I’m on my third marriage and we are in it for the long haul. We got together when we were done with our partying days, beaten down by life, and gained maturity with age to understand what loyalty means. We are at ten years now and struggled through some hard times and major disagreements. Only death will separate us. My grandma remarried in her 70s and was with him until the end. Sometimes you just know.
What I’ve heard is that the people who get a divorce, tend to end up having multiple divorces. It could be 2, 3, 5 or more even. This skews the statistic because it’s more to do with that person than it is with marriage as an institution. If that person being unmarry-able or consistently making bad choices in regards to marriage. Although marriage has its problems for sure, and could probably be improved drastically. A lot of archaic traditions exist within the legality of marriage which don’t really apply today like they did in past centuries or even past decades. It would be interesting to see the statistics on marriage success if it were limited to people who never marry, people who marry once in their life, and maybe even people who marry twice. One mistake is understandable and probably common. But normal people who don’t get married 5 times probably learn a lot from that and I’d imagine they find their life partner the next time around. But the real comparison would be how many people who never marry stay together for life vs. how many people marry once and stay together for life.
We guys may not care much about the marriage, but you need to look into this from girls/women perspective because marriage provides them the insurance and stability they mostly want. So, I think it is unfair to any girl just to be with her for years, and worse, don't have any child in the meantime. Besides, relationships have challenges, ups and downs. It is usually not perfect. Marriage serves somehow as the glass of water you just mentioned. It keeps all contained and provide an insurance to get that water from A to B. In that case, it is usually from tap to one's mouth and here it is their life and plans they have for it. This way when they have their ups and downs and their relationship gets shaky, they are kind of stay together (as water stays in the glass) which gives them time to think twice and fix the issues.
Statistics don't apply to individuals. There is a 56% chance that ANY GIVEN MARRPIAGE will end in a divorce, not that a PARTICULAR marriage will end in divorce. The specific marriage in question may have all the hallmarks of success and hence have a higher likelihood of succeeding. Stop applying general statistics to specific situations, you may make couples with a far above average chance of succeeding inaccurately negatively evaluate their relationship's chances, which could in turn lead to poorer relationship outcomes. This is true not just in relationships, but in all areas where general statistics are applied to specific instances. You can't really make a judgement without examining the details of the exact situation.
I mean I’m sure the 44 percent of the married population that ended up getting divorced didn’t think that would happen to them when they got married.. the statistics still apply across the board. I’m sure everyone thought they had all the things to make them seem like they’d last forever, and that’s why they get married. Doesn’t change the fact that 56% divorce so odds are odds
@@PixelPerspectives222 56% got divorced, not 44%. Odds and statistics ONLY APPLY across the board, they do not necessarily apply to a given instance. For example low income is a predictor of divorce, therefore a poorer couple may have a higher than 56% chance of divorce and a wealthier one lower. We are individuals not statistics.
@@chesneytube1 oops I meant 56%. I agree with you to a degree for sure, but the statistic itself still has merit and meaning… we are individuals. And 56% of these individuals get divorced so it still is a valid point.. like a lot of people are low income relative to the cost of living these days which may correlate with divorce, who knows lol. But yes sure if someone is rich etc. maybe they have better odds. But the blanketed statement applies still to society as a whole. Maybe it’s a sad reality but reality isn’t always good.
@@PixelPerspectives222 the thing about income was just one example. My point is that statistics only apply generally, not to specific examples, as there can be many factors influencing events, but people are in the habit of thinking a society-wide statistic applies equally to everyone when it just isn't the case. God and the devil are in the details. I don't think statistics need sticking up for because they have become the norm and the conventional 'wisdom'. What does need to be said is that general statistics are only generally true! They don't necessarily apply to YOU. But people seem to think they do and we come to serve and emulate numbers rather than the other way around. I would like to quote Radiohead in their song "the Numbers": We call upon the people People have this power The numbers don't decide Your system is a lie The river running dry The wings of a butterfly And you may pour us away like soup Like we're pretty broken flowers We'll take back what is ours Take back what is ours
I’m on my third marriage and we are in it for the long haul. We got together when we were done with our partying days, beaten down by life, and gained maturity with age to understand what loyalty means. We are at ten years now and struggled through some hard times and major disagreements. Only death will separate us. My grandma remarried in her 70s and was with him until the end. Sometimes you just know.
What I’ve heard is that the people who get a divorce, tend to end up having multiple divorces. It could be 2, 3, 5 or more even. This skews the statistic because it’s more to do with that person than it is with marriage as an institution. If that person being unmarry-able or consistently making bad choices in regards to marriage. Although marriage has its problems for sure, and could probably be improved drastically. A lot of archaic traditions exist within the legality of marriage which don’t really apply today like they did in past centuries or even past decades.
It would be interesting to see the statistics on marriage success if it were limited to people who never marry, people who marry once in their life, and maybe even people who marry twice. One mistake is understandable and probably common. But normal people who don’t get married 5 times probably learn a lot from that and I’d imagine they find their life partner the next time around. But the real comparison would be how many people who never marry stay together for life vs. how many people marry once and stay together for life.
We guys may not care much about the marriage, but you need to look into this from girls/women perspective because marriage provides them the insurance and stability they mostly want. So, I think it is unfair to any girl just to be with her for years, and worse, don't have any child in the meantime.
Besides, relationships have challenges, ups and downs. It is usually not perfect. Marriage serves somehow as the glass of water you just mentioned. It keeps all contained and provide an insurance to get that water from A to B. In that case, it is usually from tap to one's mouth and here it is their life and plans they have for it. This way when they have their ups and downs and their relationship gets shaky, they are kind of stay together (as water stays in the glass) which gives them time to think twice and fix the issues.
Not if it rhymes with wake and emmaristism
Statistics don't apply to individuals. There is a 56% chance that ANY GIVEN MARRPIAGE will end in a divorce, not that a PARTICULAR marriage will end in divorce. The specific marriage in question may have all the hallmarks of success and hence have a higher likelihood of succeeding. Stop applying general statistics to specific situations, you may make couples with a far above average chance of succeeding inaccurately negatively evaluate their relationship's chances, which could in turn lead to poorer relationship outcomes. This is true not just in relationships, but in all areas where general statistics are applied to specific instances. You can't really make a judgement without examining the details of the exact situation.
I mean I’m sure the 44 percent of the married population that ended up getting divorced didn’t think that would happen to them when they got married.. the statistics still apply across the board. I’m sure everyone thought they had all the things to make them seem like they’d last forever, and that’s why they get married. Doesn’t change the fact that 56% divorce so odds are odds
@@PixelPerspectives222 56% got divorced, not 44%. Odds and statistics ONLY APPLY across the board, they do not necessarily apply to a given instance. For example low income is a predictor of divorce, therefore a poorer couple may have a higher than 56% chance of divorce and a wealthier one lower. We are individuals not statistics.
@@chesneytube1 oops I meant 56%. I agree with you to a degree for sure, but the statistic itself still has merit and meaning… we are individuals. And 56% of these individuals get divorced so it still is a valid point.. like a lot of people are low income relative to the cost of living these days which may correlate with divorce, who knows lol. But yes sure if someone is rich etc. maybe they have better odds. But the blanketed statement applies still to society as a whole. Maybe it’s a sad reality but reality isn’t always good.
@@PixelPerspectives222 the thing about income was just one example. My point is that statistics only apply generally, not to specific examples, as there can be many factors influencing events, but people are in the habit of thinking a society-wide statistic applies equally to everyone when it just isn't the case. God and the devil are in the details. I don't think statistics need sticking up for because they have become the norm and the conventional 'wisdom'. What does need to be said is that general statistics are only generally true! They don't necessarily apply to YOU. But people seem to think they do and we come to serve and emulate numbers rather than the other way around. I would like to quote Radiohead in their song "the Numbers":
We call upon the people
People have this power
The numbers don't decide
Your system is a lie
The river running dry
The wings of a butterfly
And you may pour us away like soup
Like we're pretty broken flowers
We'll take back what is ours
Take back what is ours