How to Deal With Any Life Problem
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- Опубликовано: 16 мар 2022
- Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
This is the first video lesson from my Resilience Course, a course designed to help you take on tougher challenges, fight through roadblocks, and live life with tenacity and purpose.
Download the workbook to go with this lesson here: mrk.mn/3If3Eiy
Truth: It doesn’t matter how smart or talented you are if you can’t handle all the shit life throws at you (and life will always throw shit at you). You'll find that resilient people turn towards the shit to deal with it, while fragile people run away from it and end up suffering with a whole lot more shit that follows.
The Resilience Course shows you how to break through the barriers that hold you back so you can live a more meaningful, fulfilled life. And you can learn how to create this unshakable resilience by signing up to my premium membership here: bit.ly/3LwHWfi
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I am Mark Manson, 3x #1 NY Times bestselling author of:
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Thanks for watching.
"Life is about the management of problems. And whoever manages their problems the best, has the best life" ~ Sylvester Stallone
"F*ck you table" ~ Mark Manson
Love this quote. true and sensible.
Easy to say when you have $100 billion dollars$
@@94champs Facts.. but I want to be good at managing my problems without money. I'm sick of making excuses... But I just keep on keeping on making them.. and not fixing them. And the worst part.. the worst part is that I know and still don't change my ways.. no self control.. I keep thinking if I could meet the right person to teach me.. idk..
So hard to do
"i dont want peace, i want problems always" is a way deeper quote than i initially thought
I recently was thinking exactly this! It was meant to be a joke originally but it has such great deepest meaning underneath...
The idea that life is about having better problems is truly great !
Yup bro💙
absolutely!
It is a good way to put it:)
Truly great but not necessarily true
@@bisket81 I agree
This is why I love Mark. He is honest when he does not know something. Practical and doesnt act like a guru
Do you know what "unconditional love" is..? Personal love... isn't real love... peace out dude..!😇😇
Gurus are a waste of time, no one really has the answer's to life, if anyone has it's all bs. “My major hobby is teasing people who take themselves and the quality of their knowledge too seriously.”
- Nassim Nicholas Taleb
Depends on which guru you are following...there are a lot of false gurus out there...
@@buddhaneosiddhananda8499ALL guru's are false. Wake up
@@themacocko6311 "Truth in the minority of one... is still truth..." Mahatma Gandi
Problems never stop; they merely get exchanged and/or upgraded. Happiness comes from solving problems. The keyword here is “solving.” If you’re avoiding your problems or feel like you don’t have any problems, then you’re going to make yourself miserable.
‐Mark Manson
I think it the same to The Courage to be Happy
He said it best!
And here I thought my life was abnormal because I had problems coming at me every month... I literally thought I was the only human being constantly dealing with problems in life 😭
Dayum this hit home all I ever did was dodge my problems man
I know life will always be filled by problems, but everyone needs that at least one source of happiness in their lives that fills them with strength and emotional capacity to deal with all other problems in life. When there is no source of happiness or gratitude, that’s when life starts feeling dreadful and pushes you into depression 😢
True but it's best when this source is internal, i.e. something that you do and control. One mistake I made was delegating my happiness management to outside sources. They have a tendency of eventually not being there for you when you need them most. Whereas developing a healthy relationship with yourself by learning what brings meaning and joy (not immediate pleasure) to you is a long-term investment that will carry you through the darkest times. Stay hard!
You hit the nail on the head. After numerous traumatic experiences in my career and having to appear stoic no matter what, I finally broke and have had PTSD for 18 years.
Dude, it's easy. Just get over it.
Bury it with scotch
I for one, hope you are doing better now.
Pain:Inevitable
Suffering:Optional
So - life is a paradox. Whatever you need, also destroys you ☯️ Choose your pain
Hence the old saying "Get a Life", since a well lived life with exposure to the world gives you those very Goldilocks stressors that Mark is talking about.
Also reference Nassim Taleb`s writings.
this guy gives some hope in my life.
Then you obviously haven't been paying attention
The psychological pain is far more than physical pain especially losing loved ones, grief over dead pets and family and restarting over from the wreckage of a natural disaster. I can imagine how it would feel going through all three at the same time.
How to deal with it
My favorite procrastinator has finally uploaded 💙
Haaaaa.... love it lolol 👌👌👌
i like how you tell better to see professionals. that's a responsible thing to say.
8:55 that is so so true. People are entitling things and then their brain tend to believe that
This is really good. Sustaining sobriety has become a challenge. I’ve learned a lot about resilience from this situation.
You can do it !
I really need this at this point of my life.
I really am happy that I found this. Life can really suck sometimes.
Mark Manson: Long-established principles of CBT for people that don't want to read CBT textbooks.
Nailed it
Yeah there should be more people out there spreading those great ideas to help people alleviate and prevent suffering ❤
I can so relate to this. If someone has even close to my mothers narcissistic, passive aggressive personality I tend to lose my shit! I can’t deal with it at all! It pushes a button and sets off these deep seeded emotions I harbor.
Dw me too, anyone that is overly bossy, critical, or impulsive really pinches a nerve for me
Me too!
No comment on the button pushing thing, but the common phrase is "deep seated emotions".
Hey Mark I hope you and your folks are doing fine. Thanks for the helpful content as always man. Kiitos
Speaks the truth. I wish more people could understand.
Hi Mark, I’ve read your blog everytime I hit a hard point in my life. 5 years ago it was healing from a breakup, and today, it’s my attempt of dealing with my baby who underwent open heart surgery.
As life keeps throwing new problems, I’m glad this video exists so I can use it to re-learn how to navigate different hardships that come my way.
It’s the constant running of the brain that causes us to suffer more….LOVE IT AND SO TRUE
The idea of giving right narrative is awesome because our mind beliefs it. Many times we feel more pain than we had,just because we were awful at narrating it.
Yes!!! Finally, another terrific video existed. Thanks, Mark!
Having read the book, this is the first time I subscribed to a channel without the video even starting.
This video is so much more important than anyone understand... Do yourself a favor and watch this video 3 times before you do anything else...
This is just what I needed to hear today. Thank you Mark!
"Life is a process of dealing with problems" that's pretty good way of looking at it
Mark, thank you for making amazing relatable wisdom, really needed to hear this, lots of clarity ❤
Mark sir , you are reallyy a inspiration for me. That type1 and type2 pain was so relatable.
Thanks alot sir😇🙏
Hey Mark , i hope you see this.
I'm being honest, i love your videos. But, please keep them coming each week. They helped me learn a lot about life. And cheers to your wisdom man. Your videos are really entertaining. And you know the exact way to convey message to people. You're doing great man. Love from india. ❤️
This video helped me so much and I just watched it. When I think of it that way, I can see the etra pain that I have been causing myself.
I'm so glad I found this channel. Your videos are amazing. Thank you
Amazing Mark. Practical ways to deal with problems explained so nicely. Thank you.
Thanks Mark. I needed this video this morning, more than I knew. Appreciate you and all that you do 🙏 🔥
Wow your examples really hit close to heart..
My mom died of cancer , I was born into a severely dysfunctional family and I also had a gf who cheated/left me and I took years to recover and not even sure if I'm fully recovered.
I doubt any of us ever recover completely. The pain is always there albeit dulled and surrounded with a healthy narrative (i.e., yes this was a shit show and hurt me in ways I never knew before but I chose to live life and not be controlled by these undoubtedly powerful emotions). I imagine this as an onion of selves and previous experiences. The past is never erased, it's covered with new layers.
And then just a few months back i got long covid and about to lose my new job wow..
Thank you, Mark.
It’s been the worst year of my life, but I need to get up, gotta get back UP. Excited for this one Mark, so let’s get to the video 🕊️
you are helping so people, that's nice of you, thanks so much Mark, 💟
Mark, your books helped me deeply when I was in a motorcycle accident I broke 2 bones and I didn’t walk for a year and was bed ridden with a broken back for 4 months! Your books helped greatly!
Great video Mark!
The idea of just the right amount of stress to help us grow has been described to me before as “eustress” and “distress”. Eustress is working out in a way that would stimulate muscle growth. Distress is working out so hard that your body isn’t able to properly recover. Both are stress, but not all stress is distress.
I also find it really interesting what you said about our brains believing an experience is traumatic if we decide to view it that way. I think that could warrant an entire video on its own. Breaking down those studies in a bit more depth, tips to evaluating whether something is traumatic, balancing that with personal history of similar trauma, etc.
Nice info!
If you look for the lesson and the blessing then events don`t seem traumatic anymore.
Hi Mark I love your books, articles and videos and i follow you for years. Love from Turkey :)
I just found you randomly today (all hail the almighty algorithm). Though I am not superstitious or religious I am having a hard time not ascribing some kind of providence to this random discovery. You know the old social media trope of posting something life affirming and captioning with "Don't know who needs to see this today..."? This is that. I needed to see your channel today. I needed to hear your affirmations and yes even your criticism and detractions. If you ever wonder if you are really being heard or if you are helping people let me emphatically assure you that you absolutely are. My deepest thanks.
Mark you're awesome thanks for these!
this is the best thing ever thanks so much mark
All class and no nonsense as usual mark
Wow, I needed to hear this so badly
love the upgrade your problems concept.
Nearly finished your book about hope, 'Everything is fcckd'. Really insightful. Changed my outlook, and it's a great read too!
How come I only just found you today? I need to check out all your stuff. Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us
thank you Mark.
This is a pretty sick video, good job Mark
Your content is helpful. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing vulnerable stuff
Love your books
You know my biggest struggle is not recognizing these struggles, but doing something to overcome these struggles. For example i’ve known this thing im doing is really bad for me, however I keep going back I still yearn for it and it pains me everyday even though I know and understand that Im so much better without it. I believe I can’t get over or distract myself from it because it’s so new and so fun, compared to my hardworking life which is repetitive and boring, while its not like im living a bad life or the hard work is something I dont want to do it, its just the vice I speak of is so much funner and makes me feel so happy
Missed you on RUclips. Wish you post regularly. Really appreciate your videos 😊
Legend is back🔥
GOD BLESS YOUR FAMILY MARK
Clicked like before the video started because your content is so good.
Happened to click into this video and you said what was on my mind! My dad passed away from cancer, I asked myself the same questions
this video gives a life-changing perspective!!!!!
Welcome back mark! We miss you!
thank you so much.
The deeper you go, the more that you'll see that the most meaning comes from the BS or problems as you say. It's being able to accept that that is why you are actually here. If you get more serious problems, then it's easier to see this.
Not sure if you know this, Mark - you are better than most therapists! I saw you first on a Qatar airlines flight screen! :) Since then, you are my guru. Thank you for doing what you do. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Tfs! Also the disclaimer, the world needs you!
Mr. Manson you literally changed my life...as a narcissistic millennial I struggled mentally for the longest time which hindered me from living my full potential. If you're ever in the LA or OC area please let me know. I would like to buy you dinner :)
Struggle is to the resilient soul what canvas is to the artist, an opportunity to showcase its beauty.
Go on and endure, and you will survive like a stubborn candle. Go on and endure with love, and you will be radiant like the sun.
Soo right everybody has some kind of problems in life, unavoidable
ONE OF YOUR BEST VIDEOS MY MAN
Ok I really needed to hear all this today.
Hey Mark your hair looks amazing 💁🏻
This man should have 1 billion subs
Thank you very much.
I worked as a Safety Officer at a State Hospital for years - I think your assessment is off on this one Mark. Healthy minded people grow in life and the most successful, find lower stress by minimizing "type 2 pain" as a result of understanding situations and choices. I'm 61 years old now and don't believe that "a certain amount of pain" is good for most people. The healthiest lives have learned how to minimize pain in their lives, and in turn, handle tragedies with a mindset that results in minimum pain.
Resilience - My Fav ✨❤️✨
Came here from Yes Theory! So glad I found this! So helpful! Thank you!
Mark is GOATED
Thinking of subscribing on your site...i listened to you a few times lately...you are good...thank you!
Thank you for your book!
Thing is type 2 is super personal & no amount of words would bring us all on same page. Spectrum ranges from intense deep work to no work at all.
Thank you
I do appreciate the acknowledgement that emotional trauma is just like a car accident in a sense, crazy how our minds jump to conclusions, overthink, and beat ourselves up, a lot of it is in our heads but it feels real enough to us 😢 uhh Goddamn
Right-I wanna upgrade my life problems!
Great lecture 🙏
Thank you. Nice one
I would also add the quality of our lives also hinges on our ability to avoid creating unnecessary problems to deal with .
You should have a 100 million subscribers. 👌
Huge fan of your approach and the way you synthesize life’s lessons! Re-reading SAONGAF this weekend.
Thank u so much
Love the topic.really need it.
Wonderful video❤
Saving lives 💕💕
thank u MARK
The GOAT🔥
very good video !
l love you mark great advice