Chris Watts: "Darkness can destroy your soul" - A letter from Christopher
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- Опубликовано: 15 апр 2021
- This letter was a little hard to read due to Chris' handwriting! From the book, The Murders of Christopher Watts by Cheryln Cadle
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![Nichol Kessinger's "Got Ya": Why is Chris Watts spinning a new [old] narrative?](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/otHensGiE-0/mqdefault.jpg)
He acts like darkness and evil take over as if it invaded his body and he is a victim of this force ..not realizing He IS the darkness he IS the evil.
Right!
Vivian how do you know prove it.
Yes I agree, however there was definitely a lot of external manipulation and evil going on also.
Well said...no acknowledgement whatsoever. It is always someone elses fault in the narcs life.
He had this all planned out it didn't just happen like he trie's to say.
I find it odd that someone can kill somebody and cherish the memories with the person you killed. Especially someone like Chris who killed his family. There is no cure for this guy.
Exactly!! How could those memories bring any joy when you killed those children and wife those memories contain????!!! Seems to me they would be torture instead of bringing happiness!!!
@@karens3805 I might be talking or typing from my backside but I think he is projecting his content for what he has done to them indirectly. What I mean is he feels relieved and not feeling the pressure anymore, instead of talking negative about them he talks positive just to look good. You know when sometimes you feel pressure maybe at work and you are not happy for a while and been contemplating to resign even without a job and one day you decide to go for it and after you hand in your resignation you feel a huge relief and you feel more motivated and positive becasue you feel a heavy burden lifted off your chest? I think thats how he feels even though in jail.
@@patrick3178 that’s a really strong possibility. Something there is not normal or natural. He isn’t telling the truth about loving them so much. It doesn’t make sense. I think you’re right. They were a huge pressure and he feels relieved. With them gone, he can own the memory of them and the feelings of it. Just like people like Jodi Arias, who killed the man she was obsessed with Travis, she felt she still owned that time together and you can tell she was just as happy obsessing about him dead. Because he was an OBJECT to her, never a person. I think it’s the same with Chris. He doesn’t see them as people because he doesn’t have that human emotion. He’s mimicked it his whole life and is still trying to mimic it. But we can all FEEEL that it’s not adding up.
Normal people with true remorse couldn’t think of and want to talk about the amazing memories of someone without feeling so much pain that THEY are the ones that ended that. Only someone with something wrong or missing within their humanity can selectively remember like that.
@@angelabaird7135 just finished reading the book "My daddy is a hero" according to the letters he wrote to the woman who wrote the book about him, he said he felt no remorse killing his family. The book was worth reading, although it is not a diagnosis, there is enough info from his account and witnesses, police etc that he showed strong signs of psychopathy and narcissism or communal narcissism. The woman who wrote this book is psychotherapist.
I hope he isn’t keeping these photos and memories like trophies.. like a serial killer
Chris is fully responsible for his actions not some dark spirit.
He's pissing in the wind using that excuse.
You’re right there is no remorse what’s so ever
I think you nailed it, relief that he doesn't have to deal with anything anymore, and regret that he was caught. I doubt he'll every truly feel remorse.
For me listening to my preacher deliver the word of God is a blessing ,but to hear it from a murderer just doesn,t cut it for me.He is holier than now of of a sudden.
Debbie Maclean you are so very right!! To hear or read the word of GOD is truly a life altering experience and a blessing. To hear it from a person like Chris Watts MAKES MY SKIN CRAWL!!!
I feel the same. Hearing words sent by God shall be preached by someone other than Chris
It feels wrong coming from him. Like dirty. He's not taking accountability at all
Even our preachers are imperfect.
And I'm not comparing one person's sin to another persons, I'm just pointing out we can't listen to what the Bible says according to the reader reading it, he's only reciting what God says, but I kind of know what you mean.
If NK was still a part of his lying adulterous life he wouldn't be reminiscing about what he threw away. He had no feelings for his wife called her evil to his dad or those beautiful little girls that he put in oil batterys to make sure they didnt get up again. He killed them and dumped them like they were trash to him, when he thought he had NK it turns my stomach to hear this mass murderer give scriptural advice, YUCK He got caught up in what he calls "darkness" if he recognized it why didn't he excape? but that was what he wanted a key to the dungeon, he craved for what NK brought, to help him drop his mask. Go back to some of what he was used to. CW himself chose evil over his family over decentcy. He has little rights and no freedom and now only now he chooses to follow god? Let him get a letter from NK. A despicable human being. I keep seeing her letter to him, her text messages, that last picture taken of Shanann, how completely drained, how she didn't even look like herself, what he did to her just hours before he killed her. Then to tell the lie that she killed her children just because he knew his parents and sister didn't like her? Like they were going to be judge and jury in a court of law? He didn't get death penalty because it was to good for him. Rotting away for the rest of his life is what he deserves as well as for cindy, ronnie and jamie watts. They each one deserves to spend the absolute rest of their lives realizing what they as a family did to Shanann for eight years of her life and even beyond the grave their son dug and put her in.
I feel so seen with this comment. The way his parents speak of her, says it all. They really believe the first “confession”, that she killed the kids. They make my blood BOIL if anyone ever has, it’s no wonder how Chris turned out the way he did at all.
CW sounds happy. Good for him. He found happiness after smothering his children and choking the life out of his wife and unborn son. He talks of darkness and evil as if he discovered these in prison and not the morning he snuffed out his family. Grade A super narcissist.
Ugh he makes my skin crawl! Hes so out of touch with reality! He doesn't deserve those good memories that Shannan and HER babies gave him. He deserves nothing but bad dreams and haunting daily for the lives he wrecked. Laying on his bed with his new Male lover is not what I'd call being in prayer. St. Mattress doesn't count, chris!!
Domestic Goddess So what your saying is he's gotten pretty comfortable😁😍😋
@@glenchadwick420 lol well doesn't it normally mean that if your boyfriend/girlfriend gives you a drawer at their house?! (Cell) I mean, where else could he leave his ky jelly and baby oil? Maybe the new love likes to sniff his dirty boxes when hes alone...🤣🤣😜🤮
He doesn't have anything in him to care about Shannon and those beautiful gift's from God he destroyed with his own hand's. He can say he has repented all that he want's to but God know's the truth.
He is always reaching outside himself to look for a scapegoat. Now he’s blaming “the darkness”.
He is hiding behind pseudo-philosophy and “religion” to explain his actions. What a wanker!
He'll never accept responsibility for his actions. It just isn't in him.
Happy to know that people were kind Michelle❤️ it’s so sad to hear these words and how he destroyed them all because of his actions. I don’t feel remorse from these letters either.
This letter is sickening. He’s found Jesus and writes as if he’s gained all this wisdom and is leading souls to Christ. In my opinion this is a persona he’s created, another mask to conceal the fact that there is NOTHING inside. He believes the Lord is using this tragedy to save lost souls., so I guess the murders of four innocent souls and the pain and loss he has caused Shanann’s family isn’t a total loss! The fact that he can be at peace when so many lives have been destroyed is infuriating.
Sending you caring thoughts, Michelle.
He had this all planned out, he's a despicable human being and he will never get out. Thank God because there's women out there that think he can be trusted again. Never trust someone who would wipe out the most precious people he would ever have in his miserable life. I had to pray for God to take the anger from my heart because of this man. I'm still praying.
As a Christian, and while God is supposed to forgive our sins and treat our souls as if you never sinned, I find that very disconcerting. To think that he may be forgiven for those murders. Guess I need to pray about that.
He is just a strange, strange bird, smh. I've been to prison, you do whatever you must to maintain your sanity, tell yourself what you must. But the idea is that you contemplate what you've done, Accept your part and use your time to reconcile what you can and make changes for the better within yourself. Well, he's got the rest of his life to get it right.
His mum is even stranger.
The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
Truth
Agreed, and I think once the reality of what he did really hits him, I expect him to take his own life. I don't understand how he could even bring himself to kill his family much less live with that reality. Such a cruel, evil, pointless and stupid thing he did, his own family, unborn child and all.
@@helmet4400 I don't feel he should even be able to say their names out loud or write them or anything remotely like that he does not deserve to say their names. He lost that right when he ended their lives. He is such a narcissistic, soulless little pissant it just really makes my teeth ache.
@@Frenchblue8 He forfeited his right to breathe the minute he took their lives. I honestly don't know how he lives with himself.
His personal insight is about as deep as a puddle. No remorse from this guy.
CW is the darkness.. Reaching out from the darkness
He makes me sick. People like him turn to God to try and justify their horrific actions. He's insane. There is something seriously defective about how his brain is wired. An evil person who preaches the word of God is deluded.
Lots of evil people use God for their purpose...even Presidential candidates peddling Bibles held upside down...
So sorry bout the loss of your son. Must be impossible to deal with. May God bless you.
Afternoon sweetheart, my brother was killed in a car crash police knocked my door at 2.30 am I’ll never get over it xxx
Sorry to hear, I’m sure it’s tough
I’m so sorry for loss ❤️
It's as if he read a book titled "One Hundred Arduous Steps to Spiritual Enlightenment" and he decided to shorten the process by directly skipping over 99 steps so he could hit the Zenith without any fuss. It would be the same as playing Monopoly and hitting Board Walk on the very first roll of your dice. No need to feel guilt or shame...No! I am enlightened!
I'm glad you were able to find alittle peace from releasing your video
Chris watts is one fry short of a happy meal
Michelle, I am so sorry for your loss, my prayers are with you 🙏🏼
Regarding Chris Watts, IMHO there is absolutely no remorse & the only regret he has is that he was caught. I don’t believe one word of his new found faith. It is just yet another way of manipulating those around him. If he truly is a man of God, he would admit, to himself & others, what he did. I don’t think I’ve seen anywhere that he has said “I murdered my entire family” He is a pathological liar & I don’t think he will ever tell the truth.
RIP Shannan, Bella, Celeste & Nico❤️
People like chris are why I evade church
His dramatic religious babble is such a cop out
You said « thank you for all your support » but I wanna to thank you for all this work that you did, you do for us. It’s very appreciated 🌹From Quebec.... thank you xx
Michelle, I want to let you know that not only do I value and respect your input on things but I feel very thankful to be able to hear it. You have a way of making me understand things that not many people have ever been able to do and I thank you for taking your time to give us all these great videos and for putting things in perspective for us.
Sorry he takes zero responsibility may he rot in hell with the darkness that overcome him
Still watching all the videos and thank you for your time it’s great your intake and the way you present and say things very loving of you and It takes me few times to watch each time
Once again another Great video michelle 😎 xx really enjoy learning more about this case with you ♥️ xxx I agree he still shows no remorse just regret at this point
He thinks he is some kind of monk. Lol Chris nobody cares how pious you are now
Excellent work Michelle!
I've unfortunately experienced pure evil ppl ...who hide n say they love u....reason ur videos r so important.... especially 4 the unsuspecting...🥀
I think he regrets getting caught. I honestly don't think a man like this dolt could feel anything but relief if he'd been smart enough to get away with it. Relief vs Regret = depends on which side of the bars you're standing on.
Thankyou Michelle. And for your personal video.
It feels good, Michelle, to ; trust in lowering your guard. I am sorry to hear your peccidillo, but it was a lovely gesture of trust.
It's massive . 💐 🖐️🌮🥤
You're a Beautiful Brave Soul...Thank You for sharing you & your son's memory 🙏❣️
I really enjoy your channel. I can’t wait to arch this later tonight. Your always in my watch later playlist. Thanks for the hard work you put into your videos Cause I really enjoy your take. Also, in an autism Mommy. I get you
Another great video Michelle 💝 thanks lovely U take care xxx 🇦🇺
I don’t feel sorry for Chris,at first I did but now I don’t .I have been following this case for a while . This man had a family beautiful kids and wife .I don’t care how many problems he had in this marriage . There is a way to do things .as soon as his wife was away for almost a month he went and start sleeping with another woman .no respect for his wife .she was pregnant carrying his child .after he killed his whole family for another woman ,now he’s in jail ,he can find the lord now .he reads the Bible . Why didn’t he do that before .turn to GOD .now he wants forgiveness.😞🥺
He didn't kill for another woman.
@@bondjames652 For what then?? He has admitted doing the killing to be free for NK.
Just out of curiosity, why on earth did you feel sorry for that repulsive baby killer? I'm finding it hard to wrap my head around it.
@@luzsarach5717 That was his excuse. He killed them because if he just walked away, he'd have to pay child support. He would have killed them with or without NK.
He actually thinks he can manipulate God
!!! That's a good way of putting it !!!
Chris preaching to us
Oh, please
A family annihilator pontificating to us. Sheesh.
Michelle thanku 4 all u do 4 us....we appreciate u so much....ur British n proud like us in usa...kisses 😘
I'm a recovering catholic...I remember murder being a mortal sin which is unforgivable in God's eyes. I was just thinking about another of your videos...a letter in which he says sin is all the same in God's eyes.
@Tamar Harris maybe...I didnt look at it that way. I saw if more as minimizing his crimes. Triple homicide = stealing a candy bar to CW. does not compute to me.
Yes God bless you Michelle, for your courage and vulnerability 💕
Thanks for the video
At the end of this letter, it sounds like CW won a Grammy, thanking everyone... his family, friends, girlfriend, fans, and God. It’s flippin unreal, lol. And yes, it’s 🤯 how he always refers to his murder spree as “the tragedy.”
You have a big heart❤ God Bless You❤
I don't know whether Chris' conversion is real or not, so I'll reserve judgement on that. I will say that he's still using distancing and excusing language to talk about his murders. The Apostle Paul never shied away from the darkness in his past. He wrote "Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners-of whom I am the worst." No excuses, no "it just happened", no "I couldn't stop myself", none of that. He was transparent about his guilt and grateful for forgiveness. Maybe Chris is still early in his relationship with God, but it is genuine. If so, he'll find that one way or another, he will have to accept the reality of what he did. What HE did. Not an invisible presence, not some unknown darkness. What HE did.
Thinking of You, Michelle 🤗💞✌🏼
It’s absolutely sickening to see how much denial and delusion CW still has re his annihilation of his own family. And the self protective narrative he is deluding himself with each day means he’s simply not suffering enough for the atrocities he has committed. I find him offensive on every level.
For His acts he blames darkness and dark force.
But for household problems he blames Shannan. Like he is THE best he never did anything wrong.
It would be interesting to understand his childhood. He committed a familicide and his mother says, “ I don’t care what you did”.....not normal! Normal would be, I love you but HATE what you have done to your wife and children!!! Chris seems like his Mother, self centered; all about his wants and desires! That being said, I will never understand how he could commit such a horrific crime
He and his mother should stay far away from one another because they are too much alike and bring out the worst in each other, I suspect
I LOVE LOVE how Michelle said, "you could have so many more good memories Chris". And she is so right. Needless to mention in this video, Chris's words vs actions are very inconsistent. I also really liked how Michelle said, "Well, no one will trust you Chris".
My last thoughts, Chris keeps thanking the people who support him. Who supports you Chris?
Maybe in his imagination he has supporters.
Sociopath's / phycopaths, have no guilt, no worries, they just do not have that emotion!! He's telling His STORY.... Remember, he's the guy, who, was preaching for his wife and children to come home, while they were floating in crude oil and thrown into the hole, as he shoveled the black dirt over his wife...he disgusts me..
chris watts said" I never would have ended my family if I not met nikki".
Chris Watts is an absolute Master of the passive voice, and one which expresses anything Chris believes others wish to hear (or which will help him keep his greatest distance from threats or fearfulnes). Coming from a lifetime of being told what to think, feel and do, it's as though he is afraid of who he might truly be/think/say if left to his own devices. It seems as though there's no original organic substance to him, like he's made of two-dimensional cardboard with only the identity he is/has been assigned by others. I wonder if he experiences anything genuinely. And I wonder if his mother realizes how many traits she and Shannann shared in their willingness to assign an identity to Chris, and how willing Chris was to accept it. (Apologies to Shannann -- no disrespect intended.)
Wow! Becareful there! For God can't be used or mocked! Isaiah 40:31 among other verses are sinking in. But when will Chris take responsibility?!
Why does he have all the freedom with food Tv and internet for killing not one but 4 family members ? He should have suffered like Shannan Bella Cece and Niko ! God forgive me for hating this soul for what he did !
Terrified of judgement day that’s all that is.
Hes definitely a weirdo.
Him talking about the Lord but never acknowledging the murders he commited let you know he doesn't have an ounce in sanity or regret.
How could he stomach such wonderful memories & not have then overshadowed by the actual murders. I've always felt he wasn't remorseful but maybe his mind blocks it out for self preservation..?
He doesn’t care. If he cared he wouldn’t have killed them. This is all an act
He's a psychopath.
Think of it how you would feel about a really nice car you wrecked and wrecked on purpose. That's about as deep as he is capable of feeling.
There's no emotional attachment just like you'd have no emotional attachment to a car.
He's using alot of distancing language. First he says the evil got into him so in his mind he didn't kill his family the evil did.Why is it a lot of people that go to prison they find God? He's also blaming Nicole for it.I dont think he'll ever come to terms with what he did.
What the real kicker is, is that he thinks that we would just listen to him like he is the dalai lama. I think I'll pass on any advice from you Chrissy boy.
Yes......Now he's the all knowing Guru and we should all kiss the ground he walks on. I agree with you, I'll take my advice from people who have true compassion from others.
Sparklers? nerve wracking?
Let's put something into perspective here Chris, do you remember what you did?
He said the fireworks reminded him about the past , my question is why kill them just 2 have a memery
He hasn't Really found GOD- HES talking with his Best Friend- the DEVIL...
He blames darkness. He thinks he didn t kill his family , but darkness did . Why isnt he crying then ? And totaly lose his mind for missing his daughters and Shannan . He doesn t miss them ??? He should shower in oil , I hate him so much !
You are so right Michelle with the distancing CW engages to be able to blame others than himself for his own actions. Listening to him writing about scripture just makes me want to be sick- talk about using the Bible as his new crutch while he still doesn’t take any responsibility for what he did …..
They always find god once they go to prison
OHHHH!!! Now I get it! Shanann *HOPED* Chris wouldn’t kill her, Nico, Bella, and CeCe....so, he had no choice, because she gave herself over to pride.
Why is he still allowed to say their names? Can’t we make it a law that he botched up his right to let their names escape his lips?
Ironically Chris now feels that he is a celebrity after all he receives hundreds of letters even money it sickens me . I feel if your in prison you should not have any privileges such as mail other than your parents & siblings. I think you should not be allowed T.v. phone calls books all things art along with mind you schooling. Hello its suppose to be punishment not the Y.M.C.A. in early history jail was jail you did not have any amenities ( none ). I find it disrespectful to all victims whom fallen into the abyss of a insane person and murdered by these nuts! I wait daily for that news that Chris Watts had been found dead in his cell. Blessings to all whom are living with the loss of a loved one falling prey to a sick madman. Bless your hearts..🖤🙏🏻🖤🙏🏻
And in his case, lust.
Does he not take responsibility for his actions?😳😳😑😔😞
Hi Michelle..... I just wanted to point something out to you that I would LOVE!!!! For you to respond to..... it’s a very strange occurrence that was picked up on Chris Watts polygraph lie detector test pt 2 under mommy ramblings blog..... I’m using her video because it’s the time stamp I no. At 107:13 it’s when Chris is in the room alone after using the rest room... he sits down his wallet and you can hear him say Dad no! He’s repeating Bella’s last words... then at 107:31 plain as day he says nooooooooo IMO Shananns last words, I don’t think anyone picked up on this... please listen and let us know what you think... it’s really quite disturbing! Thank you!
Is it him saying those words though? Definitely eerie...maybe from the other side
@@melaniemccormack8742 I’m so glad you said that! ... I didn’t want to sound crazy... but now I have to say.... in the video where the police show up at Criss’s house with the dogs.. there are EVP’S on there... when the male dog handler is in the basement w the female officer there is a male evp that says.. “something told her” ... I’ve listened to these over and over again and it sounds like the same voice..
Michelle, about earlier: You must know, tell something so personal , loze your child, sad things. I think you must feel heavy. Please relax a bit. You deserve it. You must kno i love you, and this whole group loves you 💗🤍💙Holland, EU
Hindsight's a wonderful thing, aay Chris?
Warts is far too comfortable day to day for my liking. Wish the prison warders would 'accidently leave his cell unlocked' or 'turn a blind eye' every now and again and allow some of the inmates to mete their own kind of justice on him. He deserves to live every minute of each and every day in fear. I make no apology for wishing this on this monster.
Lil bro thought that would work 💀☠️☠️🙏
In a certain spiritual context he is correct , since it is recommended that you have absolutely no attachment to anything in this world, aside G, including hope. To achieve ascension. Looks like he has turned his obsession towards this now, too little too late like you said 🤷♀️
Don't believe a word he says I see right through him trying to pull Lynn if found god I might get out on good behaviour on I was possessed by evil they might feel sorry for me and deem me mentally ill I might get out ,, THATS ONLY REASON HES PULLING ALL THESE CARDS
His family had helped his family from the beginning. Is he stating that about his parents? If not showing up to birthdays,weddings and running his wife off for sticking up for cw and her kids. Then he is screwed up worse then I thought
I think he's just trying to paint a picture to Cheryl and whoever might read the book frankly that he's a good guy and really was a great father until what? Until he became a homicidal maniac? ' Oh Yea, loved those Fourth of Julys, all of the picnics and barbecues and days at the beach and the fireworks as soon as it started getting dark. What a normal Dad I am, err....was. oops.'
No I don't buy it, I'm not getting regret certainly not remorse. I'll never forget him sitting in that courtroom a day or so or whatever it was after he confessed and not a tear. No bowed head, no overt stress, absolutely nothing, he looked like he was listening to an effing school lecture and I believe I commented as such at the time. I think he might remember times when he and his sister were kids ~but he just wrote it like it was his own children he was thinking of . I see him as he's just playing to his fame, always with an eye on an appeal or whatever, trying to paint himself in the best light while simultaneously weaving in just enough expressions of consciousness of guilt in order to craft a sympathy response.
Good luck, Watts. You're playing to an audience of two. Your biological cheerleaders. Oh yes~ and the few misfit women who think it's 'hot' that you're a killer. God forbid.
If he is a true man of God. He should tell the truth about it all what was suppose to happen who was the mind behind all the murders. He needs to tell the whole truth
Yes i think you are right when you said that everything he is saying is what he thinks people want to hear and not his real feelings or thoughts, he is so fake
CWs had this all planned out it didn't just happen like he trie's to portray. He used everyone in his life that was good to him, it's just pathetic the way he has tried to blame everyone but himself. He's responsible for his family being gone and all of the grief he has caused. I've got zero sympathy for him, he used the people who treated him like family and loved him.
Thanks Michelle, it's amazing God has forgiven him, when he shows no remorse. He's just speaking religion, I doubt those feelings are real either. All the stupid people mailing him money, what fools.
Why is he given any attention?
Let him languish in solitude.
The Chameleon now has a new identity to swallow him up.........There is no opportunity for remorse now that this new fanatical Christian is born. He is like the Phoenix emerging from the ashes!
I don't think he has the ability to see the character flaws within himself and take realistic steps to change..........He will always find some new magical mask to hide behind.
I'm always suspicious of people who pretend to have all the answers.
No repentence that's first
This psychopath will be a model prisoner and religious with one goal in mind to get out thats all he wants and I hope he stays in prison for life
He's saying hope in the world is lesser than hope in Christ
Those who believe Christ will save them from their sin after life have more to hope in than the let downs of this world, no matter what happens in their life or how bad it gets. There's a greater plan kind of thinking. I would replace the word "darkness" with the wors sin. It might make a bit more sense.
How about Chris finally tells the truth? Hmmm?
He acts like he is talking about someone else.
Chris Watts is not is not playing with a full deck😂
Basically he's blaming nikki....pathetic 😡
Just a suggestion but when you are reading something that's been authored by someone else, maybe instead of your own interpretation without all the details try and read it as it is so each person can make an interpretation on his words.
It's just that it can sound as if you are being manipulative and trying to make it sound like it's according to your own opinions.
I know that isn't what you are doing and I hope you take this as it's meant, constructive criticism.
His pride was the evil, worldly.. I believe shannon threatened to divorce his cause of his insideous mom who would not respect shannon cause of chris.. Nk was retribution for shannan contemplating divorce in april.. He cut off his feelings for her in my opinion..
Chris Watts, do you even have a soul?
Yet Chris didn't attend Sunday services with his family, did he?
Gosh he is so crazy. But to be honest I do believe that he has remorse and guilt. I think he has a hard time with the fact he let something.... Well someone lead him to do what he did. I do believe he is tortured by what he's done. So much to the point he talks as if they were still here and calls it a tragedy. I think he is calling his affair evil. Idk, to be honest.... I'm probably just trying to tell myself there is no way he couldn't feel remorse.
I think your exactly right! It certainly seems he is totally in denial as to what he's really done!! He knows yet he can't let the real reality of it set in! And he has no choice but to grab hold of God! It's his only way to survive- no way he could handle knowing he was locked up there for ever and the flashes of killing his family them gone forever and everyone knowing how bad he was! I still can not see how he could have done this!! Not your typical murderer- I believe evil force was deffinetly there in him- I believe he is where he belongs no matter- I've also wondered if maybe he was hypnotized to some degree.?? To have never ever his whole live to have even displayed any type of even anger- or aggression- adding to that litterly being a coward to the fullest extent- then to not just snap and kill one but 4 and the babies 2 times horrific and not seem phased by it. No nervousness! That's the main reason I wonder about some type hypnosis- was his calmness his ability to communicate and perform completely normal. I don't think the cruelest and the craziest could do that. He spoke about how evil NK and her friends were and dark things that they did just makes me wonder.