I had to give my mom permission to die when she said, "I can't leave here yet." I told her everything was going to be fine, that I would be fine, I have never told a bigger lie in my life. She smiled and squeezed my hand and died ten minutes later. Thank every single one of you who has shown kindness and understanding to a dementia patient.
This comment literally made me break down in tears, I can’t even imagine going through that I love my mom to death and I haven’t seen her in well over a year because of covid and my biggest fear is that something happens to my parents while I have no way of being there
I’m really sorry about that, to both of you. Every time I hear of somebody dying, one of the first things I think is that if they were in pain, they aren’t anymore. They are living happily in heaven, and they are taking care of any pets or other family members you have lost. My great grandmother is taking care of all my lost pets right now.
I know someone who was a ER nurse and she used to tell the unsaveable patients " it's ok you can go now" and they would typically pass away shortly. Only time she broke this was telling her own mother to hang on so her sister and nephew could say goodbye.
Very sorry for your loss. Both my grandmothers had dementia. (Unf/F)ortunately, I was not present for either of them passing. Either way, I don't know how I'd have handled such. The ones who handle it well must be tough mofos.
"So it feels like shes getting a second chance with a real mom." That really touched me. I've always believed that children who pass always go back to live the life they deserve.
I once heard a song that refered to children who pass as narrowed angels and have stuck with both the idea that are barrowed angels too pure for this world and that they can be reborn to fulfill the life they never got to live the first time. Still, I can't understand how anyone could abuse something as pure and innocent as a child or an animal.
I just couldn't stop vomiting throughout my pregnancy. Lost weight to the point the doctors were very worried and admitted to hospital at 29 weeks. Potassium was 2.3 and amongst other stuff, so they put in a CVC into my jugular.About a week later I spiked a 40.2 degree fever and my mum was told I was dying of sepsis (CRP at 230mg/L) and they would preform an emergency C-Section. My baby got into the NICU and I into the ICU, my heart stopped twice, I was about 35kg after delivery and holding on by the edge of a knife......We both made it! My son is 11 month old now and just started saying Mama.
In response to the hypothetical family who wouldn’t make their loved one a DNR- I was 22 years old (I’m 23 now, but this was only 4 months ago...) and my mother was found unresponsive with a blood sugar of 800 on her bedroom floor. They flew her out. The same night she reached the big city hospital, her ICU doctor called me. She asked me if my mom would want to be resuscitated and I broke down. We are from a small town, and my mom was very close with the head administrator of our local hospital. For years my mom had said, “Kelly!! If something happens, pull the damn plug, because I don’t think my kids will be strong enough to do it!” With that in mind, I gave verbal consent for a DNR and written consent the following day while I was by her side, as life support kept her going. PLEASE, have this conversation with your loved ones, especially your parents!! My mother is pulling through, she will never be the same, and has to live in a nursing home for the rest of her life (she will only be 50 in August,) but had she have coded and that DNR was needed, I know damn good and well I did what she would have wanted.
L Elliott what an awful thing for you to go through. It’s good that you had had that conversation previously and were able to follow her wishes, it takes a lot of strength to do that. I’m glad she’s pulling through (although it must be incredibly difficult knowing she won’t fully recover). Thinking of you
My mother always said she never wanted her children to see her pass. After a few days, my brothers and I decided to all get some decent rest other than just napping on each other's shoulder. That night was when she passed, our dad was holding her hand and talking to her as she passed. I'm glad she wasn't alone.
“Hospital trips are funny, the first week everybody comes to visit you, but after that guests seem to taper off dramatically.” I learned this cold hard truth when I got chronically ill. People who used to check up on me no longer have any idea how I’m doing. I got worse and none of them know because they stopped contacting me. At some point a sick person becomes “boring”, I suppose. It’s fun when you can come in and be all nice and wish them good luck, knowing they’ll be back in a week. But once it’s chronic? Nah. Not worth it. :/ Apparently.
Actually I been in the opposite situation having love ones be chronic and it's just hard going to see someone you care about getting worse... I'll admit being weak and not going because they were ok in my head. Seeing them in that situation hurt me and made me realize they were dying and there was nothing I could do about it. It was kind of a if I don't see it or think about it it's not happening situation and when I look back I do feel guilty for not being strong enough for them.
I really hope you read this if your still chronic people do probably care about you and love it's just hard to be there and watch someone slowly fade away. And I hope you don't and you recover.
Its more that they have their own lives to get back to. I wouldn't want people to be visiting me all the time if they've still got things to worry about, they should enjoy the things I couldnt. And especially in an age where communication couldnt be easier, having someone in the room isn't a necessity
@@geminiadastra8662 I mean, they don’t have to visit *all the time*, but just every once in a while would be nice. Hell, maybe just for my birthday, that’s fine. And of course thank the lord for the internet and smartphones, but even through that some people kind of just quit contacting you. Maybe it’s easy to think “then those people aren’t worth it, think about the people who do” but when you’ve been friends with someone for 15 years and then in time you kind of don’t exist anymore, that stings. …yes I may have a personal problem, haha.
Every time I hear "Family wants everything done," I want to scream. Those family members should have to spend a day in the same pain and misery as their dying loved one and see how they like it. When you're so close to death that nothing can stop it, you should not only be let go, but helped to go as painlessly as possible.
My dad had a brain haemorrhage, he was totally brain dead but his body was fighting so hard. My sister didn’t want to give up on him but it had been 4 days with no brain activity and I was told even if he did wake up he’d of been seriously disabled so we agreed to let him go. Every day I wonder if we did the right thing because what if he’d of woken up and been fine?
@@katherineelscey9841 You did the right thing. Don't second-guess yourself. Don't play the "what if" game with yourself. You'll eat your heart out. Live your life knowing you and your family did the right thing for your dad. He wouldn't have awakened and been just fine. He would've had serious brain damage and be completely unable do anything for himself. You did the right thing. (I had to make this decision too so I do understand.)
I understand that you would think that from a watcher's perspective, but if you think about it, when it comes to a loved one, it's really hard to let go.
Fr though one of my younger cousins had type one diabetes, her parents who begged the doctors to try everything they could to keep her alive. I remember visiting her in the hospital and the poor kid was begging for me to kill her over and over again, this kept going for about a week or so until she finally died due to infection, her parents were so proud that they “kept fighting for her to live till the end” fucking disgusting. And while I understand some people are unable to let go of someone they love but when it gets to the point where they won’t let them go in peace? That’s just being cruel.
@@katherineelscey9841 i know I’m a year late, but if your father had been brain dead it would have been functionally impossible for him to get up and be fine. The absolute best case scenario if you hadn’t made the choice you had is that he would have been stuck as a vegetable with machines doing his breathing for him. Once you’re brain dead, damage is immediate and permanent. You absolutely made the right choice
I'm a registered nurse who works in a nursing home. This triggered me to hear how nasty that lady's designated LVN/CNA can be. Even if a patient/resident is also verbally abusive, they do not deserve to be treated that horribly, but it also does not give them the right to push people around.
Not a doctor but a family in my town’s house cause on fire and the dad died in the fire, son later died in the hospital, both daughters died in hospital, and mother woke up from a coma to find out her husband and children where all dead.
Please, do not take this negatively, as it is not meant to be an insult. I just want to let you know that "cause on fire" should be "caught on fire", and "where all dead" should be "were all dead".
That's a heartbreaking story. And unfortunately I have one too. In my town (a few years back) we have a train that come through every 4 hours. Well a guy decided to beat the train and tried to cross the track in his car. (This particular rail crossing didn't have the arms that come down to stop motorists. Just had the warning lights) well he wasn't fast enough. He had 3 children in the car, only him and the baby survived because of the carseat. His wife wife had to identify the bodies. He was in a coma for months and lost all memory of the incident.
Bella Veria Wow. That's not heartbreaking so much as infuriating. For the sake of a few seconds patience he killed two children and traumatised a _lot_ of people. It doesn't even matter that there were no barriers, but I bet some random person was blamed over the barriers anyway. I'm starting to believe that most parents genuinely don't care about their children.
The CNA treating a helpless old woman like a naughty child and just leaving her in a corner for hours just for getting messy was the one that hurts,thats pure abuse. I work in a nursing home and have seen many things that are upsetting but nothing like withholding food (that I am aware of)
@@silverscalederg8632 I no longer work at the nursing home I worked at,they accused me of not doing my job because they didn't believe the CNA could use up all the linen in one night(it was during COVID time,we were short on supplies and short on linen,it's happened before but the guy who thought I didn't do my job was new and didn't believe me when I explained it could and had happened before,so I was terminated from by job a week before Christmas
@@blackcat09tails55 oh we go through linnin like crazy and it's hardly even covid we get so many admissions and discharges especially mid week. everyone needs a set amount
Man, it felt good to be able to properly and sincerely cry for the first time in YEARS after having gone through an apathetic depression and having lost a lot of (emotional) feeling and sensitivity to shield myself. Only animals, not humans could evoke genuine emotional responses from me. I know, that most of it is brain chemistry and not my fault, but I am feeling selfish for having felt so miserable, now considering that there is so much worse suffering out there.
You should never discount your feelings out of guilt that others have it worse. You are allowed to feel the way that you feel. I'm sorry to hear about your depression. I can really relate to you and I just hope that you're doing better now. If not, hold on and remember that things will find a way to get better, even if it's just from watching videos like these. And I hope you're holding up well through this current pandemic :)
Olivia DeLucia I am feeling a lot better and life has gone back to normal, but thanks for reaching out ❤️❤️❤️ Wish you all the best and all the strength to get through these troubling times!
When I heard the bit about wanting families to make a patient DNR was heartbreaking for me. Just 10 weeks after we got married, my husband was in the CCU for treatment of congestive heart failure. His heart had stopped twice that day, and in trying to bring him back he suffered multiple broken ribs. When he regained consciousness he was in so much pain with every breath. He had fought for his life for several years, and refused to sign a DNR once we got married. When I heard him say "I'm ready to go", it broke my heart. He had a defibrillator/pacemaker implanted, and when they turned it off I knew it was almost over. When I leaned in to kiss him goodbye I accidentally touched a broken rib, which nearly destroyed me. I hope that people struggling with the issue of letting their loved one die in dignity can be strong enough to let their loved one go and be at peace. My husband suffered so much because he wanted to stay with me as long as possible.
My great grandfather was put on Hospis some time before he passed. They found that he had played violin when he was in his childhood/young adult. He stopped playing (with a few exceptions, I only heard him play 2 times) after World War 2, as he lost some of his hearing from the artillery he commanded. They were able to get a violinist from the Sacramento Symphony to come and play for/ chat with him. We lived 3-4 hours away and I was close with him. We did have family in the area so we would go to visit him fairly often. The hardest part was when he became too dehydrated to talk (he also was hard to understand at that point) and he began tapping out Morse Code... none of us know it but knowing he was trying to communicate with us and being unable to do so was heartbreaking. Especially when we told him we didn't know Morse Code and he stopped tapping for a few minutes.
My grandma who had frontal lobe dementia and lost the ability to communicate. She couldn’t speak,or write. She was diagnosed with dementia in her early 50s and I suspect she had it even earlier. She passed away when I was 18 and she passed a week after I visited her and she didn’t make it to 60. I was so relieved when she passed away, because I knew she was no longer in pain. But I do miss her though and now I only have one living grandparent.
I have to mention this one as it involves one of my best friends. She was diagnosed with non-alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver. She was hospitalized in an ICU for terminally ill patients and was put on the list for liver transplants. She fought so so hard, through feeling horrid and praying a transplant match comes through. I gets a call about 2 weeks in that they found a compatible liver for her and it was being flown/prepped for transplant tomorrow morning. Me, her family, friends, parents, etc were so happy we could burst!!! Then the next morning, i gets another call. The transplant didn't happen as the compatible liver they sent was full of cirrhosis...my good friend lasted about another 5-7 days, and died of a massive heart attack due to her liver sending huge clots all over. This was 4 yrs ago, and i still cry about it sometimes.
The first one made me cry, literally. That poor, sweet baby. I can’t even imagine what she went through, or how horrible it was. She can’t defend herself, she can’t reach out to others and let them know, she might not have been able to form proper sentences yet, so probably couldn’t fully express her pain. I’m 25. I have two conditions that pretty guarantee that I can’t have biological kids (like, can’t get pregnant, and if I somehow do, almost guaranteed that I won’t carry it to term. Which is sad, but even before my diagnosis, I planned on adopting anyways, so I’m still happy and excited to have children some day). I would have GLADLY taken this child in, if her parents didn’t want her. There are SO many people who want children, but for some reason, cannot have them, and then you have evil people like this, who can, but shouldn’t. It really sucks. That poor baby.
The one with the elderly patient who couldn't feed herself and tried in vain to eat a blueberry cake, only to be put in a corner... I felt something in my throat :(
7:59 - I know a race car driver that suffered rhabdomyolosis that resulted in compartment syndrome in both arms & legs that required 2 emergency fasciotomies in all 4 limbs, a lung infection, & full kidney failure in both kidneys all at the same time... Was in the hospital for well over a month. The fact his initial recovery from all that was that quick is nothing short of a miracle. Keep in mind this particular race car driver: *1:* Has suffered from many many hard crashes in his entire career *2:* Has been ill more times than anyone I've ever know *3:* Has been hospitalized more than any race car driver I've ever known *4:* Has suffered from internal bruising & suffered no less than 4 concussions in a span of 5 years (3 of them in less than 2 years) *5.1:* Will suffer from constant physical & mental pain after the absolute worst wreck of his career, one nearly everyone either feared or thought he was killed instantly when the crash happened, which happened in 2012... *5.2:* This racer has already admitted that crash in 2012 has changed him a lot, & a lot of that _not_ for the better as he has changed physically & mentally *5.3:* In addition basically every race fan who knows his career fears/believes he suffers from CTE... Also this comment was made in March 2020 & this guy at that point is only 41 years old. How he is _still_ alive & trying to live life after all that I will *never* know... I really hope the rest of his life is peaceful, as pain-free as it can be, & any & all suffering he has to endure is minimal.
That poor guy with cancer who'd been looking forward to seeing his cat again- I REALLY hope they were allowed to bring his cat in to wherever they moved him to so he could see them again. He deserved that much. I also hope someone was able to take in the cat so the poor kitty didn't end up homeless or get put down after losing their family and home.
I do too, well, cats are not always as quiet as affection as dog is, animals can be very therapeutic. And I would wager a bet that that cat helped him keep his mind off his pain.
I'm so glad to hear the one, where the guy was trying to pass a huge turd and he fell off the toilet. I'm so sorry, but I laughed til I had tears. The others were so sad....it was nice to enjoy one.
My mom was a social worker for 29 years and the amount of abuse on children and the elderly is incredible. She was called to the hospital for many of her clients. 😟
Regarding the issue of the body rejecting transplants, I had artificial cornea transplants to prevent this. My corneas were malformed when I was born. They thought that my body would reject a cornea that had belong to someone else, so I had some that are basically made out of plastic put in. Fun fact - this particular type of cornea is only made in blue. I happen to be born with blue eyes to begin with. That made my eyes look really pretty. If you’re not, you look a bit scary. Also, I wasn’t born with pupils. My pupils are plastic. This means that they can’t expand or contract. It doesn’t cause me any problems, as long as I don’t look in the direction of the sun. Also, I’ve had my cataracts removed. I had glaucoma before I had my cornea transplants, but it cleared up after that. I was born without vision but with light perception. Now, I can see a little bit out of my right eye. The retina detached on my left eye. They might be able to reattach it if stem cell technology improves to that point. I’m pretty happy with what I have now. In case you’re wondering, I was born with peters anomaly. It was pretty much a genetic fluke. I’m a pretty happy person and am glad that I can see some. I think all told with 30+ surgeries and all the care and the travel and everything else, it got up to about $500,000. I now like to say that I have $500,000 on my face that nobody sees. Anyway, I didn’t mean to rant. The body rejecting things that aren’t its own is an issue though.
The story around 21 minutes the blueberry sauce story, hits me really hard. I have lived with my Maternal grandparents since I was 4 (22yrs) and I can't imagine just putting them in a home and leaving them be. They have helped raise me and it is only right now for me to do my best to help make life easier for them.
*listens to stories o children dying and/or suffering* oh that's so sad, those poor kids! *Hears story of lady in nursing home being mistreated by nurse and put in corner for making a mass if her self while trying to eat when the nurse who is supposed to feed her was being a chatty bitch* alright! How'd the onion ninja get into my fortress?!
This is why I 110% support physician assisted suicide. I did my NA Clinicals in a nursing home full of people forced alive, my classmates and I all sat in silence during lunch before one person stood up and said “who else is gonna off themselves before ending up like this” and every single one of us raised our hand. Not being able to say yes or no isn’t living, it’s torture. Quality of life should be considered equally if not more important than quantity of life. Oh and please please please people, make an end of life plan, discuss with lawyers and family what you want if you end up not being able to make your own medical decisions. It’s hard but please do it.
Im on the second story and almost bawled because we had waited so long that when the Dr told me it was Non Hogkin's Lymphoma, I was excited because I didn't know what it was but if we know what it is, we can treat it. My doctor said "I've never seen someone excited when I tell them they have cancer" and I at first figured he was joking. My parents were both medical, and my dumb, 18 year old self hadn't even noticed that they had gone silent. When the Dr left, I wanted to scream and cry, but my mom broke down crying, saying that it could be a mistake. I stayed strong for her but told her no, it wasn't a mistake and that I could beat it, That was 6 years ago, 5 years of remission.
I've always heard stories of parents backing the car into their own children by accident and they always bother me so much. My mind just can't process how that is possible. How does a child crawl under a car, why was a child young enough to crawl left unsupervised. That pain and guilt is just so much, my brain refuses to process that scenario. I can't even cope with the thought
The worst of the one here is that the kid should have lived! They were in the culvert under a driveway, something that should *absolutely* be able to take the weight of a car.
Both parents are sure the kid is with the other parent. Or you look away for a moment because you're human and something else catches your attention and the kid darts away. In short, life.
Kids are faster than you realize. It only takes a second. It's so strange how it doesn't feel like we're darting away that fast or trying really hard to be sneaky when we're little. We just go. Either not bothering to announce what or where we are going or too quiet during a moment of distraction. But the flupside is that maybe our incessant whining is getting ignored because they're trying to focus on something else that needs to be done right that minute. Most kids are impatient to a fault.
The hardest thing I saw was a 32 year old man who had recently been in a freak accident and became paralyzed from the neck down. He was conscious but intubated, mentally all there but had essentially no way to communicate except eye movement, and was not expected to regain any function. I was there when his young children came to visit for the first time and they were scared of him, all tubed up and bandages. I could see the tears in his eyes every time I had to suction his tube, which was clearly excruciating for him. I still think about him.
I like to think listening to sad things and letting yourself cry over it every so often is healthy. Idk if it's true if I'm in some kind of denial, but it makes me feel better about doing it lol
You nurses, doctors and health professionals who deal with death, disease and the callous, criminal neglect and abuse by nursing home staff are made of a special sort of tender toughness.. Hearts of palladium, with character of titanium. God bless you all.
My mom got in a super bad car accident when I was 7 or 8. (I'm 16 now) she broke several ribs, her pelvis, a leg, an arm, both lungs collapsed and she had a concussion. She was airlifted to the hospital. It was so bad you could see the imprint of the other person's liscence plates on the passenger side. This was about a month before Christmas. The first time I seen her was like December 15 or something. She was sitting upright and smiling and talking and laughing and it was awesome. The doctors said she'd never be able to walk again. She came home on I think December 25 (best Christmas present ever tbh) and she was walking with the help of a walker. After a few months she could walk on her own. It was awesome. Everyone was so happy. Shes so lucky to be alive.
The story of the little girl who lost both her parents then died of cancer tells me that the universe is indifferent to our suffering and there's nobody out there who gives a shit about us.
43:13 my dad almost died from a nosebleed. An artery in his sinuses had burst and blood was pouring out his nose and down his throat. My mom took him to the ER but the drs and nurses didn't take the situation seriously until my dad started throwing up blood. They had to stuff 9ft of gauze up his nose with no anesthesia to stop the bleeding, and he was in the hospital for close to a week. He was really close to bleeding to death from a bloody nose.
I am only a fourth of the way through while listening at work and I couldn't help but pause on my project and type this out: Thank you to all medical professionals for what you do. I know sometimes it isn't easy, there's bad patients, something goes horribly wrong, or events are just wrested from your control at the drop of a hat. But you try, you're there and you try your damndest to make sure these people live to see another day, or go home to their loved ones. Some of these stories made me realize the pressure of doing this job: sometimes being the one and only person in the world who cares about the people under your charge. That type of respnsibility is not something one person should have to shoulder alone, but you guys just take it in stride as part of your duty. I cannot thank you all enough for what you do. I cannot thank you for all those who have been helped or even saved by your efforts, they're just too numerous to count. But thank you all regardless. Yours is a hard task, and I know I would be unable to do it. I am just glad that there's someone out there who can.
I work for a nonprofit where we have Disney characters visit children’s hospitals and collaborate with other organizations such as Make-a-Wish. We do an annual show at a children’s hospital and last year was my first time performing. The area of the hospital we usually performed at wasn’t available so we did it in a small playroom on the fifth floor, which wasn’t ideal but that meant that kids who normally wouldn’t have been able to see it were able to this year. As much as I love doing these things, seeing so many children hooked up to machines and looking so visibly ill just broke my heart. I’m just glad we’re able to add some joy into their lives.
Nursing homes can be awful... if I still around, my parents will never see the inside of one of those hell holes... not only do I love my folks and want the best care for them but I also really don’t need a murder charge, then I definitely wouldn’t be able to care for them...
We always said this too. Until my husbands grandmother had 3 strokes and we were physically unable to care for her as she needed 24/7 care and medical attention that we were unable to provide. Putting her in a nursing home was the worst decision we have ever made but we had no other option. Thankfully she was lucky and was cared for very well and all her caregivers were good as gold to her and many of them came to her funeral when she passed 2 years later (of another stroke in her sleep). We did a lot of soul searching and research before we chose what home to place her in and I don’t regret the decision. I never thought we would ever put any of our loved ones in a home, and hopefully we will never have to again, but sometimes that decision has to be made when you can’t give your loved one the care they need at home.
34:00 That mother did not want her family to see her die, and this is very, very common with terminally ill patients. One of my best friends has been an oncology nurse for 35 years, and she says she sees patients hold on until the family has all gone and then pass. The family is grief-stricken, but in reality their loved one waited until everyone left.
There are people who are nurses that make you question why they even wanted to become a nurse in the first place. Like they truly are not intuitive with their care and/or are not exactly doing it for the passion. I've seen this kind of stuff when I was a direct care staff for a group home. Some of the staff were literally hired off the street..probably only because it was the only job they could get. Like clearly, they weren't care giver material. It was SHOCKING.
14:00 - now bear in mind that the lack of appropriate disabled toileting facilities mean that a significant number of disabled people have to do exactly the same thing - dehydrate themselves, hold it, deal with accidents, or not leave the house. Dehydration and holding can cause UTIs, stones, problems with either chronic retention or an overactive bladder etc which can all lead to more serious problems including kidney damage, obstruction, incontinence, sepsis and even death. All for the lack of decent toilets for people using wheelchairs and especially those who can't transfer or who for whatever other reason can't use most disabled toilets. It doesn't help when half the time they're used as store rooms, they're actually inaccessible, there's not enough space to even turn your wheelchair around (if you can even get into it) let alone if you need help to transfer, a hoist, or changing facilities for older children, teens or adults. Would YOU want to lie on the floor of a toilet? Of course not. Aside from the health risk, it's just dirty and humiliating. It drives me crazy. And that's without going into schools which refuse to let kids go to the bathroom during classes. I'm sorry, but I would rather my child end up getting in trouble if they really needed to use the bathroom than had to suffer, be in pain, or have an accident in class. The idea of bathroom passes or that a 2.5 year-old isn't allowed to have an accident at kindergarten/preschool without getting kicked out, or that kids who aren't toilet trained aren't allowed in school is ridiculous. I've seen kids with medical reasons for their incontinence being refused school placements, being told how disgusting they are, and lazy, etc and them and their parents being told they just have to "work harder" to "potty train" a child who lacks the ability to fully feel what is going on in their body - and therefore is incapable of becoming continent. It's a disability and the fact that kids are being discriminated against, and are being taught that, like this poor woman, they're not allowed to use the bathroom when they want to, being punished for a disability they can't help... that's messed up.
I second that statement, in 2017 I got hit by a car and was in a wheelchair for a few months, after aboit a week of holding whenever i was out, i ended up wearing adult diapers when I went out due to the lack of suitable facilities, and as a consequence, that same lack of facilities resulted in me being forced to sit in a wet diaper for most of the day until I got home, still better than being constantly dehydrated though (but not much better) Using a regular public toilet is nearly impossible, and disabled/accessible toilets are few and far between in my city I can't imagine how people who are permanently disabled deal with that problem without going insane
@@mwbgaming28 And the thing is, if you're someone who has to use incontinence products/protective underwear (a preferred phrase generally than adult diapers, as many people feel infantalised by that phrase, even though it's the most common one used by the public) but are also disabled and unable to stand for long enough, there's no way to change those if you're out of the house because they sure as hell don't make fully accessible disabled toilets. So frustrating.
@@JustAnotherBuckyLover thankfully for me it was only temporary (full feeling in that area, and full control of continence, but complete inability to stand or balance due to injury) but I can tell you it sucked, especially since it was during summer and I was constantly drinking water to avoid heatstroke (fuck that life) as for the infantisation, I didn't really care much about that, my logic at the time was call it what you want, I had a medical reason for using it I now get a bit angry whenever I see a business without a ramp or disabled toilet, or that requires you to first buy something to use it, even though I am no longer dependant on such facilities it still pisses me off
The only moment I remember from my first grade year was watching my great grandpa die. It was sad but strange because I knew he wanted to die. The pain of him breathing was too much and his lungs were too dry. I remember how sad the doctor was being that a whole family- including me, in first grade at the time- has to watch a close family member die. It was strange. I was used to my family being gone though as I live in a huge military family. But this was different. I would never see him again. But it didn’t hurt me. I watched him painfully die but I was comforted that he got what he wanted and his pain was gone. I don’t know how to describe the feeling. I felt nothing. Not happiness, not sadness, not anger, not love. Just nothing. I was there and that was it. It was the strangest feeling I’ve ever gone through. I remember the doctor was really sad about that as he knew that the hospital could’ve done more but they didn’t because of the money, and I respect that decision. He got what he wanted and that’s okay. But the doctor kept on trying to pay us because of how he thought we felt, but we kept denying it because he was so nice. I never got to go to his funeral, but I get to see his ashes every year. My great grandma is still alive (but has cancer which is a concern) and she has the ashes. I get to see her every year. Great grandma also wasn’t sad when great grandpa died because she is a heavy Christian. I was Christian at the time, but now I’m not. But I’m still not bothered. But the doctor was really sad. I feel bad for him because of what he thought we went through when we didn’t go through many feelings. My family and I had no feelings. We felt empty. Nothing. But that’s my story of having a doctor get really sad.
My dad, after my mom passed this last June said something to me that has stuck. He was an EMT before I was born and had to switch to a different career to support the family. Anyways, the thing he said he learned and realized, was that there are worse things than death itself. The suffering you have to watch people go through. In my mind, I've come to the realization that I see death as pure unconditional freedom. Freedom from all the pain that is happening in a human. All the restrictions and chains that tie us to a physical body that is damaged or giving out on us. Just to let go and be free from the restraints that our body keeps us in and finally to be at peace. Yeah, I'd say there are fates worse than death itself.
The stories of elderies being left to essentially fend for themselves break me. My mum is Thai and I grew up very close to her. The idea of her being left in the street or to die in a hospital alone is horrific. When my mum’s stepdad died, the whole family in Thailand got together so they could say goodbye to his body. Not very sure how common it is but they had him laid out on a floor bed like he was peacefully sleeping, then everyone was given a turn to hold his hand and say goodbye. Family is very important to us.
This isn't really related to the question, but I figured it might make someone laugh after all those terrible stories (terrible as in "oh my god I can't believe people actually went through that," not like badly written or something). Anyway, a family friend works in a nursing home, and has talked a little bit about some of the residents. One day he told us about a lady that believes she has a midget living in her closet. Apparently it only comes out at night. Apparently she charges it rent. So yeah, this little old lady believes there is a midget living in her closet who pays rent to her.
@@SashaMkai You're welcome. I'm glad my second-hand story of a little old lady charging the (as far as we know) imaginary midget in her closet rent was able to help you.
The one escaping sex slavery, it was stated she got there because of drug addiction and the family acted like they didn’t care. I can almost understand. My family has gone through hell with someone that used to be close to us. This person threatened her dying father, assaulted her mother shortly after her father’s death and assaulted her nephew. It was constantly tolerated because her mom kept hoping, and hoping that she would get well. She wouldn’t leave, and being that it was California, couldn’t be forced to leave, even though she assaulted her nephew and, at this point threatened her father. Because her mother was old enough, we were able to get a restraining order to ‘protect a senior citizen’. The restraining order forced her out of the house. We’d have gangsters and mobsters (literally) coming by and threatening the house because she owed them money. It got to the point where we realized it was no longer worth approaching the people she hung out with and asking them to not associate with her because she’d find new people. After several threats from her associates wanting money she owed them, all ties were cut. All ties. Her mother Her children Her brother Everyone she knew will not see her anymore. We wouldn’t even know if she were abducted. It would break her mother’s heart to hear something like that happened to her but she’s all out of tears. All that to say, what happened to that poor woman in this video is terrible, but she brought herself there and her family may have been abused and ripped off so much they were out of tears and beyond emotion.
Hippa says you cant talk about patients cases by name. Im CPT and as long as the patients name or identity is not revealed,your ok to speak about it fyi
my mother had that. she was on iv strength antibiotics as a last resort before they actually would have to hook her up to iv, and with how weak her immune system was getting we were worried she might actually diw
I am a firm believer that some people wait to die when their family is gone to spare then the heartbreak. The day my grandfather died ( he was in hospice) I had been counting his breath every few hours (I work in the medical field) and noticed a clear decrease in breaths/m, we knew he was not long for this world. For some reason I end up getting into a fight with my uncle and we leave. It took us about 10 minutes to get home and 5 more to get in bed. My head hadn't touched the pillow before my uncle was calling to tell me he had passed. No one can tell me that he didn't wait for my dad (his son), my mom, my husband, and I to leave... no one.
My grandmother died in 2019 at the age of 92. We went to see her about a week before she died in the nursing home (In Finland) me, my mother and my older sister went inside and heard a weak voice call out "mother, mother!" she just sat there in a wheelchair and called for her mother who had died in early 80's. She looked so small and frail (she used to be a little obese) and when she grabbed my mothers arm and said her name and "I wan't to go home" I started to cry. It was so sad and depressing, I have never seen her like that. She had dementia but it worsened after she fell and hit her head in the nursing home. She barely ate. My mother had to tell her me and my sister's names and she just looked at us with this puzzled look. Dementia is hell, I wouldn't wish for it to anyone.
I was a nurse for 32 years. I have two cases that will forever be in my mind. One was a 33 year old alcoholic admitted to our floor,my patient. His skin and eyes were bright yellow from alcoholic hepatitis and his liver was failing. He was going into DT's. Administered IV Valium. He was cognizant of everything going on and decided he was going to leave so he could get some alcohol to feel better. He started fighting us and we had to restrain him, more Valium, still fighting! Cursing us with every breath. I was taken off the floor just to care for him. After being there about 3 hours the hemorrhaging started, he was vomiting and pooping blood faster than we could administer the transfusions going into both feet and both arms. Couldn't stabilize him and he died about 2 hours before shift ended. He had never married and had lived with his mother all his life. She had him late in life and he was all she had. I sat and held her while she cried and blamed herself for enabling his alcoholism. It was so sad. He died a horrific death. The other was an 80 year old who was being cared for by her daughter at home. When she came to our floor from the ER, none of us could believe the condition she was in. Skin and bone with security's ulcers on both hips and coccyx that were to the bone. It took me and another nurse the entire shift to clean her ulcers. That's when we realized you could actually see the bone. At some point she had broken a hip and her leg was frozen horizontally across her body. We had to leave the rails down and place pillows on the bedside table to support her leg. This poor lady had not even been treated for the broken hip! The worst case of neglect I had ever seen. Her daughter had kept her at home for her SS check. I don't think she had been bathed in years. The smell was horrendous. The dr. derided the black, neurotic tissue around the bedside and from hip bone to hip bone was just an open wound that you could see the bones. We had to clean an dress the wound every 8 hours and it took two of us almost the whole shift just to care for her. We had to fully dress,gowns, gloves, masks every time we went in her room. She lived about 5 days. We were told the daughter was charged with cri.final neglect, as she should have been!!!
I've always loved these videos but this one today might have done me in. I broke my back in 2017 in a car accident and had to learn how to walk again. It was a very taxing situation and essentially the worst part of my life. The man who broke his back around 8:50.. I just can't imagine having a glimmer of hope taken away from me by someone transporting me. I literally just cannot put into words how bad that hurts me on the inside. I told my friends that if anything ever happened to me and i broke my back again that they are to kill me. there is a legitimate plan for them to do so. I have no words, I have no words to describe the overwhelming pain that I have for this man. There's no way I could ever participate in life again if that would have happened to me. I would have begged constantly. daily, to be put out of my misery. I just- I've never read one of these that has affected me so much.
Every mention of neglect just reconfirms I can’t be a nurse because my standards are too high for other people and it makes me too angry… I would probably end up physically assaulting someone for failing to do their job properly within a week. And NG tubes are the worst! I feel so terrible for anyone who pulls one out in confusion because they’re absolute torment to get in but when they’re ready to come out the relief is immense. Taking one out before it’s time is just going to make your condition far worse and have to deal with immense physical pain getting a new one in.
A new kid at my school who was almost 7 feet tall was an aspiring athlete who had a lot of promise in basketball. He got hit by a car and broke some bones in his back and his neck and he will never play basketball again. Honestly, I thought he was an alright kid, never done any wrong to me. To know that you’ll never be able to do what you enjoy again is a fate worse than death.
This actually just happened to me last week. I'm a vet tech with a housecall clinic. My boss (the vet) and I had been helping one of our clients with her dog's chronic musculoskeletal issues. He was a five-year-old English Mastiff mix. He would have incidents of falling and being unable to get back up for some time (he weighed close to 130 pounds and his owner is an older woman who can't lift that much weight by herself). He had chronic hip weakness and hypothyroidism (look it up). Then he suddenly refused to eat. He was even refusing his favorite treats, so he wasn't getting his thyroid medication- there was no way this woman could safely get a pill down this dog's throat by hand. She called us last week because of this and was concerned about bloating. He was undeweight, though he didn't look it because his abdomen was so distended. He was having some trouble breathing. We did an abdomenocentesis (used a needle to draw fluid/gas from the abdominal cavity) and drew out really nasty-looking fluid. We got the owner's consent and ran this guy to the vet teaching hospital a couple towns north, about 30 miles. They found a tumor in the right side of his heart, which was causing heart failure. There was nothing that could be done for him. It had looked so hopeful, though. He was bright, alert, responsive, fully ambulatory, and still as sweet as could be. Aside from the increased respiratory effort, his vitals were normal. But it's those hidden little things that have the biggest impact.
Still a vet tech... He wasn't technically my patient, but... Well, he was my baby boy. I'm talking about my cat, BTW. Frisco. I had adopted him when he was about a year old and had him ten years to the day. About three months before he died, he had developed a mass under his tongue that had ulcerated, gotten infected (because cat mouths are literally the cesspools of nature), and started to smell awful. I got him on antibiotics and that cleared up the infection. Then, two months later, the smell came back, he was drooling, and he couldn't eat very well. We took him to the teaching hospital when I noticed the mass under his tongue. At the teaching hospital, he got a feeding tube (esophageal-gastric or EG) and they biopsied the mass. It was squamous cell carcinoma, and the tumor was inoperable because of its location (to get a proper margin, they would have had to remove his tongue and entire lower jaw- that was unacceptable and everyone knew it). He had to be on a liquid diet and get pain meds through the feeding tube. Two weeks later, his best buddy, my 16-year-old female Siamese, died suddenly from kidney failure. I think Frisco was more concerned for her than himself, because he started to decline pretty quick after that. I got home from work one afternoon and found him with blood pouring from his mouth. The tumor had burst and his tongue was pretty much severed. I couldn't do anything by myself, so I called my mom (a former veterinarian) to get her to come home early so we could put Frisco down. We took him outside (I had promised him he would die in the sunshine) and gave him a double-dose of his pain meds. He relaxed and started purring, like he knew the pain would be over soon. Then we gave him an IV injection of acepromazine (heavy-duty sedative, overdoses can be lethal). He died in my arms. It's been almost four years now, and I still haven't really gotten over it.
I'm not a doc. But this is a story about my brothers' dad (we have different dads) and one of my brother's drinking buddies. It's just so fricked and I can't imagine how docs and nurses deal with this. Anyway. It's a quiet night, and my mum and I are laughing about something and her phone rang. It was my oldest brother and his wife. He said "Mum. Dad got into a crash." And the entire room fell silent. I remember the way my mum's face fell. My mum asked "What happened?" My brother replied "Dad was driving to fill up his motorbike. And he was with *insert name of younger brother's drinking buddy*. They got hit by an 10 wheeler. *Drinking buddy* died on site. But dad is being transported by ambulance. *Younger brother* is in the ambulance with him. They're being transported to the major county hospital" My mum couldn't say anything but "Call me back when you get to the hospital. And tell him that I have nothing against him. Tell him I still respect him." And my brother said "Okay. Bye." And hung up. I hugged my mum and my mum seemed so shocked. About an hour later we get another call "Mum. Dad won't make it. The doctors have coded him about 4 times. The doctors are saying he won't be able to make it. Is there anything else you want to say to him?" My mum sighed and she said "Exactly what I said before. I have nothing against him." The phone was passed to my older brother "Mum. Dad has so many times in him. I told him I was there for him when we were in the ambulance. All he could say was "uuuhh" *equivalent of yeah in Khmer* he's gone mum." My mum spoke some more, I don't remember exactly what she said. But my brothers' dad was on a ventilator, pieces of bone poking through his pelvis, he was covered in tubes. (From what I was told). My older brother had to come and stay with us for months because he was so fricked up about it. It was so heart breaking to witness through the phone. I couldn't imagine how it would be for my brothers or my brothers' dad. The fact that doctors have to deal with crap like this just makes them the most amazing people ever.
I listened to the stories about dementia and remembered something from several years ago: I used to volunteer at a nursing home that had chapel services every Wednesday for anyone who wanted to go (they were for anyone who could loosely be considered a Christian, whether Catholic, Protestant, or anything else they could possibly be), and I would usually help take people who were interested to the services. Every time, the chaplain, Ellen, would ask if anyone had any prayer requests, and every time, one of the residents (I still remember her name-- Charlotte) would answer her by saying "my mother". Her mother died a long time ago. Chaplain Ellen knew, but she would always pray for Charlotte's mother anyway. Dementia/Alzheimer's (I think they're the same thing?) is horrible.
My mum used to be a HCA with dementia patients. She told me of a time where she broke the rules and told a lie to an elderly lady with dementia. The lady was agitated and walking around at night, wondering when her aunt was going to pick her up. Mum consoled her by saying they had a call, and aunt was running late, would be there in the morning, and asked that she sleep the night. And the neglected NICU babies is so sad. My sister has twins in NICU, and visits them everyday when her partner gets home from work, and a woman pulled them to one side to talk about possible neglect. Babies' dad blew up, saying he doesn't want to keep distracting nurses from looking after other babies, they come every day, and that they weren't told that they could feed them, or change their nappies. The woman was shocked, and let them go.
21:59-23:16 makes me so fucking mad. My mom is in a nursing home right now and if I found out the nurses treated her like the nurse treated this woman, I'd be in prison
I had a friend die from esophageal varices but he wasn’t alcoholic. He was extremely obese though. The story from his wife was very similar to that one. Very bloody and chaotic as they tried to get him out of his house and then into theatre. Him struggling and fighting them in his moments of conscious-ness when they were trying to resuscitate him. Very sad and frightening end to man that was quite gentle and amazingly giftedly intelligent.
I am also pretty sure people wait to die until all or almost all the family is gone. One of my coworkers told me about how she was staying by her dad's side with her step mom and left to feed her dogs and let them out and get something really quick and come back. She didn't live that far away from their house, maybe 15 minutes, but as soon as she got to her house her step mom called her and told her he had died. My mom also died almost two years ago now. My fiance and I along with my older sisters and some of their kids went to the hospital every day to see her. Her sisters and brother also came. My dad stayed in the hospital with her. She died after almost everyone had gone home, the only people there were my dad and her youngest brother. I regret not being there until the end with her.
People who pass on after family have gone home have finished their assignments here on earth. They have held it together for a last visit. Once the family has left they can let go and step into eternity in peace.
I've survived multiple things I shouldn't have. Doctors missed my fractured skull after I fell out of a cart at 2yo. I have brain damage, and had 2w of seizures. Car wreck 2 door Saturn vs 18 wheeler. Car was shredded the broken seat stayed in place by some miracle, and the semi jack kniffed and we went under and hit the rear axle and all somehow survived. Survived a suicide attempt. Barely missed getting hit by a speeding car. Now I'm 21, disabled, seeing specialists as my doctor's think I have hEDS POTS Fibromyalgia and Gastroparisis. I also have CPTSD and BPD. I have lost every dream I ever had. Wanted to be an EOD Tech in the Marine Corps, but my mental illnesses fucked that for me, wanted to be a professional ballerina, but my great-grandmother got dementia and my dad wouldn't let my grandparents take over payments for it and now I can't dance cause I pass out and my joints do stay in place, wanted to do DCI, but my stepdad being unable to keep his hands to himself, and my mother choosing him over me and shipping me cross country kinda killed that, then I wanted to have a big family, thankfully I have my son, but since my health went to shit and my body couldn't handle another pregnancy, now my best friends daughter tested positive for Corona, which means my son and my family has been exposed, and they have asthma, and my health is absolute shit... So that's my life rn.
I am so sorry to hear what you're going through. I hope you are holding up well, and if you ever need to talk, I am here. Try to remind yourself that things will eventually get better and try to stay as strong as you can. Many well wishes are being sent your way, for you and your family.
honestly i would rather die than live through some sort of painful horrible disease for years and suffer a slow, painful death, like i’d rather die at 60 then die at 80 after suffering for years
8:55 Sometime October 2019 my grandma (66) was in a rehab center after a surgery, not completely sure what exactly they did, but I know they had put metal plates into her neck so they had to cut it open. She has trouble walking already as she has polio, so this obviously didn't help. When the nurses were helping bathe her, she needed her walker to walk around, and sit on as she dried off. She asked the nurse if the walker was locked into position, so it didn't move around, and she said yes. So she goes to sit down, and it wasn't locked, she slipped and basically came out in a worst condition than before surgery. My mom thought about suing, but we didn't. Safe to say we'll never go back there for anything. And to you nurses, you knew exactly what you did, and you were too lazy to lock it. Nice job.
Alcoholic here, 10 years sober. I had the same thing happen to me. My esophagus had a huge tear that was pouring blood into my stomach. I threw up buckets of blood. It is terrifying. I almost bled to death because the first doctor misdiagnosed me with a bleeding ulcer. 2 days later my breathing became really difficult. I could barely draw breath. Went back to the Er and they found a giant tear in my esophagus. They cauterized it. I was told if I had waiting a couple more hours to come in I’d be dead from internal bleeding.
A friend once said to me, is that ppls be fine just living there life doing everything day things, then they go to the doctor and like a week later u see them laying in the hospital with tubes everywhere, :-(his point is u be a ok until u go to the hospital)-: that's crazy but I have seen that happen b4
I had. A similar accident when an lna dropped me from a stretcher. Broke 2 Vertabrae, I thought I could sue but evidently 2 broken vertebrae is not worth a lawyers time!
I used to caregive and let me tell you that neglect and anger and understaffing is just par for the course. Yes, many people care and do good work but many don't. It's just a mess and there's a constant need for more caregivers and nurses.
It’s a dental story but oh well. A few years back I had the get a chipped tooth removed after it had been loose for a year. The dentist put me on laughing gas while he removed the piece of tooth. Anyways that’s how I found out I’m immune to laughing gas.
Everything every poster has said about dementia is true. I hope to God you never have to go through this with someone, but I also thank God this person left a incredibly detailed medical directive that left me with no guilt that I made a decision to let my parent die. I lived with this for nine years and I lost her long before she actually passed away. Thank God for the Hospice people and the peace we gave us all.
My now ex husband had that alcohol abuse stomach hemorrhage it was horrible but he made it. Sort of wish he hadn’t as he drained my bank account of $187k and ran off with an 18 year old. He was 42. I was in a rehab from an huge abdominal surgery. What an ass****.
How could that nurse leave that poor lady in the corner, embarrassed and hungry?! Made me cry. People are so cruel. I hope she steps on a Lego 2x a day!
I had to give my mom permission to die when she said, "I can't leave here yet." I told her everything was going to be fine, that I would be fine, I have never told a bigger lie in my life. She smiled and squeezed my hand and died ten minutes later. Thank every single one of you who has shown kindness and understanding to a dementia patient.
This comment literally made me break down in tears, I can’t even imagine going through that I love my mom to death and I haven’t seen her in well over a year because of covid and my biggest fear is that something happens to my parents while I have no way of being there
I’m really sorry about that, to both of you. Every time I hear of somebody dying, one of the first things I think is that if they were in pain, they aren’t anymore. They are living happily in heaven, and they are taking care of any pets or other family members you have lost. My great grandmother is taking care of all my lost pets right now.
I know someone who was a ER nurse and she used to tell the unsaveable patients " it's ok you can go now" and they would typically pass away shortly. Only time she broke this was telling her own mother to hang on so her sister and nephew could say goodbye.
@@mynamesimm Nikki one my brother said on mom
Very sorry for your loss. Both my grandmothers had dementia. (Unf/F)ortunately, I was not present for either of them passing. Either way, I don't know how I'd have handled such. The ones who handle it well must be tough mofos.
"So it feels like shes getting a second chance with a real mom." That really touched me. I've always believed that children who pass always go back to live the life they deserve.
asheresque lol nope. Those kids are just dead. No heaven, no reincarnation.
You must be fun to hang out at parties
I once heard a song that refered to children who pass as narrowed angels and have stuck with both the idea that are barrowed angels too pure for this world and that they can be reborn to fulfill the life they never got to live the first time. Still, I can't understand how anyone could abuse something as pure and innocent as a child or an animal.
Matthew 19:14
But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.”
@@Chipswitch22 Of course you have that profile picture.
I just couldn't stop vomiting throughout my pregnancy. Lost weight to the point the doctors were very worried and admitted to hospital at 29 weeks. Potassium was 2.3 and amongst other stuff, so they put in a CVC into my jugular.About a week later I spiked a 40.2 degree fever and my mum was told I was dying of sepsis (CRP at 230mg/L) and they would preform an emergency C-Section. My baby got into the NICU and I into the ICU, my heart stopped twice, I was about 35kg after delivery and holding on by the edge of a knife......We both made it! My son is 11 month old now and just started saying Mama.
Aw I really liked this story
heartwarming to read amongst the sadder stories x
I glad you’re both doing well now:)
That’s wholesome
I cried a little ^^
In response to the hypothetical family who wouldn’t make their loved one a DNR- I was 22 years old (I’m 23 now, but this was only 4 months ago...) and my mother was found unresponsive with a blood sugar of 800 on her bedroom floor. They flew her out. The same night she reached the big city hospital, her ICU doctor called me. She asked me if my mom would want to be resuscitated and I broke down. We are from a small town, and my mom was very close with the head administrator of our local hospital. For years my mom had said, “Kelly!! If something happens, pull the damn plug, because I don’t think my kids will be strong enough to do it!” With that in mind, I gave verbal consent for a DNR and written consent the following day while I was by her side, as life support kept her going. PLEASE, have this conversation with your loved ones, especially your parents!! My mother is pulling through, she will never be the same, and has to live in a nursing home for the rest of her life (she will only be 50 in August,) but had she have coded and that DNR was needed, I know damn good and well I did what she would have wanted.
L Elliott what an awful thing for you to go through. It’s good that you had had that conversation previously and were able to follow her wishes, it takes a lot of strength to do that. I’m glad she’s pulling through (although it must be incredibly difficult knowing she won’t fully recover). Thinking of you
My mother always said she never wanted her children to see her pass. After a few days, my brothers and I decided to all get some decent rest other than just napping on each other's shoulder. That night was when she passed, our dad was holding her hand and talking to her as she passed. I'm glad she wasn't alone.
“Hospital trips are funny, the first week everybody comes to visit you, but after that guests seem to taper off dramatically.” I learned this cold hard truth when I got chronically ill. People who used to check up on me no longer have any idea how I’m doing. I got worse and none of them know because they stopped contacting me. At some point a sick person becomes “boring”, I suppose. It’s fun when you can come in and be all nice and wish them good luck, knowing they’ll be back in a week. But once it’s chronic? Nah. Not worth it. :/ Apparently.
Actually I been in the opposite situation having love ones be chronic and it's just hard going to see someone you care about getting worse... I'll admit being weak and not going because they were ok in my head. Seeing them in that situation hurt me and made me realize they were dying and there was nothing I could do about it. It was kind of a if I don't see it or think about it it's not happening situation and when I look back I do feel guilty for not being strong enough for them.
I really hope you read this if your still chronic people do probably care about you and love it's just hard to be there and watch someone slowly fade away. And I hope you don't and you recover.
Know that feeling
Its more that they have their own lives to get back to. I wouldn't want people to be visiting me all the time if they've still got things to worry about, they should enjoy the things I couldnt. And especially in an age where communication couldnt be easier, having someone in the room isn't a necessity
@@geminiadastra8662 I mean, they don’t have to visit *all the time*, but just every once in a while would be nice. Hell, maybe just for my birthday, that’s fine. And of course thank the lord for the internet and smartphones, but even through that some people kind of just quit contacting you. Maybe it’s easy to think “then those people aren’t worth it, think about the people who do” but when you’ve been friends with someone for 15 years and then in time you kind of don’t exist anymore, that stings. …yes I may have a personal problem, haha.
39:16 “...and a big 💩 protruding from my- ”
*Narrator.exe has stopped responding*
haha lol ty
i thought my pc was getting a bluescreen lmao
Scared the hell out of me because it was playing in the background
*my-y-y-y-y-y-y-* fully in tact
Ok good I thought my phone was breaking
Every time I hear "Family wants everything done," I want to scream. Those family members should have to spend a day in the same pain and misery as their dying loved one and see how they like it. When you're so close to death that nothing can stop it, you should not only be let go, but helped to go as painlessly as possible.
My dad had a brain haemorrhage, he was totally brain dead but his body was fighting so hard. My sister didn’t want to give up on him but it had been 4 days with no brain activity and I was told even if he did wake up he’d of been seriously disabled so we agreed to let him go. Every day I wonder if we did the right thing because what if he’d of woken up and been fine?
@@katherineelscey9841 You did the right thing. Don't second-guess yourself. Don't play the "what if" game with yourself. You'll eat your heart out. Live your life knowing you and your family did the right thing for your dad. He wouldn't have awakened and been just fine. He would've had serious brain damage and be completely unable do anything for himself. You did the right thing. (I had to make this decision too so I do understand.)
I understand that you would think that from a watcher's perspective, but if you think about it, when it comes to a loved one, it's really hard to let go.
Fr though one of my younger cousins had type one diabetes, her parents who begged the doctors to try everything they could to keep her alive. I remember visiting her in the hospital and the poor kid was begging for me to kill her over and over again, this kept going for about a week or so until she finally died due to infection, her parents were so proud that they “kept fighting for her to live till the end” fucking disgusting. And while I understand some people are unable to let go of someone they love but when it gets to the point where they won’t let them go in peace? That’s just being cruel.
@@katherineelscey9841 i know I’m a year late, but if your father had been brain dead it would have been functionally impossible for him to get up and be fine. The absolute best case scenario if you hadn’t made the choice you had is that he would have been stuck as a vegetable with machines doing his breathing for him. Once you’re brain dead, damage is immediate and permanent. You absolutely made the right choice
My heart broke to pieces at the lady who tried to feed herself the blueberry dessert
Same. I hope that nurse got fired, or at least reprimanded.
In a perfect world fired and perhaps criminally charged and revoked license.
F#k that Nurse! I hope She winds up the same way some day!
I'm a registered nurse who works in a nursing home. This triggered me to hear how nasty that lady's designated LVN/CNA can be. Even if a patient/resident is also verbally abusive, they do not deserve to be treated that horribly, but it also does not give them the right to push people around.
Not a doctor but a family in my town’s house cause on fire and the dad died in the fire, son later died in the hospital, both daughters died in hospital, and mother woke up from a coma to find out her husband and children where all dead.
Please, do not take this negatively, as it is not meant to be an insult. I just want to let you know that "cause on fire" should be "caught on fire", and "where all dead" should be "were all dead".
@@makenziecely bruh
That's a heartbreaking story. And unfortunately I have one too.
In my town (a few years back) we have a train that come through every 4 hours. Well a guy decided to beat the train and tried to cross the track in his car. (This particular rail crossing didn't have the arms that come down to stop motorists. Just had the warning lights) well he wasn't fast enough. He had 3 children in the car, only him and the baby survived because of the carseat. His wife wife had to identify the bodies. He was in a coma for months and lost all memory of the incident.
Bella Veria Wow. That's not heartbreaking so much as infuriating. For the sake of a few seconds patience he killed two children and traumatised a _lot_ of people. It doesn't even matter that there were no barriers, but I bet some random person was blamed over the barriers anyway.
I'm starting to believe that most parents genuinely don't care about their children.
Oh no, that poor woman. How do you live on?
The CNA treating a helpless old woman like a naughty child and just leaving her in a corner for hours just for getting messy was the one that hurts,thats pure abuse.
I work in a nursing home and have seen many things that are upsetting but nothing like withholding food (that I am aware of)
I couldn't imagine working in a nursing home seems too...slow paced. Kiddos are where it's at
@@silverscalederg8632 I no longer work at the nursing home I worked at,they accused me of not doing my job because they didn't believe the CNA could use up all the linen in one night(it was during COVID time,we were short on supplies and short on linen,it's happened before but the guy who thought I didn't do my job was new and didn't believe me when I explained it could and had happened before,so I was terminated from by job a week before Christmas
@@blackcat09tails55 oh we go through linnin like crazy and it's hardly even covid we get so many admissions and discharges especially mid week. everyone needs a set amount
Why are there so many nursing home neglect/abuse stories?
This is why I don't want to be human
I don't want to be sharing a species with people like in the first story.
Found the Martian
Do you really think people like them can condemn the entirely of humanity?
Just because there are bad humans, doesn’t mean you are suddenly cursed with it too. Every species has bad ones. I get what you’re saying, though.
ok boomer
Fellow furry? Hi! What’s your sona?
39:18 I thought my phone broke
Glad I am not the only one
I was falling asleep and heard that and i was like wtf😂
same
But who's St Get's boyfriend.
It happens a lot
Man, it felt good to be able to properly and sincerely cry for the first time in YEARS after having gone through an apathetic depression and having lost a lot of (emotional) feeling and sensitivity to shield myself. Only animals, not humans could evoke genuine emotional responses from me.
I know, that most of it is brain chemistry and not my fault, but I am feeling selfish for having felt so miserable, now considering that there is so much worse suffering out there.
You should never discount your feelings out of guilt that others have it worse. You are allowed to feel the way that you feel. I'm sorry to hear about your depression. I can really relate to you and I just hope that you're doing better now. If not, hold on and remember that things will find a way to get better, even if it's just from watching videos like these. And I hope you're holding up well through this current pandemic :)
Olivia DeLucia I am feeling a lot better and life has gone back to normal, but thanks for reaching out ❤️❤️❤️
Wish you all the best and all the strength to get through these troubling times!
When I heard the bit about wanting families to make a patient DNR was heartbreaking for me. Just 10 weeks after we got married, my husband was in the CCU for treatment of congestive heart failure. His heart had stopped twice that day, and in trying to bring him back he suffered multiple broken ribs. When he regained consciousness he was in so much pain with every breath. He had fought for his life for several years, and refused to sign a DNR once we got married. When I heard him say "I'm ready to go", it broke my heart. He had a defibrillator/pacemaker implanted, and when they turned it off I knew it was almost over. When I leaned in to kiss him goodbye I accidentally touched a broken rib, which nearly destroyed me. I hope that people struggling with the issue of letting their loved one die in dignity can be strong enough to let their loved one go and be at peace. My husband suffered so much because he wanted to stay with me as long as possible.
the transfer team should’ve been sued for that story
My great grandfather was put on Hospis some time before he passed. They found that he had played violin when he was in his childhood/young adult. He stopped playing (with a few exceptions, I only heard him play 2 times) after World War 2, as he lost some of his hearing from the artillery he commanded. They were able to get a violinist from the Sacramento Symphony to come and play for/ chat with him. We lived 3-4 hours away and I was close with him. We did have family in the area so we would go to visit him fairly often. The hardest part was when he became too dehydrated to talk (he also was hard to understand at that point) and he began tapping out Morse Code... none of us know it but knowing he was trying to communicate with us and being unable to do so was heartbreaking. Especially when we told him we didn't know Morse Code and he stopped tapping for a few minutes.
Damn that's a terrifying thought; to not be able to talk to your loved ones when you're probably terrified. Hope your doing alright man.
My grandma who had frontal lobe dementia and lost the ability to communicate. She couldn’t speak,or write. She was diagnosed with dementia in her early 50s and I suspect she had it even earlier. She passed away when I was 18 and she passed a week after I visited her and she didn’t make it to 60. I was so relieved when she passed away, because I knew she was no longer in pain. But I do miss her though and now I only have one living grandparent.
The one with the mom who can’t remember her kid dying is messed up. She’s in real life purgatory
I have to mention this one as it involves one of my best friends. She was diagnosed with non-alcoholic cirrhosis of the liver. She was hospitalized in an ICU for terminally ill patients and was put on the list for liver transplants. She fought so so hard, through feeling horrid and praying a transplant match comes through. I gets a call about 2 weeks in that they found a compatible liver for her and it was being flown/prepped for transplant tomorrow morning. Me, her family, friends, parents, etc were so happy we could burst!!! Then the next morning, i gets another call. The transplant didn't happen as the compatible liver they sent was full of cirrhosis...my good friend lasted about another 5-7 days, and died of a massive heart attack due to her liver sending huge clots all over. This was 4 yrs ago, and i still cry about it sometimes.
Yup. Can relate lost a really good friend too lung /breast cancer still upsets me sometimes today
The first one made me cry, literally. That poor, sweet baby. I can’t even imagine what she went through, or how horrible it was. She can’t defend herself, she can’t reach out to others and let them know, she might not have been able to form proper sentences yet, so probably couldn’t fully express her pain.
I’m 25. I have two conditions that pretty guarantee that I can’t have biological kids (like, can’t get pregnant, and if I somehow do, almost guaranteed that I won’t carry it to term. Which is sad, but even before my diagnosis, I planned on adopting anyways, so I’m still happy and excited to have children some day). I would have GLADLY taken this child in, if her parents didn’t want her. There are SO many people who want children, but for some reason, cannot have them, and then you have evil people like this, who can, but shouldn’t. It really sucks. That poor baby.
Anyone else start crying from some stories
The one with the elderly patient who couldn't feed herself and tried in vain to eat a blueberry cake, only to be put in a corner... I felt something in my throat :(
i teared up a little
the last time i cried this hard, my cat had only died 5 days ago
I don’t really cry but they were sad
I had to stop before I did. I was putting on makeup while listening (the video autoplayed to this video).
7:59 - I know a race car driver that suffered rhabdomyolosis that resulted in compartment syndrome in both arms & legs that required 2 emergency fasciotomies in all 4 limbs, a lung infection, & full kidney failure in both kidneys all at the same time... Was in the hospital for well over a month. The fact his initial recovery from all that was that quick is nothing short of a miracle.
Keep in mind this particular race car driver:
*1:* Has suffered from many many hard crashes in his entire career
*2:* Has been ill more times than anyone I've ever know
*3:* Has been hospitalized more than any race car driver I've ever known
*4:* Has suffered from internal bruising & suffered no less than 4 concussions in a span of 5 years (3 of them in less than 2 years)
*5.1:* Will suffer from constant physical & mental pain after the absolute worst wreck of his career, one nearly everyone either feared or thought he was killed instantly when the crash happened, which happened in 2012...
*5.2:* This racer has already admitted that crash in 2012 has changed him a lot, & a lot of that _not_ for the better as he has changed physically & mentally
*5.3:* In addition basically every race fan who knows his career fears/believes he suffers from CTE...
Also this comment was made in March 2020 & this guy at that point is only 41 years old.
How he is _still_ alive & trying to live life after all that I will *never* know... I really hope the rest of his life is peaceful, as pain-free as it can be, & any & all suffering he has to endure is minimal.
That story about the little girl with cancer almost made me cry
As a RN I can attest that all of these things happen all the time. My heart is made happy and broken all the time by this crazy hospital life.
The nursing home blueberry story actually made me cry. Somehow touching stories about old people really affect me
That poor guy with cancer who'd been looking forward to seeing his cat again- I REALLY hope they were allowed to bring his cat in to wherever they moved him to so he could see them again. He deserved that much. I also hope someone was able to take in the cat so the poor kitty didn't end up homeless or get put down after losing their family and home.
I do too, well, cats are not always as quiet as affection as dog is, animals can be very therapeutic. And I would wager a bet that that cat helped him keep his mind off his pain.
Sometimes the best you can do for someone dying is be there for them.
I'm so glad to hear the one, where the guy was trying to pass a huge turd and he fell off the toilet. I'm so sorry, but I laughed til I had tears. The others were so sad....it was nice to enjoy one.
That’s kinds weird but stil funny
He died?
This makes me know just how lucky I am to be alive. I am grateful.
Same, I’m grateful for living a healthy life and a healthy body, just think things can be worse.
Amen Sweetie
same here
And me here got hit by a car thinking myelf an unlucky bastard. "Facepalm." I should do more than doing nothing like before.
It is a rewarding attitude to have, being able to realize life isn’t guaranteeing you a single thing..
My mom was a social worker for 29 years and the amount of abuse on children and the elderly is incredible. She was called to the hospital for many of her clients. 😟
Regarding the issue of the body rejecting transplants, I had artificial cornea transplants to prevent this. My corneas were malformed when I was born. They thought that my body would reject a cornea that had belong to someone else, so I had some that are basically made out of plastic put in.
Fun fact - this particular type of cornea is only made in blue. I happen to be born with blue eyes to begin with. That made my eyes look really pretty. If you’re not, you look a bit scary.
Also, I wasn’t born with pupils. My pupils are plastic. This means that they can’t expand or contract. It doesn’t cause me any problems, as long as I don’t look in the direction of the sun.
Also, I’ve had my cataracts removed.
I had glaucoma before I had my cornea transplants, but it cleared up after that.
I was born without vision but with light perception. Now, I can see a little bit out of my right eye. The retina detached on my left eye. They might be able to reattach it if stem cell technology improves to that point.
I’m pretty happy with what I have now. In case you’re wondering, I was born with peters anomaly. It was pretty much a genetic fluke. I’m a pretty happy person and am glad that I can see some. I think all told with 30+ surgeries and all the care and the travel and everything else, it got up to about $500,000. I now like to say that I have $500,000 on my face that nobody sees.
Anyway, I didn’t mean to rant. The body rejecting things that aren’t its own is an issue though.
The story around 21 minutes the blueberry sauce story, hits me really hard. I have lived with my Maternal grandparents since I was 4 (22yrs) and I can't imagine just putting them in a home and leaving them be. They have helped raise me and it is only right now for me to do my best to help make life easier for them.
*listens to stories o children dying and/or suffering* oh that's so sad, those poor kids!
*Hears story of lady in nursing home being mistreated by nurse and put in corner for making a mass if her self while trying to eat when the nurse who is supposed to feed her was being a chatty bitch* alright! How'd the onion ninja get into my fortress?!
This is why I 110% support physician assisted suicide. I did my NA Clinicals in a nursing home full of people forced alive, my classmates and I all sat in silence during lunch before one person stood up and said “who else is gonna off themselves before ending up like this” and every single one of us raised our hand. Not being able to say yes or no isn’t living, it’s torture. Quality of life should be considered equally if not more important than quantity of life.
Oh and please please please people, make an end of life plan, discuss with lawyers and family what you want if you end up not being able to make your own medical decisions. It’s hard but please do it.
Im on the second story and almost bawled because we had waited so long that when the Dr told me it was Non Hogkin's Lymphoma, I was excited because I didn't know what it was but if we know what it is, we can treat it. My doctor said "I've never seen someone excited when I tell them they have cancer" and I at first figured he was joking. My parents were both medical, and my dumb, 18 year old self hadn't even noticed that they had gone silent. When the Dr left, I wanted to scream and cry, but my mom broke down crying, saying that it could be a mistake. I stayed strong for her but told her no, it wasn't a mistake and that I could beat it, That was 6 years ago, 5 years of remission.
I've always heard stories of parents backing the car into their own children by accident and they always bother me so much. My mind just can't process how that is possible. How does a child crawl under a car, why was a child young enough to crawl left unsupervised. That pain and guilt is just so much, my brain refuses to process that scenario. I can't even cope with the thought
The worst of the one here is that the kid should have lived! They were in the culvert under a driveway, something that should *absolutely* be able to take the weight of a car.
Both parents are sure the kid is with the other parent. Or you look away for a moment because you're human and something else catches your attention and the kid darts away. In short, life.
Kids are faster than you realize. It only takes a second. It's so strange how it doesn't feel like we're darting away that fast or trying really hard to be sneaky when we're little. We just go. Either not bothering to announce what or where we are going or too quiet during a moment of distraction. But the flupside is that maybe our incessant whining is getting ignored because they're trying to focus on something else that needs to be done right that minute. Most kids are impatient to a fault.
The hardest thing I saw was a 32 year old man who had recently been in a freak accident and became paralyzed from the neck down. He was conscious but intubated, mentally all there but had essentially no way to communicate except eye movement, and was not expected to regain any function. I was there when his young children came to visit for the first time and they were scared of him, all tubed up and bandages. I could see the tears in his eyes every time I had to suction his tube, which was clearly excruciating for him. I still think about him.
These stories are so sad yet I can’t stop watching. They’re making me cry...
I like to think listening to sad things and letting yourself cry over it every so often is healthy. Idk if it's true if I'm in some kind of denial, but it makes me feel better about doing it lol
You nurses, doctors and health professionals who deal with death, disease and the callous, criminal neglect and abuse by nursing home staff are made of a special sort of tender toughness.. Hearts of palladium, with character of titanium. God bless you all.
My mom got in a super bad car accident when I was 7 or 8. (I'm 16 now) she broke several ribs, her pelvis, a leg, an arm, both lungs collapsed and she had a concussion. She was airlifted to the hospital. It was so bad you could see the imprint of the other person's liscence plates on the passenger side. This was about a month before Christmas. The first time I seen her was like December 15 or something. She was sitting upright and smiling and talking and laughing and it was awesome. The doctors said she'd never be able to walk again. She came home on I think December 25 (best Christmas present ever tbh) and she was walking with the help of a walker. After a few months she could walk on her own. It was awesome. Everyone was so happy. Shes so lucky to be alive.
The story of the little girl who lost both her parents then died of cancer tells me that the universe is indifferent to our suffering and there's nobody out there who gives a shit about us.
This is why we need to care about one another. ❤
43:13 my dad almost died from a nosebleed. An artery in his sinuses had burst and blood was pouring out his nose and down his throat. My mom took him to the ER but the drs and nurses didn't take the situation seriously until my dad started throwing up blood. They had to stuff 9ft of gauze up his nose with no anesthesia to stop the bleeding, and he was in the hospital for close to a week. He was really close to bleeding to death from a bloody nose.
I am only a fourth of the way through while listening at work and I couldn't help but pause on my project and type this out:
Thank you to all medical professionals for what you do. I know sometimes it isn't easy, there's bad patients, something goes horribly wrong, or events are just wrested from your control at the drop of a hat. But you try, you're there and you try your damndest to make sure these people live to see another day, or go home to their loved ones.
Some of these stories made me realize the pressure of doing this job: sometimes being the one and only person in the world who cares about the people under your charge. That type of respnsibility is not something one person should have to shoulder alone, but you guys just take it in stride as part of your duty.
I cannot thank you all enough for what you do. I cannot thank you for all those who have been helped or even saved by your efforts, they're just too numerous to count. But thank you all regardless. Yours is a hard task, and I know I would be unable to do it. I am just glad that there's someone out there who can.
I work for a nonprofit where we have Disney characters visit children’s hospitals and collaborate with other organizations such as Make-a-Wish. We do an annual show at a children’s hospital and last year was my first time performing. The area of the hospital we usually performed at wasn’t available so we did it in a small playroom on the fifth floor, which wasn’t ideal but that meant that kids who normally wouldn’t have been able to see it were able to this year. As much as I love doing these things, seeing so many children hooked up to machines and looking so visibly ill just broke my heart. I’m just glad we’re able to add some joy into their lives.
Nursing homes can be awful... if I still around, my parents will never see the inside of one of those hell holes... not only do I love my folks and want the best care for them but I also really don’t need a murder charge, then I definitely wouldn’t be able to care for them...
Look into in home care it sometimes can be cheaper and is covered by most insurances
We always said this too. Until my husbands grandmother had 3 strokes and we were physically unable to care for her as she needed 24/7 care and medical attention that we were unable to provide. Putting her in a nursing home was the worst decision we have ever made but we had no other option. Thankfully she was lucky and was cared for very well and all her caregivers were good as gold to her and many of them came to her funeral when she passed 2 years later (of another stroke in her sleep). We did a lot of soul searching and research before we chose what home to place her in and I don’t regret the decision. I never thought we would ever put any of our loved ones in a home, and hopefully we will never have to again, but sometimes that decision has to be made when you can’t give your loved one the care they need at home.
34:00 That mother did not want her family to see her die, and this is very, very common with terminally ill patients. One of my best friends has been an oncology nurse for 35 years, and she says she sees patients hold on until the family has all gone and then pass. The family is grief-stricken, but in reality their loved one waited until everyone left.
There are people who are nurses that make you question why they even wanted to become a nurse in the first place. Like they truly are not intuitive with their care and/or are not exactly doing it for the passion. I've seen this kind of stuff when I was a direct care staff for a group home. Some of the staff were literally hired off the street..probably only because it was the only job they could get. Like clearly, they weren't care giver material. It was SHOCKING.
9:02 They should have been fired and fined for gross negligence
14:00 - now bear in mind that the lack of appropriate disabled toileting facilities mean that a significant number of disabled people have to do exactly the same thing - dehydrate themselves, hold it, deal with accidents, or not leave the house. Dehydration and holding can cause UTIs, stones, problems with either chronic retention or an overactive bladder etc which can all lead to more serious problems including kidney damage, obstruction, incontinence, sepsis and even death. All for the lack of decent toilets for people using wheelchairs and especially those who can't transfer or who for whatever other reason can't use most disabled toilets. It doesn't help when half the time they're used as store rooms, they're actually inaccessible, there's not enough space to even turn your wheelchair around (if you can even get into it) let alone if you need help to transfer, a hoist, or changing facilities for older children, teens or adults. Would YOU want to lie on the floor of a toilet? Of course not. Aside from the health risk, it's just dirty and humiliating. It drives me crazy.
And that's without going into schools which refuse to let kids go to the bathroom during classes. I'm sorry, but I would rather my child end up getting in trouble if they really needed to use the bathroom than had to suffer, be in pain, or have an accident in class. The idea of bathroom passes or that a 2.5 year-old isn't allowed to have an accident at kindergarten/preschool without getting kicked out, or that kids who aren't toilet trained aren't allowed in school is ridiculous. I've seen kids with medical reasons for their incontinence being refused school placements, being told how disgusting they are, and lazy, etc and them and their parents being told they just have to "work harder" to "potty train" a child who lacks the ability to fully feel what is going on in their body - and therefore is incapable of becoming continent. It's a disability and the fact that kids are being discriminated against, and are being taught that, like this poor woman, they're not allowed to use the bathroom when they want to, being punished for a disability they can't help... that's messed up.
I second that statement, in 2017 I got hit by a car and was in a wheelchair for a few months, after aboit a week of holding whenever i was out, i ended up wearing adult diapers when I went out due to the lack of suitable facilities, and as a consequence, that same lack of facilities resulted in me being forced to sit in a wet diaper for most of the day until I got home, still better than being constantly dehydrated though (but not much better)
Using a regular public toilet is nearly impossible, and disabled/accessible toilets are few and far between in my city
I can't imagine how people who are permanently disabled deal with that problem without going insane
@@mwbgaming28 And the thing is, if you're someone who has to use incontinence products/protective underwear (a preferred phrase generally than adult diapers, as many people feel infantalised by that phrase, even though it's the most common one used by the public) but are also disabled and unable to stand for long enough, there's no way to change those if you're out of the house because they sure as hell don't make fully accessible disabled toilets. So frustrating.
@@JustAnotherBuckyLover thankfully for me it was only temporary (full feeling in that area, and full control of continence, but complete inability to stand or balance due to injury) but I can tell you it sucked, especially since it was during summer and I was constantly drinking water to avoid heatstroke (fuck that life) as for the infantisation, I didn't really care much about that, my logic at the time was call it what you want, I had a medical reason for using it
I now get a bit angry whenever I see a business without a ramp or disabled toilet, or that requires you to first buy something to use it, even though I am no longer dependant on such facilities it still pisses me off
The only moment I remember from my first grade year was watching my great grandpa die. It was sad but strange because I knew he wanted to die. The pain of him breathing was too much and his lungs were too dry. I remember how sad the doctor was being that a whole family- including me, in first grade at the time- has to watch a close family member die. It was strange. I was used to my family being gone though as I live in a huge military family. But this was different. I would never see him again. But it didn’t hurt me. I watched him painfully die but I was comforted that he got what he wanted and his pain was gone. I don’t know how to describe the feeling. I felt nothing. Not happiness, not sadness, not anger, not love. Just nothing. I was there and that was it. It was the strangest feeling I’ve ever gone through. I remember the doctor was really sad about that as he knew that the hospital could’ve done more but they didn’t because of the money, and I respect that decision. He got what he wanted and that’s okay. But the doctor kept on trying to pay us because of how he thought we felt, but we kept denying it because he was so nice. I never got to go to his funeral, but I get to see his ashes every year. My great grandma is still alive (but has cancer which is a concern) and she has the ashes. I get to see her every year. Great grandma also wasn’t sad when great grandpa died because she is a heavy Christian. I was Christian at the time, but now I’m not. But I’m still not bothered. But the doctor was really sad. I feel bad for him because of what he thought we went through when we didn’t go through many feelings. My family and I had no feelings. We felt empty. Nothing. But that’s my story of having a doctor get really sad.
My dad, after my mom passed this last June said something to me that has stuck. He was an EMT before I was born and had to switch to a different career to support the family. Anyways, the thing he said he learned and realized, was that there are worse things than death itself. The suffering you have to watch people go through. In my mind, I've come to the realization that I see death as pure unconditional freedom. Freedom from all the pain that is happening in a human. All the restrictions and chains that tie us to a physical body that is damaged or giving out on us. Just to let go and be free from the restraints that our body keeps us in and finally to be at peace. Yeah, I'd say there are fates worse than death itself.
The stories of elderies being left to essentially fend for themselves break me. My mum is Thai and I grew up very close to her. The idea of her being left in the street or to die in a hospital alone is horrific. When my mum’s stepdad died, the whole family in Thailand got together so they could say goodbye to his body. Not very sure how common it is but they had him laid out on a floor bed like he was peacefully sleeping, then everyone was given a turn to hold his hand and say goodbye. Family is very important to us.
This isn't really related to the question, but I figured it might make someone laugh after all those terrible stories (terrible as in "oh my god I can't believe people actually went through that," not like badly written or something).
Anyway, a family friend works in a nursing home, and has talked a little bit about some of the residents. One day he told us about a lady that believes she has a midget living in her closet. Apparently it only comes out at night. Apparently she charges it rent.
So yeah, this little old lady believes there is a midget living in her closet who pays rent to her.
Thank you. That helped me so much.
@@SashaMkai You're welcome. I'm glad my second-hand story of a little old lady charging the (as far as we know) imaginary midget in her closet rent was able to help you.
3:08 wow thats just... i feel so bad for her. Im crying so hard. That poor little girl 😢😭
She literally lost both her parents in the 2.5 months before she died.
That one of the nursing home resident with the blueberry pie just absolutely broke my heart. I pray that Karma will avenge her a thousandfold
The first reddit post really cut deep into my heart.
The one escaping sex slavery, it was stated she got there because of drug addiction and the family acted like they didn’t care. I can almost understand. My family has gone through hell with someone that used to be close to us. This person threatened her dying father, assaulted her mother shortly after her father’s death and assaulted her nephew. It was constantly tolerated because her mom kept hoping, and hoping that she would get well. She wouldn’t leave, and being that it was California, couldn’t be forced to leave, even though she assaulted her nephew and, at this point threatened her father.
Because her mother was old enough, we were able to get a restraining order to ‘protect a senior citizen’. The restraining order forced her out of the house. We’d have gangsters and mobsters (literally) coming by and threatening the house because she owed them money. It got to the point where we realized it was no longer worth approaching the people she hung out with and asking them to not associate with her because she’d find new people. After several threats from her associates wanting money she owed them, all ties were cut. All ties.
Her mother
Her children
Her brother
Everyone she knew will not see her anymore. We wouldn’t even know if she were abducted.
It would break her mother’s heart to hear something like that happened to her but she’s all out of tears.
All that to say, what happened to that poor woman in this video is terrible, but she brought herself there and her family may have been abused and ripped off so much they were out of tears and beyond emotion.
Hippa says you cant talk about patients cases by name. Im CPT and as long as the patients name or identity is not revealed,your ok to speak about it fyi
MRSA: Multi-resistant staphylococcus aureus - golden staph that resists treatment by many/most antibiotics.
Oh, you mean methicillin-resistant staph aureus. Serious stuff...
relatable cause I had that like a year or so ago
As far as I know, it can only be treated by an emergency bacteriophage cocktail
I had no idea what this was when I first heard it thank you
my mother had that. she was on iv strength antibiotics as a last resort before they actually would have to hook her up to iv, and with how weak her immune system was getting we were worried she might actually diw
Dementia is so terrible that it isn’t even used in Hell as a torture
"her whole life was in a shopping bag"... How can someone do that to their mum 😢 (assuming she wasn't a terrible mother or something)
I am a firm believer that some people wait to die when their family is gone to spare then the heartbreak. The day my grandfather died ( he was in hospice) I had been counting his breath every few hours (I work in the medical field) and noticed a clear decrease in breaths/m, we knew he was not long for this world. For some reason I end up getting into a fight with my uncle and we leave. It took us about 10 minutes to get home and 5 more to get in bed. My head hadn't touched the pillow before my uncle was calling to tell me he had passed. No one can tell me that he didn't wait for my dad (his son), my mom, my husband, and I to leave... no one.
32:16 Man shoulda never tried to steal Christmas. His heart grew three sizes that day.
The co worker naming her baby after the pope baby that passed away made me cry. It does kinda seem like a second chance
The story at 26:13 reminds me of my grandma she only ate when my grandpa fed her she died not long ago from altimeters I miss her
I'm so sorry, how are you holding up?
My grandmother died in 2019 at the age of 92. We went to see her about a week before she died in the nursing home (In Finland) me, my mother and my older sister went inside and heard a weak voice call out "mother, mother!" she just sat there in a wheelchair and called for her mother who had died in early 80's. She looked so small and frail (she used to be a little obese) and when she grabbed my mothers arm and said her name and "I wan't to go home" I started to cry. It was so sad and depressing, I have never seen her like that. She had dementia but it worsened after she fell and hit her head in the nursing home. She barely ate. My mother had to tell her me and my sister's names and she just looked at us with this puzzled look. Dementia is hell, I wouldn't wish for it to anyone.
I was a nurse for 32 years. I have two cases that will forever be in my mind. One was a 33 year old alcoholic admitted to our floor,my patient. His skin and eyes were bright yellow from alcoholic hepatitis and his liver was failing. He was going into DT's. Administered IV Valium. He was cognizant of everything going on and decided he was going to leave so he could get some alcohol to feel better. He started fighting us and we had to restrain him, more Valium, still fighting! Cursing us with every breath. I was taken off the floor just to care for him. After being there about 3 hours the hemorrhaging started, he was vomiting and pooping blood faster than we could administer the transfusions going into both feet and both arms. Couldn't stabilize him and he died about 2 hours before shift ended. He had never married and had lived with his mother all his life. She had him late in life and he was all she had. I sat and held her while she cried and blamed herself for enabling his alcoholism. It was so sad. He died a horrific death. The other was an 80 year old who was being cared for by her daughter at home. When she came to our floor from the ER, none of us could believe the condition she was in. Skin and bone with security's ulcers on both hips and coccyx that were to the bone. It took me and another nurse the entire shift to clean her ulcers. That's when we realized you could actually see the bone. At some point she had broken a hip and her leg was frozen horizontally across her body. We had to leave the rails down and place pillows on the bedside table to support her leg. This poor lady had not even been treated for the broken hip! The worst case of neglect I had ever seen. Her daughter had kept her at home for her SS check. I don't think she had been bathed in years. The smell was horrendous. The dr. derided the black, neurotic tissue around the bedside and from hip bone to hip bone was just an open wound that you could see the bones. We had to clean an dress the wound every 8 hours and it took two of us almost the whole shift just to care for her. We had to fully dress,gowns, gloves, masks every time we went in her room. She lived about 5 days. We were told the daughter was charged with cri.final neglect, as she should have been!!!
I've always loved these videos but this one today might have done me in. I broke my back in 2017 in a car accident and had to learn how to walk again. It was a very taxing situation and essentially the worst part of my life. The man who broke his back around 8:50.. I just can't imagine having a glimmer of hope taken away from me by someone transporting me. I literally just cannot put into words how bad that hurts me on the inside. I told my friends that if anything ever happened to me and i broke my back again that they are to kill me. there is a legitimate plan for them to do so. I have no words, I have no words to describe the overwhelming pain that I have for this man. There's no way I could ever participate in life again if that would have happened to me. I would have begged constantly. daily, to be put out of my misery. I just- I've never read one of these that has affected me so much.
Every mention of neglect just reconfirms I can’t be a nurse because my standards are too high for other people and it makes me too angry… I would probably end up physically assaulting someone for failing to do their job properly within a week. And NG tubes are the worst! I feel so terrible for anyone who pulls one out in confusion because they’re absolute torment to get in but when they’re ready to come out the relief is immense. Taking one out before it’s time is just going to make your condition far worse and have to deal with immense physical pain getting a new one in.
A new kid at my school who was almost 7 feet tall was an aspiring athlete who had a lot of promise in basketball. He got hit by a car and broke some bones in his back and his neck and he will never play basketball again. Honestly, I thought he was an alright kid, never done any wrong to me. To know that you’ll never be able to do what you enjoy again is a fate worse than death.
This actually just happened to me last week. I'm a vet tech with a housecall clinic. My boss (the vet) and I had been helping one of our clients with her dog's chronic musculoskeletal issues. He was a five-year-old English Mastiff mix. He would have incidents of falling and being unable to get back up for some time (he weighed close to 130 pounds and his owner is an older woman who can't lift that much weight by herself). He had chronic hip weakness and hypothyroidism (look it up). Then he suddenly refused to eat. He was even refusing his favorite treats, so he wasn't getting his thyroid medication- there was no way this woman could safely get a pill down this dog's throat by hand. She called us last week because of this and was concerned about bloating. He was undeweight, though he didn't look it because his abdomen was so distended. He was having some trouble breathing. We did an abdomenocentesis (used a needle to draw fluid/gas from the abdominal cavity) and drew out really nasty-looking fluid. We got the owner's consent and ran this guy to the vet teaching hospital a couple towns north, about 30 miles. They found a tumor in the right side of his heart, which was causing heart failure. There was nothing that could be done for him. It had looked so hopeful, though. He was bright, alert, responsive, fully ambulatory, and still as sweet as could be. Aside from the increased respiratory effort, his vitals were normal. But it's those hidden little things that have the biggest impact.
Still a vet tech...
He wasn't technically my patient, but... Well, he was my baby boy. I'm talking about my cat, BTW. Frisco. I had adopted him when he was about a year old and had him ten years to the day. About three months before he died, he had developed a mass under his tongue that had ulcerated, gotten infected (because cat mouths are literally the cesspools of nature), and started to smell awful. I got him on antibiotics and that cleared up the infection. Then, two months later, the smell came back, he was drooling, and he couldn't eat very well. We took him to the teaching hospital when I noticed the mass under his tongue. At the teaching hospital, he got a feeding tube (esophageal-gastric or EG) and they biopsied the mass. It was squamous cell carcinoma, and the tumor was inoperable because of its location (to get a proper margin, they would have had to remove his tongue and entire lower jaw- that was unacceptable and everyone knew it). He had to be on a liquid diet and get pain meds through the feeding tube. Two weeks later, his best buddy, my 16-year-old female Siamese, died suddenly from kidney failure. I think Frisco was more concerned for her than himself, because he started to decline pretty quick after that. I got home from work one afternoon and found him with blood pouring from his mouth. The tumor had burst and his tongue was pretty much severed. I couldn't do anything by myself, so I called my mom (a former veterinarian) to get her to come home early so we could put Frisco down. We took him outside (I had promised him he would die in the sunshine) and gave him a double-dose of his pain meds. He relaxed and started purring, like he knew the pain would be over soon. Then we gave him an IV injection of acepromazine (heavy-duty sedative, overdoses can be lethal). He died in my arms. It's been almost four years now, and I still haven't really gotten over it.
I'm not a doc. But this is a story about my brothers' dad (we have different dads) and one of my brother's drinking buddies. It's just so fricked and I can't imagine how docs and nurses deal with this. Anyway.
It's a quiet night, and my mum and I are laughing about something and her phone rang. It was my oldest brother and his wife. He said "Mum. Dad got into a crash." And the entire room fell silent. I remember the way my mum's face fell. My mum asked "What happened?" My brother replied "Dad was driving to fill up his motorbike. And he was with *insert name of younger brother's drinking buddy*. They got hit by an 10 wheeler. *Drinking buddy* died on site. But dad is being transported by ambulance. *Younger brother* is in the ambulance with him. They're being transported to the major county hospital" My mum couldn't say anything but "Call me back when you get to the hospital. And tell him that I have nothing against him. Tell him I still respect him." And my brother said "Okay. Bye." And hung up. I hugged my mum and my mum seemed so shocked. About an hour later we get another call "Mum. Dad won't make it. The doctors have coded him about 4 times. The doctors are saying he won't be able to make it. Is there anything else you want to say to him?" My mum sighed and she said "Exactly what I said before. I have nothing against him." The phone was passed to my older brother "Mum. Dad has so many times in him. I told him I was there for him when we were in the ambulance. All he could say was "uuuhh" *equivalent of yeah in Khmer* he's gone mum." My mum spoke some more, I don't remember exactly what she said. But my brothers' dad was on a ventilator, pieces of bone poking through his pelvis, he was covered in tubes. (From what I was told). My older brother had to come and stay with us for months because he was so fricked up about it. It was so heart breaking to witness through the phone. I couldn't imagine how it would be for my brothers or my brothers' dad. The fact that doctors have to deal with crap like this just makes them the most amazing people ever.
I've read sad stories and watched videos like this but damn... this video made me shed some tears man
I listened to the stories about dementia and remembered something from several years ago: I used to volunteer at a nursing home that had chapel services every Wednesday for anyone who wanted to go (they were for anyone who could loosely be considered a Christian, whether Catholic, Protestant, or anything else they could possibly be), and I would usually help take people who were interested to the services. Every time, the chaplain, Ellen, would ask if anyone had any prayer requests, and every time, one of the residents (I still remember her name-- Charlotte) would answer her by saying "my mother". Her mother died a long time ago. Chaplain Ellen knew, but she would always pray for Charlotte's mother anyway. Dementia/Alzheimer's (I think they're the same thing?) is horrible.
The things, the monsters who raped and beat those elderly people deserved 🔫 🔪 not prison at taxpayers' expense.
This video made my depression worse and better all at once
My mum used to be a HCA with dementia patients. She told me of a time where she broke the rules and told a lie to an elderly lady with dementia. The lady was agitated and walking around at night, wondering when her aunt was going to pick her up. Mum consoled her by saying they had a call, and aunt was running late, would be there in the morning, and asked that she sleep the night.
And the neglected NICU babies is so sad. My sister has twins in NICU, and visits them everyday when her partner gets home from work, and a woman pulled them to one side to talk about possible neglect. Babies' dad blew up, saying he doesn't want to keep distracting nurses from looking after other babies, they come every day, and that they weren't told that they could feed them, or change their nappies. The woman was shocked, and let them go.
21:59-23:16 makes me so fucking mad. My mom is in a nursing home right now and if I found out the nurses treated her like the nurse treated this woman, I'd be in prison
Why wasn't that nursing home prosecuted for what they did to that old woman?
I had a friend die from esophageal varices but he wasn’t alcoholic. He was extremely obese though. The story from his wife was very similar to that one. Very bloody and chaotic as they tried to get him out of his house and then into theatre. Him struggling and fighting them in his moments of conscious-ness when they were trying to resuscitate him. Very sad and frightening end to man that was quite gentle and amazingly giftedly intelligent.
The lady who had the terrible bone cancer yet kept fighting is truly inspiring. RIP
13:35 pretty sure that's one of the reasons why adult diapers were invented
The blueberry pie story is the saddest to me
I am also pretty sure people wait to die until all or almost all the family is gone. One of my coworkers told me about how she was staying by her dad's side with her step mom and left to feed her dogs and let them out and get something really quick and come back. She didn't live that far away from their house, maybe 15 minutes, but as soon as she got to her house her step mom called her and told her he had died. My mom also died almost two years ago now. My fiance and I along with my older sisters and some of their kids went to the hospital every day to see her. Her sisters and brother also came. My dad stayed in the hospital with her. She died after almost everyone had gone home, the only people there were my dad and her youngest brother. I regret not being there until the end with her.
People who pass on after family have gone home have finished their assignments here on earth. They have held it together for a last visit. Once the family has left they can let go and step into eternity in peace.
I work in the medical field these stories still up set me. I'm ready to be done with this field of work.
I've survived multiple things I shouldn't have. Doctors missed my fractured skull after I fell out of a cart at 2yo. I have brain damage, and had 2w of seizures. Car wreck 2 door Saturn vs 18 wheeler. Car was shredded the broken seat stayed in place by some miracle, and the semi jack kniffed and we went under and hit the rear axle and all somehow survived. Survived a suicide attempt. Barely missed getting hit by a speeding car. Now I'm 21, disabled, seeing specialists as my doctor's think I have hEDS POTS Fibromyalgia and Gastroparisis. I also have CPTSD and BPD. I have lost every dream I ever had. Wanted to be an EOD Tech in the Marine Corps, but my mental illnesses fucked that for me, wanted to be a professional ballerina, but my great-grandmother got dementia and my dad wouldn't let my grandparents take over payments for it and now I can't dance cause I pass out and my joints do stay in place, wanted to do DCI, but my stepdad being unable to keep his hands to himself, and my mother choosing him over me and shipping me cross country kinda killed that, then I wanted to have a big family, thankfully I have my son, but since my health went to shit and my body couldn't handle another pregnancy, now my best friends daughter tested positive for Corona, which means my son and my family has been exposed, and they have asthma, and my health is absolute shit... So that's my life rn.
I am so sorry to hear what you're going through. I hope you are holding up well, and if you ever need to talk, I am here. Try to remind yourself that things will eventually get better and try to stay as strong as you can. Many well wishes are being sent your way, for you and your family.
honestly i would rather die than live through some sort of painful horrible disease for years and suffer a slow, painful death, like i’d rather die at 60 then die at 80 after suffering for years
8:55
Sometime October 2019 my grandma (66) was in a rehab center after a surgery, not completely sure what exactly they did, but I know they had put metal plates into her neck so they had to cut it open.
She has trouble walking already as she has polio, so this obviously didn't help. When the nurses were helping bathe her, she needed her walker to walk around, and sit on as she dried off. She asked the nurse if the walker was locked into position, so it didn't move around, and she said yes. So she goes to sit down, and it wasn't locked, she slipped and basically came out in a worst condition than before surgery.
My mom thought about suing, but we didn't. Safe to say we'll never go back there for anything. And to you nurses, you knew exactly what you did, and you were too lazy to lock it. Nice job.
Alcoholic here, 10 years sober. I had the same thing happen to me. My esophagus had a huge tear that was pouring blood into my stomach. I threw up buckets of blood. It is terrifying. I almost bled to death because the first doctor misdiagnosed me with a bleeding ulcer. 2 days later my breathing became really difficult. I could barely draw breath. Went back to the Er and they found a giant tear in my esophagus. They cauterized it. I was told if I had waiting a couple more hours to come in I’d be dead from internal bleeding.
A friend once said to me, is that ppls be fine just living there life doing everything day things, then they go to the doctor and like a week later u see them laying in the hospital with tubes everywhere, :-(his point is u be a ok until u go to the hospital)-: that's crazy but I have seen that happen b4
I had. A similar accident when an lna dropped me from a stretcher. Broke 2 Vertabrae, I thought I could sue but evidently 2 broken vertebrae is not worth a lawyers time!
I used to caregive and let me tell you that neglect and anger and understaffing is just par for the course. Yes, many people care and do good work but many don't. It's just a mess and there's a constant need for more caregivers and nurses.
It’s a dental story but oh well.
A few years back I had the get a chipped tooth removed after it had been loose for a year. The dentist put me on laughing gas while he removed the piece of tooth.
Anyways that’s how I found out I’m immune to laughing gas.
Everything every poster has said about dementia is true. I hope to God you never have to go through this with someone, but I also thank God this person left a incredibly detailed medical directive that left me with no guilt that I made a decision to let my parent die. I lived with this for nine years and I lost her long before she actually passed away. Thank God for the Hospice people and the peace we gave us all.
Thank you for listening to your parent and not being selfish like so many of these assholes were.
My grandma has dementia and cancer...
I hope they throw not the book, but the whole library at the father of the 3 year-old. That shit just pissed me off.
My now ex husband had that alcohol abuse stomach hemorrhage it was horrible but he made it. Sort of wish he hadn’t as he drained my bank account of $187k and ran off with an 18 year old. He was 42. I was in a rehab from an huge abdominal surgery. What an ass****.
Random people random problems but crying and tears, it’s so so sad that people have to go through this. I feel so bad for these family’s
How could that nurse leave that poor lady in the corner, embarrassed and hungry?! Made me cry. People are so cruel. I hope she steps on a Lego 2x a day!
my face is soaked, i haven't cried this hard for a while now, i think