What's wrong with taking a break from dating anyway? Don't know why people are so dependant on others to get better. If you can pick yourself up you can get through anything.
I'm with Jeannie 100%. Just because that person left you and is moving on, doesn't necessarily mean he/she is ok or happy. They could be just as miserable as you, but they’re expressing it differently. Personally, I choose not to move to the next guy until my heart is completely healed.
A.G. Fr sometimes you can’t even fake it! Like you’re just completely not interested no matter how hard you try or want to like someone else! And it sucks 🥴😞 timing is everything though. Sometimes you do need that time to yourself to bounce back
I don't agree with Tamar. I don't have time to try and make my ex jealous while messing with another person's feelings. Shows that you aren't really moving on because you are so focused on trying to make them jealous.
+bri gomez Tamar is only thinking about herself, but not necessarily in a bad way. She's basically saying, get out there and have fun, enjoy yourself and don't sit around feeling sorry for yourself or holding back because of the ex. I think Adrienne hit the best compromise saying to go out and but make sure that the expectations are clear.
What Adrienne said is a great compromise. If you want to have a grand old time, go out and do it, BUT always be honest with that person cuz there is nothing like catching feelings and the other person with 3 other guys or girls.
Thank you GOD for Tamera! She speaks for classy women that seem to not exist anymore.. Plus she makes it okay to be old school! Jeannie Mai has good points too but she cant get a word in with loud ass Loni and Tamar Braxton! Lol
I never said that! I am saying in general Tamera is classy which she is in MY opinion..and yes it is distasteful to lead someone on just to get over someone else!
YourOwn Beautiful I don't think that's what she's saying. My take on it is, it seems as if being "old school" is not the right thing to do anymore. Almost as if it's wrong for everyone. But like Tamera said, it worked for her. It's nothing wrong with multi-dating if that's how your mindset works. Like some people can have casual sex and be totally okay with it but some people just can't do that. Just like it's nothing wrong with waiting and healing before you move on. I say as long as both parties are aware of the circumstances and where the other person stands, and most importantly IS SAFE when it comes to having sex.. do you!
Maya Alexandra But who said you're leading someone on, if you're up front about not being serious? And it's not like you're sleeping with them. So again, that's not misleading someone. And as stated, if you're not in a serious, long-term, or engagement type of relationship, what's the problem? If you're single, there is nothing wrong with exploring your options. Nobody said have sex with or lie to these people.
Girl Loni barley spoke so your just just nitpicking, and Jeannie Mai needs to speak up if she wants to be heard. I heard her point and I heard Tamars point they both just have different deliveries and that's why the show is called the real because in the real world no one is going to be quiet just so you can speak up!
I totally agree with Tamera & Jeanie on this one, Tamar is just being childish. Having lead a guy on in order to get over another one I ended up really hurting his feelings. I felt horrible because he was actually a nice guy, plus it didn't help anything because my ex still wasn't checking for me. When you play with people's emotions no good can come to you. And to knowingly do so is just mean and selfish. Now it's different if you're honest & upfront with the other person. If they know that they're just the rebound, & cool with it, then it's ok. They could even be friends with benefits, but the point is leading someone on is mean & hurtful. If women don't want to be treated like toys then don't treat men like them. Karma is a bitch.
And believe karmic energy is really sometime when you treat people like that you get dumbfounded when your in the same situation with someone you like.
+nazineful it's not even old school; it's being considerate. If you're hung up on someone, you're just using the other person. It's completely selfish and childish. You don't need to be with someone to find value in yourself.
Good for Tamera for standing up for what she believes! I'm an old school kind of person and I'm not in a hurry to get into another relationship just to get over the last one. I can definitely wait for the right one to come along and in the mean time, focus on getting myself right and keeping it right. Our lives don't end because we're not in a relationship with a man. We weren't born in a relationship, were we? There is nothing wrong with just living your life and enjoying it to the fullest with family and friends. When the right one comes along, he can be added to the joy that you've already established before him and if something happens to him,, you'll go on living without him.
Why do you always need to be with someone though?? Like why do you always need a man? Its like a rebound. Trying to make your ex jealous isnt getting over them. Honestly thought this was so stupid. Love tamera. Work on yourself first. If it makes you feel better, get a haircut, talk to people closest to you, got out and have fun. Getting back into a new relationship with someone you are just using to make you feel better might hurt the other person. So unfair.
Yes! As for me personally, I prefer to spend plenty of time with the Lord to help me with my issues, not quickly latch on to the next finest walking by.
It not about making anyone jealous its about the hurt you feel inside that makes you go nuts. So after a couple days its like you can't take it anymore so you find someone who can help the process move along quicker
"If you're not in an engagement or married, you should multi-date." .....Now how the hell do you expect to get engaged if you date several people at once?
+Keke B. When you find the one who you are interested in the most and feel most compatible with, you drop the other ones. I personal choose not to multidate but I understand how it works. Majority of the time, men are not dating just one woman in the beginning.
So because some people are doing it, it makes it right for everyone else to do it? And when you 'drop the other ones', what if they thought it was getting serious and you just drop/cut them off?
Tamar needs to get her life! Only little girls with no common sense go out and date different men to try and make their ex jealous... if you're a real woman like tamera and Jeanie u would get urself together and refocused on your feelings and yourself before you jump into another man's arms. That's so trashy in my opinion. I agree with tamera, Thank you for speaking up for the old school women!
If you're getting into another relationship shortly after the break up for the sake of making him or her jealous you're not doing this for yourself then. See once you get out of a relationship everything that you do should be done to heal YOURSELF. Don't worry about what the other party is doing. I'm not about to hurt somebody's feelings because they find out I was just using them. But that's just me, first I have to mend my heart before I go mess with other people.
I love tamera and jeanie. Their opinions are so applicable to me. I don't jump around to guys to guys after breaking up. I need my own time to get myself back up, and most importantly, get my happiness back. You don't need a man to justify who you are. so props to both tamera and jeanie.
I love the difference of opinion on this show. I feel like anyone watching can find their viewpoint represented. And just so people know, "multi-date" does not mean "multi-SCREW"! Lol I can already hear people about to comment and say "they're encouraging promiscuity" and they're totally not
Exactly, LOL. Now I'm old school/traditional in many ways. But I also know things have progressed and there are different ways to do things now. Like Tamara said, if the old school method fits you and your personality more, then by all means do it that way. if that doesn't work for you, then do what works for you and your lifestyle.
I wish Jeanne was more assertive with expressing her view. Whenever shes in the middle of a sentence she lets them cut her off as if the middle of her sentence interrupted the beginning of theirs. GTFOH! If I was her I would continue talking and raise my voice higher until they stfu and let me finish my statement. WTF. Jeanne is too couretous to those who dont deserve it.
Tamar's ex husband and whoever else she dated jaded the mess outta her, Jeannie and Tamera are right, don't hi around rebounding potentially hurting someone else because you're hurt. Adrienne was right as well, be honest.
You have to have that mending period. You can't get over an old flame by dating a new one. That's brining so much baggage in the "rebound" relationship!
Girls DO NOT date just one guy! the guys have multiple women to call, there's no reason for you not to have back ups also. Doesn't mean you have to sleep with them, just have someone to have a good time with, some one else to talk to. And DO NOT let go of them until the boy you really want to date asks you to be exclusive! Because that's when you can ask him to get rid of his back ups too. I wish somebody would of told me this when I was young. It would of saved me a lot of trouble.
Hun I couldn't agree with you more. I have the same philosophy. My friends goes, nah, yak thats wrong. Its bc they lack how to separate havin a good time, enjoying someone's company from havin s×x. Once they start to see someone, they jump into intimacy before they have this discussion. If at all; assuming, I do the same. I tell them. No. Datin is not the same as being exclusive or in a relationship. U can date someone and not have s*x with him or her untill you define clearly what you have going on. Knw what you want, clearly communicate it, lead with example, and watch the world follow your lead. Thou a woman should definitely date a few guys untill a man verbally says to her, 'I johnny john lol want to be in a relationship with you.' Will you be exclusive with me and be my woman or girlfriend." If you feel the same, say so and state clearly how you expect to be treated in the relationship. Women are in so much control, yet many of us forget this easily. But hey, we all have diff approach. Btw. This is a gal commentin via my cousin's acoount :).
To add to that. This works. In the last month, I've had two of the guys I dated in this fashion, come out and verbally asked me out. One took me to meet his entire fam even before he had the talk with me. The guy comtemplated this months and carefully choose to state his intention on the 1st of this yr, bc he wanted it to be memorable. When u make the guy work and wait, he will go above and beyond to state his intent. I'm not sayin, u shudnt date one guy at a time of thats wat u find traditional. All I'm sayin, is, knw what you and act like it. The guys know they wont get anythin from me unless we're committed or have a title. Plus, I will not have a secret relationship or be in one where I know not one signifcant member of the person's fam. Datin mutiple is healthy bc it allows u to express urself without leadin all hope on one person. Let the guy work hard to earn you and secondly let him state clearly his intentions you do the same. This has nothin to do with playin with ppls feelings. Infact, let the guys knw you have other options but say so in a casual way. For ex. "Im willin to walk away from a man if he doesnt treat me how I expect to be treated. I believe there will always be amazin ppl to meet and someone out there for me bc I'm constantly meetin new people." If u say this in casual and friendly tone, any smart guy will want to get his ish togthr bc he knws u feel that great abt urself that at any moment he could lose u to someone else wen he doesnt treat you right. Ladies cmon. You are thr bsckbone of this world.
I agree...after a while the different conversations with each guy all start mesh together and you forget who's who... I'd rather do maybe a team of 2 and replace as needed.
j81jevon LOLLLL Team of two. Yes! So when one guy is out, the team of two needs to be replaced LOL! Or when one is out, you replace with another. Like a tournament.
Jennie is right about getting yourself together before you start heavily dating again. But Tamar was right also about not sitting in the house all day crying over someone who didn't appreciate you. You don't have to rush into a relationship but you can go out and have a good time life goes on
i agree with tamera and jeanie, it's better to get back in the game when your good and ready. tamar is thinking like a man, you don't need to always front and we all know how men get over a break up
Last season they were all talking over Tamera and this season their all cutting off Jeanie. I love this show and all the personalities but this whole cutting each other off is not a good look for a group of grown ass women.
Lol the do the same thing at the view but at least they can get a word in. Jeannie doesn't even get a chance to breathe like come on? But she had to be more aggressive if she wants to keep this job!!
Brooklyn Clarke I agree but she shouldn't have to yell just to get her point across. But I guess that's why one reason why they can't hear her because their all loud. I also don't think it's intentional thing that they do. They learn sooner or later.
Danielle A. lol yeah they need to learn conversation skills but the main loud mouths Tamar, Loni and Adrienne need to learn to let the other 2 finish speaking. If you notice Jeannie and Tamera always let them finish but they cut them off as soon as they disagree with what they have to say.
Multidating maybe what you might want when you're young and just having fun. But if you are pretty serious about relationships, like me, I don't think it's a nice thing to do. Whatever it is, you decided to consider that man/woman a part of your life. The least you can do is show some respect to that relationship.
victoria hale Well I don't care if I'm 35 or 45, I want to be married to someone I can trust. If I want to find someone who I can trust, they should be able to trust me. Like I said, it is different for everybody. You do whatever fits for you.
I love them all. Tamar is crazy and hilarious. Adrienne is so cute and sweet and funny. Jeannie is adorable, Tamera is so soft spoken and kind & Loni is funnyyyy 😂 perfect mix
multi dating just cause messy situations I dont understand how you can get to know someone when your attention is divided between multiple ppl...dating one is hard enough why the hell would you want to date multiple ppl,my schedule is too busy for that
exactly! what i hate the most tho is they are calling it that in my opinion they really shouldn't. dating rather from the past or 2016 should still mean dating one person and that person only.
Team Jeannie and Tamera. Unless your going to be up front and honest like Adrienne said I AM NOT YOUR REBOUND. If you're not over your ex don't drag me into your mess and start using me. The best revenge is showing you can do bad all by yourself .
I love Tamar but why did she always speak like she knows best? She needs to understand and value other people's options. I think Jeannie has a point. Also what is wrong with some me time being single?
I agree with Jeannie and Tamera. Be ok with yourself first. Don't go around using and hurting people to feel better about yourself. It's unfair, and in that way, you're becoming just like the person that hurt you!!
There is nothing worse than someone leading you onto thinking that you mean so much to them just to find out that you've been taking second place or lower until somebody better leaves their life. I personally don't have it in me to ever multi-date. Also I don't have the time and energy to waste it on making my ex's jealous! Once they're done, they're canceled for life, no contact again whatsoever!
I used 2 believe that another man (aka the rebound) would make me get over my ex quicker (& to each his/her own), but now I think that you should allow yourself to heal or just focus on yourself & have fun... be single for a while & when you have the right connection w/ some1, then you try it again.
"you gotta protect your heart" "date him, even if he's not the one" Wise advice is to Love you, respect you and that's how you are able to show and give the same to others.
I agree with Tamar. It may seem childish , but its the best way to keep your confidence up and to keep you from sulking . Break ups sucks so the best thing to do is to get out and meet people. NOT stay in the house. You don't have to "date " another guy or be serious , but have some fun ( have a one night stand maybe) , its actually refreshing.
I agree with both, Tamar and Jeanie. But just the fact that Tamar was just smashing on Jeanie's thought of mind wasn't good. Every one works in their own way. I think when I was younger, I thought more like Tamar but as I grew up and became a woman, I thought more like Jeanie in this situation.Overall though, Adrienne, got it right here!
I agree with Tamar, if that guy is out there having fun like you never even existed to them why do you have to be at home crying over it? You can go have fun too just don't rush into a relationship.
Do you all remember when you used to double Dutch back in the day and that moment when you'd wait for the perfect time to jump in but you'd have a false start and decide to go back to your starting point and try again? Well that's how poor Jeannie is during the conversations. She's just trying to jump in the rope but no one is letting her get a turn. Once again I saw thought bubbles that read:shut up Meg! Poor Jeannie
Honestly I think loud mouth Tamar needs to tune down and Loni with her condescending jokes to Tamera need to stop it's so corny. Loni is trying to portray this big confident woman I don't need a man role...does that get tiring? I understand she doesn't want kids but don't you eventually want a partner? This must be a fake persona for the show.
Honestly I think loud mouth Tamar needs to tune down and Loni with her condescending jokes to Tamera need to stop it's so carry. Loni is trying to portray this big confident woman I don't need a man role...does that get tiring? I understand she doesn't want kids but don't you eventually want a partner? This must be a fake persona for the show.
Brooklyn Clarke YESSS!! I was just talking to my friend about that the other day. Loni plays that stereotypical bacon eating big black woman who don't need a man...BS! And I'm sorry, but I don't even believe she's been dating all the people she says she's been dating. I've come across people like her who lie about their relationships to try and keep up with everyone else. It's sad really. But if she's not lying, I apologize lol
paigea92 Like I understand the show needs comedic relief to keep it fun and light but EVERY episode its "I hate kids, I don't need a man, us fluffy girls need to stick together". Reminds me of Monique back in the day when she would bash skinny/slim girls and LOOK at Monique now she lost all that flubber and is at a healthy size. It was all just a damn gimmick.
I'm with Tamar when she said she wouldn't lay around and pick herself apart because someone didn't see the value in her. I don't have time for that, she's right someone else is going to see it eventually. Just move on! It's all you can do!
Tamar shouldn't have cut off Jeanie b/c she was making a valid point- if you date someone new and then they end up falling for you while you know they're just your rebound then it's not fair for the new guy/girl. I wouldn't want to just serve as a placeholder as someone's girl, while they're not even that into me. Call me when you're ready to really like/love me, okay?!
I got my heart broken badly about a year ago and even though I took a break to try and mend myself, I was never able to get over that person until I met someone else and became completely infatuated. It's true, sometimes that hurt or void a person leaves needs to be replaced by something else, it could be a person or a hobby, a career choice, a move, etc.
I agree with Tamar at some points. I'm not about to be sulking around at home, crying, eating ice cream, and watching Waiting to Exhale for the millionth time while my ex is out popping bottles and getting his life. Take a moment and let it out, brush it off, find a new man or yourself as Tamera said and get over it.
This is only ONE example of why Tamar's firing should not have been a shock to anyone. Her advice was HORRIBLE! Selfish and childish playing with somebody's emotions while you figure yours out is noting but a surefire recipe for disaster.
Becky Thomas But even in the audience you could see how many people fervently agreed with her. It may not be pc, but its the honestly what a lot of people do. I really wouldnt want to watch tamera give her holier than thou opinion all day long. I liked the diversity tbh
I can sort of see what Tamar is saying, but Jeannie is right. That's not fair to the guy. Plus, how would you feel if it were the other way around and the guy you like is using that same tactic do get over his ex or make his ex jealous? Is that fair? I don't understand why you have to jump into another relationship just to make your ex feel worse/ They're your ex for a reason, who cares what he/she thinks? If you work on yourself first, you'll be strong a more mature to handle whatever comes your way, including your ex.
Secondly, I LOVE Tamar, but that is incredibly stupid. You never take advice on how to make millions from someone who is drowning in debt. It's basic basic *basic* wisdom. And if you just got hurt by someone who "failed to see your value", where is the sense in jumping straight into a position where you could be guilty of the same?!
i agree with Adrienne, it helps to have a rebound but let that person know you're not looking for a serious relationship just yet so they know not to get too attached
See, I think the problem with "Monkey bar dating" is that a lot of the pain and difficulty of breaking up/discontinuing to see someone is that you are used to getting a certain amount of attention from that person and when that ends, its a big adjustment. So what you do when you multi date or monkey bar date is instead of figuring out how to be okay with yourself even though you don't get that kind of attention from others, you find someone else to fill that void of attention the other person left. I think its so crucial, especially for us women because we're typically more emotionally dependent on others, that we figure out how to be single (and when I say single, I mean totally and completely independent. Only getting affection and attention ourselves and from God and not a man) and confident in ourselves. I think the more time you spend between relationships working on bouncing back to depending on yourself, the easier it gets and the more independent and whole you are when the right person comes along that you will be with for the long term.
I really dont think she gone lose that money adversetoconverse she crazy but I dont think she is that crazy. Vince is the whole reason why she is relevant now. Vince is a producer on BFV Tamar and Vince and has a part in this show.
STFU Tamera is actually getting outside of her comfort zone because of the girls you need to stop hating they all have insecurities even Tamera OLD school dating for everyone so have several seats in the Yankee Stadium thank hun , you're dismissed.
I agree with Tamar and Loni on this because in today’s world dating is harsh and like Tamar said I’m not going to be the one sad and scrolling through old photos while u out living your best life bc I put my ALL into someone ...that person has to give u a reason to COMPLETELY close all your other options
The problem with what Tamar is saying is that you don't mend or heal yourself. You postpone a breakdown from not taking care of yourself. Its good to date but doing it when you aren't ready and only doing it for the other person to get jealous and not for you only hurts you in the end.
I m Asian , and I love this show even I cannot watch it fm Japan , but only fm RUclips. Thanks for sharing out! However, would you guys pls let JEANNIE talk ? She has some words to say , and like others
Jeannie’s point of view is obviously the unpopular one but is also the realest. Guys the last thing you wanna do when you get out of a relationship is text, call, meet up or even be with anyone else. If you’re still doing that and you’re 25 and over…you haven’t matured yet. Let alone go front on social media about the fact that you’re hanging out or having “fun” with someone else…because we all know that only lasts us a couple of hours and then you get home, remember that you’re still hurt because is only normal, and then start crying. So what’s the point on dating right after a breakup ? I’ve been there so many times and that’s actually the worst thing you can do. The best thing you can do is unfollow them from everywhere and act like you could care less about what they’re doing and FOCUS 100% on YOU!!! Until you finally move on…trust me is not worth it 😎
I found the “monkey bars” analogy amusing, but I don’t agree with it. Of course it doesn’t feel good to see an ex moving on as if the relationship didn’t mean anything, and no you shouldn’t sit around and wallow in your misery. But you also shouldn't go out and grab someone to aide you in pretending to not be affected by the breakup and/or make your ex jealous. Chill with your friends. Spend time with your family. Have a date night with your damn self. Work on YOU. Why not learn to let go and land on your feet? Because another thing I know about monkey bars: they don’t go on forever. And if you reach the end and can’t let go of the last monkey bar without having another one to grab onto, you’re in trouble. #TeamOldSchool!
I see comments saying that it's selfish and unclassy to date multiple guys. What about the 99% of males who talk to 4-5 different girls?! There should be no problem with us females to multi-date. END OF DISCUSSION
It took me about 2 years to get over my first love and I wasn't really a girl people would call up to go on a date with so I just accepted not going out and then I met my current man and fell hard once we were together for a bit because I finally was over my ex. Now I have been with my man now for going on 3 years. He came at the pefecf time. I was finally getting over my first love and before I got too lonely and use to it Alex came into my life. But I never went and played around, I just lived my life the way I did, even if it was just chilling alone for a few years.
Multi Dating is thoroughly essential as long as you’re not using it as a way to heal! Multi Dating is effective when you’re whole & merely just figuring out what you want! Playing with someone’s feelings is dangerous! If you choose to involve with another being while trying to get over another, lay out all it is & will never be! An understanding is powerful! P.S. Tamar! You can heal without picking yourself apart! Accountability is important!
lol I always thought that but it's not true and maybe that's just me. so i ended up just taking a break for a while from dudes and did my own thing with friends.
I agree w Jeanie n Tamera u dont have to be forever desperate to find a bf/gf, and dating multiple people at the same time is wrong on so many level unless they all know what u r doing. and dont come over and cry a river when ur man cheats on u, he was just multi dating just like u.
I mean if you want to go date other people to get over someone go for it whatever helps you cope, just as long as you don’t hurt the other person in the process, because nowadays people wanna date to find the “one” not to just casually date
As far as the whole multi-dating concept goes, my grandmother actually did a slight variation of it in her youth. She dated 3 different guys at the same time, my grandfather and 2 other guys. She claims that the men involved didn't know about each other and she had a set day for dates with each guy. Obviously, the other 2 eventually fell by the wayside and she stuck with my grandfather for over 50 years
YAAAAAAAAAAAS TAMAR! I'm not sitting at home wrecking my brain either because he couldn't see how fabulous I am. On to the next one but with my guard UP.
Anytime you try to rush and rebound after a breakup, you end up picking the wrong person and usually you're miserable with this new person because you don't really like them. Then when they don't measure up to your ex you feel even worse and miss him/her 10x more
I don’t agree. I don’t believe in opening one door until the other is closed but I will admit, It’s a very lonely and painful process. if I dated someone new and my liking for him doesn’t outweigh the feelings I had for the previous guy, i suffer more because then I think about them the entire time . It just doesn’t fulfill me. Meanwhile, the guy who hurt me is in love & moved on quickly and I’m stuck picking up the pieces.
all of them have some good points. I don`t like the making your ex jealous part, but he will definitely realize what he has lost! I appreciate Tamera and and Jeanie`s point re: the healing aspect. But when you`er hurt you just want to get rid of it ..not saying one should jump into something right after a break up..but u want to get out the house and have fun with your girlfriends ..if a guy checking you.. let him know you`re not looking for spouse right now you just want to let your hair down.. Heartbreaks hurt like hell but are survivable!
Yes Sir! Work on yourself first! the right person will come along when he/she is supposed to come along. No need to make anyone jealous what are you 12? Really!!! When you are mature enough to be in a serious relationship mind games wont be necessary. 100% agree with Tamera and Jeannie! If you act like a lady be expected to be treated like one but don't act the opposite and be expected to be treated as a lady.
What's wrong with taking a break from dating anyway? Don't know why people are so dependant on others to get better. If you can pick yourself up you can get through anything.
+✧ ᴍᴊᴊlᴜᴠᴇʀ87 True
lmao welcome to America.idk why folks can't stay single for a second.Damn!
Don't be so judgemental.
that's what I'm saying
Insecurity..
multidate? i cant even find one person to like
IKR where are they finding all of these people? lol and I don't have energy for all of that either.
Laura Rizik true that 😂
Laura Rizik o hellllll yes bc im waitin 4 da 1 .
Lmfao werd so picky
@@sianburke2282 I Feel you😣
I agree with Adrienne. As long as you're honest, it's OK
Enjinks I’m with Adrienne too just be upfront and honest that’s a turn on for me
Enjinks 3333for is welcome to the 3
because at least you’re giving the chance for the other person to decide what they want too- communication is key
Enjinks I’m with that too!!!
Nobody needs to know till you're in a relationship
I'm with Jeannie 100%. Just because that person left you and is moving on, doesn't necessarily mean he/she is ok or happy. They could be just as miserable as you, but they’re expressing it differently. Personally, I choose not to move to the next guy until my heart is completely healed.
amanda kenya thank you !! She’s the fakest one and y’all letting her fool you
A.G. Fr sometimes you can’t even fake it! Like you’re just completely not interested no matter how hard you try or want to like someone else! And it sucks 🥴😞 timing is everything though. Sometimes you do need that time to yourself to bounce back
I don't agree with Tamar. I don't have time to try and make my ex jealous while messing with another person's feelings. Shows that you aren't really moving on because you are so focused on trying to make them jealous.
Exactly! That's not fair to the new person.
+bri gomez Tamar is only thinking about herself, but not necessarily in a bad way. She's basically saying, get out there and have fun, enjoy yourself and don't sit around feeling sorry for yourself or holding back because of the ex. I think Adrienne hit the best compromise saying to go out and but make sure that the expectations are clear.
I get that part. But I don't agree with trying to make someone jealous. I think it is just petty But I agree with making your expectations clear.
I am talking about 2:35 and what I see her attitude to be. Has nothing to do with hating her. haha.
She petty af
it's not old school it's called having empathy
agree
I guess they still call it Old School because a lot of people lack empathy nowadays.
true
🔥
What isit?
What Adrienne said is a great compromise. If you want to have a grand old time, go out and do it, BUT always be honest with that person cuz there is nothing like catching feelings and the other person with 3 other guys or girls.
Thank you GOD for Tamera! She speaks for classy women that seem to not exist anymore.. Plus she makes it okay to be old school! Jeannie Mai has good points too but she cant get a word in with loud ass Loni and Tamar Braxton! Lol
soo multi dating makes you not classy?
I never said that! I am saying in general Tamera is classy which she is in MY opinion..and yes it is distasteful to lead someone on just to get over someone else!
YourOwn Beautiful I don't think that's what she's saying. My take on it is, it seems as if being "old school" is not the right thing to do anymore. Almost as if it's wrong for everyone. But like Tamera said, it worked for her. It's nothing wrong with multi-dating if that's how your mindset works. Like some people can have casual sex and be totally okay with it but some people just can't do that. Just like it's nothing wrong with waiting and healing before you move on. I say as long as both parties are aware of the circumstances and where the other person stands, and most importantly IS SAFE when it comes to having sex.. do you!
Maya Alexandra But who said you're leading someone on, if you're up front about not being serious? And it's not like you're sleeping with them. So again, that's not misleading someone. And as stated, if you're not in a serious, long-term, or engagement type of relationship, what's the problem? If you're single, there is nothing wrong with exploring your options. Nobody said have sex with or lie to these people.
Girl Loni barley spoke so your just just nitpicking, and Jeannie Mai needs to speak up if she wants to be heard. I heard her point and I heard Tamars point they both just have different deliveries and that's why the show is called the real because in the real world no one is going to be quiet just so you can speak up!
I totally agree with Tamera & Jeanie on this one, Tamar is just being childish. Having lead a guy on in order to get over another one I ended up really hurting his feelings. I felt horrible because he was actually a nice guy, plus it didn't help anything because my ex still wasn't checking for me. When you play with people's emotions no good can come to you. And to knowingly do so is just mean and selfish. Now it's different if you're honest & upfront with the other person. If they know that they're just the rebound, & cool with it, then it's ok. They could even be friends with benefits, but the point is leading someone on is mean & hurtful. If women don't want to be treated like toys then don't treat men like them. Karma is a bitch.
And believe karmic energy is really sometime when you treat people like that you get dumbfounded when your in the same situation with someone you like.
Chrissy c you said it so perfectly and i totally agree with you
It's written beautifully I agree amen
+Chrissy c I agree with you, make sure their cool with it. I also agree with Tamar.
I so agree with your comment.
I'm with Tamera and Jeannie!!! Old skool dater! Woop
+nazineful Me too
+nazineful it's not even old school; it's being considerate. If you're hung up on someone, you're just using the other person. It's completely selfish and childish. You don't need to be with someone to find value in yourself.
I agree with Tamera you have to work on yourself first, a lot of issues the root of it is not having self-love.
Good for Tamera for standing up for what she believes! I'm an old school kind of person and I'm not in a hurry to get into another relationship just to get over the last one. I can definitely wait for the right one to come along and in the mean time, focus on getting myself right and keeping it right. Our lives don't end because we're not in a relationship with a man. We weren't born in a relationship, were we? There is nothing wrong with just living your life and enjoying it to the fullest with family and friends. When the right one comes along, he can be added to the joy that you've already established before him and if something happens to him,, you'll go on living without him.
Amen! They make it seem like you HAVE to have a man to be happy. Needing someone for your happiness is giving them too much power in your life.
Why do you always need to be with someone though?? Like why do you always need a man? Its like a rebound. Trying to make your ex jealous isnt getting over them. Honestly thought this was so stupid. Love tamera. Work on yourself first. If it makes you feel better, get a haircut, talk to people closest to you, got out and have fun. Getting back into a new relationship with someone you are just using to make you feel better might hurt the other person. So unfair.
I agree 100%
Agree!
Yes! As for me personally, I prefer to spend plenty of time with the Lord to help me with my issues, not quickly latch on to the next finest walking by.
Amen ^^
It not about making anyone jealous its about the hurt you feel inside that makes you go nuts. So after a couple days its like you can't take it anymore so you find someone who can help the process move along quicker
"If you're not in an engagement or married, you should multi-date."
.....Now how the hell do you expect to get engaged if you date several people at once?
yeesss!
You date several people until you find the one to be committed to....
+Keke B. When you find the one who you are interested in the most and feel most compatible with, you drop the other ones. I personal choose not to multidate but I understand how it works. Majority of the time, men are not dating just one woman in the beginning.
Exactly. Should he be multi dating too? I had no idea what she was talking about.
So because some people are doing it, it makes it right for everyone else to do it? And when you 'drop the other ones', what if they thought it was getting serious and you just drop/cut them off?
Tamar needs to get her life! Only little girls with no common sense go out and date different men to try and make their ex jealous... if you're a real woman like tamera and Jeanie u would get urself together and refocused on your feelings and yourself before you jump into another man's arms. That's so trashy in my opinion. I agree with tamera, Thank you for speaking up for the old school women!
#Tamera
Agreed! 100%!
Before you tell ANY ONE to get their life get yours...
ikhayatraining muzamba Speaking the truth really..
If you're getting into another relationship shortly after the break up for the sake of making him or her jealous you're not doing this for yourself then. See once you get out of a relationship everything that you do should be done to heal YOURSELF. Don't worry about what the other party is doing. I'm not about to hurt somebody's feelings because they find out I was just using them. But that's just me, first I have to mend my heart before I go mess with other people.
I love tamera and jeanie. Their opinions are so applicable to me.
I don't jump around to guys to guys after breaking up.
I need my own time to get myself back up, and most importantly, get my happiness back.
You don't need a man to justify who you are.
so props to both tamera and jeanie.
I love the difference of opinion on this show. I feel like anyone watching can find their viewpoint represented.
And just so people know, "multi-date" does not mean "multi-SCREW"! Lol I can already hear people about to comment and say "they're encouraging promiscuity" and they're totally not
Exactly, LOL. Now I'm old school/traditional in many ways. But I also know things have progressed and there are different ways to do things now. Like Tamara said, if the old school method fits you and your personality more, then by all means do it that way. if that doesn't work for you, then do what works for you and your lifestyle.
I wish Jeanne was more assertive with expressing her view. Whenever shes in the middle of a sentence she lets them cut her off as if the middle of her sentence interrupted the beginning of theirs. GTFOH! If I was her I would continue talking and raise my voice higher until they stfu and let me finish my statement. WTF. Jeanne is too couretous to those who dont deserve it.
Please the audience was cheering hard on Tamar point glad she cut miss politically correct off.
+annie parker That would be Tamera who is politically correct.
Jeannie knows how when to shut up and when to be assertive - that's why she's still there and NOT TAMAR 🖐🏻😜 Bye Tay-Tay!!!
ks babyg Jeannie is a ass kisser , Tay Tay has her own talk show.
+annie parker lol on her own? haha I knew it... No one wants her on their talk show.
Tamar's ex husband and whoever else she dated jaded the mess outta her, Jeannie and Tamera are right, don't hi around rebounding potentially hurting someone else because you're hurt. Adrienne was right as well, be honest.
Yeah
You have to have that mending period. You can't get over an old flame by dating a new one. That's brining so much baggage in the "rebound" relationship!
Amen!
Jeannie had it right to me
Priscilla O love Jeannie ❤️❤️🌹
Girls DO NOT date just one guy! the guys have multiple women to call, there's no reason for you not to have back ups also. Doesn't mean you have to sleep with them, just have someone to have a good time with, some one else to talk to. And DO NOT let go of them until the boy you really want to date asks you to be exclusive! Because that's when you can ask him to get rid of his back ups too.
I wish somebody would of told me this when I was young. It would of saved me a lot of trouble.
Hun I couldn't agree with you more. I have the same philosophy. My friends goes, nah, yak thats wrong. Its bc they lack how to separate havin a good time, enjoying someone's company from havin s×x. Once they start to see someone, they jump into intimacy before they have this discussion. If at all; assuming, I do the same. I tell them. No. Datin is not the same as being exclusive or in a relationship. U can date someone and not have s*x with him or her untill you define clearly what you have going on. Knw what you want, clearly communicate it, lead with example, and watch the world follow your lead. Thou a woman should definitely date a few guys untill a man verbally says to her, 'I johnny john lol want to be in a relationship with you.' Will you be exclusive with me and be my woman or girlfriend." If you feel the same, say so and state clearly how you expect to be treated in the relationship. Women are in so much control, yet many of us forget this easily. But hey, we all have diff approach. Btw. This is a gal commentin via my cousin's acoount :).
To add to that. This works. In the last month, I've had two of the guys I dated in this fashion, come out and verbally asked me out. One took me to meet his entire fam even before he had the talk with me. The guy comtemplated this months and carefully choose to state his intention on the 1st of this yr, bc he wanted it to be memorable. When u make the guy work and wait, he will go above and beyond to state his intent. I'm not sayin, u shudnt date one guy at a time of thats wat u find traditional. All I'm sayin, is, knw what you and act like it. The guys know they wont get anythin from me unless we're committed or have a title. Plus, I will not have a secret relationship or be in one where I know not one signifcant member of the person's fam. Datin mutiple is healthy bc it allows u to express urself without leadin all hope on one person. Let the guy work hard to earn you and secondly let him state clearly his intentions you do the same. This has nothin to do with playin with ppls feelings. Infact, let the guys knw you have other options but say so in a casual way. For ex. "Im willin to walk away from a man if he doesnt treat me how I expect to be treated. I believe there will always be amazin ppl to meet and someone out there for me bc I'm constantly meetin new people." If u say this in casual and friendly tone, any smart guy will want to get his ish togthr bc he knws u feel that great abt urself that at any moment he could lose u to someone else wen he doesnt treat you right. Ladies cmon. You are thr bsckbone of this world.
Dating multiple people is exhausting.
Juggling them all can literally be overwhelming.. I'd rather focus on myself. Though it can have it's perks.
I always figured MULTI meant 2. lol How are there enough days in the week to be datin 3 or 4 guys? haha
I agree...after a while the different conversations with each guy all start mesh together and you forget who's who... I'd rather do maybe a team of 2 and replace as needed.
j81jevon LOLLLL Team of two. Yes! So when one guy is out, the team of two needs to be replaced LOL! Or when one is out, you replace with another. Like a tournament.
Jennie is right about getting yourself together before you start heavily dating again. But Tamar was right also about not sitting in the house all day crying over someone who didn't appreciate you. You don't have to rush into a relationship but you can go out and have a good time life goes on
KHRISTEENAH right. Tamar is all about making an ex jealous until she meets a guy one day who's only using her to make his ex jealous 👀
i agree with tamera and jeanie, it's better to get back in the game when your good and ready.
tamar is thinking like a man, you don't need to always front and we all know how men get over a break up
I love Loni's hair. Sooooo pretty.
her hair is not cute and her makeup is basic.
SheGoesBy Ebi Just like your comment. Not cute and VERY basic.
Last season they were all talking over Tamera and this season their all cutting off Jeanie. I love this show and all the personalities but this whole cutting each other off is not a good look for a group of grown ass women.
Lol the do the same thing at the view but at least they can get a word in. Jeannie doesn't even get a chance to breathe like come on? But she had to be more aggressive if she wants to keep this job!!
Brooklyn Clarke I agree but she shouldn't have to yell just to get her point across. But I guess that's why one reason why they can't hear her because their all loud. I also don't think it's intentional thing that they do. They learn sooner or later.
Danielle A. lol yeah they need to learn conversation skills but the main loud mouths Tamar, Loni and Adrienne need to learn to let the other 2 finish speaking. If you notice Jeannie and Tamera always let them finish but they cut them off as soon as they disagree with what they have to say.
Multidating maybe what you might want when you're young and just having fun. But if you are pretty serious about relationships, like me, I don't think it's a nice thing to do. Whatever it is, you decided to consider that man/woman a part of your life. The least you can do is show some respect to that relationship.
Girl you can't be 35 dating one person at a time especially if u want to get married.life isn't that long you don't have that kind of time
victoria hale Well I don't care if I'm 35 or 45, I want to be married to someone I can trust. If I want to find someone who I can trust, they should be able to trust me. Like I said, it is different for everybody. You do whatever fits for you.
LOLOL, obviouslslyyyyyy when you find The One you drop ALLL the other dudes and focus on him. That's why you multidate, to find The One faster. Geez.
Jeannie's outfit is on point and I agree with her on this one.
I love them all. Tamar is crazy and hilarious. Adrienne is so cute and sweet and funny. Jeannie is adorable, Tamera is so soft spoken and kind & Loni is funnyyyy 😂 perfect mix
multi dating just cause messy situations I dont understand how you can get to know someone when your attention is divided between multiple ppl...dating one is hard enough why the hell would you want to date multiple ppl,my schedule is too busy for that
exactly! what i hate the most tho is they are calling it that in my opinion they really shouldn't. dating rather from the past or 2016 should still mean dating one person and that person only.
jay_rael if your schedule is that booked just date one that’s all lol
Honesty is key. That's all it takes. I'm with A, just be honest from the beginning so it's no games being played and its fair all around.
Kat Aus I’m so with that concept
Team Jeannie and Tamera. Unless your going to be up front and honest like Adrienne said I AM NOT YOUR REBOUND. If you're not over your ex don't drag me into your mess and start using me. The best revenge is showing you can do bad all by yourself .
I'm too platonic for multi-dating. I like to just date one person
preach ladies... All of the ladies are right, from their point of view
I agree with tamera and Jeanie
I love Tamar but why did she always speak like she knows best? She needs to understand and value other people's options. I think Jeannie has a point. Also what is wrong with some me time being single?
Meant to put opinions
lol let jennie talk tamar dang... i love them poor jennie she get her point across the best way she can
I agree. I feel bad for Jennie. when she talks Tamar comes in and taking over lol. I love Tamar but let Jeannie Mai talk. love them all.
I agree with the compromise. You can do what you want as long as ur honest with them and urself
I agree with Jeannie and Tamera. Be ok with yourself first. Don't go around using and hurting people to feel better about yourself. It's unfair, and in that way, you're becoming just like the person that hurt you!!
There is nothing worse than someone leading you onto thinking that you mean so much to them just to find out that you've been taking second place or lower until somebody better leaves their life. I personally don't have it in me to ever multi-date. Also I don't have the time and energy to waste it on making my ex's jealous! Once they're done, they're canceled for life, no contact again whatsoever!
I used 2 believe that another man (aka the rebound) would make me get over my ex quicker (& to each his/her own), but now I think that you should allow yourself to heal or just focus on yourself & have fun... be single for a while & when you have the right connection w/ some1, then you try it again.
"you gotta protect your heart" "date him, even if he's not the one"
Wise advice is to Love you, respect you and that's how you are able to
show and give the same to others.
I agree with Tamar. It may seem childish , but its the best way to keep your confidence up and to keep you from sulking . Break ups sucks so the best thing to do is to get out and meet people. NOT stay in the house. You don't have to "date " another guy or be serious , but have some fun ( have a one night stand maybe) , its actually refreshing.
Maya c something tells me you’ve done this before lol
Getting with a new guy if you haven't got over the first just makes situations more messy. You have a new situation to deal with u
I agree with both, Tamar and Jeanie. But just the fact that Tamar was just smashing on Jeanie's thought of mind wasn't good. Every one works in their own way. I think when I was younger, I thought more like Tamar but as I grew up and became a woman, I thought more like Jeanie in this situation.Overall though, Adrienne, got it right here!
Joy Flores totally right,if you upfront and honest in the beginning everything will be just fine,it’s way too work to be lying and scheming
I agree with Jeannie and Tamera
I agree with Tamar, if that guy is out there having fun like you never even existed to them why do you have to be at home crying over it? You can go have fun too just don't rush into a relationship.
I am in my twenty. And there are plenty of us young people of the social media generation who stills date the "old-fashion" way.
Love how Adrienne handled the contrasting ideas between Tamar and Jeannie. Very mature and honest.
I am with Tamar on this one! That is the way that I ALWAYS handle it. I do, however, give consideration not to lead a guy on.
Tamar's hair finally looks good.
Do you all remember when you used to double Dutch back in the day and that moment when you'd wait for the perfect time to jump in but you'd have a false start and decide to go back to your starting point and try again? Well that's how poor Jeannie is during the conversations. She's just trying to jump in the rope but no one is letting her get a turn. Once again I saw thought bubbles that read:shut up Meg! Poor Jeannie
Honestly I think loud mouth Tamar needs to tune down and Loni with her condescending jokes to Tamera need to stop it's so corny. Loni is trying to portray this big confident woman I don't need a man role...does that get tiring? I understand she doesn't want kids but don't you eventually want a partner? This must be a fake persona for the show.
Honestly I think loud mouth Tamar needs to tune down and Loni with her condescending jokes to Tamera need to stop it's so carry. Loni is trying to portray this big confident woman I don't need a man role...does that get tiring? I understand she doesn't want kids but don't you eventually want a partner? This must be a fake persona for the show.
Brooklyn Clarke YESSS!! I was just talking to my friend about that the other day. Loni plays that stereotypical bacon eating big black woman who don't need a man...BS! And I'm sorry, but I don't even believe she's been dating all the people she says she's been dating. I've come across people like her who lie about their relationships to try and keep up with everyone else. It's sad really. But if she's not lying, I apologize lol
paigea92 Like I understand the show needs comedic relief to keep it fun and light but EVERY episode its "I hate kids, I don't need a man, us fluffy girls need to stick together". Reminds me of Monique back in the day when she would bash skinny/slim girls and LOOK at Monique now she lost all that flubber and is at a healthy size. It was all just a damn gimmick.
Brooklyn Clarke Facts!!
Thank you Tamera! I would never use a man just to get over the past one.
I'm with Tamar when she said she wouldn't lay around and pick herself apart because someone didn't see the value in her. I don't have time for that, she's right someone else is going to see it eventually. Just move on! It's all you can do!
Tamar shouldn't have cut off Jeanie b/c she was making a valid point- if you date someone new and then they end up falling for you while you know they're just your rebound then it's not fair for the new guy/girl. I wouldn't want to just serve as a placeholder as someone's girl, while they're not even that into me. Call me when you're ready to really like/love me, okay?!
jeanne is absolutely right- u shouldnt f with people'e emotions. if you do you're ruthless and you should go to ...
I got my heart broken badly about a year ago and even though I took a break to try and mend myself, I was never able to get over that person until I met someone else and became completely infatuated. It's true, sometimes that hurt or void a person leaves needs to be replaced by something else, it could be a person or a hobby, a career choice, a move, etc.
I agree with Tamar at some points. I'm not about to be sulking around at home, crying, eating ice cream, and watching Waiting to Exhale for the millionth time while my ex is out popping bottles and getting his life. Take a moment and let it out, brush it off, find a new man or yourself as Tamera said and get over it.
This is only ONE example of why Tamar's firing should not have been a shock to anyone. Her advice was HORRIBLE! Selfish and childish playing with somebody's emotions while you figure yours out is noting but a surefire recipe for disaster.
Correction: nothing. Lol
Becky Thomas yesssss... tamar cause problems with young girls watching if they follow her ignorant advice...
Becky Thomas But even in the audience you could see how many people fervently agreed with her. It may not be pc, but its the honestly what a lot of people do. I really wouldnt want to watch tamera give her holier than thou opinion all day long. I liked the diversity tbh
lool Adrianne and Loni agreed though? I know a lot of people who have dated to get over someone and eventually ended up falling in love so it can work
I can sort of see what Tamar is saying, but Jeannie is right. That's not fair to the guy. Plus, how would you feel if it were the other way around and the guy you like is using that same tactic do get over his ex or make his ex jealous? Is that fair? I don't understand why you have to jump into another relationship just to make your ex feel worse/ They're your ex for a reason, who cares what he/she thinks? If you work on yourself first, you'll be strong a more mature to handle whatever comes your way, including your ex.
Secondly, I LOVE Tamar, but that is incredibly stupid. You never take advice on how to make millions from someone who is drowning in debt. It's basic basic *basic* wisdom.
And if you just got hurt by someone who "failed to see your value", where is the sense in jumping straight into a position where you could be guilty of the same?!
YES!!! how about getting a hobby/furthering yourself/maintaining your dignity and self-respect, instead of bouncing around men?
+Robyn Brie Seriously nobody who has been hurt think like that , Tamar was so right point blank and the period.
Phronesis7 another very insightful point!!!!
I so agree with you Tamera. I am 29 years old and have always been an old school dater, Always did it that way and always will.
+Taryn Wilkinson I'm 35 and I'm also old school.
Great points Jeannie and Tamera!
i agree with Adrienne, it helps to have a rebound but let that person know you're not looking for a serious relationship just yet so they know not to get too attached
i agree with Jeannie like aint nobody out trying to waste people time just because they hurt
See, I think the problem with "Monkey bar dating" is that a lot of the pain and difficulty of breaking up/discontinuing to see someone is that you are used to getting a certain amount of attention from that person and when that ends, its a big adjustment. So what you do when you multi date or monkey bar date is instead of figuring out how to be okay with yourself even though you don't get that kind of attention from others, you find someone else to fill that void of attention the other person left. I think its so crucial, especially for us women because we're typically more emotionally dependent on others, that we figure out how to be single (and when I say single, I mean totally and completely independent. Only getting affection and attention ourselves and from God and not a man) and confident in ourselves. I think the more time you spend between relationships working on bouncing back to depending on yourself, the easier it gets and the more independent and whole you are when the right person comes along that you will be with for the long term.
Tamar be talking like she is getting ready to leave Vince, but that's none of my business. Ooop.
Tamar talk like she been down that road one too many times tbh
oh no why you say that.....what happen?
I really dont think she gone lose that money adversetoconverse she crazy but I dont think she is that crazy. Vince is the whole reason why she is relevant now. Vince is a producer on BFV Tamar and Vince and has a part in this show.
Or he about to leave her
yea...u never know i guess. Well she didnt sign a pre-nup so she will come out well, itf it happens.
Tamera is the most classy one that girls should look up to.. Tamar is very insecure and it shows so much
Please all heifers have some insecurity.
STFU Tamera is actually getting outside of her comfort zone because of the girls you need to stop hating they all have insecurities even Tamera OLD school dating for everyone so have several seats in the Yankee Stadium thank hun , you're dismissed.
I agree with Tamar and Loni on this because in today’s world dating is harsh and like Tamar said I’m not going to be the one sad and scrolling through old photos while u out living your best life bc I put my ALL into someone ...that person has to give u a reason to COMPLETELY close all your other options
The problem with what Tamar is saying is that you don't mend or heal yourself. You postpone a breakdown from not taking care of yourself. Its good to date but doing it when you aren't ready and only doing it for the other person to get jealous and not for you only hurts you in the end.
Nicely put Adrienne!! Love, love, love
Love when they have discussions like this. And their makeup is anyways on fleeekk!!
I m Asian , and I love this show even I cannot watch it fm Japan , but only fm RUclips. Thanks for sharing out! However, would you guys pls let JEANNIE talk ? She has some words to say , and like others
If you are heartbroken and shattered from your previous relationship... give yourself the time to heal first... make your healing process a priority
Jeannie’s point of view is obviously the unpopular one but is also the realest. Guys the last thing you wanna do when you get out of a relationship is text, call, meet up or even be with anyone else. If you’re still doing that and you’re 25 and over…you haven’t matured yet. Let alone go front on social media about the fact that you’re hanging out or having “fun” with someone else…because we all know that only lasts us a couple of hours and then you get home, remember that you’re still hurt because is only normal, and then start crying. So what’s the point on dating right after a breakup ? I’ve been there so many times and that’s actually the worst thing you can do. The best thing you can do is unfollow them from everywhere and act like you could care less about what they’re doing and FOCUS 100% on YOU!!! Until you finally move on…trust me is not worth it 😎
I found the “monkey bars” analogy amusing, but I don’t agree with it. Of course it doesn’t feel good to see an ex moving on as if the relationship didn’t mean anything, and no you shouldn’t sit around and wallow in your misery. But you also shouldn't go out and grab someone to aide you in pretending to not be affected by the breakup and/or make your ex jealous. Chill with your friends. Spend time with your family. Have a date night with your damn self. Work on YOU. Why not learn to let go and land on your feet? Because another thing I know about monkey bars: they don’t go on forever. And if you reach the end and can’t let go of the last monkey bar without having another one to grab onto, you’re in trouble. #TeamOldSchool!
I see comments saying that it's selfish and unclassy to date multiple guys. What about the 99% of males who talk to 4-5 different girls?! There should be no problem with us females to multi-date. END OF DISCUSSION
It took me about 2 years to get over my first love and I wasn't really a girl people would call up to go on a date with so I just accepted not going out and then I met my current man and fell hard once we were together for a bit because I finally was over my ex. Now I have been with my man now for going on 3 years. He came at the pefecf time. I was finally getting over my first love and before I got too lonely and use to it Alex came into my life. But I never went and played around, I just lived my life the way I did, even if it was just chilling alone for a few years.
Multi Dating is thoroughly essential as long as you’re not using it as a way to heal! Multi Dating is effective when you’re whole & merely just figuring out what you want! Playing with someone’s feelings is dangerous! If you choose to involve with another being while trying to get over another, lay out all it is & will never be! An understanding is powerful!
P.S. Tamar! You can heal without picking yourself apart! Accountability is important!
if your hurting thats when family or friends should be by your side helping you not to go out hurting other people hearts thats bad Karma
I am always agreeing with tamera and jeeny
I believe in giving yourself time to heal but it is indeed true getting over and old one is easier when you get a new one
lol I always thought that but it's not true and maybe that's just me. so i ended up just taking a break for a while from dudes and did my own thing with friends.
I agree w Jeanie n Tamera u dont have to be forever desperate to find a bf/gf, and dating multiple people at the same time is wrong on so many level unless they all know what u r doing. and dont come over and cry a river when ur man cheats on u, he was just multi dating just like u.
I mean if you want to go date other people to get over someone go for it whatever helps you cope, just as long as you don’t hurt the other person in the process, because nowadays people wanna date to find the “one” not to just casually date
As far as the whole multi-dating concept goes, my grandmother actually did a slight variation of it in her youth. She dated 3 different guys at the same time, my grandfather and 2 other guys. She claims that the men involved didn't know about each other and she had a set day for dates with each guy. Obviously, the other 2 eventually fell by the wayside and she stuck with my grandfather for over 50 years
YAAAAAAAAAAAS TAMAR! I'm not sitting at home wrecking my brain either because he couldn't see how fabulous I am. On to the next one but with my guard UP.
loni's eyeshadow color is on point, especially paired with her hair color
Man I feel bad for Jeannie she can't even get a word in without someone cutting her off.
Anytime you try to rush and rebound after a breakup, you end up picking the wrong person and usually you're miserable with this new person because you don't really like them. Then when they don't measure up to your ex you feel even worse and miss him/her 10x more
yeah, she is right... I am sick of having my hurt broken all the time. being at home will make me more depressed
I don’t agree. I don’t believe in opening one door until the other is closed but I will admit, It’s a very lonely and painful process. if I dated someone new and my liking for him doesn’t outweigh the feelings I had for the previous guy, i suffer more because then I think about them the entire time . It just doesn’t fulfill me. Meanwhile, the guy who hurt me is in love & moved on quickly and I’m stuck picking up the pieces.
Thee Best advice ever. Multi-date
Tamera is my everything of a woman desire, a woman with this type quality is hard to found now a days God bless you
I agree with Tamar; I guess I'm alone on this one.
I agree too!!
Love me some Tamar.
I agree with her I was like that then I had to get that. inset s her just described.
I agreee 100 with Tamar
all of them have some good points. I don`t like the making your ex jealous part, but he will definitely realize what he has lost! I appreciate Tamera and and Jeanie`s point re: the healing aspect. But when you`er hurt you just want to get rid of it ..not saying one should jump into something right after a break up..but u want to get out the house and have fun with your girlfriends ..if a guy checking you.. let him know you`re not looking for spouse right now you just want to let your hair down.. Heartbreaks hurt like hell but are survivable!
Yes Sir! Work on yourself first! the right person will come along when he/she is supposed to come along. No need to make anyone jealous what are you 12? Really!!!
When you are mature enough to be in a serious relationship mind games wont be necessary. 100% agree with Tamera and Jeannie!
If you act like a lady be expected to be treated like one but don't act the opposite and be expected to be treated as a lady.
They all have a good point but I agree more with Tamera and Jeannie.
I love Jeannie 😍 she always has some words of wisdom