The three roles a child with Reactive Attachment Disorder will play, and manipulate others into. Covert Triangulation tactics, Victim being there most powerful weapon.
First and foremost Thank you for all you Do! I am very new to this diagnosis, however not at all new to the behaviors. Your videos have helped me tremendously. They are a perfect tool for helping me realize that I'm NOT crazy, I'm not a horrible mother, and I'm not alone. They also are great tools for sharing with family and friends so that finally they can make sense of the behaviors, and realize I'm not an evil mom. So to conclude, you are awesome, you give me hope, and I pray that one day all of our children and ourselves can be healed.
Awww, Im so happy to hear the videos help...You are not alone, not crazy, and not a horrible mother...If your child is showing these behaviors towards you, it proves you are being a great mom ((HUG))
Thank you for your wonderful videos. You are so good at explaining things! I wish I had known this before. I have been rescuer to my adopted child for 3 years and my partner was always the persecutor. It has caused so much chaos and nearly broke us up so many times. I am finally learning not to fall for this trap - I intend to watch all your videos and I will pass them on. Keep up the good work xx
Im so glad you find these videos helpful...Thats my goal...helping other Rad moms. :) I understand completely the feeling of wanting to be the rescuer..it ends up attaching us in an unhealthy way unfortunately..this is Trauma bonding, and ends up making us feel worse...Im always here if you need to vent...:)
Thanks for this video. I shared it with my parents. Hopefully they will watch and gain some insight. My daughter has successfully triangulated us and our relationship is almost over.
Oh no...Im so sorry to hear this. It is so hard for people to understand that the child they see is not real. Its a fake role they play. Ill be praying for you. If only they could see that same child when the child is the perpetrator attacking you.....they look very different then.
Oh my gosh you just described my mother and brother to a t. He had gotten my grandparents as his rescuer and at this point they are saying all of his behavior is my moms fault and tha he just needs love no consequences ever and that he good for them. Everyone else is the problem in their eyes and it's so frustrating that they just dont see how it really is
My child will tell me that I get the "REAL" her, and everyone else (teachers, other family members, church family etc.) get the "fake" her. Manipulation at its best...my child plays the victim everywhere we go, and blames everyone else for her actions..always..
Thanks for your channel! Such a help! I have an adopted son who is 3. We struggle with a learned helplessness and perceived laziness. How do we handle this. My son gets unhappy everything I try and teach him. He has shown some small signs of victim and RAD but not extreme... We see it in social settings. With the potty training.. he is potty trained but then he regresses at night. It feels like he is doing it on purpose... Too lazy to get up because he can do it as he has before but then it's like he chooses to wet his bed.
You say try more, but lol. I ohh no, excuse me but there are so many abused kids, and who crave N would give all to have someone who give EM love, and some of us were parents to our parents, my mom stayed that way to this day, do I ve right to have life? or I LL be free 24/7 shrink for spoiled kids, if that is so I LL go volonter at hospital for abendoned babies N toddlers. Cuz my daughter is 13 almost it 's shaped N formed character N it s s my fault that her father never gave a damn BOUT her N negolect her, and she blames me, who did all to make it up to her, and she went to live with him, she 'abuse me, screams tantrums on the floor, and breaks things, but I ran to by knew DVD, and she said once "when I get angry I hurt ppl or do something bad" she left to live with him, he left her alone non stop he is with his new gf future wife, and they left her with hurt neck alone N went in holiday.. She would kill me if I do it, but but for dad, I IT s Okey, So I m the one to take everyone's in family issues, and who in the world helped me. I did it on my own. I M tired drained of EM. N yet it 's never enough, I M always punching bag, and no! I I ve right to live normally N peacefully N to have no narcs life N to feel loved N protected once in my life. She LL always have grange on me, I was 8 N did not slept for months cuz my mom was drugged with pills once almost burned the house, and luckily I was awake. I took too much off others ppl crosses, and N LL be very open with you, and you say when they get older it will be better, no not sure, but at least no in my case My life was mom 's hysterical shows, RAD BF never found peace gave him all love N devotion, and inner demons never left him, now in jail became drug dealer..... Help N listen to him.hey wait a min WHAT BOUT ME, NOW I M GONNA PUT UP WITH MY DAUGHTERS NARCS WISHES... U KIDDING. I ONLY HAD GRANDMA 400KM AWAY AS SUPPORT ON PHONE. I I DID T BECAME CRIMINAL, NOTHING like that, I ve TRIED N TRIED. HARD core TRUTH THEY can not be helped. If 12 years N 3 years of her molestation me, and forgiveness love understanding, and refused jobs, and stayed cuz of her Manipulating the N, lies, and lost home, and my ex took it with his connection N SPC and she was playing me. My ex he 's neglected her again he 's on holiday left her alone, and Injured, he 's with new gf, and who is young N not very into all this she 's bizz woman, and lawyer, well, maybe she LL do it better..., maybe my daughter wants just exactly what that ,dad new mom, whom dad loves, and he LL never leave N she too. New brothers N sisters. New mom new family, and whom I ve crashed, and OK I failed, and I can live with it, happy ending for everyone.. TO BE TOTALLY HONEST SHE WAS PHISICALLY AGRESSIVE SINCE 9 Y OLD N IT WAS GETTING WORSE N WORSE. I IT S EVEN SHAMEFUL TO WRITE ABOUT IT.
I have a rad child. I have custody of my daughter her mother abandoned her with me. What do you do when your child has a melt down and pulls the,”I’m crazy act” to throw you a curve ball. Last melt down she as the show tore out a small bit of her hair. Then of course I caused it. What do you do with that. It was a first
We don't need the music because We get the RAD victim child. We are here for resources and help not guitar solo that doesn't match the emotions of what RAD caretakers experience. Thank You for Your humanity towards so many Families.
I didn't leave a link...Im fairly new to youtube, and not always thinking or know how to do something like that...You can google it very easily...Its called the Drama Triangle.
Thank you so much for these videos!!! I'm so glad to know there are others out there that have had the same experiences with their kids.
First and foremost Thank you for all you Do! I am very new to this diagnosis, however not at all new to the behaviors. Your videos have helped me tremendously. They are a perfect tool for helping me realize that I'm NOT crazy, I'm not a horrible mother, and I'm not alone. They also are great tools for sharing with family and friends so that finally they can make sense of the behaviors, and realize I'm not an evil mom. So to conclude, you are awesome, you give me hope, and I pray that one day all of our children and ourselves can be healed.
Awww, Im so happy to hear the videos help...You are not alone, not crazy, and not a horrible mother...If your child is showing these behaviors towards you, it proves you are being a great mom ((HUG))
Watching this through tears. Sundays after so hard for this very reason. So many people to "rescue" my child.... 😢
Yes this video is helping! I’m in disbelief that you described it so well!!!
Thank you for your wonderful videos. You are so good at explaining things! I wish I had known this before. I have been rescuer to my adopted child for 3 years and my partner was always the persecutor. It has caused so much chaos and nearly broke us up so many times. I am finally learning not to fall for this trap - I intend to watch all your videos and I will pass them on. Keep up the good work xx
Im so glad you find these videos helpful...Thats my goal...helping other Rad moms. :) I understand completely the feeling of wanting to be the rescuer..it ends up attaching us in an unhealthy way unfortunately..this is Trauma bonding, and ends up making us feel worse...Im always here if you need to vent...:)
Thanks for this video. I shared it with my parents. Hopefully they will watch and gain some insight. My daughter has successfully triangulated us and our relationship is almost over.
Oh no...Im so sorry to hear this. It is so hard for people to understand that the child they see is not real. Its a fake role they play. Ill be praying for you. If only they could see that same child when the child is the perpetrator attacking you.....they look very different then.
Ur a blessing ❤
Oh my gosh you just described my mother and brother to a t. He had gotten my grandparents as his rescuer and at this point they are saying all of his behavior is my moms fault and tha he just needs love no consequences ever and that he good for them. Everyone else is the problem in their eyes and it's so frustrating that they just dont see how it really is
My child will tell me that I get the "REAL" her, and everyone else (teachers, other family members, church family etc.) get the "fake" her. Manipulation at its best...my child plays the victim everywhere we go, and blames everyone else for her actions..always..
Bren Michaud she’s making you feel that’s she’s real with u. She’s manipulating you coz you see though some parts of her
Ok boomer you created her, and molded her into what she is. You are to blame.
Thanks for your channel! Such a help! I have an adopted son who is 3. We struggle with a learned helplessness and perceived laziness. How do we handle this. My son gets unhappy everything I try and teach him. He has shown some small signs of victim and RAD but not extreme... We see it in social settings. With the potty training.. he is potty trained but then he regresses at night. It feels like he is doing it on purpose... Too lazy to get up because he can do it as he has before but then it's like he chooses to wet his bed.
Your videos are so comforting. Thank you.
Thankyou
Everytime I watch these I have a palm to forehead moment as I remember, again, these things. Thank you!
Excellent video, just wanted to know a bit about mental health.
You say try more, but lol. I ohh no, excuse me but there are so many abused kids, and who crave N would give all to have someone who give EM love, and some of us were parents to our parents, my mom stayed that way to this day, do I ve right to have life? or I LL be free 24/7 shrink for spoiled kids, if that is so I LL go volonter at hospital for abendoned babies N toddlers. Cuz my daughter is 13 almost it 's shaped N formed character N it s s my fault that her father never gave a damn BOUT her N negolect her, and she blames me, who did all to make it up to her, and she went to live with him, she 'abuse me, screams tantrums on the floor, and breaks things, but I ran to by knew DVD, and she said once "when I get angry I hurt ppl or do something bad" she left to live with him, he left her alone non stop he is with his new gf future wife, and they left her with hurt neck alone N went in holiday.. She would kill me if I do it, but but for dad, I IT s Okey, So I m the one to take everyone's in family issues, and who in the world helped me. I did it on my own. I M tired drained of EM. N yet it 's never enough, I M always punching bag, and no! I I ve right to live normally N peacefully N to have no narcs life N to feel loved N protected once in my life. She LL always have grange on me, I was 8 N did not slept for months cuz my mom was drugged with pills once almost burned the house, and luckily I was awake. I took too much off others ppl crosses, and N LL be very open with you, and you say when they get older it will be better, no not sure, but at least no in my case My life was mom 's hysterical shows, RAD BF never found peace gave him all love N devotion, and inner demons never left him, now in jail became drug dealer..... Help N listen to him.hey wait a min WHAT BOUT ME, NOW I M GONNA PUT UP WITH MY DAUGHTERS NARCS WISHES... U KIDDING. I ONLY HAD GRANDMA 400KM AWAY AS SUPPORT ON PHONE. I I DID T BECAME CRIMINAL, NOTHING like that, I ve TRIED N TRIED. HARD core TRUTH THEY can not be helped. If 12 years N 3 years of her molestation me, and forgiveness love understanding, and refused jobs, and stayed cuz of her Manipulating the N, lies, and lost home, and my ex took it with his connection N SPC and she was playing me. My ex he 's neglected her again he 's on holiday left her alone, and Injured, he 's with new gf, and who is young N not very into all this she 's bizz woman, and lawyer, well, maybe she LL do it better..., maybe my daughter wants just exactly what that ,dad new mom, whom dad loves, and he LL never leave N she too. New brothers N sisters. New mom new family, and whom I ve crashed, and OK I failed, and I can live with it, happy ending for everyone.. TO BE TOTALLY HONEST SHE WAS PHISICALLY AGRESSIVE SINCE 9 Y OLD N IT WAS GETTING WORSE N WORSE. I IT S EVEN SHAMEFUL TO WRITE ABOUT IT.
I have a rad child. I have custody of my daughter her mother abandoned her with me. What do you do when your child has a melt down and pulls the,”I’m crazy act” to throw you a curve ball. Last melt down she as the show tore out a small bit of her hair. Then of course I caused it. What do you do with that. It was a first
Biggs AARON, all you can do is keep records of everything, and share the information with her Dr, or Therapist.
You should put her into care. She will be happier with random workers who are patient and polite, but don't try to love/emotionally control her.
The music is very distracting
We don't need the music because We get the RAD victim child. We are here for resources and help not guitar solo that doesn't match the emotions of what RAD caretakers experience. Thank You for Your humanity towards so many Families.
Where's the link to the triangle drama document
I didn't leave a link...Im fairly new to youtube, and not always thinking or know how to do something like that...You can google it very easily...Its called the Drama Triangle.