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Ari Shaffir - Tattletale - This Is Not Happening - Uncensored
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- Опубликовано: 1 мар 2015
- When an old classmate asks Ari Shaffir for a favor, he thinks back to how she treated him in high school before answering.
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I’ve literally been watching these for 8hrs today
Random same 😂
It’s like a full time job at this point
Fax
Same and I have work in 20 mins
Same
"Calm down, it's not a Catholic school." That shit got me man lol
At least catholics dont bite the foreskin off their babies.
Declan Bergin sick burn.
Still odd to make a child kneel before a grown man. Regardless of which book they read
lol dude amazing
Her name is Bernice Weigert... I guess googled the closest name sounding like ‘Bernice Wai-Gurt’ and I saw his tweet, was rather proud of my lip reading skills 😂
You are a SOLDIER
her facebook post still exists too lol
Tech Time thank you detective
Tech Time I thought he was saying Brittany Swanson lol
I thought he said Hugh Janus
I thought he said Steve
"Be Morm- Don't be Mormon, obviously."
I'm a Mormon, and this made me laugh.
Oh yeah, definitely don't be Mormon
@Forrest Robles most mormons are nice until you diss their beliefs, in my experience
Ari is one funny SOB, he really stepped up his game in the last few years.
@Brownbeartmb comprehension is key
@@guard509 joke
Brownbeartmb not much of a sense of humour for a fan of comedy 🤨
for real dude. totally right
That's a level of pettiness that I struggle with daily trying to control.
That's sad
Same here. As long as you don't let it overcome you, you'll be fine.
"Uncensored"
*Censors the girls name hundreds of times*
😂😂😂😂😂
Nick Corso they’re not tryna get sued
Came here to say that lol
@@dionysusfall2738 man everyone gets sued who the fuck cares anymore
@@dionysusfall2738 Isn't that ALWAYS the case when someone censores it's own contents?!
Peter Müller no, sometimes it’s just for monetary reasons (like censoring curse words for advertisers)
damn it! He mentioned his twitter followers, so i immediately went to check how many, and subsequently followed him.
then it hit me.. that was just him promoting his twitter.
You win
How did you not see that coming? I mean he mentioned that he's a jew at least 50 times.
Damn bro you're very easily influenced lmao I hope within the last 4 years you tightened up and worked that issue out
This has been the best past year for reading old RUclips comments
yep. _100%_ true dude
We had a teacher who was really proud he was getting his doctorate. Being middle school kids from lower middle class families we had no idea what that meant; we thought he was studying to be a doctor. So we said cool. You're gonna be a doctor - what kind. He replied, condescension dripping off him, NO, not a doctor, a doctorate. And that was the moment. We spent the time till he quit calling him doctor sarcastically. He didn't last long. Thinking back now, we were awful. And to get your PhD while working... Respect. Still...he was a condescending prick. So.
Ari's getting really really good lately. I've been a fan for years and this is the funniest I've seen him.
It's great to a see a comic you really enjoy just crushing it.
Lol he lost some fans since then
@@stevenobrien557None of those were real fans you dork, and since you made your comment Ari released one of the best specials ever.
Kobe!
i thought he said Bittney Spears at first lol
This was great! I love how he described all the student's non verbally agreeing to destroy the teacher.
Don’t worry, It’s a Jewish school, not a Catholic school...Friggin hilarious!
This is the next level of petty right here and I love it
“It’s not a catholic school”
I love you Ari! I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.
Is there any way to hear the real version??
Ari: " After many long years....finally: *Vengeance* "
I’ve been watching ari the whole day on my acid trip. He’s my jewish icon now
Jesse lol go outdoors. Ari is amazing but you need to be in nature
did you at least hang out with nature bro? i cant enjoy a trip without hanging out with my favorite tree and giving it a hug
What a waste of acid
Rocking some knees at 13. Dude is so funny. Its not a Catholic school, its a Jewish school. Had me rolling. Was fun to watch. Great video
Intro is vaguely Aphex Twin's "Come to Daddy"
Hey, Tristan Stiles.. You tattled on me in 5th grade & I didn't get recess that day. Lmao.
#Nevarforget
Jaseeka Rawr daaaaaaaaamn
Keisha Martin sucker punched me in the face when I was a freshman in high school. 15yrs later she friend requests me on Facebook. . Still looking like Mike Tyson
Never not nevar
That's nothing. Billy Ledlow stole a whole bag of piries that my crush had just given me right out of my coat pocket, and to this day I would still cheerfully punch the smirk off his face. It happened in third grade--in 1971.
Matthew White threw an english book at my face in 7th grade, so I punched him and got called away from my lunch and got detention for defending myself.
2019 binging Ari, Joey Diaz and Joe Rohan you fall down a hole lol I can’t get enough of these guys!! 💓
Brooklyn Schoor 3 at a time, as usual for you!
Nathan Dufresne 💁🏼 how would you know ?
Brooklyn Schoor dang, shots being fired!
Who’s your favorite?
Kyler Michael I think Joe because he has this awesome podcast that I can’t get enough of but when I do found stuff from Ari I obsess, he just doesn’t have enough material out there.
Ari is without a doubt in my top 5 favorite comedians.
Isn't this supposed to be uncensored? :O
You can't really put someone on blast like that.
*****
So wait? You both went to the same high school?
***** nice try haha
***** All Jewish school my ass!
***** Garm Campoli That is totally fine then, sorry I misunderstood the bleepings! Love the stand up btw!
Hahaha epic ending, loved it
The tradition joke was great , I can’t believe they didn’t think it was funny . Lmao 😂 wrong crowd I guess, buncha softies
The line driver ad at the beginning was so good holy shit
I really like these stories.
I love Ari's raw ruthless style! 23 years too late, lol.
Replace the beeps with Bernice Weigert and you'll be fine. Not a joke. There was a point when one of the videos of this had kept her name in.
Ok, but who cares? Its a stranger
Omg this was making me lol!!
Ari always has the best in my opinion
I like the Aphex Twin-esque intro.
all the intros are like HBO movie series quality. Gotta love it!
fuck yes I was looking for this comment
This one was pretty damn funny, I think one of the funniest one along with ralphie's gay wedding
The silent hand gesture hahaha
Yes. Yes. Let the hate flow through you. Someone said something about someone you like..... Yessssss hate is the source of my life force. Feeeed me
Holy shit, I had a history teacher named Mr. Sager, but he was that one teacher everyone liked. Guy was wierd as all shit, bit of a hipster, but pretty cool.
Christopher Cano OK THANK
Same here. English\history
My Sager also just got fucked with, he taught health and for sex question friday (don't ask me why the fuck that was a thing in middle school health) we asked the wackest shit. My girlfriend at the time deadass asked him "so how does anal feel good"
haha. its not a catholic school....hilarious.
Miss gardener. Biology teacher. All the kids laughed and cheered when she fell down the stairs and broke her arm. It was actually pretty dark
Hahahaha! I love this show ! Almost all the guests/comics are Great ! AND the intros at the start RULE BIG TIME .!!! 👽🖕🏻👾🎶🧟♀️🏄🏻♂️🤙🏻😂🕺🤖
This teacher actually quit in elementary school lmao. Not my class but one of the classes would clown so hard on him. I was actually nice to himm tho. Lmao he was a good teacher tbh
Man I remember that teacher who everyone fucked with. I feel so bad for him now that I'm older, guy got so much shit for no reason at all.
Ch0plol some of those teachers were just cock suckers who brought it upon themselves lol
awesome story. ari is so good.
I loved that he used dwarfs in the intro😂
How in the world do you feel obligated to take a stranger somewhere vs your best friend? How weird. 😂 Its a hell no for me!
Fucks yea! A new comedian just got bumped up to my top 5 comedy legends
+Don Figga type in amazing racist on RUclips search and you would blow off your head when you see the results
So who got bumped down?
"not sexually, you guys..this was not catholic school.." omigoooood 😂😂😂
Ive been watching everything Ari Shaffir this week. Started at Bobby Lee ended up here lol
Joe Rogan brought me here!
"I was watching legalization videos yeah it's just a plant "
This is one of his very few clips where he doesn't mention drugs at all.
i love this man!
That’s such a good way to handle that though, I actually learned something from this. Think back to when you knew them and decide if you would’ve done it back then.
Loved the jab at catholicism.
(I'm Catholic...but its still funny)
***** lol. What?
Larry Jarrins who cares
Not gonna abandon my beliefs. And no one cares. Just wanted to say my opinion
Larry Jarrins
Ahh, bummer.
Dylan Brannon Just wished he didn't drag out the joke until only two people were laughing out of obligation.
the name censor made me laugh hard cause if im not mistaken in the first season of this Ari talked about losing his virginity and at first the name was not censored onl youtube and magically one day it was i assume somthing really shitty happend.
Honestly i would watch a bunch of short films of the intros alone... I.... would... pay for it.
F yeah ive been for three weeks cut out music and. I smile now
I was surprised when i seen this guy was still alive - He used to go by the name "The Amazing Racist" and the things this guy did was unbelievable- I'm just surprised he never got shot
Masser Phi those were skits for a comedy show, they are all actors
Masser Phi Oh shit, I was like he looks familiar I didn't remember it was him, The one where he takes his KKK uniform to a black owned dry cleaners was hillarious
Nice Aphex Twin intro ;)
it's not actually aphex twin it's just that the intro is similar to aphex twins video for 'come to daddy'
+Jakob Johnson The track is "Run The Jewels" by Run the Jewels.
finally a good intro
I looked down at the video title after the opening and thought ''For sure I'm not going to see the word 'uncensored''', and then I did....
the intro's are the best. that team should do intro's for every single show ever
I thought it was UNCENSORED...
haha nicee
Guess they cut that out on TV...Like one time I was at an Army-Navy football game, and they did a halftime dedication to Ronald Reagan's 100th birthday. They talked about how crappy Obama is doing, so I figured that's why it was hidden from home watchers. I know they cut it out because my family was watching from home.
they are censoring a name.
Julius Sprouse
so its CENSORED then!
No... "censoring" is referenced to the removal of un-PC words n' that.
Taking out the name of an non-fictional person has to do with a much greater law of CIVIL LIBERTIES and protecting the person talking from a very viable lawsuit for defamation of character.
There is a huge difference. this is not censored.
The beginning of this video reminds me of come to daddy by aphex twin lmao
It's totally trending HAHA!
How'd he do that thing with his voice everytime he said her name? That was pretty fuckin awesome, why is no one talking about that?
i love this series, but the intro on this episode.... aphex / chris cunningham much?
Apart from the shockingly crap music
I enjoy the Chris Cunningham & Aphex Twin reference in the intro.
i rewatch this like once a year and die every time.
1 year anniversary of your comment, how’s your yearly watch?
The INTRO...Aphex Twin - Come To Daddy
Ari with the mohawk makes him look 20 years younger
I watch theese every night
Bring back Ari!!!
Imagine he was still bitter after 22 years 😂
Felecia whitehurst?
They bleeped it every fucking time haha! 😂🤣
Ari Shaffir is awesome
Bernice weigert
anyone read lips?
amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing
okay Ari. youve been gone long enough,..you can come back now.
Uncensored but i still can't hear BEEP BEEEPS name...
thats a legal thing..
john smith sounds like Pussy Swinger
It’s Amy Schumer
Toni Shmony no its not
Is this really the level of stupidity you want to be known for? Really?
Ari, ur too much; be.. Protestant, be ... Mormon, well No Don't be Mormons. i did cringe when i heard you say Mormon, Naw Bro!
OMG, my junior high had the same rule about skirt lengths, if you were kneeling and your hem didn't touch the floor your skirt was too short. Looking back on that I can't believe we didn't think this was wrong, it was embarrassing, but we didn't think it was wrong. And this was a public school!!!
Haha I did that to the bus driver from the back of the bus😂
Great story but shitty censoring on a fucking RUclips video.
It wouldnt be right for him to say the person's actual name so trolls can ruin their life.
Sean Thompson he wasn't saying her name. I think he was saying "pussy cunt" or something.
Uncensored my ass
Well they don't want the girls name to be out there for everyone
as in cussing, as opposed to privacy.
I didn't realize he was saying her name in it. I thought he was just calling her a curse word
Hermann TheGerman Ya, it says hide your mom is in extremely mature humor, and stuff you won't want your mom to hear.
Darin Black you're an idiot
"Uncensored" Bleeps a billion fucking times
Ari Shaffir well on his way to being one of the best!!!
fucking love This Is Not Happening.
I'll give it a 6/10, it was ok, but not very funny.
Jared Greenwald Sir Atrophied Nuts, we understand that it's a story. Did you realize it was a story that deserved 1 minute of attention and had 7 minutes of Jew humor sandwiched in? 6/10 is being nice, this shit was a waste of time.
Cody Riggle You good sir speak my mind.
well clearly the majority of the people who watched this disagree with you, so maybe it's your own problem
*Opinion
That is pretty much the story of all his comedy.
OK, not great.
whats with all the christian hate lately
***** He's trying to be funny and failing. I know he wants to have a reputation for being un-PC and making comments that piss people off, but his anti-Catholic stuff is not not accurate, original or creative... and it doesn't get laughs.
Uhm? Might be all thr child rape? Sorry, I meant gay child rape.
If it isnt that.. it could also be thr arguing against condoms in aids infested areas?
sparklemotion101 It’s not much compared to the mass genocide in your bible
This joke in particular was for catholics more than other christianity
YESS!
Great comedian not afraid that koby stuff made me look him up where do I buy tickets
I have an addiction to "this is not happening" ......
At least someone else introduced him this time.
I had a similar situation happen to me, about the same age. There was no blood involved and it was with a blunt object, me and a friend were tossing back and forth. When, the teach kinda crossed in the path while starting the class. I got kicked out of school but it was the last week anyways.
Ari is the best host
The Joe Rogan podcast brought me here. Definitely gonna continue This is not Happening 🔥😂
We did this win subs lol
The dude at 4:59 on the left in the back looks so stoned!
I like the comedy.