this song makes "I'm past the point of hating myself bc i cant even feel anything anymore so i just sit here and cry and hope someone will save me from this fucking hellhole of a life" into song form
Light vent warning, if your mentally not okay then ignore but if interested you can read Yeah, ADHD ruined everything for me, I could have been a normal girl with okay friends, instead I went to a special school with a psychopath classmate and toxic af girls, I can’t get over the fact how that psychopath girl changes to hating me and wanting me to die to being suddenly “nice” to me, my parents tell me to leave it and forget it happened, BUT HOW?! they did not go school or atleast I know they have not so I don’t know if they can relate, I think my sis can relate, I just needed to vent sorry, but if that psychopath girl does something over limit I am LEAVING that school, thank you if you saw but you did not have too
Edit for 1st comment Btw I am not sure if my parents will let me leave that school if that happened because where will I go? What happened my current friends there? But yet again I can just go to a normal school because when I used to go to a normal school a lot of people was nice to me, it is disgusting how people are like, but yet again I will need a special need teacher, I might research on some ADHD medication and think if I want to go on it, I am not old enough to choose so my parents have to pick though
I feel so special when I'm with my friend so if we ever stop being friends I want to do anything I can to get back together, I've never felt that type of affection, I'd do anything to have more of itm Aha edit: so uhm we stopped being friends around 3 months ago bc he started faking DID and guilt tripping me for everything and threatened to steal my cat😕😕
Personally, I feel it could also be because moving on feels like you're losing yourself because so much of you is based around hurt (cause you've got a bad habit of dwelling in the past) so if you did ever "feel better" you'd end up being a stranger to yourself?
I think this song is about how you always tell yourself “I’ll never date someone” but you finally do and after the break up you realize feelings are special and you don’t wanna feel better because you think that you will never get in a relationship ever again because of what happened
@@verdeamarillo4979 i feel like it's a metaphor about how love consumes you, you feast on that love,that feeling you crave and you give into it you'r whole, because you never wanna stop feeling that special feeling, but at the same time it just eats you up, you gave it you'r all till there was nothing left to give, therefore nothing left of you
@@verdeamarillo4979 I think it is about the idiom/metaphor that goes like, “you can’t have and eat it too” which the songs says. But I think it’s about the girl having a “nice guy” and then dating him, like you can’t have a nice guy and date him too. I think
this is the song for when you fall in love once and then never again and you desperately try to recover those feelings because it seems like there is something seriously wrong with you
this perfectly describes me. im a grayromantic, and i lost my feelings super early into the relationship i had, and after it ended i didnt like the fact that i felt better after the breakup. i wanted to love him, and even months after our breakup, i still want to love him the way i used to. i just cant, its so frustrating.
depressing songs need to stop being so relatable or i need to go see a therapist //ayo this comment blew up jeez, just a disclaimer I /am/ in therapy and even was during the time I was writing this! Please, if you are struggling with anything, I do suggest it! Stay safe everyone
"or i'm a healthy baby girl who traded sunshine for disease" it's kind of sad that i relate to that on such a personal level. but i didn't trade in my sunshine, it was taken from me and replaced with anxiety disorders and depression, gender dysphoria and self-loathing. thanks, pops, leaving your "little girl" for six months and then coming back just to hurt her for everything she ever did was a great idea.
This reminds me of a father leaving and I kinda relate to the fact that breakup songs hit differently when your father leaves and you are just waiting for him, especially when you're a child and too young to actually have romantic feelings.
god i relate so bad to you. the abandonment, mental illness, gender dysphoria, self-hatred. we're completely different people that are miles away from each other, but we're so alike at the same time... anyway, i'm sorry for everything that happened to you. we both don't deserve this shit. hugs to you internet stranger
This song to me feels like someone who’s been hurt so bad that they’re terrified to love again- to be left/to leave again. Someone terrified so much about moving on and losing their identity that they’d rather be hung up over someone they don’t care about anymore than have the feeling and have to confront the fact that they’re alone.
This song gives me "I want to go back to the friend who abused me for 2 years because I was the happiest with them and no one has ever cared about me as much as they did, and although hurt me, I still love them and I want to forget everything they did me and run back to their arms" vibes
Yes, I would always feel like choosing to be with her and being in pain because of her than being without her, but now she's kinda gone and I miss her, no matter how many tears I cried, I miss her
@@kokoawolf7243 not them but, I've had the exact experience this artist went through, nasty breakup and the person meant the world to me, broke down all the time and let my resentment to life break me, hearing that same experience written and sung out better than I could ever mentally process it kinda put the puzzle pieces together and let me fix myself That and it makes me know I'm not alone in these experiences
My best friend died in his sleep 2 weeks ago. I fell in love with him in high school, but he was gay and not into me (a girl) so we stayed friends, and it was wonderful, and were closer than ever for 6 years and then he just died all alone when I should have been there for him. He just turned 20, I'm only 3 months younger than him. I've never felt closer to another human soul than I have him, I have no luck in love, but at the end of the day I had him to fall back on when everything failed me. Now I'm really alone. I feel like I died when he did. Ethan I'm so sorry I'm not being strong like you would have wanted....I'm no good without you. I'll keep living for you until I finally get to die. You were the kindest man I've ever known and you always deserved better. Your last word to me never should have been sorry, because the one at fault has always been me. I'll hug you as soon as my time comes...I love you dearly my friend....please be patient for me....I'm coming.
why does everyone focus on self care when this song exists? it’s gorgeous and everyone just bullies penelope scott over self care. same goes for soap, lotta true crime and others, they’re brilliant
Lyrics: I don't wanna feel better No one's ever gonna love me like that again I don't wanna get over you I wanna sit with you in bed I don't wanna feel better I'd give anything to miss you again I don't wanna get over it I wanna get under it instead A book sits on top of clean and messy blankets On a bed that fucking creaks at night when I get in it late And late at night I'm chugging gatorade And someone's breaking up And I crack up because I know I'll never know just what to say I'm a communist a terrorist a MPDG thot Or I'm a sad girl in a dorm room Living out the shitty christian plot of Twilight or the Bible or the Lover by Duras Or I'm just really fucking selfish and really fucking lost But someone loved me Someone fucking loved me Someone fucking loved me and I fucking loved them too God dammit I was worth something I fucking learned something I had my cake I ate it It ate me too And god no I don't wanna feel better I don't wanna feel better I'd give anything to miss you again I don't wanna get over it I wanna rip it to shreds We kept our liquor in a suitcase underneath my bed And we drank it to go out or to stay in or to feel sad But in a hot way in A way I'll fucking never have again The sun has begun to set I'm a socialist Marxist libertarian slut I am an awkward teenaged virgin And I sorta kinda laugh a lot in bed But other times I cry or don't make noise at all I'd give my life to have a room that feels that small Someone loved me Someone fucking loved me Someone fucking loved me I loved them too God dammit I was worth something I fucking earned something I had a right to die a right to live and a right to choose too And god no Of course I don't wanna feel better Can you fucking imagine No one's ever gonna love me like that again I don't wanna get over it I wanna rip the stars to shreds I don't wanna feel better I mean of course it hurt Of course it fucking hurt It hurt like nothing in the world sometimes And I was super scared And we were all a train wreck but also somehow making it I think I might've died there twice And I would do it all again I'm a nihilist a soldier an OCD machine Or I'm a healthy baby girl who traded Sunshine for disease But when my head hit my cheap pillow I could tell I had a heart And I wanna tear this fascist milky way apart Because someone loved me Someone fucking loved me On my filthy life I loved someone I barely knew God dammit I was worth something I fucking learned something And it felt better in my mouth than fresh warm food I guess I loved you I guess I really loved you On my filthy life I love someone I barely knew And now you're over there And I'm way over here What am I gonna do I don’t wanna feel better No one’s ever gonna love me like that again I don’t want to get over you I wanna sit with you in bed I don’t wanna feel better
(Btw before anyone starts commenting “it’s a lyric video” yes, I’m aware. I just find it easier to have all of the lyrics displayed at once like this and I thought it could be helpful for other people too)
The organs in the back just gives a whole new meaning to this song for me , of not getting over grief but its not grief more like a indescribable feeling of hatred towards someone but its also directed at yourself
For me this represents the denial stage when you break up with someone and the feeling of not wanting to move on and just hold onto that relationship as long as you can cause it was amazing and gave you life for the first time in your whole existence.
tw 2:31 & 3:01 reminds me of how i was groomed. i realized how i needed to let go bc its for the best, and it hurt me a lot. im glad i did that, im happier i am today than before.
same here. it’s so hard to understand that it was wrong and i didn’t deserve that looking back because i was so in love with the person i thought i knew. its still hard trying to hate them, bc that younger version of myself in me loves them.
2:36-2:47 I relate with this part too much- I hate him, I don't love them, I'm glad that i opened my eyes and saw that it wasn't healthy for my mental health
I hope you're doing okay! I can't imagine the kind of pain and resentment you feel. I hope you don't beat yourself up on your past mistakes too much. Try to focus on how to be better instead! Life is too short to live through your regrets. You probably already know this, but a reminder is always nice! Hope you have a lovely day, and i'm so sorry.
This song feels like how you would feel like if you were in a really bad place in your life and there was only one person in your life and you felt like you loved them even though you didnt, you just saw them as a "savior" and when they left, you just felt like you faked it for attention. Does that make sense
Oml that hit home- the first year of middle school I was a happy normal girl but things slowly started changing and while I still had my friend group I felt so alone, I had very few classes with them and ig that’s what made me feel alone. Exept I had my best friend . I saw her as my savior because I was so close to ending my life but she was what made it better. If it wasn’t for her I think I would have been dead by now. But for high school I had to go to a different school. It’s hell all over again and the thoughts keep coming back. I want to talk to her more but I don’t want to be annoying. During my freshman year that was online cuz of covid I started thinking I had a thing for her and cried myself to sleep because I missed my chance. She now has someone she loves very much and I’m happy for her, I really am I just regret not telling her while I had the chance.
I know it's technically about a romance, but this song reminds me so much of my friend. We stopped talking almost a year ago because I was a selfish jerk and unnecessary rude to her sometimes and she didn't deserve any of it. I missed her more than anything and I tried every day to be a better person. She recently reached out to me and said she had loved me and had really missed me. I proposed starting all over again, but I feel like she kind of lost interest in me because a lot of time has passed. I still love her and I can't stand losing her for the second time, but I fear that's what's going to happen and that's why I'm writing this at 3 am basically to a void, because no one is going to read that comment, but I need to tell that story to someone. 😭
Hey, I’m really sorry that this is happening to you. I don’t have any advice or anything, but if you want to talk, there’s plenty of people here for you (including me)
this is the same as me too :(, i had this friend (which is my classmate) and we were very close before, we also stopped talking almost a year ago too because i think her dad didnt want me to talk again anymore with her. i was also a selfish jerk and was also unnecessary being rude to her. i feel so bad and i wanted to be a better person too everyday. she never deserved any of it too, i feel such an awful person of how i treated her before. she did reached out to me a year ago and she told me that she's back, but then she never texted me again or reply to my messages. i miss her so much, and i dont wanna lose her too :( i still love her so much no matter what. i can never move on because i miss her so much.
I'm a nihilist a soldier an OCD machine Or I'm a healthy baby girl who traded Sunshine for disease But when my head hit my cheap pillow I could tell I had a heart And I wanna tear this fascist milky way apart
At 0:39 seconds, when she said ‘and late at night I’m chugging Gatorade’ I ALMOST CHOKED BECAUSE I WAS ACTUALLY DRINKING GATORADE WHILE LISTENING TO THIS 😭😂
I don't wanna feel better No one's ever gonna love me like that again I don't wanna get over you I wanna sit with you in bed I don't wanna feel better I'd give anything to miss you again I don't wanna get over it I wanna get under it instead A book sits on top of clean and messy blankets On a bed that fucking creaks at night when I get in it late And late at night I'm chugging gatorade And someone's breaking up And I crack up because I know I'll never know just what to say I'm a communist a terrorist a MPDG thot Or I'm a sad girl in a dorm room Living out the shitty christian plot of Twilight or the Bible or the Lover by Duras Or I'm just really fucking selfish and really fucking lost But someone loved me Someone fucking loved me Someone fucking loved me and I fucking loved them too God dammit I was worth something I fucking learned something I had my cake I ate it It ate me too And god no I don't wanna feel better I don't wanna feel better I'd give anything to miss you again I don't wanna get over it I wanna rip it to shreds We kept our liquor in a suitcase underneath my bed And we drank it to go out or to stay in or to feel sad But in a hot way in A way I'll fucking never have again The sun has begun to set I'm a socialist Marxist libertarian slut I am an awkward teenaged virgin And I sorta kinda laugh a lot in bed But other times I cry or don't make noise at all I'd give my life to have a room that feels that small Someone loved me Someone fucking loved me Someone fucking loved me I loved them too God dammit I was worth something I fucking earned something I had a right to die a right to live and a right to choose too And god no Of course I don't wanna feel better Can you fucking imagine No one's ever gonna love me like that again I don't wanna get over it I wanna rip the stars to shreds I don't wanna feel better I mean of course it hurt Of course it fucking hurt It hurt like nothing in the world sometimes And I was super scared And we were all a train wreck but also somehow making it I think I might've died there twice And I would do it all again I'm a nihilist a soldier an OCD machine Or I'm a healthy baby girl who traded Sunshine for disease But when my head hit my cheap pillow I could tell I had a heart And I wanna tear this fascist milky way apart Because someone loved me Someone fucking loved me On my filthy life I loved someone I barely knew God dammit I was worth something I fucking learned something And it felt better in my mouth than fresh warm food I guess I loved you I guess I really loved you On my filthy life I love someone I barely knew And now you're over there And I'm way over here What am I gonna do
The feeling or regret. Letting them go. Being scared you'll never feel again. Explaining how you are feeling to them and accidently saying how you feel for them in the middle of it. Ah so many mixed emotions.
Something about this song speaks to me so much. It might be the over angry opening switches to a numbness like a mask falling, or it might be laughing at the idea of feeling better. But man does this encompass my mental state
you know when you finally open up to someone and trust them to love you unconditionally like they promised, you trust them to not abandon you like they *promised* and the moment you let them in and finally feel safe and happy for once in your pathetic life they fuck you over and get mad when you snap because everything you ever loved is crumbling down around you at once and you cant do anything to hold the pieces together? yeah.
I like this song. Tw: vent. It reminds me about my ex girlfriend who I had to ghost because my mom didn’t approve of me being lgbt. Ever since that life has gone downhill all throughout my family. I don’t wanna get better though. It costs too much for therapy and the only comfort I have is sleeping. I always spent my nights like Penelope described. Laying down in my own sorrow while chugging down Gatorade since I’m a minor and I can’t drink. I just wish things couldn’t have ended up like this.
This song reminds me of when you build your whole life around a specific person and give up everything like your relationships with friends or family to make them happier and then not knowing what to do after that relationship fails because you didn't have much going for you other than that one relationship. By unhealthy relationship I mean platonic ones too btw. I see a lot of people talk about unhealthy romantic relationships, but not too many people talking about unhealthy friendships which can be just as draining and horrible.
Everyone’s talking about how this song reminds them of a break up but this song reminds me of my father. Sometimes I feel like he was the only person who actually cared for me. He’s the reason I got into art too. He used to bring paints everyday for me. And I don’t want to ever get over missing him because I don’t want to forget him.
@@TheRadical0ne That sucks, man. I went through the same. Maybe don't get back together. More often than not it doesn't work out. But that's just a suggestion
This gives off the vibe of like ''I'm on the verge of dying but I'm so emotionally attached to someone who I know doesn't likes me back, but I still just can't get over them so I'm trying my best not to give up rn''
For me this song is about being obsessed with fictional characters to the point you can't spend a day without daydreaming about them and not wanting to stop because that is the only thing that keeps you moving
“On my filthy life i loved someone i barely knew” this lyric always reminds me of the time i got into a fight with my online friend and stopped talking only for me to realise he wasn’t the person i though he was and i just made a fake impression of him just because i liked him.
I can really relate to this song because my dad used to frequently manipulate me and then he left and never came back, My mother never really comforted me, she just kinds said something along the lines of "some people have it worse than you."or "get over it, your a big boy" and I never really had a childhood
1:53 This feels like the place to vent, so I don’t know, I just can’t believe someone loved me. 🙁 And I ruined everything, and it’s all my fault. I don’t even know who’s right or wrong anymore, all I know is that I started this, and it’s all my fault, I was so blind snd stupid and naive, I’m so angry, I only noticed the red flags when it was too late. And now, I’ve ruined everything. And the worst part is they loved **me.** Just me for me. Or maybe they didn’t, I don’t even know anymore.
Do you guys get that feeling where your not sad all the time but every like once a week, you face the fact that even if you ingore it, your still gonna be very very sad deep down no matter what you do
this song makes "I'm past the point of hating myself bc i cant even feel anything anymore so i just sit here and cry and hope someone will save me from this fucking hellhole of a life" into song form
I’m concerned on how this is so specific
There’s a point where therapy is the best course of action, your name is “inevitable death” take care of yourself
Same. The mood where you're at that point in your life when you say something that sounds normal to you and people start to ask if you're ok
Same
@@ImBerryDumb tell them that you aren’t mentally feeling well and that you’d like to seek professional help
I think it's strange how her lyrics are so obscure and personal yet so relatable. I love her music so much.
It’s like no matter you r experience you can connect it to this song, I personally connect the loss of my brother
@@quirmi_6770 hey I’m sure your brother is ok and he wants you to be happy!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
@@arwen1746 he didn’t die it was just a hard break up for the parents so contact was totally broken….
@@arwen1746 update!!!! HE GOES TO MY SCHOOL NOE!!! I SAW HIM!! I SAW HIM!!! I gave him a hug and I was so excited 8th grade is gonna he the best
@@quirmi_6770 YAYYYY I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!❤️❤️❤️🥰 try to be with him! 8th grade is going fo be great I promise!!
the line "or im a healthy baby girl who traded sunshine for disease" HITS SO DIFFERENT-
aaaa ty for the likes :>
Light vent warning, if your mentally not okay then ignore but if interested you can read
Yeah, ADHD ruined everything for me, I could have been a normal girl with okay friends, instead I went to a special school with a psychopath classmate and toxic af girls, I can’t get over the fact how that psychopath girl changes to hating me and wanting me to die to being suddenly “nice” to me, my parents tell me to leave it and forget it happened, BUT HOW?! they did not go school or atleast I know they have not so I don’t know if they can relate, I think my sis can relate, I just needed to vent sorry, but if that psychopath girl does something over limit I am LEAVING that school, thank you if you saw but you did not have too
Edit for 1st comment
Btw I am not sure if my parents will let me leave that school if that happened because where will I go? What happened my current friends there? But yet again I can just go to a normal school because when I used to go to a normal school a lot of people was nice to me, it is disgusting how people are like, but yet again I will need a special need teacher, I might research on some ADHD medication and think if I want to go on it, I am not old enough to choose so my parents have to pick though
Update>
I am okay now... I can’t change schools, it’s fine,
@{Angel Chan} sorry tp hear that r u doing ok
this song sounds like the fear of moving on because you feel like you can’t
it's exactly like that omg
I feel so special when I'm with my friend so if we ever stop being friends I want to do anything I can to get back together, I've never felt that type of affection, I'd do anything to have more of itm
Aha edit: so uhm we stopped being friends around 3 months ago bc he started faking DID and guilt tripping me for everything and threatened to steal my cat😕😕
EXACTLY
Yep..
Personally, I feel it could also be because moving on feels like you're losing yourself because so much of you is based around hurt (cause you've got a bad habit of dwelling in the past)
so if you did ever "feel better" you'd end up being a stranger to yourself?
“And God no, of course I don’t wanna feel better! Can you fucking imagine?”
*cue arson*
LMAO
LMAO
*yes*
lmaoaoa
Pfft-
I think this song is about how you always tell yourself “I’ll never date someone” but you finally do and after the break up you realize feelings are special and you don’t wanna feel better because you think that you will never get in a relationship ever again because of what happened
oop- don't call me out like that-
Don't call me out like that
Haha thats me
Where the cameras at? 🤡
Wtf, this is exactly what happened to me
The part that says "I ate it, it ate me too, And god no" hits different idk-
I don't understand that line, what does it mean?
@@verdeamarillo4979 i feel like it's a metaphor about how love consumes you,
you feast on that love,that feeling you crave and you give into it you'r whole, because you never wanna stop feeling that special feeling, but at the same time it just eats you up, you gave it you'r all till there was nothing left to give, therefore nothing left of you
exactly
@@verdeamarillo4979 I think it is about the idiom/metaphor that goes like, “you can’t have and eat it too” which the songs says. But I think it’s about the girl having a “nice guy” and then dating him, like you can’t have a nice guy and date him too. I think
@@verdeamarillo4979 man it's the second time i see you asking what the lyrics mean JSJSJQHWJ
This has Marceline energy.
But why are u not lieing?
OMG YASSS
All of her songs do.
Yes
AGREED
this is the song for when you fall in love once and then never again and you desperately try to recover those feelings because it seems like there is something seriously wrong with you
omg
EXACTLY.
Did it ever get better?
WHAT THE FUK HOW DID U JUST MANAGE TO EXPLAIN MY LOVE LIFE
hey so uh I’m not here to diagnose anyone’s orientations but some of y’all in this thread might wanna look into the possibility of being arospec?
this perfectly describes me. im a grayromantic, and i lost my feelings super early into the relationship i had, and after it ended i didnt like the fact that i felt better after the breakup. i wanted to love him, and even months after our breakup, i still want to love him the way i used to. i just cant, its so frustrating.
Im going through that right now and there has only ever been one person I can't lose feelings for but she's my bestfriend
that literally happened to me
Thank you for writing this comment it's so validating💗 for whatever reason I dont see much about grayromantics
@@rachaelmills4070 i honestly dont have any advice, sorry aagh, idk if you should tell them or not. logically you should but i know it would be hard.
Your heart loves him but ur brain dosent i think
That line "or im a healthy baby girl who traded sunshine for disease" Has my heart tho
It's so gentle and soft and feels so sweet
It reminds me of Nirvana's lyrics
Yes..so true
Yo unrelated but I love your pfp!
@@WasThatACanonEvent ty
depressing songs need to stop being so relatable or i need to go see a therapist
//ayo this comment blew up jeez, just a disclaimer I /am/ in therapy and even was during the time I was writing this! Please, if you are struggling with anything, I do suggest it! Stay safe everyone
Go to therapy, find a way to work out the problems in your brain, find a way to feel better
This is a mood
@@sarahong9820 but therapy exspsnsive but song not
Sometimes I don't even realize the songs I relate to are depressing until I look at the comments-
Almost all the songs I relate to are sad/depressing 🙁
"or i'm a healthy baby girl who traded sunshine for disease" it's kind of sad that i relate to that on such a personal level. but i didn't trade in my sunshine, it was taken from me and replaced with anxiety disorders and depression, gender dysphoria and self-loathing. thanks, pops, leaving your "little girl" for six months and then coming back just to hurt her for everything she ever did was a great idea.
this comment, hits different.
This reminds me of a father leaving and I kinda relate to the fact that breakup songs hit differently when your father leaves and you are just waiting for him, especially when you're a child and too young to actually have romantic feelings.
god i relate so bad to you. the abandonment, mental illness, gender dysphoria, self-hatred. we're completely different people that are miles away from each other, but we're so alike at the same time...
anyway, i'm sorry for everything that happened to you. we both don't deserve this shit. hugs to you internet stranger
I don't understand that line what does it mean?
@@verdeamarillo4979 basically getting trauma (aka "disease") as a young child, and the trauma taking your happiness (aka "sunshine") away
she truly is lyrical genius
This song to me feels like someone who’s been hurt so bad that they’re terrified to love again- to be left/to leave again. Someone terrified so much about moving on and losing their identity that they’d rather be hung up over someone they don’t care about anymore than have the feeling and have to confront the fact that they’re alone.
Heh, couldn't be me 🙃
How much I'm relating to this song is not healthy
Same
What a fuckin mood
This song gives me "I want to go back to the friend who abused me for 2 years because I was the happiest with them and no one has ever cared about me as much as they did, and although hurt me, I still love them and I want to forget everything they did me and run back to their arms" vibes
Yes, I would always feel like choosing to be with her and being in pain because of her than being without her, but now she's kinda gone and I miss her, no matter how many tears I cried, I miss her
Wow, literally me but make it three years and I was the one that abused them without realizing it until it was too late.
Okay, that hit home a Lil too hard. Same here, but it was for 5 years.
Is that my quote
Thats... Oddly specific
I’m relating to this song too much
Same x'd
Yikes
Same!
Same :D
same
ITS MY MENTAL BREAKDOWN AND I GET TO CHOOSE THE SONG
edit: i hate this comment, go like the funnier comments.
YES ME TOO
YES.
hol up that hit a little too close to home
HSHSHSHSHS
I WAS JUST SCREAMING THIS IN MY HEAD ABOUT MUMFORD AND SONS AND THE FRONT BOTTOMS WHEN CLICKING THIS SONG
This song helps me cope with my mental health issues and I could not be more grateful.
Can you explain to me how it helped you cope? I don't necessarily understand /gen
@@kokoawolf7243 not them but, I've had the exact experience this artist went through, nasty breakup and the person meant the world to me, broke down all the time and let my resentment to life break me, hearing that same experience written and sung out better than I could ever mentally process it kinda put the puzzle pieces together and let me fix myself
That and it makes me know I'm not alone in these experiences
My best friend died in his sleep 2 weeks ago. I fell in love with him in high school, but he was gay and not into me (a girl) so we stayed friends, and it was wonderful, and were closer than ever for 6 years and then he just died all alone when I should have been there for him. He just turned 20, I'm only 3 months younger than him. I've never felt closer to another human soul than I have him, I have no luck in love, but at the end of the day I had him to fall back on when everything failed me. Now I'm really alone. I feel like I died when he did.
Ethan I'm so sorry I'm not being strong like you would have wanted....I'm no good without you. I'll keep living for you until I finally get to die. You were the kindest man I've ever known and you always deserved better. Your last word to me never should have been sorry, because the one at fault has always been me. I'll hug you as soon as my time comes...I love you dearly my friend....please be patient for me....I'm coming.
Hey, i hope you're doing better now, take care please
My best friend also died
Don’t kill yourself for him because if he was there he would want you to be happy
The way you write is just so beautiful. Just try to keep having fun in life, okay? Experiencing the good and the bad, and you'll get to say sorry
@@ruchi6168 doo doo fart
What happened to him ?? 🙁 to just die In his sleep like that..
why does everyone focus on self care when this song exists? it’s gorgeous and everyone just bullies penelope scott over self care. same goes for soap, lotta true crime and others, they’re brilliant
Lyrics:
I don't wanna feel better
No one's ever gonna love me like that again
I don't wanna get over you
I wanna sit with you in bed
I don't wanna feel better
I'd give anything to miss you again
I don't wanna get over it
I wanna get under it instead
A book sits on top of clean and messy blankets
On a bed that fucking creaks at night when I get in it late
And late at night I'm chugging gatorade
And someone's breaking up
And I crack up because I know I'll never know just what to say
I'm a communist a terrorist a MPDG thot
Or I'm a sad girl in a dorm room
Living out the shitty christian plot of
Twilight or the Bible or the Lover by Duras
Or I'm just really fucking selfish and really fucking lost
But someone loved me
Someone fucking loved me
Someone fucking loved me and I fucking loved them too
God dammit I was worth something
I fucking learned something
I had my cake
I ate it
It ate me too
And god no
I don't wanna feel better
I don't wanna feel better
I'd give anything to miss you again
I don't wanna get over it
I wanna rip it to shreds
We kept our liquor in a suitcase underneath my bed
And we drank it to go out or to stay in or to feel sad
But in a hot way in
A way I'll fucking never have again
The sun has begun to set
I'm a socialist Marxist libertarian slut
I am an awkward teenaged virgin
And I sorta kinda laugh a lot in bed
But other times I cry or don't make noise at all
I'd give my life to have a room that feels that small
Someone loved me
Someone fucking loved me
Someone fucking loved me I loved them too
God dammit I was worth something
I fucking earned something
I had a right to die a right to live and a right to choose too
And god no
Of course I don't wanna feel better
Can you fucking imagine
No one's ever gonna love me like that again
I don't wanna get over it
I wanna rip the stars to shreds
I don't wanna feel better
I mean of course it hurt
Of course it fucking hurt
It hurt like nothing in the world sometimes
And I was super scared
And we were all a train wreck but also somehow making it
I think I might've died there twice
And I would do it all again
I'm a nihilist a soldier an OCD machine
Or I'm a healthy baby girl who traded
Sunshine for disease
But when my head hit my cheap pillow
I could tell I had a heart
And I wanna tear this fascist milky way apart
Because someone loved me
Someone fucking loved me
On my filthy life I loved someone I barely knew
God dammit I was worth something
I fucking learned something
And it felt better in my mouth than fresh warm food
I guess I loved you
I guess I really loved you
On my filthy life I love someone I barely knew
And now you're over there
And I'm way over here
What am I gonna do
I don’t wanna feel better
No one’s ever gonna love me like that again
I don’t want to get over you
I wanna sit with you in bed
I don’t wanna feel better
(Btw before anyone starts commenting “it’s a lyric video” yes, I’m aware. I just find it easier to have all of the lyrics displayed at once like this and I thought it could be helpful for other people too)
@@mafuyussparkles7161 thx
@mafuyussparkles7161 I'm actually writing the lyrics down rn and this helped!! Tysm!
0:55 to 1:09 HITS DIFFERENT
Yes! I’ve been looking through the comments for someone to mention it
absolutely
FR
The organs in the back just gives a whole new meaning to this song for me , of not getting over grief but its not grief more like a indescribable feeling of hatred towards someone but its also directed at yourself
For me this represents the denial stage when you break up with someone and the feeling of not wanting to move on and just hold onto that relationship as long as you can cause it was amazing and gave you life for the first time in your whole existence.
Thats exactly it...
tw
2:31 & 3:01 reminds me of how i was groomed. i realized how i needed to let go bc its for the best, and it hurt me a lot. im glad i did that, im happier i am today than before.
I'm srry that happened to you
same here. it’s so hard to understand that it was wrong and i didn’t deserve that looking back because i was so in love with the person i thought i knew. its still hard trying to hate them, bc that younger version of myself in me loves them.
2:36-2:47 I relate with this part too much-
I hate him, I don't love them, I'm glad that i opened my eyes and saw that it wasn't healthy for my mental health
I had the love of my life..my self sabotage and mental health fucked it all up. I hurt them and they're gone..they're gone and I miss them
I hope you're doing okay! I can't imagine the kind of pain and resentment you feel. I hope you don't beat yourself up on your past mistakes too much. Try to focus on how to be better instead! Life is too short to live through your regrets. You probably already know this, but a reminder is always nice! Hope you have a lovely day, and i'm so sorry.
SAME
@@lereindeerkoifish6789 we're now sad buddies :P but in all seriousness I hope you're okay, I know how much it hurts :(
same here.
I feel this way too
as someone with religious trauma, the line "or a shady christian plot of twilight or the bible or the lover by duras" hits so fucking hard man
i went through a breakup just a month ago and i can relate to this song in full. also the communism part. definitely that part too.
HAHAHAHAH
Underrated comment
same but with marxist part LOL
yeah same w the socialism part lmao but I've never been in a relationship
am i the only one whos not depressed but just genuinely likes this song?
yes.
honestly? yeah probably
depression? someone’s not very good at analysing songs
I think so
Your the .1%
this song changed me in 2021, i was at my lowest point and i would blast this on repeat absolutely SOBBING..
real but not sobbing
This song feels like how you would feel like if you were in a really bad place in your life and there was only one person in your life and you felt like you loved them even though you didnt, you just saw them as a "savior" and when they left, you just felt like you faked it for attention.
Does that make sense
This is literally basically exactly my situation 0.0
@@arwen1746 i feel you home slice
sorta makes sense
That makes perfect sense bc that's literally my life
Oml that hit home- the first year of middle school I was a happy normal girl but things slowly started changing and while I still had my friend group I felt so alone, I had very few classes with them and ig that’s what made me feel alone. Exept I had my best friend . I saw her as my savior because I was so close to ending my life but she was what made it better. If it wasn’t for her I think I would have been dead by now. But for high school I had to go to a different school. It’s hell all over again and the thoughts keep coming back. I want to talk to her more but I don’t want to be annoying. During my freshman year that was online cuz of covid I started thinking I had a thing for her and cried myself to sleep because I missed my chance. She now has someone she loves very much and I’m happy for her, I really am I just regret not telling her while I had the chance.
" i was worth something" line hits hard
I dont wanna feel better either
no cuz the “and now you’re over there and i’m way over here” line just hits hard bruv
This song feels like the fear of moving on but because you know you’ll never feel that way for anyone else again
I know it's technically about a romance, but this song reminds me so much of my friend. We stopped talking almost a year ago because I was a selfish jerk and unnecessary rude to her sometimes and she didn't deserve any of it. I missed her more than anything and I tried every day to be a better person. She recently reached out to me and said she had loved me and had really missed me. I proposed starting all over again, but I feel like she kind of lost interest in me because a lot of time has passed. I still love her and I can't stand losing her for the second time, but I fear that's what's going to happen and that's why I'm writing this at 3 am basically to a void, because no one is going to read that comment, but I need to tell that story to someone. 😭
Hey, I’m really sorry that this is happening to you. I don’t have any advice or anything, but if you want to talk, there’s plenty of people here for you (including me)
sorry for saying this, or be this kind of person, but this is like my situation right now, i feel so shit about myself rn :(
this is the same as me too :(, i had this friend (which is my classmate) and we were very close before, we also stopped talking almost a year ago too because i think her dad didnt want me to talk again anymore with her. i was also a selfish jerk and was also unnecessary being rude to her. i feel so bad and i wanted to be a better person too everyday. she never deserved any of it too, i feel such an awful person of how i treated her before. she did reached out to me a year ago and she told me that she's back, but then she never texted me again or reply to my messages. i miss her so much, and i dont wanna lose her too :( i still love her so much no matter what. i can never move on because i miss her so much.
I hope that after a year yours relationship improved with them
penelope scott is really good at creating chaos that makes sense
catra energy right now
yes
PLS
Wait omg yes
@@francisshmancis4695 yes catra
Oh god, yes! ~
I'm crying and this song somehow helps me feel better? lol love it tho
hope ur better now
How much I relate to this song is honestly unhealthy 🥲👍
Misa pfp supremacy 🙏
Also hope you’re doing ok :)
I hope you feel better
The “I just want feel something again” song
I'm a nihilist a soldier an OCD machine
Or I'm a healthy baby girl who traded
Sunshine for disease
But when my head hit my cheap pillow
I could tell I had a heart
And I wanna tear this fascist milky way apart
These songs are so sad if u just listen and that's why I like them
TRIGGER HAPPY HAVOC SPOILERS!!!!
this song is just like aoi, when sakura dies:(
OH. OH MY GOD IT IS. WHAT THE FUCK.
currently: cryingz
Woah suddenly I'm crying
Wow I am crying even more now
@@Sillygoofy.. DONT CYR PLEASEE
people are using this song to show off their cute relationships on tik tok😭😭✨
Nooooooooo lmao
Plssss
Lucky bastards
I cant even 😭
@@sergentsnugglemuffin1543 LMAO
At 0:39 seconds, when she said ‘and late at night I’m chugging Gatorade’ I ALMOST CHOKED BECAUSE I WAS ACTUALLY DRINKING GATORADE WHILE LISTENING TO THIS 😭😂
I'm listening to this song the day after my girlfriend broke up with me
Turns out she was using me to get to her homophobic mom
Literally just broke up last night bc we cant agree that 17/19 is a safe age gap. H.
Smar
broke up with my ex cause he was homophobic and racist 👹
I'm so sorry
@@TheRadical0ne I would say if the 17 year old is mental mature enough then yes although in some places it is illegal
Am I the only one that really vibes with “I wanna rip the stars to shreds”?
Your not alone girl 😔✌️
This also has Catra to Adora energy
Wait yes tho
@@francisshmancis4695 how u replying to every she ra comment
@@accountoutofuse971 I’m just built different
YES OMG
I get that
My Music teacher: what kinda music do you like?
Me:
Its complicated. Basically penelope scott.
this hits different when your in a messy long distance relationship
leave love
its long distance just block them and its done
@@kestalami it’s not that easy but okay
heart hurting long distance where u only see each other once a month and he’s a lot older than u 😁😛💕❣️
@@riyahanderson it really is.
Felt
This song reminds me of "they fell in love first but I fell in love late" vibes
I don't wanna feel better
No one's ever gonna love me like that again
I don't wanna get over you
I wanna sit with you in bed
I don't wanna feel better
I'd give anything to miss you again
I don't wanna get over it
I wanna get under it instead
A book sits on top of clean and messy blankets
On a bed that fucking creaks at night when I get in it late
And late at night I'm chugging gatorade
And someone's breaking up
And I crack up because I know I'll never know just what to say
I'm a communist a terrorist a MPDG thot
Or I'm a sad girl in a dorm room
Living out the shitty christian plot of
Twilight or the Bible or the Lover by Duras
Or I'm just really fucking selfish and really fucking lost
But someone loved me
Someone fucking loved me
Someone fucking loved me and I fucking loved them too
God dammit I was worth something
I fucking learned something
I had my cake
I ate it
It ate me too
And god no
I don't wanna feel better
I don't wanna feel better
I'd give anything to miss you again
I don't wanna get over it
I wanna rip it to shreds
We kept our liquor in a suitcase underneath my bed
And we drank it to go out or to stay in or to feel sad
But in a hot way in
A way I'll fucking never have again
The sun has begun to set
I'm a socialist Marxist libertarian slut
I am an awkward teenaged virgin
And I sorta kinda laugh a lot in bed
But other times I cry or don't make noise at all
I'd give my life to have a room that feels that small
Someone loved me
Someone fucking loved me
Someone fucking loved me I loved them too
God dammit I was worth something
I fucking earned something
I had a right to die a right to live and a right to choose too
And god no
Of course I don't wanna feel better
Can you fucking imagine
No one's ever gonna love me like that again
I don't wanna get over it
I wanna rip the stars to shreds
I don't wanna feel better
I mean of course it hurt
Of course it fucking hurt
It hurt like nothing in the world sometimes
And I was super scared
And we were all a train wreck but also somehow making it
I think I might've died there twice
And I would do it all again
I'm a nihilist a soldier an OCD machine
Or I'm a healthy baby girl who traded
Sunshine for disease
But when my head hit my cheap pillow
I could tell I had a heart
And I wanna tear this fascist milky way apart
Because someone loved me
Someone fucking loved me
On my filthy life I loved someone I barely knew
God dammit I was worth something
I fucking learned something
And it felt better in my mouth than fresh warm food
I guess I loved you
I guess I really loved you
On my filthy life I love someone I barely knew
And now you're over there
And I'm way over here
What am I gonna do
Thanks but it's a lyric video my guy
@@Jordinmeyers i know , i just posted it for the people that needed the copy paste or smth
@@hallfdead oh cool lol I didnt even think of that thanks
@@Jordinmeyers dw man have a great day/night !!
@@hallfdead you too!
The feeling or regret. Letting them go. Being scared you'll never feel again. Explaining how you are feeling to them and accidently saying how you feel for them in the middle of it. Ah so many mixed emotions.
Something about this song speaks to me so much. It might be the over angry opening switches to a numbness like a mask falling, or it might be laughing at the idea of feeling better. But man does this encompass my mental state
Punks not dead. It's just stuck inside and hasn't had a haircut in nine months and has to drive for door dash after work to make rent some times.
This ^^ would make some lovely song lyrics bestie
ayo should i make a song with that in it 👀 i'm an aspiring song writer and i already have an idea in my head
@@idontusethischannelanymore9825 Y E S
you know when you finally open up to someone and trust them to love you unconditionally like they promised, you trust them to not abandon you like they *promised* and the moment you let them in and finally feel safe and happy for once in your pathetic life they fuck you over and get mad when you snap because everything you ever loved is crumbling down around you at once and you cant do anything to hold the pieces together? yeah.
now this is a song to cry in the shower to
I like this song.
Tw: vent.
It reminds me about my ex girlfriend who I had to ghost because my mom didn’t approve of me being lgbt.
Ever since that life has gone downhill all throughout my family.
I don’t wanna get better though. It costs too much for therapy and the only comfort I have is sleeping.
I always spent my nights like Penelope described. Laying down in my own sorrow while chugging down Gatorade since I’m a minor and I can’t drink.
I just wish things couldn’t have ended up like this.
Your mum is based
I hope your okay now
why did you ghost her chile
@@amor7886 Did you not read the rest of the comment?
@@KentuckyFriedFlint u ain’t have to ghost her cus of that 🤡🤡
i can’t not imagine Marceline singing this after Woke Up when she broke up with PB
“i had my cake and i ate it and it ate me too”
*L LAWLIET*
HOLY SHIT
I love ryu 😔
Still sad that L is dead...
This song reminds me of when you build your whole life around a specific person and give up everything like your relationships with friends or family to make them happier and then not knowing what to do after that relationship fails because you didn't have much going for you other than that one relationship.
By unhealthy relationship I mean platonic ones too btw. I see a lot of people talk about unhealthy romantic relationships, but not too many people talking about unhealthy friendships which can be just as draining and horrible.
I found this like yesterday and i freaking love it
same :0
i’m not really a big fan of this style but that “and it ate me too” is so good
I assume y’all came here for 0:52
*y e s*
Maybe🤭
Nahh
That part reminds me so much of some 2010's online alt song and I can't find the one I'm thinking about anywhere
I'm in love with this song
head go brrr
0:31 is my fav part
This song hits so different when you've gone through a breakup you know that you were the exact reason of.
Everyone’s talking about how this song reminds them of a break up but this song reminds me of my father. Sometimes I feel like he was the only person who actually cared for me. He’s the reason I got into art too. He used to bring paints everyday for me. And I don’t want to ever get over missing him because I don’t want to forget him.
THE START THOUGH OML
I LOVE THIS SONG SOOOOO MUCHHHHHHH
I CANT EXPRESS MY LOVE FOR IT
ugh same
Yeah it’s the “On my filthy life I loved someone I barely knew” for me🥰💔
I hate the only girl I've loved.
Same
I can't even hate her
@@TheRadical0ne why?
@@Marshall.The.Goob. We broke up on Monday but tbh I still love and adore her too much to hate her or even be mad oof
@@TheRadical0ne That sucks, man. I went through the same. Maybe don't get back together. More often than not it doesn't work out. But that's just a suggestion
BROOO a ad came up and its couples therapy 💀💀💀💀😂😂😂
This gives off the vibe of like ''I'm on the verge of dying but I'm so emotionally attached to someone who I know doesn't likes me back, but I still just can't get over them so I'm trying my best not to give up rn''
You just described my entire existence
This song feels falling in love at a young age and now you rely on them to keep alive
Not me 🙃
She was the perfect person for me, I was so far from perfect for her. I miss her, I dont wanna feel better
Same, but I hope it gets better for us.
apparently regarding this song (according to genius lyrics) penelope said “summer was hard on us all” and DAMN that hit hard. i want this summer back
“I was worth something”-bruh THAT hits hard
For me this song is about being obsessed with fictional characters to the point you can't spend a day without daydreaming about them and not wanting to stop because that is the only thing that keeps you moving
“i don’t wanna get over it, i wanna get under it instead”
oh that hits hard
the lyrics are SO FUCKING HARD TO MEMORIZE IM DYING
or Im stupid
same
Or both 🤔
Sameee
nah it's just fast paced lol
2:21 I wish this part lasted longer
I don’t like listening to super depressing songs like this bc they make me feel even worse
Me too
but I don’t wanna feel better
Sorry I’ll leave
But I don’t want to feel better
I think that might be why I listen to them
I’m the opposite, whenever I’m sad listening to depressing songs makes me feel better for some weird reason lol
me either. and yet we're both here
“On my filthy life i loved someone i barely knew” this lyric always reminds me of the time i got into a fight with my online friend and stopped talking only for me to realise he wasn’t the person i though he was and i just made a fake impression of him just because i liked him.
I can really relate to this song because my dad used to frequently manipulate me and then he left and never came back,
My mother never really comforted me, she just kinds said something along the lines of "some people have it worse than you."or "get over it, your a big boy" and I never really had a childhood
No one can convince me that it WASNT Marceline the Vampire Queen who wrote this
Ngl I miss dancing with strangers at concerts
“I had my cake, I ate it, it ate me too”
Why is no one talking about this
I peirced my ears while having a breakdown to this song lmao
I thought it was love, but it wasn't. It was a feeling of attachment for the first person who didn't ignore or hate me
1:53
This feels like the place to vent, so
I don’t know, I just can’t believe someone loved me. 🙁
And I ruined everything, and it’s all my fault. I don’t even know who’s right or wrong anymore, all I know is that I started this, and it’s all my fault, I was so blind snd stupid and naive, I’m so angry, I only noticed the red flags when it was too late. And now, I’ve ruined everything. And the worst part is they loved **me.** Just me for me. Or maybe they didn’t, I don’t even know anymore.
I haven’t been in a relationship or even close to being in one but i still cry while listening to this song.
this song doesn't have to be ab romantic relationships imo
this song is literally my maladaptive daydreams of me and my boyfriend being toxic and breaking up and its perfect
the way i relate to this song so much is fucking concerning-
Do you guys get that feeling where your not sad all the time but every like once a week, you face the fact that even if you ingore it, your still gonna be very very sad deep down no matter what you do
Yes, but I promise I gets better!!!!
@@lexiawoods4593 when? Because it's been years.
2:10 i’m absolutely in love with this part i cannot express it omg
you mean 2:04
@@MK-bo5ug nope