It’s okay if you’ve changed your focus. If you think “Ah, I want to try casually dating” one day that’s fine, but if the next you say “you know what? I want to be in a committed relationship” then that’s alright too. People change, and change doesn’t necessarily need to happen over time, sometimes it can be within days. You’re growing, learning what you like and don’t like, experiencing different things... go ahead and enjoy the ride. Like you said, if it comes, it comes :-)
“I don’t know when will be the moment I stop documenting my love life... maybe when it actually becomes one?” I hope you find someone special who loves you inside out and most importantly, neverrr feel pressured to post about it :-)
i HATE the talking stage lmao I don't know why it is so boring to me, even when it happens in a friendly situations and not a romantic one 😅 anyways, loved this video! you looked gorgeous xoxo
Nah cuz fr, I despise talking stage, im an anxious person and i cant tell if some one likes me, hates me, dislikes me- and that makes me do anxious 😭😭. I also just hate small talk, idk why i just dont
also, you never know; the person who you’re on a date with might also be an initiator and wants to sit back and see if someone else will be the one to take charge like you were, so 1000% be yourself because you never know!
As someone who is actively sitting on the bench in this whole genZ-dating-thing, I wanna say: it must take so much mental bandwidth and effort like even if I'm in a "talking" stage and have to get ready (literally) to go out, I'd be a puddle of anxiety. Dustin, you really don't give up on your love life and I admire that about you so much.
I've been here for a while, I don't think I've ever commented on any of your videos before but I just want to say you've done soo much progress with being who you are and confidently living your life :)
although I do really relate to your position in friendships as the "initiator", what you said about that role kinda confused me. on the hand, you claim that just being yourself means being that initiator and that it is part of your personality - but on the other hand you say that you don't really have any other choice but to be initiator, because otherwise your friendships would not last, and that it is mentally tiring. I personally believe that being true to yourself should not stress you out or leave you feeling drained - so have you considered that maybe "the initiator" is actually not part of your personality, but a role that was pushed on you? i really related to you saying that you are kind of responsible for initiating everything in your friendships. i, too, had a lot of similarly friendships - which i know realize were really toxic. if you truly enjoy regularly reaching out to your friends (while they don't do the same for you) and proposing dates and plans, that's great! but to me it sounded like you don't really have any other choice but to do so if you want to keep these friends. yes, relationships, no matter what kind, always require effort. but i believe that the effort should be at least a little mutual. i totally don't mean to psychoanalyze you and i'm sure you know yourself and your personality better than I do from a couple of videos. from my personal experiences, sometimes it is just easier to let go of a friendship when you are the only one putting effort into it - and you will definitely find people who are also willing to initiate it! i hope you at least kind of get what I'm trying to say and I didn't misread the situation completely. lots of love
Hey Dustin, you're super self reflective (I feel like how you flesh out your thoughts is very similar to mine when you go on a ramble haha) and I think the way you can analyse how you're feeling is a huge strength. Just wanna say its okay to let your emotions just sit and just be aware of what's happening in your head. As much as its uncomfortable to get too excited and withdraw and refrain from acting how you actually feel, I hope you know that its okay for that to happen and try and take it easy on yourself! I'm also the same age as you and I'm literally growing so much. I feel like our generation is constantly thinking way more about themselves and analysing their thoughts more (because of media), and whilst that could be a good thing, dont forget to just go for the experience and remember its not the end if it ends up being disappointing. I think at this age, we are meant to be chaotic in our thoughts and feelings, and ngl idk abt you but sometimes I hate that I still have so much growing to do. Its like I just want to be taken to the stage of my life where I'm definitely happy, and settled down.
these vids are so comfortable to me. I'm a person that struggles and has always fear of relationship, but, at the same time, I want one, so when I see someone having the same thoughts as me I always feel understood :( thank u so much dustin for sharing this
imo what the problem with initiating for you is that people expect and feel entitled to your initiation: they assume you'll do it for them. i think it's important that people recognize that while you're that type of person naturally, you're still performing a kind of emotional labor that they aren't OWED: it's something that they should appreciate or even try to alleviate once in a while. it's like if you're known for being a great listener, so people always ask for you to listen to their problems. you can love your friends, love being there for them, and naturally be inclined to give advice and emotional support, but once people start expecting you to do it and taking it for granted without trying to reciprocate or check in with you while you're doing this for them, of course you'll feel upset. it's not that you don't like it or that's not who you are, it's just that no relationship is a one-way street.
wow. i just came back from a first date and this is what i see. dustin, the things you said are SPOT on to how i've been feeling about dating. we are the same age and i also feel so behind on everything. it feels soooo good to know i am not alone! the touch and attention deprivation thing is So Real and i also find it incredibly hard not to fall too fast HAHA
Dustin, I totally relate to your Instagram rant. I’m a social person but don’t use any social media because I feel like we’d get the wrong perception of each other based on posts and stories, and I’d rather get to know someone in person
This is the first video of yours that I've watched and it's insane how similar our thought processes/thoughts are like you literally speak the thoughts I can't articulate
omg you're so courageous to be dating and going out on all of these dates...i myself am an ambivert so i tend to be shy and introverted when it comes to these things but i'm glad i can live vicariously through you
literally yesterday i was talking to a friend about how i would like to feel a bit intimidated by someone im attracted to, i think its easier to admire someone that way plus its just more exciting and fun and requires u to put in effort that u want to put in ykwim?
I get what you're saying about like initiating being annoying because other people don't do it much. I think what's difficult to realise (and I struggle with it too!) is that you being an initiator is a brilliant quality that you don't find much with others is cause it is rare. Instead of hiding it, which I know you said you're going to be yourself more, there is no need to hide what is essentially one of your many 'green flags' for a relationship if that makes sense. I could be wrong about all this but its just how I see it, it is rare cause its a good quality that others struggle with what must come naturally to you!
Dustin, let me tell you... As somene who has experience dating, IT STILL SUCKS I realized, after ending a 2 year relationship, idk how to talk to people anymore. Idk how to casually date, how to make interesting conversation and even tho i wanna meet new people, I have anxiety, so i get so freaking nervous that I give up on that. I don't even want a serious relationship for now, I'm struggle with my sexuality and i'm 22 years old. I wish all of us luck in this crazy world of romantic relationships haha
Yeah life is hard, I'm like over here watching youtube just to see how others interact with people because honestly I have no idea how one does that... it's a long way to go but all we can do is keep going so yeah
That rule about dating multiple people to appreciate one was made up by straight men who never wanted to commit to a single person in the first place :(. It is okay to just date one person at a time. In fact, I encourage it. You know what you like and dislike in a human, you don't need to compare and contrast other partners to know if the one you're seeing is right for you, just go with your gut feeling. Good luck on future dates if you have them! This person sounds great so far!
i think it’s more if you’re casually dating and not in the committing stage of a relationship. if you put all your eggs in one basket you might get disappointed !!
Ok maybe the end was not Perfect but you're obviously making progress here.It's really a journey . And THE FLOWERSSS (hopeless romantic community knows)
If you are not where you wanna be, then why chilling out so much? Be selfish with you, be unavailable to toxic people, be productive, be money motivated, future-oriented, be independent, be goal-getting and be lowkey. Work hard, it's worth it.
I have never related to a video more I think. I’m also this “new” casual dater and feel like I’ve had no experiences so I’m literally struggling the way you are Dustin. We’ll get thru it 😭💕
I can relate to you dustin on being an initiator ingeneral. It's really unique and beautiful finding a person who's also an initiator. I definitely also see it as a green flag!🙌🏻🙌🏻 It can be exhausting sometimes being that person all the time so it's nice wanting someone to be the initiator for you for atleast once it's not bad at all!!
I was struggling with what I should do about this person I started talking to, like if I should initiate more or just give up completely and this video was the advice I needed
This was really nice and relaxing. I enjoyed listening (and semi-watching) this as I got ready for my own social event (not a date). Also, is that a Matthew Sorgie print I see 4:08?
i'm so like you in this matter. its so hard watching everyone having a love life while your stuck. and i'll take anything, casual, long term, wathever. i just want something, and nothing comes. its too anoying
oooh my fucking god. being the initiator is the best (bc you feel like you're in charge of your life), but it's also the absolute worst when you feel like you have to make something happen, otherwise- nothing would happen at all. I HATE THAAT!
sir, is there a chance of you stell my personality, or is it me the one who stole?!? btw thanks for sharing your 'documentery' w us, it's a comfort zone place. and thank for great conversesions!! have a nice day, peace.
14:40 i really hate giving my socials out to new people. like all my old high school friends know about my youtube and instagram and stuff, but new people its like eeeeeeekkkkkk not really. dont wanna do that!!!
This is the most relatable video I've ever seen, all the vid I was like "yeah exactly!!!!" "sameee" "yeah that's right" "I feel the same" with a bit frustrated tone lmao I love this
It’s okay if you’ve changed your focus. If you think “Ah, I want to try casually dating” one day that’s fine, but if the next you say “you know what? I want to be in a committed relationship” then that’s alright too. People change, and change doesn’t necessarily need to happen over time, sometimes it can be within days. You’re growing, learning what you like and don’t like, experiencing different things... go ahead and enjoy the ride. Like you said, if it comes, it comes :-)
agreed also cute pfp lol
@@rosefawn444 ARMY! :D
we love a vminnie who gives good advice and comfort
@@ale-dl2tl 🥹 you’re so kind like Yoongi
I'm yer 1k like
Dustin: they brought me flowers and introduced me to all their friends
Me: !!!!! 💗💞💖
Dustin: and I never saw them again .
LOLLL
noooo it was going so great :((( i was rooting for them, WE WERE ALL ROOTING FOR THEM
we really were!! 😩
wait who?? did i miss something :((
he talks about it around 17 minutes into the video.. The 2nd date didn't go really well :(
@@emyarla 17:23
bro fr 🙁🙁🙁
When you predicted what was gonna happen kinda broke my heart i really thought we're gonna have a part 2 of this video 😭
I KNOWW
NO SAME why am i so invested in this
I wonder if he go on a date with a girl or a guy but Dustin is so cute I enjoy his videos (^_^)
FEELS LIKE IM HELPING MY FRIEND GET READY FOR A DATE, LOVE THE VIBES
“I don’t know when will be the moment I stop documenting my love life... maybe when it actually becomes one?” I hope you find someone special who loves you inside out and most importantly, neverrr feel pressured to post about it :-)
i have said it before, i will say it again: i feel like we're the SAME PERSON!! thank you so much for being so open and sharing your thoughts dustin
u never have to worry about oversharing cuz that is literally all i do on this channel
i HATE the talking stage lmao I don't know why it is so boring to me, even when it happens in a friendly situations and not a romantic one 😅 anyways, loved this video! you looked gorgeous xoxo
same!! the small talk and me regurgitating everything i tell people about school, life and work LOL
Nah cuz fr, I despise talking stage, im an anxious person and i cant tell if some one likes me, hates me, dislikes me- and that makes me do anxious 😭😭. I also just hate small talk, idk why i just dont
also, you never know; the person who you’re on a date with might also be an initiator and wants to sit back and see if someone else will be the one to take charge like you were, so 1000% be yourself because you never know!
*GASP* literally got so giddy at the title !! Go Dustin
This comment is LITERALLY MEEE 🤣🤣
As someone who is actively sitting on the bench in this whole genZ-dating-thing, I wanna say: it must take so much mental bandwidth and effort like even if I'm in a "talking" stage and have to get ready (literally) to go out, I'd be a puddle of anxiety. Dustin, you really don't give up on your love life and I admire that about you so much.
OMG DUSTIN!????? so happy for u bestie, your romance era
mmm wait till u finish the video LOL
I've been here for a while, I don't think I've ever commented on any of your videos before but I just want to say you've done soo much progress with being who you are and confidently living your life :)
everything you talked about I can relate to so much, like where do y'all find people to date ?
no but the way i GASPED when you predicted what was gonna happen I'm so sorry we were rooting for you 😭
YAY the way i jumped STRAIGHT onto this video when i saw the notif and did a silly little dance in my seat. Hoping the date went well!
although I do really relate to your position in friendships as the "initiator", what you said about that role kinda confused me. on the hand, you claim that just being yourself means being that initiator and that it is part of your personality - but on the other hand you say that you don't really have any other choice but to be initiator, because otherwise your friendships would not last, and that it is mentally tiring. I personally believe that being true to yourself should not stress you out or leave you feeling drained - so have you considered that maybe "the initiator" is actually not part of your personality, but a role that was pushed on you? i really related to you saying that you are kind of responsible for initiating everything in your friendships. i, too, had a lot of similarly friendships - which i know realize were really toxic. if you truly enjoy regularly reaching out to your friends (while they don't do the same for you) and proposing dates and plans, that's great! but to me it sounded like you don't really have any other choice but to do so if you want to keep these friends. yes, relationships, no matter what kind, always require effort. but i believe that the effort should be at least a little mutual. i totally don't mean to psychoanalyze you and i'm sure you know yourself and your personality better than I do from a couple of videos. from my personal experiences, sometimes it is just easier to let go of a friendship when you are the only one putting effort into it - and you will definitely find people who are also willing to initiate it! i hope you at least kind of get what I'm trying to say and I didn't misread the situation completely. lots of love
Lmaoo no Dustin everything IS an era! It’s so much more fun than saying “phase”
omg omg omg I can’t express how excited and weirdly emotional this makes me 💗 yay so happy for u
Hey Dustin, you're super self reflective (I feel like how you flesh out your thoughts is very similar to mine when you go on a ramble haha) and I think the way you can analyse how you're feeling is a huge strength. Just wanna say its okay to let your emotions just sit and just be aware of what's happening in your head. As much as its uncomfortable to get too excited and withdraw and refrain from acting how you actually feel, I hope you know that its okay for that to happen and try and take it easy on yourself! I'm also the same age as you and I'm literally growing so much. I feel like our generation is constantly thinking way more about themselves and analysing their thoughts more (because of media), and whilst that could be a good thing, dont forget to just go for the experience and remember its not the end if it ends up being disappointing. I think at this age, we are meant to be chaotic in our thoughts and feelings, and ngl idk abt you but sometimes I hate that I still have so much growing to do. Its like I just want to be taken to the stage of my life where I'm definitely happy, and settled down.
these vids are so comfortable to me. I'm a person that struggles and has always fear of relationship, but, at the same time, I want one, so when I see someone having the same thoughts as me I always feel understood :( thank u so much dustin for sharing this
imo what the problem with initiating for you is that people expect and feel entitled to your initiation: they assume you'll do it for them. i think it's important that people recognize that while you're that type of person naturally, you're still performing a kind of emotional labor that they aren't OWED: it's something that they should appreciate or even try to alleviate once in a while.
it's like if you're known for being a great listener, so people always ask for you to listen to their problems. you can love your friends, love being there for them, and naturally be inclined to give advice and emotional support, but once people start expecting you to do it and taking it for granted without trying to reciprocate or check in with you while you're doing this for them, of course you'll feel upset. it's not that you don't like it or that's not who you are, it's just that no relationship is a one-way street.
your videos make me feel like im talking with someone really close to me, its comfortable
honestly, if there wasn't for initiators i wouldn't go out at all. i know my kind is annoying but I'm very grateful for those who text first
wow. i just came back from a first date and this is what i see. dustin, the things you said are SPOT on to how i've been feeling about dating. we are the same age and i also feel so behind on everything. it feels soooo good to know i am not alone! the touch and attention deprivation thing is So Real and i also find it incredibly hard not to fall too fast HAHA
Dustin, I totally relate to your Instagram rant. I’m a social person but don’t use any social media because I feel like we’d get the wrong perception of each other based on posts and stories, and I’d rather get to know someone in person
it’s always a good day when Dustin posts (especially on your birthday)
Happy birthday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ✨(ﾉﾟ0ﾟ)ﾉ~
Happy birthday 🥳🥳
HAPPY BIRTHDAYYY :D
Happy birthday Leah the swaggiest of them all!!
you are my safe place, hope you're always this happy
Every video you post I can see you grow as a person and I am glad to be part of this adventure with you
aww i hope you’re doing okay
This is the first video of yours that I've watched and it's insane how similar our thought processes/thoughts are like you literally speak the thoughts I can't articulate
Yayayayayay we love to see the beginning of this date era!
Edit 1: ok I will not call it an era
Edit 2: YOOOO FLOWERS
Edit 3: dang.... i..I... dang
felt this
omg you're so courageous to be dating and going out on all of these dates...i myself am an ambivert so i tend to be shy and introverted when it comes to these things but i'm glad i can live vicariously through you
literally yesterday i was talking to a friend about how i would like to feel a bit intimidated by someone im attracted to, i think its easier to admire someone that way plus its just more exciting and fun and requires u to put in effort that u want to put in ykwim?
i felt that caffeine dependent in my soul, especially since i live up the street from a coffee shop and go there every day
I get what you're saying about like initiating being annoying because other people don't do it much. I think what's difficult to realise (and I struggle with it too!) is that you being an initiator is a brilliant quality that you don't find much with others is cause it is rare. Instead of hiding it, which I know you said you're going to be yourself more, there is no need to hide what is essentially one of your many 'green flags' for a relationship if that makes sense. I could be wrong about all this but its just how I see it, it is rare cause its a good quality that others struggle with what must come naturally to you!
Omg so happy for you Dustin!! glad it’s good enough to get a second date 👀👀
Dustin, let me tell you... As somene who has experience dating, IT STILL SUCKS
I realized, after ending a 2 year relationship, idk how to talk to people anymore. Idk how to casually date, how to make interesting conversation and even tho i wanna meet new people, I have anxiety, so i get so freaking nervous that I give up on that.
I don't even want a serious relationship for now, I'm struggle with my sexuality and i'm 22 years old. I wish all of us luck in this crazy world of romantic relationships haha
Yeah life is hard, I'm like over here watching youtube just to see how others interact with people because honestly I have no idea how one does that... it's a long way to go but all we can do is keep going so yeah
Watching Dustin shove his deodorant up his tank top instead of just... using his exposed arm pits had me like ..."🤔"
while editing i was wondering the exact same thing i have no idea why i did that baha
That Taylor swift joke has gotten old. we all need to grow up
btw great hair, my mans✨
That rule about dating multiple people to appreciate one was made up by straight men who never wanted to commit to a single person in the first place :(. It is okay to just date one person at a time. In fact, I encourage it. You know what you like and dislike in a human, you don't need to compare and contrast other partners to know if the one you're seeing is right for you, just go with your gut feeling. Good luck on future dates if you have them! This person sounds great so far!
i think it’s more if you’re casually dating and not in the committing stage of a relationship. if you put all your eggs in one basket you might get disappointed !!
WOOOO I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU OMGGG HOPE YOU HAVE AN AMAZING TIME !!! 🧡💛✨- well hope you HAD since it already happened lmaao
I literally love the vibes of your videos it’s like a FaceTime call but like cooler jaajaahahahah
Dustin I swear we are the same person. literally having all those feelings right now. I feel you my boy, I feel you 😔😔 stay strong
this is so cute, u go dustinnn 🦋🦕
Ok maybe the end was not Perfect but you're obviously making progress here.It's really a journey .
And THE FLOWERSSS (hopeless romantic community knows)
Your GROWING SO FUCKING FAST I WAS HER WHEN YOU HAD 250k now your bout to hit 500k
If you are not where you wanna be, then why chilling out so much? Be selfish with you, be unavailable to toxic people, be productive, be money motivated, future-oriented, be independent, be goal-getting and be lowkey.
Work hard, it's worth it.
casually dating multiple people is so HARD, my brain can't multi-task and giving attention to more than one person is exhausting.
I have never related to a video more I think. I’m also this “new” casual dater and feel like I’ve had no experiences so I’m literally struggling the way you are Dustin. We’ll get thru it 😭💕
I'M CRYING you look both cute and handsome with the trucker hat??
I can relate to you dustin on being an initiator ingeneral. It's really unique and beautiful finding a person who's also an initiator. I definitely also see it as a green flag!🙌🏻🙌🏻 It can be exhausting sometimes being that person all the time so it's nice wanting someone to be the initiator for you for atleast once it's not bad at all!!
NIGHT SHIFT WHILE U WERE SHOWERING love a lucy dacus enjoyer
dustin: *inserts hand beneath the top to apply deo
me: love you're wearing a sleeveless top... •_•
love your vids so much, it feels like we are on facetime !! also the title got me all excited OMG SLAY
Omg dustin I'm so happy for you love you so very much and wish you all the best (灬º‿º灬)♡
i want to know who thought those jeans were jnco’s😭💀
the way i shook my head when u said u were a confident guy before you even said we know that’s not true😭😭😭
U kinda remind me of Not Even Emily
Dustin is Going all in ✨🦋 So proud and happy of you!!! I also get attached too fast feel you 😅✨
HOLD ON?!?? THE VIDEO ENDED??? I WAS LOWKEY WAITING FOR MORE LAMSKKSKD LIKE HIM PICKING OUT AN OUTFIT
I was struggling with what I should do about this person I started talking to, like if I should initiate more or just give up completely and this video was the advice I needed
not you listen to lucy dacus 'night shift', tasteful
This was really nice and relaxing. I enjoyed listening (and semi-watching) this as I got ready for my own social event (not a date). Also, is that a Matthew Sorgie print I see 4:08?
night shift is my fav song ever!!! will scream my heart out to that song anyyytime
did you put ur hands under ur sleveless shirt to apply deodorant???
i'm so like you in this matter. its so hard watching everyone having a love life while your stuck. and i'll take anything, casual, long term, wathever. i just want something, and nothing comes. its too anoying
Currently revising for my chem exam but gotta put the books down for Dustin💖💖
BEST OF LUCK ON YOUR CHEM EXAM HOMIE 🤸‼️
@@embersremembers IT’S TOMORROW AHH THANK YOU💖😭
dustin : the most relatable content creator 😫📢
Yayyyy dustinnnn :)))
why do I feel like this is a crucial moment in history. like this is literally iconic
@1:00 ok but dustin is literally giving off harry potter from the goblet of fire movie with this look
4:53 tell me why that was me when I went on my first date lmaoo
The flowers and everything were so freaking cute...dang
seeing dustin progressing from going on a valentine's day with himself to going on dates is such a great feeling
good for him!
okay, just wanna say. thank u for being so freaking relatable
Pls make a video tutorial on how you style your hair step by step I need to do something with my straight hair :/
i have some tutorials on my tik tok + instagram reels!
18:47 LMAOOO THATS WHAT IM SAYINGG
i see books in your room👀 book recs video maybe? love your vids
the way i screamed when you cut to the part where you were singing night shift while taking a shower 😭
I fuckin love u we're so similar. ALSO THE MIKEY ABD CAVETOWN SONG AT THE END OMFFFF
oooh my fucking god. being the initiator is the best (bc you feel like you're in charge of your life), but it's also the absolute worst when you feel like you have to make something happen, otherwise- nothing would happen at all. I HATE THAAT!
OMG I LOVE NIGHT SHIFT BY LUCY DACUS. Its literally my favourite song!
Dustin just wanted to say you’re really pretty🤲🏻
Omg I’ve been watching your videos and I absolutely relate to EVERYTHING…. Like omg I just found someone who operates the same way I do 🥲🥲😆
I just found you and I love you ❤️
sir, is there a chance of you stell my personality, or is it me the one who stole?!? btw thanks for sharing your 'documentery' w us, it's a comfort zone place. and thank for great conversesions!! have a nice day, peace.
I love all of your outfits !!! Your style is so prettyyyy and you are so sweet and beautifulllll
Moustache will look good on you! I think you should try growing it.👍 You will look more matured.☺️
You should check out Dr. Alexandra Solomon :) her work changed my love life
EXACTLY. Where do they even find multiple people they can casually go on a date with????
But really, where do you find this "multiple people" to try dating?????
omgggg bestieeee???? super happy for you and your romance era
Dustins longer videos>>>
I love this! You're sooo relatable and i love hearing about your experience!
Did you date a guy or girl? Why are you referring them as they
Hey probably doesn't feel comfortable to share it online
14:40 i really hate giving my socials out to new people. like all my old high school friends know about my youtube and instagram and stuff, but new people its like eeeeeeekkkkkk not really. dont wanna do that!!!
You look gorgeous in this video
ur vibes are so comforting oh my
This is the most relatable video I've ever seen, all the vid I was like "yeah exactly!!!!" "sameee" "yeah that's right" "I feel the same" with a bit frustrated tone lmao I love this