My Intense First Therapy Session with my Mom
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- Опубликовано: 29 сен 2024
- Firstable, thank you so much to Beth for the warm guidance on display in this video. My mom and I are truly grateful to have taken our first steps in therapy together. I can’t express what it means to me that my mom agreed to seek help with me. It was scary, sad, extremely painful, but most importantly, healing. And to our Fam who’ve reached out with support over the past weeks: we love you with all our hearts. Thank you for believing in us, hunnay! #Therapy
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Take a deeeeep breath, inhale summa YOU. I'm Jeannie Mai, and, baby, it's time to OWN ur life! Together let's get 💯 about fashion, fitness, finance & everything to crank up ur confidence. Thursdays, with me, 10am PST. Ya ready? #HelloHunnay #JeannieMai
Kin Original Series.
Have you ever gone to therapy with your family?
ive been in and out of therapy myself since i was 12. I had a traumatic childhood and have anxiety & depression & border line personality disorder. So for me i need to learn to cope with all my emotions. As a family we are open with our feelings and solving issues with eachother. My brother and sister see their own therapists dealing with their lives. Therapy is a such a helpful outlet!!!!
No but would love to start
Never went to therapy. But this is an eye opener. Thank you for sharing Jeannie 🤗
Nope. Im trying to suggest my mom to go to therapy for herself, hopefully then we can go together (shes like Mama Mai- doesnt want to spend money lol)
My sister and i want to go to therapy together.
This episode was a lot of unpacking. How ur mom makes u feel, my mom makes me feel. I dont know if we will ever go to therapy and fix our issues. Hopefully we can
I sorta went to a therapy with my mother. Sort of, meaning it was more of like a spiritual therapy because I’m telling you only God could of heeled and fix me and my mothers relationship, haha. It was that bad but I am so thankful for it because now as an adult I get to hug and kiss my mom and be vulnerable with her. It was something I wish I could do as a child but we were both so hot temper so it was crazy. But yeah I am so happy to see you guys took this step and it looks like it’s going in the right direction.
I feel like Mamma Mai needs to first go for therapy on her own, with a Vietnam therapist with whom she can speak her own language with. Because I feel like there's a lot that she needs to unpack, and language (English) is a barrier, so she could be struggling to share her true and deep thoughts/feelings/emotions thoroughly. Having a session where she can open up in her own language could take us a step forward.
That would be Amazing! But I get the feeling it might be hard finding a Vietnamese therapist who is right fit for Mama Mai. I think this is where god comes into the picture because there’s definitely a language barrier for Mamma Mai.
That would be great but honestly she may not go until she sees how this helps in my experience my grandmother would've never just gone to therapy I had to hold her accountable and make her feel like it was for me for her to try it. She still won't go alone but sometimes our sessions are really just her sessions which I'm fine with.
I was thinking the same thing
@@jasminevaliente94 I hear you, but I think if someone just slowly explains to her everything in her own language, the conversation might be slightly different. The expression will be different. Even if it's not with a therapist per say.
I was thinking the same
I’m literally crying - watching the pain in mama Mai and Jeannie just breaks my heart. We all have some pain in our lives, some more than others. But love is the answer and forgiveness is freedom
Same. I was balling
The therapist is doing a good job getting to the heart of things. They are both fighting the past. They think it is about the COVID thing but they are both SUPER triggered. They both need individual counciling on the past trauma and how it shows up in every situation. Good job to Jeannie for seeing that it is a pattern. Thank you both for this! So brave and beautiful.
My heart breaks when Jeannie cries, I love her so much and wish her all the best. Such a beautiful person.
Y’all I’m 12 minutes in and I have been bawling 😭. Thank you Jeannie and Mama Mai for being so transparent. I totally understand just wanting to be heard . You don’t have to agree but at least hear me out. At least try to understand. Whew.... this is definitely stirring in my soul.
It was really emotional for the both of us too 😭
@@HelloHunnay im thankful that you both are being opening to each other ❤️ my mom is no longer here so this is beautiful remember jeannie beans you only have one mom i know its hard when u are mad bc trust me i know just know she will always be there ok love y’all 💛
I hate to see Jeanie cry omg whenever she cries you can just feel the pain coming from her soul. I hope they mend things for themselves as well as Jay loosing his mother.
Now I see why Jeannie doesn’t want to have kids.
I was thinking the same thing...
I just commented this. I think, she thinks she’s passing along a curse.
Honestly! Mama Mai is being extremely ridiculous and I see why Jeannie had to let her go years ago for a long time.
She wants to stop a cycle of abuse and doesn’t want it to repeat if she have kids.
I was thinking the SAME THING 🥺
I feel mama mai still did not get it. She needs to go to individual therapy. Good job to a wonderful repair to your relationship. Love you both..Mama mai and Jeannie!!!
Jeannie you are making such a difference in this world by being so open and honest - I hope you know that being this transparent isn't for nothing 🙌 You are a gift to this world
Lol, I love Mama Mai when she said to the counselor, “are you done?”😂
That’s a clear sign of her rudeness. No respect for anyone. Let the woman talk! She don’t wanna hear nothing but her own voice. Narcissistic behavior.
Rude
Funny enough...her dad broke her down too much..she over-compensates..she's too arrogant and about herself.So she thinks she fixed her personal issues,but it's worse than she thought she was doing.
This so much reminded me of my therapy session with my mom (we're Cambodian Vietnamese, she even calls me kone) I know this wasn't easy and I am so glad you've put it on RUclips Jeannie, and I resonated and it didn't make me feel as if I was alone! As we are still healing.. This seems to be such a common trauma pattern within southeast asian lineages.
Thank you both for your vulnerability.
I have dedicated myself to the practice of responding instead of reacting. So your session resonated with me. I will go through the emotional process with my besties and myself so I can come to the person with whom I am in conflict to talk through my feelings and desired outcome. I can be really hot tempered and I know that behavior does not get me to my desired outcome. It does feel good to explode on those I care about.
When I have to process in the moment, I use my "feeling" words, pauses, and deep breathing to give me time and space to select the most appropriate response. "This is difficult to hear...", "I am really frustrated...", "This is big news and changes things...", "I hear what you are saying and I have a different point of view..."...
There's so much self growth and awareness that you are sharing here. I am engaged and hope that others find value in this episode.
Your Provider is awesome!
This makes me so happy to see mama slowly changing and you can tell she’s trying to be open minded which is usually hard for older people to do since they get so set in their ways.
I’m so happy to see them trying ❤️
This made me cry so hard because of the groundwork that I had to put in with my own mother. We now know our triggers and we will politely tell each other it isn't a good time if we are in a mood. We still disagree and argue every once in awhile but we are quicker to forgive and quicker to laugh at the ridiculousness of our past behaviors. Life is too short to be stressed.
This therapist did an awesome job! Jeannie, thank you for sharing this journey. So many of us go through, or are going through the same thing with both parents. Praying for you and your mom.
Jeannie and Mama Mai i love yall so much and can relate my mom and i clash alot , and I pray yall will get healing.
Thanks for sharing this, Jeannie. I feel like I can relate with this. I feel the same way as you with my own mom - your voice isn’t heard and your feelings don’t matter. One time, I let myself be vulnerable to my mom and I opened up to her with how I felt and the struggles I’ve been through - the depression and worthlessness I dealt with. She immediately shut me down and tried to divert it. I still remember the first thing she said - “no, what you’re saying is not right.” I was so hurt. All I could think about was, “how can you tell me the feelings I have isn’t right? I’m trying to be open to you and you reject my feelings?” I’ve come to realize that I won’t ever get the reconciliation that I want with her and my past. It’s hard, but I’ve grown to just learn to not say certain things to her and to tune some things out that she says.
Jeannie didn't invite her own friends to an engagement party planned for her. But you Mama Mai gets to invite her friends to Jeannie's engagement party? What is the meaning of that? The fact that you are her mother doesn't mean you can do anything to her.
Exactly. Asian moms are so toxic!
They feel so entitled All. The. Time.
Common in Asian families. It’s very cultural and hard to understand lol
My mother wanted to invite people I didn't even know nor have I ever met to my wedding. So I totally understand.
@@octaviacunningham4845 wow. That's wild!
Mama Mi, FORGIVE!!....forgive yourself and LOVE your daughter. And its FREE!!!
Unfortunately there are a lot of moms who truly will never love their daughters due to many reasons.
I think she’s trying but based on her trauma, she never was taught how to love. I’m praying for both of them.
Its always easier said than done
Forgiveness is the best gift ever!
Jeannie is manipulative and toxic
I think that Mama Mai was raised in such a way that her voice was never heard and this has been ingrained in her. It's not that she doesn't want to understand Jennie, she can't. It's the way her mind functions. She also feels like her daughter doesn't understand her. They are both seeking to be understood.
Mama Mai: raised in a culture where emotions are not considered as much. Parents are not supposed to be challenged and certainly not infront of other people.
She feels violated and helpless. She feels bad for not understanding her daughter so well so she blames herself. She feels as though she's a bad person.
Jennie: Has had exposure to other ways of thinking. Her mom's behavior is deeply affecting her coz her mom is the one person she is mostly close to and proud of. She yearns for that validation, understanding and acceptance from her mom. But she is not fully aware that her mom cannot give to her something she doesn't have.
Her mom was never validated or accepted by her parents/father. So all of these are foreign concepts to her.
I feel like both Jennie and Mama Mai need healing. Mama Mai especially.
Sometimes we think the effects of abuse are shortlived but that's not true. Mama Mai is still affected by her past life of abuse.
I appreciate their transparency coz it's also helping us make sense of the things we are also facing
From everything I've seen I read on this topic, you have given the perfect summation in my opinion, this is 💯❤
yes right on!. my parents are vietnamese and as a child I literally always yell b/c I feel like no one is listening. I got that from my dad. asian parents (the older generation) do not know american things aka mental health is important
This is perfection. 15 min in and fully understood that.
Mama Mai doesn't know how express her feelings because growing up she wasn't allowed to, hence, she doesn't allow her daughter to express her feelings also. She is a good woman but she is hurting as much as Jeannie. This world of feelings and affirmations is very new to her.
She feels helpless especially since many people will see this, which completely demolishes her concept of motherhood; being respected, regardless.
And all these comments may be worsening her feelings of helplessness and feeling like a bad person. Coz she doesn't understand this the way we do.
So it's the world against her.
So let's be sensitive to her as much as we are sensitive to Jeannie
Phenomenal analysis indeed.!!
The therapist needs to get ready for a busy year. She’s amazing.
She’s most likely not open to new clients. She’s phenomenal!
Mamma Mai is impossible like got dammit your her mother ... fuuuuuck
In child development, I learned to ask “What made you mad?” Instead of “Why are you mad?”. “Why” makes it feel like the person is accusing me for feeling a certain way. The “What” way is trying to understand my feelings.
I love this!
never thought of it like that.. i always try to be conscious of how I say things when I talk to my toddler, so will keep this in mind.
Wow so insightful I'll keep that in mind thanks ❤🙏
Thank you! I am using this with my husband and kids!!
Yes, that totally makes sense, I will abide to that. Thank U 😊🙏🏼
I kind of wish that Jeannie had found an Asian therapist maybe an even vietnamese one because they could understand the culture better and Mama Mai could even express herself better speaking in vietnamese. Idk. Just my opinion.
Yes! That would have been better. A Vietnamese American who understands the “respect your elders” culture and so that mamma mai could actually say the things she wanted in depth
yes. I so agree with you. This will get lost in translation.
Agreed
You guys are all do correct. Someone who understands the subtle nuances of not only the Asian culture but specifically the Vietnamese culture.
Yes
As African, we can't even say stop when our parents are wrong. Just imagine.
Caribbean parents the same. We have no voice
Hmmm my bible teach me how parents and children should relate to each other. So obviously that is showing us that kids are humans too with feelings periodttt
I hear you sis! I tried it and my mom told me I was becoming Americanized 😂🤣
It's like we have no voice - I'm a grown woman who is still afraid to tell my elders how I feel about their behavior towards me and correct them
Here we are the Russians! Same! Parents are over you..
Mama mai is a good person but needs therapy for herself. She has to heal her trauma. I have faith that she will
True 👍✔
True 👍✔
I learned A LOT with this session... Jeannie is paying the bill for thousands of viewers... I hope there is more therapy sessions 😌❤️🇨🇦
Totally agreed.
Uff
I feel the same way! My mom and I have a similar dynamic. Thank you Jeannie... For sharing with us... For being open and vulnerable. You definitely helped somebody.
Yessss
Couldn't have said it better. I learned so much 💛
This is really hard to watch because I relate wholeheartedly to Jeannie and I can't stop crying. I truly feel every word she says and I wish I had the courage to express that to my dad like she is with Mama Mai. Thank you Jeannie for sharing this ❤
I'm glad that this is relatable to so many of you because it's good to know we're not alone ❤️
@@HelloHunnay I watched this the whole video it's something I needed to see you and Mama Mai squashing the family beef hopefully it's squashed and there won't be anymore fights.
I'm happy for you both, but i cried watching it episode. Mama mai thinks if she pushes jennie away she won't be like her. I felt so 😥 sad she thinks that way.
But I think mama mai u need to deal with what happens to you and your dad too, so u can let go of your hurt and i think your behavior to your daughter / kids will be better too.
@@sharonpdailey4399 see mama mai brought her friends when they weren't welcome. She's a straight up narcissist. I haven't seen this but watch mama mai try and get sympathy. To fool the therapist.
Omg same I was about to ugly cry 😢
I feel like Mama Mai needs to go to therapy on her own, one on one with a counselor/therapist first before trying to go to therapy with her daughter. Based on what I’ve heard, it sounds like she has a lot of deep rooted issues from her past with her father (understandably so), that she can’t seem to let go of. Each time Jeannie tries to explain her feelings, Mama Mai finds a way to make it about herself and focuses solely on how Jeannie made HER feel. She’s not even trying to understand her daughter’s point of view. What’s crazy is, I definitely believe the way Jeannie feels about her voice being unheard and her feelings being uncared about are the same feelings Mama Mai felt growing up with her own abusive father.. there’s so much healing to be done. Praying for the both of you to come out of this stronger and closer with a healthier relationship and a better understanding for one another. 🙏🏼❤️
Sounds a lot like how my mom is too. Though she never talks about her relationship with her own parents. Except from what I can see she and my grandmother are sooooo alike which is why they don’t get along!
Agree with you! My fam too, and it’s crazy how you see kids end up if when they have more than one, there would be one who end up to be exactly like the parent or exactly the opposite, one chooses to not be like the parents in any way possible, and the other can’t help but to become like their parents
I agree!!!!
@@glamuraiteam9851 yes I agree. Trigger is happening in our country literally and that why we are so divided period. People get so trigger and offend bases on past upbringing. That unfortunately carries into current relationships 😕.
If I was Jeannie needs to break completely free from that nut job. She’s not looking for help, she wants the total lime light. Jennie run away and block her, she will not change ever
"Change is a process, not an event " WOW that’s REAL!!!
Unfortunately this type of family dynamic is common in many asian households. There is a level of respect younger individuals must uphold when dealing with their elders. Sadly therapy is still frowned upon by older generations but I do believe that it plays a HUGE role in addressing generational healing. Kudos to you & Mama Mai for being down to undergo therapy!🤍
Agree with you 1000%
Fact 🥲
Not just asians
@@avamiller1245 was gonna say that too. My mom won't even go... My dad was reluctant.
In the African American community as well. Speaking our thoughts and feelings is seen as "talking back".
Now I know why Jeannie doesn’t want kids....she doesn’t want this generational curse to pass down to her children..
She's gone through so much in life I feel like she just wants to protect her from going through it again with her kids or something bad happening to them :( I do believe Jeannie would be an amazing mother if she wanted to have kids eventually
I didnt have kids until I was 28 for that reason 15 years of therapy and she (my mama) was still living in there with every negative thing she ever told me. But, I dont regret my three kids at all. And I tell them all the time if I hurt them with my words...that I am broken and still trying to heal. I always apologize if theybsay I hurt their feelings. I always receive their pain from me even when I cant seem to help myself. All we can do is live every day trying to heal and trying to be better and owning our sh*t with our kids
I had this exact same thought years ago. I hope they heal.
Girl this is a real revelation I never thought of ot
Said the exact same thing previous vid.
This was soooo healthy to do. So proud of you both for showing up
Thank you. I'm really glad we were able to do this too
@@HelloHunnay I'm so happy y'all to went two therapy I'm praying for y'all two
Very healthy!
I feel like they need a therapist who understands the cultural background.
That's actually what I meant to comment too..
Yea. Unfortunately mama Mai is a bi product of her culture and it hurts her relationship with jenanie. Jeannie may have been raised to an extend. Vietnamese but she's also Amerocan. Jeannie identity is Amerocan. And they don't do things like how they do back in Vietnam culture. I hop she can change but...who knows...
Always. I think that’s a key ingredient in any therapy. Unless the therapist is a super human.
Agreed! She doesn’t understand the nuance of the minority culture they come from. Because, the lack of accountability from minority parents to their children is a common thread.
I think they need a therapist that speaks Vietnamese because there’s a clear language barrier and Mama Mai may be able to express herself better in her native language
I think your mom needs a therapist that speaks Vietnamese because that is the language of her heart and culture. For a counselor to be able to communicate with her and her being able to freely express herself will probably assist her in making the connections for her to understand more things.
Definitely a language and cultural barrier
Exactly
Totally agree
For sure. This therapist was great but would have been just amazing mama Mai could be understood and validated, heard and communicated in another level , and the same to Jeannie
I totally agree with you. It's not that Beth isn't great, because she's seems very good at what she does. However, she needs to be able to speak freely and not have to try and translate her feelings.
This therapist came THROUGH, Hunnay! The way she guides through this is amazing 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Beth is AMAZING.
I need this therapist in my life!
My therapist is very similar and she changed my life 🙏💕
my mom and I are finally doing a therapy session soon and im scared of the emotions but this made me feel like we can do it. thanks for sharing jeannie
Good for you!!❤️❤️
good for you, wishing you all of my best wishes :)
From one Gabriella to another, you can do iiit!!!
My mom died and I felt free trauma it's horrible let's do the work I'm a mother now I see my mother in me
Whoa that's so cool (or maybe not when you're in the actual situation haha). Waiting for the day I can do that with family. When they are ready or if that day may even come. Either way, you can do it! Baby steps! The goal is to not run away from our emotions, wanting to do something about it (or sometimes doing nothing in the situation is also doing something).
Avoiding or suppressing our feelings is definitely way worse. In being able to gradually sit in your emotions, eventually being able to accept/tolerate them, it doesn't mean you aren't supposed to get mad or emotional anymore. It's being able to learn not to constantly rely on old habits in the avoiding/suppressing emotions. Though our feelings are fickle and we may fall back on old habits, the strength to face our emotions is a healing experience :) Baby steps as we try to learn this dance
I think Mama Mai needs to realize that statement “you’re not my daughter” holds so much power. Jeannie is an adult and living her life, but she will ALWAYS need her Mama. They both have so much trauma they need to work through separately and then begin to be able to understand why certain things affects them in a certain way. When y’all said “I love you” at the end it made my heart so happy. I praying that through this therapy you guys are able to mend your relationship and work through all your problems and have a better relationship than you had before ♥️
I cringe every time she says it and want to cry. It’s such a hurtful thing to say.
I've heard my parents say that a lot growing up it's like whenever i have an opinion about what they did wrong they would think that i am just being rude. Which i am not. It's just how my parents grew up. It's sad i cannot imagine how their parents treated them growing up.
I don't think she meant it I'm that sense she should have said your a tough strong minded woman who could stand up for yourself even against me
@@autumnloverjenn8859
She said what she said.
She meant what she said.
Her actions are congruent with her words.
I think it would be more helpful to have either a translater or a Vietnamese therapist so that mama mai can actually express herself better. It seems that she cannot really express what she wants to say that is why she might be repeating herself often and not actually understanding the questions.
“You can always cut me off at any time” - I think that line is a breakthrough in of itself. Mama’s reaction to cut ties only worsens Jeannie’s thoughts regarding feeling unimportant and unheard. Knowing someone is willing to leave instead of just validating your right to your own feelings can never give participants in the relationship a sense of stability, comfort, and safety. I love how Mama said “I hear you” near the end. That’s such a great start to breaking the cycle.
It's a first step in the right direction for both of us ❤️
@@HelloHunnay I’m glad and sending both of you only love and positive vibes ❤️
Mama said she's embarrassed. I feel like to her, that is the worst feeling. Shame. Her father shamed her in front of the whole community. Please take into account how she was raised. She doesn't want her daughter to shame her. It makes her feel small, embarrassed. Much love to all. I know it's hard. Breath.
Bingo! Shame is at the root of this entire ordeal
I feel that too.
Yes !
Yes! Feeling shame and small are deep rooted issues
no the root of this is mama mai, DOESNT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR HER ACTIONS, SHE HAS ZERO AWARENESS. it’s like u can’t even get through to her, she’s not even listening to the therapist, she lets her talk then says smthn out of left field again her own feelings. i’m with jeannie 10000% on this. it’s NOT JEANNIES FAULT, her mother doesn’t take accountability for ANYTHING SHE DOES.!!
Oooof.....”She actually didn’t say anything about you.” “Oh....” THAT is the core of this relationship issue. Beth is so good. This is beautiful. Best to you and Mama Mai. The work is starting!! ❤️💔👊🏼
Omg that part got me like oooofff too. And i came to realization that not just Mama Mai, many people and even myself at times we felt so much that we feels like what they SAID is interpreted by us in a different way just because we felt that way. So when Beth was like she didn't say that was like oh shit ya Jennie didn't say that even though that's how Mama Mai felt. I think if anyone could be calm enough to just listen to exactly what someone say instead of feeling attack by interpreting the word differently, then many argument would have not go side ways because when you interprete what someone say differently it just makes the person who interprete it feels very attack
Ooooooooof lol
Jeannie is truly going to be the best mama ever. She will break the cycle. Healthy boundaries makes the best family.
Yes she has so much wisdom to pass down ! I’m so glad she finally said aloud that she wants to be a mommy on her podcast. I almost cried lol
@@raayden6125 She has a ton of person al insight, God Bless her.
@SPOOKY SEASON It’s called Listen Hunnay on Podcasts if you got an IPhone
I agree. And this only the beginning. We have to tear down these patterns in the family.
Only she doesn’t want kids. But I agree.
Jeanie living in a mansion and her mom still saying: 'Therapy cost too much money' is proof that our parents will always gon be cheap 😂
Lmaooo
I wouldn't go either too much lol
Mama Mia is always going to be conscientious about her spending because of where she came from people should be more conscientious about their spending too!! Especially when your not billionaire's. Her daughter is going to possibly be a in the millionaire rank.
i don’t want to spend money for therapy so i will learn real quick 😂💰
😂😂😂
Yes! Change is a process, not an event. Wow just wow. I love that
It is!
Yeah I loved that line too
I feel like momma Mai might need therapy just by herself too... there is a lot going on there ... she needs to heal
Yeah! To my understanding, Mama Mai had a terrible childhood due to her abusive father. However, instead of being victims, she needs to grow and learn from it. Carrying on the same cycle of treating her own kids in a similar way, won't help her heal, it'll only make her even more hurt.
Jeannie is right! She needs to break that cycle so history doesn't repeat itself with future generations. What goes around comes around!
@@amylee8969 yeah you are right... most of us would have just cut ties and moved on.. I like that Jeannie loves her mom so much that she is willing to stay and work things out... after everything that happened... you can see she truly forgave her mom... that’s what true forgiveness looks like
This therapist out here moving mini mountains...
Jeanine feeling these issues from her past having her guards up. That's a stress in itself. I'm glad she recognized she needed help and is actively seeking it. And Mamma Mai noticing there's a trend needing to be stopped. Or a cycle needing to be broken. That's a step up 👍🏾.
It's such a process but we need these type of situations to happen in order for us to grow. How else we gonna learn if there is no conflict? Gotta spark this dialogue. It's very needed. Great session.
I just want to say...not that I'm an expert or this is my experience and I know stuff. I understand the Covid quarantine. But I think the thing that some people forget is that the mental part of this virus is a part of it. I work in long-term care and the mental stress of being cut off from people is way worse than you can imagine when you see it firsthand. So for mama she probably is thinking well these people are here for them I want people here for me. I'm not going anywhere I'm not doing anything. I miss being able to do this that have people that I want to be around be around me for me. I feel like that's what that was yes this is your event but what about me? You have your own life you go do your own thing and I'm just here. I'm not saying it's right I'm just saying I get it. And I also get what she saying she feels like because she is an angry person her being around them at the wedding can become toxic and she doesn't want that. And not to mention not only did she get yelled at in front of people it was specifically THOSE people. S you yell at me in front of the new "mom/girlfriend" and it makes me look bad. Like she's a better mom a better wife/girlfriend or a better person so it wasn't just oh you embarrass me cuz you yelled at me you it was because you yelled at me specifically in front of these people. Had it been the two sons and the neighbor probably wouldn't have been a big deal but because it was those people. And that really hurt her deeper than she would probably let (HER PRIDE) any of them actually know because it results in her dealing with her own feelings of inadequacy which is why she can't just let it go. So rather than having to deal with the embarrassment of that of people looking at her of people talking about her and whispering in the corner and whatever she just doesn't want to be around any of them. But I watched that video again and she did actually say she was wrong for bringing people in whatever so I don't understand why the argument continued I guess we all don't accept apologies unless they're in a form that we expect. If a husband does something wrong and the wife comes home and there's a dozen roses on the table he's apologized but that may not be what she wants maybe she wants him to sit down and look her in her face and say I'm sorry I made the mistake of a b and c I apologize to you for that because that's what she expects.
“Change is a process not an event”
I’m only 7 minutes in but bawling already because that hit very close.
This was another one HARD to watch....but that ONE line...HIT HARD....we don't change over night...
You are not alone😥 This hit really close.
I can’t even express how eye-opening it was to witness this. Jeannie is amazing for being vulnerable, not only about high points in life but also the low ones. These past two episodes has shed light on many important issues that so many people can relate to. In particular, I feel like this is applicable to Asian culture and some of our upbringings. Also, physically showing how therapy can unveil emotions and improve relationships brings light to how amazing therapy can be.
Exactly! Dismantling the taboo around therapy by showing how a real session may look like. Less mystery in the process, more transparency. Hopefully this will encourage more people to seek counseling
Send ALL of us the bill because your entire “fam” just got a free therapy session!
I know right. I learned a lot
Absolutely 😊
Literally 😭
Lol.... for reals
This wasn’t even about Jeannie and Mama Mai at a certain point. I was having my own breakthroughs.
I am right there with you.
Same!
Some people might think Jeannie is just doing these videos to get views and get attention online. While a small part of that may be true (she is a business woman, after all!😉) these videos and showing this family dynamic are obviously helping so many. Anything that gets a thought process or a conversation started to uncover pain is always a good thing.
Yes, so true,
yes me too!
"Change is a process. Not an event" 😳
Take my money💸because I NEEDED to hear that! I made a note and put it on my computer. Thank you for being open ❤️
Yes! I thought the therapist was very skilled!
I wrote it down also lol
This was tense but necessary. Jeanie's feelings trigger Mama Mai's guilty. No one wants to be reminded of the hurt they cause someone everyday. Plus Mama Mai loves to be happy and anything that interrupts that bothers her. So it seems like she will do whatever it takes to stay in her happy place But Mama Mai has a lot of rehealed and unresolved trauma to unpack
Honestly, this is my mum too. She left us for the last 17 years .... she will do what ever it takes to just stay in a happy place - she almost always plays victim and is quite delusional tbh. 🤷🏻♀️😑
@@FarinaMyrtleRenato wow. that is terrible. 17 years is long time. I know people have their reasons, but on the other end of those reasons are hurt people who deserve answers...so sad 😔
I felt it when Jeanie said, people would make her uncomfortable, she’ll speak up and they don’t stop. You’re really feel numb or unheard and it’s a tough feeling to escape.
Same 😔
She Is Miley In Last Song and Papa Leif Hetland's Spiritual Child! #lastsongmovie #ChristopherRobin #WinnieThePooh #GlobalMissionAwareness #PeachtreeGeorgia
The black and Asian community suffer so much with the old way of parenting where kids shut up and parents are more important , and above their children. SMH
True!! I'm African and we are nothing but dogs and parents do/say whatever they want. it's toxic.
Eastern Europeans were this way too when I was growing up. The mentality has since changed but my mom is still old fashioned.
@@maryamadahir1199 just like the Hispanic community.. Really going through this same situation with my own mother.. Hispanic parents feel so entitled to having their grown children just shut up like animals and take orders without taking into consideration any feelings
Agreed respect is forced with fear .
@@teffg.8909 I agree except in my situation it was my dad although I now realize my mom has a lot to do with my traumas as well but mainly my issues stem from my father being Hispanic is no different when it comes to these things😩
God I hate when I try to explain my feelings and all of a sudden those stupid tears take over and I can’t even talk anymore
Ya usually it comes from holding in too much that when you do finally speak out there is just a lot of feelings built up that pours out and it’s hard to stop at that point. Talking about what hurts you at the moment instead of after years or months helps from releasing a tsunami of pent up emotions.
Bottom line as an outsider: Mama Mai needs her own therapy to heal her toxic behavior that has affected her children. In the meantime, she needs to treat her children like the adults they are, which means she doesn’t need to be in their business, she doesn’t need to gauge her being older equates to her being better. And to recognize Jeannie behaves that way cause of her but it’s an excuse to want Jeannie to not be around (wedding etc) so she won’t be like her. The best way is to see changed behavior.
Lastly, they’re both repeating the scenario which includes layers of their issues, but Mama Mai is 100% wrong. She wanted Jeannie to speak up to outsiders, but not to family whose disrespectful. Mama Mai is inconsistent. Mama Mai believes it’s her way or the high way, even if it’s based off her childhood trauma, that’s the reality. I can say this because I have a Mom that behaves this way and I had to separate myself for my own peace of mind and sanity. ❤️
I agree. It was triggering to see how MM expects Jeannie to calmly discuss the issue privately, while openly defying Jeannie's wishes after being asked 3X to not invite randoms. MM wants to be respected, listened to and doted on while not giving the same back, which is extremely selfish, no matter how they want to sugar-coat it. Being better than her father is an accomplishment, but not the yard stick she should be measuring success with.
It’s so interesting how they both excuse actions because of “cultural reasons.” But isn’t that also just how your family raised you? So isn’t it just family pathology? I think Mama Mai needs to let go of some cultural beliefs about superiority based on age. I GUARANTEE that Mama Mai’s father did the same to her and she hated it.
I agreed too.i honestly believe that Mama Mai’s toxic behaviors is deeper than see thinks . She thinks the solution to her stubbornness is just cutting people out of her life. The bad cycle is just going to continue you unless acknowledge & understand it.
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@@xxo8888 Jeannie has tolerated her behavior for too long so blame Jeannie tf
I saw a therapist on my own and she taught me how to talk to my husband using "I" language instead of "You" language. Instead of saying "you did this and you hurt me" you say instead," I felt hurt when.......". It actually worked but you have to work hard at it because it's difficult to do it consistently. It's so easy to fall back into old patterns where you each point out what the other is doing wrong instead of how you actually feel about the situation.
Yes! I used the same approach with my husband and it worked. It stopped the argument/discussion from escalating like it usually would.
as a south asian, this idea of respect with elders in the asian community is so difficult to navigate, i really feel for jeannie ..
The problem with those cultures are the idea that respect is automatically given. Respect is earned imo. I could care less if you're older than me.
Jeanie doesnt trust her mom with her feelings and requires boundaries and a new dynamic because her mom didn’t believe Jeanie when she told her about abuse she suffered when she was young. Her asking for respect from her mom in the way that she has, is what developed from that. Jeanie is protecting herself from ever being hurt and rejected by her mom again.
WHEW this therapist deserves double the hourly rate 😂
Yep she's good!
@@motso5121 just realized you are a South African 🤩
😂😂💕 OKAY for real for real
Yes! She's GOOD!
I loveee good therapist❤️❤️❤️❤️
I'll Take The Holy Spirit! 🕊
Zxc
I want to be one when I grow up I'm 13 now
@@antonialovesyou4462 I agree God is in control of everything and the Holy spirit does guide and help but in thier case this session was much needed.
@@antonialovesyou4462 there is nothing wrong with loving Jesus and having a good therapist. You go to physical health doctors so there is nothing wrong with mental health doctors.
They probably need to address the elephant who is NOT in the room. ie. Mama Mai's father. Mama Mai said that she hates him. She blames him for her temper. She said that she will never talk to him again. Jeannie wants to stop the generational pattern, but a part of the generation is being looked over. If the grandfather is still alive, then the chapter cannot be closed unless they deal with the way they react to him or about him. I think they need to deal with their relationship with him first so that they can move on and deal with theirs. Just an opinion. I am no therapist. I may be wrong.
I do agree that mama needs to forgive. Doesn't mean start taking to him again or forget everything but to let go of those negative feelings because in a way, they consume her.
@@parkerlee3912 I agree that she needs her own trauma therapist to talk about it.
21:40“ she didn’t actually say anything about you” ...silence.... “ oh” shit literally gave me CHILLS
This therapist has helped them immensely. Good job, Beth.
I applaud that you guys publicize this with the intention to start conversations among families that may be experiencing similar issues. It can be really hard to authentically flush out the issues you both have on camera.
Yes. Especially Asian families
Mama Mai said she don’t wanna spend no money on therapy, so she’s gonna change real quick 🤣🤣🤣🤣
That cracked me up 😅😅😅
Mama mai never fail to make me laugh. Love her!
😩😩😂😂
😅😅😅i hollArd🤣🤣
Those of us here berating Mama Mai and saying Jeannie should cut her off should take a second look at what’s happening here. Mama Mai is a broken woman with so many bleeding wounds from her own relationship with her parents. She’s carrying too much baggage and so it’s not that she’s toxic with her daughter. She just can’t give what she doesn’t have. Until she heals from her own situation with her parents, she will never be able to give Jeannie what she’s looking for or need from a mother.
You hit the nail on the head. My parenting wasnt the best because i never healed from my own childhood trauma.
Exactly! As the expression goes, “hurt people hurt people”. And for anyone reading who may not get it... the first hurt is an adjective as in “a hurt person” and the second hurt is a verb as in “hurting people”. A rewrite would be “a hurt person hurts other people”. She never resolved her own shit, never learned the emotional tools to communicate better, and passed all of that down to her own daughter.
Everyone has issues. You don't get to destroy people. Think of it as an addict. You don't let them destroy you. You tell them that the cost of being in your life is to be healthy. You can be compassionate without letting people allow yourself to be dragged down
I totally agree and one thing that should be remembered is Jeanie was afforded advantages her mother did not receive. Someone mentioned Jeanie lives in a mansion and she does but her mother did not at Jeanie's age. Jeanie/Jay can afford therapy her mother always kept it real that she is cheap and I think that stems from her upbring. My mom (rest in peace) was abused as a child and the fact that I worked in a hospital and had the resources my mother did not at my age helped me understand and have compassion for my mom. I pray Jeanie and Momma Mai let God walk with them through this journey. God bless!
@@peachesandpoets 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Omg when mamá Mai was talking i cried how she felt she ruined her daughter with her temper all because of how mama mais father treated her. Our generation can help heal our parents I really feel that, like mama mais just walks around with the trauma and our helps bring awareness and healing it’s so hard I’m glad they’re working together
Wish therapy wasn’t so expensive.
If you think about it, most people will throw their money away for material things. Expensive purses, shoes, clothes, jewelry, cars etc. We invest alot in material things that we THINK will make us happier. But why not invest in something that will actually HELP you. Whether it's acceptance or realization
@@stephaniemacedo4152 it’s not affordable. Therapy is $150/ session. That’s not something most Americans can just pay when they’re living paycheck to paycheck 🤦🏽♀️
@@Sungoddessz Most counties have a mental health department with a sliding scale rate. Sometimes there's also grad school therapist that take on cases and discuss an action plan with long-term professionals as an internship. Those are also sliding scale. Check Psychology Today online for a list of local therapist or contact a nearby university psychology department.
Weekly at $150 -$300 x 4 weeks is between $600 - $1200 monthly... not many people have that much disposable income. 🤷🏾♀️ Even as we age
THIS IS SOMETHING SERIOUS ITS RIDICOULSE HOW EXPENSIVE IT IS FIRST OF ALL IT SHOULDNT COST THIS IS SERIOUS MENTAL HEALTH LEADING TO SUICIDE THATS WHY JESUS DIDNY LIKE THE MOMEY BUISNESS IN JERSLAUM BUT I GUESS YOU KNOW TIMES CHANGED BUT THATS WHY I FACE MEDIATION PEOPPE SLEEP ON IT NOT KNOWING HOW GOOD IT IS AND ITS FREE JESUS DID THAT AND GOD GUID HIM PEOPLE PLEASE DO MEDIATION IF YOU CANT AFFORD PLEASEE MAY GOD BLESS YOU HEAL YOU BLEASING AND LOVE YOUR WAY MAY GOD BLESS YOU😇😇🙏🙏🙏
Girl I’m over here crying just hearing your mom say sorry to you, my mom is the same as your mom and I know it’s rare for their generation to take accountability for their actions
Bless that counselor, at one point she looked like what the heck have I gotten myself into. But brava for yall. Step one is done. 💖
Lol. Yeah she definitely did but she pulled it together again. I see it getting better and better.
@Margaret Kpeh How dare you say this is staged? Is this bizarre? Don't people experience these things in real life? Just because they are open and vulnerable to share it with the public don't mean it's staged. Stop with the conspiracy theory.
@@anndiestephen7671 We won't really know if it's staged, but the effort to edit and layout the video (solo cuts to another person's listening face when someone else is speaking, caption bubbles, etc.) definitely tries to capture an essence of "family drama for TV". It's following the production flow of any E! or Real Housewives product.
Yes, the tears and hate and anger discussed are theirs and we are not denying the validity behind them. But there is an element of awareness that more drama, more raw emotion, means more views. That being said, Jeannie is pretty open and engaging with viewers in her comments and lives, so if sharing her relationship issues on YT is a way to both earn money and shade her story, so be it. All the power to her!
I think it's great she's highlighting the cultural faults in this situation as well, and it's nice to see many young women from multiple backgrounds understand or relate with each other.
Personally, I think the therapist is meh. Her California valley girl accent gets in the way of her trying to sound empathetic even as she slows her words down... If anything she sounds like she's talking to a toddler or is about to read astrology for a $25 Amazon giftcard. That being said, for some people I think you need that level of simplicity to gently mirror and probe that introspection (especially for Mother, in this case). On the Avenue of RUclips, I guess it's the perfect fit.
It's sad because I think the mother has deep rooted problems that have never been resolved and it is why she can't have any other healthy relationships.
At 21:17, Momma Mai's "Oh." at the revelation that Jeannie was talking about her own feelings and not Momma Mai rang through my SOUL!!!! I now realize that I have a problem LISTENING to what people are ACTUALLY saying, as opposed to my interpretation of what I think they said. This will stay with me forever. Jeannie and Momma Mai, thank you for being so transparent. Your willingness to be vulnerable is going to help SO many other people in the world.
Hurt people, hurt people. Mama Mai has to resolve her pain before she can learn to behave differently. Did her father physically abuse her? As I said before, she has a problem with Jeannie's independence...she said it. Praying for you all.
He beat her during his gambling losses. He beat his wife. He hit Mai with a hammer on her leg until she couldn't walk and had to be hospitalized. Also, he told Mai he did not want to see her unless she aborted Jeannie during her pregnancy.
@@georgina4874 wow, yeah that's terrible& it's no wonder why mama mai is so damaged. Abuse takes a toll
I wish they had found an Asian therapist that could maybe relate to the cultural aspect more. And that also could have made it more comfortable for mama Mai too but I think this was a great first step. So proud of you both, you only have one mother and she only has one daughter, so you might as well make the best of it. And that’s what y’all are doing!👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I think an Asian therapist might have justified a lot even though they understood. So it’s best they had an outside source who can see things clearly.
@@KLB1218 from a non-bias human perspective yes I understand that👏🏾
Yasssss
Boundaries and respect aren’t cultural.
@Ryan U are probably right.
I think the therapist did a great job in a difficult situation.
This is literally how most of Vietnamese parents are. Like what Jennie said, if your parents tell you to sit, you can’t be standing up. Your voice is not heard is the biggest issue.... I feel like there is no such thing as parents respecting their children in our culture. My parents are the same way. They think that they’re older and wiser that I need to listen and follow whatever they tell me to do.
Somali/African culture is exactly the same, parents are always right and the children's feelings don't really matter. What they don't know is, this actually disables us growing up and we end up with alot if 'issues'.
Thy- totally agree 100%
My mom is West Indian, it's the same for her too.
It's about the same with Hmong parents as well.
I was also raised this way and I'm Spanish. I'm sorry for what you are going through it is hard to not have any voice
I'm a therapist and it just gives me so much pride in my profession when I see good therapy in action. Wounds begin to heal and hearts begin to open!
Jeanne was getting molested by a family member keeping them while she worked they didn't speak in 8yeas Jeanne told her she didn't believe her iam glad they trying she needs to be at that wedding they got let the past go Jeanne still angry about her childhood she put her through college came to la worked hard I think that's why she didn't want children with Freddie the way she was treated as a child scared she might be like her mother love yall Jeanne and mama I think she think Jeanne going foret about her cause she have j I glad they doing this
Yes 🙌🏾🙌🏾
Wait.. wait ya'll. Did you hear what Jeannie said about what Mama Mai asked her about her abuser? "Why didn't you tell him to stop".. Oh... mama you need to apologize for that. That's one of the worst things you can ask a victim of sexual abuse. It seems like there's many underlying issues that needs to be dealt with, for both sides. This seems like a right first step.
She apologized on another video when they discussed the abuse.
I caught that too!
Mamá mai seems more focused on her feelings than Jeanni’s. Seems to be her pattern😪
So sad hey
She can't see beyond herself at all. She sees everything just in terms of how it affects herself. As a parent of teenagers and adult children, I can't even fathom being so self-centered at the harm to one's children. Children raised this way are known to end up in abusive relationship at a high frequency, which is not surprising because their parent trained them and taught them to bake abuse, which is so sad.
That woman will never change, she’s a narcissist who sees only her ways and she’s nasty
@@freedaspeak1 people can change it just takes more time for her since she has awful traumas and seeked help way later in life
A lot of people are a narcissist and hopefully therapy will bring that out,because they are alway's right about everything.Good luck to both of you and your family Jenni Mai,because this effect them also.❤️💕💞🙏🏾
I love that the therapist kept you on the actual issue. And made sure you both heard each other
Therapy is difficult!! Wanting to make a change in your relationship is what is going to make it successful. This was heartwarming. Thank you both for being so transparent.❤️
And thank you for listening!
All I’m focused on is Jeannie saying “I want kids” and “our kids” 🥺 so happy she stuck to her gut with her decision on when and if to have children
I think she will be a great mom 🙏🏽 Jeezy and Jeannie are prefect for each other ❤️❤️❤️ both are so caring even if they both have tempers ❤️ love them
I think she was actually speaking hypothetically, but she will be a step-mother so maybe in that regard
@@mickey567 she said it on her new Podcast ❤️❤️ she changed her mind and wants to be a mom 😍
@@karynallen-clarke3354 omg wait that’s wonderful ☺️💛 I’m so happy for her, you can she’s happier and healthier in many ways these days that’s amazing!!
@@mickey567 yes when you get a chance listen too it ...I was shocked lol this the 1st time I ever heard her say ...she would love to be a mom ❤️❤️ seems like ...her and jeezy really love each other ...wish them the best
The way mama Mai said “are you finished” to Beth in the beginning 💀💀💀💀 I-
😂😂😂 I was like 🤨she don’t mean no harm😂😂
I cringed.
@@alimahaqq8239 when you say it in Vietnamese, it doesn’t come out the same “tone”. Keep in mind this Is not Mama Mai’s first language. She may not be aware that it came out rude.
Lmao
🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣
"Its not always I'm angry at you or angry at something you did. Its I have anger inside of me and this situation triggered it" woah
This video is really going to help others.
I really hope so! That's why I wanted to share.
@@HelloHunnay helped me realize that not all of us in Vietnamese families will get to have that experience of going to therapy to find healing and peace. I lost my Ongnoi bc they didn’t care about Covid. Had to cut ties due to lack of boundaries and abuse. But it’s really nice to see you and mama Mai doing what a lot of viet families can’t..ending generational trauma. Best of luck to you both. ❤️
Based off of what I saw in the last episode I prejudged and thought “There is no way therapy will get Mama Mai to see the other perspective she clearly is a veryyy stubborn person”. As is my father. But this just showed there is absolutely hope to turn things around for the better! She started with a defensive look and ended with a smile! Gives me hope for my situation thank you 🙏
She still doesn’t get it. I doubt she will change. Even whenever Jeanne cried, she has always seem unmoved & unbothered. I have always found that very cold, and feel sorry for Jeanne.
I don't think she knows any better
i don't think an old person can change tbh
It's culture combined with stubbornness. They expect you to bend to their will at your own expense. My mom's the same way.
Jeannie still hasn’t healed from molestation. I felt like Jeannie still had hidden animosity even before THIS
We also did learn tho that mama mai has animosity towards her as well since she sees herself in her. It's definitely a two way street.
Yes but that didn't have anything to do with the fight...her mother did not respect her wishes...if you tell someone...(even your Mother) 2 to 3 times that something makes you uncomfortable and the person STILL does it...that's called DISRESPECT and DISREGARD for your feelings.....the part about her molestation had nothing to do with this fight...it just came out thru therapy like things always do.
Yes. The last show when she spoke about mama mai not wanting a daughter like her, you could see there is a lot of resentment still. I get her , its the same with my mum. I love her but some days all that her abuse cost me comes back to me.
The molestation plays a role bc the therapist made them realize the background behind their reactions. Jeannie felt like she didn’t have a voice back then and now. And when she spoke on it after her mom told her to speak up she was chastised for it. Molestation plays a role, something was taken from her and Jeannie is fighting to never let that “something” happen again.
@@MinkedLash jeannie has even shared in old episodes that Mama Mai didnt believe her when she was molested and treated her like the adults were the ones telling the truth. It was disrespect her mom didnt listen to her or take her seriously as a kid, and so when her mom doesn’t listen or take her seriously now, it is a deeply rooted trigger attached to her mom not protecting her back then. Im surprised at the people trying to separate the two. That’s a huge wound and talk about forgive but never forget. Her feelings as a child were invalid to the adults back then and OF COURSE they need to be taken as valid for her to have any kind of true relationship with her mom now.
This therapist out here doing the Lord's work! I'm hoping you guys get that breakthrough.
I love Iyanla way of therapy. It's calling ppl out of their comfort zone with tough love. Regular therapy is a bit to laid back for me lol
I was in tears when Mama explained why/how she fights w/Jeanne it's not Jeanne it's Mamas past if she doesn't deal with that she'll have a difficult time redirecting her disappointed/anger/hurt. And that she's blaming herself is heartbreaking, but in that Mama must respect others wishes and boundaries.
Mama Mai, is a Narcissist.
I feel like mama Mai isn’t understanding the concept or questions being asked. Every time Jeannie talks she will interrupt and raise her voice. Mama Mai has so much anger built up.
Like the therapist said to her "change is a process, not an event." She was speaking in regards to Jeannie but it applies to Mama Mai as well. I personally observed anger built up in both of them, but agreeing to therapy and being more open is a great start for them to break those generational issues and move forward.
@@Drea1204 I couldn’t agree more.
Mamma has 60+ years of built up trauma and unregulated emotions. It will take that same amount of years of unlearning for her to truly understand everything tbh
I think mama needs a trauma therapist to talk about all those strong negative emotions about her father.
Jeannie's mom manipulates the situation. Jeannie is no way like her mother was in the past and her mother had not changed, she is still the raging person she was in the past.
Exactly hence she will be alone. No one will marry her. Uncle Ted got trapped. Therapy does not fix you it will only help you if you can submit to the change
@@bbdass4598 She even started the therapy by saying that there is nothing wrong with her, so there is no need for a therapy for her actually. You can see that she does not listen, she does not connect to Jeannie´s feelings, she just waits until she can reply, that she is right and Jeannie is wrong. She seem emotionally underdeveloped as well, she is not able to feel empathy, it is her brain damaged by her childhood. There was no empathy for her from her parents...
I disagree. I think they made good progress in this session and as long as they both continue to build on what they learned... their relationship with each other will improve as well as peripheral relationships as well.
@@TallieRS2378 Agree.
@@Julienna my comment keeps getting deleted as it states the Truth. Jeannie's mum cheated on her dad. She is toxic. There is a video out there. Jeannie and her mum have been using the platform to manipulate and spread toxic feminism due to her selfishness and cunning behaviour.
There is a serious generational gap here showing how things are perceived. The older generation never feels the child has to stand up to the parents
Agree
I think mama Mai is just being a typical strict mom, who doesn't wanna let her guard down to her kids..she's learning 💁 I pray you guys heal..all the way from South Africa 🌹
Agree
Ppl must understand.. Mamma has 60+ years of built up trauma and unregulated emotions. It will take that same amount of years of unlearning for her to truly heal
She has to understand that some people are trying to help her not hurt her. Also she has to want the help and stop fighting it so that she can become better. We know hurt people hurt people but sometimes you do have to pause and catch your breath before reacting and she's not there yet. I always tell people if you have a response to what I said as soon as I finished the statement or question then you didn't take the time to truly hear what I said and to think about your response. You're only trying to get your point out and that's not good communication skills.
@@veronicahill935 yeah.. I’m not disagreeing with you but what I’m saying is it will take A LONG time before she understands that. It takes so much unlearning and active practicing.. this was her first session. Saying “she has to understand ppl are trying to help not hurt”.. is not so easy when someone has used defensive coping mechanisms as a survival for most of their life. She eventually will .. but won’t happen so easily growth is a process
@@Jillydisco love this comment 👏👏! All the folks bashing on mama mai are only projecting their own shit on this video, instead of taking the facts into consideration. The fact is she had to grow up like this to survive and it is very hard to learn to accept help when that's all you know.
She’s only in her 50s
@nunya, people are bashing they are stating their opinions to what they see. You can't make someone see your point of view if it's not theirs. My comment is how I see it irregardless to how someone may view. Offer constructive feedback to someone that may disagree with you so that there can be a constructive conversation. Peace
It’s deeper than that.
1. Mama Mai is an old school parent who wants their l child to speak up against everyone but them.
2. Mama Mai needs to learn that it is not disrespect for your child to call you out on behavior that they don’t like that you did. That parent pride is strong with her. She doesn’t want to be wrong in front of Jeannie because that would make her acknowledge she didn’t do the best as a parent.
3. Jeannie is the oldest and a girl. She naturally gets more treated as a third parent and they tend to “baby” the baby and boys especially depending on culture. Mama Mai needs to thank her lucky stars Jeannie Mai wants to keep working on the relationship. I don’t think her mom is a bad person I can’t imagine the trauma she had experienced,but she has to let go of some DEEP rooted issues and I don’t think Jeannie will be the one to help her. She will need a peer or someone from her culture to help her.
well said 💯
Totally Agree.
I was shook when the therapist said “ ông ngoại” in a perfect Vietnamese accent 😳
Props to the therapist! I've never been to therapy so watching her work with jeannie and mama mai to help them get to the root of how they're feeling was powerful