks forward to retirement instead of scared. ❤❤❤
My parents were worth a million in 2007. Mom was diagnosed with a disease and became disabled. Dad traded her in for a newer model 20 yrs younger. Mom was screwed out of 2 businesses and a home. She was left to go on welfare after 25 yrs of marriage. No matter what stuff does not always go as planned.
gotta love it when momma cant control her spending and the children have to bail her out. “oh but she raised you so you owe her” i guess is the logic of society.
People who think they can work until they drop are delusional. Bodies start failing in the 70s unless they are exceptionally lucky. And at that point they will still have nothing saved. Fix it now of you’ll be like me supporting three parents who are irresponsible with their money.
Dave knows nothing about this woman and yet makes conclusions. 57 is at least 10 years to retirement. Yet, we have no idea about her work, income, and education. He did not ask.
Exactly! Success is solving your own problems! My mom divorced my dad in 2002 - 2003 and has struggled ever since. Long after the divorce she was constantly being bailed out by her parents, ( to which she was NOT grateful), me, and even my dad after he remarried. She had decades to figure something out and plan for herself, but didn't. Time and time again I've witnessed her deliberately choose not to prioritize saving by living beyond her means.
I'm 36 have 13 years of service towards my pension and have about $20k combined in a Roth and 457. But I'm still renting and only about $15k in savings : / No idea when I'll be able to afford a down payment for a decent house.
LOL. If he is the only child and Mom is a widower, then she probably expects to a) live off social security, and b) get financial assistance from her one and only son. He, on the other hand, is worried that she might expect him to support her (shock! horror!) and his 'solution' is to get her to work more, spend less, and save for her own retirement funding... which she obviously finds somewhat offensive (and unappreciative of all she did for him). I think it might be a generational thing where she probably expects her son to provide for her if needed. Whereas as he as a GenX expects to spend only on himself and is horrified some of "his" money might have to be spent on his Mom.
Maybe she is unwilling to talk about her finances to her son because it is none of his business. If that is the case the son is not responsible for supporting her in her retirement.
G'day, l'm watching your videos again from my home here in Melbourne, Australia 🐨🦘🇭🇲😁👍 I retired from working for an employer at age 39. I'm now 45 and still have $1,100 coming in every fortnight from my Carer Pension and Carer allowance for looking after my 74yo schizophrenic mother whom can't walk at times. I put half of the money into my emergency fund.
Curious. I hear numorous times that the female should stay home and raise her children and support her husband and in the next breath crizised because "Mum" has not saved for retirement via a 401K which requires being in the workforce.. Or wose abandoned late in marriage..
I believe, that unless you’re somehow on the hook for the debt, by co signing, then you’re not responsible for the debt, BUT if the person who died has assets, then that has to be sold and any debts paid off with those assets. If there’s money leftover, then the heirs inherit what’s leftover. If there’s nothing leftover, then the creditors are SOL; that’s the risk you make when you loan someone money, but you’re not responsible for any remaining debt unless you co-signed it. The best thing you can do is to encourage them to live wisely with their money and tell them to organize all their finances into one place, and tell people that when they pass all financial info is in one place. Dave sells something called a legacy kit that you can buy for them to help them get started and be organized….it’s not fair to your loved ones having to be tied up settling all your outstanding financial issues and not giving them the tools to do it!!
best thing you can do is buy life insurance. Just get a cheap one with enough coverage to take care of mortgage and debt. If anything happens, people won't end on the streets
Why are people surprised it's alot of people just like his mom no retirement money and their plans are to live off SSI and maybe working part-time just for insurance purposes and if you're the only child of course she expects you to look after her
These women are unbelievable, the gall to expect your children to support you on top of themselves and likely a family. To expect your potential grandchildren to do with less so you can get away with being irresponsible. This is why a lot of mother in laws play a part in a divorce.
If your parents raised you right, then you owe them an internal gratitude for giving you life. There’s nothing wrong with a parent expecting filial piety and to fall back on the closest person to them in their time of need. If you can’t afford to support your parents and your children, that’s on you. Maybe don’t be such a failure, ingrate.
@@SDALLE99 I don’t think children owe their parents anything. They didn’t choose to be born, their parents chose to have kids. They had longer years to plan their retirement and with the crazy inflation these days, those parents should be ashamed of having to rely on their grown kids, especially if they have families of their own.
@@SDALLE99 Kid's didn't ask to be born, you are placing an obligation they didn't agree to. If you were a good loving parent you children will likely give you money here or there if they can or pay for certain things if they wish but you shouldn't expect it. You should save your money to support yourself regardless.
We have to remember that many mother's (esp previous generations) stay home to raise the children and support their husband's careers. And those that are able to work, mostly work for 69 cents on the dollar as compared to men and again we/they often work parttime because they are also fully responsible for the home, the children etc. Some of us, including myself have had serious health conditions and have not been able to work on a consistent basis I have zero retirement and no pension. Many of us focused our entire lives on raising and educating our children (and our HUSBANDS and our culture expected this) so our savings, retirement etc. is small or non-existent. Obviously, I cannot speak to this woman's situation I can only share mine. I do respect this this young man's love and caring for his mother and his concern for her future.
If she has cat food in the cupboard and doesn't have a cat, then you might want to be more direct in asking her tough questions. Until then, not your problem.
@@nataliepope3286 no. I think they’re saying that like a super desperate old person who is too proud to say anything might. I’ve never heard this before but it’s an evocative enough saying that it definitely gets the point across.
It becomes your problem if it means she becomes homeless or you help her. Luckily my mom is fortunate enough to have plenty going into retirement, but if she didn’t, I care about her too much for it to “not be my problem.”
@@johnmoore1495 Exactly! 👍 It makes me sick to think of all the kids now who think that helping their parents out is not their problem. Well if they raised you well, and they loved and cared about you, how could you in good conscience, (if the situation arose), just dump your parents like that (is the question I always wonder). Completely selfish kids if they could do something like that.
Bro just say it this way you should start investing for retirement because guess what I’m not going to support your retirement that’s exactly what I told my mom and good for her she’s investing now I helped her setup an account
If she's 57, she still has at least 10 years. I think I might feel a bit put upon if my son tried to tell me how to live my life. It's one thing if she asked and another if it's unsolicited. He might be worried that she's going to be a burden to him. I say cross that bridge when you come to it. Helping out our parents is an honor and a privilege if we can. The Bible says we will be blessed if we do.
Bottom line is the kid has NO IDEA what his mother's situation is and she's decided rightfully so that it's none of his business. Everything else is wild assumptions
@@saulgoodman2018 that is b/c many get a little over 1k each month from it! Even where I am 1 k a month is extremely poor and living on my own I can’t even make it work!!!
@@saulgoodman2018 oh and 1.6k average seems like a lot. I got a statement from s.s. staring my minimum in 30 years would be about 1.1k so it seems possible to be very poor if depending only on that.
Honestly people, quit judging some poor old woman you know nothing about. The son said that she won’t tell him, not that she doesn’t have anything. If anything she probably more clear about her own situation than anybody. Also, the son should work with intention to support her anyway, just in case. Just because she doesn’t tell him, doesn’t mean he can’t plan for it himself. It’s only right. Filial piety is the highest priority and part of a decent human being.
I'm 58 and I can't imagine sitting down my son to discuss my financials. Its none of his business. It could very well be that if she told him she planned to work as long as possible that she is a hard worker and has already planned for it. My parents have never discussed their planning for retirement and I never thought of it as a burden if they needed me. Problem is people in younger generations it's all about them and it could be he very well just wants to know how much he is getting one day. It's really hard to know with hearing only one side of the story. There is nothing he can do to make her do anything different than what she is doing now. I would actually find it disrespectful for young adult children to be asking about my financials.
*You see this ALL THE TIME, and actually people simply prefer to spend their money now, they don't see down the track, when they are unable to work.* 😉😉😉
My mom had a lower paying job that offered a retirement savings plan. My dad suggested that she put money in it. My mom didn't see the point. The concept was foreign to her. Upon my dad's insistence, she relented. Over time she noticed that her balance was increasing. Enthralled, she started investing more. This was mid career for her. Nearing retirement, she could take cruises and fly to exotic destinations. Her coworkers were stunned.
Wow!
Great. Win for sure
its crazy how valuable a 401k can become over the years
@john Smith
Or their employer deducted 20% for a defined benefit pension and lifetime family healthcare.
@john Smith a defined benefit pension and lifetime family healthcare.
With Mandatory contributions, not much left over.
When I was three years into my career, one of my coworkers found out I wasn't participating in the company's 401k. She explained to me what it was and about our company match, etc, and I told her I couldn't afford it. She told me I couldn't NOT afford it. She made me sit down at a computer terminal and sign up for it, refusing to take "no" for an answer .
Thirty years later, I'm so grateful she did that. It didn't add up as much as it should have according to Dave's math, not sure why, but it's a heck of a lot more than zero. Thank you, MJ!
Wow what a great coworker you were blessed with.
Similar event happened to me. I'm so grateful for those coworkers. I hope today's working generation still has people like that around
Great story 👍
Why didn’t it add it as much as it should have? That all depends how much you were investing and what you were investing in. 30 years compound interest should have yielded a few million
I hope you’re still great friends with her
My dad was a janitor in school. He didn't like that he HAD to contribute to the retirement plan. Fast forward 20 plus yrs later. He is retired he admitted, if they didn't take it from his check. He would of never been able to retire
Have not of
Yes, today's world it's even more necessary
A child is not entitled to know their parent's finances, but by that same reasoning a parent is not entitled to be dependent on their grown child to take care of them when they are older or need care. If there is any expectation from this mother that her son is going to be involved in her elderly care, either housing or medical care or retirement home etc then she needs to start providing financial information to him now or else she's setting herself up for a terrible end of life.
I'm the oldest son of a Korean household, so the pressure to start my own family to continue on my family name, take care of my parents but also my aunt and uncle as well, while also having a successful career... Is unreal...
@john Smith Not unreal? Wow. It’s odd that you would say that. No one should have all that pressure placed on them.
I wish you the best @Ingue Chun. If you wonder or wish that you could just move on and care for yourself and future family, don’t feel guilty about that thought, it’s a normal feeling. Unfortunately more times than not, family dynamics like these keep us in poverty.
My man just dont do it. 😂
Dealing with this too. My fiance is the oldest son of an Indian household. He is a dream of a person and I love him more than anything but it scares me to know all the burdens that are going to be placed upon us. I wouldn't change anything for the world. However, it stresses me and I am more conservative with money in anticipation of it. I just hope it doesn't shortchange what we are able to give to our future kids.
I love his parents and I know their finances were shortchanged by having to support so many people before they were able to truly afford it. My fiance feels guilty every time he hears his parents talk about money issues. He interprets it all as his fault even when he wasn't the one who placed his parents in this position.
Just say NO your money is for yourself, your future wife, and your future kids. It is only pressure if you allow it.
@@peaceness888It’s not too late. He’s going to support them no matter what and even if it puts you in the poor house.
The fact that people are okay with the idea of working till they die is 1000% insane to me.
Because to retire would mean to admit they are old. Some people refuse to believe that they are too old to work. They rather pretend as if they are immortal.
The concept of retirement is very new. For most of history, people worked until they couldn’t.
@@rachelharrison7961 and FYI is only available in Western rich countries. The rest have to work until they drop, as a matter of survival
@@rachelharrison7961 People used to have pensions, not IRA, 401K, 403B, 457B
75% of annual of the best 36 month run at 30 years of service
I know quite a few folks who don’t invest and are banking on lottery tickets and scratch offs.
When I'm old I don't want the feeling of I HAVE to get up and go to work. I want the freedom to work if I want, or go travel if I want, or literally do whatever I want. I will most likely have some type of work I'll be doing up until the day I die, but I would never want it to be forced.
I really like this lady on with Dave! I think she is bringing up great advice
oops.. she won't be on air long then.
the moment she strays away from baby steps, she will be off..
George has this down, perfect Ramsey puppet 👏 🤣
Every time I hear stories like this I'm so glad both my parents worked and saved all their lives for retirement or for sickness. I love both my parent-(dad is terrible but still) I'd help them if needed so glad I don't have too though.
That’s a blessing
This new lady is very well spoken. I like her.
What does “well spoken” mean? I have never heard anyone say that about Dave, John Delaney, or other guest host. Please ask yourself why you made the “well spoke” statement about THIS young person.
This lady has a good voice for this job
You are not mommy’s financial advisor. You are 100% correct though it shouldn’t have to fall on you. She’s had time to plan and didn’t.
Yea and there’s a lot of parents who like to think their kids will solve all their money problems.
@@SteveC484 no, that's her choice.
@@superblump87 Most good people, if they have a choice, and if they've had a good relationship with their parents through the years, will not choose to allow a parent to go homeless. They will try to help their parents out financially or otherwise. Even if it's true that they shouldn't "have to", they care too much about their parents to let them sleep on the street.
@@Sheryl777 well she should spend her social security checks on housing instead of whatever she is spending them on.
@@superblump87 At 57 (which is what I thought they said on the video that her age was iirc) she shouldn't be getting social security checks yet. She's not old enough.
We tried to talk to my in-laws about this and they got SOOO offended. We didn't have the slightest Mal-intention but they took it so negatively. We were simply excited to follow the baby steps and learning about all Dave was speaking about... but when we tried to share, it just did not go well. We gave up trying to have that conversation.
You don’t assume if they are less than interested there was a reason for it? Saving and investing may be bad for their jobs also depending on industry.
@@donaldlyons17 What? For what job is saving and investing bad🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂
It comes from a place of pride and insecurity. The discussion makes then feel embarrassed or stupid, and that hurts their pride.
How you get around this is to make them feel even better. People are prone to think negatively. So when you bring up money the thought is that you are telling them that they are doing something wrong. However, its not about right or wrong, it's about exploring opportunities that may improve your existing results. Keyword there is opportunities. So the focus is on figuring out ways to make even more money.
Working through this scenario with my mom. First I tried the fear expressed as anger route which didn't work so well for me lol, but now I'm helping her by giving her the tools and information she needs to make good decisions.
Is it working? Is she more receptive?
@@rose-marielewis4717 yah I think she had fear paralysis, but once I started getting the hard numbers and showing her how she could combine her federal benefits with social security and a part time job, she started to have some hope.
She's going to have less income than her working days though and she's got some debt. She's working through it as reasonably fast as she can.
How did you get an estimate for her SS?
Great advice, but always remember that Parents with narcissistic tendencies will fight you till the very end.
Yep, they’re entitled and expect you to pay for their retirement
@@pokemont9989 - 100% No amount of Ramsey can cure them - even if you accurately predict their future!
@@pokemont9989 WOW! Typical narcissistic child!
How touching, the LOVE for the Mother who had you. Try to be of what help you can to her. Maybe she is TIRED. Be thankful you still have a Mother. It is a TREASURE not a burden. Maria in SC
We have no retirement funds. We’re in our 70’s and live off of Navy retirement, both SS, and my VA disability. It isn’t much and some months it’s tight
I don’t understand why people think they can work “till the end”. A lot of time people get ill and they can’t work till the end, they can’t work for even many years before they pass away. Healthwise even if you’re not in poor health you just get tired
My ex-husband told me flat out he wasn't saving a dime for retirement because he planned to work until he dropped dead. I congratulated him on his psychic abilities that he already knew he would never become disabled or in such poor health he couldn't work.
BTW...I had many coworkers that died shortly after, before, or few years shy of their RETIREMENT and did not get the chance to CASH the first check!....
How many were Female?
That’s definitely a risk. But also… as weird as it sounds, living costs money and it’s important to be prepared for it. A big financial risk is living longer than expected.
Imagine someone in their 20th year of retirement right now looking at $5.20/gallon milk
And that means what exactly not to save for retirement? Maybe they should have saved to retire earlier, but more importantly leave money for the upcoming generation
Okay, so what’s your point? Either way, death is inevitable. No one knows when death will be their calling. This shouldn’t hinder someone for not saving for their retirement! No one knows when death will reach them. Rather be safe with a retirement saved than to be sorry. In the end, money and materials can’t go with you regardless of when it’s your time to go. So you will lose everything eventually either way!
@@ClaxtonBay123 exactly! I don’t understand the purpose of this person’s statement.
That’s nice he’s trying to help his mom out
His mom isn't interested in his help
@@DisabilityExams true lol
I’m starting to like this new lady…
Man so many Americans have thier heads in the sand like ostriches
How so
Not just Americans
It is also gonna be even harder than normal to save enough for retirement if the person is a single parent.
Harder but still doable. I’m sure that not ALL of the people on the planet whom have invested in retirement aren’t only people whom are married. I’m 100!percent sure there has been plenty of single parents whom have invested in their retirement throughout their careers.
Or gray divorced. It's not just men who lose money and have to pay rent or a mortgage, at age 50-something.
I hate to be the one to say this, but back in the day, before the advent of the nuclear family, two income households, and children scattering all about the country to advance their careers, having to take care of grandma was never an issue because there were plenty of family members close by, or even living in the same house to share the burden. Families pooled their resources to ensure everyone's survival and well being.
Nowadays, everyone's got to have their own house, own car, own phone line and have the arrogance to call people living in more collective arrangements backwards, all while wondering why they're living paycheck to paycheck.
Agreed. We are a 3 generation household, but we have a much higher and more comfortable standard of living than we could have apart. As long as the different personalities can coexist, it can be very financially beneficial .
Sharing a burden is still a burden. If you plan to be a burden on your kids, you should ask permission a decade in advance, dont call them up one day when you ran out of money.
When I met my husband he was 42 with no 401K and didn’t see the point in them. Now he has a new job and matches faithfully. He is so much more secure with saving now and looks forward to retirement instead of scared. ❤❤❤
My parents were worth a million in 2007. Mom was diagnosed with a disease and became disabled. Dad traded her in for a newer model 20 yrs younger. Mom was screwed out of 2 businesses and a home. She was left to go on welfare after 25 yrs of marriage. No matter what stuff does not always go as planned.
gotta love it when momma cant control her spending and the children have to bail her out. “oh but she raised you so you owe her” i guess is the logic of society.
It’s called human decency
@@SDALLE99 do you mean it's human decency to support a parent with no finances?
Human decency is you spending frugally and saving your whole life so you dont have to rely on your kids to retire
People who think they can work until they drop are delusional. Bodies start failing in the 70s unless they are exceptionally lucky. And at that point they will still have nothing saved. Fix it now of you’ll be like me supporting three parents who are irresponsible with their money.
Dave knows nothing about this woman and yet makes conclusions. 57 is at least 10 years to retirement. Yet, we have no idea about her work, income, and education. He did not ask.
Don’t need to know about her work, income and education… saving money is something everyone can do if you live within your means.
Exactly! Success is solving your own problems! My mom divorced my dad in 2002 - 2003 and has struggled ever since. Long after the divorce she was constantly being bailed out by her parents, ( to which she was NOT grateful), me, and even my dad after he remarried. She had decades to figure something out and plan for herself, but didn't. Time and time again I've witnessed her deliberately choose not to prioritize saving by living beyond her means.
I'm 36 have 13 years of service towards my pension and have about $20k combined in a Roth and 457. But I'm still renting and only about $15k in savings : / No idea when I'll be able to afford a down payment for a decent house.
Wait, she quit her job?
Hello New Person in Green :-). Welcome!
LOL. If he is the only child and Mom is a widower, then she probably expects to a) live off social security, and b) get financial assistance from her one and only son.
He, on the other hand, is worried that she might expect him to support her (shock! horror!) and his 'solution' is to get her to work more, spend less, and save for her own retirement funding... which she obviously finds somewhat offensive (and unappreciative of all she did for him).
I think it might be a generational thing where she probably expects her son to provide for her if needed. Whereas as he as a GenX expects to spend only on himself and is horrified some of "his" money might have to be spent on his Mom.
So what should a 58 year old do, doesn't own a home, has no life insurance, no burial plan, no advanced directive, etc.? Do Dave's books cover this?
The same thing everybody else does, start saving money and building wealth.
@@adamseidel9780 not helpful
@@sl4983 it’s literally the answer. You’re behind the game but there’s only one way to start catching up.
Check into a cremation or donating your body to science.
@@PinkMaeve Or donating it to science fiction.
Maybe she is unwilling to talk about her finances to her son because it is none of his business. If that is the case the son is not responsible for supporting her in her retirement.
That’s being naïve, isn’t ?
I think she probably does have money and is just not ready to have that conversation with her child.
It is his business if she expects her son to help support her in retirement.
She absolutely should talk with him
Ah, so her name is Christina. First time I believe that I've heard her name. She's pretty good on the show.
That’s how my parents are. They have health issues as well.
I wonder how late is too late to save for retirement.
The day before you die, duh.
Never too late
@@tracywalker244 cringe toxic positivity. Just tell the truth
it's when your physically can't move around anymore and or mentally work anymore
G'day, l'm watching your videos again from my home here in Melbourne, Australia 🐨🦘🇭🇲😁👍
I retired from working for an employer at age 39. I'm now 45 and still have $1,100 coming in every fortnight from my Carer Pension and Carer allowance for looking after my 74yo schizophrenic mother whom can't walk at times. I put half of the money into my emergency fund.
Curious. I hear numorous times that the female should stay home and raise her children and support her husband and in the next breath crizised because "Mum" has not saved for retirement via a 401K which requires being in the workforce.. Or wose abandoned late in marriage..
I invest in 401k cause the bank don't give u no interest.
401K steals your money. Google it, if you don't believe me.
Maybe she doesn't want him to know what she has....
I'm sorry to say that the vast majority of Americans will never retire with the kind of inflation we are headed for.
How do you avoid having to pay the debt of a loved one when they pass if you live in a state where next-of-kin is responsible.
I believe, that unless you’re somehow on the hook for the debt, by co signing, then you’re not responsible for the debt, BUT if the person who died has assets, then that has to be sold and any debts paid off with those assets. If there’s money leftover, then the heirs inherit what’s leftover. If there’s nothing leftover, then the creditors are SOL; that’s the risk you make when you loan someone money, but you’re not responsible for any remaining debt unless you co-signed it.
The best thing you can do is to encourage them to live wisely with their money and tell them to organize all their finances into one place, and tell people that when they pass all financial info is in one place.
Dave sells something called a legacy kit that you can buy for them to help them get started and be organized….it’s not fair to your loved ones having to be tied up settling all your outstanding financial issues and not giving them the tools to do it!!
Following
Move out of state
There is no such thing.
Never heard of such a thing ?
My parents refuse to talk money with them. It’s none of my business according to them. So, I’m good with you do you.
best thing you can do is buy life insurance. Just get a cheap one with enough coverage to take care of mortgage and debt. If anything happens, people won't end on the streets
There's no such thing as cheap insurance for a 57 year old
Growing old into retirement isn’t guaranteed.
Where can I get a R coffee mug?
Why are people surprised it's alot of people just like his mom no retirement money and their plans are to live off SSI and maybe working part-time just for insurance purposes and if you're the only child of course she expects you to look after her
These women are unbelievable, the gall to expect your children to support you on top of themselves and likely a family. To expect your potential grandchildren to do with less so you can get away with being irresponsible. This is why a lot of mother in laws play a part in a divorce.
If your parents raised you right, then you owe them an internal gratitude for giving you life. There’s nothing wrong with a parent expecting filial piety and to fall back on the closest person to them in their time of need. If you can’t afford to support your parents and your children, that’s on you. Maybe don’t be such a failure, ingrate.
@@SDALLE99 I don’t think children owe their parents anything. They didn’t choose to be born, their parents chose to have kids. They had longer years to plan their retirement and with the crazy inflation these days, those parents should be ashamed of having to rely on their grown kids, especially if they have families of their own.
@@SDALLE99 Kid's didn't ask to be born, you are placing an obligation they didn't agree to. If you were a good loving parent you children will likely give you money here or there if they can or pay for certain things if they wish but you shouldn't expect it. You should save your money to support yourself regardless.
All the reason to put retirement planning ahead of college funds.
@@joyaustin6581 Agreed but I believe both can be done
Respect her wishes and let it go.
The way we retire in this country is stupid.
57 is too late not too early.
We have to remember that many mother's (esp previous generations) stay home to raise the children and support their husband's careers. And those that are able to work, mostly work for 69 cents on the dollar as compared to men and again we/they often work parttime because they are also fully responsible for the home, the children etc. Some of us, including myself have had serious health conditions and have not been able to work on a consistent basis I have zero retirement and no pension. Many of us focused our entire lives on raising and educating our children (and our HUSBANDS and our culture expected this) so our savings, retirement etc. is small or non-existent. Obviously, I cannot speak to this woman's situation I can only share mine. I do respect this this young man's love and caring for his mother and his concern for her future.
I cant take you seriously if you're propagating the wage gap myth. No one would hire men if they could hire women for 30% cheaper.
Who is the new lady? I like her!
If she has cat food in the cupboard and doesn't have a cat, then you might want to be more direct in asking her tough questions. Until then, not your problem.
I heard this reference use a lot by persons. So I’m just gonna ask..
Do American eat cat food for some reason?
Dude per lb canned cat food cost more than human food lol
@@nataliepope3286 no. I think they’re saying that like a super desperate old person who is too proud to say anything might. I’ve never heard this before but it’s an evocative enough saying that it definitely gets the point across.
It becomes your problem if it means she becomes homeless or you help her. Luckily my mom is fortunate enough to have plenty going into retirement, but if she didn’t, I care about her too much for it to “not be my problem.”
@@johnmoore1495 Exactly! 👍 It makes me sick to think of all the kids now who think that helping their parents out is not their problem. Well if they raised you well, and they loved and cared about you, how could you in good conscience, (if the situation arose), just dump your parents like that (is the question I always wonder). Completely selfish kids if they could do something like that.
Technically it isn’t Kyle’s business…
She needs to get over herself, grow up, and face reality at her age. Time to grow up and plan for the future lady.
Tell mom that she is irresponsible and has to deal with it herself
@@saulgoodman2018 well, for one, she is unable to retire right now, and apparently doesn't even want help
Bro just say it this way you should start investing for retirement because guess what I’m not going to support your retirement that’s exactly what I told my mom and good for her she’s investing now I helped her setup an account
That's so cruel of you Dud to teach her the most sweetest lesson of life !!!
If she's 57, she still has at least 10 years. I think I might feel a bit put upon if my son tried to tell me how to live my life. It's one thing if she asked and another if it's unsolicited. He might be worried that she's going to be a burden to him. I say cross that bridge when you come to it. Helping out our parents is an honor and a privilege if we can. The Bible says we will be blessed if we do.
Bottom line is the kid has NO IDEA what his mother's situation is and she's decided rightfully so that it's none of his business. Everything else is wild assumptions
She's still going to get Social Security Income so it's not like she can't retire. She probably just doesn't have enough money for it.
@@saulgoodman2018 that is b/c many get a little over 1k each month from it! Even where I am 1 k a month is extremely poor and living on my own I can’t even make it work!!!
@@saulgoodman2018 oh and 1.6k average seems like a lot. I got a statement from s.s. staring my minimum in 30 years would be about 1.1k so it seems possible to be very poor if depending only on that.
He should approach her out of love and respect and gratefulness instead of "oh my , I might have to help her."
Honestly people, quit judging some poor old woman you know nothing about. The son said that she won’t tell him, not that she doesn’t have anything. If anything she probably more clear about her own situation than anybody.
Also, the son should work with intention to support her anyway, just in case. Just because she doesn’t tell him, doesn’t mean he can’t plan for it himself.
It’s only right. Filial piety is the highest priority and part of a decent human being.
We're judging the worst case scenario and what are the actual possibilities for a better future. Nothing wrong with that either
He is her retirement plan
Why does he assume she doesn’t have a plan? 57 Isn’t that old either. Holy assumption batman.
@john Smith but she may have savings. I didn’t hear the caller saying she doesn’t or that she told him he’s her retirement plan.
☹
New phone
I'm 58 and I can't imagine sitting down my son to discuss my financials. Its none of his business. It could very well be that if she told him she planned to work as long as possible that she is a hard worker and has already planned for it. My parents have never discussed their planning for retirement and I never thought of it as a burden if they needed me. Problem is people in younger generations it's all about them and it could be he very well just wants to know how much he is getting one day. It's really hard to know with hearing only one side of the story. There is nothing he can do to make her do anything different than what she is doing now. I would actually find it disrespectful for young adult children to be asking about my financials.
You are way off the mark here..
Unless she is asking for help it's really not your business what she has or is doing. Stay in your lane.
Christina, It would be nice if you could reply to the emails. You never answer any of the emails. Thanks
I just lost 700 gambling
Women b shopping
Boomers are just so wise aren’t they?
Boomers strike again
most people's pension plan is their kids. luckily my mom isn't stupid with money.
it would be anit climatic if the kid came out disabled so that way not only he can't help their parents they cant even help themselfs
This Hillary Clinton host is going to destroy Ramsey solutions..🤮
First
Nope, Poppin beat you. There's always next time 🤷🏻♂️
Have any of you been happy with DR Smartvestor pros? On the first try?
How do I learn about funds like
UMBMX, AMBEX, AMBFX, HYMAX?
*You see this ALL THE TIME, and actually people simply prefer to spend their money now, they don't see down the track, when they are unable to work.* 😉😉😉
That's why you see so many "retired" folks living in a van in an Arizona desert.
That’s because “down the track” isn’t guaranteed. You could very well die long before you retire.