Letting Go Of The Guilt From My Past

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  • Опубликовано: 18 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 142

  • @earthfriendlyvloger
    @earthfriendlyvloger 2 года назад +59

    You inspired me to start writing a book about all the trauma & bad things I have been through too so I can help many ppl like just like you are.🙏 I hope to one day be as brave as you & talk openly about them to the world x 🌎 💕

  • @Mabeljo2022
    @Mabeljo2022 2 года назад +20

    I lost my dad 4 years ago. He shot himself in the head. He was on pain medication after knee surgery. And little did they know it made people do things like that. I’m so grateful I have my boyfriend Aaron to talk to.

  • @bbq5393
    @bbq5393 2 года назад +5

    I recently rewatched some of your old videos and it's so impressive to see how much you've changed, matured and grown. You went from a silly teenager to a wise, inspiring woman

  • @amylee0870
    @amylee0870 2 года назад +14

    There are some insights that ONLY come with age and experience. Like many people,,due to choices I made, I had to grow up VERY fast. It's puts people in a very weird place - You have way more insight than the majority of people your age, but there are always these weird "loose ends".... those loose ends are only tied by living life - for 20, 30,40, 50 years. No matter what you do, feel, or experience, you can't speed up the insights or what you learn- it just HAPPENS.
    Having the benefit of many years of life experience, I can tell you that you are exactly where you should be. You have been on a tremendous journey. In addition to mourning a horrific loss, you are also coming to terms with and working through very negative emotions- fear, pain, anger, guilt, resentment, etc ; all while trying to find your authentic self and honor your late-husband while speaking your truth. At 50, with years of life experience, this would be overwhelming. At 21, it's like climbing Mt
    Everest.
    You are doing amazing. Honor where you are now every step of the way, even on the bad days and the REALLY bad days- the ones when you make mistakes and missteps. It's OK! Keep pushing forward and living your truth.
    As an aside, I have worked in the Health Insurance field for over 25 years. If you continue to struggle with finding appropriate medical providers, or having your needs met in terms of mental health- be it getting medication or otherwise, feel free to reach out to me. I can provide you with some insight to help navigate the system successfully. Much love and respect to you.

    • @CamFamBam
      @CamFamBam  2 года назад +2

      This was so reassuring to read :) Thank you so much for your kind words and support

  • @jaysenotero5807
    @jaysenotero5807 2 года назад +43

    Hi cam! I definitely agree with you on your past makes you who you are. It takes a lot to change and become a better person and the person you are now is shaped by your past experiences. You have been through so much and I know everyone who has been following you through your journey is sooo proud of you. Your past will always be with you in your mind but IT DOES NOT DEFINE WHO YOU ARE NOW! You are so amazing and such a great mom and there are so many people who are proud of you and how much you have grown as a person❤️

  • @user-of5bd9xf4s
    @user-of5bd9xf4s Год назад +1

    Your emotional maturity and willingness to admit your mistakes and be as aware of them as possible reminds me a lot of my mom. I think that is a part of why you have been working on yourself so much, subconsciouslly you will put your pride aside to make sure you are the most compassionate and stable for your girls. Good luck and very impressive steps, it takes a lot of dignity and humility for those kinds of baby steps.

  • @yepperooyepperoo5800
    @yepperooyepperoo5800 2 года назад +4

    There IS something to be said for growing older. With age usually comes wisdom. Accept what you did (good or bad) and forever move to be a better person. "Try" is the key word. You will learn lessons every decade. We all do.

  • @darkestnightproductions
    @darkestnightproductions 2 года назад +2

    Your ranting is really comforting to me. It helps me calm down, and do the things I love like writing my story, or my diary. It really did help me today because today was a bit rough. I did something bad, and then about thirty minutes later I started throwing up, so I had decided to watch you, and write in my notebooks for the rest of the day. I had the day off from school today, and it didn't turn out to be the sort of day I expected, but I'm not sure if I would want it to be any different then how it actually was. Your video helped me appreciate days like this, because they don't come around too often (or ever). I know they're not sunshine and rainbows, but I feel as if I need a day like this every once and a while. I love you, Camryn :)

  • @ichloefetti
    @ichloefetti 2 года назад +1

    I like how you mention that valuing your present self doesn’t have to be done by shitting on your past self. I needed to hear that. We should honor our past selves. We shouldn’t shit on them bc if not for them, we wouldn’t be our future selves, our best selves. You’re awesome. Don’t hate your past present or future self.

  • @loribillings3810
    @loribillings3810 2 года назад +3

    Love your doodle sharing time Camryn. Just remember every where you go you will always be there. Be gentle on yourself you are worth it and keep it simple.

  • @pixiebeanx
    @pixiebeanx 2 года назад +14

    over the past year i have made the most amazing friends, i was not okay, having them made life better. I think its underrated how much having supportive friends can help you grow and change you, and when its good change its amazing! And personally i think that meeting friends while you are vulnerable is the most amazing thing, it helps them get to know you, and the real you that you want to become appears as you feel more confident, you feel loved and supported, and they will open up to you too, most people are going through things and having people to vent to and having them vent to you is great! You got this!!

  • @elizabethhelmer6467
    @elizabethhelmer6467 2 года назад +34

    There is no reason to feel guilty ❤️ I love you cam

  • @starshine3248
    @starshine3248 2 года назад +1

    I believe that we are all born blessed and are here to be a blessing to one another. We are students of life...learning from experiences and hopefully living in the present moment to expand our consciousness for higher good in the world around us ❤️

  • @juliechilton59
    @juliechilton59 2 года назад +1

    life is full lessons some hard some not but never feel guilty im 51 and when i look back the things we go threw makes us who we are ....the losses the heartache you learn to not forget but move fwd .... your young you have lots wonderful things coming

  • @shannonmehler4737
    @shannonmehler4737 2 года назад +12

    We all don’t like something about our past self but remember with everything you have been though you are strong and brave. I’m not young to be honest I’m 53 and have had a rough life like you but in different ways. I’ll tell you what people tell me. We aren’t giving no more than we can handle be yes I wonder if that’s true. I really enjoy watching you.

  • @addisonabare6915
    @addisonabare6915 2 года назад +2

    I can’t tell you how much I needed that talk. Thank you

  • @fantasyprincessgirl
    @fantasyprincessgirl 2 года назад +14

    I know, Camryn. It’s even hard for me to let go of my guilts of my past.

  • @amayaw27
    @amayaw27 2 года назад +1

    you articulate yourself so well, i can never put into words how i feel but it is very similar to what you described.. it’s a comfort to know i’m not alone, thank you for sharing 😊

  • @kenneditompkins3609
    @kenneditompkins3609 2 года назад +8

    Cam thank you for sharing this and letting us be apart of you and your girls life It means they world to me your truely a 1 In a million Cam I'm so proud of you girl you and they girls deserve everything In more!!!!!!

  • @gethealthywithbritt07
    @gethealthywithbritt07 2 года назад +1

    I can’t say enough how wise you are

  • @gabirela9
    @gabirela9 2 года назад +1

    I can not tell you how much I needed to hear this. Thank you.

  • @erikwallis153
    @erikwallis153 2 года назад +24

    Cam don’t hate yourself right now all those girls have is you.

  • @bfox5284
    @bfox5284 2 года назад +1

    U talking about moving away from the people that new the version of you you didn’t really like, I’m in the same boat. I felt that so much. Thanks for being you.

  • @jillianaguirre9
    @jillianaguirre9 2 года назад +2

    This is exactly how I feel! You seem like a really really good friend. Keep going you’re doing so good 😊

  • @jadeydoodle
    @jadeydoodle 2 года назад +2

    please do these kind of videos more often, you help me so much more than you realize cam and im proud of u for all you’ve become

  • @marissafry7787
    @marissafry7787 2 года назад +1

    I appreciate how open you are with us. I am going through a very hard time myself and like you I have struggled with anxiety and depression. I can relate to so many things you say in this and the way you think. Please don’t ever feel like we feel like you’re trauma dumping on us. We love you and support you!

  • @karenkane3220
    @karenkane3220 2 года назад +1

    I love these videos. You are so raw and honest and also caring.

  • @anastasiakranz4526
    @anastasiakranz4526 2 года назад +2

    The difference in your eyes from the intro to your actual videos is amazing. You seems so much more content.

  • @kirstenleeper7677
    @kirstenleeper7677 2 года назад +2

    I love your channel! You literally inspire me to be a better person!

  • @missynicole746
    @missynicole746 2 года назад +1

    I agree with u 1000% I’m trying so hard to be this perfect person by November when I see someone again and I have to realize that I’ve been through some tough shit and that I have to just work on myself and just not be who I used to be

  • @peakster753
    @peakster753 2 года назад +1

    This is some good insights for stuff I’ve struggled with for the last 15 years as I’ve wrestled with depression and other mental health issues…

  • @ravensparrow7443
    @ravensparrow7443 2 года назад +6

    I love you so much cam and I think you’re one of my biggest inspirations and your videos help me feel a lot better because right as everything about Landon was going on my life completely changed and a lot of bad things happened and now that all that’s over I’m still recovering and I just enjoy watching your videos and relating to everything and im so proud of you you’re absolutely wonderful

  • @carolpimenta8489
    @carolpimenta8489 2 года назад +2

    i love you Cam, I'm so proud of you! You are so strong. I've been watching you since Coco was born and I feel like I'm your friend :)

  • @donnamyer9810
    @donnamyer9810 2 года назад +3

    Cam you are so young. Yet you are so wise. You will do very well. You deserve a lot of credit.

  • @azukibun
    @azukibun 2 года назад +1

    you are always my fave.. i'm turning 27 next month and you have more strength than i could ever. i'm an artist tho and i believe anyone can, keep practicing and give your girls a chance to doodle n get messy if they want. you're talented.. keep going. practice practice practice

  • @shaylynnflannery3276
    @shaylynnflannery3276 2 года назад +3

    Coco looks like her momma! Cam your doing a great job as being a parent…don’t let depression get the best of you gotta be stronger for the girls

    • @jojosummer7898
      @jojosummer7898 2 года назад +2

      Her name is Camryn not Kimberly

    • @shaylynnflannery3276
      @shaylynnflannery3276 2 года назад +2

      Yeah I realized that.. I don’t pay attention to comments🤷‍♀️

    • @KiliClare
      @KiliClare 2 года назад +1

      Camryn* lol

  • @EVAA1404
    @EVAA1404 2 года назад +5

    You're so strong, never forget it

  • @simplyurmom5664
    @simplyurmom5664 2 года назад +7

    I love you cam

  • @missynicole746
    @missynicole746 2 года назад +1

    Thank u for talking about all of ur struggles with mental health ur videos help me more than you’ll ever know I’m going through ALOT at the moment and it’s nice to know that I’m not as alone as I think I am ur so strong honey just keep ur head up ok? We’ve got this 🤗

  • @le4905
    @le4905 2 года назад +1

    Reading these comments... Yes, you would make a fantastic therapist. I can see you in your cozy little office in Austin, 10 years from now, helping out others.

  • @jodoodlyboi2963
    @jodoodlyboi2963 2 года назад +1

    I got chills and almost started crying and just said to myself “how are we the same?”. Emotionally and mentally we are very similar. That’s why you’re my favorite comfort RUclipsr. Colleen Ballinger is probably 2nd

  • @rachel9987
    @rachel9987 2 года назад +2

    I LOVE YOU CAM YOURE SO INSPIRING

  • @missmaryreadaloud
    @missmaryreadaloud 2 года назад +3

    You have inspired me to try and be a better version of myself. For example to be more responsible for how I use my time day today and make progress on life goals that I’ve been procrastinating on, small or big.
    Mary Rutter (Education Assistant, Canada)

  • @claireclarkeignite8458
    @claireclarkeignite8458 2 года назад +1

    Cam you are such a strong woman, you just don't know it. You limit your strength. You speak negative in your life but that is not you. You are bigger than what you speak you are. I feel like the Caribbean would build you

  • @katherinegibson740
    @katherinegibson740 2 года назад +2

    Very insightful chat, you would make an amazing therapist for young people. Love the doodles.

  • @MsZoedog66
    @MsZoedog66 2 года назад +1

    You are always going to be the sum total of your experiences, but looking back at your life with balance and not just focusing on the loss of Landon might be helpful in lifting your mood. I find therapy helps enormously, and there's no shame in that. Boundaries are good, too. You don't need to let go of those at all. You are right about time, and hopefully if you can maintain minimal expectations on yourself you are in with a good chance. I think regarding other people, I have noticed that people think I think I am perfect. I have been going through some heavy life experience, losing someone close to me (my dad's mum who was like a mother figure to me), and I have just been putting things which come up in the 'I'll deal with it later' basket. I don't have the strength or inclination to deal with them right now, but I am pretty sure they'll come up again because defects of character always do! Trying not to be too hard on myself, even if others can't do that. You should draw your daughters, Ozzy and Landon. I see you, Camryn. 💗🌵

  • @katieb3172
    @katieb3172 2 года назад +1

    Don’t feel too guilty about your past self. We’re the same age so I can say with confidence that you change so quickly and drastically around this time. I am not the same person I was six months ago, you probably aren’t either. I cannot imagine what that experience would be if I was living your life, being a mother, a widow, and a youtuber too! It’s easy for people to pull out their pitchforks when they’re on the other side of the fence and don’t have to live it. What they think of you is also just a projection of their own insecurities and denial of how much they have changed and needed to change too

  • @verdiana.Catherine_24
    @verdiana.Catherine_24 2 года назад +1

    Proud of you Cam!

  • @RosesandBlingPapercrafts
    @RosesandBlingPapercrafts 2 года назад +1

    Cam you’re an amazing inspiration!! You’ve got this ❤️

  • @coltchan7380
    @coltchan7380 2 года назад +2

    Perfection isn’t something one should aim for. Perfection means you stop. Stay in place. No more getting better.

  • @amandalynn1334
    @amandalynn1334 2 года назад +5

    Cam it may be worth going to your general doctor since you know what has worked before they would likely be willing to start you on that. It’s not a long term solution but hopefully will help for this period.

  • @Laura-nk6sk
    @Laura-nk6sk 2 года назад +1

    I'm glad your feeling better everyday

  • @Mimi-yn3yj
    @Mimi-yn3yj 2 года назад +4

    You inspire me to keep going Cam. I've been here since you were pregnant with Coco!

  • @kimberlyrudolphcap1789
    @kimberlyrudolphcap1789 2 года назад +1

    I know it’s Easter said than done, but you have to be kind to yourself! You totally get that though and are trying to be better about it. That’s all we can do really.

  • @gg-gg_gg
    @gg-gg_gg 2 года назад

    I saw this online "If you regret the past, you're assuming you'd be in a better place now if things would have been different. But with what you believed at the time, if you hadn't gone down that path with those people, you'd have only been open to a very similar path with very similar people and would be in about the same spot now. So you can forever regret not knowing what you couldn't have known before you learned it, or you can realize that you have earned that wisdom and make your life the best it can possibly be with it from now, on." - Doe Zantamata

  • @cactusraymonxdxx3043
    @cactusraymonxdxx3043 2 года назад +3

    It feels weird watching this after suggesting it on your instagram live hahaha

  • @alisonpoochie2737
    @alisonpoochie2737 2 года назад

    I've been painting and drawing lately. I find it helps with my mental health, as I have been struggling. Art therapy definitely helps me.

  • @joeybarrelwilde
    @joeybarrelwilde 2 года назад +2

    Felling guilty about your past is normal.

  • @jgms258
    @jgms258 2 года назад

    Wishing you were moving to CO so we could be friends, your energy is so calming and strong! You have a lot of wisdom to offer the world ❤ these videos give me a lot to think about in my own life

  • @celinapalfrey6001
    @celinapalfrey6001 2 года назад +1

    You’re very inspiring Cam

  • @ianarmstrong8589
    @ianarmstrong8589 2 года назад

    You have come along way in the past 2 years and are going to achieve much more in life from now on.
    You Cameryn are special and have many good goals to come in your life ahead with your beautiful girls.
    Be bold be strong and have great faith in Jesus and put your trust in him Liz A England

  • @naudiatorres9763
    @naudiatorres9763 2 года назад +1

    I loved this video! It felt like we were just hanging out and talking! Thank you for sharing

  • @joyr4461
    @joyr4461 2 года назад +1

    I needed to hear that thank you

  • @maceyrussell8652
    @maceyrussell8652 2 года назад +1

    You are amazing person keep pushing and doing what you love

  • @ChereeDawn
    @ChereeDawn 2 года назад +1

    Hopefully you can give all that hard learned wisdom to your girls. That’s the circle of life. You live and you learn. When you know better you do better. It’s a waste if you don’t teach it to the humans that came through you, to learn your lessons easier.

  • @kayylaford9202
    @kayylaford9202 2 года назад

    You gave me a good cry, I need to listen to you more often

  • @cassidyscarlett4899
    @cassidyscarlett4899 2 года назад +1

    Damn I didn't know how much I needed to hear this ♡ Thank you cam; I wish you all the best ♡♡

  • @phenomena3491
    @phenomena3491 2 года назад

    It appears that there is an extreme focus of attention and preoccupation on your feelings about yourself; so much so that it prevents the happiness and enjoyment that many others experience in life.
    There is the realm of yourself and what you believe that to be. The time spent concentrating on this can consume your ability to connect to the other realm. The other realm is the vast world outside of yourself. Those who connect to this world outside of themselves can be rewarded with a sense of excitement and yearning to explore which has the potential to last a lifetime. To be deprived of this ability is cause to seek a remedy that can restore a resumption of taking this path which leads to what can be considered the ultimate source of happiness.

  • @donetta9972
    @donetta9972 2 года назад

    Hi I saw you at the Florida farmers market I was so happy to see you today and it made my day I didn't say hi I was being shy but I saw you

  • @kenneditompkins3609
    @kenneditompkins3609 2 года назад +2

    Amazing Video! I love your channel keep up the good work girl Cam your super beautiful Collette Is pretty!!! Deliah Is just drop dead gorgeous!!!!! I Love You Very Very Much!!!!!!

  • @StaceyHeathxoxo
    @StaceyHeathxoxo 2 года назад +1

    Just a spoonful of medicine….🎵🎤🥁🎹🎸🎻

  • @theblackeyedpeawithtams701
    @theblackeyedpeawithtams701 2 года назад

    It’s so funny because I just put a post on Facebook of 4 pages of doodles and ask Facebook “does anyone else out there in Facebook land just sit and doodle names, blocks, stars, numbers and alphabet…I do this all the time :) I wonder it means when you’re Doodler lol I even write the animals names in our family ha ha

  • @robloxking920
    @robloxking920 2 года назад +1

    your drawings are so cool!

  • @beinamysawa7458
    @beinamysawa7458 2 года назад

    I love you Cam, you're so strong mom for your beautiful girls. You're so amazing mom.

  • @pollymanning1462
    @pollymanning1462 2 года назад

    Stay happy and brave cam

  • @siennakay3922
    @siennakay3922 2 года назад

    i love this concept for a video

  • @aguilar92brenda
    @aguilar92brenda 2 года назад +1

    Talk to your obgyn to request your meds. Mine prescribed me the ones I take and they have really helped💕

  • @adrianangel1227
    @adrianangel1227 2 года назад +1

    You inspired me to start drawing again

  • @oliviaclark4269
    @oliviaclark4269 2 года назад

    you inspire me everyday

  • @inezsorto7791
    @inezsorto7791 2 года назад +1

    You’re so beautiful sweetheart. Very strong take care god blessing

  • @mirandawillie6909
    @mirandawillie6909 2 года назад +1

    Hi Carmyn I love watching your vlogs your girls have grown so much Dee and Coco are getting so big everyday it won't be long Dee will be starting school soon I know what is like to lose someone my mom lost her dad when she was only 3 she barely remembered her dad it was really hard for my mom and her silbings my mom went through the same thing as you and your girls did I hope you are enjoying this hot weather well you get hotter weather then anyone else around the USA I hope you are having a wonderful day how are you Carmyn?

  • @aprilkearby6963
    @aprilkearby6963 2 года назад

    Cam i wish you and the girls all best ❤ 💕 💓 you can get through anything

  • @shyejohanneson9544
    @shyejohanneson9544 2 года назад

    Hi I'm supper happy you. A doing video s and and I've wachid u video from the start

  • @ninaa1077
    @ninaa1077 2 года назад

    Wow this really helped me thank you

  • @ej-uv5tz
    @ej-uv5tz 2 года назад +1

    you are so strong and such an amazing mother. thank you for all the content !

  • @kudos2kam75
    @kudos2kam75 2 года назад +1

    hey:)) i’m not sure if this helps, but if you struggle with seasonal depression at all i’d suggest vitamin c tablets [ or b i can’t remember:( ] i’ve heard that they help with that, and hopefully it can help you out for a little while before you can start meds 💓 much love

  • @jadeydoodle
    @jadeydoodle 2 года назад +2

    pov u helped her decide what kind of video to do today from her morning live 😋😋

  • @AidenGibson-f8t
    @AidenGibson-f8t Год назад

    I love your😊 videos 📷

  • @IttyBittyKnittyJessa
    @IttyBittyKnittyJessa 2 года назад

    What you are describing as over sharing all past versions and all u have been thru.. is known as trauma bonding. And its a form of codependency. Its a very very healthy step to move into building healthy relationships, versus trauma bound co-dependent relationships. You can be proud of all your seasons in life! Because learning how to be a strong healthy adult is learned, for some we learn the hard way and thats okay. You should be proud of yourself, this sounds like healing 🤍

  • @jlcjourney378
    @jlcjourney378 2 года назад

    Hey cam if you see this I just wanted to let you know (being a canna mom myself) that I’ve been honest with doctors and told them that I partake and they have told me that there is not a antidepressant that works while you partake in that activity. Not to discourage you because I would love to have both as well but my doctor has told me I have to choose between one or the other because the canna and the medication just counteract each other in your brain. I always wondered why I didn’t feel like the antidepressants aren’t working even while being on the strongest version and now I understand. Just letting you know so you don’t struggle like I didn’t with “why is this not working”

  • @fiona.lilpeep
    @fiona.lilpeep 2 года назад +1

    I love your sit down videos!🌻 From itsyourgirlcamryn

  • @lexymitchell5317
    @lexymitchell5317 2 года назад +1

    Love yu boo ❤️❤️❤️

  • @joyceglace340
    @joyceglace340 2 года назад

    I just heard a church message talking about How you can say you are this and that and you will be,if U speek ur depressed U will be If U say u sick U will be 🙄Plus not healthy for the girls to hear ! LOOK UP Laren Dangle Christian artists and turn it up and u and the girls PRAISE JESUS 🙏🏻🙌🙌🙌🥰😳❤

  • @lexin3414
    @lexin3414 Год назад

    You are a great drawer!

  • @melodiethornock1406
    @melodiethornock1406 2 года назад

    My family Dr. Prescribes my meds for depression with no problem.

  • @everyonexme
    @everyonexme 2 года назад

    We love you bb
    Also it doesn't matter but second

  • @maggiecreech411
    @maggiecreech411 2 года назад

    love you babe!!

  • @emmybeecher5698
    @emmybeecher5698 2 года назад +2

    i know you don’t live in utah but i’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety and there are some amazing doctors out by me. So if doctors don’t work out maybe you can get in touch with me and i can possibly help.

  • @kaydj533
    @kaydj533 2 года назад +1

    Love you❤️

  • @BrittBratt2You
    @BrittBratt2You 2 года назад +1

    💚