Memes For Guys - MEME MONDAYS || Vaazkl React

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  • Опубликовано: 11 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 1,1 тыс.

  • @cutter892
    @cutter892 2 месяца назад +2407

    Male friend groups generally don't have a "leader" because it could be considered a gang, lol. Actually we don't have a leader we just have "that guy". "That guy" just tends to be the one to come up with the fun or interesting idea first but will gladly step aside if someone else has an idea.

    • @neggy2926
      @neggy2926 2 месяца назад +357

      But generally "That guy" only came up with stupid idea which wpuld get us into trouble but it sounds fun we did it anyway

    • @terminator9195
      @terminator9195 2 месяца назад +221

      "that guy" is usually the one who speaks for the group as well. the one that orders drinks/food etc, but like you said is not the leader and would gladly step away to let someone else do the talking

    • @KitSurrel
      @KitSurrel 2 месяца назад +120

      "That guy" would usually ask everyone if they agree instead of just flat out deciding for everyone and sadly is also susceptible to suggestions and sometimes ends up being a puppet and a scapegoat when things go south. Guess that's why non of us want to be "the leader", just "a leader" when needed and till necessary. Anyone who thinks they're the leader of their group is just being humbled by everyone in the group.

    • @Evan-k
      @Evan-k 2 месяца назад +27

      @@terminator9195 you don't all order your own stuff? Wow you're not ok

    • @gsst6389
      @gsst6389 2 месяца назад +17

      The leader is the one who has tge most natural influence with in the group, the one who is close or hangs out with the most of the members with in that group, hes the one that if there where to be a civil war, he woulnt be able to pick sides but ultimately come with a final judgment, if not the group splits apart. That the leader period.

  • @brtt150
    @brtt150 2 месяца назад +902

    I think a lot of women believe male friend groups have a leader because there is often one that is more popular wirh women. I promise you the guys in the group dont see leader. At best we have "idea guy".

    • @TheMarch-jn3rz
      @TheMarch-jn3rz 2 месяца назад +64

      That’s because they like that one guy and that guy is friends with other guys in their eyes.

    • @TENthe10th
      @TENthe10th 2 месяца назад +21

      Or the group mother.

    • @ClokworkGremlin
      @ClokworkGremlin 2 месяца назад +103

      Guys' friend groups are a meritocracy. We follow the guy who looks like he knows what he's doing, and that tends to change depending on the activity.
      It's also important to give everyone a chance at being the leader, because if you don't, then the guy who never gets his turn at the wheel eventually starts to feel frozen out and he'll leave the group. This isn't always the group's fault, sometimes the guy getting frozen out just has zero presence.

    • @alive_twicedead_once34
      @alive_twicedead_once34 2 месяца назад

      Fun fact: How do you tell if a woman is overweight with only being able to hear her voice? If she sounds like she has a clothes pin on her nose.

    • @jayzenstyle
      @jayzenstyle 2 месяца назад +27

      It's more of a meritocracy, like the other guy said. The "leader" role depends on the task at hand, and is usually the guy most fitting of the job and we follow suit.

  • @rhyleymaster
    @rhyleymaster 2 месяца назад +992

    Alana will never know the satisfaction of having to piss power wash the stains off the porcelain throne

    • @haku7335
      @haku7335 2 месяца назад +64

      This is what makes life even worth living

    • @DrakeOola
      @DrakeOola 2 месяца назад +45

      Helps when you're rocking a semi too

    • @rhyleymaster
      @rhyleymaster 2 месяца назад +45

      @@DrakeOola double the force for half the pressure. Then when the half chub subsides you go full blast and hit everything but the bowl

    • @Spectral-Senpai
      @Spectral-Senpai 2 месяца назад +17

      When you can't pay money for powerwashing simulator this is the next best thing

    • @gary_something_else6417
      @gary_something_else6417 2 месяца назад +4

      that one about killed me

  • @brucemaximus3797
    @brucemaximus3797 2 месяца назад +480

    To clarify, we don't have leaders in our groups. We kinda operate like a cadre of mercenaries. We have Archetypes.
    We have "That Guy," the Suavamente, the absolute Slick Rick. The man pulls more women than anyone knew existed in your local area. This ability is NOT transferrable.
    "The Dude" is the crazy one. Up for literally anything at the drop of a hat. Has photos and eyewitness testimony to his parachuting adventures and his fight with a wolverine.
    There's also "This Guy," a rock of stability. You need help, he's there. It does not matter when, or where, or what. Caveat: there IS a limit to how much money he will lend.
    "My/Our Man" is the dude who will gladly host parties, and has the most awesome place to do so. Sound system, pool, jacuzzi, grill, this man has the entertainment.
    "Our Buddy" is the quiet friend who leaves the parties early, but always shows up when asked. Quiet, helpful, and absolutely terrifying when actually thought deeply about. This madlad knows Something about Everything. This man knows advanced Organic Chemistry and Physics like they were a reflex. He can tell you how to remove a stain from carpet or make TNT, and everything in between. A living computer search engine. Beware: if you ask a question, he WILL answer it with NO regard for whether you are ready to know it.

    • @chinchin3274
      @chinchin3274 2 месяца назад +78

      The most beautiful description of guy friend groups. "The gang"

    • @tremor230
      @tremor230 2 месяца назад +41

      I can confirm.
      My rank is "Our Buddy" in our group.

    • @gonzalodiaz3152
      @gonzalodiaz3152 2 месяца назад +16

      guess I'm "This Guy" in my friend group

    • @Bigdude0444
      @Bigdude0444 2 месяца назад +5

      ​@@gonzalodiaz3152 Same except for friends and my family. It kind of sucks sometimes but it is what it is.

    • @theenderdestruction2362
      @theenderdestruction2362 2 месяца назад +34

      And then theres the rare "elder friend" he's the guy whos older then you and you may see him as a elder brother, he's ready to play or pull you out of stupid shit, maybe quiet but he's the wisest and dumbess one at all times

  • @SebasTian58323
    @SebasTian58323 2 месяца назад +610

    Men friend groups don't have an actual leader. There's the guy who comes up with the first idea, but he'll gladly do the ideas other people come up with as well. He's just that guy. If another person starts coming up with the fun ideas, he becomes the next guy.

    • @Lark88
      @Lark88 2 месяца назад +14

      I'm thinking some guys are born leaders, so naturally, any friend group they are in will have him as the leader.

    • @berserkerpotato1521
      @berserkerpotato1521 2 месяца назад +6

      I’m the sugar daddy of the guy who plans since apparently my grind set automatically sets me up as the bank of MONEY

    • @nivyan
      @nivyan 2 месяца назад +13

      In my experience, the guy who made a suggestion and/or is familiar with what we're currently doing or the area we're currently in becomes the leader. Say we're going to a bar outside our normal area, the leader role shifts like this:
      1) The guy who knows how to plan
      2) The guy with the car and decides the route and music
      3) The guy who knows where the bar is
      4a) The social extrovert who can make us join a table of only women
      or
      4b) The guy who knows how to party
      5) The most sober, yet still drunk guy
      6) The "dad" who makes sure everyone goes home safely.
      These can be the same guy in different roles during the evening.

    • @alive_twicedead_once34
      @alive_twicedead_once34 2 месяца назад

      Fun fact: How do you tell if a woman is overweight with only being able to hear her voice? If she sounds like she has a clothes pin on her nose.

    • @inuush
      @inuush 2 месяца назад +3

      My friends and I are all introverts, we got no leader, maybe that means something.

  • @Minnesota_Fatts
    @Minnesota_Fatts 2 месяца назад +808

    “Why aren’t you the leader of your friend group?”
    I know how to shut up.

    • @freedantheeternal
      @freedantheeternal 2 месяца назад +107

      A valuable skill sadly lost to many these days.

    • @bombomos
      @bombomos 2 месяца назад +15

      I'm not the funniest I'm the group lol

    • @alive_twicedead_once34
      @alive_twicedead_once34 2 месяца назад

      Fun fact: How do you tell if a woman is overweight with only being able to hear her voice? If she sounds like she has a clothes pin on her nose.

    • @crowkoraki6910
      @crowkoraki6910 2 месяца назад +7

      Or "no no no he got a point" 👉👉👉 follows the idea

    • @darkin1484
      @darkin1484 Месяц назад +4

      Couldn't have said it better.

  • @MunckFu
    @MunckFu 2 месяца назад +177

    "You are offered $300mil, but you can never drink booze again"
    Me who has been off the sauce for over 20 years now: Easy money, yo!

    • @TonyTama
      @TonyTama 2 месяца назад +5

      Congrats my dude

    • @combativeThinker
      @combativeThinker 2 месяца назад +14

      I never even started.

    • @theterrorofdimensions1326
      @theterrorofdimensions1326 2 месяца назад +2

      Ha! Joke's on you! I never even started! 😂

    • @Wolfbroa
      @Wolfbroa 2 месяца назад +1

      Only had one full can and some sips in my whole life

    • @Ironknuckle100
      @Ironknuckle100 2 месяца назад +1

      Sold! I make wine in my basement. That’s not booze that’s grape juice.

  • @chasepeeler9188
    @chasepeeler9188 2 месяца назад +55

    Male friend groups are a council. Here’s how their roles work:
    1. The Guy that makes a suggestion
    2. The One that immediately agrees
    3. The One that’s iffy about suggestion
    4. The Devil’s Advocate asks what they plan to do if the suggestion falls through
    5-on. The Rest fall into 1-3 or says ‘Nah. I’m good.’

    • @wyatttyson7737
      @wyatttyson7737 21 день назад

      In my experience its:
      1.) The Guy that makes the suggestion (usually me)
      2.) The Guy who suggests something stupid instead
      3.) The Guy(s) that agree with #2 and take the blunt of the real life damage/monetary hit/in game damage/ect
      4.) The Guy that admits #1 was right the whole time and that #2 is stupid
      (Position open for Guy #4. Yeah, I need a new social circle)

  • @Unclaimed_Username
    @Unclaimed_Username 2 месяца назад +314

    14:35
    Basically guys' nuts are reactive to temperature. They sag when it's hotter or contract when it's colder to maintain a certain heat so that the boys inside don't die off because they're sensitive. If you're feeling cold (meaning they should be contracted), but they are hanging normal (meaning it's not actually cold), it's likely because you're sick and the cold feeling isn't because of the room.
    Basically guys can tell if they're getting sick by how low the jewels are hanging vs how they feel.

    • @Shark_Dude
      @Shark_Dude 2 месяца назад +29

      I think it's because the room is cold, but because you're sick, they hang low because your internal body temp is higher than normal. I could be wrong though.

    • @Unclaimed_Username
      @Unclaimed_Username 2 месяца назад +38

      @@Shark_Dude no that's exactly it, I just didn't explain it well.

    • @thewinterprince1731
      @thewinterprince1731 2 месяца назад +7

      As a man, I never knew this. Never even thought about it. Wild.

    • @zerrodefex
      @zerrodefex 2 месяца назад +6

      This is also why we've invented boxer briefs with a separate pouch for them, if your underwear is too lose you can end up with uncomfortably situations in hot humid weather where the sack or sausage ends up sticking to your own leg inside your pants.

    • @alive_twicedead_once34
      @alive_twicedead_once34 2 месяца назад

      Fun fact: How do you tell if a woman is overweight with only being able to hear her voice? If she sounds like she has a clothes pin on her nose.

  • @tonywilliams6294
    @tonywilliams6294 2 месяца назад +42

    9:39 it was worse than that, honestly.
    She slept with the guy, left her husband and kids, and thought the guy wanted to be with her.
    He ghosted her.
    Then, she started whining about wanting to be with her family again.
    Surprise, surprise, they didn't want her back.

  • @wraithdemonsoul7926
    @wraithdemonsoul7926 2 месяца назад +406

    Wrong, in my experience most guy friend groups have no leader. Sure one person might step up and take charge for a day, but it's never the same dude every time. Real friends don't set a hierarchy.

    • @ThelastofNazarick
      @ThelastofNazarick 2 месяца назад +27

      Depends on the expertise. In the cave guy. We go to caves I take the lead. We do fps? It's somebody else. We go to bar? Another buddy. It's all about who is most competent.

    • @xenxander
      @xenxander 2 месяца назад +16

      all guy groups have a hierarchy but it depends on the location and/or topic of discussion, as it changes based on expertise.

    • @davidtogi5878
      @davidtogi5878 2 месяца назад +18

      @@xenxander friends may have hierarchy but its subtle and not claimed. If it does then one need to consider changing the word "friend" into "acquaintance".

    • @alive_twicedead_once34
      @alive_twicedead_once34 2 месяца назад

      Fun fact: How do you tell if a woman is overweight with only being able to hear her voice? If she sounds like she has a clothes pin on her nose.

    • @laminedehoorne1438
      @laminedehoorne1438 2 месяца назад +2

      More like a counsul where ideas are shared and we choose the best of them.

  • @senatorarmstrong4936
    @senatorarmstrong4936 2 месяца назад +148

    Step 1: Date Alana
    Step 2: ???
    Step 3: Eat 600 dumplings

    • @austinstoeffler8814
      @austinstoeffler8814 2 месяца назад +29

      Gonna be real, homie; I'm just skipping to step three.

    • @senatorarmstrong4936
      @senatorarmstrong4936 2 месяца назад +17

      @@austinstoeffler8814 I would too if I had a dumpling babushka, but I do not.

    • @austinstoeffler8814
      @austinstoeffler8814 2 месяца назад +16

      @@senatorarmstrong4936 make them. BYOB: Be Your Own Babushka.

    • @senatorarmstrong4936
      @senatorarmstrong4936 2 месяца назад +10

      @@austinstoeffler8814 It's just not the same. Babushkas are magical.

    • @speedfire1184
      @speedfire1184 2 месяца назад +7

      Step 2: go to Russia

  • @blueteamepsilon7798
    @blueteamepsilon7798 2 месяца назад +60

    Picking up multiple chairs isnt about impressing girls. Its about getting the job done faster so you can go home without being accused of not helping. (Brought to you by an introvert)

    • @xipheonj
      @xipheonj 2 месяца назад +5

      For me it was both plus more reasons. It's fun to test myself to see how many chairs I can carry at one time, and to compete with the other guys. We all worked together to get it done as fast as possible, but we also hoped the girls were looking and were impressed by carrying an entire stack of chairs, or lifting multiple chairs really high to put on the top of a stack.

  • @Evan-k
    @Evan-k 2 месяца назад +548

    Nah, most friend groups dont have a leader
    Edit: apparently I'm always "that guy" in the group

    • @NonConformistPsyche
      @NonConformistPsyche 2 месяца назад +96

      Yep, no leader. But "that guy". As to what makes him "that guy", no idea.

    • @autobotCRSHR
      @autobotCRSHR 2 месяца назад +45

      ​@@NonConformistPsycheStarscream your way to leadership

    • @haku7335
      @haku7335 2 месяца назад +38

      ​@@NonConformistPsychewell hes just that guy. He has the ideas everyone finds good but cant think of.
      That makes him that guy

    • @rafresendenrafresenden.1644
      @rafresendenrafresenden.1644 2 месяца назад +9

      But what about "that guy"?

    • @aoihitori
      @aoihitori 2 месяца назад +5

      That guy.

  • @K-dis_Boher
    @K-dis_Boher 2 месяца назад +113

    20:23 that is wife material right there; sure she might be a bad chef, but
    1) the fact she even made snacks is a huge green flag about her caring nature; AND shows she's not the femcel type who is too prideful or narcissistic to "stoop" to the level of doing housewife things
    2) the fact that they're ideal snacking snacks shows an extra layer of care and intention; as opposed to something simple like water, and whatever simple snack stuff they had; that was CUSTOMIZED to his taste
    3)you already know she's the type to support him having hobbies instead of being the type to always nag about them
    100% worth marrying, just practice cooking, hint at her learning to cook, or just budget for eating out/takeout

    • @RisingAurora
      @RisingAurora 2 месяца назад +11

      @@K-dis_Boher
      Even better-show her how to make a couple things, then back off and let her experiment.

  • @Scp_096_
    @Scp_096_ 2 месяца назад +80

    2:11 we didn't have a leader, we were a union

    • @TENthe10th
      @TENthe10th 2 месяца назад +14

      No, we don't have a leader but a group mother. You know the (comparatively) responsible one that we need to talk us out of a bad situation.

  • @vonrich2614
    @vonrich2614 2 месяца назад +59

    There are groups that have leaders but most dont have one. In fact, sometimes the "talker" is just the social one but the one whos opinions everyone values the least.

    • @somedrunkthylacine7539
      @somedrunkthylacine7539 2 месяца назад +21

      The talker in our group is the funniest guy ever, but his advice or instructions are the least reliable ones.

  • @BeastGuyver
    @BeastGuyver 2 месяца назад +36

    9:40 yeah imagine you're the other guy. You meet a woman have a nice conversation and then the next time you see her she tells you she just left her husband of 14 years... she abandoned a 14 year commitment because of 1 conversation. Massive red flag because she will leave you just as easily. yeah Homie don't plat dat.

  • @mongooseunleashed
    @mongooseunleashed 2 месяца назад +54

    I literally just spent hours talking to a dude about philosophy, religion, politics, and history. The only thing we didn't ask was our names..

    • @zerrodefex
      @zerrodefex 2 месяца назад +15

      I was at a party where pretty much none of the guys ever asked or gave their names the entire time they were chatting for hours on various topics. The only commonality was we all knew the host.

    • @mshaman86
      @mshaman86 2 месяца назад

      No names.

    • @user-cf9dk2gv2y-AKA-adamnsteve
      @user-cf9dk2gv2y-AKA-adamnsteve Месяц назад +2

      We be talking about important topics

    • @Skelethin
      @Skelethin Месяц назад

      I would have forgotten the name even if asked.

    • @wyatttyson7737
      @wyatttyson7737 21 день назад

      I once bumped into a guy at my local hobby games store, and after talking to him for an hour I got him to put back the boxes he was planning on buying, buy two different boxes, and discussed strategy for the game. I never learned his name.

  • @JackThaStripper
    @JackThaStripper 2 месяца назад +94

    "He's usually the one that yaps the most" Yeah, that's why he's not the leader, we just let him intercept all incoming traffic to vet them. Via yapping.

    • @ShadowknightEX
      @ShadowknightEX 2 месяца назад +27

      Yeah. That’s just the group bard. The actual leader is probably the fairly quiet guy who can hold his end of conversation when required to. Oh and when he does speak everybody else tends to shut up

    • @mshaman86
      @mshaman86 2 месяца назад +8

      That's me. I'm the yapper, and I know my role. And if you think I'm the "leader" then you have just been successfully intercepted.

  • @notaprinny
    @notaprinny 2 месяца назад +89

    33:15 THIS SPEAKS TO MY SOUL! My mom literally pulled this on me and both of my brothers last year, telling us we are all terrible sons for not showing up and helping him build a greenhouse... that he A) wasn't ready to build and B) didn't want any help building. It was so bad that I just showed up one day (hour long drive), asked him as soon as I walked in if he wanted help with it (while my mom was in the room) and he said no.

    • @GodwynDi
      @GodwynDi 2 месяца назад

      Mom was also right though. Its not about the help, its about the offer.

    • @javi_fc
      @javi_fc 2 месяца назад +9

      @@GodwynDi that's bullshit. if i know you specifically want no help, why the fuck am i going to waste both of our times asking you if you want help? that's some ridiculous "i want to look like a good person" shit. if you want my help you can ask me. plain and simple. i hate this beat around the bush shit. just tell me if you want or need help.

    • @raifthemad
      @raifthemad 2 месяца назад

      Why are you calling your mom, him?

    • @notaprinny
      @notaprinny 2 месяца назад

      @@raifthemad Helping my dad, as it says in the meme. So "him" would be my dad. Could have been clearer in my comment I guess.

    • @javi_fc
      @javi_fc 2 месяца назад

      @@raifthemad talking about his father. read it again.

  • @SkyTowerKurogane
    @SkyTowerKurogane 2 месяца назад +27

    There is no leader in a male friend groups. If we're going out, going somewhere, there can be like a "party leader" like in an mmo. but that's not a permanent role.

  • @lordgenerias
    @lordgenerias 2 месяца назад +49

    No joke; taking a whizz when stiff isn't easy. It doesn't bend very much or it hurts, so you have to tilt your lower body around, back up a little, adjust the angle, it's a process lemme tell ya.

    • @CrizzyEyes
      @CrizzyEyes 2 месяца назад

      It will come out of my urethra at literally 90 degrees if I piss while hard. Not even a conceivable option for me. No I don't know why.

    • @walkir2662
      @walkir2662 2 месяца назад +11

      But the worst is if you have to shit, too.

    • @callak_9974
      @callak_9974 2 месяца назад +6

      Better waiting a couple of minutes then go. Don't want to strain the muscle there that has its purpose.

    • @mghegotagun
      @mghegotagun 2 месяца назад +3

      ​@@walkir2662fking impossible. Folded toilet paper on the tip. Mitigate the damage.

    • @goldenhate6649
      @goldenhate6649 2 месяца назад

      Nah nah, just put some pressure on bottom and restrict the flow. Works wonders.

  • @eXpriest
    @eXpriest 2 месяца назад +23

    The guy that yaps the most in the friend group isn't the leader, he's the Cartman.

  • @aidreinhorn1534
    @aidreinhorn1534 2 месяца назад +90

    Not gunna lie, Alana’s grandma sounds fucking awesome.

    • @leargamma4912
      @leargamma4912 2 месяца назад +5

      I wish my grandma was still alive

    • @Lexion86
      @Lexion86 2 месяца назад +12

      A while back, my Mom and I drove from Minnesota down to Texas to surprise visit my Grandma (on her side). We showed up at about 9 pm, so we pretty much just went straight to bed, but woke up the next morning to the biggest breakfast spread we had ever seen. Grandmas are pretty friggin' rad like that.

  • @waymoretheoutlaw5895
    @waymoretheoutlaw5895 2 месяца назад +59

    Bro, the only time any person is in charge is either the one driving or the one buying the beer

    • @Yomotomen
      @Yomotomen 18 дней назад

      When money is involved, and when lives are involved, the leader is very easily decided.

  • @TheTolnoc
    @TheTolnoc 2 месяца назад +29

    To be fair, peeing when you're hard requires you to lean over and put your head against the wall to get the right angle.

    • @patrick9876
      @patrick9876 2 месяца назад +1

      big facts

    • @Morrismini1
      @Morrismini1 Месяц назад

      You could also sit down like you’re taking a shit but backwards

  • @Gaspatim
    @Gaspatim 2 месяца назад +32

    1:03 SHE MISSED THE JOKE!
    2:43 SHE MISSED THE JOKE, *AGAIN*
    also no most friend groups don't have a leader i mean i've never really had a real friend group i suppose, but i just know it's not how it works, we all equal in the friend group, if we decide to conquer the world we'll do it together you know what i Mean?

    • @Lark88
      @Lark88 2 месяца назад +1

      38:00 also missed the joke.

  • @aaronburdon221
    @aaronburdon221 2 месяца назад +45

    Some of these women think they don't fart but sometimes they fart in their sleep, it sounds like a tuba full of doritos.

  • @thedomoking
    @thedomoking 2 месяца назад +14

    13:08 Eddie Hall, the man who deadlifted half a ton, was only able to do it because he mentally put himself in a scenario that he had to lift a car off of his kids, triggering the emergency fight or flight addrenaline.

  • @lordgenerias
    @lordgenerias 2 месяца назад +19

    Gotta be careful with the turbo piss. Too much power, and now you have to tell your doctor that you hurt yourself taking a leak, and that's why there was a tiny bit of blood in the sample. Only go to 130%! Much more, and you're gonna blow a pressure valve!

  • @colemcgrath7660
    @colemcgrath7660 2 месяца назад +24

    21:17, Definitely the blue and pink pills. Who'd be dumb enough to pass up being both a dragon rider **AND** a pirate at the same time?

  • @oddersisadog
    @oddersisadog 2 месяца назад +10

    Nuketown was a test sight map for nukes based on 1950s future design. It's not supposed to be the future as we see it, but the future as the 1950s saw it.

  • @Anteman
    @Anteman 2 месяца назад +14

    Pour one out for the homie who lost to cancer. May his gamer tag never fade and his achievements be lauded.

  • @thraellock
    @thraellock 2 месяца назад +16

    Yeah I remember my mom telling me to go out and help me dad chop wood or something so I would go through the process going upstairs, find my socks, get my shoes on, run back down, go outside, Find where my dad actually is, ask him if he needs help, have him tell me no he's fine then I run back in to have her yell on why i'm inside and not believe me when I say Dad said he didn't need help.

  • @kingmric
    @kingmric 2 месяца назад +13

    I'm becoming the reverse gojo when it comes to life; nah, I'd lose.

  • @ShadowDemon_4
    @ShadowDemon_4 2 месяца назад +58

    "My cancer won guys. Goodbye." 😢

    • @Warthunder123-h2n
      @Warthunder123-h2n Месяц назад

      Your legit watching a V tuber instead of spending time with your family and stop like begging

  • @RichyArg
    @RichyArg 2 месяца назад +8

    the meatball guy sounds like my grandpa, he had gout, and my gran always monitored his uric acid in blood closely because the gout outbreaks were so painful he could not walk, and one of the easiest ways to curb your uric acid in blood is to limit your intake of meat, but especially stuff like liver, which was one of my grandpa's favourite meals, i lost track of how many times i'd come visit and my grandpa would be stuck in the couch with hot compresses on his whole leg down from the knee, and my gran telling him "told you" in an annoyed tone, and my grandpa being "worth it" while watching tv.

  • @Gray-soul_81
    @Gray-soul_81 2 месяца назад +7

    In my friend group, we never had a leader. When men gather and they're not friends, that's when a hierarchy manifests.

  • @Pers0n97
    @Pers0n97 2 месяца назад +47

    "On one hand I like sausages"
    - Alana, 2024

  • @mashiro2109
    @mashiro2109 2 месяца назад +18

    man i hate mondays so much, but these meme mondays have been making it a bit better

  • @TheJman669
    @TheJman669 2 месяца назад +14

    23:17 "Are you this old?" Step your game up son, anyone remember MXC on spiketv? Get it on!

    • @sthcproductions
      @sthcproductions 2 месяца назад +5

      Literally the best shit on tv at the time

    • @mghegotagun
      @mghegotagun 2 месяца назад

      Show of hands... now!

  • @NigraeLegiones
    @NigraeLegiones 2 месяца назад +9

    Dunno if anyone explained it but the "peeing while hard" issue is biology. After a point urine and sperm have its own tube. Where they combine is basically a valve that shuts off urine when hard in order to make sure the sperm goes where it is supposed to and to make sure urine doesnt go where it isnt supposed to.

  • @grindcorgz
    @grindcorgz 2 месяца назад +4

    "If I don't lift this I'm gay and my family dies" 😂😂 way too real

  • @SirTayluh
    @SirTayluh 2 месяца назад +3

    Unironically the best motivation for exercise is scenarios like "if I fail, everyone dies". It has worked for millennia, except today we can put on headphones and play those scenarios in our heads with the *perfect* soundtrack.

  • @pancakiy7531
    @pancakiy7531 2 месяца назад +14

    There was a girl I worked with who's name I didn't know and instead of asking I offered a high five. That was our thing for about a year until I figured out her name. We'd get excited for our daily high five then go about our day

  • @TheSilversepiroth
    @TheSilversepiroth 2 месяца назад +12

    What do you *_MEAN_* BBQ chips is a red flag!? BBQ chips are amazing

    • @Lark88
      @Lark88 2 месяца назад +3

      Sour Cream and Onion is where it's at.

  • @Rikkity
    @Rikkity 2 месяца назад +7

    Correction on the career thing: When men have a career they are willing to put hours into so that his family can live comfortably they are providers. If a man sacrifices time from his career to be with his family he's called a loser or lazy. This is how we are viewed in the dating market.
    As Chris Rock put it: "Only Women, Children and Dogs are loved unconditionally. Men are ONLY loved under the condition they can PROVIDE something." Unfortunately this still rings true today.

  • @Yuushinfx
    @Yuushinfx 2 месяца назад +13

    Shows wipe out
    "are you this old"
    Firefox goes "oooo we took bet in school about it"
    Me being graduated from highschool for 4 years when the show first aired 😢

  • @thegrandlord2914
    @thegrandlord2914 2 месяца назад +6

    This realy happened like 2 weeks ago.
    A group of men from USA throwing a drinking party in a villa in Bali, Indonesia. They drinking and partying until they drunk and passed out
    When they wake up in the morning, they find two local men unknowingly join them. One of them even sleep on the bed. When asked how they ended up there, they said they don't know. The last memory they have, they are in a bar hanging out.
    Not only the two local men unknowingly join them, there's also a bat hanging under the chandelier and a monkey busy looking for an exist door.
    It turns out when these men are drunk, they catch that bat and the monkey and having fun with them
    So, in one night, these drunk tourists kidnaping two local men, one bat and one monkey.

  • @criseist9786
    @criseist9786 2 месяца назад +7

    Alena doesn't know we don't do leaders lmao

  • @jameskazd9951
    @jameskazd9951 2 месяца назад +6

    on "peeing while hard thing" there is a valve that closes off your bladder so your little swimmers don't have to swim through urine

    • @zerrodefex
      @zerrodefex 2 месяца назад

      Because urine would kill them, there's actually a gland that first secretes fluid before they're released that clears the path for them.

  • @Bryan-and-friends
    @Bryan-and-friends 2 месяца назад +4

    The chat member who said "Y'all have wives?" Got me LAUGHING 💀

  • @Blindluck92
    @Blindluck92 2 месяца назад +2

    We have no leader. We follow whoever most seems to know what they're doing. Gets really funny when that person goes, "I thought I was following you!"
    Also, Ferb was a walking "I'm him" moment, but silently pulling Vanessa was the clincher.

  • @DraftyCoast
    @DraftyCoast 2 месяца назад +16

    Alana poems just got the majority streight to the friendzone

    • @RavenCloak13
      @RavenCloak13 2 месяца назад +6

      Also were usually poems about sex with just flowery wording.

  • @brunogamesbr1
    @brunogamesbr1 2 месяца назад +27

    it's not that you phisically can't pee while you're hard, but the thing is, you can't aim down, and it's always in turbo mode, so you either have to wait, try to force and bend it to point it into the toilet (that hurts a lot and never works), or do some heavy contorcionism, my favourite is just hugging the toilet and sticking it a little bit inside the bowl

    • @Lexion86
      @Lexion86 2 месяца назад +1

      Before any good-intentioned ladyfolk suggest sitting to pee...we don't like cold toilet porcelain on the tip of our dong. Especially the inner bowl.

    • @CrizzyEyes
      @CrizzyEyes 2 месяца назад

      Or... you could just sit down. I don't normally sit down either, but there's literally no one around, I don't know why men are so afraid of this.

    • @_ranko
      @_ranko 2 месяца назад

      @@CrizzyEyes bro if you sit down the dick points outside the bowl you will still need to push down, and it's just a worse position tf

    • @MoostachedSaiyanPrince
      @MoostachedSaiyanPrince 2 месяца назад

      When I have this problem (at home), I just stand far back enough that I don't have to aim down, or even grip it. I've developed really good accuracy with it.

    • @zerrodefex
      @zerrodefex 2 месяца назад +2

      @@CrizzyEyes If I can't bend it down far enough while standing then sitting down will only be worse, I'll just be pissing onto the ceiling instead.

  • @devranyilmaz9806
    @devranyilmaz9806 2 месяца назад +39

    Leader? No such thing. At, least, not for any substantial length of time.
    If someone IS calling the shots and have been doing so for a long time in your group, they probably aren’t your friend.

    • @Zimon_Sombie
      @Zimon_Sombie 2 месяца назад +10

      Each gang has a de facto talker, fighter, runner, tank, organizer and clown. Many more positions exist within a gang however a gang is built by necessity, not excess. You don't send the whole gang to buy fries and soda, just the runner or the talker, depending on current funds. Just like how you don't send the face or the clown to deal with upset as*holes! The organizer is the one who organizes most things but he's not the leader, nobody is. Everyone has their role and takes charge when a need arises, the organizer and the brain just helps prevent major f*ck-ups... Sometimes. Alright fine, 8% of the time, guys won't do stupìd shìt!

    • @ultraman5168
      @ultraman5168 2 месяца назад +8

      A properly adjusted male social group is very good at following the one who is best suites to lead in a given situation. It's a problem solving strategy, not a spcial hierarchy.

    • @oxydoxxo
      @oxydoxxo 2 месяца назад +5

      Waste of time trying to explain this to them dawg

    • @javi_fc
      @javi_fc 2 месяца назад +1

      yea everyone saying this is so weird. i've seen plenty of friend groups have leaders and it's fine. it's respectful and makes sense. i think you're thinking of a tyrant or bossy person. that's not a leader, just an asshole who likes control. if i respect you and know you know what you're doing, why would i be opposed to follow your lead? makes no sense. you don't need a leader, but to say if someone is a leader then they're not your friend is insane.

  • @sailor1566
    @sailor1566 2 месяца назад +2

    When i was 16 and vacationing in cancun i bought a cuban cigar from this late open shop, must have been 2am, and went to the beach to smoke it, there was a giant rock on the edge of the beach by the water and i sat there watching the waves, this dude comes up and sits with me, we the "whats up head bob" and i passed him the cigar, for the next hour we both smoked and never said a word, when we finished smoking he did the "see ya later" head nod andnwalked back into the night and i went to bed, kinda of a cool chill experience.

  • @volrag
    @volrag 2 месяца назад +9

    So regarding the 2 pill meme: What exactly are vampire cattle? Do they have to drink the blood of other cattle or do they feed on humans, or do they still eat grass? How do you raise undead bovine exactly? If a dragon eats enough vampire cattle, is it fed for life if the cows won't die but are continuously digested? Does a dragon eventually poop out a vampire cow?

    • @KiraNightV
      @KiraNightV 2 месяца назад +1

      If you want a hyper-specific answer about the vampires: animals cannot be traditional vampires, it's a "human" curse, it's like how different diseases spreading to different species are really rare. so if they vampires and they are your "cattle", then they're just regular vampires that you own (through magic or contract) and they are docile towards you. they might even let you harvest their blood if the method is painless or if they get something in return.
      if a dragon eats a vampire and the vampire doesn't fight to get out then they'll be simply digested. there's a cap on how much vampires can regenerate without a supply of blood (no, drinking their own blood does nothing). If they can't get out of the stomach but you make the dragon drink blood then the vampire could survive and they would just be a "blood to super nutrient converter".
      If you harvest vampire blood, you can live off of it. It can sate your hunger, make you stronger, you age slower and you'll live longer. You can try to feed vampire blood to the dragons for the same or similar effects.

    • @charginginprogresss
      @charginginprogresss 2 месяца назад

      A vampire cattle is just a vampire's familiar
      A human turned by a vampire into their servant.
      You serve them, they drink your blood, they protect you.

  • @Keirnoth
    @Keirnoth 2 месяца назад +2

    What I love about these videos is Alana is like one of the boys basically hanging out with the other boys, but she's not a male so she doesn't get some of these and just immediately asks chat for clarification, and when we explain she's like "oh, that makes sense" and keeps going. Like, she doesn't even question it since chat's giving her mostly honest takes lol
    When these jokes make fun of girls she doesn't get offended or goes "that's so not true" she just laughs because she "gets it".
    If more women out there understood the boys like Alana does the world would be a more peaceful place.

  • @workout4780
    @workout4780 2 месяца назад +3

    Beards might be "the same" as makeup but growing a beard is a natural body function

  • @jboy_5517
    @jboy_5517 Месяц назад +2

    26:03 granny out here spitting facts

  • @kurosan0079
    @kurosan0079 2 месяца назад +6

    "Bro" and "Dude" are the universal random-guy-friend-I-just-met names.

    • @mattia8020
      @mattia8020 2 месяца назад +1

      Oh god that happens A LOT at parties, concerts and similar places. We start talking with random guys and make a group for HOURS and when we go home we have absolutely no idea what their name was. We have this special ability to don't give a fuck about other guys backgrounds... if someone is funny and is good to talk with we don't need to know nothing else

  • @skiller5034
    @skiller5034 2 месяца назад +2

    "oh Jupiter is really close to Mars"
    At their closest point, Jupiter and Mars are 365 MILLION miles (588M km) apart.
    I wouldn't worry about it.

  • @caleb_güero
    @caleb_güero 2 месяца назад +8

    Gents. WARNING. Be careful with Turbo Piss mode. I got microcuts in my Urethra once from that and pissed blood and razor blades for a week and a half from it. BE CAUTIOUS WITH YOUR PISS STREAM.

    • @genkureshima9834
      @genkureshima9834 2 месяца назад

      It IS useful though. I've done it a lot working my first job as an attendant at a bookstore, because I didn't wanna take too long in the bathroom and leave the store as a warzone for the rest of the team to deal with.
      Eventually I stopped because I was the only one taking less than 5 - 8 minutes to come back. Now I only do it at home if I'm running late for something exceptionally important.

  • @brianrigsby7900
    @brianrigsby7900 2 месяца назад +2

    30:49 I can’t believe it took me so long…when she said sausages I got it…😂😂😂😂😂😂😂in my defense, I didn’t know what they were…at first I thought it was a messed up brick road or something😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @ThePumpkin-up7rd
    @ThePumpkin-up7rd 2 месяца назад +5

    I like how every Monday Alana watches a meme video, and then every other day it’s that the world is on fire lol

  • @thewinterprince1731
    @thewinterprince1731 2 месяца назад +2

    Pissing when you're hard is either a test of balance and flexibility to get the thing pointed down without blocking the flow with the bend, or your willingness and skill in arcing it into the air and back down in the bowl.

  • @J0kerCards
    @J0kerCards Месяц назад +2

    Gunna be honest the problem with peeing while hard isn't the peeing, it's the aim.

  • @RorytheRomulan
    @RorytheRomulan 2 месяца назад +8

    If a man is in so much pain from urination that he compares it to birthing, he got bigger problems than simply having a woody during.

    • @SolusArmatura
      @SolusArmatura 2 месяца назад +1

      My kidney stone PTSD is kicking in.... lol

  • @KonglomeratYT
    @KonglomeratYT 2 месяца назад +2

    Guys don't have leaders in their friend groups. This is my first time hearing anyone thought that was a thing.

  • @honilock577
    @honilock577 2 месяца назад +4

    12:50 Imagine going to pee and the only way you could hit directly in the toilet is if you did a handstand

  • @foxfire8284
    @foxfire8284 2 месяца назад +2

    Being offered $300,000,000 bucks while NEVER drinking alcohol again is super easy for me since I never plan on drinking alcohol.

  • @markolukic7824
    @markolukic7824 2 месяца назад +4

    Listening to Alana's jovial cackling while navigating trafic from work is a mood saver.
    p.s. I miss my granma's dumplings

  • @dragoon3219
    @dragoon3219 2 месяца назад +2

    Own 6 thousand dragons and raise cattle. Mostly because I'm curious if the two would combine to make 6 thousand vampire dragons.

  • @axxura5286
    @axxura5286 2 месяца назад +5

    the i love and calling her a b*tch is outdated instead you have to lock her in the trunk of a car with the dog for an hour and when you let them out you can find out who truly loves you cause i bet only 1 of them will be super exited to see you.

  • @jboy_5517
    @jboy_5517 Месяц назад +1

    13:46 her face when she heard the rest of the meme had me dying 🤣

  • @MessedUpBrainspike
    @MessedUpBrainspike 2 месяца назад +10

    Mmmm, not really a leader in every friend group, no. Though as you say, there usually tends to be a prominent charismatic one, or "the one who yaps the most".

  • @rickcoona
    @rickcoona 2 месяца назад +1

    Alana, Ever Laugh So Hard that Tears Ran Down your Leg?

  • @anthonyhughes1108
    @anthonyhughes1108 2 месяца назад +5

    I’ve known my best friend for five years and just now learned his last name

    • @zerrodefex
      @zerrodefex 2 месяца назад +2

      I had a friend who had a fake last name in his Facebook profile for whatever reason when I met him. Turned out I wasn't the only one who never knew his real last name either for years.

  • @Renebloom-Yt
    @Renebloom-Yt 2 месяца назад +1

    you can only pick 2 pills
    Me: blue and pink
    Alana: blue and pink
    this is the story of my new fav youtuber

  • @daveTHEdirty
    @daveTHEdirty 2 месяца назад +3

    25:12 I drink to keep my dreams away but at least now I can afford therapy

  • @andrewjones6583
    @andrewjones6583 2 месяца назад +1

    Ngl, that 2M Snapchat score one hurt on a personal level

  • @TheRealDemomKingX
    @TheRealDemomKingX 2 месяца назад +15

    This guy's got the best memes. I'd love to see him and Alana collab to react to guy memes, so there's two different points of views in one video

    • @autobotCRSHR
      @autobotCRSHR 2 месяца назад +2

      You got you, ser, have some wrinkles in your thinkles...

  • @ВиталийКотиков-т5э
    @ВиталийКотиков-т5э Месяц назад

    The structure of my friend group: a guy who provides the spot to hangout and organizes the drinks; a guy who usually backs up the party with his funds if others are low at money at the moment and DMs the tabletop games; a humorous chill guy who lightens up the atmosphere and tends the hooker and tabacoo; a kind of a smartass guy (me) who doesn't drink, humour others with stories from abroad or helps translating stuff from English and feeds and tends to friends' pets while looking after and protecting my friends id they get too drunk and recless.

  • @SevEvoimaru
    @SevEvoimaru 2 месяца назад +17

    6:47 fun fact ladies: any dude who is picky is a douche canoe by default when virtually every normal nice guy is happy & content with you looking natural. We'll be fine with you looking at your most pristine & at your gremmalun. Bc we have no pride, only appreciation for you existing. Ladies, stay golden, stay sweet, we'll be here waiting, & we'll be doing so with warm tears of gratitude & opening arms of acceptance for when you all stop being so unnecessarily edgy & uninstigatedly mean.

    • @combativeThinker
      @combativeThinker 2 месяца назад +6

      No hymen, no diamond. Anything less is dooming yourself and any children you may have to a life of misery.

    • @SevEvoimaru
      @SevEvoimaru 20 дней назад +1

      @@combativeThinker no hymen no diamond? I need to look that up, I've never heard that phrase before.

  • @nicholasdonohue7936
    @nicholasdonohue7936 2 месяца назад +1

    friend group leader is generally the guy who is most qualified at the time, motived everyone to get together or pitches the best idea during. Often option A and B go hand in hand. Essentially, its a revolving door and everyone gets a chance up to plate but can shift wildly throughout an evening based on circumstance.

  • @autobotCRSHR
    @autobotCRSHR 2 месяца назад +4

    0:51 im gone... thats too frelling funny...
    EDIT: 16:15 He didn't stick to the script!
    EDIT 2 Electric Boogaloo: 40:40 her response was so quick!

  • @sumojd5670
    @sumojd5670 2 месяца назад +4

    Bro a pirate owning 6k dragons seems like it could be a dope One Piece Arc! anybody??

  • @DRida64
    @DRida64 Месяц назад

    33:22 , you have a very accurate "angry mom" voice, despite how in this example you're yelling about your mom.

  • @glitchyboi-nk1qv
    @glitchyboi-nk1qv 2 месяца назад +3

    25:11 jokes on you! I DON’T DRINK!

  • @MW-cx3sb
    @MW-cx3sb 2 месяца назад +1

    lol my group we all pretty much take turns leading I guess. Like we all seem to be witty and come up with shit on the fly while still able to make small talk and carry a conversation. Probably because we are also all public speakers who do presentations as a career lol

  • @Hawkcam1996
    @Hawkcam1996 2 месяца назад +5

    31:14 So this girl’s idea of getting back at men…is giving him a free meal and no strings attached sex? Does she really think that’s a punishment to a man?

  • @SentinalSlice
    @SentinalSlice 2 месяца назад

    7:01 this was me! And you always got to line it up with the widest point on each side. There’s an art to it, because you need to eyeball the first point, or your move the mouse up as straight as possible. And still have to eyeball another part of it.

  • @JackDespero
    @JackDespero 2 месяца назад +7

    12:55 It is obviously not as painful as childbirth by any stretch of the imagination, but it is also designed specifically so that you cannot urine while hard (since urine and semen share the same canal, it basically blocks one or the other depending on your "state"). Just like trying to breath while drinking: Your airway is designed to close when swallowing.
    If you try to force it, it will be painful and it will leave an itchy sensation along your urethra, which is the absolute worst because you get the feeling that you need to pee but you have already peed.

  • @raidkoast
    @raidkoast Месяц назад +1

    The leader of the group is situational. Amongst my friends It's dependent on who is the most competent in the situation.
    Also the making shit up... I have a thing when I go out on the motorcycle. I set a minimum speed. There's a demon flying after me. If I go below, It gets me.
    Gets kinda interesting at night.
    Also, next time I get a fever, imma check the cold balls thing. Bruh.

  • @juanemarek
    @juanemarek 2 месяца назад +5

    29:05 her laughter sounds like a fox.

  • @MoZ1899
    @MoZ1899 2 месяца назад +1

    We don't have a leader, we just have a "glue" if that makes sense. Our hangout will be better with him being present but we'll just do fine without him because we'll just appoint another glue in his place without even realising.
    We can also hangout for hours with people we just knew a second ago, learning from each other abt myriad of subjects we didn't know before. We're also flexible, in terms of choosing our circle, meaning that we can just join any empty seat full of strangers & become best friends 10 minutes later without having any similar hobbies or interests.
    We're also efficient in communications, meaning that we can undertand each other just by saying few words like "the usual at 8, order us the usual, tia" & "you have 12? Bike's acting up again" or simply nod our heads for many things we can instantly understand in many different contexts

  • @LikesToArgueOverNothing
    @LikesToArgueOverNothing 2 месяца назад +6

    It's funny how women get mad if A man fat shames them but they always Short shame men. I can't control my high but you can control what you stuff in your face. (we are not talking about people who have medical conditions here so just keep that to yourself)

    • @mattia8020
      @mattia8020 2 месяца назад +1

      They're generally more picky. We usually would be happy even if an absolutely average woman finds us interesting and wants to stay with us but they usually don't even look at average guys because if you're not built like LeBron, rich and absolutely handsome you're worthless. Obviously there are exceptions but generally it is like that

  • @Ryuondo
    @Ryuondo 2 месяца назад +1

    As a male, I have only been in a friend group with "leaders" prior to high school. So in elementary and middle school. And it really was just the person willing to manipulate everyone else into what he wants. There was no leadership at all. And as someone who leads for 45 hours a week at work, shits exhausting. Especially the constant disappointment. The only time theres any leadership going on in my friend group is when we're playing Sea of Thieves or Void Crew.
    Outside of that, I have 0 time to wrangle my tards in my free time. And they have 0 time to wrangle me in there's.

    • @CrizzyEyes
      @CrizzyEyes 2 месяца назад +1

      Yeah it's a brainstorming session of "What do we want to do today" and the first person who suggests an idea that isn't abjectly terrible gets accepted. Nobody is trying to put in a ton of effort.