Valentine's Day Pick Up Lines
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- Опубликовано: 28 янв 2024
- Sorry the studio is sooooo pink ... it must be that LOVE IS IN THE AIR!
"Toni and Ryan" is a podcast by Toni Lodge and Ryan Jon
Follow us on Instagram - @ToniLodge and @Ryan.Jon
Listen to the Podcast linktr.ee/toniandryan
Join the Facebook group / toniandryanpodcast 
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was laughing my head off until the very end when I realized Ryan STILL CANT TELL a cucumber and zucchini apart!! deep cut throwback but its killed me
Me too whats the diffrence :-:
@@iisoru cucumber is a fruit closely related to melons - so it’s mostly water.
A zucchini is a squash, so it’s a small pumpkin. They look similar but are completely different in taste and texture. Plus zucchini can also be yellow bc they’re squash. A zucchini you can eat raw or roast and sauté etc - a cucumber would turn into a mushy gloopy puddle. Plus a zucchini has a distinct cap/stem on one end, like a pumpkin stem. Cucumbers are just a cylinder
@@soul_asmr damn, we boiled cucumber at the house party once... it didn't turn into a puddle but it was so disgusting and for some reason smelled nasty
Tried using some of these pickup lines on my wife. She rolled her eyes. Looks like I’ll be needing that microwave for one cookbook soon 😂😂
MICROWAVE FOR ONE
There's nothing like a good old Aussie accent in the morning 🥳
My Alexa has an Aussie accent she's darling ❤️
The world is SO much funnier with Toni & Ryan 😂😂😂
Much love from the Netherlands 🇳🇱 ❤️
God I love their humor and how they're always on the same page😂 their laughing is hysterical too 😂 I need friends like these 😭❤️😂
When Toni goes supersonic 😂😂😂
I actually adore you guys, even on my worst days you make me smile.
“Do you know Madeline” sent me 😂
My dad would always claim his chat up line was “you don’t sweat much for a fat lassie” but considering mum didn’t just punch him and walk away I’m calling bullshit on that 😂
Roses are red
Violets are blue
I don't know how to rhyme
Donuts
Sore cheeks from laughing now. Many of those pickup lines are pure gold.
Funniest pair on the internet 😂 always vibe with you both! Keep it up 😊
"We didn't plan that...we didn't plan that" 😂😂😂😂😂
Been stuck in bed in pain for 3 weeks. You've just made today so much better.
Well give the poor girl her lingerie & toys back when you are finished with 'em 🙂
Perfect timing, I was looking for something to listen to, and was about to give up on RUclips and go listen to y'all's podcast instead lmao.
These two are like the older cousins I never had. Especially when they do videos like these...I can't with them sometimes 🤣
Roses are red, that much is true.
But violets are violet, and not fucking blue.
never heard that one, nice
memo to myself: don't watch toni & ryan when you just ate breakfast. i laughed so hard my belly started hurting hahahha
This match made of the prefect BFFs really makes me believe there is a higher power. ❤
My friend Katarina wanted to ask out our other friend Bella and i told her to say this because she was really nervous. "Are you Skittles? Because I wanna taste your rainbow." She actually did it and now they are engaged 3 years later.
Happy Valentines 💝 Toni and Ryan. Thank you for all the laughs. I love you both.
“I’m allowed to say it, it’s my old house” is so fcking funny, I can’t explain it.
I've watched your shorts for a couple years... I'm finally watching a full video
yall give me so much joy
I can not get enough of you guys! Id watch you guys talk about anything. I wish I could watch your full podcasts
You know they're free to watch on Spotify right?
@@hollycumming I just started listening to them on spotify. There are some videos but mostly audio.
My small town Walmart once has a Valentine's gift table set up to make personalized balloons filled with treats. They had Bang energy drinks set up as a gift choice.. wanna Bang for Valentine's? 😂
better than any pods they’ve got here in the states🤣🤣 Subbed, Notied, and liking everything that comes out henceforth
Listening while I cook breakfast for my children. Had to turn it down so fast and pop in my earbuds 🤣
Madda Daddy 🤣🤣🤣... that'll do me!
You guys are awesome .. also Toni , I love your shirt !
Thats a "matter-daddy."
Def gonna use that one!😊
My love confession to you:
How do I describe it.. it's like you reminded my body how wonderful it is to laugh hard on little things. I found you a few days ago and sincr than I am laughing so much more than the last month. You are fckn amazing!!!❤
You two are killing me 😂
The wheeze laugh kills
Omg because you'll be coming at midnight. That was perfect. Hahahaha.
“Not to yack anyone’s yum” bahahahahaha!!!! My new favourite saying 😂😂😂
Hey Toni & Ryan 🌹🌻🍃Cracking up at the Pick up lines 🤣Mate🌈🌴☀️🌊🌺✌️💚😎
I love u guys!!!!
If it was a soft taco, would it be called "Labia tacora"?
Love you so much!
Love the pick-up lines 😆 random side thought about vibrators: does anyone actually use all those 41 different vibrating patterns/speeds combinations? Because I'm willing to bet there's maybe a couple "that's my speed" and the rest are an absolute waste and a pain in the butt (no pun intended) to cycle through to get back to the right one lol (must've been engineered by a guy am I right? 😂)
No fr, they really should have them as separate buttons you can pick from instead of a cycle, bc it can really kill the moment trying to find the “right one” 😂
@deltaloraine mine has buttons to control the speed, pulse and thrust speed.
I’ll be using that book.
I just love you two and I love your relationship
Some of these had me laughing but when you guys did the "roses are red;" bits, I couldn't help but think of one of my own, except it's A, not sexy and B, I can't take credit for it sadly. 'Roses are red, that is their hue, but violets are purple, not fucking blue". AT ANY RATE I've been binge watching for the last day or so and so far haven't been disappointed once! Laughs and love from Maine, US
I laughed harder than I shud have at the matter daddy 😂
Excited to be here so early for a hilarious cheesy episode
Unrelated but did you know Madeline was never an orphan, found that out the other day and my mind is still blown.
8:21 I CAN'T 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Happy❤V❤Day!✨🫶✨
God I love this chamnel😂
5:53 you had me at pizza tbf
This was so cringe, and I love it!
10:13 .....👀 we actually do make milkshakes in the microwave 😂 ice cream, some milk, microwace for 0:12 to get it a bit softer, stir, and bam, milkshake
Never do a dry taco! Lubrication is everything 😉
i cannot get over their cackling
You should buy the “microwave for one book” and test out the recipes 😂
I just started watching a John Denver video with Cass Elliot, I was hey that lady looks familiar, then I realized I was thinking of Toni...
I was shocked to see the "share the love with your dad". Nakumatt is a Kenyan supermarket chain that went out of business some years back. Now imagine how much worse, standing with your strict African parents at the check out and the sign is in your face and you all have to pretend not to see it.
I am sure it was moved from another aisle for the laffs but that sure would not help if you were walking by with your parents.
MUM! A NEW TARP VIDEO DROPPED!
Tarrrrrrrr-ccccoooo 😂😂😂😂❤
well if you need it, you have a coin... that's commitment :D
And the pancakes on the microwave book
I love yall, you are hilarious.
Can anyone answer if they are together, or just really great friends? I thought another video referred to other significant others, but I don't know for sure. Thanks to anyone who answers 😂❤❤
They are both married to other people.
@heatherdavis7397 ok thank you! ❤️
Ryan is actually the only married one! To a woman named Brigitte. Toni is in a 9-year relationship with a dude named Alex (goes by Taubs on the pod)
Facebook had a Father's Day ad for fleshlights.
Best I’ve heard was: Happy Alentine’s Day!
I’ll give you the V later!
🤣
Roses are red
True love is rare
Booty, booty, booty, booty
Rockin' everywhere
my birthday is literally 2 days after v day
lmao
Roses are red, violets are blue
I'm schizophrenic and so am i
Thats not how schizophrenia works, that's MPD.
Schizophrenia- Confused thinking, unusual beliefs
Also.... just a joke ya miserable ............
is there a video version of the podcast or is it audio only?
Only on Fridays you can WATCH for the podcast on the Spotify App or a Smart TV
Find the pod. Daily & worth the listen EVERY. DAY!
Simply awful! LMAO xoxox
Do you know Madeline....lmao, omg!
That orphanage line was fucking gross, gonna need to remember that
Roses are red
Violets are glorious
Don’t creep up
On Oscar pistorious
😂😂😂🌟
😂😂😂 Valengine
That's nothing. Did anyone see on the top left hand corner, where it says "share the love with your dad". 😂😂😂😂
Madeline was not an orphan!
She was at boarding school
🤣🤣👌🏻👌🏻
PLEASE tell me there will be a reaction to the UK woman falling into her window with her b**bs out!
😂😂😂😂
Hey my name is Faye Michelle- Faye Shelle
Roses are red
the sun gives off heat
If your legs get tired
Use my face as a seat
Do you know Madeline? 😂
Does Ryan wife gets jealeous about this episode and their chemistry?
So are these two together or just really good friends?
The latter
Cutest part is: ruclips.net/user/clipUgkxC5nuj06u3IeDOjCclGlpzoGiFh2Q-sWQ?si=GEl4-PEPoHwBIUTR because of both of their spontaneous adorable faces :)
❤️💜🩷🤍❤️💜🩷🤍
0:53 ok but why is poo censored?
No one addreases the bareback next to the sign
Ryan grew up in an orphanage?
Dammit. 0:55 I hate it when there's too much bleeping to guess what they're actually saying.
You're a couple c'mon
Cash is king, keep using it you know the saying, use it or lose it
Wan is king.
7:01 One of my exes got me this gift because he thought I was flirting with other guys...
FYI: DO NOT let the "face mask gel" get in your eyes, it got in mine and at first it was just tingly but then it started to congeal and IT BURNED LIKE HELL- ex didn't even feel bad, he's like; that's what you get!
It's been years since then and he still tries to talk to me like that shjt didn't happen ntm he's married with kids😒
Madeline isn't in an orphanage... it's a posh boarding school
beeping out the words penis and poo but leave in the words shit and fuck, wtf?
Looks like that Share The Love With Your Dad sign was from a Nigerian supermarket chain. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nakumatt
😂