Great video, I would say I fit the stereotype I lost a marriage was suffering chronic ptsd from work, medically discharged and hit Thailand in my 60"s with money and no job... I wouldn't say I lost the lot but would say for 3 years spent alot and learnt alot, I did spread the love thou... Built a bar, had alot of fun but now know it was straight out escapism... I wasn't a big drinker but could binge... No real regrets but I was generous... The bar actually saved me as I got to look at guys and what they were doing... I sold the bar before covid hit made a profit and had lived off it... I went back and forth home alot... I've never thought of living perm in Thailand...I love Thai women... Suggestions would be with girls, under promise over deliver...realise a girl who has worked in bars awhile basically is a charming liar... And always get a hotel with a good mirror... Most of us are not that handsome just too nice...
Some great advice! You and I have chatted previously in an email about our similar circumstances so I’ll leave that there and for when we hopefully catch up for a beer. What I would say though is if I ever got divorced from my wife (Aussie), I can’t ever see myself living with another woman again. I’d quite happily get myself a condo and enjoy my own company and float like a butterfly when the need arises.
Hey Trev, gotta say that’s one of the best vids you’ve done and the takes on the possible situations that many may experience…and absolutely appreciate your personal story, the ups and downs…and history and your perspective on these issues. I’ve a few mates that have lost a lot, some that are totally happy…some mates have been in Thai for 18-20 years plus…and I’ve learnt a lot from them, and relatively financially untouched…thankfully. I’ve too much to say right here and will talk more in discord, and a few stories for Peter too. Thanks mate for your honesty and telling it the way it is ! Happy New Year mate 🇦🇺🙏👍🍻
Agreed Peter! It's funny, but this subject, with your car crash stories (Thailand Bound anyone!? 😉) and all the rest of it never fail to entertain and be popular. What does that tell us? Lol! I think you could create a channel that deals in nothing but this subject and you'd be onto a winner. I mean, just look through the posts and replies to this video.... Mmm, now there's an idea....... 🤣🤣🙂👍😉❤
Thanks Trevor, One of your best videos IMO. Spot on with what you said, i have been there , done and got the bloody T shirt. Over 20 years and i haven't really learnt much, except how to speak Thai. Not prepared to reveal more as yet, but maybe later!
Thanks for opening up with all your personal details. I have followed you from the beginning and still learned some new things about you today. If you save one poor guy from losing everything, it’s well worth it.
Here's the real root of the problem: that first time you meet a woman who pays attention to you. If you're a guy whose lived in a typical western country, you might be 30, 40, 50 years old, and that Thai woman, in a beer bar, is the first woman in your entire life whose ever smiled when you spoke to her, paid attention to you, and actually seemed interested in you (that "first woman" often includes your own mother). She's put in no effort at all, but it's so much more effort than you've ever received before. Men are completely unprepared for how to handle that. In your home country, you've been a dog all your life who hasn't gotten a single table scrap, now, you're at the table eating the full course meal. It's not fair to expect a man to make rational decisions in that situation. Men need to trained for this stuff. Once you learn that it is what it is, you can go to Thailand, have a wonderful trip, have a lot of fun, and come back home relaxed, re-energized and refreshed. Just be sure that Thai girl doesn't have your phone number, and that you don't have her's, and never call her again.
@@SuperSupersoda you're letting the guys off the hook too easy. if you've never gotten attention your entire life even from average looking women, why are attractive thai bar girls treating you so differently ("handsome man," "love you"). other guys warn you and there are so many youtube videos on these scams. it's because you want to believe in the fantasy. I thought men are the rational sex. if you're not popular back home, the odds are extremely low her feelings for you are genuine.
A friend of mine (from the UK) had an attractive bar-girl girlfriend who he shared ownership in a bar and a house. At first everything was great and the bar was making money. However, they began to quarrel and she kicked him out of the house and took over his bar. He lost everything money-wise and was reduced to being a bum sleeping on the Pattaya beach. A few years later, he was able to move back to the UK (just much poorer and and in bad health). His girlfriend legally owned the house and land in Thailand (foreigners can't own Thai land). She also had multiple well-off sponsors, who she got while being legally married to him. Whenever I think of retiring in Thailand, I think of my UK friend and his negative experiences. I hope this never happens to me.
Of all them, this is still the best one you've ever done Trev. What great advice and put as though you're a best friend who's advice you respect, value and can trust. Thank you.
Be very very careful mate. Enjoy yourself but keep your wits about you . Truest thing someone said to me was Thailand can be heaven but can be hell as well , and don't get oneitis there are thousands of girls there don't get fixated on one .
@@NicolaSturgeon-pl4bs well thanks but I still haven’t made it to Thailand. I ended up going to Vietnam instead last April because of the 5 day test rule that was still enforced in Thailand. Then , last month, I chose to go on Safari in Tanzania instead of going to Thailand again. But, next April may actually make it there… or India…I want to do the Delhi-Agra-Jaipur triangle…I’ll get there eventually.
This video is gold, might be the most important one on your channel. That's literally the most important things to be aware of before coming. Thanks for being honest and sharing your story. It's easy to get tricked believing "I am different" or "she is different". You should do this type of content more, might save lots of people from making mistakes that could be avoided. Everyone will have better experiences if they have the right expectations.
Excellent video Trev and pertinent content for anyone visiting Thailand. Funnily enough, I have been speaking to a few Thai ladies from TF. Met a few lovely women on there with normal jobs and businesses in some cases. However, there one lady who’s a primary school teacher and every conversation seems to be geared towards how much she struggles, and implied requests for support. I normally brush it off with empathy and kind words. Two weeks ago I finally relented and sent her 6000 as a Xmas gift, low and behold, two days later it’s all spent and the guilt trip starts again. Now, not five minutes ago, her grandad has died and she needs 3000 to visit him in another province. Suffice to say I said no, and won’t be continuing our chats anymore. Short term pain has given me long term gain in her case. It’s so easy to be sucked in to their lies and half truths. It’s another lesson from the LOS.
@@Buzzinpattaya I’m more amazed that you’ve taken the time to personally reply to nearly 900 massages. Even the trolls get a lol 😂 looking forward to your New Years chat about the lessons you’ve learnt on RUclips. I’ll definitely buy you a beer when I visit in February, and that’s a rarity from a yid to a gooner. Lol
Your advice is always on the money. Great content. Your forthrightness and talking from the heart are a gem. Keep it up and for those who are going through a tough time in the name of love, just keep your head up and hopefully you will pull through soonest.
Probably your best ever video ! Personally very relevant (I'm at the do I stay or go bit). Your honesty and concern for others shines through. If you're a caring person it's easy to understand how the " jumpers" get to the point of no return.
Fair play. Im sure it was heard to admit your mistakes. As a fellow Thai fan, I feel your pain mate. Glad to hear you've now found a good one. Good luck
Thank you for sharing this so someone else doesn’t have trouble. That took a lot of courage. Please have more stuff like this. Your helping people avoid trouble, and may save a life or two.
I agree with what you say and it is one of your best videos. I have fortunately always kept what money I have from women by being hard hearted. Always polite but firm. I don't need to be rich just comfortable. Also being a life long bachelor suits me. Little pressure to please anyone but myself
Cheer's Trev. That has been real good advice. I'm in that category where i fall soft with women, and even more so if i was in Thailand. Excellent video.
Well done Trevor, been there etc, fortunately only a few thousand pounds in my case before I saw the light. At least I had ball for 18 months. Your best video to date. Best of luck for 2022, especially with the bar.
Trevor mate, have to say, been an advid follower, I look forward to all your live streams, but I want to highlight this stream, this has been your best stream, in my opinion, your a top man Trev....
Wow. I admire your honesty in a attempt to help other people avoid finding themselves in the same situation you were in. Kudos to you and glad that things turned around for you.
Appreciate all the information helps everyone here to be that little bit wiser and if it saves just one guy losing everything was well worth the effort you put in.
Great video Trev. Very informative and well said. It’s very easy to fall in love and let your guard down in Pattaya and most places in SE Asia the same. Take care!
Good work Trev. It's so easy to be sucked into the sick buffalo syndrome. I'm married to a Thai lady 24 years my junior. We moved to the UK where we are now happily separated. She's still rinsing me, I just paid for part 3 of her UK visa! Why? She is the mother of my daughter and she cooks a great Tom Yum. No fool like an old fool.
I learned similar things from a relationship with a Canadian women from Vancouver. I’m red pill now and can say he is absolutely right. NEVER let your guard down. Not here, not back home, not ANYWHERE!!! The only person that matters is YOU!
Great and well balanced video. The proof of this is how it has made me think and see how i do thinks wrong. But on the flip side your thoughts make me see that there is a great life to be found here. Well done sir!
What a great straight chat !! You have said the truth and the truth hurts !!! . Hopefully it has made a lot of men think about the year ahead ! . ( maybe better to lose a little !! Then lose it all !! The truth in a few words !!) . Well done 👍 on a great chat !!
Bro this is a great vid.. Ive been to Thailand many times and one of the last times there I got scammed in Patong. I met a girl online as I like to have a GF experience whenever I would come to Thailand and she got me.. Half way thru my holiday she went crazy. She wouldn't leave me alone I ended up having to pay her 30k baht just to leave me alone and I had to change locations of where I was living at that time because she was still calling my phone and acting crazy.. Many guys get got but I still love Thailand but I now have my head on straight when dealing with the girls.. I even had a girl fight another girl in Pataya.. Its crazy out there but I still love it.. Thanks for the good work Bro..
No problem my friend I'm not out of it by any means and I still have days when I sit here and cry but at least this time around I understand what's going on
Thanks for your honesty mate. It especially takes guts to talk about battling mental illness. I have my issues too and I find your positive attitude inspirational.
No problem my friend I understand everything that you're going through as like you said I've been there myself and I'm still in it right now if ever you want to talk you can always email me 247pattaya@gmail.com
Great video Trev, thanks for sharing your experience as well 👍 its good to go prepared with knowledge of what happens there, but there will always be someone you meet that makes you crazy 😂
This has to be one of the best vlogs that you`ve put out Trevor, and you`ve put out some good ones. keep up the good work. Hope to meet up with you in the very near future for a few beers.
Trevor, hats off to mate, one of the best videos, yes I had similar lifestyle, but I i was poor coming to Bangkok, many car crashes along the way, sorting things out now, thanks for your time to show us, how to be better, many Australians say you are tops.
Great video, you can't emphasise enough how easy it is to get turned over in Pattaya, I saw a good friend lose everything and make a complete arse of himself , my mantra is " a short time is a good time" and I stick to it .
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee (with homage to Muhammad Ali "The Greatest") - that is my mantra when in Pattaya/Thailand. I'm in my late 60s with 4 grown-up 'kids' and 5 grandchildren etcetera etcetera in England and I've had umpteen great holidays in Thailand for the last 9 years as a single man (no way do I want a 3rd wife!). I always treat Thai girls (and all Thais) with the best respect and with a smile. Happy days will be here again, keep smiling!😊👌Great chat and advice for all Trev👍🧡
Whilst everything you said sounds very heartfelt and is no doubt true, its worth noting that you don't have to come to Thailand to have your heart broken and lose most everything. Sometimes you just have to roll the dice.
Respect for being honest about mental health issues. I believe it is important for men to be open and honest about all aspects of life, so well played :-)
Great vid mate, do more of them. Been to Thailand many times to bicycle tour around the place, bit hard for the girls to hit a moving target, so I've never had any problems with them. One of my old cycling friends could never understand why I'd go to Thailand and cycle when there were so many nice girls to play with. Well he let his guard down when one of his hotties said she loved him, so he gave her heaps of money never to see her again.
Nice one Trev...an open and honest and informative video. People need to hear about first hand experiences to drill home the different scenarios that could happen. You learned the hard way , so its great to inform others .I enjoy your walkabouts, but equally enjoy these types of videos. Keep up the great work mate and I just wish to say the Discord group is so good, glad to me a member.
Good advice from you again. I have been out in Thailand 20 ++ Years and seen few things !! You have to keep your wits about you try to enjoy life without being taken advantage off. All the best Shaun
If you own a property at home keep it and rent it out. Also if you can leave some money in an account at home and dont touch it. The biggest mistake is selling up everything at home. I have don it in the past (moved abroad but not to Thailand) and it all went horribly wrong meaning I had to move back home and start all over again. Lesson learned, you need at all costs to maintain the safety net at home in case it all goes wrong. If you cant afford to move here without selling up at home then just stick to coming here on holiday.
Thank you for being so humble, candid, honest and rational. I really enjoyed listening to you. You really change the idea we could have of Western guys in Pattaya. Would love to have a beer with you one day. Cheers!
Hi,I thought this vid was one of your best and most honest. I could relate to everything you said as was married out there myself. I was 50 when married and thai girl was 32 so I guess it was never gonna last. Things weren't right so we had a sit down one day and called it a day.......and I never ever thought of a balcony was the way out. Have been going thailand for 24 years now and still enjoy it,but such a wiser fella now. If you take Thailand for what it is and not what you think it should be things are great. Regards.
Don't suffer alone Brian, reach out even if it's with someone you don't know. Top man Trev for offering to be there and Brian I am here too with 40+ years of experience with depression in the bag. Life is a f***ing struggle mate but you are not alone. Contact details will be shared if requested. 💪💪
Great video Trev, more vlogs like this mate, guys need to know the situation they can get themselves in out there, been there got the t-shirt so I know, I treat every situation now as a business transaction, and the girls know if your a newbie on holiday, they have a scoring system to in the bars, top girls get the first pick etc
Truth bro...spot on...excellent post...love your honesty......btw...thnx for your kind reply the other day....will defo look you up when i get back ova...I been out of the game for some time...was living the past decade in Isaan...village life...so i got some moves ahead of me...re startin again...anyway...all the best for 22 to you and the guys and the girls......lets hope next year brings something good....for all of us...
Trev that's one of your best videos, it came across as totally off-the-cuff wisdom. And thanks for sharing snippets of your personal stories. The moral of the story seems to be: many of the women there are hardcore golddiggers and expert actresses who are like Cold War spies who will go deep undercover in a relationship for YEARS - convincingly faking love for you - to then resurface as their true cruel self when they've finally got what they want from you... and ruined you, despite all you've done for them. The capacity for such extreme cruelty towards somebody who treated them so well is breathtaking. So I'm surprised some of the wronged old boys don't take the young lady along with them on the final Balcony Airlines trip with The Pattaya Flying Club. The problem is that it's hard to believe anybody could be such a clever faker for so long. So after a year or so with a woman, as you say, you let your guard down, like... "I can see in her eyes she really loves me" so it doesn't even cross your mind that it could be a lie. I've seen it with philipino maids and home care nurses too in HK, Sing and USA - it's like they've spent their whole life training how to pretend they've fallen hopelessly in love with their host. So the old boy starts a relationship with them and eventually writes them in to his will. Mission Accomplished.
Hi. I am new to your channel. This was a great video. Thanks for the talk. I have been to Thailand many times and have met great girls and a few bad. This is a good subject for the newbie and people need to hear more. You are right that many girls are in it for the money. You meet a bar girl, she is poor with a poor family and there is a lot of pressure for her to bring home the money. I have friends who have married Thai girls and or live in Thailand and have had relationships that have been a disaster. I have also met a small few who have met the right girl and have a wonderful and families. I have been very fortunate to screen out the bad girls and find a few gems. Keep up the good work and I hope we can share a beer or two on my return to Pattaya.
One of your best videos yet Trev - sometimes we need to be brutally honest with ourselves, as its all too easy to get sucked in by a pretty face and a nice smile. A workmate of mine stopped me making a huge mistake some time back where I would have married the wrong woman and this experience red-pilled me. Its difficult to stay objective though as I have a soft heart and am very easy going, however I try to make sure to keep my guard up. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and I hope your throat gets better soon.
Excellent video today Trev and good on you for being so honest, been there myself but had the good sense to just walk away for good, her face was a picture to behold when I did. 555
I had a great chat with an 'off-duty' bar girl in Bangkok once over some yummy white Russians at a Kombi bar. She asked me "do the men in your country try to find a wife in a strip club.?" I said "No not typically". She smiled and said "well why do they do it here?" I shrugged my shoulders and we both laughed...
Exactly the point. There are tons of beautiful, independent and educated Thai ladies that are looking for a serious relationship, without necessarily asking money or other kind of support
Meet a local girl, not from a bar, she came to my condo a couple of times. Over breakfast she tells me she has an English boyfriend that has been supporting her over the last couple of years and he will be coming to Thailand the following week, so she won't be able to see me untill he goes back to England.
A good video. I would add, although it is implied in what was said, that when a farang buys a house etc. it generally goes in the name of the Thai partner due to the laws of Thailand preventing foreigners from buying land. If you buy a bar, again its probably going to be in the name of your Thai partner as its difficult for farangs to legally own bars in their own name. This effectively means that if the relationship ends then the Thai partner will generally end up with these assets and you walk away with little.
Foreigners can own land, on a lifetime lease, via a holding company registered in BKK. It is not simple and it is not cheap but it can be done. You lease the land from the company you own and the land/house sit as assets on the books.
Been coming to Thailand for 12 years and its like doing an apprenticeship learning the trappings of red lite culture , great video Trevor deep and informative , all the best for 2022.
@@Buzzinpattaya enjoyed this video lots. I was divorced 9 yrs ago. Well lost out financially .. like a lot of us do. Time to move forward , build again in the future now .. respect your honesty .. it’s a tough gig at times. I hear you about random bursts of teary 🥹 episodes .. ..
** Big tip! Never advertise your wealth! You *never* benefit! ** I remember going to a car showroom in Dubai three decades ago (I used to work in the deserts of Abu Dhabi) with a colleague of mine who I knew for a fact was a cash USD millionaire. We were looking at all these Italian supercars - in our desert clothes - when a young salesman from Jordan or Palestine came over and, seeing us admiring these Ferraris and Lamborghinis, said, "Hmm, it would be nice to be able to afford one of these cars, right?" I was expecting my workmate to say something along the lines of, "You stupid little prick. I could buy 4 of these now in cash if I wanted to", because I thought that is what I would have said if I had been a cash USD millionaire. But he did not say anything and his facial expression did not change. I think I actually kicked his ankle as if to say, "Tell him!" However, he just smiled and ushered me out. He was 30 years older than myself and was my mentor at work, so I respected him and would never dream of speaking to him angrily in front of anyone else. Once outside however I exploded on my mate and mentor! I remember saying to him, "Why didn't you say to that guy that, whereas he could barely afford to buy a wing-mirror for one of those cars, you could buy every single one in the showroom if you wanted to!" He just looked at me, sighed, and said, "Tell me one way in which I benefit from letting *anyone* - let alone a complete stranger - know I have money?" This was 30 years ago but it has stuck with me ever since. Up until then I thought - that is, I had been 'programmed' to believe - that if you had money and financial security/stability then you had to advertise the fact in public at each and every opportunity. Otherwise, what was the point of having it? Your clothes should communicate the fact that you have money. Your car should tell people you have money. Your watch should advertise the fact you have money. Everything you do, say, and have should be engineered to prove you have money. That is what I had previously thought and believed. I immediately saw then however that he was right, that he was spot on, in fact. You *never* benefit from ever letting *anyone* ever know you have money; all you do is tell people something that they do not need to know, and potentially leave yourself vulnerable and open to exploitation. ** Big tip! Never advertise your wealth! You *never* benefit! **
A friend married a bar girl and moved her to the UK. Paid for everything and her family. She met a group of other Thais local to her. For those that don't know, in the UK if you're a victim of domestic violence you will be granted a permenant visa. So, when he was out at one day she broke a couple of windows and smashed a few plates...called the police and accused him of DV. The report alone was enough to get her visa and divorce followed...after 18 months the charges were dropped and the nightmare finally ended....she's off with her UK Thai friends and 'working' again to feed her meth habbit he never knew she had...the reason why so many bar girls seem to sleep forever when they can is because they smoke to work, but it's very well hidden!
Reality is crazier than fiction. I would say that as the girls may feel they are being taken advantage of, the girls feel no way when taking advantage of their customers.
Trev, this had to be one of the best analogies of summing up the Thai Farang relationship minefield. 100% agree with everything you've said. I've not had any bad experiences with a Thai lady in Thailand, but did have a bad one with a Thai in the UK, who tried very hard, and nearly succeeded in rinsing me. I love Thailand for all the reasons you mentioned, been visiting for over 10 years, and got to know a few Thai ladies who have normal jobs away from the entertainment. Although I feel it could never happen to me, deep down I know it would almost certainly happen if I lived there 🤔
The problem usually start when you bring them back home after a few years, that’s a big no no, my ex also completely lost her sense of direction in Europe
Same happened to me with a Thai lady I met in London, luckily I did not loose much and I saw through her scams, but karma has paid her back big time, what goes around comes around, not only was she trouble to westerners, but also to thais, now no one trusts or believers in her.
This is probably one of the best, most honest chat moment of all Thai vlogs, thanks for your honesty.
Glad you enjoyed it
Great video chat Trev so honest with your story and some brilliant advice x
Agree, very transparent with good situational insight and valuable advices.
@@graavargen totally agree. I liked this side of you. More like this please.
100%.
One of his best chats.
Seen it happen more than once.
Just rent...rent your bike. Rent your condo. Rent your girl. If any of the 3 give you problems... get a new one.
Lol true
I think it was Heffner who said, "If you can fly it, float it or fuck it, rent it."
I was thinking the same
Sage words👍🏻
True ))
Probably the best, honest and down to earth vlogs I have seen. Well done Trevor.
Thank you so much
Great video, I would say I fit the stereotype I lost a marriage was suffering chronic ptsd from work, medically discharged and hit Thailand in my 60"s with money and no job... I wouldn't say I lost the lot but would say for 3 years spent alot and learnt alot, I did spread the love thou...
Built a bar, had alot of fun but now know it was straight out escapism... I wasn't a big drinker but could binge... No real regrets but I was generous... The bar actually saved me as I got to look at guys and what they were doing... I sold the bar before covid hit made a profit and had lived off it... I went back and forth home alot... I've never thought of living perm in Thailand...I love Thai women...
Suggestions would be with girls, under promise over deliver...realise a girl who has worked in bars awhile basically is a charming liar...
And always get a hotel with a good mirror... Most of us are not that handsome just too nice...
Thank you so much for sharing your experience
Some great advice!
You and I have chatted previously in an email about our similar circumstances so I’ll leave that there and for when we hopefully catch up for a beer. What I would say though is if I ever got divorced from my wife (Aussie), I can’t ever see myself living with another woman again. I’d quite happily get myself a condo and enjoy my own company and float like a butterfly when the need arises.
good man, look forward to meeting ya
Hey Trev, gotta say that’s one of the best vids you’ve done and the takes on the possible situations that many may experience…and absolutely appreciate your personal story, the ups and downs…and history and your perspective on these issues. I’ve a few mates that have lost a lot, some that are totally happy…some mates have been in Thai for 18-20 years plus…and I’ve learnt a lot from them, and relatively financially untouched…thankfully.
I’ve too much to say right here and will talk more in discord, and a few stories for Peter too.
Thanks mate for your honesty and telling it the way it is !
Happy New Year mate 🇦🇺🙏👍🍻
thanks mate glad you enjoyed it
Agreed Peter! It's funny, but this subject, with your car crash stories (Thailand Bound anyone!? 😉) and all the rest of it never fail to entertain and be popular. What does that tell us? Lol! I think you could create a channel that deals in nothing but this subject and you'd be onto a winner. I mean, just look through the posts and replies to this video.... Mmm, now there's an idea....... 🤣🤣🙂👍😉❤
@@Buzzinpattaya Very informative thou and always entertaining. Thumbs up
Thanks Trevor, One of your best videos IMO. Spot on with what you said, i have been there , done and got the bloody T shirt. Over 20 years and i haven't really learnt much, except how to speak Thai. Not prepared to reveal more as yet, but maybe later!
Gotcha mate and all the best
Thanks for opening up with all your personal details. I have followed you from the beginning and still learned some new things about you today. If you save one poor guy from losing everything, it’s well worth it.
thanks mate and yeah agreed
Here's the real root of the problem: that first time you meet a woman who pays attention to you. If you're a guy whose lived in a typical western country, you might be 30, 40, 50 years old, and that Thai woman, in a beer bar, is the first woman in your entire life whose ever smiled when you spoke to her, paid attention to you, and actually seemed interested in you (that "first woman" often includes your own mother). She's put in no effort at all, but it's so much more effort than you've ever received before.
Men are completely unprepared for how to handle that. In your home country, you've been a dog all your life who hasn't gotten a single table scrap, now, you're at the table eating the full course meal. It's not fair to expect a man to make rational decisions in that situation.
Men need to trained for this stuff. Once you learn that it is what it is, you can go to Thailand, have a wonderful trip, have a lot of fun, and come back home relaxed, re-energized and refreshed. Just be sure that Thai girl doesn't have your phone number, and that you don't have her's, and never call her again.
fantastic comment mate, 100% on the nail
Great observations! I lucked out and found mine 21 years ago when I was 30. But yes, that phone number thing is true and very dangerous.
Only dangerous if your married!
@@SuperSupersoda you're letting the guys off the hook too easy. if you've never gotten attention your entire life even from average looking women, why are attractive thai bar girls treating you so differently ("handsome man," "love you"). other guys warn you and there are so many youtube videos on these scams. it's because you want to believe in the fantasy. I thought men are the rational sex. if you're not popular back home, the odds are extremely low her feelings for you are genuine.
thanks for this video......It has literally saved me from making the biggest mistake of my life......I thank god I found your youtube channel
All good mate
A friend of mine (from the UK) had an attractive bar-girl girlfriend who he shared ownership in a bar and a house. At first everything was great and the bar was making money. However, they began to quarrel and she kicked him out of the house and took over his bar. He lost everything money-wise and was reduced to being a bum sleeping on the Pattaya beach. A few years later, he was able to move back to the UK (just much poorer and and in bad health). His girlfriend legally owned the house and land in Thailand (foreigners can't own Thai land). She also had multiple well-off sponsors, who she got while being legally married to him. Whenever I think of retiring in Thailand, I think of my UK friend and his negative experiences. I hope this never happens to me.
As a farang you basically can never own anything and have f'all rights in Thailand ... make no mistake, your money is welcome but you are not.
Foreigners *can* and *do* own land in Thailand! Why do people keep saying this?
Sadly this happens far more often than people realize
Thanks for the video Trev. It is the (hard) message that i need right now.
Very welcome all the best
Of all them, this is still the best one you've ever done Trev. What great advice and put as though you're a best friend who's advice you respect, value and can trust. Thank you.
Wow, thanks!
Well done. As a 62-year-old divorced man who is getting ready to make his first trip to Thailand, this is exactly what I needed to hear.
Thank you.
I wish you a fun and enjoyable time here
Be very very careful mate. Enjoy yourself but keep your wits about you . Truest thing someone said to me was Thailand can be heaven but can be hell as well , and don't get oneitis there are thousands of girls there don't get fixated on one .
62 year old divorced man going to Thailand for first time. What could possibly go wrong ? LOL.
Enjoy !
@@NicolaSturgeon-pl4bs well thanks but I still haven’t made it to Thailand. I ended up going to Vietnam instead last April because of the 5 day test rule that was still enforced in Thailand. Then , last month, I chose to go on Safari in Tanzania instead of going to Thailand again. But, next April may actually make it there… or India…I want to do the Delhi-Agra-Jaipur triangle…I’ll get there eventually.
This video is gold, might be the most important one on your channel. That's literally the most important things to be aware of before coming. Thanks for being honest and sharing your story. It's easy to get tricked believing "I am different" or "she is different". You should do this type of content more, might save lots of people from making mistakes that could be avoided. Everyone will have better experiences if they have the right expectations.
Thank you so much
This should be played on a continuous loop in Suvarnabhumi arrivals hall, 555.
55555
@@Buzzinpattaya It should be on the plane!
Great video. Very honest, sincere and straightforward. Thank you
Welcome
Thanks for being so honest and open Trev, whatever you have mentioned in the video makes so much sense...keep up the good work, all the very best
Thank you very much all the best my man
Excellent video Trev and pertinent content for anyone visiting Thailand. Funnily enough, I have been speaking to a few Thai ladies from TF. Met a few lovely women on there with normal jobs and businesses in some cases. However, there one lady who’s a primary school teacher and every conversation seems to be geared towards how much she struggles, and implied requests for support. I normally brush it off with empathy and kind words. Two weeks ago I finally relented and sent her 6000 as a Xmas gift, low and behold, two days later it’s all spent and the guilt trip starts again. Now, not five minutes ago, her grandad has died and she needs 3000 to visit him in another province. Suffice to say I said no, and won’t be continuing our chats anymore. Short term pain has given me long term gain in her case. It’s so easy to be sucked in to their lies and half truths. It’s another lesson from the LOS.
Glad you managed to suss out the situation before you got in too deep
@@Buzzinpattaya I’m more amazed that you’ve taken the time to personally reply to nearly 900 massages. Even the trolls get a lol 😂 looking forward to your New Years chat about the lessons you’ve learnt on RUclips.
I’ll definitely buy you a beer when I visit in February, and that’s a rarity from a yid to a gooner. Lol
You have be blunt with them, its the only language they understand. Just say sorry I have no more money to send.
One of your best videos. Felt like I was listening to a mate. Thanks for sharing your story and advice, and expressing empathy for others.
No problem my friend you are very welcome and Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you
thanks for being so transparent >>> really impressive and loved every word u said
Thank you
This is the best advise so far from you. Thanks.
Thank you
Your advice is always on the money. Great content. Your forthrightness and talking from the heart are a gem. Keep it up and for those who are going through a tough time in the name of love, just keep your head up and hopefully you will pull through soonest.
I appreciate that! Cheers mate much appreciated
Probably your best ever video ! Personally very relevant (I'm at the do I stay or go bit). Your honesty and concern for others shines through. If you're a caring person it's easy to understand how the " jumpers" get to the point of no return.
All the best mate hope you work things out
Great video. I wish I had this information 10 years ago.
So do I lol
Thank you for telling us your story. That was very brave. Lots of respect.
no worries mate, is what it is
@@Buzzinpattaya it took guts .
Fair play. Im sure it was heard to admit your mistakes. As a fellow Thai fan, I feel your pain mate. Glad to hear you've now found a good one. Good luck
To be fair it destroyed me walking away but it would have destroyed me more had I stayed
@@Buzzinpattaya You seem in a much better place now Trevor. Every cloud.... as they say
Thank you for sharing this so someone else doesn’t have trouble.
That took a lot of courage.
Please have more stuff like this. Your helping people avoid trouble, and may save a life or two.
Gotcha
Excellent Coffee Chat, Excellent topic, excellent content
thank you so much
I agree with what you say and it is one of your best videos. I have fortunately always kept what money I have from women by being hard hearted. Always polite but firm. I don't need to be rich just comfortable. Also being a life long bachelor suits me. Little pressure to please anyone but myself
Fair play to you
Cheer's Trev.
That has been real good advice.
I'm in that category where i fall soft with women, and even more so if i was in Thailand.
Excellent video.
Welcome.mate and don't worry you are not alone
Well done Trevor, been there etc, fortunately only a few thousand pounds in my case before I saw the light. At least I had ball for 18 months.
Your best video to date.
Best of luck for 2022, especially with the bar.
Thank you so much and thank you for sharing
Trevor mate, have to say, been an advid follower, I look forward to all your live streams, but I want to highlight this stream, this has been your best stream, in my opinion, your a top man Trev....
Thank you so much
I love your honesty Trev, especially in regards to mental health 🙌🏻 looking forward to more videos like this!!
No problem my friend
Wow. I admire your honesty in a attempt to help other people avoid finding themselves in the same situation you were in. Kudos to you and glad that things turned around for you.
Thanks mate and yeah it happens
Thanks for sharing your experiences and useful brutal honesty. 👍
My pleasure!
Appreciate all the information helps everyone here to be that little bit wiser and if it saves just one guy losing everything was well worth the effort you put in.
Thanks mate
Great video Trev. Very informative and well said. It’s very easy to fall in love and let your guard down in Pattaya and most places in SE Asia the same. Take care!
Thank you mate and take care too
Ver good advice Trev. Thanks for sharing.
welcome mate
Good work Trev. It's so easy to be sucked into the sick buffalo syndrome. I'm married to a Thai lady 24 years my junior. We moved to the UK where we are now happily separated. She's still rinsing me, I just paid for part 3 of her UK visa! Why? She is the mother of my daughter and she cooks a great Tom Yum. No fool like an old fool.
Fair play for sharing mate and all the best to you
love your honesty man
Thank you very much
I learned similar things from a relationship with a Canadian women from Vancouver. I’m red pill now and can say he is absolutely right. NEVER let your guard down. Not here, not back home, not ANYWHERE!!!
The only person that matters is YOU!
Well said mate and glad your all sorted again
Lol I know about the USA keep. An Eyeball on things, was curious as to how cutthroat they were in Thailand, lol.
The Farange that come here with a final salary pension with a big lump sum are the most prized Buffalo of all!
indeed
Great and well balanced video. The proof of this is how it has made me think and see how i do thinks wrong. But on the flip side your thoughts make me see that there is a great life to be found here.
Well done sir!
all about balance mate, all the best
What a great straight chat !! You have said the truth and the truth hurts !!! . Hopefully it has made a lot of men think about the year ahead ! . ( maybe better to lose a little !! Then lose it all !! The truth in a few words !!) . Well done 👍 on a great chat !!
Thank you very much
Great video Trevor, admire your honesty.
I will go into more detail in today's live stream
When I was in the US Navy, we had a saying for places like this and the Philippines. They are so cheap, they are expensive. Very good chat sir.
haha cheers mate
Bro this is a great vid.. Ive been to Thailand many times and one of the last times there I got scammed in Patong. I met a girl online as I like to have a GF experience whenever I would come to Thailand and she got me.. Half way thru my holiday she went crazy. She wouldn't leave me alone I ended up having to pay her 30k baht just to leave me alone and I had to change locations of where I was living at that time because she was still calling my phone and acting crazy.. Many guys get got but I still love Thailand but I now have my head on straight when dealing with the girls.. I even had a girl fight another girl in Pataya.. Its crazy out there but I still love it.. Thanks for the good work Bro..
thanks for sharing mate, yeah they can flick like a light switch, normal to bonkers in a nano second lol
Thanks for being honest about your depression.The more people talk about it the better, and glad you came out the other side 👍🇮🇪
No problem my friend I'm not out of it by any means and I still have days when I sit here and cry but at least this time around I understand what's going on
Thanks for your honesty mate. It especially takes guts to talk about battling mental illness. I have my issues too and I find your positive attitude inspirational.
No problem my friend I understand everything that you're going through as like you said I've been there myself and I'm still in it right now if ever you want to talk you can always email me 247pattaya@gmail.com
@@Buzzinpattaya Thanks mate; I appreciate that.
Great video Trev, thanks for sharing your experience as well 👍 its good to go prepared with knowledge of what happens there, but there will always be someone you meet that makes you crazy 😂
Thank you so much you are very welcome
Great topic, something we all need to be aware of.
Thank you
One of your better video's, most direct about this issue.
Thank you
This has to be one of the best vlogs that you`ve put out Trevor, and you`ve put out some good ones. keep up the good work. Hope to meet up with you in the very near future for a few beers.
Thank you mate much appreciated
Trevor, hats off to mate, one of the best videos, yes I had similar lifestyle, but I i was poor coming to Bangkok, many car crashes along the way, sorting things out now, thanks for your time to show us, how to be better, many Australians say you are tops.
thanks mate and glad you are sorted now
Great video, you can't emphasise enough how easy it is to get turned over in Pattaya, I saw a good friend lose everything and make a complete arse of himself , my mantra is " a short time is a good time" and I stick to it .
As you said it is very very easy to lose sight of the main target that the girls place on our foreheads
Very genuine and imo one of your best vids. I am going to visite myself, this was a nice story to keep in the back of your head.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee (with homage to Muhammad Ali "The Greatest") - that is my mantra when in Pattaya/Thailand. I'm in my late 60s with 4 grown-up 'kids' and 5 grandchildren etcetera etcetera in England and I've had umpteen great holidays in Thailand for the last 9 years as a single man (no way do I want a 3rd wife!). I always treat Thai girls (and all Thais) with the best respect and with a smile. Happy days will be here again, keep smiling!😊👌Great chat and advice for all Trev👍🧡
Indeed and thank you for sharing
This is probably the best video relative to the subject discussed I’ve ever seen and very welcome. Thanks so much
Glad you enjoyed the video thank you so much
Great video! Actually one of your best
Thank you so much
Whilst everything you said sounds very heartfelt and is no doubt true, its worth noting that you don't have to come to Thailand to have your heart broken and lose most everything. Sometimes you just have to roll the dice.
100% spot on my friend absolutely on the nail
Respect for being honest about mental health issues. I believe it is important for men to be open and honest about all aspects of life, so well played :-)
Just saying how it is mate
Great vid mate, do more of them. Been to Thailand many times to bicycle tour around the place, bit hard for the girls to hit a moving target, so I've never had any problems with them. One of my old cycling friends could never understand why I'd go to Thailand and cycle when there were so many nice girls to play with. Well he let his guard down when one of his hotties said she loved him, so he gave her heaps of money never to see her again.
Thank you for sharing
Nice one Trev...an open and honest and informative video. People need to hear about first hand experiences to drill home the different scenarios that could happen. You learned the hard way , so its great to inform others .I enjoy your walkabouts, but equally enjoy these types of videos. Keep up the great work mate and I just wish to say the Discord group is so good, glad to me a member.
Unfortunately it happens out here and we just have to dust ourselves down and carry on again
Good advice from you again. I have been out in Thailand 20 ++ Years and seen few things !! You have to keep your wits about you try to enjoy life without being taken advantage off. All the best Shaun
cheers mate and yeah stay ahead of the game
If you own a property at home keep it and rent it out. Also if you can leave some money in an account at home and dont touch it. The biggest mistake is selling up everything at home. I have don it in the past (moved abroad but not to Thailand) and it all went horribly wrong meaning I had to move back home and start all over again. Lesson learned, you need at all costs to maintain the safety net at home in case it all goes wrong. If you cant afford to move here without selling up at home then just stick to coming here on holiday.
100% agreed
Good advise.. Take serious notice guys..
Thank you for being so humble, candid, honest and rational. I really enjoyed listening to you. You really change the idea we could have of Western guys in Pattaya. Would love to have a beer with you one day. Cheers!
Thank you mate much appreciated
Really good advice
Thank you so much
Brialliant,definitely one of your better videos or perhaps the best video so far Trev,keep it coming
Glad you enjoyed it
This is a great post Comrade & you've been kind & gentle with your comments too.
Thank you so much
Hi,I thought this vid was one of your best and most honest. I could relate to everything you said as was married out there myself. I was 50 when married and thai girl was 32 so I guess it was never gonna last. Things weren't right so we had a sit down one day and called it a day.......and I never ever thought of a balcony was the way out. Have been going thailand for 24 years now and still enjoy it,but such a wiser fella now. If you take Thailand for what it is and not what you think it should be things are great. Regards.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience
You describe me living alone busting out at drop of a dime in tears . Depression sucks and it's a bad struggle.
I'm always here mate if you ever want to email me I totally understand the situation you're in 247pattaya@gmail.com
Don't suffer alone Brian, reach out even if it's with someone you don't know. Top man Trev for offering to be there and Brian I am here too with 40+ years of experience with depression in the bag. Life is a f***ing struggle mate but you are not alone. Contact details will be shared if requested. 💪💪
Really good video Trevor every word so true 👍
Thank you
Great video Trev, more vlogs like this mate, guys need to know the situation they can get themselves in out there, been there got the t-shirt so I know, I treat every situation now as a business transaction, and the girls know if your a newbie on holiday, they have a scoring system to in the bars, top girls get the first pick etc
By far the best attitude and approach to have
Truth bro...spot on...excellent post...love your honesty......btw...thnx for your kind reply the other day....will defo look you up when i get back ova...I been out of the game for some time...was living the past decade in Isaan...village life...so i got some moves ahead of me...re startin again...anyway...all the best for 22 to you and the guys and the girls......lets hope next year brings something good....for all of us...
Welcome mate always
Trev that's one of your best videos, it came across as totally off-the-cuff wisdom. And thanks for sharing snippets of your personal stories. The moral of the story seems to be: many of the women there are hardcore golddiggers and expert actresses who are like Cold War spies who will go deep undercover in a relationship for YEARS - convincingly faking love for you - to then resurface as their true cruel self when they've finally got what they want from you... and ruined you, despite all you've done for them. The capacity for such extreme cruelty towards somebody who treated them so well is breathtaking. So I'm surprised some of the wronged old boys don't take the young lady along with them on the final Balcony Airlines trip with The Pattaya Flying Club.
The problem is that it's hard to believe anybody could be such a clever faker for so long. So after a year or so with a woman, as you say, you let your guard down, like... "I can see in her eyes she really loves me" so it doesn't even cross your mind that it could be a lie.
I've seen it with philipino maids and home care nurses too in HK, Sing and USA - it's like they've spent their whole life training how to pretend they've fallen hopelessly in love with their host. So the old boy starts a relationship with them and eventually writes them in to his will. Mission Accomplished.
No problem mate you're very welcome
Hi. I am new to your channel. This was a great video. Thanks for the talk. I have been to Thailand many times and have met great girls and a few bad. This is a good subject for the newbie and people need to hear more. You are right that many girls are in it for the money. You meet a bar girl, she is poor with a poor family and there is a lot of pressure for her to bring home the money. I have friends who have married Thai girls and or live in Thailand and have had relationships that have been a disaster. I have also met a small few who have met the right girl and have a wonderful and families. I have been very fortunate to screen out the bad girls and find a few gems. Keep up the good work and I hope we can share a beer or two on my return to Pattaya.
Thank you and welcome mate, great to have you over on here
Your best video Trev
Thank you
One of your best videos yet Trev - sometimes we need to be brutally honest with ourselves, as its all too easy to get sucked in by a pretty face and a nice smile. A workmate of mine stopped me making a huge mistake some time back where I would have married the wrong woman and this experience red-pilled me. Its difficult to stay objective though as I have a soft heart and am very easy going, however I try to make sure to keep my guard up. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and I hope your throat gets better soon.
Thank you very much
Excellent video today Trev and good on you for being so honest, been there myself but had the good sense to just walk away for good, her face was a picture to behold when I did. 555
cheers mate
It was your best video , as anyone who has been there and been involved will know.
Thank you so much
Brilliant love your honesty
Cheers mate
I had a great chat with an 'off-duty' bar girl in Bangkok once over some yummy white Russians at a Kombi bar. She asked me "do the men in your country try to find a wife in a strip club.?" I said "No not typically". She smiled and said "well why do they do it here?" I shrugged my shoulders and we both laughed...
hahaha she has a point
Exactly the point. There are tons of beautiful, independent and educated Thai ladies that are looking for a serious relationship, without necessarily asking money or other kind of support
@@carlogardella5808 Very true, but you will be expected to help look after the family (within reason), it's the Thai way.
@@snuscaboose1942 I do not agree on this. It is not always that way. You could say 50-50
@@carlogardella5808 Fair enough, would depend on the lady's background.
Honesty speakers volumes Trev, well done mate, your such an honest top man
I got taken mate, sad but true lol
A very well put together and thought provoking video, keep up the great work Trev 👍
Thank you mate and will do
One of the best videos you made big thanks mate , cant wait to come buy you a drink 😁👍
Any time!
Meet a local girl, not from a bar, she came to my condo a couple of times.
Over breakfast she tells me she has an English boyfriend that has been supporting her over the last couple of years and he will be coming to Thailand the following week, so she won't be able to see me untill he goes back to England.
Normal mate
About Right.
Thats crazy mate.. like she have no hearth beating in her chest
out bid him if you like her that much :)
At least sbe was honest and up front, then its your call and saves you being strung alone
A good video. I would add, although it is implied in what was said, that when a farang buys a house etc. it generally goes in the name of the Thai partner due to the laws of Thailand preventing foreigners from buying land. If you buy a bar, again its probably going to be in the name of your Thai partner as its difficult for farangs to legally own bars in their own name. This effectively means that if the relationship ends then the Thai partner will generally end up with these assets and you walk away with little.
valid point mate thank you for sharing
Even I knew this . Jesus . Don't guys do their homework ?
Foreigners can own land, on a lifetime lease, via a holding company registered in BKK. It is not simple and it is not cheap but it can be done. You lease the land from the company you own and the land/house sit as assets on the books.
Been coming to Thailand for 12 years and its like doing an apprenticeship learning the trappings of red lite culture , great video Trevor deep and informative , all the best for 2022.
Thank you mate and all the best to you too
Best yet Trev...
Bet ya Jimmy agrees,
Thanks for being so honest...
Well done bro
Glad you enjoyed it
As usual, awesome advice! Aloha 😎🤙🏾
Cheers mate
Thanks mate, 20 minutes well spent.
Thank you
@@Buzzinpattaya enjoyed this video lots. I was divorced 9 yrs ago. Well lost out financially .. like a lot of us do. Time to move forward , build again in the future now .. respect your honesty .. it’s a tough gig at times. I hear you about random bursts of teary 🥹 episodes .. ..
Im saving this video to watch on the plane before landing in Thailand in june
Safe travels
Hats off. Thanks for your perspective.
Thanks for watching!
Wish id seen a blog like this 10 years ago b4 my first Thai trip from oz
I might still have a quid , spot on Trev
Yeah me too lol
I admire your candidness. You've probably single-handedly saved a bunch of guys' savings. Love is blind they say. 👍🏿
I'm just saying how it is from experience mate thats all
** Big tip! Never advertise your wealth! You *never* benefit! **
I remember going to a car showroom in Dubai three decades ago (I used to work in the deserts of Abu Dhabi) with a colleague of mine who I knew for a fact was a cash USD millionaire. We were looking at all these Italian supercars - in our desert clothes - when a young salesman from Jordan or Palestine came over and, seeing us admiring these Ferraris and Lamborghinis, said, "Hmm, it would be nice to be able to afford one of these cars, right?" I was expecting my workmate to say something along the lines of, "You stupid little prick. I could buy 4 of these now in cash if I wanted to", because I thought that is what I would have said if I had been a cash USD millionaire. But he did not say anything and his facial expression did not change. I think I actually kicked his ankle as if to say, "Tell him!" However, he just smiled and ushered me out. He was 30 years older than myself and was my mentor at work, so I respected him and would never dream of speaking to him angrily in front of anyone else.
Once outside however I exploded on my mate and mentor! I remember saying to him, "Why didn't you say to that guy that, whereas he could barely afford to buy a wing-mirror for one of those cars, you could buy every single one in the showroom if you wanted to!" He just looked at me, sighed, and said, "Tell me one way in which I benefit from letting *anyone* - let alone a complete stranger - know I have money?"
This was 30 years ago but it has stuck with me ever since. Up until then I thought - that is, I had been 'programmed' to believe - that if you had money and financial security/stability then you had to advertise the fact in public at each and every opportunity. Otherwise, what was the point of having it? Your clothes should communicate the fact that you have money. Your car should tell people you have money. Your watch should advertise the fact you have money. Everything you do, say, and have should be engineered to prove you have money. That is what I had previously thought and believed.
I immediately saw then however that he was right, that he was spot on, in fact. You *never* benefit from ever letting *anyone* ever know you have money; all you do is tell people something that they do not need to know, and potentially leave yourself vulnerable and open to exploitation.
** Big tip! Never advertise your wealth! You *never* benefit! **
Without doubt this is the best comment by a mile....... So so relate to all this
A friend married a bar girl and moved her to the UK. Paid for everything and her family. She met a group of other Thais local to her. For those that don't know, in the UK if you're a victim of domestic violence you will be granted a permenant visa. So, when he was out at one day she broke a couple of windows and smashed a few plates...called the police and accused him of DV. The report alone was enough to get her visa and divorce followed...after 18 months the charges were dropped and the nightmare finally ended....she's off with her UK Thai friends and 'working' again to feed her meth habbit he never knew she had...the reason why so many bar girls seem to sleep forever when they can is because they smoke to work, but it's very well hidden!
JEEEZE!!!!!! sorry to read this, wow!
Reality is crazier than fiction.
I would say that as the girls may feel they are being taken advantage of, the girls feel no way when taking advantage of their customers.
A great video Trevor, excellent advice.
Thanks 👍
Trev,
this had to be one of the best analogies of summing up the Thai Farang relationship minefield.
100% agree with everything you've said. I've not had any bad experiences with a Thai lady in Thailand, but did have a bad one with a Thai in the UK, who tried very hard, and nearly succeeded in rinsing me. I love Thailand for all the reasons you mentioned, been visiting for over 10 years, and got to know a few Thai ladies who have normal jobs away from the entertainment. Although I feel it could never happen to me, deep down I know it would almost certainly happen if I lived there 🤔
Thanks for sharing your personal thoughts
The problem usually start when you bring them back home after a few years, that’s a big no no, my ex also completely lost her sense of direction in Europe
Same happened to me with a Thai lady I met in London, luckily I did not loose much and I saw through her scams, but karma has paid her back big time, what goes around comes around, not only was she trouble to westerners, but also to thais, now no one trusts or believers in her.