Dating In Your 40's
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- Опубликовано: 16 ноя 2024
- Season 1 Episode 4 | Whew chile the ghetto! Dating in today’s society is HARD, especially with social media and all of the apps. But dating in your 40’s seems to be even harder. Is it just me?! Ladies, the older we get, the more we know ourselves, therefore we know exactly what we want and don’t want. Our tolerance for BS is very low. Come join me on the couch as I share some of my dating stories, the good and the bad and much more.
Crystal's IG: / luvcrystalr. .
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Keep it Positive, Sweetie:
IG: / keepitposit. .
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Hosted by: Crystal Renee Hayslett
Producer & Executive Producer: Dinorah Peña
Co-Producer: Chanel Gross
Video & Editing: Kvle
#keepitpositivesweetie #healing #love #growth
I dated a Muslim in college… whew I regret not reciprocating his love because of religious reasons. Best man I’ve ever met.
Girl I can relate! Mine was more recent. Met him after my divorce and he treated me better than any other man I’ve met. I just couldn’t get past the religion. My big deal breaker was that he was pro polygamy 😢
@@WhatsnextnatalieTrust me Sis , y’all did the right thing because the Bible says to not be unequally yoked! I pray 🙏🏾 you find the men God As For You! In Jesus Name! Amen🙏🏾
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@TheeJessieWoo I thought of you as soon as she mentioned it. I remember how you spoke about him and the relationship with so much reverence 🤍
I dates one in college and married one at 40. Nope. You live and you learn. The one thing you love is the same thing thing that will smother you. It’s not wrong its just different culturally.
I actually went thru the same with dating after age 40 (I'm now 58). It wasn't that I wasn't attracting men, the mental stimulation wasn't there. I decided to join a dating site for people over 40. I actually met someone 12 years younger. We have now been together for 13 years and married 5! Love is worth waiting for the right one!
What’s the name of that site?
@@mikkinicholas7536 During that time it was Black People Meet. Not sure if it’s still in existence
lo amo
Yeah , I’m good on dating sites I’ve tried them all it’s the same people switching apps lol. But mental stimulation is very important and so is emotional intimacy I’m so glad you mentioned that! Congratulations to you that’s wonderful! I have friends who have had success on dating apps they are just not for me!
not tryna be rude but women as old as yall have no leverage in the dating market, its like tryna pay for lambos with no bread lol.
I ain't even 40 and in my 20's and this video had so much wisdom over my life!!! Omg ❤I'm literally sitting here just watching it all like this definitely the highlight of my day ❤
Do not do what she did , find a good father for your kids..marry before you carry 🎉avoid her mind
@@thomasandrew1575 if you genuinely don't have anything kind to truly say don't even comment at all it was a very beautiful message. Thanks and happy holidays to you ❤️
@@divinek7461 so u think 40+ and single is a good mindset ? If Jesus can't save this black 304s , why do us guys even try lol 😂 thank God my Filipina gf is more valuable
@@thomasandrew1575Ew, she stated in her comment that she gained wisdom from the video. Meaning she won’t make the same mistakes. You don’t rush and get married and have children, just because it looks good. A good father and a good husband can be two completely different things. Please save your advice for your Filipina.
pls dont listen to any women who wanna try to give u tips... dont listen to them... women try to destroy women... misery wants company... believe me. just stay with your man that u love... even its boring some times... ask every marriage couple that are still together for about 40-50 years if every year was magic/exiting/the best??? from 50 years i promise u 30 years were boring... its the way it is... u cannot have 50 years of full fun... it doesnt work that way... if u are bored than he did everything correct because u doesnt seem to find a reason the argue with your partner etc... thats why u bored... bored = perfect marriage... and when women are bored... pls get a hobby but dont leave ur man that u love... its just destroying your life after few years... specially if u are 40+... just dont do that... stay to your man. no matter what and u will be happy at the end... (end = if u are 70+ yrs old)
Dating altogether is crazy! The older you get it seems so much harder to find someone that is solid! Especially depending on where you live at as well!
I’m too old.. To play. As our PD, Pastor Daniels’s day..
im 46 years old, it gets better for us men, when i was teen it was like being behind a wall. dating was hard as a teen, but now at 46 its great great great. i love it. living my best life.
@@genovasquez8361 Where do you live though? Living in certain cities it can be rough especially in places like Atlanta!
@@istayzen nah Atlanta would be way easier. Than here.
My cousins use to go to Atlanta for freaknic back when was in our twenties.
I'm in saint Louis Missouri. Women out number us 14 to 1 here. Women actually approach men.
Dated a few women who moved here from Atlanta when I was younger they are really aggressive I love that.
But after age 30 for us dating goes from being hard to great. At 40 dating is on easy mode.
@@shannelnewton9236 men play games because we want our cake and eat it too.
We simply want multiple women...no longer interested in monogamy at a certain age.
I love your podcast!!! I was married for 20 years and now divorced for 12 yrs. I am 55 years young and with a man 11 yrs younger and never saw it coming. He has had his own business for 15 yrs, loves to travel, a lot of life experiences, God fearing, very intentional, and I am loving it. God always knows what you need and when you need it because I would not have looked his way with him being younger 😊. You gave her great advice, be open 😃.
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I'm happy for u diva
love this for you! and the young brothers are out winning!
Love this for you Cheryl ❤️.
I find myself attracting a lot of younger men and just decided to embrace it because a lot of older men do not have it together.
Am 30 but this info is so good to the bone for me, am not yet married no child and still seeking the face of God when it comes to who my soul mate is ...thank u Crystal for sharing
When I turned 39 I felt a shift spiritually and I am very content with my single hood. I have peace and I'm falling in love with Christ and myself 🎉 I'll be 40 in November, and I'm excited. Because I don't look 40 either
I will be 40 in November too!!
Amen
40 in August
I'll be 40 in September
40 in october!!🎉
Ladies, one thing I've noticed with social media is that a lot of people seem to THINK there's no hope for LOVE after age 40 & older. That's a LIE! There's always an equal counterpart in any age group, for both males & females.
I am 46 and thankfully I still have so many guys coming up to me.
Like she said.. there are so young in their 20s and 30s and it's interesting. We will definitely meet the " one" of we keep pushing and being positive. ,❤❤❤❤❤
I enjoyed the podcast beautiful ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
@@nardinequarcoo 💯❣️
3 good friends of mine are getting married this year! 2 are 43 years old and the other is 45! It’s absolutely possible!
Greetings. Thank you for the encouragement ❤.
sadly, they're all dusty.
I love this woman’s hair ya’ll!!!! Dating in your 40’s is hard and exhausting but you gotta have boundaries, standards, and expectations!
Standards boundaries expectations
I broke up with my EX in 2017 too! Singleness is a gift I have grown and developed so much since then. I am ready for my husband now! and I am 42 peace and blessings to ladies in their 40's still hopeful for love!
Can I love you. 🙂 I'm attracted to mature ladies.
I am 50 and never married . Best wishes to you in finding your next one
Love this ❤
Not hopefull to live love: BUILD or Strenthen body n soul to manifest n attract love : The Creator ...BE in LOVE ❤️ May Allah bless n accompain you n us in each step
@@rogers5622 2 friends of mine got married at 50 this years...love life , it will come back right away ...body n soul ...well connected to the Right direction 🏊♀️🔝
I had my last child at 39 she is 15 now. It’s not too late and we have so many great experiences together. Praying u all find the ONE and forget the biological clock.
Congratulations! 🤗 I too had my son (second child) less than 1 month from my 39th birthday and he now leaves for college in August.
My mum got my sister at 47 ...the Creator gives to whom He wants when he wants...take care of your health the best possible daily 🏊🚵🍉🍋🍊 keep praying before sun rise🍒 the higher moment ...the last tier of the night The Creator comes to our sky...be blessed 🙌 He ll answer us..keep consistent in sha Allah you reach your all purpose
God Bless 🙏🏾 you were still in your 30’s though. Getting pregnant in 40’s is a whole other ball game
Right
Once women over 40. Men start losing interest by the year
In my 20s I dated black women who were doctors, lawyers, business owners etc netting over 6 figures usually. I drove for Uber at the time. What typically happens is they start off kind and sweet like how you come across but when an emotional issue arises I became emasculated and insulted for what I made. I realised I'd never again would date a woman that makes more than me because not because it's intimidating but because respect on all angles is more important than love at this point
@masculinefinance4066 - greetings, always walk with your head high & know who you are all about. Money should never control or become a barrier. If you establish your parameters on those that will respect you & desire one that has confidence will gain your approval & access.
On a psychological level, women can't handle being providers. Modernity is pushing them in an unnatural position, and they're incapable of processing their predicament. Hence, this entire video..
That's a profound comment. In truth, I don't trust this lady. She has built a kingdom and as such, is looking for a queen; a man who must come into the world she built.
@@BlackPrimeMinisterI said the same thing she wants a wife really and any man who comes into her life will be getting a unfair deal she wants a assistant as a husband she won’t like him eventually if she want a temporary man she can do that but if she want a lasting marriage what she wants will not work,but she said she don’t want to be married but wants to be treated as a wife that’s selfish
@@GETBIG4WARD Yes. I was astonished she said this, that she didn't necessarily want to be a wife. Really? Who is this broad? 😆 She is attempting to steal men's time; a woman with absolutely nothing to offer any useful man could possibly want. I was surprised by the sheer volume of "relations" she's had, and these are just the ones mentioned on camera. When a beautiful woman (she plainly is) hasn't been wifed, there is a reason ⚠ You and I know why men don't approach her; we instinctively feel the weight of that exceptionally high body count weighing her down like a ship's anchor. She talks like an emotionally-damaged combat veteran. The nerve of her saying men of 50-plus are "too old" for this ageing broad with the dried-out eggs! The partner 🤣 she is looking for is a woman and she would be advised to embrace a lesbian relationship. There are plenty of "sistas" with the bull ring in they nose, and that is all she is qualified for. She is in Atlanta, after all.
This woman has class, charisma, and elegance all put together. She is so beautiful, positive, and humble, and she is the reason I've watched Sistas. Thank God I found her RUclips Channel. I can watch her all day!
Literally ❤
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Hi Fatima as you are referred to in the most beautiful tv series (sistas ) gorgeous you are girl❤ I'm enjoying your show here.
We are in the same boat dear #TeamFatima
Where can l watch sistas
I tolerated lies, & BS In my 30's. By 40 I had no tolerance for lies, or BS👋
you mean you tolerated life 🤣
What lies
Right! I'm teaching my daughters ages 25 and 17 not to accept any BS Now! I wasted too much time in my 20's and 30's.
Right! I'm teaching my daughters ages 25 and 17 not to accept any BS Now! I wasted too much time in my 20's and 30's.
@@mrshappilymarried1 whats the biggest BS you run into . Can you provide a list? Would love to learn
WOW... WOW... WOW... So transparent... Love this. I am 39 and in the same boat.... Been single for like 13 years by choice... I TRULY BELIEVE GOD has the right one for those who wait and focus on Him.... Keep releasing great content❤❤❤
I am so glad I bumped into your podcast. I am turning 44 and I don't look it. I just deleted all dating apps and was like okay Lord, it's you and I, untill you bring the man around. I choose joy and peace in this season.
Same here....not alone girl
Love that!!!!
Just be careful with that thinking/wording. HE is not going to bring potential mates to your front door. Be sure to get out, have fun, and be intentional about crossing paths with the man HE has for you. He’s out there 😉
👏👏👏
I am 42, and I have done the same thing.. I deleted the apps and I just said God whatever you want to do..
I can't tolerate inconsistency. Dating with intentions doesn't allow much room for foolishness. Also, knowing your worth is something many can't handle.
Well said Monya Williams.
You are spot on
Right on!
That’s why u die old with a dog or cat
@@richardredmond1480men die too in crack corners in the cold.
Being 37 and a married man, I can tell that at this age if i were single i wouldn’t have the same aggression towards putting myself out there and approaching new women. In a sense I’m glad i cashed my chips in early while my wife and i were younger so that as we aged and grew into ourselves we adapted together vs having adapted and changed independently then trying to find the energy to find someone to fit into who i am in my mid thirties
Sometimes that works sometimes it doesn’t. In a lot of marriages ppl grow apart bc maybe they didn’t quite know who they were when they decided to marry. Luckily u didn’t have that problem but it’s pretty common in divorces.
strange assumption, you and your partner will inevitably go through changes, you may 'cash your chips' again later - change is inevitable amigo.
@@HeyItsAbb Yeah I didn’t say we haven’t or won’t change I said we grew/grow and adapt together vs living 30 plus yrs without having to think about someone else then trying to adjust to considering someone else after 3 decades of never having to do so
@@dellasie3888 I think the rate of divorce increases the later you wait in life to marry. I could be wrong
I love this so much. We as women need this type of community for real. Thank you for starting this podcast Crystal.
Yes we do 💃🏾
Done with class
Agreed!
Right
Yesss I love it . This is me at 39 , entering in my 40s.
i love how relatable, real and authentic Crystal is !!
Hey Brit! Lol n I love her as well
Perfect!
very real
👍👍👍👍
yup
This encourages me because I thought I was the only one who felt some of these things. Thank you for sharing your heart
Tina Turner achieved everything she achieved after the age of 40! I also just turned 40 in October and I love love Devil Wears Prada as well! I can’t count how many times I’ve seen it 🫣I am divorced and have two kids. I consistently attract younger guys who have never been married and don’t have kids. The struggle 🤦🏽♀️
Coz they wanna smash and get experience for when they ACTUALLY want to settle down......
@@marlonjames7443 well said
@@marlonjames7443they actually want to settle down with me but I’m not looking to settle down with someone who doesn’t have kids or want kids.
@@tosin1018lol…. A man will tell you anything that he thinks will be appealing to a woman just to get the cooch… let them have it and then you will get to know whether they wanna settle or not! Women!!
Where are the men with no kids, who work, and are educated?
I am 47 year old widow with a 14 year old Son. I been a widow for 12 years now. I been dating someone who is 52 years old. Things are going great so far.
Congratulations
Happy for you!! ❤❤❤❤
❤️❤️❤️
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She is beautiful. Myself I couldnt imagine dating in my 40's. Dating has always sucked from my 20s into my 30s. Mentally I checked out a few years ago. I have never been more at peace. Especially when I witness all these so called happy couples in relationships and marriage misreable,unhappy, breaking up and divorcing.
How men treats his mom is also subjective and bs I’m speaking from experience, you have men who respect their mothers, but will disrespect their child’s mother, their wife, who they legally married to or their girlfriend… I call it favoritism.
@@calwatch1496 that’s bs
@@calwatch1496 and we’re no crayon 🖍️ color, the culture is called “black” a subculture at that, we all mixed up, matter of fact we’re the ONLY humans that are mixed with every damn thing under the SUN!
@@calwatch1496 I think parents should stop telling their children who they shouldn’t get emotionally involved with based on their upbringing instead of looking at their character and judging by that? how does that person treat people? How does that person treat themselves ? Do they respect their self, respect others, too many males saying don’t date single parent moms, don’t date women who grew up with their biological father blah blah, it’s not a woman’s fault because of her circumstances. It doesn’t mean those women don’t deserve genuine love, and beside anyway, men are in capable of love so if you don’t teach your son, what love really is which most of us don’t know what it is? when they’re at a very young age they’re going to grow up and probably miss used women anyway it’s in a men’s nature to be territorial take and be in control also predatorily, and you sound like a man Lord have mercy as the Baptist say🤦🏽♀️
@@calwatch1496 you’re lost, angry and it’s giving redpill/menospear you talking about ideology speech. This ain’t no damn speech. I’m just not indoctrinated, now that I realize you’re lost in indoctrinations for sure, for sure. No need to keep going back-and-forth. I don’t argue with idiots. I’m not here to convince, prove anything; you’re way of thinking is too left brain, like two left feet, you teaching your son a bunch of regurgitated lostness. The black culture which is a subculture as I said, you can Google that, is the only culture that’s lost in the sauce and we really don’t know who we are unless we ask our predecessors. Calling me a failure only strokes you’re toxic masculine ego, I’m not offended 🤷🏽♀️
@@calwatch1496 and do yourself a favor stop checking, black/African-American on applications and teaching that to your son because you can’t be from two continents, African Americans don’t have rights in the constitution even though the constitution is all BS it’s obvious that you hate women of this subculture this made up culture because as I said before we all mixed up that is fact, and just go date a European woman or Asian woman only the low budget ones will take you because no good woman with a good heart is not gonna want to lay with a man that looks at other women in their culture like they ain’t shit just because they made bad decisions, because they wasn’t right, taught a certain way, you are no knight in shining armor, you’re not a prize, sir …to a woman and you ain’t shit and unfortunately your son ain’t gonna be shit either with type of mind set matter of fact, he may bring home the type of woman you told him not to mess with and she might be from a different culture. Be careful what you ask for, be careful with the energy you carry.
I’m only 28 but this specific video resonates so much with my thought process when it comes to dating and relationships.
Make sure you watch how he treats his mother.
Girl you hit the nail on the head when you talked about your eyes being opened to realizing that religion was just put in place to insure that we were good people. I had the same realization early on after having grew up in the church in the bible belt of rural southern Mississippi. I backed away from the church and became more "spiritual" than "religious" started looking more at a person's character than of their religious belief. Like you said, how does he view and treat the women in his life. How does he treat the wait staff. I love those things.
As a 42 year old successful business owning woman I can say that everything you said in this one was right on point. This video was suggested to me and I don't know anything about you, but you've got a new subscriber now. Looking forward to going through your catalog and learning more about who you are and what your tribe is about.
Love ya for this one Crystal.
Am so glad Crystal started this podcast I love her sooo much 🥰🥰🥰🥰🤞🏾
I am 32 and this conversation is EVERYTHING to me , I don’t have a big sister or sister I was raised by my brothers so hearing you speak about the same struggles I am experiencing in my 30s makes me feel like I’m not alone and to be patient with myself.
Be patient with yourself!! Do not rush because its not a competition and do not settle for anyone I dont care how fine he is or what he has and dont let anyone waste your time❤
@@d.t.4150 🤍🤍🤍
@@d.t.4150 Thank you for this comment. It’s so needed❤
I turn 32 in a few days and you’re not alone❤
Same 32, 2 weeks ago
I'm 29 but I can totally relate with this episode, I'm working on myself in this season and allowing God to take care of the rest 😄
I love her energy so much!!! Every episode I laughing my heart out!🤣 She's truly a beautiful soul❤
Dating in my 40s…I feel like I’m watching this video, looking at myself lol.
Much needed! ❤
I'm 38. This discussion was everything! I have a small group of SINGLE lady friends who just get it. This is amazing. 💜
So at 38 you haven’t met any good men… or did you meet a good man and say yourself wasn’t ready yet
As a 49 year old man watching this video, this is the type of woman I want. It's not about her fame but it's her spirit. A woman who owns her relationship is very sexy to me. Meaning she is articulate about what she wants in a respectful manner. I'm a guy who's not into social media at all (just RUclips). Not into dating apps either. I'm sure the Lord will send or allow a woman to cross my path who is just as chill as Crystal..
I hope you can actually meet her, what do you for a living? Where do you live.
@gailmorgan7632 I'm an Appeals Analyst for a major Health Insurance provider in Raleigh/Durham NC.
I hear u but I felt the complete opposite. She seem more like a work friend or business associate. I think she was raised traditional but seem to be fighting against tradition. I got the boring vibe from her she wants a younger dude for fun but a more established man for her reputation
🤣🤣🤣🤣 Everything is big! 🤣🤣
@realtalk1709 I heard a lot more that that. From life's experiences, she spoke from her soul and I caught her delivery intention. In a nut shell, she wants a young/old dude. Older gentleman who knows how to move out here..
I am in my 40's and I truly enjoyed this episode.
Me too. Great topics‼️
i'm 23 and listening to this... it's helping me be intentional with this season and understanding my identity and value. I know I bring a lot to the table, but I don't want to settle and compensate for people's wrongdoings. I no longer want to look past things, but have those boundaries to not put up with anything less than I deserve.
How do you know your worth?
Hope you get what you are looking for
I'm 43 and I felt like it was just me! I'm so happy I can fellowship and relate with you. So many folks on this platform are younger and don't understand where we are now in life. 😊
And where are you ? Lol
I dont understand.. Why cant you just meet a guy who is 45 and just DO LIFE??? Why are you making it soo difficult for yourself..
I’m 44 I have to be honest a lot of women in my age group have dating standards that women who are between 20-25 desire which is why most men my age don’t want to date women our age women 44 have the same standards as a woman who is 20-25 I mine as well get a woman who is 29-25 not in her 40s I know that’s a rude thing ti say but trust me if I wasn’t married that’s what my mindset would be my wife is 44 but if ever got a divorce my next wife wouldn’t be my age it is what it is
@@TerryJulianLive she wants a young rich guy, woman don't date down, men do
@@An_Unfeigned She's single and lonely, that's where she is lol
Am I the only one who could listen to her talk all day long? Her voice is remarkable.
Does she have a Radio Station morning show? Her voice is for Radio
Yes you are the only one.
This was awesome! Glad to see that I’m not the only one not trying to repeat the mistakes of my 20‘‚ and 30‘s. We never stop learning!
lmaoo too late
Thank you so much for keeping this 100000%!! I just turned 40 last October too and it’s a struggle out this house!!! We praying for all of us out here!!!🙏🏼💕
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“Some of the greatest Artists… started in their 40s” - that feels good to hear. That “too late” feeling is real sometimes… so it’s nice to meet that thought with this fact.
🙏🏾❤️ thank you for the jewel Queen, Sending good vibes and waves of gratitude
Wow!! I can relate to this wholeheartedly. I was “dating” someone for a year as well but after all this time when I kept asking the question he says he thought we were just getting to know each other and thought we were just friends. I was like WTH he approached me, I gave him the chance opened up was in after 2 or 3 months but you say we’re just friends?? He got upset when I confronted him about it 🙄 told me to block him if I needed to 😂 Girl I did just that. He ain’t said nothing but a word. Needless to say I’m about to be 41 this year, still single!! You are literally telling my story right now!! I’m glad to be here!❤❤
Don't feel bad, he just did what you did plenty in your prime yrs. The world goes round darling
The fact that I didn’t know you had a RUclips channel until this very moment is just sad. Watching your growth and success is so refreshing. You deserve all great things in life. ❤❤
I'm 34 and at this point I don't care about what society thinks we're not getting younger we're getting old that just that.. My 40s will be the best time I feel !
An we be friends?
Wow!!! Your story is so similar to mine. I love how God is using your story to show me how far I have come. There really is nothing new under the sun, we just have to be open to listening to each other's stories and learning valuable lessons from them. Thank you so much for this podcast!!!
I could soooo totally relate the paying of the meals, the dress up, the makeup. All for some man to say Hi to us! The horror! The pain!
When I married my husband, my family was so upset. My Mom said she literally tried to stop me from marrying him. Family has a way of actually working against what God wants for you (basically being used by the enemy). I’m so glad that I didn’t listen to my parents regarding my husband because I couldn’t be happier with my husband. And both of my parents love him now!! Don’t ever let your parents or family influence who you marry or date if God confirms its the person for you because they’re not God.
Good for you
Hello beautiful am miracle from Nigeria where are you from pretty 🌸🌸💞💖💖
I definitely allowed some of the wrong influences in my last relationship .
I saw a meme recently that said: "Dating in your 40s is like thrift store shopping... you're just trying to find the least damaged item that doesn't smell bad". 😆
😂
😂 Ain’t that the truth
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I'd be careful about being programmed by silky little memes as anyone, as-in, even a 5 y/o with access to a smart device, could write one-up in seconds. Be wise because for women in their 40's reality finally kicks-in that men and woman are so not the same as most men can still impregnate a nice damsel in her 20's who will bear him many children, but women in their 40's are right at the wall. And no, freezing your eggs don't mean much as there's 50-50 chances it'd work, plus, why would ANY dude go through the hassle of seeding such eggs when he could just get one of many young damsels in their 20's who frequently hit on him and said damsel can do this naturally, over and over again too easy? See, women are 80-some-% consumerism and all the EVIL good o'l .sys did was to cash-in on women as they are cash-cows who DRIVE the economy, and yep, you said it, that's why they also pushed for women to earn more and be independent because single women tend to spend lavishly especially when not in partnership long-term with a man and her not having additional responsibilities of children. I could go on and on, but I need to start/begin my own podcast as I can prove literally how everything comes together full-circle as a near perfect PATTERNS catcher, and often can predict this game of chess called life several steps/decades ahead with pin-point accuracy as I did predict this very singles issue 20-some-plus years prior, which helps me be the best independent investor/Innovator as I. Enough said for now...
*silky = *silly
I am 38 years old and I can so relate!!! Chivalry has became a foreign language to a lot of these men, but your thought process is sooo similar to mine. This is my first episode of yours and I truly enjoy your acting by the way!
Chivalry died when woman start laughing at men who did and call us soft. They was going for the hard guys
Just finished listening to this podcast. All I can say is Gems, Gems, and more Gems!!!! ❤❤ You spoke what you wanted and look at God!! I see you out here living your best life!!!!
I am actually so very shocked that you’re 40!! You look amazing and thank God for blessings and wisdom ♥️🫶🏾🙏🏾
As a Muslim I am so deeply profound on your take in religion, I love how you said if we all followed the bases and message of religion we would be better neighbours and all around good people! Wow
She's right about religion
✨I absolutely LOVED this video. I’m turning 39 this year and very financially secure AND thriving. And struggle with the very same things ! I actually can’t wait for my 40’s because i know myself better, have better health, and truly know God ! Thank you for this video, sis ! I claim this year and the next in finding LOVE, peace, and happiness !
Really everything will be fine, u will find someone better for you
thats sad.. i honestly hope you get to a place where you understand companionship is a beautiful thing
Hey beautiful can we be friends?
I really enjoyed this podcast. I just turned 40 and something click with me too. I was in a relationship for 8 years and if we would have known each other love language we will still be together bc how I wanna be loved was not expressed and neither did he. I do believe that attraction is fine but if we are not connecting mentally than we are wasting each other time and age does play an important part in the relationship. I loved how Crystal was open and honest about her relationships. I would like a relationship were the man is my homey, love, and friend.
I'm 47 I was married for 25yrs. My husband passed away in 2018. I'm so ready for the next chapter of my life. When you are Blessed with the One.... Love is Amazing. I had that before and I'm so ready for it again!!!❤️
Adore her vibe & as a woman approaching the next chapter in life THIS is so relatable 💁🏾♀️🙏🏾praying for a happy ending for us all!
I just came across your channel today, and I'm fully invested! Girl, this was great, and you have an amazing soul. Being in my mid forties, this connected with me on so many levels! ✨️✨️✨️
Where has this woman been my whole life?! I need someone like her. She honest, funny, charming, etc. Loved this video!
You ain't Chad enough for her. 6 packs, six inches and 6-digit inc-- oh wait, she has dated millionaires, seven-digit income. Because she thinks she is worth it. Wahmen like this are super messy and unorganized in their private life and waste a lot of money on dumb shit. You do not want to be involved with any of that. There is a reason she is still single in her 40s. She is beyond her child-bearing age. That means her primary human strengths are gone. She's a broken down car you would be investing into.
Yeah you need someone like her to keep you single and show you how you and her messed up....that's what you need huh lol??
This episode taught me so much and really put dating in perspective for me. I haven’t really dated in years. And even though I’m not in my 40s yet. I’m in my 30a I’m definitely gonna apply all the gems I learn from this video. The way you do these episodes really makes me feel like I’m sitting across from you just talking to someone I know! Thank you so much! Loved this episode and you of course❤️❤️❤️. Keep it positive sweetie🫶🏾
Really 😊
I feel like you are speaking for me. I love my 40s man, the maturity is on another level
I found you by accident and I'm so glad I did! This spoke to me in so many ways and we are very similar. You are a breath of fresh air ❤ Subscribing!
friendship?
I too had to be open to start putting myself out there. It’s definitely difficult dating now. It’s even more difficult over 50.
I was just strolling on RUclips and said let me take a listen. I'm glad I stopped for a listen. It's always good to hear a mature woman's opinion on life. Congrats on your podcast!
At almost 42, I soooo feel you!!! I put up with so much in my 30’s that I definitely DID NOT have tolerate!! As you get older, what you look for and value in a partner changes and once God and I had a LOOOOONG and teary heart to heart and I incorporated Him in what I wanted in a partner, He blessed me with my amazing husband!!! My prayer to God was to not only bless me with my husband, but to also prepare me for him so I would be ready to receive him!!! Your King is being prepared for you and I am sending prayers and positivity your way!!!
Hey! Friendship?
I want to 👍 this podcast 1000 times! I'm 41 and every point Crystal made hit home..what a great conversation 🙌
Hey! Can we be friends?
Im 35 and I be having these young ones on my body. Everything that she expressed I agree with as well. This was a good topic.
A beautiful lady in her 40s. It's hard for her and most black women over 40 in dating because many Men feel they're too independent, ran thru, damaged , and all sorts of negative stuff I've heard Men Say. I'm 45 and haven't been asked on a date in 2 years. Men typically over 55 want women in their 40s or else they just want to play and not commit to anything serious
This is not a race thing. If no one is asking you out, that’s not on the men.
@@tinaredd6858 I agree it's not a race thing, but more of an age thing that many women encounter less dates once they are over a certain age. However black women statistically have more single unmarried households than any other race. In my twenties and thirties I was asked out all the time.. of course I declined those dates when I was married. It's definitely on the men
They don't want you be independent but if you struggling you too needy.
I have always dated women older than me. It’s a preferred preference. Unfortunately I tend to attract younger women which leads to some awkward encounters due to me being totally oblivious when they are into me. So, as a man, I can definitely relate. Most women 40 and over are already set in their ways and are not easy to live in the same home with and they date in hopes of marriage.
@@Deviljho5 I think men and women both are set in their ways after the age of 40. When they try to date younger, those younger individuals tend to feel like they don't have room to grow or feel controlled and molded. My ex-husband was twenty years older than me. even the first day that he moved into my home I felt like I was living in a Taliban government with no compromise or feeling or voice allowed.
This is my first time watching and when I tell you I have NEVER related to someone so much.! This isn’t even an emotional podcast, but I’m literally on the verge of tears 🥹🥹🥹 I love this and you Crystal! ❤❤❤❤❤
Keep your spirits high black queen!! God will bless you!! #TeamLibra
Queen ? 😂😂😂she’s 40yr at old single 304 still bragging about everything she needs
Amen!!! 🙌🏽 Will do!!! 😉 😂
I'm glad you started this podcast because there is a dearth of RUclipsrs/social media personalities that are single, never married and no kids that are our ages. It's different out here.
This!
Especially never married and no kids ….
Love the convo on dating in 40's. It really spoke to me. This is something I am dealing with right now. I lost my husband to a progressive state of MS. We was together for 26 years and married for 23 years. I started dating about 2 and half years ago. Dating today is sooo different! Most of the men that I have dated say they want a best friend, a good relationship and want to be married. Even though that what was said as soon as you go out once or twice or sometimes right after the first date the man wants to have sex. I'm like really. What happened to going out with someone for some time to really get to know them? I am not asking for a year of dating, but can't we get out of the first month! I am 49 years old and I have finally met a man who is 55 years old and that has been easy going and we are building on a friendship. This experience has actually been the best. His kids are adults as well as my children. We are still enjoying dinner, conversations, movies and comedy. I hope and pray that things just become even more amazing, but I am not in a rush. I trust Gods process.
I hope it works for you I really do 🙏🏿
Grand rising 🌞 Queen ❤! I've learned that when you meet someone, you have to see them not just through their eyes eyes, but their heart. The heart can only feel, but can't see. So be honest on day one. Clarity is important. Being independent is good.. just be careful by what you mean by it. Lots of men these days don't like woman using the word independent. You have to be ready and willing to explain what being independent means to you.
I love your energy..and I love this topic. Im about to be 47 and I have been dating a man thats 10 years older than me thinking he would be more mature and a gentleman..He has been the most narcissistic person I ever dealt with..After almost 7 years I'm leaving..All of my 40s so far..settling down with the wrong person...I travel by myself because he acts like he can't afford it..but he is attached to material things...now im leaving he wants to say he is going to counseling...7 years no ring no benefits....Yes single until your married...Have yall ever wasted your time for a man that didn't fight for the relationship until its was over..or I'd like to say fake fight dobthey can go back to their old ways.
I can totally relate to "settling down with the wrong person"....my 4 year relationship just recently ended. Im just making peace with myself & enjoying life experiences. I wish you nothing but the best! peace & blessings. 😊
In the exact same situation narcissistic as hell 10 years older than me been together 7 years as well I made.40 June 14th I have a ring 💍 2yrs have a dress 2.years later still no wedding date now he want to half way act like he trying to save the relationship or act like he care. I am traveling with him, but his conversation is horrible. we are going to an island, and he doesn't do water. I don't understand why he doesn't stay home.😢😢 I return on the 22nd of July on the cruise. My move out day is the 25th.
Sorry to hear that and don’t lose hope
Why did you wait so long to leave? Thats your fault for allowing him to drag that out for 7 years..you should have been strong enough to leave way earlier
I'm so greatful I got to listen to this!What's really lovely about being 40 and single is that you don't need much.Not money, not the material things. You have your own and you have yourself figured out. I think it's a blessing to be in this space. I really think it would be so lovely to meet someone who is also in this space. I must say though in today's culture most people will see you as too much, very few understand and appreciate such a person, and that's why it's so hard to find the right person.However please do hold on to who you are, coz you are worth it. 40 and single is great, you are not into nonsense. People today want to do what everyone is doing. It's ok to be you, and stand out.
Only black women are proud to be 40 and single,what a shame..
🎯🎯🎯 My Peace is EVERYTHING!
Goodness, I'm late to the party but, I'm so glad I came across your channel and in particular, this topic as I too am single and in my 40's. Crystal, I felt every word you said and I'm on the same boat honey, you are not alone! But, you're putting your non-negotiables out into the world so, keep speaking it into existence. You're a beautiful soul and as I always say to myself, "God is saving a special kind of love just for me." Be well love and keep blessing us with your positive energy.
As a 53 year old, I can understand your journey. There are so many things that I understand now, but didn't understand before. Now, I understand that once you hit 40, dating men in their twenties isn't the most practical use of time. They are truly in a different headspace, and often not thinking about children, regardless of what they may tell you. At forty, it really is best to date closer to your age, at least 35....because at that age the thought process between both men and women will be more aligned. Honestly, at 40, you also have to be open to the possibility of not having children, or having children later, possibly with someone who already had children or someone who would be having children later in life like you. More than anything, dating in your 40s requires honesty with yourself and others, so that no one wastes your time and you don't waste theirs. You have to get to the point where you don't entertain time wasters, unless you can honestly say that you're not looking for anything, except something casual. The more real you are the easier it is to filter people form your dating pool. Dating at 40 and beyond requires maturity. You're at an age where you have to put away your fairy tales and be realistic. Of course there are exceptions, but the rule is most often the case.
I wouldn't dare date a 20 yr old n I'm 40 they still learning but everyone differentI'm not here to judge
Men don't check for women over 40. Yall can't have kids
Absolutely love this!
im 46 years old, My true desire in a woman is under 25 years old and skinny with a high sex drive like. Women my age just cant hang, they cant please me. I am always the one doing all the pleasing and pleasing myself.
i like reciporcation. Plus women over 40 are not in my headspace either, they way too uptight for me, an things they want to do, i dont want to do.
we just dont have much in common.
@@genovasquez8361if that’s what you are looking for and desire, why are you watching/commenting on a video that’s about women dating over 40?
Crystal, I just want you to know that I am watching this at 26 years old and deeply resonating with your FACTS, feelings, and thoughts. I literally feel the exact same, I’ve been single for the past 5 years-and getting to know me and what I truly deserve and want has been amazing so far. I just subscribed to you, I appreciate you for this video!!! Thank you for you being so real!
Don’t listen to a single woman tell you how to be happy. You should be dating with intention.
Don't fall for this. You are in your prime. Find a husband now.
😂😂😂
26 single for 5 years taking advice from women with several fail marriages if I had to give you advice it would be pay attention to your man don’t let other women influence you listen to your man… the mother of my children sister told her she living like she in the 1950s because she comes home and cook they also told her the only reason I’m with her is because of the kids 😂 duh why else would a man give you everything misery loves company you don’t got to be submissive just smart
If you pay attention to her. You'll be single in your 40's like her.
So real, so down to earth, so relatable! Funny how we share similar stories and perspectives as women despite income levels, popularity etc.
Everything you said was on point. Myself being 45 I understand the whole dating after 40….I gave up after I noticed most men my age seem they had bad previous relationships…I still have hope but I’m not stressing over it. ❤🙏🏾
men over 40 are just having fun, women are own age we just playing with
@@genovasquez8361 nah mate just you and like mind overgrown fboys And if sex is the only thing you have with women your own age sound like that's the only thing those women want from you too, fun. The type of women you're doing after see you the same way you see them, unless you're going around leading them on.
When I turned 40 things hit different, it was a shift in every aspect of life with relationships that included family, friends, work and even companionship so many boundaries were set, and I finally understood what I required from people and its okay to be where I am in life which isn't acceptable in society eyes. I'm 5 years in the 40 thing and its nothing short of amazing, wouldn't have it any other way!! I still continue to learn and grow each day.. Ladies it's okay to be where you are don't let anyone make you feel like something is wrong with you because trust me it's not, You're AMAZING!!!
I’m with you!!
First red flag for me was i would have never let someone ask me to deposit 1 million dollars in my account. I would have asked a million questions before that. The older you get the wiser you become because of life's lessons. Thank you Crystal. Wisdom is now your mantle. I think you would be a good guest on the dear future wifey podcast, hosted by Laterras Whitfield. May God bless you continually!
She didn't know the amount he was putting the account
This was beyond spot-on Crystal! So many things resonated with me as a woman also dating in my 40’s! Keeping it cute and positive! Let’s go! 🎉
Hey! Can we be friends?
Love your video. You are speaking my language girl! lol Thanks for the funny stories! I’m 45 and starting to feel like a failure in the love/ relationships area of my life. I’ve raised 3 children. Two are grown. One is a senior in hs. So I’m ready to do me and find love and companionship. I’m always finding myself attracted to unavailable people. I don’t want to be anyone’s side chick or secret situationship. Smh. I’m so over it. Seems like everyone is in a relationship ( happy or not) but me. I know that’s not true but it feels like it. I know I’m a damn good woman so why ain’t nobody (worthy) trying to wife me up?? Shouldn’t be this damn hard! Some folks always got somebody. Some folks like myself been single forever!! Lord help me🙏🏽
Just about to hit that big mile stone (40) and still single but hearing your story helps me understand that we are all in this together and we will be ok. So thank you for keeping it light, authentic and fun. In other words, thank you so much for sharing such a phenomenal life story. You are indeed a fabulous lady.
She a true queen, crazy that's she's single. Dropping real gems. Whoever she finds will be a lucky man. Much love 🙏🏿❤️💯
I don't know who you are or what you do, but I absolutely Loved this episode.
As a God loving, spiritual, married 52 year old man I can tell you that you are well on your way to receiving your Blessing. And you've earned it 🙏🏽💖💪🏾👑.
Subscribing :).
She is an actress…. The show Sistas and Zatima
@@sunshinegirl37 THANK YOU :)!
She doesn't want you either bra
@@adub103 How do you know?
This is such a great episode! Very real.. love when she said "its not about what you can do for me its about how can you feed me" This came when she had things going for herself not needed a man but wanting one! love it
40 is approaching in exactly 6 months! You and I just became besties because I’m right there with EVERYTHING you spoke on.
ALL OF THIS! I turned 40 this year and baby I’m so fast to cut a man off who is inconsistent no one has time for that!!
Puhleeze desperation is not a good look and I’m not taking what I can get just to say I have a dude 🙄
Having a man is not the end all OR BE ALL
@@calwatch1496😅😅
There are no men fighting to be with a 40 year old woman when they can date women 10 years younger than you and its about time you delusional 40 year old black women stop deceiving yourselves and get real...You act like you are still the prize when you are not and you better grab the next man that comes your way
@loloakal796 You act like you have a choice when we got women 10 or 15 years younger than you out there competing for the same type of men you want
Thank you, for this video. I wish I knew you personally, like an older brother. As you spoke throughout the video, biblical references continued to come to me. Hear, and understand: Many of us spend out entire lives working to create something that prevents God from having HIS way. Then the day comes along when we come to the realization it's the very thing we build that prevents God from blessing us. The battle is spiritual, and the physical is what stands in the way. Stay blessed.
I am only in my 20s and this really helped me know what to look for and expect when I get to my 40s 🙌🏾
only if you wait til your late 20s to start looking for a husband.
Men after 30 have more options. An men prefer women much younger. So women are same age we just play with because they are easy to get but not what we want.
@@genovasquez8361Everyone didn't choose to start looking later in life . A woman can be " too nice " in her 20s when young men are looking for City girl types.
Wow so you actually want to be in your 40s and single like these women on this show? You should study why they are still single
@@rogers5622r perhaps the women were the city girl types in their 20s and then all the sudden turn into the “born again virgin” in their later age.
@@manman3792 too funny
Big sis Crys!! This is how it is for me even at 26. Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable with us. 🤍
Let's get to know each other more
Crystal I just LOVE your character. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE! OMG You and Madam teaching me a lot girl. It should be dating "over" 40; I need help too; (63) and counting trying to get back in the game is NOT EASY!
You are speaking for so many women in this age group including me. A lot of what you are saying resonates with me. Shaking my head, nodding and laughing to it all! I've always been an intentional husband-seeker, but what happens most times is our intentions are not laid out on the table from jump, therefore there is a misalignment of what's not been said and assumed to be understood. I've learned to never assume. If my upfront intention causes tension, dissension or separation because it doesn't align with his ...I'm ok with that. Because with that, I am further affirming my intention (being true to self), creating space for what I want (being true to God) and more likely able to discern and receive my soulmate/ equal yoke, therefore distancing myself from anyone I would have to say "Quit playing games with my heart 🎶".
Thank you for sharing your story. This confirms that I am not crazy and it’s okay to have standards 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Really enjoyed this episode because it’s definitely not easy dating in your 40’s but hit a lot of key points and great takeaways Thanks for sharing your take on dating in your 40’s!
I met my wonderful husband 5 years ago when i was 51 he's the very best thing that ever happened to me god is good you all just trust him while praying and believing in him
You give me hope. My mom met the best thing that happened to her at 52 and 16 years later, they are still acting like they are still dating. It's amazing. God can bring anyone together when it's in his will to do so.
Thanks for the encouragement, I really needed that!
I like this. God is all we can ever Hope on
Soooo needed this
I just turned 40 and dating has been sooooo discouraging.
This really blessed me as a 57 year old and have been married more than once. I took my vows and submission with commitment, but unfortunately others did not feel the same way, especially when sickness or illness is involved. Praise God 🙏, I have healed miraculously, Physically, Spiritually, Emotionally, Mentally and Financially. I have not given up on Love and doing it God's way and not mine. I love you and Thank you for your inspiration, God bless you, ( Fatima Fan) all day, greetings From Greenville, SC
Thanking God as well, my sister. We are both Survivor's. I'm Divorced woohoo and I'm also waiting on God to Bless me with my Man. God Bless
Thank you for this segment. The older we get, yes, we need to make certain that when dating, we are not desperate, so we need to be strategic about what we expect from a man in our life. My daddy showed me how I should be treated, and I don't accept anything less. Love KIPS