From Jen Kirkman's 2017 Netflix original special "Just Keep Livin?'" streaming now or buy the album version that has bonus material here: astrecords.com...
she is extremely correct, the only thing that scares me of doing things alone is the fear of being raped, and not that I look like a loser or that I'm doing this alone
The fear of rape comes with just being a woman not my independent travel. Unfortunately I have been raped by someone I knew in what I thought was the safety of my own house.
@@allwhatilove914 Last semester at uni, I was followed several times while I went through the city. I have been spat on and yelled at. People notice me. The majority don't care about me which is fantastic, but enough men have harassed me in public that I do not feel as free as you suggest I should. My parents did not raise a victim but this society did raise abusers. I hope it is a challenge of language that you come off so harshly dismissive of those who have been abused.
@@allwhatilove914 you really took this way to far way to quick. There was no need to get down someones throat like that over them admitting they are afraid of something. That togheter with shoehorning every accomplishment you have into an unrelated youtube comment makes you seem pretty insecure, pathetic and obnoxious.
@@allwhatilove914 I mean I get what you’re saying, but it’s also common sense to be aware of human trafficking/ rape stuff as a woman, especially with solo travel. Women are targeted more then men for human trafficking, and in some countries (not all) tourists are targeted since they are in a new/ unfamiliar place and it’s going to take longer for people to realize you’re missing. Also, I don’t think she’s necessarily saying she’s constantly leaving in extreme fear or anything like that, just that when she considers traveling alone, or doing things alone, she’s more scared of what might happen to her, rather then being judged for being alone. Which is accurate, you’re more likely to be targeted if you are alone. There’s still a big chance it won’t happen at all, but why risk it? The answer isn’t to not do it of course, but to learning how to safely do solo travel. Since you’ve traveled a lot, these are probably things you don’t think about, since it’s probably common sense to you by now. For someone who has never left the country, or has never been the organizer of a trip like that, it may be more difficult to see the warning signs and travel safely.
Watching this video just now it's a little bit of both from my perspective. Traveling in groups is much safer and if something bad happens like someone steals your wallet, passport then the group can help you. Also Dang it, I am jealous. I want to go to Italy as well.
@@rosabscura yeah I have seen countless videos of women traveling alone who are attacked and harassed. It’s sad but it is a real issue and traveling alone as a woman is actually very risky. She clearly hasn’t seen Taken haha
I travelled in my late teens to early 20's alone and no one batted an eye. But once I got married, people really react to me doing anything alone. I wanted to see Deadpool and my husband didn't have time, I went without him. People acted like I was the weirdest woman alive but I got to enjoy the movie on the big screen. I joined an archaeology expedition in Georgia in Eastern Europe (with Americans and Georgians) and I got questioned about it a lot by people here. But when I got to Georgia, the Georgian men were baffled. Georgian women were amused and supportive but the Georgian men kept telling me that they would 'never let their wife' do that. As if it were up to my husband whether I go? And he was supportive and so were our kids. I gave them daily updates and skyped what we were doing. People are weird about being alone. I'm happy alone and I'm happy with other people.
Like Steph, I would also like to know how to join an archeology expedition! xD On a side note, I hate what u had to go through with those who have such closed minds.
I’m so glad that i saw your comment! I am in that same boat! In a happy relationship but sometimes miss very much having my alone time and trying new things on my own. I feel guilty that my partner doesn’t always have the money or time to go- going on a trip alone I would feel bad that I get the privilege to do things he can’t. And he tells me to not even worry and go enjoy myself! We have taken trips together, but sometimes I just don’t want to have to wait or miss opportunities because he can’t. I’m sure I’ll get mean comments or tons of questions, but now I feel more confident that it’s not wrong, I’m not mean and I’m not the only one that does it!! ❤️
Georgian culture is strong in that regard of "male leadership" in families heh. It's quite antiquated at best but that sort of thinking is still kicking even in modern society.
My husband works with Doctors Without Borders and he works in literal war zones for many months at a time and people ask me, “are you going to go visit him?” And I’m like “You mean, am I going to go take my holiday to a place where I’ll have to stay in a safe room and risk getting cholera? Nah.” Then they’re like, “so you’re not gonna see him for six months?” And I’m like “yah, that’s how this thing works.” It blows their minds.
You have an interesting circle of people. Most people i know and have talked to would probably say why don't you tell your husband to stop going into war zones.
I don’t travel with people because they have expectations of what to do, and then you feel bad when you don’t go do what they want. And I always feel like I have to entertain them or else I look like I’m boring, it’s way too much stress. Also I don’t live in fear, and solo trips I can take in the culture and everything around me at my own pace :)
The trips i take with friends or family, we plan around our preferred sites or group activities, so everyone gets to do something they want. Then we all have a few days to explore solo or in 2s. Like my dad does street photography so he'll sometimes just wander on his own and we all meet up at a specific time. If i need to travel with a group it's soooo important we all have the same mindset. Travelling solo is fun cuz you're free to make decisions alone without having to consider other opinions haha
@@mmmgoes Although when things go bad like the airport loses your luggage or that time when a taxi driver stole my passport and all my cash, being in a group certainly helps. Sometimes local law enforcement is dependable, usually not.
I was so impressed with myself when I traveled alone one summer to the Canary Islands and everyone would ask who I’m going with and I swear with envy people would judge me for it and then I realized they resent my free spirit because up to then I never thought it was such a big deal. I rented my own car for the first time in a foreign country and navigated the mountainous terrain with the locals honking at me to move faster which after a couple hours I caught up. I never felt so badass and adventurous as I did that trip.
I know that this things can happen anywhere anytime , BUT as a Spaniard let me tell you that Spain is far less dangerous than US or other countries so you can't compare ( with this I'm not saying that It can't happen, just is less probable)
@@isabelantolin8339 Maria L merely stated that, even though people advised against it, she took the step to go abroad, see other places, do everything on her own. It made her feel good about herself. I don't see her say anything about Spain being dangerous. :)
I love this!!!! Work taught me to navigate traveling alone... i usually would have 3 days before a conference or something , so would have sometime on my hands... and explore the country 💃🏾
I have become convinced that people teach women to be scared so that they can control us. Not that we don't face real threats, but like nobody ever freaks out when you tell them you're dating even though more women are hurt by domestic partners than are hurt while travelling (percentage wise). They want to keep us within their sphere of influence and limit our experiences, not protect us. So then you have to ask yourself: why? How do they benefit?
I have no fear. I am a woman and I like going outside in the dark, I like being alone there where I want to be. I was never raped. And if thing happen then things will happen. Why should I keep myelf inside when I like to be outside?
Totally conforms to my impression that people in their 20s, early 30s sometimes, are pathologically afraid of ... the world, the existential nature injustice even, and allow that to restrict how they think of themselves and to assume that they have been born into a hostile world where the best option is safeguarding, not exploring. To me it seems that sometimes, this existential fear is anthropomorphized as rapists, sometimes as the capital, sometimes as professors. So my honest advice is: please, don't get distracted by the commonplace assumption that this affects women any more than men. In my comparably substantial experience, this is incorrect. I had more students I supervised calling me late at night because of an general, existential panic attack (unrelated to any event) than students asking for hints on exam problems by mail. The female students voiced different concerns than men: Typical male: "I am not capable of becoming competent in *anything* meaningful at, I can never have a wife and kids the kind of whimp I am". Typical female: "I can never become such a beautiful, tough, loving person as my mother is, and never become a women someone like my father would fall in love with." Yes, the vast majority said they had loving, perfect parents who would never do them any harm. Their perception of oneself in a hostile world is exactly like from young people with a long history of abuse, and I find this highly alerting as nobody seems to notice. I hope you can find the energy to question and overcome your conviction that men are the oppressors and women the oppressed. We are all facing the same world, and with selective / self-affirming perception of the other gender as the root of the problem, we would lose our most essential allies. My wife definitely is mine, since we met at age 17. I hope you can relate, someday.
I’ve been traveling Asia, Latin America, and Europe full time as a traveler and expat alone for the past 3 years and mostly alone for the previous 13. Still miraculously not yet raped or murdered nor kidnapped by ISIS. It’s better to have a passport full of stamps than a head full of weak people’s fantastical ideas about the dangers of life outside American suburbs. It’s not that there aren’t inherent dangers for female travelers that men would never even consider, but travel isn’t impossible as long as you take precautions. Having a man by your side at all times just requires too much babysitting anyway. Plus I also was in Paris with my now ex-husband! Haha.
Same here. Have traveled to over 100 countries in 20 years of solo female traveling. People who never went out of their state alone is so stupidly afraid of getting raped by anyone like if they were the main target on earth. We gotta be careful and there are dangers but fear would never stop me to do something I love. WTF is going on with this “main character victim” mentality??? As a black woman from a third world country I find it funny that the same people that call themselves “anti-racist” and “anti-xenophobic” are exactly the same ones that are thinking they will immediately get rap*d as soon as they step out of their countries.
When I told everyone at my high school 20 year reunion that I was going to Mexico and staying in hostels by myself for 2 weeks, everyone was like, “Oh yeah, you’re gonna die for sure.” I have gone on solo trips every winter since, and I love it. It changed my life.
The only thing I did not like traveling alone was all the men who assumed that because I was alone I had time for them. No! I’m alone in Paris! For two days! There is a million things I need to see and do before I leave again
Honestly, solo travel opens so many doors. I went to Dubai for work and met a Pakistani pop star on a desert safari. That wouldn't have happened if I had been traveling with someone else! Anytime I travel with other people, I get stressed about itineraries and trying to make sure everyone is happy. When I'm on my own, I can be a LOT more relaxed and really enjoy the trip.
I love traveling alone. When I do things with people, I’m always the one compromising, giving in to what they choose to just be agreeable. When I’m spending money on a vacation, I don’t want to compromise. I don’t want to worry about if we have different budgets. I drove up both once with my then boyfriend to eat at a restaurant I ate at in the past when I went alone and always wanted to go back. We got in an argument on the way up. Resolved it. Got all the way up there, then he wanted to eat at a different restaurant. I agreed figuring I’ll just come on my own again sometime. The restaurant he chose was mediocre. And that restaurant I wanted to go to shut down for good not long after. Only person I ever enjoyed traveling with is my son.
I love traveling alone. I love being alone! I raised 4 kids so alone time for like 40 years almost has been rare 😁. I will agree with you though...my youngest son and I are so simpatico we have a great time when we travel together.
I travel to an Asian city pretty much annually. I know a lot of people there. I will occasionally do something with one of them, for a short period of time, own rooms, etc. Any more than that, I'd have a big problem.
love travelling alone. You get by far the most complete experience and understanding of a place alone, when you're not bringing half your home life with you. Jen's also right about the dangers though. Not generally more than at home, but at home you know where and when they are, whereas abroad you're just guessing. gotta listen to the locals.
I can relate. I’m still single but love to travel. Being single isn’t going to stop me doing something I enjoy. On top of that I actually like the alone time. I generally enjoy being nature so National parks are often destinations for me. I find being alone in those environments a very spiritual experience. This isn’t easy to say because people can be very judgmental but I actually prefer it to company. I do prefer going into cities with friends or a partner. It’s more fun. Though being alone won’t stop me. And people are very weird about it every time.
And traveling with others can be tough. It’s definitely a relationship barometer. Not even just romantic relationships. Post trip, you might end up realizing you weren’t such good pals with a friend after all.
Well, I don’t travel bc I have a severe panic disorder and am poor, but if I had a desire to travel, it would definitely be alone. And I still get the “I don’t know how you do that” question from people when I say I haven’t spoken aloud in days, and I’m just like….um, I guess I just like me more than other people? I don’t have an answer for that. My imagination alone is more entertaining than any human I’ve ever met. lol
@@ascent8487 I am no longer friends with someone because of a trip we went on together. Quickly realized how incompatible we were and couldn’t unsee what I saw. Sometimes it’s a great test to travel with someone to see whether your relationship is what you think it is.
I 100% agree with everything she said. Me, my mother and sister all travel independently. I happen to not be in a relationship currently but they are both married and it does not stop them. I also have seen family members who are not “allowed” to travel without their partners. I appreciate the independence my mother instilled in me. Also my father who never told any of us we “could not” travel alone.
I’ll be honest, anyone who can go alone to things is a freaking legend in my eyes. I’m 16 turning 17, and every time I’m alone I consider how dangerous the people around me are. How close they stand to me, which men (and some women) stare at me for too long, wether or not I’m going to drink ANYTHING that night (water, soda, anything), which people could over power me. Being alone and a teenage girl sucks. I’m constantly afraid something will happen to me.
@@DeathnoteBB That is the worst advice you can give a woman! It is straight up using women's fear of men for profit, while providing a dangerously inflated sense of safety and ego. 99/100 times an untrained man will beat a trained woman in a fight. If you want to be safe either A: buy a handgun and get a concealed carry permit, or B: get a bottle of bear/pepper spray.
Same here! I’m already 19 but I really relate and I can’t leave the house after dark cause it gives me anxiety. (Even during the day I’ll get anxiety but it’s worse at night). But that’s because I’m afraid of being harassed, this type of rape (where a stranger approaches you in the street) isn’t as common as people make it out to be.
@@TheRealTaco I don’t think that’s good advice either. I’m a child, having committed murder or wounding a person (even if it was in self defence) will screw me up. Guns are a violence I don’t wish to commit to, also it’s not legal in my country to carry guns (or own them without a permit). And I have actually taken taekwondo lessons which have helped boost my confidence AND increased my muscle/technique. In class I can easily take older boys than myself. I’d rather give capitalism a hand than do something I will regret 10 out of 10 times.
When I was single and childless I did literally everything alone and loved it. Small town people don't get it. People from big cities think its normal because everyone has their own busy life and schedule.
I usually travel alone a couple of times a year. People are always looking at me with confusion, but I love travelling alone. The question most asked is: "Oh, but what about dinner?' Well, I stole a reply from a Dutch comedian and now I just say: 'I chew it!'
Being alone is great, every trip I've ever been on with other people has been annoying because we never want to do the same things at the same time, so one person always ends up unhappy
I have gone on many holidays as a single woman and spent a year travelling around the USA. I took trains, planes, busses and it was like there was a light above my head "Single woman, alone!!!" People couldnt cope with the idea that I was doing my own thing and happy with it. I always took my safety seriously and never took risks..have had the best times of my life..
EXACTLY! Now it’s literally my job 😂, but even before that, I LOVED going to theme parks by myself!!!! You don’t have to compromise with other people on ANYTHING!!!! Literally just do whatever TF you want!!! It’s GLORIOUS!!! 😍😍😍😍😍
think you might have both of those statements slightly wrong ........... being afraid of plain old men..... men make up 50% of every person you see, every day. are you afraid of ' every ' man you see? really ? then i would advise you to leave america and move somewhere safe, like europe. . the next one . obvious not every man goes around raping every woman he sees. so we can narrow it down to that small percentage of men who do commit rape. so when your statement is 99% more accurate, i'll agree with you . when your statement includes ME, then i get annoyed. have a nice day.
@@richard6440 Hey Dick, I was quoting a joke, so take a breath alright? I know not all men are bad. But, in all honesty, there are far more bad men than bad women. Just google serial killer or school shooter & let me know how that plays out for you....
Love this standup! She’s absolutely correct. If I had waited until another person could travel with me, I’d never have been able to travel as much as I have.
I experienced the same treatment, everyone was like "I wouldn't go to another country by myself. You are so brave" (that "brave" sounded like they wanted to say "stupid"). It was great, I would recommend to everyone, just carry a pepper spray in your pocket and you are good to go.
Im an introvert and I prefer to travel solo. Whenever I travel, I don't tell anyone until I'm on my way there (cos for some reason, people think it's ok to randomly invite themselves on my holidays). The people who arent aware that I even went on holiday until I get back annoyingly say things like: "why didn't you tell me?? I swear I would've gone with you". It seems like in their warped minds, they are my only friend in the world and the reason why I went solo is because I couldnt find anyone to go with me 🤔. I didn't have the heart to tell them that i love them but i can't spend 2 weeks with them on holiday cos they'd get on my nerves, or that I like the freedom of not having to compromise with anyone what I'm doing for the day, or hating the feeling of obligation to speak to them and hang out with them 24/7 for 2 whole weeks". That would drive me crazy! So I just say that I prefer to travel solo (they never understand that though). I love the freedom of being able to be whomever I want to be and do whatever I want to do on holiday (certain friends tend to stifle aspects of your personality). And it gives you the freedom to meet new and interesting people!
I interrailed through the Netherlands, France, Italy and Austria when I was 22... Alone... Until my parents thought I might be lonely and decided to spontaniously travel to Italy and surprise me there. Worst. Surprise. Ever! Seriously, if people want to travel on their own, they usually have a good reason. Maybe they don't like people, maybe they want to immerse themselves in a foreign culture without the distraction of a friend/partner... OR maybe they want to have an adventure without mummy and daddy by their side. I love my parents, but I still hate that they did that!
I always travel and dine and go out alone. I don’t want to spend my entire life missing out on life by waiting for someone who was willing to do this with me. Now, I have the opposite problem. When anyone wants to do anything (anyone, even girlfriends, my brother, my mother), I say, why? Why? Do you want something from me? I’m more uncomfortable now when people want to go with me now.
My boyfriend is the best, but a terrible travel companion. Very undecisive, hates rushing literally anywhere even if it includes catching the actual flight. Doesn't like sightseeing and wrongly acts like he's the best at giving map directions.
even the well meaning people are like. Wow, you're so badass. What an inspiration. It'll be good for you to be alone with your thoughts - re-evaluate life. Me: naw, I'm just gonna eat, a lot, walk around a lot, chit chat with some people. I can travel alone without it having to be some Eat Pray Love or Into the Wild thing.
I pity people who are incapable of going on vacation by themselves. Knowing that you are enough is the most inpowering feeling. Also as you go alone, you detach yourself from people’s opinions on you. You get to reinvent yourself and you come home in more harmony with the people you have become since the last vacation. Also it’s so much more affordable, you won’t believe it!
Shiiiiit been a minute since I’ve seen a female comic who can reach across the aisle and call out stupid shit in society, societal expectations, and it’s relatable for guys. Not in the same way but for ppl trying to understand what being a woman is like, she breaks it down in a way that doesn’t make me feel guilty for existing. No fuckin easy task!
I've traveled alone, including in China. It's exhilarating and i love it. Being absorbed in the experience. Meeting people I would not have otherwise conversed with. Lots of "I'll help you learn Mandarin if you help me learn English." And not just China! A couple of extra days in Mexico after a wedding. Parts of Europe. In the US, solo camping trips (with dog). I love my husband and we enjoy road trips together now. But i do miss those aspects of travelling alone.
I'm 22, 156cm, from Germany, travelled alone New Zealand, Singapore, Japan, South Korea and China before. These are all relatively safe countries tho so I did not worry too much. Still, if going alone make sure to read about the does and don'ts for the place you're going to, there's plenty of information on the internet from first hand sources, official websites from your or their government, travel agencies and so on. Don't arrive at an unknown place when it's dark, remember some street names, sceneries in case you get lost and limit your alcohol intake. These are the 4 things you should always do when travelling, for the rest: Don't be too anxious and enjoy your travel. Confidence will come with time
I encourage couples married and not to have their own rooms and to sometimes go have adventures by themselves it's good for the soul though mix in some adventures together occasionally too
I’ve been single my whole life and loved doing things by myself. I never felt lonely tho I was alone, it never made me feel weird like how my friends are all attached to the hip with their partners. I often feel suffocated when men I date tell me they can never be by themselves and that they will NEVER travel alone or do anything by themselves. Just makes me feel like I have to be a caretaker for them 24/7. Also, I travelled many places by myself, the catcalling/stalking is scary but that hasn’t deterred me from wanting to travel more places in the future.
I've traveled to many countries alone and as long as you have common sense and trust your instincts, you're generally going to be safe. I even couchsurfed in the Middle East and had an amazing time. Traveling alone is not only empowering but also makes you way more approachable and open to meeting locals or other travelers, rather than just staying inside of your little bubble with your travel companion...and of course, you get to do what you want, when you want. The ONLY thing I don't like about traveling alone is not being able to share food and try more dishes!
I feel like everyone in this comments section are *my people*. I seem to always get weird comments when I tell people I travel solo or stay in hostels. I love it, it’s my favorite thing to do.
I’m currently in Mexico and I’ve been here alone for 3 months. Because I am alone I approach people and I’m more friendly and open. This has fortunately gained me new friends in every city I’ve travelled to. I encourage solo travel because it teaches you so much about yourself.
Lol so I was going in our neighbor country where people are talking the same language as me but I still got a ton of questions and concerned looks from everyone about my solo vacation. 🤦🏼♀️
Personally I love going to the movies by myself and I love going out to eat by myself. I'm a middle-aged woman and I guess what I'm trying to say is I Feel Complete. If I choose to have someone next to me to do something I'm okay with that but I'm also okay being alone
The worst thing about traveling alone, when it's a transatlantic flight: You will ALWAYS be asked by a flight attendant to move, so that two people who waited until the last minute to book the flight can sit together. In fact, it's not just that they'll always ask you to move. Most of the time they'll want you to move more than once. It doesn't matter that you booked way early to get that window seat, or wherever you wanted to sit. You don't matter, because you're alone.
@@RenataKleinRK And someone will continue to hound you, often loudly in a voice directed to everyone around you. I've had that happen to me. On one occasion, a jerk in the row in front of me announced loudly "I"VE GOT THIS" after I said no, and then proceeded to harass me for quite some time.
It's not just traveling for fun either...I was asked to work at a sister store 4 hours away from where I lived and worked and the ENTIRE time men from both my home store and the store I was helping asked me, "Why are you here working alone without your husband?" Looking back on it now, I should've reported every single guy who said that to HR cause that was the most uncomfortable experience of my life. I was asked to help out, why was I being judged? And I wasn't the only girl either! There was one other girl but I don't think they talked to her as openly as they did to me. She was actually so scared of the temporary transfer she almost walked out cause the job was too demanding and she told me later that if I wasn't there she would've left the first day cause she couldn't handle the stress.
I travel alone often. There's been a lot of times people have creeped me out and I pretended to not be alone. Like saying I'm meeting up with friends/family shortly and they're expecting me. They're not, I just don't trust weirdos.
I LOVE going places with my husband we do most things together BUT I would never questions or voice concern if someone wants to go somewhere alone!! We both have our own hobbies he has sometimes gone away camping with his friends to somewhere I wasn't interested in, im not gonna tag along and be a buzz kill who cares you will see them after!
I love being alone as well! Like I remember my family being so disappointed when they came to know I went to the movies alone. And my mom thinks I don't have friends because I can hangout anywhere and don't need to stick with somebody to go somewhere. I am very clingy with my boyfriend, but we can go about doing our thing. I think Jen is me at my honest, i love being called ma'am rather than a teeny weeny something. Yes, I have had a tough life. Thank you
Really great set. Gave me a chuckle while doing some Spring cleaning. ^_^ Me: Travelled to Florida on my own for a fortnight holiday when I was 20, travelled to France and Germany that year to meet up with university friends. Then moved to live and work in central China a month after my 22nd birthday. Completely alone. Spent 3 years there, commuting 4 hours each week to the university I worked at some of the time and back to my regular place of work. Travelled home to Ireland every summer. Again alone. Majority of the time I was completely alone when travelling. Nothing awful happened beyond being ripped off once or twice. My bad experience happened with someone I knew in a familiar place where I thought I was safe, so yeah... Travel alone if you want to, because often it's not strangers or people from countries foreign to you who intend to do you harm.
She is so right, being alone is the best thing ever. I mean being alone and being lonely is not the same thing. And those people who rape women or try to cause any physical harm to any person - they are psychologically unstable, it's all about being a sadist. And the fact is that they can easily find the one who fears. They are not interested in people who doesn't fear them, they won't be able to get satisfaction from the situation, they won't get the right reaction. I don't consider myself ugly and yet I haven't been raped or even harrased in my entire life. Because the only thing that abuser or rapist can get from me is death threat.
El Camino de Santiago is a great solo-travel trip. For those who are afraid of travelling alone, but really want to, I suggest this!! I went with friends but we walked separately during the day and met up at the same hostel at night. I felt very safe. I would love to do this trip again but alone.
The closest thing to traveling alone for me was with a tour group. I met up with them in Italy but I didn’t know anyone and roomed with strangers and during free time I’d walk around the cities alone or with someone from the group, and they were also from all over. Had I gone with someone I knew, I wouldn’t have met so many people and made friends. It was SO scary, I have bad anxiety and I’m a homebody. But once I got there I felt like the best version of myself, I was social and not in my head. I talked with locals with the basic Italian I knew. I felt home traveling on my own which is totally weird to say. But I made plans to move to Italy, it was all coming together, and then the pandemic happened months later so I’m stuck at home dreaming everyday about going back.
Those are all the good points of travelling alone. And sometimes it’s better to take a tour if the language barrier is a problem or you have dangerously bad sense of direction and get lost a lot like me. I have travelled alone in big cities but once there’s no more subway I’m lost quick
I'm 21 and going to a stadium concert on my own this year. My parents treated it completely normally cause they like doing things alone but I've only told one other person and she reacted so shocked so I'm a little reluctant to tell anyone else cause it'll put a dampener on it and I'm so excited to go
Yeah, as a woman who has travelled alone, let me tell you what the locals think: you are here to get laid. And of course, they believe that no means yes. Of course a man traveling alone is just being a man. 🙄
I'm Australian so travelling is a bit different for us. So when I was 22 and had saved up enough money for a trip I took it. In order I flew from Sydney to Miami, to London, Naples, then got the train to Rome, Venice, Verona, Rust in Germany, all the way to Amsterdam, then up to south of Sweden, flew back to London and finally back to Sydney via Hong Kong. Hands down best decision of my life. And I learned so much about the world and also myself, for example, you would have to pay my to go through Germany on public transport and it will be a million dollars to make me change trains in Hamburg!
I went on a trip to China by myself and people were constantly amazed that I was by myself. I honestly didn't think I was doing anything that strange by traveling alone!
Living alone in my early 20s: HUGE scary problem to other people Men when I say im not going out at dark by myself to meet them or do things: also a HUGE ISSUE to them I guess the logic is that I'm not safe in my own apartment building but I should feel completely safe in my high crime city at 11pm by myself...
I just got back from Disney World. It was amazing, and I love my friends, but I often thought "I'd like to come back sometime on my own." Then I can go at my own pace, see whatever I wanted to see, not be waiting outside the bathroom a bunch, and also, go much quicker through the lines in the Single Rider side! (although I will say, we often did the single rider side anyways b/c we basically got on at the same time anyway & much less time in line!)
Fun fact : travelling alone is actually a great experience and only those can understand how it feels who have traveled alone as compared to travelling with your partner.
I recently did a work/leisure trip in Netherlands by myself, leaving my husband at home in the states with my 1.5yo baby. Everyone is fine, the baby still breathing, husband didn’t break down, and I had a lovely time de-stressing from work. That was our deal before giving birth, that we get 1-2 weeks of baby free time every year. This year I chose solo and I plan to give him the same opportunity later in the year.
I go to the movies from time to time, especially when it's something no one else wants to see. I remember I went to see The Lego Movie on my own. I was the only grown-up there without kids. lol But I laughed so much. It was fantastic!
she is extremely correct, the only thing that scares me of doing things alone is the fear of being raped, and not that I look like a loser or that I'm doing this alone
The fear of rape comes with just being a woman not my independent travel. Unfortunately I have been raped by someone I knew in what I thought was the safety of my own house.
Just have a plan and always know your surroundings. Also you can be raped even when traveling with a companion.
@@allwhatilove914 Last semester at uni, I was followed several times while I went through the city. I have been spat on and yelled at. People notice me. The majority don't care about me which is fantastic, but enough men have harassed me in public that I do not feel as free as you suggest I should. My parents did not raise a victim but this society did raise abusers. I hope it is a challenge of language that you come off so harshly dismissive of those who have been abused.
@@allwhatilove914 you really took this way to far way to quick.
There was no need to get down someones throat like that over them admitting they are afraid of something.
That togheter with shoehorning every accomplishment you have into an unrelated youtube comment makes you seem pretty insecure, pathetic and obnoxious.
@@allwhatilove914 I mean I get what you’re saying, but it’s also common sense to be aware of human trafficking/ rape stuff as a woman, especially with solo travel. Women are targeted more then men for human trafficking, and in some countries (not all) tourists are targeted since they are in a new/ unfamiliar place and it’s going to take longer for people to realize you’re missing.
Also, I don’t think she’s necessarily saying she’s constantly leaving in extreme fear or anything like that, just that when she considers traveling alone, or doing things alone, she’s more scared of what might happen to her, rather then being judged for being alone. Which is accurate, you’re more likely to be targeted if you are alone. There’s still a big chance it won’t happen at all, but why risk it? The answer isn’t to not do it of course, but to learning how to safely do solo travel. Since you’ve traveled a lot, these are probably things you don’t think about, since it’s probably common sense to you by now. For someone who has never left the country, or has never been the organizer of a trip like that, it may be more difficult to see the warning signs and travel safely.
It's envy disguised as false concern... People hate when people are having a good time
N it's difficult to dissect that from real concerns
Straight facts
Watching this video just now it's a little bit of both from my perspective. Traveling in groups is much safer and if something bad happens like someone steals your wallet, passport then the group can help you. Also Dang it, I am jealous. I want to go to Italy as well.
Meehhh I’d say no. Cuz being alone and a woman is dangerous. That’s facts and not everyone wants to travel..
@@rosabscura yeah I have seen countless videos of women traveling alone who are attacked and harassed. It’s sad but it is a real issue and traveling alone as a woman is actually very risky. She clearly hasn’t seen Taken haha
Ideal trip: partner goes 3 days early, 3 days later you go, 3 days together, then partner goes, 3 days to do your own thing, 9 days total.
Brilliant
Damn
6 days total per person
That sounds amazing.
Bc Partner can give you advice on stuff to do when you’re on your own.
I travelled in my late teens to early 20's alone and no one batted an eye. But once I got married, people really react to me doing anything alone. I wanted to see Deadpool and my husband didn't have time, I went without him. People acted like I was the weirdest woman alive but I got to enjoy the movie on the big screen. I joined an archaeology expedition in Georgia in Eastern Europe (with Americans and Georgians) and I got questioned about it a lot by people here. But when I got to Georgia, the Georgian men were baffled. Georgian women were amused and supportive but the Georgian men kept telling me that they would 'never let their wife' do that. As if it were up to my husband whether I go? And he was supportive and so were our kids. I gave them daily updates and skyped what we were doing.
People are weird about being alone. I'm happy alone and I'm happy with other people.
How do you join an archeology expedition? I've always wanted to do this!
Like Steph, I would also like to know how to join an archeology expedition! xD On a side note, I hate what u had to go through with those who have such closed minds.
I’m so glad that i saw your comment! I am in that same boat! In a happy relationship but sometimes miss very much having my alone time and trying new things on my own. I feel guilty that my partner doesn’t always have the money or time to go- going on a trip alone I would feel bad that I get the privilege to do things he can’t. And he tells me to not even worry and go enjoy myself! We have taken trips together, but sometimes I just don’t want to have to wait or miss opportunities because he can’t. I’m sure I’ll get mean comments or tons of questions, but now I feel more confident that it’s not wrong, I’m not mean and I’m not the only one that does it!! ❤️
Georgian culture is strong in that regard of "male leadership" in families heh. It's quite antiquated at best but that sort of thinking is still kicking even in modern society.
Yeah they expect you to be joined at the hip to your husband forever. No self anymore.
My husband works with Doctors Without Borders and he works in literal war zones for many months at a time and people ask me, “are you going to go visit him?” And I’m like “You mean, am I going to go take my holiday to a place where I’ll have to stay in a safe room and risk getting cholera? Nah.” Then they’re like, “so you’re not gonna see him for six months?” And I’m like “yah, that’s how this thing works.” It blows their minds.
You have an interesting circle of people. Most people i know and have talked to would probably say why don't you tell your husband to stop going into war zones.
But how do you hug
@Allison Hunter how do u hug in da adult wae
Like being a military wife. Other people can't wrap their minds around 6 mos or more absence.
@Allison Hunter i did.
I don’t travel with people because they have expectations of what to do, and then you feel bad when you don’t go do what they want. And I always feel like I have to entertain them or else I look like I’m boring, it’s way too much stress. Also I don’t live in fear, and solo trips I can take in the culture and everything around me at my own pace :)
Yep. Travelling solo is the best way to explore.
I feel the same about relationship... ;-)
The trips i take with friends or family, we plan around our preferred sites or group activities, so everyone gets to do something they want. Then we all have a few days to explore solo or in 2s. Like my dad does street photography so he'll sometimes just wander on his own and we all meet up at a specific time.
If i need to travel with a group it's soooo important we all have the same mindset. Travelling solo is fun cuz you're free to make decisions alone without having to consider other opinions haha
@@mmmgoes Although when things go bad like the airport loses your luggage or that time when a taxi driver stole my passport and all my cash, being in a group certainly helps. Sometimes local law enforcement is dependable, usually not.
@@alaljarensi6990 that's a good point. It can be very stressful if you have to figure out everything yourself and you lose your phone or passport
This woman is a great comedian but an even better psychologist. She is so right.
4 minutes ago I discovered this woman exists and she's already one of my favourite comedians.
SAME LMAO-
Same! ❤❤❤👑👑👑
same
I first saw her on Chelsea Lately.
She is good. Watch Liz Miele and tell me what you think.
I was so impressed with myself when I traveled alone one summer to the Canary Islands and everyone would ask who I’m going with and I swear with envy people would judge me for it and then I realized they resent my free spirit because up to then I never thought it was such a big deal. I rented my own car for the first time in a foreign country and navigated the mountainous terrain with the locals honking at me to move faster which after a couple hours I caught up. I never felt so badass and adventurous as I did that trip.
You learn a lot from doing such things. And it's fun! It's good you don't let others hold you down. :)
I only did a solo driving trip to Vermont but it was still so great and exciting to be exploring all on my own :)
I know that this things can happen anywhere anytime , BUT as a Spaniard let me tell you that Spain is far less dangerous than US or other countries so you can't compare ( with this I'm not saying that It can't happen, just is less probable)
@@isabelantolin8339 Maria L merely stated that, even though people advised against it, she took the step to go abroad, see other places, do everything on her own. It made her feel good about herself. I don't see her say anything about Spain being dangerous. :)
I love this!!!! Work taught me to navigate traveling alone... i usually would have 3 days before a conference or something , so would have sometime on my hands... and explore the country 💃🏾
I have become convinced that people teach women to be scared so that they can control us. Not that we don't face real threats, but like nobody ever freaks out when you tell them you're dating even though more women are hurt by domestic partners than are hurt while travelling (percentage wise). They want to keep us within their sphere of influence and limit our experiences, not protect us. So then you have to ask yourself: why? How do they benefit?
You can lose the "I have become convinced that" part. It's real
The female body is a battleground
You need it for the reproduction, it's a resource
I have no fear. I am a woman and I like going outside in the dark, I like being alone there where I want to be. I was never raped.
And if thing happen then things will happen. Why should I keep myelf inside when I like to be outside?
You're not wrong.
Totally conforms to my impression that people in their 20s, early 30s sometimes, are pathologically afraid of ... the world, the existential nature injustice even, and allow that to restrict how they think of themselves and to assume that they have been born into a hostile world where the best option is safeguarding, not exploring. To me it seems that sometimes, this existential fear is anthropomorphized as rapists, sometimes as the capital, sometimes as professors. So my honest advice is: please, don't get distracted by the commonplace assumption that this affects women any more than men. In my comparably substantial experience, this is incorrect. I had more students I supervised calling me late at night because of an general, existential panic attack (unrelated to any event) than students asking for hints on exam problems by mail. The female students voiced different concerns than men: Typical male: "I am not capable of becoming competent in *anything* meaningful at, I can never have a wife and kids the kind of whimp I am". Typical female: "I can never become such a beautiful, tough, loving person as my mother is, and never become a women someone like my father would fall in love with."
Yes, the vast majority said they had loving, perfect parents who would never do them any harm. Their perception of oneself in a hostile world is exactly like from young people with a long history of abuse, and I find this highly alerting as nobody seems to notice. I hope you can find the energy to question and overcome your conviction that men are the oppressors and women the oppressed. We are all facing the same world, and with selective / self-affirming perception of the other gender as the root of the problem, we would lose our most essential allies. My wife definitely is mine, since we met at age 17. I hope you can relate, someday.
@@tobiasfuchs7016 I have never read anything more pompous, incorrect, and dumb in my entire life.
I’ve been traveling Asia, Latin America, and Europe full time as a traveler and expat alone for the past 3 years and mostly alone for the previous 13. Still miraculously not yet raped or murdered nor kidnapped by ISIS. It’s better to have a passport full of stamps than a head full of weak people’s fantastical ideas about the dangers of life outside American suburbs. It’s not that there aren’t inherent dangers for female travelers that men would never even consider, but travel isn’t impossible as long as you take precautions. Having a man by your side at all times just requires too much babysitting anyway. Plus I also was in Paris with my now ex-husband! Haha.
Same here. Have traveled to over 100 countries in 20 years of solo female traveling. People who never went out of their state alone is so stupidly afraid of getting raped by anyone like if they were the main target on earth.
We gotta be careful and there are dangers but fear would never stop me to do something I love. WTF is going on with this “main character victim” mentality???
As a black woman from a third world country I find it funny that the same people that call themselves “anti-racist” and “anti-xenophobic” are exactly the same ones that are thinking they will immediately get rap*d as soon as they step out of their countries.
And all the same dangers still exist right here at home too!
In conclusion, don't take your husband to Paris. Apparently XD
@@Sigart Never take your husband to Paris!
Agree! And the funny thing for me, a northen European woman, is that I feel more unsafe about visiting American suburbs than, say, Asia.
When I told everyone at my high school 20 year reunion that I was going to Mexico and staying in hostels by myself for 2 weeks, everyone was like, “Oh yeah, you’re gonna die for sure.” I have gone on solo trips every winter since, and I love it. It changed my life.
The only thing I did not like traveling alone was all the men who assumed that because I was alone I had time for them. No! I’m alone in Paris! For two days! There is a million things I need to see and do before I leave again
Men have certain relationships with women so some of them think women don’t exist outside those relationships
Honestly, solo travel opens so many doors. I went to Dubai for work and met a Pakistani pop star on a desert safari. That wouldn't have happened if I had been traveling with someone else! Anytime I travel with other people, I get stressed about itineraries and trying to make sure everyone is happy. When I'm on my own, I can be a LOT more relaxed and really enjoy the trip.
Very true
I love traveling alone. When I do things with people, I’m always the one compromising, giving in to what they choose to just be agreeable. When I’m spending money on a vacation, I don’t want to compromise. I don’t want to worry about if we have different budgets. I drove up both once with my then boyfriend to eat at a restaurant I ate at in the past when I went alone and always wanted to go back. We got in an argument on the way up. Resolved it. Got all the way up there, then he wanted to eat at a different restaurant. I agreed figuring I’ll just come on my own again sometime. The restaurant he chose was mediocre. And that restaurant I wanted to go to shut down for good not long after. Only person I ever enjoyed traveling with is my son.
I wouldn’t want to compromise or worry about someone else’s budget, either. You’re probably never going to be there again.
I love traveling alone. I love being alone! I raised 4 kids so alone time for like 40 years almost has been rare 😁. I will agree with you though...my youngest son and I are so simpatico we have a great time when we travel together.
I travel to an Asian city pretty much annually. I know a lot of people there. I will occasionally do something with one of them, for a short period of time, own rooms, etc. Any more than that, I'd have a big problem.
Agreed...also enjoy traveling with my only son...
love travelling alone. You get by far the most complete experience and understanding of a place alone, when you're not bringing half your home life with you.
Jen's also right about the dangers though. Not generally more than at home, but at home you know where and when they are, whereas abroad you're just guessing. gotta listen to the locals.
I can relate. I’m still single but love to travel. Being single isn’t going to stop me doing something I enjoy. On top of that I actually like the alone time. I generally enjoy being nature so National parks are often destinations for me. I find being alone in those environments a very spiritual experience. This isn’t easy to say because people can be very judgmental but I actually prefer it to company. I do prefer going into cities with friends or a partner. It’s more fun. Though being alone won’t stop me. And people are very weird about it every time.
And traveling with others can be tough. It’s definitely a relationship barometer. Not even just romantic relationships. Post trip, you might end up realizing you weren’t such good pals with a friend after all.
I travel by myself as well. It’s as if I am a different species to my friends.
Well, I don’t travel bc I have a severe panic disorder and am poor, but if I had a desire to travel, it would definitely be alone. And I still get the “I don’t know how you do that” question from people when I say I haven’t spoken aloud in days, and I’m just like….um, I guess I just like me more than other people? I don’t have an answer for that. My imagination alone is more entertaining than any human I’ve ever met. lol
@@ascent8487 I am no longer friends with someone because of a trip we went on together. Quickly realized how incompatible we were and couldn’t unsee what I saw. Sometimes it’s a great test to travel with someone to see whether your relationship is what you think it is.
@@Sammy-nj3io Truth, that happened to me as well. They say that one of the best indicators of a good relationship are being able to travel together.
I 100% agree with everything she said. Me, my mother and sister all travel independently. I happen to not be in a relationship currently but they are both married and it does not stop them. I also have seen family members who are not “allowed” to travel without their partners. I appreciate the independence my mother instilled in me. Also my father who never told any of us we “could not” travel alone.
Went to Japan for a few weeks by myself and it was hands down the best time of my life
But then Japan is super safe :) I had best time of my life there :D
Japan would be up my speed, with the non-loitering and lack of germspreading. Paradise.
Being alone means you can't disappoint anyone else. can't be late to something when it's just yourself
Glad to know I'm not the only person in the world who prefers my own company more than the company of other people!
I’ll be honest, anyone who can go alone to things is a freaking legend in my eyes.
I’m 16 turning 17, and every time I’m alone I consider how dangerous the people around me are. How close they stand to me, which men (and some women) stare at me for too long, wether or not I’m going to drink ANYTHING that night (water, soda, anything), which people could over power me.
Being alone and a teenage girl sucks. I’m constantly afraid something will happen to me.
Take some self-defense classes if possible! It can help a lot to know how to defend yourself, at any age
@@DeathnoteBB That is the worst advice you can give a woman! It is straight up using women's fear of men for profit, while providing a dangerously inflated sense of safety and ego. 99/100 times an untrained man will beat a trained woman in a fight. If you want to be safe either A: buy a handgun and get a concealed carry permit, or B: get a bottle of bear/pepper spray.
@@TheRealTaco You have a source for that…?
Same here! I’m already 19 but I really relate and I can’t leave the house after dark cause it gives me anxiety. (Even during the day I’ll get anxiety but it’s worse at night). But that’s because I’m afraid of being harassed, this type of rape (where a stranger approaches you in the street) isn’t as common as people make it out to be.
@@TheRealTaco
I don’t think that’s good advice either.
I’m a child, having committed murder or wounding a person (even if it was in self defence) will screw me up.
Guns are a violence I don’t wish to commit to, also it’s not legal in my country to carry guns (or own them without a permit).
And I have actually taken taekwondo lessons which have helped boost my confidence AND increased my muscle/technique. In class I can easily take older boys than myself.
I’d rather give capitalism a hand than do something I will regret 10 out of 10 times.
When I was single and childless I did literally everything alone and loved it. Small town people don't get it. People from big cities think its normal because everyone has their own busy life and schedule.
Has nothing to do with small town. I say this being from a small town and having traveled solo several times.
They don't get it either.
I usually travel alone a couple of times a year. People are always looking at me with confusion, but I love travelling alone. The question most asked is: "Oh, but what about dinner?'
Well, I stole a reply from a Dutch comedian and now I just say: 'I chew it!'
This is the kind of woman with which I could see myself being alone. She says things that are pragmatic and sensible.
Being alone is great, every trip I've ever been on with other people has been annoying because we never want to do the same things at the same time, so one person always ends up unhappy
OMG nailed with the the I'm afraid of men not ISIS.. Hilarious and so many truths in this. I hear it all the time as a solo traveler...
I have gone on many holidays as a single woman and spent a year travelling around the USA. I took trains, planes, busses and it was like there was a light above my head "Single woman, alone!!!" People couldnt cope with the idea that I was doing my own thing and happy with it. I always took my safety seriously and never took risks..have had the best times of my life..
I'm traveling alone right now. I adore it. I get to chose EVERYTHING. It's AWESOME.
EXACTLY! Now it’s literally my job 😂, but even before that, I LOVED going to theme parks by myself!!!! You don’t have to compromise with other people on ANYTHING!!!! Literally just do whatever TF you want!!! It’s GLORIOUS!!! 😍😍😍😍😍
"I'm just busy being afraid of plain old men..." "I'll stop talking about rape when men stop raping..." 👍💪🙏
think you might have both of those statements slightly wrong ........... being afraid of plain old men..... men make up 50% of every person you see, every day. are you afraid of ' every ' man you see? really ? then i would advise you to leave america and move somewhere safe, like europe. . the next one . obvious not every man goes around raping every woman he sees. so we can narrow it down to that small percentage of men who do commit rape. so when your statement is 99% more accurate, i'll agree with you . when your statement includes ME, then i get annoyed. have a nice day.
@@richard6440 Hey Dick, I was quoting a joke, so take a breath alright? I know not all men are bad. But, in all honesty, there are far more bad men than bad women. Just google serial killer or school shooter & let me know how that plays out for you....
Yes, and all women should stop abandoning their newborns in dumpsters.
How does it sounds?
Love this standup! She’s absolutely correct. If I had waited until another person could travel with me, I’d never have been able to travel as much as I have.
How did I not discover her earlier?? I love her humor and personality omg
I experienced the same treatment, everyone was like "I wouldn't go to another country by myself. You are so brave" (that "brave" sounded like they wanted to say "stupid"). It was great, I would recommend to everyone, just carry a pepper spray in your pocket and you are good to go.
Im an introvert and I prefer to travel solo. Whenever I travel, I don't tell anyone until I'm on my way there (cos for some reason, people think it's ok to randomly invite themselves on my holidays).
The people who arent aware that I even went on holiday until I get back annoyingly say things like: "why didn't you tell me?? I swear I would've gone with you". It seems like in their warped minds, they are my only friend in the world and the reason why I went solo is because I couldnt find anyone to go with me 🤔.
I didn't have the heart to tell them that i love them but i can't spend 2 weeks with them on holiday cos they'd get on my nerves, or that I like the freedom of not having to compromise with anyone what I'm doing for the day, or hating the feeling of obligation to speak to them and hang out with them 24/7 for 2 whole weeks". That would drive me crazy! So I just say that I prefer to travel solo (they never understand that though).
I love the freedom of being able to be whomever I want to be and do whatever I want to do on holiday (certain friends tend to stifle aspects of your personality). And it gives you the freedom to meet new and interesting people!
I think I love her. I’m a single, divorced, grown man and I have to listen to this crap every single time I do anything. It’s ridiculous.
I’m surprised it happens to men much. maybe it’s the location.
I interrailed through the Netherlands, France, Italy and Austria when I was 22... Alone... Until my parents thought I might be lonely and decided to spontaniously travel to Italy and surprise me there. Worst. Surprise. Ever!
Seriously, if people want to travel on their own, they usually have a good reason. Maybe they don't like people, maybe they want to immerse themselves in a foreign culture without the distraction of a friend/partner... OR maybe they want to have an adventure without mummy and daddy by their side.
I love my parents, but I still hate that they did that!
Same. I went to Paris with my husband and now he's my ex. She's absolutely right about the movies too. 😁
I've been to NYC a few times by myself to see shows, and people freak out. I'm like people live by themselves there...
No one freaks out in NYC. The whole city is full of people doing what they want when they want
I'm 20 and I plan to go on vacation on my own in summer :)
Have fun!
@@sisuguillam5109 Thank you!! 🤗💕
I always travel and dine and go out alone. I don’t want to spend my entire life missing out on life by waiting for someone who was willing to do this with me. Now, I have the opposite problem. When anyone wants to do anything (anyone, even girlfriends, my brother, my mother), I say, why? Why? Do you want something from me? I’m more uncomfortable now when people want to go with me now.
They freak out even more if you travel alone in a wheelchair.
i like traveling with someone who plans everything (hotel stays, car rental, plane tickets, etc) and I can sit back and enjoy the ride.
I've never traveled alone outside my country, but I've gone to the cinema alone and it's great 🙃 Don't understand why people are afraid of that.
My boyfriend is the best, but a terrible travel companion. Very undecisive, hates rushing literally anywhere even if it includes catching the actual flight. Doesn't like sightseeing and wrongly acts like he's the best at giving map directions.
even the well meaning people are like. Wow, you're so badass. What an inspiration. It'll be good for you to be alone with your thoughts - re-evaluate life. Me: naw, I'm just gonna eat, a lot, walk around a lot, chit chat with some people. I can travel alone without it having to be some Eat Pray Love or Into the Wild thing.
I think they’re just projecting what they would do if they decided to take the leap and travel like you’re doing. As in, they want to reevaluate life
Yeah, not everybody needs to reevaluate life when they travel alone, they probably did it already at home way before traveling, long time ago. LOL
I pity people who are incapable of going on vacation by themselves. Knowing that you are enough is the most inpowering feeling. Also as you go alone, you detach yourself from people’s opinions on you. You get to reinvent yourself and you come home in more harmony with the people you have become since the last vacation. Also it’s so much more affordable, you won’t believe it!
Shiiiiit been a minute since I’ve seen a female comic who can reach across the aisle and call out stupid shit in society, societal expectations, and it’s relatable for guys. Not in the same way but for ppl trying to understand what being a woman is like, she breaks it down in a way that doesn’t make me feel guilty for existing. No fuckin easy task!
That sounds like a YOU problem, not the other comedians. Why feel guilty of you've done nothing wrong
I've traveled alone, including in China. It's exhilarating and i love it. Being absorbed in the experience. Meeting people I would not have otherwise conversed with. Lots of "I'll help you learn Mandarin if you help me learn English."
And not just China! A couple of extra days in Mexico after a wedding. Parts of Europe. In the US, solo camping trips (with dog).
I love my husband and we enjoy road trips together now. But i do miss those aspects of travelling alone.
I'm 22, 156cm, from Germany, travelled alone New Zealand, Singapore, Japan, South Korea and China before. These are all relatively safe countries tho so I did not worry too much. Still, if going alone make sure to read about the does and don'ts for the place you're going to, there's plenty of information on the internet from first hand sources, official websites from your or their government, travel agencies and so on.
Don't arrive at an unknown place when it's dark, remember some street names, sceneries in case you get lost and limit your alcohol intake. These are the 4 things you should always do when travelling, for the rest: Don't be too anxious and enjoy your travel. Confidence will come with time
I encourage couples married and not to have their own rooms and to sometimes go have adventures by themselves it's good for the soul though mix in some adventures together occasionally too
Traveling alone is wonderful!
This lady was on point with everything she was saying. I endorse this message 💯 😂
What a wonderful comedic talent. Never boring.
How can I like this twice? My favorite travels have been by myself, and SO many people don’t get it.
I always travel alone! I love it! Such a bliss!
Doing things alone is underrated.
Loved that!!! She crushed it the entire time-wow. Now I wanna go to Brooklyn for the taping.
I’ve been single my whole life and loved doing things by myself. I never felt lonely tho I was alone, it never made me feel weird like how my friends are all attached to the hip with their partners. I often feel suffocated when men I date tell me they can never be by themselves and that they will NEVER travel alone or do anything by themselves. Just makes me feel like I have to be a caretaker for them 24/7. Also, I travelled many places by myself, the catcalling/stalking is scary but that hasn’t deterred me from wanting to travel more places in the future.
I've traveled to many countries alone and as long as you have common sense and trust your instincts, you're generally going to be safe. I even couchsurfed in the Middle East and had an amazing time. Traveling alone is not only empowering but also makes you way more approachable and open to meeting locals or other travelers, rather than just staying inside of your little bubble with your travel companion...and of course, you get to do what you want, when you want.
The ONLY thing I don't like about traveling alone is not being able to share food and try more dishes!
I feel like everyone in this comments section are *my people*. I seem to always get weird comments when I tell people I travel solo or stay in hostels. I love it, it’s my favorite thing to do.
I’m currently in Mexico and I’ve been here alone for 3 months. Because I am alone I approach people and I’m more friendly and open. This has fortunately gained me new friends in every city I’ve travelled to. I encourage solo travel because it teaches you so much about yourself.
I've been to Italy solo. Best trip of my life! I would do it again in a heartbeat.
Lol so I was going in our neighbor country where people are talking the same language as me but I still got a ton of questions and concerned looks from everyone about my solo vacation. 🤦🏼♀️
Personally I love going to the movies by myself and I love going out to eat by myself. I'm a middle-aged woman and I guess what I'm trying to say is I Feel Complete. If I choose to have someone next to me to do something I'm okay with that but I'm also okay being alone
Someone needs to make Relp, what a great idea!
Traveling alone is the best.
So relatable, I get so sick of people asking where my man is every time I go somewhere.
That look I get when I walk into an expensive restaurant to eat all by myself as a black woman, ugh.
I've always traveled alone and I'm old. Never got much flack about it. Italy was very safe back in the day as was most of Europe.
The worst thing about traveling alone, when it's a transatlantic flight: You will ALWAYS be asked by a flight attendant to move, so that two people who waited until the last minute to book the flight can sit together. In fact, it's not just that they'll always ask you to move. Most of the time they'll want you to move more than once. It doesn't matter that you booked way early to get that window seat, or wherever you wanted to sit. You don't matter, because you're alone.
@@RenataKleinRK And someone will continue to hound you, often loudly in a voice directed to everyone around you. I've had that happen to me. On one occasion, a jerk in the row in front of me announced loudly "I"VE GOT THIS" after I said no, and then proceeded to harass me for quite some time.
It's not just traveling for fun either...I was asked to work at a sister store 4 hours away from where I lived and worked and the ENTIRE time men from both my home store and the store I was helping asked me, "Why are you here working alone without your husband?" Looking back on it now, I should've reported every single guy who said that to HR cause that was the most uncomfortable experience of my life. I was asked to help out, why was I being judged? And I wasn't the only girl either! There was one other girl but I don't think they talked to her as openly as they did to me. She was actually so scared of the temporary transfer she almost walked out cause the job was too demanding and she told me later that if I wasn't there she would've left the first day cause she couldn't handle the stress.
It’s beautiful to embrace our company and being in touch with ourselves 🤍
I travel alone often. There's been a lot of times people have creeped me out and I pretended to not be alone. Like saying I'm meeting up with friends/family shortly and they're expecting me. They're not, I just don't trust weirdos.
Love this. Traveling and doing shit alone is amazing
I LOVE going places with my husband we do most things together BUT I would never questions or voice concern if someone wants to go somewhere alone!! We both have our own hobbies he has sometimes gone away camping with his friends to somewhere I wasn't interested in, im not gonna tag along and be a buzz kill who cares you will see them after!
I love being alone as well! Like I remember my family being so disappointed when they came to know I went to the movies alone. And my mom thinks I don't have friends because I can hangout anywhere and don't need to stick with somebody to go somewhere. I am very clingy with my boyfriend, but we can go about doing our thing. I think Jen is me at my honest, i love being called ma'am rather than a teeny weeny something. Yes, I have had a tough life. Thank you
Really great set. Gave me a chuckle while doing some Spring cleaning. ^_^
Me: Travelled to Florida on my own for a fortnight holiday when I was 20, travelled to France and Germany that year to meet up with university friends. Then moved to live and work in central China a month after my 22nd birthday. Completely alone. Spent 3 years there, commuting 4 hours each week to the university I worked at some of the time and back to my regular place of work. Travelled home to Ireland every summer. Again alone. Majority of the time I was completely alone when travelling. Nothing awful happened beyond being ripped off once or twice. My bad experience happened with someone I knew in a familiar place where I thought I was safe, so yeah... Travel alone if you want to, because often it's not strangers or people from countries foreign to you who intend to do you harm.
Totally, this is an awesome comment
She is so right, being alone is the best thing ever. I mean being alone and being lonely is not the same thing.
And those people who rape women or try to cause any physical harm to any person - they are psychologically unstable, it's all about being a sadist. And the fact is that they can easily find the one who fears. They are not interested in people who doesn't fear them, they won't be able to get satisfaction from the situation, they won't get the right reaction.
I don't consider myself ugly and yet I haven't been raped or even harrased in my entire life. Because the only thing that abuser or rapist can get from me is death threat.
El Camino de Santiago is a great solo-travel trip. For those who are afraid of travelling alone, but really want to, I suggest this!! I went with friends but we walked separately during the day and met up at the same hostel at night. I felt very safe. I would love to do this trip again but alone.
Yep... I remember the conversation: Me - "I'm going to Argentina." Most people - "Oh! Who with?" Me - "By myself." Most people - "ALOOOONE?!?!!"
Loveeee the quickness, wittiness, bluntness no bulllshit delivery reminds me of Joan Rivers. Jen is one of my top comedians now.
The closest thing to traveling alone for me was with a tour group. I met up with them in Italy but I didn’t know anyone and roomed with strangers and during free time I’d walk around the cities alone or with someone from the group, and they were also from all over. Had I gone with someone I knew, I wouldn’t have met so many people and made friends. It was SO scary, I have bad anxiety and I’m a homebody. But once I got there I felt like the best version of myself, I was social and not in my head. I talked with locals with the basic Italian I knew. I felt home traveling on my own which is totally weird to say. But I made plans to move to Italy, it was all coming together, and then the pandemic happened months later so I’m stuck at home dreaming everyday about going back.
Those are all the good points of travelling alone. And sometimes it’s better to take a tour if the language barrier is a problem or you have dangerously bad sense of direction and get lost a lot like me. I have travelled alone in big cities but once there’s no more subway I’m lost quick
I'm 21 and going to a stadium concert on my own this year. My parents treated it completely normally cause they like doing things alone but I've only told one other person and she reacted so shocked so I'm a little reluctant to tell anyone else cause it'll put a dampener on it and I'm so excited to go
I go to movies, the beach, museums, restaurants, and travel alone, and I love it.
Yeah, as a woman who has travelled alone, let me tell you what the locals think: you are here to get laid. And of course, they believe that no means yes. Of course a man traveling alone is just being a man. 🙄
So talented - LOVE her! Thanks for posting
I'm Australian so travelling is a bit different for us. So when I was 22 and had saved up enough money for a trip I took it. In order I flew from Sydney to Miami, to London, Naples, then got the train to Rome, Venice, Verona, Rust in Germany, all the way to Amsterdam, then up to south of Sweden, flew back to London and finally back to Sydney via Hong Kong.
Hands down best decision of my life. And I learned so much about the world and also myself, for example, you would have to pay my to go through Germany on public transport and it will be a million dollars to make me change trains in Hamburg!
Perfect. As someone who constantly travels and goes places alone all the time, I think it's so weird when people freak out.
I went on a trip to China by myself and people were constantly amazed that I was by myself. I honestly didn't think I was doing anything that strange by traveling alone!
Waiters in steak houses freak out when I sit and order alone. So are the ticket sales at the theater.
If you sit at the bar and eat, it’s less weird. Evidently.
Lol where do you live that you have such weird waiters.?
@@ksy4747 Let's just say countries where steak dinners were for special occasions only 😋😋
I've found when i go to fancy restaurants alone they assume i must be a food critic or something and treat me REALLY well.
It’s because they are losing money. They only get so many tables per hour.
Living alone in my early 20s: HUGE scary problem to other people
Men when I say im not going out at dark by myself to meet them or do things: also a HUGE ISSUE to them
I guess the logic is that I'm not safe in my own apartment building but I should feel completely safe in my high crime city at 11pm by myself...
I just got back from Disney World. It was amazing, and I love my friends, but I often thought "I'd like to come back sometime on my own." Then I can go at my own pace, see whatever I wanted to see, not be waiting outside the bathroom a bunch, and also, go much quicker through the lines in the Single Rider side! (although I will say, we often did the single rider side anyways b/c we basically got on at the same time anyway & much less time in line!)
3:17 "Why are you walking on the plane using your legs? God!"
Fun fact : travelling alone is actually a great experience and only those can understand how it feels who have traveled alone as compared to travelling with your partner.
I only travelled with my son when he was little. Now he is grown up and both of us travel alone. Nothing better.
I travel alone in Italy with my small dog. It is the absolute best
I recently did a work/leisure trip in Netherlands by myself, leaving my husband at home in the states with my 1.5yo baby. Everyone is fine, the baby still breathing, husband didn’t break down, and I had a lovely time de-stressing from work. That was our deal before giving birth, that we get 1-2 weeks of baby free time every year. This year I chose solo and I plan to give him the same opportunity later in the year.
I go to the movies from time to time, especially when it's something no one else wants to see. I remember I went to see The Lego Movie on my own. I was the only grown-up there without kids. lol But I laughed so much. It was fantastic!
I envy Jen Kirkman's looks, job, and humor and agree with her outlook on life and people. She's a refreshing and much-needed comedian.
This might be the BEST video on the internet. I love this woman so much!