LIFE IS LIFIN' | REAL TALK | HOPE VS HOPELESS
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- Опубликовано: 8 фев 2025
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I fuxx with you real hard for your authenticity. And I'm ngl, I'm lowkey upset at some of our popular faves who still outchea peddling 'stuff' when the current political climate is a dumpster fire. Like sis, we love the fashun/lifestyle content but can y'all take a moment to acknowledge that we're sad and scared. And this is where you come in Carolyn. Thanks for giving us the fun, the fashun and the real life 'ish. We here with you. Personally, I don't have anything specific that I want to see from you, just keep being you!💜
Male cookie here. It’s okay to feel overwhelmed and scared during this time of uncertainty. Just remember to keep the faith and breathe. Prayers to Carlos and his family. Yours as well! ❤
@@Steven_Travis Thanks! male cookie. Awesome words of encouragement. Thank so much, well said.💜🙏🏾💜
Carolyn, we all at different stages of stress, and life. May I suggest you set up a therapy session for you and your partner to address the situation you are both going through. Men do deal with (ignore evade, push down) things differently but if you are looking to plan a future together this issue of communication especially now should be addressed. It's the right thing to do for you both.
Take more time for YOURSELF and if you want to create content around your new SELF CARE routine that helps you feel empowered, connected, grounded and strong that would probably be cool for many cookies who of course are on the same road as you are.
Keep you chin up. You are LOVED!
giiiirl i was literally just crying to my therapist today about the political climate. it got REAL DARK ... she had to reel me in and make me breathe for like 2 minutes. Black women are NOT OK. U are absolutely not alone.
Sis just cast your vote, we cannot change people’s opinions, all we can do is to continue to pray. I don’t talk about politics, I do want I’m going to do, and I keep it going. You have a lot going on . Just take a step back ,and do what you’re going to do, pray and let go and let God!!💜🙏🏾💜
Hi Carolyn! I agree with you about the stress and strain surrounding the election.
As a black woman in America and a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority , Inc., of course i support Harris. In fact i have already cast my vote early. I have lost friendships over this election and 4 years ago! I am stuck thinking that I can not be friends with someone who votes for a candidate that wants to hurt me and my people. Period.
I agree Soror. This is a moral issue to me. How can anyone of color forget everything that happened on this man’s watch when he was in the white house. From covid, to Jan 6 to the race riots…how is this an issue?
PERIOD!! and I love me some Pink and Green unity!!!
@ thank you!! ♥️
@ let me find out you too are an AKA!! N
Love you babe! I’m around if you need to talk and you’re def not alone 🫶🏾
🥺 When the favs check-in and connect ❤
🥹💚 yes my love. Thank you so much 😩 👀 ima hit you up.
Depression is a slithery little demon and I wish we could snap our fingers and be rid of it but life is just moving so fast. Im sorry you had to experience a toxic parent but glad you cemented boundaries because no one needs chaos in their life. Especially on top of being a care giver! I hope that you are able to overcome the depression chasing you and find peace that cannot be bothered. Thank you for making time for me.
Carolyn, this sixty-something subscriber from your hometown can certainly understand your angst about what's happening in the world and what's happening in your personal life. Let me just say that life has its ebbs and flows and we just have to ride the waves without resistance but with resilience. Life will get better. In the meantime, men are not the best at processing their emotions and I'm sure Carlos is overwhelmed much like yourself. Find a good friend who can lend an ear when you need to vent and can offer sound advice when you need it. As far as the election goes, I consider it God's business to handle and we'll all survive no matter the outcome. Take care of yourself.
Thank you so much my dear.
I'm not sure we'll all survive no matter the outcome, but I appreciate your sentiments overall. Much love.
Hey Cookie I will tell you what a psychiatrist told me when I was going through the worst time of my life (I was going through divorce, custody, loosing my business of 27 years and loosing my house) all at the same time. She told me to put my “Big Girl “ panties on 😂 I was like this B is crazy and I need a second opinion! But after the dust settled I can look back and see that she was right! Life isn’t fair. Life ain’t easy and you have to take each day at a time and sometimes moment to moment! For me I dug in deep in my prayer life and it became my daily life and learned what God was trying to teach me! To walk by faith and not by sight! Because what I know about us Virgo’s we have a need to be in control… and we generally don’t let go and let God! Get in a quiet place and talk to Him truly and don’t be shocked when He shows up 😊 yes give Carlos some grace because he does have a lot on his plate. After I was getting back on my feet life took another turn because that’s what life does! So stay in a place of gratitude and trust in God! Look at Carlos’s shoes, Momma Chellia’s shoes and your shoes… whose shoes do you want to be in??? I’ve been the caregiver and the patient… caregiver is much easier 😊 there are no magic words but to put your Big Girl panties on and go through… there is the other side 😊❤🙏 but life is a series of overcomings……and Cookie I know that you grew up catholic but sometimes you need an old school gospel song to get you through 😊 ruclips.net/video/w8hDR3zs2lQ/видео.htmlsi=fMsbFFEQ5VKqim6V
@@Councils-Girl Good morning, that’s the best song for each of us. Thank you, I needed that today. Be blessed.💜🙏🏾💜
@@sonyagarcia3477 you’re welcome, so glad that you opened up the link 🙏 I listen to it to remind myself that I am safe in His arms 😊❤
Sis. I was caregiver to my momma for the last 14years and she just passed last week. Part of building community is holding each other up when we are vulnerable. Life for all of us f’ing sucks but we will be alright ❤
I’m so sorry for your loss! Sending you prayers, love & light! 🙏🏽🙏🏽
Thank you for posting. I am with you and stressed out as well. I do hope we can move towards unity. I just continue to pray for peace and understanding during these uncertain times.
I'm disowning any family members who vote for him or don't vote at all. Kudos to you for keeping it cute with your family l!
Hey Boo! First, please give yourself some GRACE! You are doing all the things with the tools you have. As someone who experienced the same situation with a significant other, it can be not only overwhelming but exhausting-no matter how great the relationship is with your mate and the person you're supporting in the caretaking space. Carlos is going through his own turmoil, (that's his momma), but men are simply a different beast in terms of communication and feelings. He is having his own internal struggle and you may have to find your pockets to recenter and reconnect. Just continue caring for yourself and staying connected with your close family and friends and doing the things that bring you joy. Next, you cannot control the political views of others, but, no YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN YOUR FEAR FOR SELF AND COUNTRY. I am trying to remain hopeful and steadfast that people will make the best decision for our democracy, women's health, race relations etc. All while not side eyeing friends and family like "You're voting for who?" and audibly asking them "What are you doing with your life?" Lastly, your content is AMAZING because it is authentically you. I personally don't think direction is needed because what we love about your content is that it is accurately an extension of who you are. For example, LOL @ you rolling in the camera view with 500 bottles of brain health supplements from Make Time cause you love us and want us to know about them- It is simply what I love to see! You have been unafraid to showcase your TRUE personality, feelings, dope ass sense of style and vast knowledge of fashion, business and life. Hold your head Big Cookie, we're all gonna be OK.
Welp, Im crying in the most grateful and feeling loved on way! Thank you for this and pouring into me .... but also, why are you making me laugh at my vitamins LOL! I just wanted to make sure y'all knew I got vitamin gummies! Thank you for taking the time for me :)
@ Anytime Boo! We all need to cry and laugh @ the same damn time!! 🤣🤣🤣😘😘😘
Now this, this was everything. Thank you for being vunerable with the cookies. The only way out is through, this is temporary and you will reach the other side. You are doing the best you can with what you have. Try and find some time to take care of you amongst all this, even if its a 10 minute walk outside.
Sis, remember to BREATHE. It's a crazy time, and life be lifin', but sometimes all you can do is know that EVERYBODY STRUGGLES. IT'S NOT JUST YOU! We're all feeling scared about the elections, the chaos to follow, and all the other stuff we've got to deal with. But TAKE TIME to center yourself in joy, faith, hope, and love--even if it's only for a moment. Let it lift you, even if it doesn't last; the good news is that it accumulates and builds if you tend it. God loves you and so does this community you built. Keep giving and be ready to receive your continued blessings. 🙏🏾🥰🫶🏾
thank you so much @marynelson288 and yes I do need to remember to breathe and align myself with that first and always to be able to connect with God.
I'm praying for you, myself, and all of us going through.
It IS better later. I promise you. You'll look back and say, "I don't know HOW I did it - BUT I DID!!! ❤🍪
Life is unexpected. You never know what gems may come out of this season. Life doesn’t always go as planned but be the support you would want during tough times. No season lasts forever.
I am a 41 yo man. I have, since about 15 yo been a caregiver. I assisted my Grandmother with caring for her aunt (my GG Aunt) who was blind with dementia. I assisted my Grandmother with caring for her mother (my G Grandmother) who was an amputee with dementia. And my mother and I cared for that same Grandmother in her last years. It is a test of relationships. It is highly difficult. It is not uncommon for the stress of caregiving to feel like a burden on your relationships with others. But hear this, the pleasure you will find from ensuring your mother-in-law is safe and cared for will outweigh any other thing that could be perceived as negative. Understand that your spirit will pleased knowing that you have made a sacrifice to be of service to your elder. Also, know you MUST take time for yourself. You MUST recharge your own battery. You MUST not be afraid to speak your truth. But in relation to you and Carlos, I think that you both could benefit from scheduling time SOLELY DEDICATED to speaking about your schedules, your emotions, your family, and careers, and how they relate to your MIL’s care. And in that time nothing is off the table, and everything said will be heard and honored.
God bless you, and keep up the great work here and at home
Ohhh I love and appreciate this so much and will share with Carlos as well. I know it's important to take time to recharge, I think I worry more about Carlos not doing so I will try my best to find ways to make him more comfortable to do so :( but Wowwww, 15 years. What an honor you gave. God bless you too and thank you for your support.
I care about women’s rights, I’m sorry that so many women have are already suffering due to the over turning of ROE. They didn’t really think this thing through and how this became a ripple effect on women’s overall healthcare. I care about the economy and do not feel giving tax cuts to the top 1% will help the poor and middle class as it didn’t help us the last time DT was president. I believe the pandemic was poorly handled and scores of people really didn’t have to die. I don’t want to re-elect someone who was not re-elected the first time because of poor policy and lack of basic human decency. The name calling and grimy grievances are crazy. I want someone to move us forward and help restore women’s rights, voting rights, honor our veterans and not think they are suckers and losers. Help to restore our optimism and not prey on folks fears and stoke hatred. I want a leader who will talk about unity, work on upholding the constitution. I don’t believe if I want the best for me, it means I also want something bad to happen to you. What our leaders say out loud matters, character matters, accepting reality matters. Voting matters!
I'm happy you're getting your feelings out. I would like to make a suggestion, please don't allow ANYONE to affect your mood. If your aunt spoke up and you were able to apologize, if needed, dont chasing her, accept itnfor what it is and continue on with your life. If she doesn't answer, stop calling, and if she only responds back to 1 of 50 texts, stop texting at #1. Don't let anyone have ANY power, control, insight, input etc., that can shift/affect you negatively, over you and your life!
Former caregiver for both of my parents for 11 years...just sending you many hugs navigating life lifing....I sometimes see with content creators they shift the content as their life is shifting...I say when you get on camera just speak to YOUR truth..your cookies are here to support. Some days it will be Outfits..some days makeup..etc..but sometimes you may need to just vent..and that's ok too. Take. The caregiving journey as it comes. Evdaday has it's set of challenges. Praying for you guys 🙏🏼
Carolyn,
I'm so glad you're talking about this. My mother passed recently and that is when I realised how important estate planning is. People don't like to think about it, but it's important for all of us, particularly if we have children, to do.
Please know that you are a blessing. In addition to this extremely scary and stressful time in our politics, you have ALOT on your plate. You've moved to a new neighborhood, having to get acclimated to different commutes which means longer train rides to and from the Bronx, you're an entrepreneur - where income may not be consistent, you're in a live-in relationship, you're playing a supportive role as a caretaker - where you're sharing your space which meant adjustments had to be made to conform to that new reality. Girl, that is ALOT. Please give yourself grace and know you're probably doing way better than you may think you are. Over the summer I moved from Brooklyn to PG County, I'm dealing with estate stuff due to losses in my family, I stress eat, I'm overweight, and I'm so scared that the orange you know what may get elected. I early voted last Friday, which was exciting because the lines were so long and folks were so pumped. But you know what helps me get through? This beautiful, funny, entertaining, creative lady named Carolyn who's teaching me how dress lol. Whatever you need to do to feel more whole do it.
❤ Well said.
see this was a comment I needed to wait to come home and wash my makeup off before reading because if I read this at the event I just went to I would've been an emotional mess.... OMG. this made me feel so seen and understood. Thank you so much for this....I think I'm going to show the next person who asks me how Im doing this comment because you understand me in a nutshell!.... and the "orange you know what' took me out LOLOL ugh.... we will see and pray through what happens. Thank you so much for this and your positive energy. Im so sorry that you are dealing with loss, grief, and also having to manage the things that come with that. Just by your writing I can tell that you are blessed and are a blessing and God will see you through this season as well. How do you like PG county???
@@ITSCAROLYNGRAY You're very welcome and thank you. I know it's been said a gazillion times but we gon alright! I'm really liking PG County. I live the right on the Potomac in a walkable neighborhood with the outlet mall near by! Both lifts my mood immensely. New York tugs at my heart so me and Amtrak are besties. Keep up the good work! 🍪🍪🍪🍪
Hey girl, I appreciate you sharing your concerns about the election, work initiatives and family. I am so scared if Trump wins this election. Your fear is felt by nearly every woman I talk with. But God is faithful. Draw on that strength and please place a priority on self care. I can say from personal experience, your body is a finite resource that can collapse if pushed too hard for too long. Prayers coming your way.
Whew.....life! I appreciate you so much for even having this conversation. Not only have I been the most emotional about the current and possible future state of this country, but learning how others feel has also been extremely disappointing. Being a caregiver, mental health and being self aware will send you! Sending you all the positive energy, love and support. Again, thanks for being vulnerable enough to even open up to us. We love you fa'real!
It’s honestly refreshing seeing someone be vulnerable and honest about real stuff and that they’re struggling. I love that you brought mental and physical health into it. Idk what to suggest as far as content but more of this. I’m sending you love and strength during this hard time! You’re doing amazing things!
Carolyn, praying that God gives you the strength and endurance to move through this difficult time. 🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾 What you are going through is tough, but you will come out of it victorious. You have a right to your thoughts and emotions. Stay true to yourself and lean into your parents and those that love and support you. As for your content, I enjoy your fashion commentary and seeing your unique fashion finds and styling. Keep shining through, Cookie! 🌟❤️🌟
My mom is suffering from early onset dementia so I understand. Sending you all some prayers… you have a community here!
Carolyn, thank you for being so honest with your feelings and current mental status. Life is definitely life-ing for you right now, but can I tell you how gracious you present in spite of it all? And can I suggest that you make sure you extend that grace to yourself as well? And God bless you for wanting to pressing on and continue to be consistent with content creation but if a pause from it for a couple of episodes would serve you well, I’m sure that all of your cookies would hold a space for you to catch up with yourself and restore some mental health. We love you sis!
Also, as far as direction/ideas for videos… I was personally OBSESSED with your inspo outfits video - you did one recently where you showed the inspo photo, and then shopped your closet to put together outfits that were inspired by it. It was sooo good and so inspiring. I could watch videos like that from you daily - your talent with styling and your taste really are something special❤
Mom of two and wife and Realtor - I feel the feeling of overwhelm. And thank you for addressing political issues. So - I’ve been married for 12 years. On the relationship front - make sure you and your boyfriend/partner take time for just you two. Set it as a boundary - at least during this time - and keep communicating - even if it’s an argument here and there - communication is KEY. Continue to check in with each other during those appointed times. Me and my husband have a saying - that we hit from another older couple - even if the world is falling apart - as long as we are okay- that’s all that matters ❤hope that helps some 😊
Yup! I’m scared too! I already voted. I remember the 2016-2020. It was an awful, stressful time. I absolutely do not want to go back.
I did help care for my MIL, however, my husband and is sister hired a nurse to help out, plus she went to adult daycare. So I only had to pitch in on the weekends. Perhaps hiring a nurse can take some of the load off you and Carlos?
I love your content. That’s why I’m subscribed to your channel. Meaning if you want to do a “let’s clear my head” video, then I’ll watch. If you want to visit thrift stores, then I’ll watch. If you want to take me around NYC then I’ll watch. I’ll watch you talk about what makes a high quality garment.
Last I know Q4 is on your back. Try to pace yourself, and make sure that you are only taking the work that YOU want to do. Take mini breaks when you feel that weight is too heavy to carry.❤
Thank you so much my dear. Carlos and his sister are looking into ensuring they can get an aid for her if needed after she comes out of PT so that is in the works. He did pay for an aid when she lived in North Carolina so its just a matter of finding someone trustworthy:(
And I appreciate you making time for me and watching. I think I will try an array of concepts and content to share because there will be so many things happening during the holiday season. Im hoping I will be able to limit my commitments during the next few weeks in a way that keeps me sane.
Thank you so much for your transparency. So many points have resonated, you’re not alone! I commend you for showing up authentically always! I really do enjoy what you give us but for a little razzle dazzle I’d say definitely more safe space updates tap in so we can hear you and more of you connecting w/ brands/interviewing on fashion!!!
Hi Carolyn! My heart goes out to you regarding all that you are experiencing physically and emotionally right now. You seem very empathetic and it’s refreshing. Thanks for sharing your life experience on here…you seem so emotionally aware! Hope you can keep taking care of yourself and your heart during these challenging days for you…sounds like you have wonderful tools to turn to and hope you find the right therapist.
I work with individuals who experience anxiety and depression so I’m aware and wanted to say hello and you are not alone in this. This election time has taken a strain on so many of us. ❤
I am your subscriber from Europe (German speaker) ... we are also in a state of expectation, nobody knows what tomorrow will bring and planning is impossible... everyone thinks, if only I can get through this winter without rockets flying over my head while I freeze to death in my apartment because I can't afford the heating with rising costs. Our management does not listen to our wishes... it won't end well, that's guaranteed... as far as your relationship is concerned, follow your heart! If you are unhappy and it is too much, change it... confront your partner with it and change it, otherwise there will be a bang that will hurt more than a clean cut (speaking from experience) I subscribed to you back in the days when you had a small, stuffed closet... you were funny, full of ideas, every outfit was awesome... I miss you a little bit again, so relaxed and funny... unburdened (nobody is ever completely unburdened, but you didn't have the feeling that it was a ton of weight on your back)
First of Carolyn Carlos, his family, and us cookies are so fortunate to have you in our lives…I just wanted to let you know how deeply I connect with you and how much your work means to me. I see so much of myself in your journey, and it’s been a gift to follow along and learn from your strength, honesty, and heart. It’s okay to struggle, and even recognizing that you’re in a tough place is such a powerful step toward healing. Please remember that, just as you’ve shown up for us, I’ll always be here for you, cheering you on. This moment, like all others, will pass. Just keep being you-that’s all any of us could ask for. 💛"
Sending love and hope that things start looking up for her soon!
I think that its so important that you said “We need to think about we need, rather than the pasts of these people.” I too believe that sooo many are hung up on that and its blinding them from making in my opinion, wise decisions when voting or not voting, from looking at what both candidates have verbally stated their looking to do for the ppl. I just dont believe it should be complicated.
And let me just add, no you’re not alone with the feels of hopelessness. Im right there with you and have been for quite some time. Its been a 4 year battle for me especially as a creative and juggling a new life that I prayed for. Stay strong and continue to lean on God, we’ll get through this.❤️
It’s going to be okay Carolyn. No matter what, God is still on the throne. I voted early. I voted for Kamala. Of course I don’t know everything but I know enough about policies that affect me/us. I also see that Trump’s base primarily is voting for white supremacy. Full stop. Any black or brown person needs to consider what that means for their safety. Lastly, after my Dad transitioned, we constantly have family planning discussions. I want you to do (content) what brings you peace and joy.
Hello, as a caregiver myself, I always try to look at it from an inner lense. Know one knows what and when it could be us needing the same care and grace. Patience is definitely key. Just know God does'nt give us more than we can bare he actually gives it to the strong ones, and sometimes it's our test to pass. I pray that it gets easier for you both and stay blessed because you are truly a blessing to the person you're caring for. I like yourself had a living space that was just big enough for myself, and through this journey, I've moved to a place way bigger wasn't in my plan, but look at GOD.
Videos like this are also what I love from your channel! The real life real talk. These chats might be what you need as well. As I watch your glamrous chill yet choatic-feeling fashion videos, I wonder how you really feel about things in general. The comment section has been beautiful, too.
Thanks for being real. It’s a lot going on and patience is definitely necessary as well as communication. Sometimes communication can be difficult and so all must come to the table with an open mind. I’ll pray for your relationship and family. Be blessed.
Carolyn, I appreciate your honesty & vulnerability in this video. We are all dealing with our own stuff & it can sometimes feel that we are alone, but this video certainly helped. Please continue being your transparent & authentic self no matter what content you make & we will continue to support you! My thoughts & prayers are with you & Carlos! Trouble doesn't last always...you got this!
This is beautiful. When I am going through those life challenges I read the bible and pray (honestly it keeps me going). Most importantly you have to keep moving. Go for a walk/run, ride a bike, at home Pilates, therapy and prioritize self care. Its okay to be scared. On the content side more fashion break downs (I love Pinterest fashion and how you interpreted it to your style), fashion news, re styling old wardrobe favs.
Thank you so much for sharing! I know it’s not easy to be vulnerable to the public but man…you are so relatable it’s scary. You asked what we would like to see in addition to the vlogs and fashion and honestly, listening to these talks are really therapeutic for me. I know that’s not necessarily your intention but it is. To know I’m not the only one going through..life..is so comforting so thank you.
I’m not a care giver officially but I am, my biggest lesson is you gotta have something for yourself- whether that’s therapy, exercise, a long walk something. I honestly think that’s gonna be the only thing that will keep you going. I think in this season we’re going through some thing/s! I hope you get thru this with yourself still in 1 piece 🤗
Voting matters! 💙
I’m raising 3 Black young boys ages 19,15,6 and running a consulting business so I feel your stresses. I tap into my ancestors when I feel overwhelmed. Continue to pull from their strength and remember to give myself grace. ❤
Hi Carolyn! I'm a new subscriber and proud new member of the Cookie 🍪 Club! I just wanted to reach out after watching your recent video. It’s really meaningful that you’re taking the time to acknowledge and process everything you’re going through. Sharing it with us connects us on a much deeper level beyond fashion, and I truly appreciate that.
I also came across something on Headspace, Politics without Panic, that might be helpful, especially with everything you're balancing. And if you believe in God, remember this season won’t last forever. New mercies, new horizons, and grace are always there, all ways and always. Take care, and thank you for sharing your journey with us. ❤️
Samantha ❤😊
hi carolyn, i relate to a lot of the things you said in this video. times are hard, family planning is always stressful, and navigating other people's emotions is a constant puzzle. there's no way to do it "Right" you can only try your best and forgive yourself for whatever you get wrong. keep ur head up chief!
I absolutely LoVe you🌹Your transparency…& your alignment of truth within yourself. I thank you🍪
I will add you to my prayer list Sis. Caregiving is a tough job…I’ve been one for several years. I will echo what others have stated with regard to the political climate…I tend to move in silence and advocate where it will be effective. (You also learn who people are).
Yes, Queen. Life has been LIFINING and Adulting can be rough with this election is LOT but we have to walk our on Path and still LOVED and RESPECTED their choices ❤
TRANSITION in a new place can be a lot but it will get better. Love you for being so TransPARENT and sharing your feelings with the cookies 🍪 community ❤
THANK YOU! Just the fact that you had the balls to bring up what's happening and how you feel about this political situation made me a NEW SUBSCRIBER! No one wants to address any of this. Not to mention how you're feeling and what's happening in your life. I appreciate your "realness" and your vulnerability. It is beautiful and refreshing. We are all having strains in our life. You are not alone, babe. Love your channel as it is. An idea for a video; let Carlos rate your outfits (if u haven't done yet)
Hello Carolyn 💕🤗
Sending you so much love through this difficult time.
I can understand the frustration of loving someone and having a difficult time with communicating your feelings or feeling like there isn’t a right time to because they have a lot on their plate. I actually have been in a similar space recently and started working on grounding techniques like short guided meditation and daily devotionals which really help with finding encouragement and reminding me to lean into my relationship with my spirit and God. I would highly recommend starting a little 10/15 minute ritual for yourself to help set the tone for better days. And by nature it helped with finding other pockets of time throughout the day, so now I also do a midday 30 min yoga practice and an evening workout. I believe this helps with stabilizing my stress levels and relieving dark emotions. I too am an earth sign (Capricorn) and we have the same rising and moon sign! So I think I do get a lot about how you experience emotions and keep depression at bay. I get being a rock to people in my world but also kind of needing the people I need to be there. Just remind yourself these feelings aren’t you and are temporary. Please try to find 5 minutes for yourself to just have space for breathing/prayer/calm. There’s an eye in the middle of the storm. 💕
Also your hair looks great! I love the rambling content because I feel seen and felt lol I am literally kee-keeing with you. Hauls and styling videos are obviously amazing. Or just hearing you unpack things. You keep me company during my wfh when I’m all alone lol
Your not alone. We are all going through it. Everyday is a challenge in a different way. The constant feeling of overwhelm and hopelessness.
Caregiving is something that’s taxing emotionally, mentally, and physically. Been there and done that..
Maybe set aside time or have a date night to talk about how your really feeling so you both can have a moment of “unwind” to truly vent and let out what your feeling. Its harder with men since they arent always the greatest at being expressive at times.
It may be a tough convo but communication is key to get through this challenge and will help with you both feeling heard and seen.
Hang in there. ❤️
My prayers are with you as you navigate through your caregiver journey. I took care of my Mom the last eight years of her life with no help from family. She had dementia and leukemia. I moved my Mom in to live with me three years before she passed. The journey was hard, sad, stressful, beautiful, joy filled, and magical…sometimes it was all those things in the same day.
My Mom passed two years ago. Memories of our time together sustain me. Being a caregiver is an honor. Only few are chosen. I feel so incredibly blessed that God chose me walk with my Mom as she traveled her final leg of the race.
It’s often hard to see the beauty and feel the joy when you’re in the thick of it. But simply trust that the joy and beauty are there.
I pray God will give you patience, clarity, wisdom , compassion and peace as you provide the best care possible for your mother in law.
Give yourself all the grace!!!! You can get lost in the caregiving role. I did and still trying to find my new space in life after my Mom transitioned. You have to seek balance ✨️
Yes I am a caregiver for Mom who, btw, will be 99 this November. The journey is real. I'll keep you ALL in my prayers Cookie.❤️🙏
You aren’t alone in this C. What’s happening around us is so disheartening and worrying. The hate developing around is heartbreaking. I stopped watching the news for my own sanity and have been meditating a lot to calm myself and breathe through situations. Regarding content I love when you plan for the week, take us with you on your meetups, take high fashion and how we can recreate it using our regular clothes 🤣🥰🥰
Remember… This too shall pass. God doesn’t put more on you than you can handle. Be thankful you are Blessed to be a Blessing. Cherish this moment in your life. Trust me Carlos & family appreciate you. Keep being your authentic self.
CG, it took me three days to watch this video because I knew I would cry in some capacity. First, I want to give you your flowers 💐. You continue to show up as your true and authentic self, and continue to pour into us. I knew that this season would challenge not only Carlos but you as well. Watching previous episodes, you have continued to talk about showing up for yourself, and I encourage you to do so despite the outside world. I have faith in you and in Carlos, and though it may seem tough right now, every season has a reason and a purpose. Winter is sometimes bitter, so spring can flourish. Second, I too am terrified of what will happen soon; I try my best to not think so hard about it, but I do. As a cookie of the LGBT+ community, I feel there so much of my life at risk. As a child of a mother with mental needs, I fear I will have to fight even harder for her. The uncertainty of it all is unbearable, but the blessings exist. Us having this community. You, again, pouring into us, so we can pour back into you; gives me hope for us. This community is light. Lastly, I love your vlogs, I enjoy walking around with you and eating 😂 I enjoy your take on trends that will last past the hype. I will think of more once the tears chill. Just know you are loved unconditionally by your 🍪s and we will knuck if they buck.
Thank you for being unapologetically honest and trusting, you are not alone in this process, you are navigating uncharted territory and doing a phenomenal job!!! Remember to be still and give yourself grace. I see a lot of caretaker burn out and the one thing we always talk about is the sense of loss of self and loss of purpose throughout the process, gotta remember that taking time for you isn’t selfish, saying No isn’t selfish
This resonates! Everything seems to be out of whack. I'm struggling with my relationship with my mom which has always been contentious. I also feel like I'm close to the point where the depression is winning.
im sorry that you and your mother's relationship feels that way. I pray that you two have a breakthrough because life isn't promised. And with the seasons changing and everything happening it is so important for us to seek therapy, or connect with nature and move our bodies to keep depression away. Sending you a virtual hug, we got this !
This was the most authentic, raw and real postings. If there was any other content to create it would be more of these. Connecting on a humanity level
I really appreciate this video! Your honesty and vulnerability is refreshing. Yes I’m stressed about the Election! And I’m going through a new life change which is needed but scary. My kids are grown doing their own thing so I realize I need to focus on me. Life is happening everyday everywhere. Let’s do more of these types of videos whenever u need them. Appreciate u so much! Hang on in there!!!❤❤❤
Just a simple THANK YOU!!! In my heart you are my little sister and I learn so so much from watching you. I am anxious also about the politics of this country...I am counting days at this point. Best of everything to Carlos's mom, and to him and his sister for figuring out support. And big vibes of support to you. I heard EVERYTHING you were saying. As a women in my 50's (but still 30 in my head and looking great as I am told) I have seen a lot. I hear you about the role you play here. Stay true to yourself. Shut out the noise. Follow your heart and gut! And again, No Noise! 💜💜💜
Oh Carolyn ❤ it is a tough season we’re all navigating right now. Girl.. I cannot even begin to lay it all out BUT know this patiently give yourself grace and continue to put one step in front of the other. Do not put pressure on yourself to be all things to everything at this time. Just do one thing that matters most to you for today and do another tomorrow. One day at a time. This season will pass. That I know for sure and we will all come out victorious and healthy ❤ sending you love from 🇬🇧 UK (yeah you got British cookies 🍪 too 😅)
Hi ! Thank you soo much for being you and authentic. This is my first comment ever. Excuse my English, French is my first language.
I am really scared for the election and all black people and I am from Montréal in Canada 🇨🇦, can you imagine. I hope you find a way to live through your situation and not just survive.
I love your content about fashion, your opinion about the industry, how to style, what you love or discovered....
Thrust yourself, it got you that far !
You hit a nerve tonight, I'm fully crying, and thats the first time in months.... it's so scary. And I don't even live in the states!!! Thanks for the therapysession! Thanks for sharing about everything, politics ,family bonds and relationship. Real! ❤
Hey Carolyn, I definitely can relate to you in this situation with the election. I don’t care for either candidate so I will definitely pray for guidance. I’m praying for you, Carlos and his family. Please stick with him in this situation because it’s hard. God will see you both through.
Thank you for your honesty about what you’re feeling. It’s hard for us Virgos to admit that we sometimes are not okay and don’t have everything together. That said, to your question about what we want to see…I love when you try things on and style things up. Please keep doing that and showing your personal style and your POV on style and fashion. Also, please do sprinkle in days out and about in NY city. I live in Chicago, another big city, but live to see urban scenes and people I like and admire navigating those spaces.
During my morning prayer, praying for our country is always included. You're right that many of us are feeling a bit apprehensive about what's going to happen next week. But every day I have to remember that ultimately, God is in control and regardless of what happens next week, we'll be okay. Thanks for sharing. I'll be praying for you, and Carlos and his mom. And what a blessing that you've made contact with your aunt. That's good. 🙂
Sending you lots of love and good vibes. Please extend yourself grace. It sounds like the season that you are in requires a lot mentally but don’t forget it’s temporary. We’re here for the random talks if that fills your cup in the moment. You are discussing topics that a lot of people haven’t had to navigate but you are helping to start the thought process around being a care taker for aging parents while staying sane.
I am a caregiver to a 70 year old Guyanese cancer/stroke survivor who doesn’t listen 😒 while finding my footing after a divorce and getting a handle around co-parenting. 🗣️ NOTHING prepared me for this. But remembering my why, meditating, allowing time to laugh, and disconnect from socials has helped with my mental health. I’ve also tried every adaptogen ever created for stress management 🤭
You have a great community of people behind you that love and support you.
Hey Carol, let life situations be what they are. Don’t try to control them. You’re doing the best you can with the resources you have available. Just breathe..
Thank you for talking through this with us. It helps me to know I am not alone in this.
Thank you my Virgo sister for your transparency ❤❤❤ I am a true Virgo thru and thru, I know how you are feeling. Please find you another therapist for the season that you’re in…… You are one of my favorite content creator ❤❤❤ Stay strong and remember you are first🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 Stay prayed up🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 You will get to the other side🙏🏽 Much Love❤
I LOVE your content 🤗! Just voted today & yes between the war, the news & election life has been extremely overwhelming. I think since 2020 everyone has been feeling different…one of your talents is that you come across extremely relatable. I think you’re growing quickly because it’s easy for people to see you as someone who could be their friend so I would say maybe more lifestyle content. I enjoy when you take us with shopping & to events
Thank you my darling and YES TO CASTING A VOTE! and yes, 2020 was a turning point for sure.
I will for sure have event experiences to share with the holidays coming up so I will continue to share that for sure. I also have an idea for shopping vlogs.... stay tuned and thank you for making time for me.
Hey sweetie! Thanks for sharing. Take a moment to just sit and give yourself a hug. You are doing an amazing job caretaking and supporting Carlos. I'm glad you are going to vote and find someone who can guide you through the journey. Just know that you will be okay, your feelings are real and I have experienced where you are in life. Know that some of what you're experiencing is a type of grief. Things in your orbit are changing, there is no template, it looks unfamiliar and it's scary. Please trust and believe, God will walk you through this journey and while some days are harder than others, you will feel his presence. You are experiencing very normal feelings. From one Virgo to another.......be still and know that God is with you. Love you!
this does feel like grief... omg.... I did forget we grieve many things outside of death. This is so true. And yes, Im going to be more intentional about being still so I can connect with God's guidance. Thank you for this :)
Thank you for being transparent about your situation. I am experiencing one of the toughest seasons of my life as well and have felt a little hope and fear. In terms of what I would love to see more on your channel, I really enjoy your fashion talks, and what’s going on in the apparel industry.❤ in my opinion, your work experience in the fashion space has been a great differentiator as a content creator which is one of the reasons why I come to your channel specifically. Hope this helps!❤
This video shows the reality and human side of life. Timing and placement you are reaching those of us who need you. Definitely brain fog over here and I believe I’m operating in functional depression.
Carolyn! Girl you remind me of one of my best friends. I hear you on all of it. Life gets really heavy sometimes when dealing with so much. I have dealt on and off with depression and lately it’s been chasing me. I have already cut out one toxic parent. I have dealt with being a caregiver of another and it can be so f-ing hard at times. Trying to juggle all the things knowing inside you are breaking but trying to look strong. You are not alone. Come on to New Orleans and let’s grab us a drink. For your content I really enjoyed when you covered different trends you were seeing in some of the fashion shows. (Got the screenshots) and maybe just styling basic pieces for the fall. That’s all I got. Sending love ❤❤
Carolyn my Girl, Do What your intuition says to you, let everyone else make their choice. As we say in the Caribbean, "What you buy, you Wear"
Thank you for being transparent in this space when you didn't have to be. You have hit on areas we are all feeling in the current political climate - angry, frustration, anxious, helpless, hopeful, optimistic, cautious, engaged etc. it's mentally and physically exhausting. PLUS the family dynamics you are dealing with compound these feelings. The best advice I could give is to BE STILL! People handle stress differently Carlos will come to you when he needs you. Love means being respectful, understanding, prioritizing and compromising without losing YOURSELF! So be still for a moment and the proper direction will show itself. As for content ideas - I would love to see you share how you work in our creative spaces like clothing designs or how you go about picking tea flavors or CBD. Thank you for creating a genuine space on your platform.
Carolyn your my auntie in my mind!!!!! SENDING love ❤️ and light ✨✨✨. Please update us because we are all struggling and you open and honest about it.
I am not sure if I remember correctly, but I remember you working in the fashion industry (as in your job before being a content creator) and I would love hearing your experience. I bet there are so many different topics to talk about. And it's always interesting hearing people talk about exepriences one doesnt have.
Also: seasons. They pass and better ones will come. That's for sure - it's the thing about seasons. I bet you're doing great
I love this, I will delve into that topic :) thank you
and seasons... there are better ones to come
thank you for this.
Love this vid just raw emotion and truth. We all are feeling a bit overwhelmed and anxious right now. Well done you for sharing Carlos situation and he need to recognise that and help you through any issues you are having. Sit and discuss any issues that has affected your home . I pray you feel better soon .we are living in an extremely troubled time at the moment as over the world. Do something nice for yourself and make you feel happy. Great content ❤️❤️❤️💯💯💯🫶🏿🫶🏿🫶🏿👍🏿👍🏿👍🏿👍🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿
i can completely relate to how you are feeling, I have been so worried about the current state of this country, it seems so bad so I'm praying we don't have to deal with that guy again. I'm also a caregiver for my dad who also has fluid in his brain, it's very hard but it's worth it. When it comes to being a caregiver you have to be super patient but you also need some down time just to release all that stress. Also my dad has dementia but he loves your videos, your funny and your style is everything. Thank you for your content it helps us get through the day. love your styling , would love for you to do more videos like "how to use outfit inspo" , that one was so good hope you do more of those. I also love the ones with you trying to find the perfect jeans etc. you are such an inspiration
thank you
It’s okay to not be okay. One day at a time. During this time of uncertainty the key is to keep your faith and align with the people and things that bring you peace, love, joy and happiness. Sending you love and light 💞
Whewww…chile this is relatable content and I appreciate you sharing your feelings with us…what MJ said, “you are not alone” I’m praying for you and me both the strength to overcome our life challenges and hope that we can come out on top! Also I love your vlogs and you just living and being you ❤
Hey Hun, IG cookie here. Just sending ❤. We are all in this space. I did early voting and at this point don’t want to see not one more ad on tv/internet etc! I’m over it. Just know feeling your feelings are natural. With regard to your relationship or communication in general, there is no good time. What’s most important is that it’s a safe space. Praying for y’all and the caregiver situation too.
Hi Cookie Carolyn. Thanks for sharing. Being a caregiver ,supporting a caregiver is synonymous. It is truly a God given role. So Your Great. Yes I feel heavy these days too. I Love Your hair now, I didn't see it the other day. You are a loving Beautiful lady. Oh yes I have been a caregiver for my Grandma it was truly my pleasure and challenging. So take care of you and your family, know your feelings are valid. Rock On with your bad self.
Yes! Thank you my dear!!
@ITSCAROLYNGRAY PS I am a NYer 2. I will love to meet have a nosh maybe even help you with your things. I will put my picture back up trying to avoid some. Peace n hair grease girl
I understand where you are coming from. I have been experiencing some of the same scenarios you are describing. I continue to pray and at times it gets hard but I have to remember that it could be worse and it is worse for some. I have been a care giver for 15+ years and it's not easy. I have family members whom I am not understanding their political stance, but again I have to continue to pray. Just take a moment to feel but don't stay there. We know this too shall pass!
I am stressed about the world we live in. I just 🙏🏿 for the best. I will be voting
Girl, your eloquence around this conversation is top tier. I feel like we're living the same life. Navigating family dynamics and illness is the worst. But give yourself grace. You are at least trying.
Thank you for sharing, stay away from negative news, negative energy negative people, book a spa day for yourself and Carlos… no we don’t have to be strong cry if and when you need to, but plenty of self love and self care 🧖🏽♀️ ❤
Thanks for your vulnerability. I hope you find pockets of time to pour into your cup. I pray God gives you and Carlos what you need during this time. As far as content, I love your vintage shopping videos 😮and your styling videos like the 3-3-3 method. Love you, Cookie! ❤
We love your content I agree with Dr. K take some time for yourself if you need to talk more or less just do that but know we love you. You can just be authentic that's why we show up. This is a very polarizing and volatile election season. It does make you nervous not scared the best you can do is simply vote...participate. 💕
Yes, sis, this election has me so scared, so i completely feel you in that area. I will be voting tomorrow, and I can't wait to just get it over with. And on the other subject, please put yourself first, and then everything else has to fall in behind you. If you're broken, mentally, and physically, then you're no good to anyone around you. You first, sis, remember that !!!
FEELING THIS. You are not alone 🙃 these streets are hard to navigate. The fact that you are still HERE showing up, articulating your opinion publicly, and sharing it honestly is a TRUIMPH. Thank you for that 👏🏾👏🏾🙌🏾
Im very new to your channel and one of the things I love about your content is your personality, you're so warm and personable- and fashion fwd 😉l enjoy the way you express yourself, it's genuine and comical all at the same time. Im saddened to hear you're struggling behind the scenes. You are definitely absolutely not alone. What's helped me as of late is finding ways to simplify when I can- and letting things that are out of my control go. Full stop 🛑
Lean into the things you can do well, where you can be helpful & impactful - and let the rest go! It's ok to put your wellbeing 1st- therapy helps with not feeling guilty about doing that. Helps untangle some of the wires of our mind and heart.
This election cycle is soo strange- like this can't be life?! Ive resolved myself to disconnect from it, I had to for my sanity. I can't live in worry & fear- and that is what political issues induce. (Ima still go vote- ladies 1st! ) We are all just hanging on and moving thru- I pray you find a healthy balance within your relationship and all the things you've got going on. Deep breath! We gone be alright gurl ❤Peace and blessings to you Sis ❤
Thank you for sharing! Sis you got this it’s so difficult for men to share and open up and especially with a scary situation like this when they are afraid they can come across as mean I’ve experienced this I say let him come to you hope I’m not over stepping
Cookie! Praying for you and the family. Yes I think we are going through so much right now. I know I am. I’m at the big age where I’m also helping being a caregiver for my elder dad, I’m also a mother and grandmother trying to help my daughter who’s also going through a trying time. On top of that going through menopause 🤯 all while trying to maintain a full time job😢. But I’m trusting God will see us through 🙏🏾 oh try vitamin D if you don’t already great for heart palpitations and anxiety and get your iron levels checked. Love you Carolyn 💕