DONT PLAY BARD (D&D 5E)

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  • Опубликовано: 19 июн 2023
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Комментарии • 744

  • @BlaineSimple
    @BlaineSimple  11 месяцев назад +229

    Heya! Even with the disclaimer at 0:00 , some of you seem confused on if I actually agree with what I say in this video. Here's my actual stance:
    Although nowadays I tend to join tables that have a firm grasp on improv and roleplay, expecting the same level of commitment from everyone you play with is asinine. So long as the way a player RPs isn't hurting the fun for anyone, it's perfectly fine for them to just play by how class abilities work. Everyone plays the game differently, and as a collaborative storytelling game it's paramount to be understanding of each other's playstyles and what we're looking to get out of the experience.
    As this video series is probably the most volatile content our community has to ponder, I'll see to audibly point out the disclaimer in the future so nobody accidentally skips over it and thinks I'm being serious lol

    • @ggfrt96
      @ggfrt96 11 месяцев назад +6

      Yeah, I thought it was fine... bard is my favorite class, and it's funny because half the time I don't play the role out at the table. half the time no one wants to hear it anyways. I don't consider any of this to be any worse than JoCats crap guide to DnD. he calls out people for the same stuff. I think the disconnect is people taking it personally rather than alluding to some fictional person when you say "whats that? you didn't roleplay it again?" which i found hilarious because i was thinking the same thing.
      (apparently I can't make well constructed sentences tonight, but imma leave it for everyone to try to figure out what I tried to say)

    • @treetrio6029
      @treetrio6029 11 месяцев назад +9

      Your singing made me take psychic damage which convinces me you really are a bard. Good job you win.

    • @hyzmarie
      @hyzmarie 11 месяцев назад +2

      Ehh, I roleplay, but generally outside of combat. Also, I don’t spam vicious mockery until I’m out of dissonant whispers

    • @Shalakor
      @Shalakor 11 месяцев назад +17

      I get the disclaimer, but I'm not sure if it totally matches the video. Most of the video wasn't criticizing the class, but instead the players or by proxy yourself as a DM for wanting to set such high standards when you knew they wouldn't be met. Can't wait for the Monk video where you complain the players don't spend enough time meditating and punching you in the face (I do actually kinda want to see that concept in such a video), or saying Fighters use the Attack action as much as Bards use Viscous Mockery.

    • @milogop3574
      @milogop3574 11 месяцев назад +7

      Yeah I looked away for the first 2 seconds so i didn't see the disclaimer and was about to leave a comment about how gate-keepy this was lol

  • @brynt91
    @brynt91 11 месяцев назад +1532

    I really dislike when people expect players to demonstrate their "soft skills" but never the "hard skills." If a bard PC has to put on a performance for you and the wizard pc has to solve a logic puzzle then a barbarian pc should have to lift the table or the rouge should have to actually pick a lock.

    • @beastwarsFTW
      @beastwarsFTW 11 месяцев назад +91

      Ironically the one I can't do is preform.

    • @brianmoyachiuz905
      @brianmoyachiuz905 11 месяцев назад +16

      Pun intended? 😂

    • @flynnhunter416
      @flynnhunter416 11 месяцев назад +66

      Me who constantly forgets my keys and has to pick my own door's lock

    • @beastwarsFTW
      @beastwarsFTW 11 месяцев назад +24

      @@flynnhunter416
      My parents accidentally locked my out of the house all the time.

    • @Dr.BDover
      @Dr.BDover 11 месяцев назад +72

      ​@@beastwarsFTWmy girlfriend always accidentally locks me out and sometimes she calls these guys she calls "cops" to play chase with me

  • @skyfiresage5980
    @skyfiresage5980 11 месяцев назад +951

    Reminder: Forcing a player to abandon the fantasy they want to play because they, as a person, lack the skills needed to be a good bard is fucking stupid. Like as dumb as asking the Fighter to beat you in a fist fight to prove he has martial prowess levels of stupid.

    • @AModernRogue
      @AModernRogue 11 месяцев назад +121

      Came here to say this. The average 5e player lacks basically any of the skills of every class they play

    • @flameofmage1099
      @flameofmage1099 11 месяцев назад +73

      I agree. If they player wants to do it that's great but they shouldn't feel forced to do it

    • @Gamer3427
      @Gamer3427 11 месяцев назад +36

      I think his intent with that was mostly that bard leans towards heavy roleplay, and uses stuff that a player feasibly could for a lot of it such as singing or playing an insturment, but most players don't even make an attempt at said roleplay.
      In your analogy it'd be more along the lines of if the player playing a fighter had them be a powerful viscous warrior in story because it gave them stat bonuses, but because the player was an active pacifist outside the game, they won't even let the fighter take part in combat encounters.
      EDIT: In either case if that's what the player really wants to do, then that's fine, but it raises the question of why they're wanting to do it. Often characters made purely for stat/skill/spell reasons and not because the player wants to roleplay as that character, end up dragging down the session, at least in my experience.

    • @skell6134
      @skell6134 11 месяцев назад +26

      @@Gamer3427 Hard to be heavy specificly bard roleplayer when you have social anxiety,ngl
      Im coming from point that i dont always exactly have to roleplay class only in one specific way to enjoy it,like if i want to play rogue im not supposed to be sneaking around all the time and if im playing cleric i not supposed to give praises to my deity all night long instead of long rest
      Same goes for bard,i dont really need to sing all time and do perfomances to do my roleplaying,there is really lots of different ways i can play my character and still make bard class make sense for them . -.

    • @gaberielpendragon
      @gaberielpendragon 11 месяцев назад +14

      @@Gamer3427 That's just forcing meta gaming.

  • @ENCHANTMEN_
    @ENCHANTMEN_ 11 месяцев назад +290

    "Oh you're a wizard? Cast me a spell irl right now. Do it. Do it or the spell fails."

  • @devonthurgood9381
    @devonthurgood9381 11 месяцев назад +122

    I used to rule that enemies who saved against vicious mockery came up with a sick comeback, but then I realized it was sometimes funnier for dumber enemies to come up with a really bad comeback that they *thought* was good.

    • @Lilith_Harbinger
      @Lilith_Harbinger 10 месяцев назад +15

      Maybe the joke just flew over their head. They just didn't understand it's insulting.

  • @TimmyGC
    @TimmyGC 11 месяцев назад +184

    I am playing bard to overcome these hurtful stereoty-
    -Fighter: "Why aren't you trying to seduce the bbeg?"

    • @skell6134
      @skell6134 11 месяцев назад +22

      My Bardlock:"Hey,DM can i please Eldritch smite his ass ?"

    • @morepenguins6247
      @morepenguins6247 11 месяцев назад +21

      @@skell6134 Eldritch Mockery

    • @skell6134
      @skell6134 11 месяцев назад +14

      @@morepenguins6247 And i probably would've added mobile flourish to that but that a**hole isnt worth wasting inspiration usage,lol

  • @ElNerdoLoco
    @ElNerdoLoco 11 месяцев назад +204

    So, I went to college on a music scholarship, minored in English lit, and I play a lore bard... as an insult comic. I had some good credentials, and still did it wrong. SILVERY BARBS!

    • @trently89
      @trently89 11 месяцев назад +2

      what do you mean "did it wrong"? if you roleplayed, then you did it right

  • @dualitydisorder
    @dualitydisorder 11 месяцев назад +108

    I know this is satire but i can't contain it.
    BARDS DON'T HAVE TO SING OR DANCE!! IT JUST HAS TO BE SOME FORM OF INSPIRING SKILL!
    it can be painting, Oration, battle cries, sculpting, storytelling, powerlifting, tumbling, advertisement, stand up comedy, VENTRILOQUISM! THE LIST GOES ON.
    Bard is my favorite class tying with warlock, and i can't stand watching either of them getting pigeonholed into a stereotype.

    • @edwardg8912
      @edwardg8912 11 месяцев назад +3

      First campaign I played in, one of my buddies played a mime bard.

    • @dualitydisorder
      @dualitydisorder 11 месяцев назад +6

      @@edwardg8912 that sounds really cool! my last bard was a business man who's inspiration was power point presentations

    • @trently89
      @trently89 11 месяцев назад +1

      AMEN

    • @sev1120
      @sev1120 10 месяцев назад +4

      Hell, make a bard who casts spells by just quoting memes!

    • @Geckoreo
      @Geckoreo 5 месяцев назад +1

      @@sev1120 example one:
      your mom

  • @douglasphillips5870
    @douglasphillips5870 11 месяцев назад +157

    Not only does my bard not sing and dance, it is a feature of the character. He's a bard, not a minstrel. He is a sophisticated socialite who uses his force of personality to bend reality to his will. He's not some clown here to amuse you. He uses a component pouch for his spells, and he'll glare at you if you ask him to sing a song.

    • @trently89
      @trently89 11 месяцев назад +13

      hey if you want to roleplay a bard that doesn't sing and dance and play music, i'm absolutely okay with that! that's part of the creativity of the game! I love this idea!

    • @SkoomaGodDovahkiin666
      @SkoomaGodDovahkiin666 9 месяцев назад +17

      So a based Lore bard who is more logician/lawyer? Noice.

  • @thatonebean141
    @thatonebean141 11 месяцев назад +98

    I'll be spending the whole round of combat cooking up the perfect flavor song, picking the most scathing pique or plotting how the music harm my foe, only for my teammates to do something crazy/stupid/unexpected and i'm stuck on a vine reference

    • @trently89
      @trently89 11 месяцев назад

      been there myself! classic d and d 5e

  • @blindmanflamingfishdafeesh
    @blindmanflamingfishdafeesh 11 месяцев назад +99

    I actually used vicious mockery once to communicate with a goblin when I didn't speak their language. VM says that they understand anything you say, so I yelled at them to tell me how to get out of a cave. The DM actually let me do this.

    • @thebuzzard4543
      @thebuzzard4543 10 месяцев назад +13

      giga brain

    • @Y0G0FU
      @Y0G0FU 10 месяцев назад +8

      I guess you rolled a Nat 20 on your Int and Wisdom check with that one. Brilliant use of VM. Iam going to ehm borrow that idea for a future Campaign. :P

    • @skycastrum5803
      @skycastrum5803 8 месяцев назад

      “How do we get out of here you green midget nitwit?”
      “Just go around the corner and head towards the light. Gods! Adventurers. Clueless, every one of them.”
      Both player and goblin take psychic damage. Realize they’re both bards. Consider being horny together, but decide it’s better to both part ways and split the field.

    • @BlertaPupu
      @BlertaPupu 6 месяцев назад +3

      Yeah, but c'mon like it's the only damage cantrip they get DMs should give bard players other cantrips or stop complaining about bards casting it.

    • @JN-so6wt
      @JN-so6wt 3 месяца назад

      it's not that they *can* understand you, it's that they don't *need* to understand you for the vicious enchanted insult to still affect them.

  • @sammayes948
    @sammayes948 11 месяцев назад +109

    This … sounds like projection. Every bard I’ve ran into loves the dad jokes and some have literally sang at the table

    • @benn-wh8oh
      @benn-wh8oh 10 месяцев назад +11

      Honestly I picked college of swords to be a dollar store version of kamado tanjiro

    • @SkoomaGodDovahkiin666
      @SkoomaGodDovahkiin666 9 месяцев назад

      >Bard mains love Dad Jokes
      This is why we need gas chambers.

  • @The-Random-Hamlet
    @The-Random-Hamlet 11 месяцев назад +75

    My favorite bard was a goblin motivational speaker. He would use motivational quotes to deliver his bardic inspiration. Vicious Mockery took the form of demotivational quotes.

    • @trently89
      @trently89 11 месяцев назад +4

      THIS!! This right here proves what i've been saying. You don't HAVE to be a "musical bard" to play a bard! You can be a motivational speaker! You could be an actor!!

    • @The-Random-Hamlet
      @The-Random-Hamlet 11 месяцев назад +1

      @jfish1401 I am always glad to help.

  • @cooffeeduck3280
    @cooffeeduck3280 11 месяцев назад +460

    For viscous mockery our dm forces the bard to always come up with some kind insult or it fails

    • @someone-ww4jk
      @someone-ww4jk 11 месяцев назад +12

      Were there any good insults and can you give an example

    • @johnwilliamson4368
      @johnwilliamson4368 11 месяцев назад

      I have that down

    • @PyryKorh
      @PyryKorh 11 месяцев назад +61

      "Ur mom stinky"
      -The Bard for the 11th time this session

    • @pixelgaming8800
      @pixelgaming8800 11 месяцев назад +35

      @@someone-ww4jkbest insult I can think of
      “You call that a complicated spell I met a child that can do that with ease”

    • @cooffeeduck3280
      @cooffeeduck3280 11 месяцев назад +17

      @@someone-ww4jk according to the bard all they can remember is just a bunch of your mom jokes

  • @patrickhannon2694
    @patrickhannon2694 11 месяцев назад +211

    Bard (alongside ranger) is my favorite class in D&D.
    I hate the strict musical aspect of it with a burning passion, just let players choose their form of self expression. I’ve made bards that do bard things through everything between alchemy and Comic Books

    • @acec2428
      @acec2428 11 месяцев назад +30

      One of the best characters I ever made is a Bard who puts the Art in Con-Artist. I despise the notion that bards can only be musicians and I hate how the designers made everything revolve around music

    • @44burn1
      @44burn1 11 месяцев назад +15

      Sword Dancer bard

    • @skell6134
      @skell6134 11 месяцев назад +7

      @@44burn1 Amazing stuff for College of swords subclass,ye

    • @gaberielpendragon
      @gaberielpendragon 11 месяцев назад +10

      Seriously, stabbing things can be done in a way to make music, from their grunts, groans, and screams of agony.

    • @MonkeyJedi99
      @MonkeyJedi99 11 месяцев назад +9

      Why can't the bard cast with a few notes or beats and spoken verse? Or beat poetry?

  • @Eramiserasmus
    @Eramiserasmus 11 месяцев назад +26

    The balance is definitely in finding people that just let you find your comfortable approach to Bard.

  • @estebanramirez1178
    @estebanramirez1178 11 месяцев назад +50

    The funniest thing about this video is my first character was an interesting take on the bard. I read a lot of the rules online before joining a game and made sure my character was okay.
    My bard is a reflavored changeling that was effectively a sentient amalgam of art supplies that mimic other natural humanoid life. His bard magic manifested as art and other related things of that nature. I leaned into this heavily when it came to casting all sorts of spells and especially the subclass college of creation. For example, casting cure wounds was a magically summoned a cute bandaid I would throw and would magically fade away and healed the target. Casting Sleep would manifest a cute cartoon sheep doll that I would toss as a grenade and would detonate into a balloon of illusory fluff. If you have ever played Ace Attorney, that is how vicious mockery would manifest itself (an obnoxious and in-your-face spiky speech bubble) if I wanted it to be blatant about what I was doing.
    Prestidigitation was my bread and butter of a cantrip. Silly trinkets such as a lighter, tiny fire extinguisher, a tiny drum set that would play a rimshot, a hose that sprays magic soap or garbage, seasoning bottles, etc.
    One of my favorite magical secret spells was Conjure Woodland Beings. I started with painting any random thing that came to mind. Considering it was supposed to be random, I gave my DM a deck of creature cards that were available for the spell so that it would be fast and efficient. With that deck came the additional optional material component for me; I could create a deck of cards for myself and consume that to summon monsters like a game of Yu-Gi-Oh. Very helpful considering I used this spell more often for roleplay rather than combat and it would be helpful when I needed a specific Fey rather than a random one. (Naturally, we modified the pixie rule so that it couldn’t use Polymorph unless under very specific conditions.)
    Edit: Thanks for the responses, but don’t be too proud of me. His backstory was that he was the product of a experiment of a very lonely wizard trying to make her husbando come to life only to come out as a “failure”.

    • @emiruysal507
      @emiruysal507 11 месяцев назад +6

      Wait, this was your FİRST character? Dude you have more roleplay talent than almost everyone I know. The amount of flavorful detail is crazy

    • @estebanramirez1178
      @estebanramirez1178 11 месяцев назад +5

      @@emiruysal507 the amount of fun and chaos that came with this character was awesome. The DM let us take a harmless magic item at the beginning. I decided on the instrument of illusions which took the form of a paint/ink stained conductor’s wand. With a simple wave and concentration, it would crate both music of various orchestral instruments as well as illusory blobs of color that would swirl from the tip. It was my go-to arcane focus for a while and the DM even let me upgrade it accordingly so that I could still use it and not have to throw it away for a better one.
      If you want more spell ideas, here are two that just came back to mind.
      Enhance Ability manifested as face/body paint with colors and patterns that reflected the animal accordingly.
      Polymorph was based on claymation. To use the spell, I would rip a chunk of myself off and fling it Majin Buu style. It would wrap around my target and begin transforming into whatever my heart desired.
      There was one session where I was having a rough day. Normally, I would have a creative description when I would cast animate objects or use the performance of creation feature, and I haphazardly decided that any random object would just have googly eyes. From that point on, whenever I used those abilities and I targeted a random mini on the board, DM would stick those cheap googly eyes on whatever I targeted.

    • @trently89
      @trently89 11 месяцев назад +1

      i absolutely love this! and they're right you've shown more roleplay in your first character than a lot of people i've played with, and seemingly most of the people complaining about the "if you can't do it in real life you can't play it in a game". there's a difference between that and wanting people to roleplay in a roleplaying game

    • @ningun813
      @ningun813 9 месяцев назад +3

      i cannot belive i just read 3 paragraphs worth of content in a comment and felt like it gave me something that i enjoyed
      if you can make someone like me, a teenager that has very short energy to read something, then the thing you did is very interesting and creative.
      i give you a 10/10 for everything.

  • @apuapua
    @apuapua 11 месяцев назад +399

    Imagine gatekeeping a class just because the players don't feel comfortable or capable to describe in detail what they do through role play and do so skillfully. What's next, denying little Timmy to play a big brute Barbarian because he can't benchpress a cow?

    • @Tespri
      @Tespri 11 месяцев назад +50

      No denying because he can't take a kick from professional kickboxer straight to the head without flinching.

    • @basmbee4325
      @basmbee4325 11 месяцев назад +30

      my guy it's a joke

    • @turinmormegil7715
      @turinmormegil7715 11 месяцев назад +5

      Yes, cuz Little Timmy's Gramps could kill a Horse with a single jab

    • @SwiftKey_253
      @SwiftKey_253 11 месяцев назад +14

      well someone missed the disclaimer

    • @apuapua
      @apuapua 11 месяцев назад +24

      @@basmbee4325 Correct. And absolutely every other video he's got on the topic previous to this one were jokes on the class
      This was mocking players, and very unfairly. Just because it's a joke that doesn't mean I have to find it funny

  • @MrLinguist88
    @MrLinguist88 11 месяцев назад +34

    Well, shouldn't a good DM just remind the bard player to rp their VM or inspiration instead of just... letting it fail..?

  • @hardhatlunchpal
    @hardhatlunchpal 11 месяцев назад +19

    One of my players ran a goblin bard and he used explosives as his instrument. He would light a stick of dynamite and give it to another player for his inspiration. He also had different explosives for other cantrips and spells. It was a really fun experience honestly

    • @trently89
      @trently89 11 месяцев назад

      THIS is amazing!! i would TOTALLY play a bard that uses explosives as his bardic inspiration!! that's so creative and original and i love it!

  • @azearaazymoto461
    @azearaazymoto461 11 месяцев назад +65

    To be fair, if someone didn't roleplay as a bard, they probably won't roleplay as any other class.

    • @skycastrum5803
      @skycastrum5803 8 месяцев назад +6

      And here’s me who so far hasn’t picked bard because if I wanted to role play that fantasy I’d usually rather do it with a different class.

  • @luka2784
    @luka2784 11 месяцев назад +13

    I know this video is mostly joking, but bards probably have the third strongest spell list after wizard and sorcerer even before magical secrets. To name just a few, healing word, silvery barbs, detect thoughts, heat metal, aid, hold person, phantasmal force, fear, hypnotic pattern, leomunds tiny hut, major image, plant growth, dimension door, polymorph, greater restoration and synaptic static.

    • @emmasilver2332
      @emmasilver2332 11 месяцев назад +2

      Hypnotic Pattern is on there too if I remember correctly
      Edit: whoops I didn't see you wrote it in there, I'll leave this whoopsie for posterity's sake

    • @Lilith_Harbinger
      @Lilith_Harbinger 10 месяцев назад +3

      People who think all that matter in combat is damage (a.k.a Fireball) don't play spellcasters "right". A single Hypnotic Pattern can end an encounter.

  • @brianmoyachiuz905
    @brianmoyachiuz905 11 месяцев назад +13

    Got it. You want me to play a rock and roll bard who's basically Jack Black in d&d. Thanks for the recommendation

  • @crystalla7383
    @crystalla7383 11 месяцев назад +11

    I tend to not use vicious mockery until I'm at a higher level, mainly because I forget to get it but I also rarely use it except for silly situations.
    Glamour is such a fun subclass I love changing my bard's appearance because I genuinly cannot stop drawing him lol

  • @qwest9596
    @qwest9596 11 месяцев назад +10

    i just wanna have fun playing a bard and nobody in my party minds, it's my favourite class, leave me alone

  • @RayPoreon
    @RayPoreon 11 месяцев назад +26

    7:33 Actually, college of spirits really can be played in a way that the bard never has to sing or dance either in or out of character. They can put their instruments away and use a candle, crystal ball or the skull of that drunk guy that pestered you asking you to sing a pretty song. You can even just reflavour their spells as being them conjuring stuff from the dead. My own spookbard concept was a storyteller that conjures spirits of the dead temporarilly by reciting their tales. Spirit bards can also just burn their inspiration to feed their own turn so they can ignore the whole 'my team forgets they have inspiration' thing.
    There is *one* saving grace on countercharm. It can be activated whenever and doesn't need a special performance, so if you're mid-conversation with a mage or vampire or something you can just start ominously humming and it works. But that's assuming that you even remembered it was a thing.

  • @criminalmatrix6
    @criminalmatrix6 11 месяцев назад +6

    My favorite vicious mockery is from my college of whispers bard before mind sliver became a thing, and it was "Your Mother was a hamster, and had a horrible time in child birth because of it."

  • @michaeli5018
    @michaeli5018 11 месяцев назад +13

    My current college of lore bard is currently in college. His papers are on his adventures. The DM has me roll for grades...my luck is bad but not failing bad. Everytime I get a new spell level spell books appear from the college. My character is also learning things from a secret library that his mother had that the party found. Oh yeah next level I get additional magical secrets...can't wait for all of the other class' spellbooks from cantrips to level 3 to materialize in my character's room.

  • @robertanna2693
    @robertanna2693 9 месяцев назад +3

    Vicious Mockery for me becomes, "Your next line is... , now you!"

  • @vincentsverne6783
    @vincentsverne6783 11 месяцев назад +8

    I feel bad for everyone who has never played with a funny bard, when done right, a bard is the funniest player in the group (especially for the DM).

  • @guythasawesome
    @guythasawesome 11 месяцев назад +5

    I like bard because its advertised as jack of all trades, but it can really go much further than that. With magical secrets you can fluctuate your bard into whatever spell role you want to boost the role of your subclass. Its less of an escape than it is customization possibility, which I love (and why warlock is best class)

  • @comet.x
    @comet.x 11 месяцев назад +3

    oh, you want me to roleplay everything I do with the skills I have irl? as a comp sci student who plays wizards and artificers, you better be *prepared*.
    I will design an entire computer entirely out of magic mouth and programmable illusion, in character, and you better be prepared to verify it

  • @PyryKorh
    @PyryKorh 11 месяцев назад +5

    My go-tos for Vicious mockery are "You uncivilized Brute" and "How Uncouth".

  • @lyebatenkaitosofgluttony2452
    @lyebatenkaitosofgluttony2452 11 месяцев назад +3

    "Did you forget to rp your bardic inspiration?"
    My bard meanwhile; "if you fail you're cringe" *gives bardic inspiration*

  • @Heavenlyhounds96
    @Heavenlyhounds96 11 месяцев назад +6

    "College of Spirits"
    aka songs like Remains of the Day, Thriller, Ghosts, etc. :P (I actually have a Tiefling bard inspired by Jonathan Young's cover of that first song)
    Also, I did have a Human Noble Bard in a Dragon Heist campaign who was a College of Swords Bard who SPECIALIZED in Sword/knife tricks, (more the juggling, performative combat, and so forth than swallowing). He was a fun lad to play. His noble family was actually known for weaponsmithing or swordsmithing in particular but he wasn't direct heir per se so he was able to have fun and so forth.

  • @andrej8494
    @andrej8494 11 месяцев назад +2

    I know this vid is a joke but asking me to Sing every inspiration is like asking the Wizard player to do The Entire Verbal components for each spell, and asking the Barbarian to actually Turn red from Rage.

  • @dubsteppa8339
    @dubsteppa8339 11 месяцев назад +7

    I main bard and have never laughed so hard at a video lol Bard is what got me i to dnd as all throught my life I was in some sort of performing arts. From age 7 i took up dancing even doing it at a competitive level later on in life, was part of multiple small time theaters as a child going well into my teens, and i did middleschool and highschool band up to my seignor year. So when i learned the was a class that let me harness performance to make someone explode i was hooked.

    • @dubsteppa8339
      @dubsteppa8339 11 месяцев назад +2

      Ps. My newest bard is a gypsy dancer and is using that to cast instead of the usual instrument.

  • @LassBisharp
    @LassBisharp 11 месяцев назад +13

    This is the first time you've done a, "don't play," for a class I've played, and MAN did you tear me a new one with this video! I almost felt like you were personally roasting me! Thanks! ^^
    P.S. I can't wait for your fighter, and sorcerer videos!

    • @Tespri
      @Tespri 11 месяцев назад +3

      except he got pretty much everything wrong.

  • @justintime4041
    @justintime4041 11 месяцев назад +2

    I have never seen a video that could have been summed up in less words.
    “Skill issue” 😂😂😂

  • @Douma_UppermoonTwo
    @Douma_UppermoonTwo 2 месяца назад +1

    I have a bard thats a half-high elf, specifically he is a noble that has grown up mostly in a more comfortable position of background with his father (his mom died during birth). And directly, he has studied the arts of music of songs and history since the early ages of 13-19 years old as he was mostly taught other important things like how to create a unique experience of magic since age 6 to 10. He has never been through travelling parties before specifically, so my best point is that eventually overtime when I try playing for first time. That he learns and adapts to exploring with others, and perhaps he maybe learns more things about himself that he might have never known about himself before during it.
    In short terms for his backstory a Lil (w.i.p):
    He grew up learning the knowledge of song and music, reading books in the library and adapting to understand it and its history. By the time he was a adult he had already read almost every book he could get, but yearns for more. Which leaves a pity of him feeling mostly empty as he wishes to learn as much as possible through out his life while alive. Perhaps his *want* is to find a certain amount of knowledge or perhaps is trying to find a *certain type* of information of knowledge to gain the upmost importance of being worthy due to his emptiness of yearning more information.
    And his *need?* perhaps I'll find out when I first play DnD for my first time. Giving him a mystery to what his yearning or searching for is a interesting way that builds his character. And likely, whatever his need becomes, is what becomes his arc during his growth. 😅

  • @SirTashingdon
    @SirTashingdon 7 месяцев назад +1

    I once committed so fully to a bard character that I brought the only instrument I could proficiently play to the table - a kazoo. I played it every time I used bardic inspiration or cast a spell, and the rest of the players were scheming to kill my character after session 1. One session the player next to me slapped the kazoo out of my mouth, only for me to stare him directly in the eyes while I reached into my bag and pulled out a second, differently coloured kazoo.

  • @octapusxft
    @octapusxft 11 месяцев назад +3

    I cannot believe you forgot the most important feature of the Lore subclass.
    even more magical secrets.

  • @pixal1250
    @pixal1250 11 месяцев назад +3

    3:24 love this FE3H reference (both with the character and the only two skills increase)

  • @smoldog1232
    @smoldog1232 3 месяца назад +1

    Everyone is acting like singing which is just talking but on a rhythm is a monumental task.

  • @MillieTheSillie616
    @MillieTheSillie616 8 месяцев назад +1

    I've only started playing a bard but the one time I've used bardic inspiration I did it a little differently then music differently. I'm playing the most conceded character ever and I told my party member in character "Do not worry because I'm so amazing that by just being near my presence makes you better at all things"

  • @lapislazuli9961
    @lapislazuli9961 11 месяцев назад +30

    I have been a fan of yours for a long time. I enjoy your content, this video included. I want to make it clear this is less a jab at you (I saw the disclaimer) and more a counter-argument for the sake of educating viewers who are just getting into d&d and take your guide here as the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Thank you for putting out quality content, and if you have ready access to cookies, go have one, you deserve it for being you and doing what you do. Thank you so much for contributing to the growth of the community of my favorite hobby. All that said, I am the worst of the internet and absolutely love argument, so prepare for egregious slander below.
    1) Forcing players to conform to their actual abilities in your fantasy game defeats the purpose of fantasy and roleplaying altogether,
    2) I don't see you asking the long death monk over there to murder someone at the table to get temp hp,
    3) If bards have to give insults for vicious mockery, wizards need to make up random but consistent strings of gobbledegook for each individual spell with a verbal component, random but consistent hand signs for somatic components, and have actual bat shit onhand for casting fireball, and if they don't do any of these things their spell fails
    4) Restricting the bard to instruments as the only means of viable artistic expression is dumb and I will not stand for it, you think you're trying to expand player creativity, roleplay, and immersion by forcing them into the bardiest aspect of bard, but I'd argue that you're reducing it by taking away a myriad of options for expressing the character that might make a more interesting experience than the hundredth cookie cutter struggling musician bard this week. If the spirits bard can, both in flavor and mechanics, replace the instrument with a motherf*cking tarot card reading, why shouldn't the swords bard have a sword swallowing act and juggling, or the whispers bard weave a convincing fiction about some monster under the bed? Why shouldn't the glamour bard use fashion, the lore bard tell stories, the eloquence bard be *fucking* *eloquent?*
    5) If you think bards are underpowered as your comments on their spell list and skill monkeying imply, why the hell are you nerfing their main spell by making it incredibly situational by having it be dependent on the enemy being notably mockable and susceptible to verbal abuse
    6) As someone with 8 years of classical vocal training, I can say with confidence that your song for valor bard was hot garbage and if that's the standard you're setting and people aren't meeting it the problem is your players specifically and not the class,
    6b) and I *did* do that my first time playing bard because I thought that was the standard and it was so annoying the campaign fell apart after seven sessions because there is nothing fun about one party member breaking gameplay constantly to find a way to make "empowering another party member so they can do cool shit" so hilariously self-centered (and for that matter repetitive as fuck after 2 fights)
    6c) and by the way as an addendum to the bit in 6 about your players specifically being the problem, see exhibit b, your opinion of a whispers bard. I have never seen someone use that as an excuse to be shitty, and if someone is doing that, talk to them about it and actually solve the problem instead of making passive-aggressive youtube videos on the subject
    7) if the skills you have expertise in are being ignored by the dm, talk to them about it. So many "problems with bard" solved by basic communication.
    8) yeah ok you're right about countercharm
    9) yeah ok you're right about level 20 but I mean who survives to level 20 as a bard- wait...
    10) YES I AM FUNNY AND ORIGINAL YOU TAKE THAT BACK

    • @BlaineSimple
      @BlaineSimple  11 месяцев назад +7

      While not trapped in "evil Blaine Simple" mode while writing this comment, I basically agree. Except for #6, the tune was meant to showcase a quick rhyme you could whip out to hype up giving inspiration, and to 'slander' people who don't go the extra mile to do so. That's covered by your #2 already, but your take here may be worse than my fake satirical one.
      Also for #4, bards, in the rules, are required to use instruments to cast spells. The only exception comes from newer subclasses that give alternate foci. Good luck persuading any Adventure's League game to let you get away from that one lol.

    • @lapislazuli9961
      @lapislazuli9961 11 месяцев назад +8

      @@BlaineSimple While not trapped in "worst of the internet" mode, I also disagree with #6 (and also sorry I didn't mean it). I'm sticking with 4, though, because I think it makes the game more fun and the players more creative/descriptive when they're given more freedom on what they're describing, especially since it still more-or-less fits the idea/theme of the class to expand music out into art in general. It probably wouldn't fly at adventurer's league, true, but that's because they prioritize fair over fun. I can certainly see balancing issues around, for example, voice/singing being a spell focus, because that functionally just makes material components verbal (and it frees hands up for somatic), but for my home table I'm comfortable making some homebrew rules around balancing that. Although not wanting to bother going out of your way to change a class's flavor and deal with the mechanical ramifications for a player who's probably going to die or drop the character when they get tired of creativity is 100% understandable. Also, mildly unrelated tangent, I'm realizing if using your instrument is the spell focus, most bards can't use spells with somatic components in general? Like, focus replaces material, not somatic, and most instruments (lute, flute, bagpipes, drums, etc) take two hands to play. Anyway have a nice day, I hope you enjoyed the cookie, and thanks for wishing me luck those Adventurer's League stiffs won't know what hit 'em

    • @ningun813
      @ningun813 9 месяцев назад +2

      @@lapislazuli9961 "bardiest aspect of bard"
      i honesstly think that is something we need to use more often

    • @callmeemery8744
      @callmeemery8744 8 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@BlaineSimpleBards aren't required to use a musical instrument. They can use a component pouch.

    • @santawithaflamethrower2758
      @santawithaflamethrower2758 4 месяца назад +1

      I will have you know I love yelling random Gobledeegook as a wizard as I cast fireball and other less important spells

  • @andrewbouse8968
    @andrewbouse8968 8 месяцев назад +2

    bold of you to assume I can't play a musical instrument.

  • @cage5577
    @cage5577 11 месяцев назад +5

    I know its a joke but lets be real, I can lift more than our fighter, paladin, or barbarian could irl so they should fail every single strength check while i pass mine with my -8 strength in game. The extra points in skills depends on what you also can use them fir because i got tons of use out of double performance whether it be for distraction or money making when in towns. As a bard I do use more than vicious mockery simply because you can really do some major disruption with their other spells, i dont really get why others do that other than saving slots. Don't do college of glamour like that because it is easily my favorite due to spreading your fame and influence town by town. I get that it's not the greatest class as many times I use warlock more often, but nobody at the table is like their character most of the time. If they were I'd be very concerned about the murders eating all the snacks across from me.

  • @yeetman4268
    @yeetman4268 11 месяцев назад +3

    I think what people tend to forget is that you don't have to play a bard to be a performer, my most recent character is a mentally unstable Tiefling Jester, what's his class? Hexblade Warlock, I just took the entertainer background, you should try it if you think Bard is weak or boring but still want to be a performer

  • @torvus249
    @torvus249 11 месяцев назад +1

    Nothing like coming up with a good insult for vicious mockery! ...only for the enemy to pass their save and not be affected by it.

  • @Cooler-John
    @Cooler-John 11 месяцев назад

    I love the bard. I have learned a bit of cello and piano along with preparing lines for my inspiration.

  • @sgthometar
    @sgthometar 4 месяца назад +1

    Man, I have the exact opposite problem. I love playing bards specifically to characterize them and I often don't feel like the world responds to it.

  • @KainSilverwind
    @KainSilverwind 11 месяцев назад +2

    Playing bard was what made me research about Charisma and read 200 pages on it. I think it made me more of a team player, usually inspiring people by telling people you believe in them and support them is enough
    for them to become willing meat bags to shield you from damage. Expertise in Deception, always.

  • @cthulhulordofchaos3465
    @cthulhulordofchaos3465 11 месяцев назад +1

    I have an entire list of insults (also compliments, threats, and flirtatious phrases) ready to go that are specifically things my bard would say, and I'm in the process of writing my second full song for him

  • @ashtonlouthan6002
    @ashtonlouthan6002 11 месяцев назад +12

    Can you do sorcerer next? I am addicting to playing them and I need a reason to not play one.

  • @King_of_Clovers
    @King_of_Clovers 11 месяцев назад +13

    Did Blaine Simple spend hours animateing, scripting, and speaking just to deal 1d4 pscychic damage introverts and have them have desadventage on their next attack roll?

  • @DaSauceDatsBoss
    @DaSauceDatsBoss 11 месяцев назад

    Bahahaha I love this. I hope I can binge these today

  • @theincarnationofsin
    @theincarnationofsin 11 месяцев назад

    This video bounced right off of me since, for one of my bard characters, I wrote not one but two songs about events that occurred during the campaign (they're song parodies but it counts, come on now.), and for the other, a landscape artist, I actually at least 2/3rds of the pictures he drew in-campaign.

  • @cosplayingchao
    @cosplayingchao 8 месяцев назад +1

    My first long term character is a bard (campaign still ongoing). Everytime I cast Viscious Mockery, the DM eggs me on to come up with an insult to affect the target. Same with Hideous Laughter being a joke or Dissonant Whispers being...well, anything. It makes those spells fun for me, honestly, quickly having to come up with something to match the use of the spell and helps me with roleplay. Thank god they don't make me perform, I ain't a musician.
    And the comment about people forgetting they have bardic inspiration is true :')

  • @baronvonpanzer6594
    @baronvonpanzer6594 7 месяцев назад +1

    You cant stop me, I will continue to play bard

  • @mareofstature
    @mareofstature 11 месяцев назад +2

    Something I've taken to doing for social encounters is to have the player roleplay with the NPC and ask for the roll at the end. This is one of the few things players actually*get* to do in these scenarios and I feel cheapening it with a roll and then explaining what happens just ruins the fun and the immersion. And no not everyone can be a great negotiator, so to balance this out, I keep a check in my head that a player must meet at the end and steadily make it lower throughout the encounter when the player mentions compelling evidence or a convincing argument. I also don't roll against the player in these scenarios as I feel that too cheapens the experience.
    For example, and this happened just recently. My players are trying to stop a rebel group from going to war with the nations capital. They meet with the leader of the faction. Because this man truly believed he's just and that the new leaders swindled their way into kinghood the check at the end started at 18. Evidence and convincing arguments from the players were "We don't know enough about the previous kings ailment and are working to find the cause." Check -2, "We have already done good for the people and we want everyone to calm down so we can prosper." Check -1, Second player chimes in "We are trying to find the missing princess." Check -2 and advantage for help action, "Letter covering an argument just before the king's death" -2
    This brings the check down to an 11, I skimmed over a few details like the players at this point have actively been working to improve the kingdom's infrastructure which appeals to this NPC, as well as the king's death was met with scrutiny. This changes depending on the NPC the kind of person they are and their circumstances. Most of the time the players don't know or won't remember the details, So it may be good to ask for an investigation or INT check to help the player and character recall specific knowledge. My players love this approach because it makes their effort worthwhile and encourages them to roleplay more.
    The ending of this encounter staved off the rebel attack and gave the players time to find the princess and the truth... We'll see how they do.

  • @marcusblacknell-andrews1783
    @marcusblacknell-andrews1783 9 месяцев назад +1

    Actually, the College of Spirits is more flavorful than you think, I once built a hexblood medium with this class.
    She was the culprit of a “Whodunnit” mystery I wrote for my “Ghost Story” adventure.
    So, the College of Spirits DOES have potential for some interesting role-playing ideas 💡

  • @legend_1220
    @legend_1220 11 месяцев назад

    Finally. I've been waiting for this series to c9ntinue for so long!

  • @jerseyboyce1
    @jerseyboyce1 11 месяцев назад +2

    vicious mockery is one of my favorite things about old dnd editions

  • @Avigorus
    @Avigorus 11 месяцев назад +2

    NGL part of me wants to run an encounter with a succubus who has a special reaction where she can cast vicious mockery as a reaction (maybe a legendary action?) when I can think of a fitting joke for whatever just happened (for example, someone attacks with a nonmagical weapon that deals piercing damage, she makes a "is it in yet" quip)

  • @ATurkeySandwichGAME
    @ATurkeySandwichGAME 5 месяцев назад

    When we were deployed, one of my buddies played a bard. He was normaally a chill, laid back, quiet day, but the moment it came time to play he took the bard role to heart. He got into it. Easily the most entertaining player I've ever played with

  • @PicoriElder
    @PicoriElder 4 месяца назад +1

    In fairness to Vicious Mockery, it is the ONLY damaging cantrip that is on the bard spell list other than thunderclap (which is melee range)

  • @rangerplushproductions3291
    @rangerplushproductions3291 3 месяца назад

    Thank you for making me play this class. It is now my main and I know how to play a much better now. Plus I play guitar so that’s good.

  • @transyuri4534
    @transyuri4534 11 месяцев назад +5

    I remember in the unexpectables when they were fighting that young black dragon and panic said, "What's the fastest way to kill yourself on a dragon: climb up to their ego and jump to their IQ." The slow headturn, the greatest roast in history. This is how vicious mockery should be used.

  • @IWestrada
    @IWestrada 3 месяца назад

    The bard at my table is not allowed to cast vicious mockery without an insult

  • @SwiftKey_253
    @SwiftKey_253 11 месяцев назад

    i really like the bard class myself, and i love when people actually roleplay their actions.
    i wish i could play an instrument and could actually sing so that i could play it more character accurate.

  • @tiziank.6975
    @tiziank.6975 11 месяцев назад

    I think this is actually the first time i bought something from a sponsored part in a video. This is a really cool sponsor, cant wait to play it

  • @sarcastic_ocupie1669
    @sarcastic_ocupie1669 9 месяцев назад +1

    I play bard tabletop for the unique backstory and storytelling, I play bard in Baulder’s gate 3 for “reasons”

  • @geraldballinger6428
    @geraldballinger6428 11 месяцев назад +1

    Viscous mockery be like:emotional damage

  • @mmaaoorr
    @mmaaoorr 4 месяца назад

    As a bard who's party members are a sorcerer and a paladin, jack of all traits is the most useful thing i got

  • @Bubbleztoo
    @Bubbleztoo 8 месяцев назад

    I played a college of spirits bard, but it was "Spirits" like alcohol. That was a ton of fun.

  • @dungeon_goblin2303
    @dungeon_goblin2303 11 месяцев назад

    I once used vicious mockery to insult an orc holding me by the collar to tears... It was a fun session

  • @linksstruepower7443
    @linksstruepower7443 11 месяцев назад +1

    The last bard I played was a satyr cartographer that was desperate to make something of his life sfter having spent his youth being what amounted to being a frat bro.
    I played him as a holy man, whose goal was to negotiate peace.
    Sad as i was when he died, i felt the impression he left was noticable

  • @byronsmothers8064
    @byronsmothers8064 8 месяцев назад

    I had a player at my table who was college of lore, and played her character like a college of blades. Kudos to her for not relying on vicious mockery, but she only took the subclass for the extra proficiencies.

  • @captainnossi6547
    @captainnossi6547 11 месяцев назад +2

    in pathfinder i played a bard that had a special version of viscous mockery and it took 3 turns. my dm ruled that i got more dmg when i used good burns. so the few times i used it i wrote a disstrack for the enemy. 1 vers per round

  • @comet.x
    @comet.x 11 месяцев назад +2

    'jack of all trades is useless'
    me, who knows jack of all trades applies to initiative:

  • @pianosamanya
    @pianosamanya 10 месяцев назад

    The reason why I play a bard is because of the way I can use my bard in the most easy way possible but despite being very squishy my bard still is pretty much oblivious

  • @ryubimaru
    @ryubimaru 11 месяцев назад

    my table's best vicous mockery was following the dumb troll around playing the tuba and hiding when he turns to look

  • @thatmood4236
    @thatmood4236 11 месяцев назад +1

    Unironicly i have a sword of collage bard in my campaign and he pulls out a ukulele to play music, he gives 2 minutes preformance's and is godlike

  • @lolbots686
    @lolbots686 11 месяцев назад +1

    Vicious mockery idea
    "Huh. Neat. Are you done?"

  • @KajDarkwind
    @KajDarkwind 11 месяцев назад

    For me, I've always seen bard as a great support class, and that especially includes having so many skills. Having low numbers in a skill that you're proficient with is perfect for helping other characters who have high numbers in those skills to give them advantage on the check (when the dm allows).

  • @bombzyq8760
    @bombzyq8760 11 месяцев назад +1

    “Hey(with rizz)” the character 💯

  • @Alpha_Synergy
    @Alpha_Synergy 11 месяцев назад +1

    One example I have for soft vs. hard skills was when my bard was attempting to calm down a storm goddess through dance (think mardi gras, but directed toward stopping a yearly rampage up the Mississippi by an angry storm goddess and her minions). See, up until that point, I had been able to play the character very thoroughly, as he had mostly been an investigator; but when it came time for the court trained bard to socialize with the storm goddess, I had to tell my DM, "At this point, I'd like Sieh (my character) to take over. I am fine with acting out the investigations, the interrogations and disguises; however, I do not know how to handle myself in a social situation like this, whereas Sieh would know exactly what to do." After this, the DM took over for me and allowed my character to essentially cutscene his way through the rest of the social encounter with far more grace than I had in me.

  • @jaykay8426
    @jaykay8426 11 месяцев назад

    Silence spell: “Allow me to introduce myself”

  • @heatherreagan8078
    @heatherreagan8078 11 месяцев назад

    I have 3 bards myself. One shoots a bow, one uses a whip to trip opponents, and the third stabs with a falcata.

  • @starlepus9437
    @starlepus9437 11 месяцев назад +1

    you cant stop me! i'll only ever play bard!

    • @pixal1250
      @pixal1250 11 месяцев назад

      Yessir join the the bard side

  • @tf2sniper449
    @tf2sniper449 8 месяцев назад

    My favorite bard character was a collage of glamour warforged based on metaton. It was a lot of fun.

  • @johnhenley3966
    @johnhenley3966 11 месяцев назад

    on a recent campain our campain only lasted 2 sessions because we forgot to do a medicine check on the bbeg who seamed dead because of guards saying she was dead and a 23 perception check not revealing their death

  • @THEMrFill
    @THEMrFill 11 месяцев назад

    My Bard player actually told jokes for VM, would either sing a ditty or say a rhyme for inspiration, and was a College of Lore (he was a Harper too) - he was always entertaining at the table and even described how he'd do counter spells... My favourite was his little "nope" song when someone tried to teleport away 🤣

  • @LeDoubleTap
    @LeDoubleTap 29 дней назад

    Damn, I feel so much better about my Bard Roleplay now, got me feeling like the top 1% of the class 😂😂

  • @cyberlime2745
    @cyberlime2745 8 месяцев назад

    I had a bard in a game and we were fighting a gelatinous cube and to cast vicious mockery on it I did an angry river dance

  • @YourLocalPunkAnarchist
    @YourLocalPunkAnarchist 7 месяцев назад +2

    I find this funny- I am a goblin bard named Fizzgig Pipsqueak Rusty Blinko (because it was my plan number... I don't remember what number character, although at this point I really love my character, I had decided to have my character have incentive to leave, although apparently I didn't need any because the rest of the party decided to just kidnap me from the dumpster I was sleeping in instead of actually waking me up first, long story there. I had decided to be a Callow May changeling, and since their home suffered from pollution and Green Hags were highly connected to nature, I decided that it would make it so that the character would care a lot for nature, and they heard protest songs coming from above the sewer in a certain area every now and then, and whilst tinkering with the scraps of the Wailing Scrapyard to build new things, they'd often sit there and listen to those songs, developing and interest in music and anarchism. They strongly oppose the government due to multiple reasons, one is perpetrating systems of hierarchy to create oppression, extorting poverty to create wealth, family and friends dying as a result of government's lack of care, and the government using his home as a scrapyard. Currently where we left off in the campaign is that I got kidnapped by a band of criminals, and then they returned to the person who'd hired them to rob the bank, when the lady found out that I wasn't the character who'd died, she took off the hat of disguise and looked at me with a deep set frown, mostly because I'm wearing rags that has an anarchy sign sewed in largely to the back and the words 'Oinga Boinga' on the front, and have a mohawk that is dyed both red and green, through the usage of natural paints made from leaves, lettuce, tomatoes and blood. We found out that she works for the government and since she hired us to commit a crime and they did it, if we didn't do exactly as she told us to we would be arrested, seemed that my original idea of just robbing her and leaving was the correct option except nobody listened to me so here we are now, besides, the character who suggested that is technically dead. So she was threatening to arrest us, my character, finding out that she works for the government, naturally gets angry, although he does admittedly consider setting her house on fire and robbing her, but decides against it when the other two seeing what he was thinking glared at him to tell him not to do that, and it also probably wouldn't be the smartest thing to do, of course, that doesn't mean I won't ever do it, it just means I won't do it immediately per say... Anyway, so I as a homeless goblin child who has homemade instruments; lute, flute, bagpipes, maracas, a weird tube thing and a mini-drum-set, technically have not committed any crimes, so she asks for my name, I refuse to give it and lie, saying my name is 'Roy', obviously not true, and that's just a common middle name in my family so I just went with that I guess. So I didn't tell her my actual name because one; I do not trust her nor the government and after I pointed out that she had no leverage over me and she requested my name, I'm pretty sure that's enough reason to avoid telling her that. When I tell her I refuse to give her my real name and tell her she can call me 'Roy', she pursed her lips in annoyance and anger, glaring at me, but I just sort of held her gaze looking smug, so since she realised she lost that one there she moved on and just paid us all in gold. Anyway, so we got paid a bunch of gold, and I convinced her to let me be the bard for her tavern, admittedly I don't think that will go well, in fact I am hoping for a critical failure that results in me being run from the bar, ending up in an alleyway with a bunch of anarchists, maybe starting a band with them, perhaps joining an anarchist book club where books are shared and there's talks of revolutions and beginning to plot against the government in a decentralised disorganised manner with a bunch of random fellow homeless people, and yes I know that is weirdly specific but I'm just saying, it's happened in real life so why not in D&D? Just hopefully in this case nobody ends up dead and brutally murdered and their body hung on display... Anyway, that's just something Ima avoid talking about further, so on the subject of instruments; I actually do in fact know how to play instruments, specifically bagpipes, some types of flutes, guitar, and maracas are pretty straightforward, I do change my playing depending on what it is, usually I'll bring a flute, the bagpipes, and the guitar, occasionally I'll take the maracas. If I am playing an annoying goblin song, I purposefully play the instrument as terribly as possible, also offkey bagpipes are absolutely hilarious, so that's that one there. Other than that, I terrified our enemies away by singing a song in a disembodied voice seemingly coming from the middle of the room using a cantrip that relocated where my voice was coming from and added a haunting eeriness to my voice, and sang about not being a real thing and only being mist and wind and coming to murder everyone's children, so yeah, they were highly unnerved. The sequel to that was the song about loss of identity and magic and in which it was difficult to tell if it was the prisoners singing it or the dead ghosts of those who'd died in the prison back when it used to be a mine and enslaved people were forced to work there after being stripped of their power and magic, so yeah, otherwise I had a large collection of protest songs on one section and a large collection of annoying joke songs, including one made up entirely of dad jokes. Other than that, asn an aroace person, it's weird for me knowing that the expectation is for a bard to be a romantic, and so I decided to also go against that trope by not having any interest in romance and instead actively despising it and creating songs that expressed annoyance towards it. Other than that, I collected songs from folk-punk as that was the closest thing to punk that actually fit in our d&d campaign, and I wanted to incorporate punk music. So I have now a large collection of weirdly self conscious songs, for some reason a song about washing dishes and anarchy, another one about vomiting on the ground, and another one about being arrested, and another one about raising an army of rabid rats and urinating on cheese, but eh, its fine. Just some of my best lines from those songs that I liked though; "They said you can be killed if you won't be bought And with one hand in your's and one eye on the door, I said, "captain, take your best shot!" Well in retrospect that was not the best thing that could have said, But i've never claimed to be diplomatic, But it was our lucky day, and in the end we got away!" then there's also "I'm spinning in the next room. Slurring along to my isolation At the top of my lungs. I'm sitting here next to you. Sore throat from jokes about all the dumbest things I've done. I don't want to be anywhere at all. Here or at my house kicking at the wall. If home is where the heart is, Then I live in my upper chest." I just really liked that sarcasm in the last line of that little piece, anyway continuing, "I'm puking in the next room. Sorry about the carpet, Clean it up or your mom'll be mad. I'm pretending that I'm too good for you. So you can't see the worthless pathetic person I am. Better to seem like an (bleep), Than what you are. The billionth teenage boy with social problems To plays the guitar." Of course, the weird self consciousness cause why not? Anyway continuing, and also seems like it'd fit with the billionth teenage boy with social problems to play the guitar as that is Fizzgig's main instrument, but I guess that you can just add political persecution onto 'social problems' for that one there. "I'm not you and that's good enough for me. The only word that I use is (bleep), So you can forget the dictionary." I just found the lyric kinda funny, also goes with annoying goblins songs, then there was just this one I found humorous; "God isn't dead but I'll get that bastard someday!" so goes good with Fizzgig's refusal to follow any of the gods, after all, as the anarchist slogan goes; NO GODS NO MASTERS! Anyway, I really love my character, so I hope not to lose my character soon again... my dice rolls are terrible... unfortunately...) Anyway this is my current experience with being a bard, also pretty much any spell that incorporates sound seems to be the most useful thing I have at this point, surprisingly the cantrip message is most useful, I can give info to everyone so whilst everyone is on the field I can aid them with info and being extra eyes on the battlefield. Of course, nobody knows that I'm a changeling yet so... hehe, I plan to have some fun with that... Of course I have been leaving lil clues, they haven't caught on yet, but one; I didn't want the disguise hat, two, I'm singing a song about hags except in which they are portrayed as good, and three; I have a weird connection to nature, natural medicines and plants and animals, yet nobody has suspected anything, despite the fact I've been pointing at hints of a callow may by usage of info on Green Hags. After all, dislike of 'pretty' things, check, Fizzgig will quite literally tear the fancy clothing he is given and restyle it in a way others see as terrible looking but he loves it that way. He also refuses to take showers, take care of hygiene or actually do his hair. That is also a reference to crust punks technically but eh, long story.

    • @The_wick45
      @The_wick45 7 месяцев назад +2

      I ain't readin allat 💀

    • @YourLocalPunkAnarchist
      @YourLocalPunkAnarchist 7 месяцев назад +2

      @@The_wick45Understandable. All you really need to know is that my character who is a bard is a homeless little goblin named Fizzgig who wants to start a revolution and is the child of a green hag, and that the party doesn't know that yet despite dropping hints. Other than that, Fizzgig has been kidnapped by the party, and despite being anti-authority and anti-government and pro-anarchy has somehow landed themselves in working for the government as a criminal, of course Fizzgig isn't dumb so he did not give the lady his real name when she requested it, and he also pointed out that she had no leverage over him... But then he got threatened to be sent to the orphanage... So yeah, that's that.

    • @The_wick45
      @The_wick45 7 месяцев назад +2

      That is a much better summary 👏🏻 Thank you for condensing it down :)

    • @YourLocalPunkAnarchist
      @YourLocalPunkAnarchist 7 месяцев назад +1

      @@The_wick45 You're welcome! ^-^
      also sorry about my drunken ramblings- old habit from hanging around too many homeless scottish people when I was a wee child

  • @leviathanseas
    @leviathanseas 11 месяцев назад +2

    huh, clicked on this 1 minute after it uploaded without having notifs on, neat

  • @justinthawsetmyo4173
    @justinthawsetmyo4173 4 месяца назад

    I've been trying to have someone sumarise how each college is supposed to be played, oddly enough this video did the job

  • @swalke6861
    @swalke6861 11 месяцев назад +6

    Let’s play bard seduces the _____

    • @owlson2527
      @owlson2527 11 месяцев назад +5

      Dragon! I rolled a 20 so that means I seduce anything! Right GM? Right? 😊

    • @swalke6861
      @swalke6861 11 месяцев назад +2

      @@owlson2527heads or tails

    • @piketheknight2581
      @piketheknight2581 11 месяцев назад

      Wagon

    • @piketheknight2581
      @piketheknight2581 11 месяцев назад

      You really stepped up on the bard. Wow man. I thought you would kill the barb for simplicity but you killed the nerd for the opposite

    • @ToothFairy473
      @ToothFairy473 11 месяцев назад

      Miner