Its funny how its considered cool. In my state, a sentence isn't complete without it:( I didn't used to speak that way and now i cant seem to stop, this will definitely curb that!
I only say like when referring something near or similar to what I was saying with example because I can find the right term to put in the sentence but I don't usually use that, only when I can't find the right term to use.
Here are the tips Pao: (1) Get comfortable with silence; (2) Tape yourself; (3) REPLACE FILLER WORDS WITH "PERIOD" OR "PAUSE" (I suggest doing this in your head from the start); (4) Stop and take a breath; (5) Make a list of the filler words you use most often; (6) The "uh" bell (get someone to ring a bell every time you use a filler word); (7) Chunk your information (break your speech into ideas rather than words, once you finish an idea you should know what the next concept you want to get across is); (8) Make eye contact; (9) Take a deep breath and calm down; (10) Keep your hands out of your pockets; (11) Keep your sentences short; (12) PREPARE, prepare, and then prepare some more; (13) You are your own worst critic (but not if you don't even realise you use an inordinate number of filler words).
Also, try say instead of SORRY, THANK YOU. Change your sentences from negative to positive. Ex. “”Sorry, I am late”, say, “Thank you for patiently waiting for me” :)
I was telling my best friend today about a young lady I know. She uses "like" a lot. He went on to inform me that I say "you know" as much. I had no idea.
I can’t stop saying “ya know.” I have been fortunate to do well in my career now after a lot of challenges, but this remains a major downfall for me. Love the article and feel more confident about how I can overcome this. Thank you!!
I have been trying to avoid doing it for years, and it's hard. It's infectious, and when you hear a lot of people doing it, you may find yourself doing it without even thinking about it especially if you heard it all your life as a child. It's cultural and habitual. What's more, many may think it odd or 'stupid' anyway to be concerned about it so much.
you're right--it's definitely cultural. I've noticed that Irish people "EM" instead of UM. And I'm sure there's tons of other variances in different cultures/languages.
Thanks you for posing this. I don't mind hearing a young person using "like" or "you know", but it is creeping into public radio broadcasting and is particularly irritating. I have also become aware of the very fast speech rate of younger people, who seem to stumble over words as their speech rate exceeds their random access. A false egalitarianism has persuaded many educators that grammar and clear expression are products of archaic elitism, which is just plain ridiculous. Language is one of the greatest of human gifts and the ability to express ideas with clarity a thing to be valued.
The public radio issue is THE REASON I'm here. On 1A today, Jenn White interviewed econ professor Ernie Tedeschi, and the ONLY takeaway for me was the # of times Ernie said "YOU KNOW" during the convo. (I stopped counting at 50.) It's such a shame, bc he's obviously someone from whom I could learn a LOT...but all I heard today was YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW. I'm going to send him an empathetic/NON-judgy email along with the link to this vid.
@@IIGeminiGemII How can a learnered professor fall prey to this repetitive use of fill words? The late George Negus, Geraldine Doogue, Margaret Throsby and Caroline Jones were or are exponents of good, concise Australian English. We may come to miss the ABC of our youth as the airwaves become saturated with anti-elitist pretenders.
I tend to use “you know” or “see”. A word I find overused is the word “so”, especially when answering a question. It seems many people will begin their answer with the word “so”. Pay attention to someone being interviewed or answering a question at a presentation, they most often will begin by saying “so, . . .” What’s your thoughts on this?
What's the best way to overcome that? The only technique that I think could prevent that would be repeating the question slowly so you have time to think.
It’s a filler word in the same way. Using “so” is preventing silence while thinking of the response. Embrace the pause, take a breath - that will make you look serious before answering the question!
I recently recorded a Bible study that I was teaching and , um, it was horrible. I couldn't even finish listening to it. I get a second chance this weekend and will be definitely be embracing the pause. Thank you for the video.
Caught myself using "I mean" quite a lot, which I guess is similar to "like." Got an interview coming up. In an effort to silence "um," having it front and center in my minds eye, my efforts to avoid it slowed me down, and made me think a little more about what I was saying, something of a gatekeeper for dialogue that would other wise just come pouring out without much thought at all!
I noticed when I was about 14 I said "you know" a lot and luckily at that age I found it very easy to make a conscious effort to stop saying it. However when I got older I found I was using "like" quite a lot, not anywhere as much as I said "you know" when I was younger, but enough for it to be noticeable. I've gotten much better at not saying "like" but I found when I was older it was a much more difficult habit to kick.
Thanks for the video! I noticed I use quite a few filler words when I do live videos. Keeping the message brief has helped me the most. It makes it easier to narrow down and practice what I really want to say.
I have never, used many "Um's" or other filler words too much. However, there's a RUclipsr who gives great reviews of television and new films. During the pandemic, and out of boredom. I counted 91 UM'S in his review and in another review he had over 100 ums. It made me more aware, of how many times I use any type of word fillers.
My struggle is using the word “like”. I noticed it when my five year old started picking it up and saying “like” a lot. So now I correct him and make him restart the sentence and I try to be conscience of when I use it!
It’s so insane that you can be conscious of saying filler words so often, but have a hard time stopping yourself. Like kills me in conversations as well. I really just try to slow down my speech and throughly think about what I’m going to say before it comes out of my mouth
I catch myself saying like too much and annoy myself, but then I get in my head too much and don’t articulate my point well. I definitely notice that my speech is almost coming out too fast so I’ve tried slowing down what I’m saying.
@@maritzanavarrete5043 silence and stopping to breath, at first I felt weird but people actually didn't even notice what was I doing and over time ( now for instance) there are some filler words that I don't use at all anymore
A couple of months ago I was practicing not using “um, like”and etc before an audit at my job. We were practicing weeks before the audit, when I didn’t know what to say I stayed silent/paused and my coworkers were saying how it was awkward that I was doing that and bad. I was like what do you want me to say? Um Like um um um. Shit, you can never win with some people.
I love this video. Right now the excessive use of "I mean" is driving me crazy, especially when it comes from well educated people who write for a living. Thanks for the great tips.
Um, like, you know, and literally are my top 4. Need to eliminate these to sound more confident and communicate better with future patients and colleagues.
There are so many ZOOM presentations now, and often with people not used to speaking publicly. How do you kindly let someone know that they are using filler words to distraction?
Today, I was listening to CBC Radio, to Jeanne Beker interviewed by Matt Galloway on the Current. She used filler words, "um" and "you know" a few times.
I'm not a guy, but this was very helpful for me. Thanks! I had an English teacher in highschool that said "um" so frequently that several of us would make a tally mark every time he said it to see how many times he said it in a class period. It was very distracting.
i have been talked over and interrupted so many times that i have been conditioned to use filler words so no one starts talking during the silence in between
This is a great video - one I’ll be sharing with my staff. They are awesome professionals and the filler words are probably the biggest trouble spot during our presentations. Thanks for the concrete, actionable tips.
Good tips but one you haven't covered. I just discovered - from a transcription of a Zoom call I was on with half a dozen engaged, fast-talking committee members - that I was using "you know" all the time. (And it annoys me when others do it.) But if I paused instead, others would definitely have interrupted. How to deal with group conversations like that?
I use "you know" as a way of acknowledging the listeners understanding of the subject & not trying to come across as "I'm smarter than you". I use it as a sign of respect but I definitely use it too much and I didn't even realise it until it was pointed out & I watched a training video that I presented 🤭
My family plays a really fun game on long boring road trips, you get a random topic (cars, global worming, Africa, Bluey etc) and have to talk on that topic for 1-2 minutes without saying "um" or "ur" It gets really fun watching people say "um" then try to pretend they were just going to say "umbrella" 😂
I found this very helpful. Especially with the period/pause and 3 seconds pause. I listen to my VMs and noticed how much mmms I use. I had no idea before then. I also notice that I do it more when I’m in my head and rushing to get the words out before forgetting with my ADHD.
Practice, practice, practice speaking in front of people. Look for reasons and opportunities to speak in front of multiple people at a time, starting with friends and family and then broadening out. Keep in mind that EVERYBODY and I mean EVERYBODY is just a person, no bigger or better than you. In terms of filler words what's helped me (and I was a TERRIBLE offender for years) is to try to think concisely, directly and in whole sentences. Thinking and talking at the same time almost guarantees that you'll use filler words. Try not to use qualifiers too much either even if you want to show subtlety when making a point. Large crowds especially need clear, simple, memorable messages. Also keep in mind that many people have a short attention span so trying to fill in points at length during conversation is often counterproductive anyway and DEFINITELY leads to many pauses and filler words as you're trying to keep the floor.
Sooooo... I, um, thought this video was, er, so... it was really helpful in my starting of my er, journey, and progress towards not using 'and' 'errr' 'so' as constant and annoying filler words!
Oh my lord , I got into sales recently and have been reviewing my calls . I've been saying um 2 million times and realizing this is probably not serving me . thanks for this video !!!!!
I'm constantly saying 'You know'. I had eliminated it but now doing more online videos I noticed it is back. When doing a podcast if I pause and don't say anything the other guests butt in and I don't get to finish my point so I think it is unconscious but can't stop it
The weather guy on my local TV station says "Y'know" in every talk break. I wish I could call him up and tell him "If I knew, I wouldn't need you, and then you would be out of a job". Another good technique I do to eliminate filler words in free-form speech is to imagine the ideas streaming across my field of view like a "crawl" on a TV screen. Then I just read it with my mind's eye. I do a radio show on which I talk about the music in a free-form style, relating artist information and chart positions. Some information is written down in front of me, but the ad-lib is conversational sounding but devoid of um, like, and you know. Listeners react favorably.
Mine are “so” and “um.” Drives me crazy all the time to hear myself doing it. I try to consciously change it, but it’s very difficult. Going to try to say “pause” in my head instead.
I do a lot of accents, dialects and “stereotype voices” for comedic purposes and I’ve (and my English teacher unfortunately) found myself saying “like” waaay too much which I REALLY hate since I’m usually able to construct nice well said sentences that have a lot of ethos, but it just loses that when I keep saying like after like every word like y’know?
I would refuse to interview anyone who uses any of these filler words if I was a radio or TV host. I frequently have to change the station regardless of my interest in the subject matter due to this obnoxious habit some people have.
I will "uhh" quite often but I recognize it so often times I close my eyes and take a second to collect what I'm saying slowly and get it out in a coherent way. Although that can slip into another problem I have where I drag out some words a little but that's less pervasive than "uhh"
Very good. Good concepts well presented.Get comfortable with silence. The most powerful thing is to stop speaking. Wait. It makes the audience pay attention.
I can't stop doing it- I could litterally have everything planned but the thing is when I'm talking with people who I don't know very well or sometimes even people I know very well I get anxiety so I just kindof you know like blank out
People saying "you know" is one of my biggest pet peeves. I didnt realize though thay it was a filler word though. It always bothered me because I found it to be presumptuous and didnt like being told what I know haha
Looking back to my school.years in the Forties, "like" was a common word. indicating a speaker who was stupid. iIt hasd always been the marker of a stupid speaker. "You know" ("yunno") has taken.over in recent times. It is often preceded by "Uh" and followed by kinda (kind.of). Yunno is a marker that may mean "You agree" or more likely "I cant remember what I'm talking about'. The early Hiphop dialect expanded Yunno to "You know what I'm saying?" However uttered, this virus "yunno" is a mark of stupidity. That it can be heard in almost every news report and interview bodes sadly for the time to come. Right? Yunno what I'm saying? Kinda?
My biggest filler words are, "So", "Um", "Like" and I think I abuse words of ordinality, like "Firstly", "Secondly", "Finally", "Lastly", etc. Thanks for the tips!
My problem is I say “you know” after every damn sentence and I catch myself doing it and I relize I’m probably annoying the hell out of my friends and family cause every time I say “you know” I say it to get a response back like “right” or “yeah” but I always get a silent response
I think I get into the habit during conversation. During the pause for thought, I worry (with justification) that I will get interrupted and lose my train of thought when someone thinks I'm done and jumps in. The "ummmm" is a way of saying "I'm not done." I guess it depends a little on who you hang out with. The problem comes in when you are monologuing. The "ummmm" is no longer needed but is habit.
Lmao he's funny and handsome 🤣😂 how he shouted "PERIOD" otp. This is so helpful though. I did a podcast and felt so dumb with my "ums" and "you knows." I was editing for an hour 😩😭
Also try instead of um I know you can say I know and when you talk don't say um say like I know two plus two is four because Phillie words are sentences that are phrases
Quit swearing. This guy thoroughly and successfully communicated everything he had to say without once dropping an f bomb or some other course language. When you were a child cursing was impressionable, adults who do not are impressionable.
Thank you for this video I really appreciate it I am currently trying to learn how to not say the word init anymore as people around me are getting very angry with me and my opinions have stopped mattering recently so this video has helped me come through to stop my habit of using this word. I appreciate it very much thank you
i have terrible adhd and i talk so fast that filler words just help me talk smoother but they make what i’m saying sound dumb when i’m actually pretty smart
This was so helpful, thank you. I've noticed I say "Um" a lot in my videos and wanting to change that. Let's see how much of an improvement your techniques make :)
What about people that say whole sentences ALL THE TIME? I have a friend that says, " You know what I'm saying?" But all as together as one word like, "Ynawmsayin?'" and also he says, "Nawmean?". It drives me absolutely insane...
I wasn't very aware of the number of times I say "you know" in my videos. I even got a comment on it. Now I am editing my next video on a personal development course review and I even got annoyed by it.
I'm gonna be honest most of these tips are usually pretty good advice but when google recommended the bit to me at 6:11 where the advice is think more in advance about what you wanna say and the next bit about making eye contact more I just found it really funny because those are things explicitly harder for my adhd
This has helped me stop using the word “like” so much because I’m a teenager in Southern California where everyone says “like” every 10 seconds lmao
Its funny how its considered cool. In my state, a sentence isn't complete without it:( I didn't used to speak that way and now i cant seem to stop, this will definitely curb that!
I only say like when referring something near or similar to what I was saying with example because I can find the right term to put in the sentence but I don't usually use that, only when I can't find the right term to use.
i could not handle it...
Every 2 secs
way more often than 10 seconds = /
I CAN'T STOP SAYING BRUH
True
Stop fucking saying it.
Bruh
same bruh
Facts bruh
Here are the tips Pao:
(1) Get comfortable with silence;
(2) Tape yourself;
(3) REPLACE FILLER WORDS WITH "PERIOD" OR "PAUSE" (I suggest doing this in your head from the start);
(4) Stop and take a breath;
(5) Make a list of the filler words you use most often;
(6) The "uh" bell (get someone to ring a bell every time you use a filler word);
(7) Chunk your information (break your speech into ideas rather than words, once you finish an idea you should know what the next concept you want to get across is);
(8) Make eye contact;
(9) Take a deep breath and calm down;
(10) Keep your hands out of your pockets;
(11) Keep your sentences short;
(12) PREPARE, prepare, and then prepare some more;
(13) You are your own worst critic (but not if you don't even realise you use an inordinate number of filler words).
@@susiepilled stahp lol
That was kind of you, thanks!
i do often use maybe rather than like, and you know
Also, try say instead of SORRY, THANK YOU. Change your sentences from negative to positive. Ex. “”Sorry, I am late”, say, “Thank you for patiently waiting for me” :)
Interesting! that's a good way to keep it positive. I like it!
Thank you I broke your favorite plate
;(
TheLosersaccount , Thank you for not being mad that I broke your favorite plate.
@@MariyaLoveyah ok thank you that I got it wrong
TheLosersaccount , thank you for correcting me. ;)
I was telling my best friend today about a young lady I know. She uses "like" a lot. He went on to inform me that I say "you know" as much. I had no idea.
now, you know
I can’t stop saying “ya know.” I have been fortunate to do well in my career now after a lot of challenges, but this remains a major downfall for me. Love the article and feel more confident about how I can overcome this. Thank you!!
Same
he said PERIODT
😭😭
Arige S ok ? 💀
Ricky T 🤩
😭😭
😂 I was not expecting this.
I have been trying to avoid doing it for years, and it's hard. It's infectious, and when you hear a lot of people doing it, you may find yourself doing it without even thinking about it especially if you heard it all your life as a child. It's cultural and habitual. What's more, many may think it odd or 'stupid' anyway to be concerned about it so much.
you're right--it's definitely cultural. I've noticed that Irish people "EM" instead of UM. And I'm sure there's tons of other variances in different cultures/languages.
I sometimes still use it when I think of what I'm going to say
You can avoid that. The technique is that try to lesson yourself while you are talking.
My RUclips recommendations are *roasting* me
Thanks you for posing this. I don't mind hearing a young person using "like" or "you know", but it is creeping into public radio broadcasting and is particularly irritating. I have also become aware of the very fast speech rate of younger people, who seem to stumble over words as their speech rate exceeds their random access. A false egalitarianism has persuaded many educators that grammar and clear expression are products of archaic elitism, which is just plain ridiculous. Language is one of the greatest of human gifts and the ability to express ideas with clarity a thing to be valued.
The public radio issue is THE REASON I'm here. On 1A today, Jenn White interviewed econ professor Ernie Tedeschi, and the ONLY takeaway for me was the # of times Ernie said "YOU KNOW" during the convo. (I stopped counting at 50.)
It's such a shame, bc he's obviously someone from whom I could learn a LOT...but all I heard today was YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW.
I'm going to send him an empathetic/NON-judgy email along with the link to this vid.
@@IIGeminiGemII How can a learnered professor fall prey to this repetitive use of fill words? The late George Negus, Geraldine Doogue, Margaret Throsby and Caroline Jones were or are exponents of good, concise Australian English. We may come to miss the ABC of our youth as the airwaves become saturated with anti-elitist pretenders.
I thought I was the only one who used, "John Stamos," as a filler word. Good to know it is a common condition.
Brov
I have a friend and every sentence contains " you know " I started counting their recurrence and in one phrase he repeated " you know " six times!
Does that mean you say "John Stamos" at the end of a sentence?
@@AzureTank776 haha I know right. That will be very funny to hear someone say that.
@@valerieobrien5521 I have that problem too 😭
I tend to use “you know” or “see”.
A word I find overused is the word “so”, especially when answering a question. It seems many people will begin their answer with the word “so”. Pay attention to someone being interviewed or answering a question at a presentation, they most often will begin by saying “so, . . .” What’s your thoughts on this?
What's the best way to overcome that? The only technique that I think could prevent that would be repeating the question slowly so you have time to think.
It’s a filler word in the same way. Using “so” is preventing silence while thinking of the response. Embrace the pause, take a breath - that will make you look serious before answering the question!
@@cloyphishs1049 Not only is the word 'so' a filler word, 'So' is a summarizing word. It doesn't fit at the beginning of a sentence.
"In other words"
I feel like even confident people being answers with "so". I don't feel like it really detracts from the message in my opinion
I recently recorded a Bible study that I was teaching and , um, it was horrible. I couldn't even finish listening to it. I get a second chance this weekend and will be definitely be embracing the pause. Thank you for the video.
When I did a reading at my grandmothers funeral I made sure I did little pauses and when you do little pauses it slows down your cadence
yes, that's true! Nice work.
Most underrated channel guys. Nice work Mr. Kyle
thanks Varun!
Appreciate you come back to RUclips Kyle! Great video too
I love this video. PERIODT. I'll give these tips a try, thanks!
Periodt Pooh
All of this resonated with me. Thank you for sharing. I didn’t realise using filler words is born of low confidence but I do tend to agree.
Agreed, I get some anxiety or don’t want to say something stupid so I start speaking too quickly which makes the likes flow so easily.
Caught myself using "I mean" quite a lot, which I guess is similar to "like." Got an interview coming up. In an effort to silence "um," having it front and center in my minds eye, my efforts to avoid it slowed me down, and made me think a little more about what I was saying, something of a gatekeeper for dialogue that would other wise just come pouring out without much thought at all!
Tip #2: "record yourself speaking..."
Me, a RUclipsr: _thats... why I'm here_
The Gaming Burglar 😂 same
Me too and I use "you know"alot
Also annoying is the encroaching use of "for me, personally..." in conversations, videos and interviews.
Totally agree!
This was super helpful. I host a podcast called Meet Them Mondays and I was horrified at my UM’s and LIKES. Thank you 🙏🏽
Glad you found it helpful! :-)
Me (while preparing for job interviews): I need to do something about my habit of saying "y'know" and "like" every sentence
Kyle: I got you
I like videos like this. Concrete examples contrast with bad vs good. I hope people would make quality content like this. Thank you!
I noticed when I was about 14 I said "you know" a lot and luckily at that age I found it very easy to make a conscious effort to stop saying it. However when I got older I found I was using "like" quite a lot, not anywhere as much as I said "you know" when I was younger, but enough for it to be noticeable. I've gotten much better at not saying "like" but I found when I was older it was a much more difficult habit to kick.
Those are all the words that i say and i kinda feel annoyed by it
So um.. like i actually need this.. you know.. the video
This idea of using "period " helped me a great deal. Thank you from India!
Thanks for the video! I noticed I use quite a few filler words when I do live videos. Keeping the message brief has helped me the most. It makes it easier to narrow down and practice what I really want to say.
I have never, used many "Um's" or other filler words too much. However, there's a RUclipsr who gives great reviews of television and new films. During the pandemic, and out of boredom. I counted 91 UM'S in his review and in another review he had over 100 ums. It made me more aware, of how many times I use any type of word fillers.
My struggle is using the word “like”. I noticed it when my five year old started picking it up and saying “like” a lot. So now I correct him and make him restart the sentence and I try to be conscience of when I use it!
Good for you! It's a terrible habit, one of my absolute worst pet peeves. I can't even focus on what people who overuse it are saying.
It’s so insane that you can be conscious of saying filler words so often, but have a hard time stopping yourself. Like kills me in conversations as well. I really just try to slow down my speech and throughly think about what I’m going to say before it comes out of my mouth
I catch myself saying like too much and annoy myself, but then I get in my head too much and don’t articulate my point well. I definitely notice that my speech is almost coming out too fast so I’ve tried slowing down what I’m saying.
I watched this video weeks ago and I come back today to say THANK YOU! IT WORKED! I'M SO HAPPY! THANK YOU AGAIN!
What worked the best?
@@maritzanavarrete5043 silence and stopping to breath, at first I felt weird but people actually didn't even notice what was I doing and over time ( now for instance) there are some filler words that I don't use at all anymore
Thank you for your reply. This is day one for me.
@@maritzanavarrete5043 Good luck !!!
A couple of months ago I was practicing not using “um, like”and etc before an audit at my job. We were practicing weeks before the audit, when I didn’t know what to say I stayed silent/paused and my coworkers were saying how it was awkward that I was doing that and bad. I was like what do you want me to say? Um Like um um um. Shit, you can never win with some people.
I love this video. Right now the excessive use of "I mean" is driving me crazy, especially when it comes from well educated people who write for a living.
Thanks for the great tips.
I have idiot colleagues who type these fillers in emails to clients. There's no hope!
Um, like, you know, and literally are my top 4. Need to eliminate these to sound more confident and communicate better with future patients and colleagues.
There are so many ZOOM presentations now, and often with people not used to speaking publicly. How do you kindly let someone know that they are using filler words to distraction?
Today, I was listening to CBC Radio, to Jeanne Beker interviewed by Matt Galloway on the Current. She used filler words, "um" and "you know" a few times.
This was helpful. My speech is often riddled with umms and I can't take hearing them anymore. Thank you gonna work on pausing more frequently.
my science teacher is always telling me that i should stop saying "uh" and "um" so much, i totally agree so i'm finally doing something about it
A science teacher could offer to help with an electric shock device.
@@danielmocsny5066 I kill people who say um a lot
I'm not a guy, but this was very helpful for me. Thanks!
I had an English teacher in highschool that said "um" so frequently that several of us would make a tally mark every time he said it to see how many times he said it in a class period. It was very distracting.
i have been talked over and interrupted so many times that i have been conditioned to use filler words so no one starts talking during the silence in between
I’m guilty of saying “I think “ at the beginning of a sentence.
I'm the same, even if I'm sure of what I'm saying.
I think I’m guilty of that too
@jaehyun lived in america for 4 years ok 4 years guesses:
Uhmm... I sort of enjoyed, you know, the video!
I really like your channel and tips you provide for daily life. I used your video for educational purposes in my school too. Thank you.
you're very welcome, Mariya! I'm glad you found it helpful.
My newest fillers are “that’s the thing” and “funnily enough”. It’s so frustrating because I’m very aware when I’ve used them and get so wound up lol
This is a great video - one I’ll be sharing with my staff. They are awesome professionals and the filler words are probably the biggest trouble spot during our presentations. Thanks for the concrete, actionable tips.
Good tips but one you haven't covered. I just discovered - from a transcription of a Zoom call I was on with half a dozen engaged, fast-talking committee members - that I was using "you know" all the time. (And it annoys me when others do it.) But if I paused instead, others would definitely have interrupted. How to deal with group conversations like that?
I use "you know" as a way of acknowledging the listeners understanding of the subject & not trying to come across as "I'm smarter than you". I use it as a sign of respect but I definitely use it too much and I didn't even realise it until it was pointed out & I watched a training video that I presented 🤭
“Um like you know when they like uhh….”
My family plays a really fun game on long boring road trips, you get a random topic (cars, global worming, Africa, Bluey etc) and have to talk on that topic for 1-2 minutes without saying "um" or "ur"
It gets really fun watching people say "um" then try to pretend they were just going to say "umbrella" 😂
I found this very helpful. Especially with the period/pause and 3 seconds pause. I listen to my VMs and noticed how much mmms I use. I had no idea before then. I also notice that I do it more when I’m in my head and rushing to get the words out before forgetting with my ADHD.
Practice, practice, practice speaking in front of people. Look for reasons and opportunities to speak in front of multiple people at a time, starting with friends and family and then broadening out. Keep in mind that EVERYBODY and I mean EVERYBODY is just a person, no bigger or better than you.
In terms of filler words what's helped me (and I was a TERRIBLE offender for years) is to try to think concisely, directly and in whole sentences. Thinking and talking at the same time almost guarantees that you'll use filler words. Try not to use qualifiers too much either even if you want to show subtlety when making a point. Large crowds especially need clear, simple, memorable messages. Also keep in mind that many people have a short attention span so trying to fill in points at length during conversation is often counterproductive anyway and DEFINITELY leads to many pauses and filler words as you're trying to keep the floor.
Sooooo... I, um, thought this video was, er, so... it was really helpful in my starting of my er, journey, and progress towards not using 'and' 'errr' 'so' as constant and annoying filler words!
Oh my lord , I got into sales recently and have been reviewing my calls . I've been saying um 2 million times and realizing this is probably not serving me . thanks for this video !!!!!
I'm constantly saying 'You know'. I had eliminated it but now doing more online videos I noticed it is back. When doing a podcast if I pause and don't say anything the other guests butt in and I don't get to finish my point so I think it is unconscious but can't stop it
The weather guy on my local TV station says "Y'know" in every talk break. I wish I could call him up and tell him "If I knew, I wouldn't need you, and then you would be out of a job".
Another good technique I do to eliminate filler words in free-form speech is to imagine the ideas streaming across my field of view like a "crawl" on a TV screen. Then I just read it with my mind's eye. I do a radio show on which I talk about the music in a free-form style, relating artist information and chart positions. Some information is written down in front of me, but the ad-lib is conversational sounding but devoid of um, like, and you know. Listeners react favorably.
Mine are “so” and “um.” Drives me crazy all the time to hear myself doing it. I try to consciously change it, but it’s very difficult. Going to try to say “pause” in my head instead.
Need to know for this for my interview
I do a lot of accents, dialects and “stereotype voices” for comedic purposes and I’ve (and my English teacher unfortunately) found myself saying “like” waaay too much which I REALLY hate since I’m usually able to construct nice well said sentences that have a lot of ethos, but it just loses that when I keep saying like after like every word like y’know?
@Max haha thank you. One of my all time favourite game series.
I would refuse to interview anyone who uses any of these filler words if I was a radio or TV host. I frequently have to change the station regardless of my interest in the subject matter due to this obnoxious habit some people have.
I will "uhh" quite often but I recognize it so often times I close my eyes and take a second to collect what I'm saying slowly and get it out in a coherent way. Although that can slip into another problem I have where I drag out some words a little but that's less pervasive than "uhh"
But doesn’t that make you seem slow or mentally retarded
So basically talk like The City Girls "Period" 🤣
Nice....I like that you provided lots of tips. I think anyone can find at least one or two they can work on. Well done. Thanks for sharing. 🙏
Very good. Good concepts well presented.Get comfortable with silence. The most powerful thing is to stop speaking. Wait. It makes the audience pay attention.
Editing my first vlog, becoming aware of the number of 'and um yeah's in my speech - very painful.
I can't stop doing it- I could litterally have everything planned but the thing is when I'm talking with people who I don't know very well or sometimes even people I know very well I get anxiety so I just kindof you know like blank out
but wouldn't saying period and pause just make you replace "um" with those words?
People saying "you know" is one of my biggest pet peeves. I didnt realize though thay it was a filler word though. It always bothered me because I found it to be presumptuous and didnt like being told what I know haha
This video is criminally underwatched
Looking back to my school.years in the Forties,
"like" was a common word. indicating a speaker who was stupid.
iIt hasd always been the marker of a stupid speaker.
"You know" ("yunno") has taken.over in recent times.
It is often preceded by "Uh" and followed by kinda (kind.of).
Yunno is a marker that may mean "You agree"
or more likely "I cant remember what I'm talking about'.
The early Hiphop dialect expanded Yunno to
"You know what I'm saying?"
However uttered, this virus "yunno" is a mark of stupidity.
That it can be heard in almost every news report and interview bodes sadly for the time to come. Right? Yunno what I'm saying? Kinda?
Great tips!
Um, like, uh are my enemies right now.
My biggest filler words are, "So", "Um", "Like" and I think I abuse words of ordinality, like "Firstly", "Secondly", "Finally", "Lastly", etc.
Thanks for the tips!
My problem is I say “you know” after every damn sentence and I catch myself doing it and I relize I’m probably annoying the hell out of my friends and family cause every time I say “you know” I say it to get a response back like “right” or “yeah” but I always get a silent response
Great presentation. I start a conversation with No, or No,No, No. This presentation is very helpful.
I'm trying to stop saying, 'so' and 'um' so much during my new podcast. I sound stupid.. 😂
I think I get into the habit during conversation. During the pause for thought, I worry (with justification) that I will get interrupted and lose my train of thought when someone thinks I'm done and jumps in. The "ummmm" is a way of saying "I'm not done." I guess it depends a little on who you hang out with.
The problem comes in when you are monologuing. The "ummmm" is no longer needed but is habit.
“It’s interesting ...”, I have started being able to stop myself from starting sentences with that
I just realized I've been using filter words when I was doing a RUclips video. Thank you so much for your help
Great content, boss. Thank you for this. You just earned my subscription.
You are a really charismatic man, Kyle. Thanks for another great video of yours!
thanks so much, Natalie!
Lmao he's funny and handsome 🤣😂 how he shouted "PERIOD" otp. This is so helpful though. I did a podcast and felt so dumb with my "ums" and "you knows." I was editing for an hour 😩😭
My first language is spanish and when I do "speakings" in english I can't stop saying "like" and "you know" 😭
@@thisisjamal1 who?
Also try instead of um I know you can say I know and when you talk don't say um say like I know two plus two is four because Phillie words are sentences that are phrases
Quit swearing.
This guy thoroughly and successfully communicated everything he had to say without once dropping an f bomb or some other course language. When you were a child cursing was impressionable, adults who do not are impressionable.
Thank you for this video I really appreciate it I am currently trying to learn how to not say the word init anymore as people around me are getting very angry with me and my opinions have stopped mattering recently so this video has helped me come through to stop my habit of using this word. I appreciate it very much thank you
Thank you so much for this helpful video.
I need to stop saying filling words, I have been using my native language filling words, it makes me sound weird, :(
My daughter uses the word like a lot. How do I tell my daughter without hurting her feelings or not sound condescending?
I am english learner. So speaking is very difficult for me. I always say umm ahh or you know too much. Thanks for this helpfull video
You know
i have terrible adhd and i talk so fast that filler words just help me talk smoother but they make what i’m saying sound dumb when i’m actually pretty smart
This was so helpful, thank you. I've noticed I say "Um" a lot in my videos and wanting to change that. Let's see how much of an improvement your techniques make :)
What about people that say whole sentences ALL THE TIME? I have a friend that says, " You know what I'm saying?" But all as together as one word like, "Ynawmsayin?'" and also he says, "Nawmean?". It drives me absolutely insane...
I wasn't very aware of the number of times I say "you know" in my videos. I even got a comment on it. Now I am editing my next video on a personal development course review and I even got annoyed by it.
This was me just now, I was editing a video and realised “you know” is a filler I used after every sentence 😭😭
I'm gonna be honest most of these tips are usually pretty good advice but when google recommended the bit to me at 6:11 where the advice is think more in advance about what you wanna say and the next bit about making eye contact more I just found it really funny because those are things explicitly harder for my adhd
There is nothing worse than the ubiquitous "you know." I want to scream out, "No, I DONT know!"
Very helpful. Thanks!
I love how "Hodor" made your list of filler words! :D
2024 The word PERIOD is overly used, especially in the younger demographics.