I'm a patient transporter. It is literally my job to push patients around in beds, stretchers, and wheelchairs. 300 lbs is more than many people would be able to move without training. When I started the job, I had to work very hard not to huff and puff pushing that kind of weight by standard wheelchair. I'm much stronger now and we have special wheelchair for XL patients, but in the beginning, pushing 300lbs made me feel like I was going to die. 600 lbs requires at least two patient transporters working together, and is still a big task that exerts a lot of energy. I wouldn't expect anyone to push 600 pounds unassisted, especially over uneven ground. I understand that obesity is a very sensitive subject, and people suffering with it tend to have a difficult time differentiating between the hostility people show them every day for a problem that went out of their control years ago, and genuine acknowledgement of actual physical limits. I always figure that if I was insulted and mistreated as frequently as someone with an obesity problem is, I would also probably be pretty sensitive about the issue, so my heart goes out to the cousin, but there was clearly nothing OP could do.
Thank you for giving your input on this, and being respectful in the process Another thing I’ve been thinking about too is not only would OP have to push Cousin on uneven ground with no help, but also probably in a fancy/layered outfit that would restrict some mobility.
It would definitely be a safety issue potentially for both parties involved. I imagine it would be extremely easy to pull a muscle or fall if you have zero training and probably have never even attempted to push or pull something of that weight.
My husband was in a wheelchair for almost a year before he had his surgery, and this person is definitely NTA. It was really tough to do even mild slopes and sidewalks with him in the wheelchair and he and the wheelchair was about 200lbs. Pushing a 600lb person plus wheelchair over grass... I would get about ten feet before giving up lol
It wouldn't be safe honestly. You hit one small rock and the chair could tip over, and then you'd have to call 911 to get her back up. If they really wanted this cousin to be there, someone could have helped them rent a U-Haul utility trailer to put the scooter into - for $35 you can rent a utility trailer with a ramp.
Even just pushing a wheelchair with a light person in it is very hard, on pavement sp I would say nta. I'm pretty strong but had a hard time pushing my 150lbs friend around on pavement. I can't imagine pushing around someone who is 600lbs that seems impossible ngl
@@kindauncoolhard to imagine that, I have some arthritis and cold intolerance issues that have become frustratingly inhibitive and I often have to remind people that I need certain specific conditions in order to function and I feel so bad about it. I don’t doubt what you’re saying I just genuinely can’t imagine being so hostile about a lack of accommodation that I was uninvited from an event
I saw this on my reddit feed before they made the update, im glad to know that OP didnt have to go through with something no one else was willing to compromise on
One of the sweetest things I've seen online was a gravestone with a cupcake recipe on the back. The wife/mom/grandma died and before her death she asked for the recipe that everyone in the family loved to be engraved on the back of the gravestone so everyone knows how to make it themselves. It just felt so sweet and loving.
A little while ago I found an account online that would make recipes that people put on their gravestones. I don't remember the account name but I think it's such a sweet idea for people to pass on their secret recipes after they die. The way I see it, it's a great way to keep their legacy alive and share it with the world
I bet every time they asked grandma for the recipe, she'd say "Over my dead body" and had the gravestone paid off before her death 😆 And then on the funeral, where was the recipe? Over her dead body
"Hey, you know how your mobility scooters are able to go over grass?" "yeah" "Can I rent one?" "where are you gonna use it?" "Over some grass." "FUCK no"
It’s their equipment they have to maintain and make money on. Most rental companies no matter what type of vehicle you rent will have rules similar to these.
@@benry007 True, but it’s just hilarious they probably didn’t have much context and decided “hm… nope! you can’t use one of our scooters, goodbye, good luck!” or even with the context, they still denied them to even *try* to make it work 😂🥲
The cruise ship story makes me so crazy. I went on a cruise and the FIRST thing they tell you is “DO NOT BE LATE FOR EMBARKATION WE WILL LEAVE YOU.” Like literally. Every time we docked to go ashore, there was a literal hallway of staff reminding us what all-aboard time was, and to make sure we were wearing watches that synced up with the SHIP’S time because not all ports were on the same time zone. It’s so so so stupid to me that these people literally thought a whole ass cruise ship would WAIT for them. Like WHAT.
@@nicjoy4407a little stuck up!?!?? When you blame your 18 year old kid for NOT being able to control a cruise ship for YOUR convenience, that's MUCH more than "a little stuck up!" That's just...bad parenting! One of THE worst things a parent can do is blame a kid for their own mistakes!
@@yeshevishmanpart of me wonders if the parents are maybe just joking about it like, maybe they’ll say “don’t leave us again” in a joking kinda way if the daughter is leaving the room? But most of me knows that anyone who gives a gift with the caveat of that gift being a bunch of other things, some of which include your loyalty and consideration while using said gift, is a jerk. Plus they probably bend the rules all the time, most people with money do. Blaming the daughter takes away from the cognitive dissonance of the notion that you aren’t inherently entitled to special treatment and the world, including your kid who was given a loaded birthday/graduation “gift” you forced her to bring you along for, doesn’t revolve around you. A real graduation/birthday gift would have been a cruise for the daughter and one of her friends. I’m looking in my crystal ball and I’m seeing a future stressful wedding that’s gonna be a real shit show bc of these people paying for it. My advice is, take their money bc they’ll be this way whether or not they paid, their excuses will just be different. Still tho, great problems to have compared to many of the alternatives
I'm wondering if they thought the cruise would wait because a child's parents weren't with them. Obviously, the girl I'd old enough to survive without her parents, but it made me wonder: What if a four year old wandered back to the ship alone... would they wait for the parents?
@@welcome2myhappyworld I don't think staying is a option they physically can do without costing them a shit ton of money, I'm sure that they have some sort of protocol for scenarios like that.
8:12 Time blindness isn't an issue when someone is saying in your face, "Hey we need to go, we need to get to the ship." They were just being entitled. Time blindness would have only come in if they had turned around and said we'll go in a minute when the kid finally gave up and said they were leaving. Then they would be like, "Oh we hadn't realized so much time had passed." But instead they were, "Why didn't you make them wait for us." Putting thr blame on the adult child instead of on their own actions or inactions.
Yeah, this. And time blindness is often a symptom of ADHD. It's not a one-off thing, it's a condition and is distressing. The parents are deliberately ignoring the time warning
Exactly! I hate it when people use time blindness as an excuse for their behaviour. It’s a serious issue and people like this make it seem ridiculous and childish. Edit to clarify: I know this couple didn’t use time blindness as an excuse but I’m speaking generally.
i have adhd and experience time blindness. yea sometimes i'm late for stuff but for really important things i set multiple alarms so even if i get a lil distracted there will be another alarm like oh yea i gotta go yo . time is a freaking mystery to me, i always think things are gonna take less or more time than they actually take, but that is no excuse in this situation
Also, Kelly is a whole ass adult and needed to hear what mom said. Mom would be doing her daughter a disservice by sugar coating that truth. She used her daughter’s own words to deliver a wake up call.
The context is really important. Her mom disagrees with the hierarchy Kelly assumes the world has, but since she won't let go of that perception her mom used that phrasing to let her know she's not on top of the world (entitled) like she thinks she is
Mother sounds like an asshole, not shocked she raised kids who are jealous of each other. Note the framing “then she’s the loser now.” NOW. She just acknowledged that her other daughter was a loser in high school. She called both her kids losers, she used the same language as her daughter who learned it somewhere. You aren’t a loser cos you study and have a small group of friends, you aren’t a loser if don’t do well in school and are social. Mums a loser.
"She was a loser in high school & it isn't fair that she has everything" Kelly is giving off "once a big fish in small pond to big fish drowning in the ocean" energy...
You haven’t ‘pique’ now either. I doubt you will ever ‘pique’. Just a joke, don’t many anything real by it (it’s peaked, not pique😅) Literally minutes ago I spelt “played” as “plaid”, no one is immune.😢
@@kmhkennedyjust to jump in on the fun, you couldn’t ever really “ _many_ anything real by it” anyway. Any way? 🫣Certainly 🏃🏼♀️💨 not 👀🫨 -ANYWAYS- 👀😩😭🧎🏼♀️ 🌊🌋🔥 🌎💥☄️🪂 lol, word nerds gonna word nerd 🫶🏻 Sincerely, A Fellow Pedant
They shouldn't be mad at the kid. They should be grateful that they didn't have to pay for a third plane ticket. That's what he should tell his parents.
as a wheelchair user NTA, i can barely push myself in my chair on uneven surfaces and i am much lighter than the cousin, wheelchairs take a LOT of physical strength to move.
@@truthteller880The stupid thing is they apparently have it in order to help their daughter travel around, but they didn't want to loan it to OP to help their daughter travel
As someone with adhd and pretty bad time blindness if someone tells me “hey we need to leave right now” and I’m not in the middle of doing something (paying for something, finishing getting dresses, putting on shoes, etc.) I go, I don’t just wait and loose track of time (cus I know I will) I just go wherever I need to go when the other person says it’s time to go, I’ve also been on a few cruises and they literally cannot wait for you, cruises and such stick to a super strict schedule that they arent gonna bend for a couple of irresponsible adults
True. That's like a guy saying 'I have no experience with how it is being a woman, but I've seen women on the street. So I got a fair grasp of things like periods etc imo.'
I am so glad the bride invited that girl because she didn’t deserve that level of disrespect. She should feel like at least someone cares about her and wants her there. That man is messing everything up and he’s going to die alone and it’s going to be no one‘s fault but his own.
For those wondering, he did share the recipe to the cake in the comments of the reddit post!! I'm definitely gonna try making it this next week, and leave a comment thanking him for sharing it.
I'm useless at baking, I really struggle with following directions and baking doesn't forgive skipping steps and coming back to them after. I still hunted down that recipe and I'm going to attempt it when I feel brave
just quickly on the first one, as a disabled person (not obese, just a cripple), i would be SO embarrassed if someone was asked to go OUT OF STATE to essentially babysit me. and the whole "unacceptable venue" thing is really fucking simple. you, as a guest, do not matter nearly as much as the bride and groom. the one time id say otherwise is if you are INSANELY close to the people getting married, then its like ok, maybe they should have been a little more considerate. regardless, op's cousin is a massive AH for many reasons.
Yes I agree. If the attendee is in the immediate family of the Bride or the groom and they still pick a venues that's not accessible, I think that would be short-sighted.
also semiphysically disabled like I’m not wheelchair-bound but I do require accommodations anyway this is weird to say. Imagine throwing a birthday party and inviting someone who has a severe peanut allergy and you know they have a severe peanut allergy like they might die if they are within the presence of a peanut. And then you Turn around and say actually the party is going to be at a peanut brittle factory. If you want to have a birthday party at a peanut brittle factory because you love peanut brittle more than anything in the world go for it! but why on earth would you invite someone you know has conflicting accessibility needs with the venue? That just feels like weird middle school bully shit to me.
Yeah. If I, a person with both a father and an aunt who are wheelchair users, decided to get married and chose an inaccessible venue, that would be a dick move. But if it's one friend you're not super close to, planning your wedding around them is a bit over the top.
@@twideslauriers7875they expected her to take her scooter, which is apparently capable of handling the terrain. They also offered a back up plan of hauling her in on the the flatbed, but that wasn't agreeable to her. When my cousin got married they told us that the venue was *theoretically* accessible, but they weren't 100% sure every door would be a level threshold. My dad is a non-ambulatory wheelchair user, so we did the sensible thing and *took ramps with us.* We needed them, too. Someone else's wedding is not about you. They invited you because they would enjoy your company, it's up to you to decide if you can make that possible or not.
As someone who's typically bound to a wheelchair when out of the house (spinabifida,) i appreciate the op of the first story and adore Daniel's song about wheelchairs
As a certified fat man, op is NTA, the reality is, there are things us fats just can't do, unless we put in the work to lose the weight. It's hard, and may feel impossible, but it's not.
Entirely agree that OP was NTA, but it is a shame that other accommodations couldn't have been made. But the cousin was definitely in the wrong. You not only have to account for their weight, the weight of the chair, but ALSO the pushers weight, and the contact surface with the ground. That's probably close to 750-800lbs being moved through the grass on thin asf wheels and two feet. The grass will give with extreme ease. I've had to push my mom and her electric wheelchair through the grass more than once, it is no easy feat, and that was much less than 600lbs.
Right?! I can't believe people don't understand that. And I get it, some people are overweight naturally and can't lose that extra weight because of their body limits and such. But 600 FREAKING POUNDS!?!??! That is entirely your fault and it's selfish to make other people carry you around instead of going through the hard labour of losing it
Yeah, if they care about the car so much as not to leave it in the hands of a risky driver, why don't they just be the ones to drive the cousin over. I wouldnt trust a potentially bad driver with a disabled person, let alone one who can't walk if something happens. It makes me think there's something more to that, but obviously that's just speculation and I haven't finished the video lol
It's important to know your limitations. My mother has rheumatoid arthritis, and had two total knee replacements when I was 15. She needed a wheelchair during her recovery period, and I spent a lot of time helping her with it. Using a wheelchair on an uneven surface is no joke. I had a tough time pushing my mother across grassy terrain, and she is a fairly small human. At 15, I was a couple inches taller than her, and my weight was probably within 20lbs of her weight. It is not realistic to expect OP to be able to push his cousin's wheelchair in a park. I can't imagine the cousin wouldn't have been embarrassed by showing up and having everyone witnessing OP trying and failing to push her across the park. NTA.
"this isn't really something i can speak on, but what i *can* do is read it," i feel like i (and majority of people) should probably adopt this way of thinking 😭
There are times when I sit in front of a piano trying to write a banger. And then I watch a non-music specific video by this gentleman, and he just pulls one out of thin air. Such a great feeling lol
@@dyastro7479although English can be annoying, after you think it through, it makes some sense. I’ve thought about it and I get how people would find it tough. Now read back the reply and tell me why ough made 4 different sounds. I can’t!
"I've never been married, but I've seen a lot of rom-coms." I am this way! The WAY I feel like I have the right to give advice/my opinion with NO past experience is ridiculous.😂😂
19:39 The OP shared the cake recipe in the comments Dark Chocolate Cherry Cake Recipe: 1 cup of almost boiling water 3/4 cup Dutch cocoa powder 1 3/4 cup white sugar 1/4 cup brown sugar 3 whole large eggs 2/3 cup sour cream (the fatty one) 2/3 melted butter or oil 1/2 cup cherry juice (not one with added sugar) 1/4 cup milk 2 teaspoons vanilla 2 3/4 cups bake flour 1 1/2 teaspoon baking soda 2 cups of maraschino cherries Water and cocoa are mixed together in a bowl. Another bowl the sugar, oil and eggs are mixed together. It then gets strained so it is smooth Add the sour cream, cherry juice, milk and vanilla to the same bowl. Add the water when it is cool to the bowl. Add in the flour, baking soda and salt. Cut cherries in half and put in batter. Batter goes into a cake pan and cook at 350 until toothpick come clean.
My mom actually got an airplane to wait for her. To be fair though, it was a tiny local flight with like 12 people to this remote island that we're from, and if she had missed it she would have not been able to get home that day. She had run late because of a doctor's appointment and traffic. She asked them very kindly and informed the airport staff who she was (a local from the island) and that she actually knew the pilot as well, which was just something she made up on the spot. It turned out, however, that she actually did know him, and he remembered her, because she's a kindergarten teacher and he was a local too so she had actually had him in her kindergarten when he was a kid (not very unusual since it is one of only three kindergartens on the island and she's been working there nearly 40 years so she knows pretty much everyone from there). The flight was only 15 minutes late and no one seemed upset, my mom was actually quite surprised that it worked out and said afterwards that she "felt like such a Karen" when she asked them to hold the flight for her. Just a fun little story I remembered.
Looking at the cake story annoys me because that’s honestly so cool that there moms cake gets to be eaten by tons of more people. Everyone in my family loves my grandmas yelllow cake with special chocolate frosting. If she passed and we got that in a cake store it would be the coolest thing.
It doesn’t sit right with me though I guess depends on bakery and they knew it I probably feel fine but their just something that feels wrong about cause it seems like they more monetary interest in the recipe instead of moralizing it I feel like you be pissed too cause no one asked your thoughts on before doing it cause it make you feel like they don’t see your experiences with valid enough to have your input or probably how other people would feel if they had close connections to that recipe
@@bingyboi6303the kids refused to try and make the recipe, they wrote their own opinion right there and then. Don't care enough to at least attempt to make it? Then you never cared enough to make a decision about it.
@@Dont14-r4k are you sure? There probably more to than what was read in the post No mentions why they’re mad so the dad didn’t know either, maybe they’re busy with life and stuff or they didn’t wanna make cause they weren’t ready, they’re too dealing with the death of their mother as well
The mom's cake thing.... is BEAUTIFUL! If it turns out my kid doesn't have a knack for cooking, and they did something like this?! It's wonderfully preserving her memory, and even sharing her love with others. I'd be so flattered. The kids are the assholes. "Let them eat cake!"
I’m disabled as well as overweight, if my best friend had a dream wedding that wasn’t accessible I would either go to the reception if it was accessible or not go. She deserves her dream wedding. We can celebrate separately. I feel guilty going on days out, because if I take the electric chair, it’s heavy & has to be disassembled/assembled, if I take the manual then someone has to push me over bad terrain. So if someone would prefer not to take me due to these issues, I completely understand & will find other ways to spend time together. Also, the reason that rental places won’t rent for off road is because of how much wear & tear different terrains put on the wheels, the breaks, the suspension, battery etc, especially if the person is heavier, which will just add to the speed of deterioration for the vehicle. I once asked if the NHS would be able to provide me with a chair (I would be willing to pay for it but I just wanted a private reliable company to service the chair, as an independent company screwed me over & endangered me) they would only be able to provide a manual, the motorised ones could only be used inside, for similar reasons. So for multiple reasons the first person is not the A.
I feel for the disabled cousin, but another factor is the embarrassment she would have felt had a traditional non-motorized wheelchair gotten stuck in the grass while OP valiantly tried to push her out. Sadly there’s really no way she could have won here. 😢
Why do you feel bad for the cousin (assuming you’re talking about the first story because I haven’t gotten to far into the vid) she did this to herself. It is 100% her fault she is 600lbs
@@Hedgehogz856 Because all people deserve dignity, including the morbidly obese. If a person lost a leg because of a car accident they caused, you’d still feel sympathy for them. As a society we all treat fat people a lot of the time worse than we treat criminals, and that’s deeply unkind.
I'll put it this way, if you are a key figure in the wedding/party/event and are mobility disabled, the ppl holding said event will consult you on accommodations. But if you are just a regular guest, you can just say "I truly wish you the best and hope you have an amazing time, but I will be unable to make the event." If they ask why, you can then explain that the venue is not accessible to you and your particular disabilities and that's not on the hosts, it's just how it is. So you'll be there in spirit and supporting them from afar. I've had to bow out of events because my asthma said a big fat no to the weather or my back and lungs couldn't handle hills. Ive had to let my friends know that if I bow out of an event, I'm not doing ut cuz I didn"t want to come, it's cuz Im just not able to attend with my health intact. Took me going to the ER after some outdoor birthday parties to learn I couldn't just grin and bear it anymore. Does it suck? Yeah. But that's just life. Everyone has limitations, some of us just have more than others. Good friends and family understand and don't hold it against you.
as somebody time-blind I would rather 127 hours my arm than be late to a cruise in another country. I set 400 alarms for everything and would be living in pure anxiety until I boarded again
I'm 6'4 and a pretty fit guy, and i know that I could not push a wheelchair 40 yards in the grass. I also grew up in a village in alaska with a lot of cruise ship activity. I've seen groups of tourists yelling at people for "not holding up the cruise". Every cruise always has a few people who don't get on the ship on time. And every time they're always blaming everyone else except themselves.
"Make a cruiseship wait for us!" How would they do that? they couldn't get two people to listen to them, how are they meant to go and convince a whole crew with an itinerary?
The part about wheelchair accesible venues reminded me of this woman who had to post on the internet her story of being a bride on a wheelchair and asking venues if they were wheelchair accesible to which most venues would outright lie and she had to go check these places out herself to make sure they werent lying just because they put up a couple of unusable ramps and called it a day... some venues were accesible to guest but upon learning the bride was the one in a wheelchair they had to admit they werent accesible actually, because the end of the aisle had steps and stuff like that.
This was originally a response to someone else's comment but honestly the cake story exactly got me heated so I'll extend my view here. Why is no one saying how entitled and selfish the kids are? They sound like spoiled brats and they're grown adults. Their father tried making the cake himself multiple times and couldn't figure it out. He asks for his kids' help and not a single one of them wanted to. It'll be one thing if they were busy, but the father said they refused to help. Refused is a strong word. I'm sure if they were just busy, the father would have mentioned it. The father, missing his wife's cake, asks what's essentially a professional to help, and only now do they suddenly care about the legacy of their mother's cake? What did they expect?! I'm an artist myself and I bake and make cake art as a hobby. I've been told I should run a bakery but I like keeping baking and cooking just as hobbies. Every person is different, but as for me, when I die, I wouldn't mind my work being posted or displayed even if unfinished. I personally learn a lot from unfinished work and would hope to inspire someone with mine. I also share my recipes and secrets all the time. I hate the idea of limiting art and recipes personally, but that's my personal preference. As much as that woman was those kids' Mom, I'm sure those kids don't know their mother nearly as much as her husband, their dad, did. He would know better if the mother would have been ok with sharing her recipe.
As someone who cooks as a hobby and has a ton of personal recipes, the exact person who that would happen with, the cake one is really interesting to me. My recipes are just ingredient ratios if it uses standard cooking techniques, assuming that the person reading them (only me right now) are experienced with cooking and can figure the recipe out just from the ratios and a one sentence description. If I died, nobody I know would be able to use most of them. If a loved one of mine sold my recipes off to a bakery/restaurant after I died, I would be honored.
It feels different though cause selling the recipe is like letting go of someone, yes it healthy but it help no one if you force them to do it which is why I think the dad an asshole for that cause it seem like he more focus his relationship with wife he forgot the people that loved her too and felt like he discarded how they felt or didn’t care
@@bingyboi6303 You see it as letting go of someone, whereas I see it almost as the opposite. Letting go would be throwing away the recipe. What OP did was make it so that he, his family, and others could still experience something that his wife made that would have been completely lost otherwise.
@@Jupiter-T I guess though I do feel like it was rush and he didn’t value how his kids felt about since he just did it as soon as possible, maybe it’s just not realizing it through own desire or just not caring about his kids, I think the issue is more leaving out the kids then actually what he did with the recipe
Me: **eagerly waits to see what kind of casual banger Daniel will come up with this time** Daniel Thrasher: Rabies! Rabies. I'm a shark with rabies. I guess they can't all be "You're Not Invited."
Oh I always love it when the video reaches the part where Daniel makes these little, micro songs. I'm always waiting for them. Plus his goofy as well as constructive analyses and opinions. I've recently started watching from his second channel and I'm a regular now.
Thank you! I was looking for a comment saying so. Why is no one saying how entitled and selfish the kids are? They sound like spoiled brats and they're grown adults. Their father tried making the cake himself multiple times and couldn't figure it out. He asks for his kids' help and not a single one of them wanted to. It'll be one thing if they were busy, but the father said they refused to help. Refused is a strong word. I'm sure if they were just busy, the father would have mentioned it. The father, missing his wife's cake, asks what's essentially a professional to help, and only now do they suddenly care about the legacy of their mother's cake? What did they expect?!
You’re cruel sir, their mother died and were probably still dealing with it, they’re probably pissed because their dad force them to let go which is never healthy, it takes time and this dad rush it because he cared more about himself comforting himself that he forgot his kids and how they felt that’s probably why he didn’t know why they’re made because he didn’t know they were probably dealing with it too
@@fanime1do you know how it feels to give away something from a love one? It doesn’t feel good when someone force you to do it,for god sake their mother died and you’re here acting like whining about not getting a new iPhone, imagine if your dad just sold something personal to your mom deceased without asking you, you’d be pissed to cause feel like he doesn’t think you cared about her or how you felt about it
They didn't care about the cake, didn't even WANT the recipe. They Were being jerks. GROWN adults who didn't care about a legacy recipe or their father's grief.
I have time blindness but I don't show up late to things when I'm expected to be there, and I especially don't get mad at people for not waiting for me??? their behaviour has nothing to do with time blindness at all
same here. I've been late to plenty of things thanks to it. But that is entirely my own problem and my own fault to deal with. You know when you have time blindness. Its always going to get you, and you just have to be responsible for staying on top of it in any way you can manage when its especially important. And if you fall victim to it that sucks, but you just have to deal with the consequences. The only people they should have been upset with is their selves for not listening. The kid warned them again and again and gave them a final 'we need to go now'. I could only dream of having someone who would do that for me lol. time management would be so much less stressful! I've been on a cruise ship and they are VERY clear that embarkation will happen no matter if you are on the boat or not. we were all told by the security guy as they let us off, to be back on the boat at least 30 minutes before the boat leaves port.
On the cruise ship story- this is a great scenario to say “I’m sorry that that situation was inconvenient for you, let’s all get on the same page next time so this doesn’t happen again” especially if they insist on blaming you. Maybe add “what do we need to do so that we are all able to enjoy the rest of our time here”. Sometimes if you can’t accept blame you can still help people move on
Pffffftttttttt..... You've never had toxic parents before, have you? Let me put it this way, what emotionally mature and healthy adult would blame their child for a cruise ship leaving without them?
@rkj5258 You don't. If they truly are toxic parents (and the story does suggest so), then nothing less than fully accepting the blame and groveling for apology will be acceptable to them. And even then, they will continue to bring it up for years. Any discussion of cruise ships, OP's graduation or 18th birthday, whatever location they were doing the cruise in (up to and including the continent), even possibly other things like other people's kids graduating and turning eighteen, etc. will trigger anything from a poke to a rant about that time you let a cruise ship they didn't even want to go on abandon them in a foreign country and it cost SO MUCH MONEY to catch up so that they could try to continue the vacation they were doing solely for you in the first place.
@rkj5258 Good, I'm glad! 😀 Hope this helps you understand why some people like the original poster can't just have that perfectly reasonable conversation. Maybe thank your parents for being decent?
12:09-12:36 I admit, I struggle with jealousy pretty regularly (with women who look how I want to look, have the body that I want to have, are dating or in a relationship, or are achieving their dreams). (I'm even Kelly's age now. 25.) My jealousy is a terrible vice, and one I'm working on, but that advice you gave honestly put things into perspective for me. If there are things I want, I can have them. I just have to "notice what they have done in their behavior to be successful, and notice what you are doing in your behavior that's making you jealous of them." It may have meant nothing to you saying that, but it meant something to me, so thank you!!
@7:31 "waving off" picture someone giving a huff and continuing the conversation they're having while giving a quick, wrist flicking, hand motion away from them toward the person attempting to interject.
I don't know what caused OP's cousin to get to that weight as it could be genetics, medication, mental health, a medical condition, and a variety of other things. A physically and mentally healthy individual generally does not get to that weight. But as someone who does have mobility issues, none of us can really rely on anyone to fully accommodate us unless they're a carer. I find it incredibly strange that the aunt and uncle aren't available because it sounds like they're her carers and basically abandoned her. It's just an all round bad situation. It's not fair for the cousin to take it out on other people but I can guarantee the cousin probably has a lot of pent up issues surrounding it and I hope they get the help they need.
@@Hedgehogz856100% I’m so tired of this, “it could be anything causing it” BS. Medication, genetics, etc, can influence being overweight, but not 400,500,600 lbs. that’s pure overconsumption, no other reason. I have never met a person who is 350+lbs that doesn’t over consume. I have met people who due to genetics or medication put weight on easier and have harder times burning it off, but that never leads to obesity. Obesity is purely overconsumption.
@@RoastFlea61your right but a mentally and physically healthy person even if they ate a lot very likely wouldn’t let themselves get to 600lbs like your going to notice how shit you feel well before your get to 600lbs
@@jameson1239 ok but that still makes it their own fault. I don’t care if you have mental issues going on, ignoring them and continuing to stuff your face is your choice. Nobody makes you do it. Being obese is entirely 100% at fault of the person. Medications, disease, etc, will never cause obesity. They can cause weight gain, but not obesity. Anyone trying to find an excuse for their obesity is simply a shitty person, and I prefer not to associate with people who can’t even accept responsibility for their own choices. It’s everyone else’s fault that you’re 500lns right?
@@RoastFlea61 …You know that you were considered obese if you’re 180 pounds and 5 foot zero? i’ve been told my entire life that I was obese for being you know within that ratio for most of my life. most strongman and bodybuilders are considered obese as well. I’m not saying that 600 pounds is good or healthy for a human, I’m saying that it is very easy to be considered obese at a very low number. furthermore you don’t get to 600 pounds without a combination of genetics and severe mental issues whatever they may be.
To answer your question Daniel as a person in a wheelchair who has attended weddings that haven’t been the most accessible, it really depends on where it is. Most people who use wheelchairs can get across some level of grass and be perfectly fine. Obviously mud can be an issue and sand is a major issue for moving around. Most weddings I’ve seen have had some type of temporary boardwalk to get across rougher terrain, but if it’s not possible to have that then you just have to push through it and deal with it (not easy and some will have harder times and need a hand, but it is not physically impossible in most cases) honestly it’s just something we have to deal with, but it’s not anything new. Every day is a challenge to get through life finding the accessible way so it honestly gets tiring to complain about things and I find it better to just deal with it and treat it all like it’s not a big deal. Yes, it’s an inconvenience, but it’s not my place to get angry with someone because the world wasn’t designed around my disability. If I have to get out of my chair and crawl up a few flights of stairs then so be it. Great to see you asking the question though and sorry that’s a good bit of info, but thought I’d share the perspective :)
“Im alone” Haha, same. My dad’s family are all across the world, in a country I can’t go to for safety reasons. My moms side of the family are severely unstable so I don’t know them either. People who know their whole extended family shock me, cause I only know my parents and siblings.
Thank you for the advice! I thought about what successful people have that I don't. Turns out, the answer is functional kidneys. So, once I steal someone's kidneys, I'll be set!
As to the 'abielest' comment (since the rest is obvious): i think it comes down to 'not your wedding'. If you cant go because of a wheelchair then you cant go, just as with any other situation. If you arent close enough to make special arrangements with them then its not that big of a deal to ruin the day for them.
Then why are you inviting someone you know cannot attend? If it’s such a big deal for you to get married in a place that’s not accessible by wheelchair, why are you inviting someone you know needs a wheelchair? That feels like you’re rubbing it in their face that they can’t do things, and that’s really weird and cruel, and those people have every right to bitch you out for it
the cake story is so cuteeee😭the husband just wanting to have a moment from the past to mourn his wife with her special cake recipe is absolutely beautifullll!!!😭
As someone who likes to bake, i would be over the moon if I'd made a recipe and a bakery thought it was good enough they wanted to have permission to regular sell it, like that is so cool!
All cruises specifically and EXPLICITLY tell you.... ALL ABOARD time is inviable and you WILL BE LEFT. No negotiation, do not pass go, do not collect $200.
23:04 This is exactly how I feel about the discussion near the end of the first story. It is your wedding, the final decision should come from you and your spouse. If you and your partner come to the agreement that you both want a beach venue, go for it. Sure if there are people attending who might find it difficult to do so because of the venue you should always try your best to accommodate them and make sure the event is enjoyable for everyone. BUT again it is YOUR wedding, imo it should be a day in which the priority centers around you and your significant other.
The cruise ship story where the parents are mad she left them behind blows my mind. Dont they realize it wouldve just been more expensive if she had stayed and missed the ship with them? Then they would've had to pay for 3 plane tickets to the next destination versus the 2 they had to pay for. The daughter saved them money
It sounds like the cousin tries their best and often helps them but just has a realistic understanding of the practicality of this idea. It also sounds like the overweight cousin has grown to feel entitled to their help and is deflecting. Also if they are worried about their transportation being embarrassing, they should also know that it would be embarrassing if she got stuck and they had to call the fire department or something to get her unstuck and interrupt the wedding.
I see a theme here. A lot of people seem to think they are assholes if they have to enforce their boundaries or rights because others will not acknowledge them. Sometimes you just have to put your foot down and draw a hard line, even if it comes off as hard to others. Otherwise you're going to be treated as a pushover. And with the wedding, if someone is THIS mad about you inviting THEM WITH THEIR PARTNER to a wedding, then that is extremely sketchy.
As a baker, if my husband had a favorite recipe of mine I would want him to find a way to be able to recreate it. And I’d be happy to have it sold. On the kids side, I’d hope the bakery would clarify the recipe for them so it can stay in the family. Could be a really nice opportunity to have a yearly fundraiser at the bakery where on my anniversary X amount of proceeds can go to a charity in her name. Being able to go get your moms baking on a bad day is still a gift.
I work in healthcare - and even though I'm (sadly) well known for my ability to lift and push despite not being built for it ... Err .. NO. Wheelchairs act very differently when someone is overweight, I have yet to push a 300kg human around (feet touching the ground I assume as a bonus difficulty perk) but even 200kgs (rougly 440 p) means that the bushing on the wheels are failing, so you have to fight friction on top of the weight. I understand that someone going far past the point of no-return would feel miserable, but I'm sorry it is your problem. You can't ask someone else to destroy their body just so you can keep cramming food into your mouth, it's not a clean way to think. I do stupid shit every day to help lazy people do what they have to do, and my back tells me that I can perhaps keep working in the industry for like 5 more years tops - coming from strangers its one thing, but your own family? Get some dignity!
Also your kids are going to be besties 80% of the time. 20 % of the time they will be mortal foes in an epic clash of hatred and sibling cruelty. It's the way of things.
3:21 Pretty sure this person went way out of their way to problem solve and couldn't. IMAGINE if the wc GOT STUCK!!! That would be humiliating. & There's a good chance. Plus we don't know how old/strong op is. It's not their fault and that's really sad on the larger cousin that she can't see that she tried. Unfortunately the cousin does not like the options afforded her so it is up to her if she wants to go or not. THEN cousin took it out on yet another person, The mother of the bride, Who luckily had a spine!!! And she was not going to have that kind of attitude at her daughter's wedding! 😅
I've definitely had an old acquantaince who was in a mutual close friend group, he always brings down the energy and makes misogynistic remarks any chance he gets. No way an I inviting that person to my wedding. He definitely was upset after he found out we had the wedding and he was the only one of the group not invited.
The last story sounds like a sister post to a reddit story called "My (28F) boyfriend (29M) and his best friend (29F) are going on a week-long vacation. They uninvited me" which was likely posted by the brother's ex girlfriend, as the entire situation was very similar to what was described here. The original reddit post has been deleted, but I know Smosh read it a few weeks back in the episode "nightmare vacation stories" if anyone is interested in finding out about that whole situation
PEOPLE DO NOT NEED TO CATER A WEDDING TO ANYONE. I've seen people with ADHD try to do this the other day. These issues are very real things, but the world doesn't revolve around them. The wedding day is for the couple. They can do what they want and let them figure out solutions. I know that sounds selfish, and of course this is within reason, but sometimes you just have to deal with the fact that life is not about you.
I'm a patient transporter. It is literally my job to push patients around in beds, stretchers, and wheelchairs. 300 lbs is more than many people would be able to move without training. When I started the job, I had to work very hard not to huff and puff pushing that kind of weight by standard wheelchair. I'm much stronger now and we have special wheelchair for XL patients, but in the beginning, pushing 300lbs made me feel like I was going to die.
600 lbs requires at least two patient transporters working together, and is still a big task that exerts a lot of energy. I wouldn't expect anyone to push 600 pounds unassisted, especially over uneven ground.
I understand that obesity is a very sensitive subject, and people suffering with it tend to have a difficult time differentiating between the hostility people show them every day for a problem that went out of their control years ago, and genuine acknowledgement of actual physical limits. I always figure that if I was insulted and mistreated as frequently as someone with an obesity problem is, I would also probably be pretty sensitive about the issue, so my heart goes out to the cousin, but there was clearly nothing OP could do.
This is the only respectful comment I've seen regarding the cousin in the first story
Thank you for giving your input on this, and being respectful in the process
Another thing I’ve been thinking about too is not only would OP have to push Cousin on uneven ground with no help, but also probably in a fancy/layered outfit that would restrict some mobility.
It would definitely be a safety issue potentially for both parties involved. I imagine it would be extremely easy to pull a muscle or fall if you have zero training and probably have never even attempted to push or pull something of that weight.
My husband was in a wheelchair for almost a year before he had his surgery, and this person is definitely NTA. It was really tough to do even mild slopes and sidewalks with him in the wheelchair and he and the wheelchair was about 200lbs. Pushing a 600lb person plus wheelchair over grass... I would get about ten feet before giving up lol
It wouldn't be safe honestly. You hit one small rock and the chair could tip over, and then you'd have to call 911 to get her back up. If they really wanted this cousin to be there, someone could have helped them rent a U-Haul utility trailer to put the scooter into - for $35 you can rent a utility trailer with a ramp.
Ten feet would be a miracle for me to push, I’d be lucky to be able to push them 10 inches.
600 pounds, even on wheels I don’t think I’d be able to make that budge
Even just pushing a wheelchair with a light person in it is very hard, on pavement sp I would say nta. I'm pretty strong but had a hard time pushing my 150lbs friend around on pavement.
I can't imagine pushing around someone who is 600lbs that seems impossible ngl
How can anyone ever allow themselves to be that fat?
“Sadly, my cousin was hostile towards the bride’s mother…so her invitation was retracted.” 😂
I heard this story before the update on another channel but that was pre-update so it was nice to see the resolution
She was entitled for sure....
+@@JakeAdkinsOfficial tbh it was probably embarrassment manifesting as hostility. Many such cases in the 600+ lb.
@@kindauncoolhard to imagine that, I have some arthritis and cold intolerance issues that have become frustratingly inhibitive and I often have to remind people that I need certain specific conditions in order to function and I feel so bad about it. I don’t doubt what you’re saying I just genuinely can’t imagine being so hostile about a lack of accommodation that I was uninvited from an event
I saw this on my reddit feed before they made the update, im glad to know that OP didnt have to go through with something no one else was willing to compromise on
One of the sweetest things I've seen online was a gravestone with a cupcake recipe on the back. The wife/mom/grandma died and before her death she asked for the recipe that everyone in the family loved to be engraved on the back of the gravestone so everyone knows how to make it themselves. It just felt so sweet and loving.
A little while ago I found an account online that would make recipes that people put on their gravestones. I don't remember the account name but I think it's such a sweet idea for people to pass on their secret recipes after they die. The way I see it, it's a great way to keep their legacy alive and share it with the world
@@kiwid3628 Gotta go hunt for this, I've been baking so much I'm running out of new things to bake
That is the sweetest thing I have read in a long long time. Thank you for this, it made me smile.
I bet every time they asked grandma for the recipe, she'd say "Over my dead body" and had the gravestone paid off before her death 😆 And then on the funeral, where was the recipe? Over her dead body
Lovely story, but my first
Reaction is DAMN that would he expensive
"Hey, you know how your mobility scooters are able to go over grass?"
"yeah"
"Can I rent one?"
"where are you gonna use it?"
"Over some grass."
"FUCK no"
The combo of the weight and gras usage may have been an issue. At 600lb its pretty much guaranteed to get stuck in thr grass.
It’s their equipment they have to maintain and make money on. Most rental companies no matter what type of vehicle you rent will have rules similar to these.
@@benry007 True, but it’s just hilarious they probably didn’t have much context and decided “hm… nope! you can’t use one of our scooters, goodbye, good luck!” or even with the context, they still denied them to even *try* to make it work 😂🥲
@@darthbauer5153so then who are they renting off-road scooters to if they can't be used off-road?
❤
The cruise ship story makes me so crazy. I went on a cruise and the FIRST thing they tell you is “DO NOT BE LATE FOR EMBARKATION WE WILL LEAVE YOU.”
Like literally. Every time we docked to go ashore, there was a literal hallway of staff reminding us what all-aboard time was, and to make sure we were wearing watches that synced up with the SHIP’S time because not all ports were on the same time zone.
It’s so so so stupid to me that these people literally thought a whole ass cruise ship would WAIT for them. Like WHAT.
I don't want to judge them too much, but they sounded a little stuck up to me.
@@nicjoy4407a little stuck up!?!?? When you blame your 18 year old kid for NOT being able to control a cruise ship for YOUR convenience, that's MUCH more than "a little stuck up!" That's just...bad parenting! One of THE worst things a parent can do is blame a kid for their own mistakes!
@@yeshevishmanpart of me wonders if the parents are maybe just joking about it like, maybe they’ll say “don’t leave us again” in a joking kinda way if the daughter is leaving the room? But most of me knows that anyone who gives a gift with the caveat of that gift being a bunch of other things, some of which include your loyalty and consideration while using said gift, is a jerk. Plus they probably bend the rules all the time, most people with money do. Blaming the daughter takes away from the cognitive dissonance of the notion that you aren’t inherently entitled to special treatment and the world, including your kid who was given a loaded birthday/graduation “gift” you forced her to bring you along for, doesn’t revolve around you. A real graduation/birthday gift would have been a cruise for the daughter and one of her friends.
I’m looking in my crystal ball and I’m seeing a future stressful wedding that’s gonna be a real shit show bc of these people paying for it. My advice is, take their money bc they’ll be this way whether or not they paid, their excuses will just be different.
Still tho, great problems to have compared to many of the alternatives
I'm wondering if they thought the cruise would wait because a child's parents weren't with them. Obviously, the girl I'd old enough to survive without her parents, but it made me wonder: What if a four year old wandered back to the ship alone... would they wait for the parents?
@@welcome2myhappyworld I don't think staying is a option they physically can do without costing them a shit ton of money, I'm sure that they have some sort of protocol for scenarios like that.
8:12 Time blindness isn't an issue when someone is saying in your face, "Hey we need to go, we need to get to the ship." They were just being entitled. Time blindness would have only come in if they had turned around and said we'll go in a minute when the kid finally gave up and said they were leaving. Then they would be like, "Oh we hadn't realized so much time had passed." But instead they were, "Why didn't you make them wait for us." Putting thr blame on the adult child instead of on their own actions or inactions.
Yeah, this. And time blindness is often a symptom of ADHD. It's not a one-off thing, it's a condition and is distressing. The parents are deliberately ignoring the time warning
Exactly! I hate it when people use time blindness as an excuse for their behaviour. It’s a serious issue and people like this make it seem ridiculous and childish.
Edit to clarify: I know this couple didn’t use time blindness as an excuse but I’m speaking generally.
@@LycanKai14 exactly. My time blindness is fairly severe and causes me so much anxiety. I swear I am either always nearly late or 30 mins early
i have adhd and experience time blindness. yea sometimes i'm late for stuff but for really important things i set multiple alarms so even if i get a lil distracted there will be another alarm like oh yea i gotta go yo . time is a freaking mystery to me, i always think things are gonna take less or more time than they actually take, but that is no excuse in this situation
time blindness isn't a real thing. people are just lazy. plus clocks and alarms are literally in our pockets 24/7
Also, Kelly is a whole ass adult and needed to hear what mom said. Mom would be doing her daughter a disservice by sugar coating that truth. She used her daughter’s own words to deliver a wake up call.
Exactly you shouldn't call your kid a loser but news flash she's not a kid she's ready for the cold hard truth 😅
The context is really important. Her mom disagrees with the hierarchy Kelly assumes the world has, but since she won't let go of that perception her mom used that phrasing to let her know she's not on top of the world (entitled) like she thinks she is
Yep, using the same wording is the key here. She is hitting her with her own framing.
Mother sounds like an asshole, not shocked she raised kids who are jealous of each other. Note the framing “then she’s the loser now.” NOW. She just acknowledged that her other daughter was a loser in high school. She called both her kids losers, she used the same language as her daughter who learned it somewhere. You aren’t a loser cos you study and have a small group of friends, you aren’t a loser if don’t do well in school and are social.
Mums a loser.
Kelly been having too much sugar coated for sure
I prepared myself to not be surprised by the surprise microphone, but then there was no surprise microphone, so now I am surprised XD
He pulled out a surprise microphone! :O
Now I'm twice as surprised!!
I thought the shirt unbuttoning would be one 😂
He pulled out a subtle surprise microphone tho. AND a return of the microphone
same
Same honestly
"She was a loser in high school & it isn't fair that she has everything"
Kelly is giving off "once a big fish in small pond to big fish drowning in the ocean" energy...
Totally. I'm glad I didn't pique in high school😂
@@abbyz9790peak
You haven’t ‘pique’ now either. I doubt you will ever ‘pique’.
Just a joke, don’t many anything real by it (it’s peaked, not pique😅)
Literally minutes ago I spelt “played” as “plaid”, no one is immune.😢
@@kmhkennedyjust to jump in on the fun, you couldn’t ever really “ _many_ anything real by it” anyway. Any way? 🫣Certainly 🏃🏼♀️💨 not 👀🫨 -ANYWAYS- 👀😩😭🧎🏼♀️ 🌊🌋🔥 🌎💥☄️🪂
lol, word nerds gonna word nerd 🫶🏻
Sincerely,
A Fellow Pedant
@@rainbomg oh lol. 🫠
I’ll leave it as is, unedited, as testimony to idiocy 🥳
They shouldn't be mad at the kid. They should be grateful that they didn't have to pay for a third plane ticket. That's what he should tell his parents.
as a wheelchair user NTA, i can barely push myself in my chair on uneven surfaces and i am much lighter than the cousin, wheelchairs take a LOT of physical strength to move.
That first one is pretty wild. They don't trust OP enough to drive the truck with the scooter but they do trust them enough to drive the cousin 🤔
😂😂 omg you're so right!
The cousin has a build in all-around bumper though 🙈
People who own trucks usually don't have trucks for a logical reason though. I imagine that stretches to other areas.
@@truthteller880The stupid thing is they apparently have it in order to help their daughter travel around, but they didn't want to loan it to OP to help their daughter travel
Exactly my thought process! Super strange 🤨
As someone with adhd and pretty bad time blindness if someone tells me “hey we need to leave right now” and I’m not in the middle of doing something (paying for something, finishing getting dresses, putting on shoes, etc.) I go, I don’t just wait and loose track of time (cus I know I will) I just go wherever I need to go when the other person says it’s time to go, I’ve also been on a few cruises and they literally cannot wait for you, cruises and such stick to a super strict schedule that they arent gonna bend for a couple of irresponsible adults
Same
Right! I know I have time blindness issues and I have alarms, calendars and notes everywhere lol , once you get into the habit it helps tremendously
Watching Daniel judge random people on the internet makes my day
"Rabies, rabies. I will eat your babies"
- daniel, 2024
10:56 Thank you for saving me the effort of typing that quote myself!
“I wanna eat your wife’s cake too.”
-D. Thrasher, 2024
Hahahahaha was literally typing this out until I saw your comment last second 🤣
truly a bop
yes but also....WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT DANIEL FAILING MISERABLY AT SHOWING US 40 YARDS AND THE EDITOR EMPHASIZING IT 🤣
Was about ready for him to bust out "You're Not Invited" for the last story, lol.
How did he miss that?!
I was scrolling through the comments for someone to say this!!
@@LeanAndMean44 I doubt he still has it saved on his soundboard
@@SnowLily06 he should
YOOOOOOUUUUURE NOT INVIIIIIIIIIITEEEEEEEEEEDDDDDD
"I've never been married but I've seen a lot of rom-coms" is a wild thing to say 😂
True. That's like a guy saying 'I have no experience with how it is being a woman, but I've seen women on the street. So I got a fair grasp of things like periods etc imo.'
I was scrolling and found this comment as he said it 😂😂😂
That’s like giving tips about sex because you’ve seen a lot of porn! 😂
I am so glad the bride invited that girl because she didn’t deserve that level of disrespect. She should feel like at least someone cares about her and wants her there. That man is messing everything up and he’s going to die alone and it’s going to be no one‘s fault but his own.
Something tells me they are not going to be together by the end of that wedding
@@Hulk_Lover I'm putting my money on them ending even before the wedding
@@Hulk_Lover oh 100%, not a doubt in my mind.
@@Hulk_Lover I dohope that she stays in the friend group, though
There was an update afterwards where they do breakup but she decides not to go to the wedding either
For those wondering, he did share the recipe to the cake in the comments of the reddit post!!
I'm definitely gonna try making it this next week, and leave a comment thanking him for sharing it.
/me squeals and runs to reddit
YES! I’m glad he shared the recipe so the cake’s legacy can continue! Dark chocolate cherry cake must carry on!
I now have plans for the weekend! This should be the top comment BTW. Thanks for the update.
I'm useless at baking, I really struggle with following directions and baking doesn't forgive skipping steps and coming back to them after. I still hunted down that recipe and I'm going to attempt it when I feel brave
@roor6846 good luck! 👍
just quickly on the first one, as a disabled person (not obese, just a cripple), i would be SO embarrassed if someone was asked to go OUT OF STATE to essentially babysit me. and the whole "unacceptable venue" thing is really fucking simple. you, as a guest, do not matter nearly as much as the bride and groom. the one time id say otherwise is if you are INSANELY close to the people getting married, then its like ok, maybe they should have been a little more considerate. regardless, op's cousin is a massive AH for many reasons.
Yes I agree. If the attendee is in the immediate family of the Bride or the groom and they still pick a venues that's not accessible, I think that would be short-sighted.
also semiphysically disabled like I’m not wheelchair-bound but I do require accommodations anyway this is weird to say. Imagine throwing a birthday party and inviting someone who has a severe peanut allergy and you know they have a severe peanut allergy like they might die if they are within the presence of a peanut. And then you Turn around and say actually the party is going to be at a peanut brittle factory. If you want to have a birthday party at a peanut brittle factory because you love peanut brittle more than anything in the world go for it! but why on earth would you invite someone you know has conflicting accessibility needs with the venue? That just feels like weird middle school bully shit to me.
Yeah. If I, a person with both a father and an aunt who are wheelchair users, decided to get married and chose an inaccessible venue, that would be a dick move. But if it's one friend you're not super close to, planning your wedding around them is a bit over the top.
@@twideslauriers7875they expected her to take her scooter, which is apparently capable of handling the terrain. They also offered a back up plan of hauling her in on the the flatbed, but that wasn't agreeable to her.
When my cousin got married they told us that the venue was *theoretically* accessible, but they weren't 100% sure every door would be a level threshold. My dad is a non-ambulatory wheelchair user, so we did the sensible thing and *took ramps with us.* We needed them, too. Someone else's wedding is not about you. They invited you because they would enjoy your company, it's up to you to decide if you can make that possible or not.
As someone who's typically bound to a wheelchair when out of the house (spinabifida,) i appreciate the op of the first story and adore Daniel's song about wheelchairs
I don't even use a wheelchair and still think that song is a bop
As a certified fat man, op is NTA, the reality is, there are things us fats just can't do, unless we put in the work to lose the weight. It's hard, and may feel impossible, but it's not.
and defs not ableism!!!
I love that you acknowledge this, kudos to you.
L
Entirely agree that OP was NTA, but it is a shame that other accommodations couldn't have been made. But the cousin was definitely in the wrong. You not only have to account for their weight, the weight of the chair, but ALSO the pushers weight, and the contact surface with the ground. That's probably close to 750-800lbs being moved through the grass on thin asf wheels and two feet. The grass will give with extreme ease. I've had to push my mom and her electric wheelchair through the grass more than once, it is no easy feat, and that was much less than 600lbs.
Right?! I can't believe people don't understand that. And I get it, some people are overweight naturally and can't lose that extra weight because of their body limits and such. But 600 FREAKING POUNDS!?!??! That is entirely your fault and it's selfish to make other people carry you around instead of going through the hard labour of losing it
Regarding the first story... that won't loan the car just yells: "I don't trust you with my car, but I trust you with my daughter's life."
Yeah, if they care about the car so much as not to leave it in the hands of a risky driver, why don't they just be the ones to drive the cousin over. I wouldnt trust a potentially bad driver with a disabled person, let alone one who can't walk if something happens. It makes me think there's something more to that, but obviously that's just speculation and I haven't finished the video lol
Unlike the car, the cousin has protective layers.
It's important to know your limitations.
My mother has rheumatoid arthritis, and had two total knee replacements when I was 15. She needed a wheelchair during her recovery period, and I spent a lot of time helping her with it. Using a wheelchair on an uneven surface is no joke. I had a tough time pushing my mother across grassy terrain, and she is a fairly small human. At 15, I was a couple inches taller than her, and my weight was probably within 20lbs of her weight. It is not realistic to expect OP to be able to push his cousin's wheelchair in a park. I can't imagine the cousin wouldn't have been embarrassed by showing up and having everyone witnessing OP trying and failing to push her across the park. NTA.
Sometimes it's not about the asshole, sometimes it's about the songs made along the way.
i absolutely love your profile picture
nah, its about the song inside the asshole
@@fiftyzanes thank you
"this isn't really something i can speak on, but what i *can* do is read it," i feel like i (and majority of people) should probably adopt this way of thinking 😭
0:11 Whoa. I had no idea you'd gotten THIS successful, Daniel. Congrats on landing _Robert freakin' De Niro_ for a cameo in your video, dude!
There are times when I sit in front of a piano trying to write a banger. And then I watch a non-music specific video by this gentleman, and he just pulls one out of thin air. Such a great feeling lol
"I want to eat your wife's cake too"
My EYEBROWS! I lost them into my hairline!
The way he paused before he said cake...
jealously didn’t get a red underline because it is a word. An adverb conjugation of the adjective jealous.
God i hate English sometimes......
@@dyastro7479although English can be annoying, after you think it through, it makes some sense. I’ve thought about it and I get how people would find it tough. Now read back the reply and tell me why ough made 4 different sounds. I can’t!
A blah blah blah conju-blah blah of the adjablahblah English is a dumb language 💀
It still should have still underlined it for the grammatical error. Red for mispelling, blue for grammar inaccuracy.
Exactly - 'he looked jealousy at the painting' is perfectly reasonable.
"I've never been married, but I've seen a lot of rom-coms." I am this way! The WAY I feel like I have the right to give advice/my opinion with NO past experience is ridiculous.😂😂
Congratulations, you're human :D
19:39 The OP shared the cake recipe in the comments
Dark Chocolate Cherry Cake Recipe:
1 cup of almost boiling water
3/4 cup Dutch cocoa powder
1 3/4 cup white sugar
1/4 cup brown sugar
3 whole large eggs
2/3 cup sour cream (the fatty one)
2/3 melted butter or oil
1/2 cup cherry juice (not one with added sugar)
1/4 cup milk
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 3/4 cups bake flour
1 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
2 cups of maraschino cherries
Water and cocoa are mixed together in a bowl.
Another bowl the sugar, oil and eggs are mixed together.
It then gets strained so it is smooth
Add the sour cream, cherry juice, milk and vanilla to the same bowl.
Add the water when it is cool to the bowl.
Add in the flour, baking soda and salt. Cut cherries in half and put in batter. Batter goes into a cake pan and cook at 350 until toothpick come clean.
My mom actually got an airplane to wait for her. To be fair though, it was a tiny local flight with like 12 people to this remote island that we're from, and if she had missed it she would have not been able to get home that day. She had run late because of a doctor's appointment and traffic. She asked them very kindly and informed the airport staff who she was (a local from the island) and that she actually knew the pilot as well, which was just something she made up on the spot. It turned out, however, that she actually did know him, and he remembered her, because she's a kindergarten teacher and he was a local too so she had actually had him in her kindergarten when he was a kid (not very unusual since it is one of only three kindergartens on the island and she's been working there nearly 40 years so she knows pretty much everyone from there). The flight was only 15 minutes late and no one seemed upset, my mom was actually quite surprised that it worked out and said afterwards that she "felt like such a Karen" when she asked them to hold the flight for her. Just a fun little story I remembered.
Looking at the cake story annoys me because that’s honestly so cool that there moms cake gets to be eaten by tons of more people.
Everyone in my family loves my grandmas yelllow cake with special chocolate frosting. If she passed and we got that in a cake store it would be the coolest thing.
It doesn’t sit right with me though
I guess depends on bakery and they knew it I probably feel fine but their just something that feels wrong about cause it seems like they more monetary interest in the recipe instead of moralizing it
I feel like you be pissed too cause no one asked your thoughts on before doing it cause it make you feel like they don’t see your experiences with valid enough to have your input or probably how other people would feel if they had close connections to that recipe
Agreed. It's way better than letting the recipe die like the kids wanted it to
@@raerohan4241 i don’t think they wanted that
@@bingyboi6303the kids refused to try and make the recipe, they wrote their own opinion right there and then.
Don't care enough to at least attempt to make it? Then you never cared enough to make a decision about it.
@@Dont14-r4k are you sure? There probably more to than what was read in the post
No mentions why they’re mad so the dad didn’t know either, maybe they’re busy with life and stuff or they didn’t wanna make cause they weren’t ready, they’re too dealing with the death of their mother as well
The mom's cake thing.... is BEAUTIFUL! If it turns out my kid doesn't have a knack for cooking, and they did something like this?! It's wonderfully preserving her memory, and even sharing her love with others. I'd be so flattered. The kids are the assholes. "Let them eat cake!"
I’m disabled as well as overweight, if my best friend had a dream wedding that wasn’t accessible I would either go to the reception if it was accessible or not go. She deserves her dream wedding. We can celebrate separately.
I feel guilty going on days out, because if I take the electric chair, it’s heavy & has to be disassembled/assembled, if I take the manual then someone has to push me over bad terrain. So if someone would prefer not to take me due to these issues, I completely understand & will find other ways to spend time together.
Also, the reason that rental places won’t rent for off road is because of how much wear & tear different terrains put on the wheels, the breaks, the suspension, battery etc, especially if the person is heavier, which will just add to the speed of deterioration for the vehicle.
I once asked if the NHS would be able to provide me with a chair (I would be willing to pay for it but I just wanted a private reliable company to service the chair, as an independent company screwed me over & endangered me) they would only be able to provide a manual, the motorised ones could only be used inside, for similar reasons.
So for multiple reasons the first person is not the A.
You have a moral responsibility to search those comments for the cake recipe and share with us
Someone commented the recipe on here 👀 you just gotta find it lol if you didn't already know
I feel for the disabled cousin, but another factor is the embarrassment she would have felt had a traditional non-motorized wheelchair gotten stuck in the grass while OP valiantly tried to push her out. Sadly there’s really no way she could have won here. 😢
Why do you feel bad for the cousin (assuming you’re talking about the first story because I haven’t gotten to far into the vid) she did this to herself. It is 100% her fault she is 600lbs
@@Hedgehogz856 Because all people deserve dignity, including the morbidly obese. If a person lost a leg because of a car accident they caused, you’d still feel sympathy for them. As a society we all treat fat people a lot of the time worse than we treat criminals, and that’s deeply unkind.
@@MeredithHagan yes they deserve dignity but their problems are completely THEIR FAULT
@@Hedgehogz856 And yet they still deserve compassion. Lots of people need help to solve problems they’ve created for themselves.
@@MeredithHagan I won’t feel bad if it is your fault
“You’ve gotta account for the weight of the wheelchair!” Got me dancing and is a straight up bop.
“I’m alone!”
😐
“Let’s move on”
I'll put it this way, if you are a key figure in the wedding/party/event and are mobility disabled, the ppl holding said event will consult you on accommodations. But if you are just a regular guest, you can just say "I truly wish you the best and hope you have an amazing time, but I will be unable to make the event." If they ask why, you can then explain that the venue is not accessible to you and your particular disabilities and that's not on the hosts, it's just how it is. So you'll be there in spirit and supporting them from afar. I've had to bow out of events because my asthma said a big fat no to the weather or my back and lungs couldn't handle hills. Ive had to let my friends know that if I bow out of an event, I'm not doing ut cuz I didn"t want to come, it's cuz Im just not able to attend with my health intact. Took me going to the ER after some outdoor birthday parties to learn I couldn't just grin and bear it anymore. Does it suck? Yeah. But that's just life. Everyone has limitations, some of us just have more than others. Good friends and family understand and don't hold it against you.
as somebody time-blind I would rather 127 hours my arm than be late to a cruise in another country. I set 400 alarms for everything and would be living in pure anxiety until I boarded again
I'm 6'4 and a pretty fit guy, and i know that I could not push a wheelchair 40 yards in the grass.
I also grew up in a village in alaska with a lot of cruise ship activity. I've seen groups of tourists yelling at people for "not holding up the cruise". Every cruise always has a few people who don't get on the ship on time. And every time they're always blaming everyone else except themselves.
"Make a cruiseship wait for us!" How would they do that? they couldn't get two people to listen to them, how are they meant to go and convince a whole crew with an itinerary?
And FOUR THOUSAND PASSENGERS
I think the bakery should name the cake somehow after the woman who made it.. even if the husband doesn't require it.
The part about wheelchair accesible venues reminded me of this woman who had to post on the internet her story of being a bride on a wheelchair and asking venues if they were wheelchair accesible to which most venues would outright lie and she had to go check these places out herself to make sure they werent lying just because they put up a couple of unusable ramps and called it a day... some venues were accesible to guest but upon learning the bride was the one in a wheelchair they had to admit they werent accesible actually, because the end of the aisle had steps and stuff like that.
This was originally a response to someone else's comment but honestly the cake story exactly got me heated so I'll extend my view here. Why is no one saying how entitled and selfish the kids are? They sound like spoiled brats and they're grown adults. Their father tried making the cake himself multiple times and couldn't figure it out. He asks for his kids' help and not a single one of them wanted to. It'll be one thing if they were busy, but the father said they refused to help. Refused is a strong word. I'm sure if they were just busy, the father would have mentioned it. The father, missing his wife's cake, asks what's essentially a professional to help, and only now do they suddenly care about the legacy of their mother's cake? What did they expect?!
I'm an artist myself and I bake and make cake art as a hobby. I've been told I should run a bakery but I like keeping baking and cooking just as hobbies. Every person is different, but as for me, when I die, I wouldn't mind my work being posted or displayed even if unfinished. I personally learn a lot from unfinished work and would hope to inspire someone with mine. I also share my recipes and secrets all the time. I hate the idea of limiting art and recipes personally, but that's my personal preference. As much as that woman was those kids' Mom, I'm sure those kids don't know their mother nearly as much as her husband, their dad, did. He would know better if the mother would have been ok with sharing her recipe.
As someone who cooks as a hobby and has a ton of personal recipes, the exact person who that would happen with, the cake one is really interesting to me. My recipes are just ingredient ratios if it uses standard cooking techniques, assuming that the person reading them (only me right now) are experienced with cooking and can figure the recipe out just from the ratios and a one sentence description. If I died, nobody I know would be able to use most of them. If a loved one of mine sold my recipes off to a bakery/restaurant after I died, I would be honored.
It feels different though cause selling the recipe is like letting go of someone, yes it healthy but it help no one if you force them to do it which is why I think the dad an asshole for that cause it seem like he more focus his relationship with wife he forgot the people that loved her too and felt like he discarded how they felt or didn’t care
@@bingyboi6303 You see it as letting go of someone, whereas I see it almost as the opposite. Letting go would be throwing away the recipe. What OP did was make it so that he, his family, and others could still experience something that his wife made that would have been completely lost otherwise.
@@Jupiter-T I guess though I do feel like it was rush and he didn’t value how his kids felt about since he just did it as soon as possible, maybe it’s just not realizing it through own desire or just not caring about his kids, I think the issue is more leaving out the kids then actually what he did with the recipe
@@bingyboi6303 If I were him I'd assume the kids didn't care one way or the other. They didn't seem to care when he'd brought it up in the past.
@@Jupiter-T that’s his point of view though, we are only seeing it through his lens
Me: **eagerly waits to see what kind of casual banger Daniel will come up with this time**
Daniel Thrasher: Rabies! Rabies. I'm a shark with rabies.
I guess they can't all be "You're Not Invited."
Guys I think Daniel wants the cake
“I want to eat your wifes cake too” is wild out of context
The last story has updates on her Reddit account and the story gets even crazier
Are you able to post a link? I'm very curious now
Me too..reddit link?
Oh I always love it when the video reaches the part where Daniel makes these little, micro songs. I'm always waiting for them. Plus his goofy as well as constructive analyses and opinions. I've recently started watching from his second channel and I'm a regular now.
You getting side tracked by your need for cake is so relatable.... I also want the CAKE 😂❤
Cake Story - "I'm not saying the kids are jerks".........I am. The kids are jerks. Screw 'em.
Thank you! I was looking for a comment saying so. Why is no one saying how entitled and selfish the kids are? They sound like spoiled brats and they're grown adults. Their father tried making the cake himself multiple times and couldn't figure it out. He asks for his kids' help and not a single one of them wanted to. It'll be one thing if they were busy, but the father said they refused to help. Refused is a strong word. I'm sure if they were just busy, the father would have mentioned it. The father, missing his wife's cake, asks what's essentially a professional to help, and only now do they suddenly care about the legacy of their mother's cake? What did they expect?!
You’re cruel sir, their mother died and were probably still dealing with it, they’re probably pissed because their dad force them to let go which is never healthy, it takes time and this dad rush it because he cared more about himself comforting himself that he forgot his kids and how they felt that’s probably why he didn’t know why they’re made because he didn’t know they were probably dealing with it too
@@fanime1do you know how it feels to give away something from a love one? It doesn’t feel good when someone force you to do it,for god sake their mother died and you’re here acting like whining about not getting a new iPhone, imagine if your dad just sold something personal to your mom deceased without asking you, you’d be pissed to cause feel like he doesn’t think you cared about her or how you felt about it
They didn't care about the cake, didn't even WANT the recipe. They Were being jerks. GROWN adults who didn't care about a legacy recipe or their father's grief.
I have time blindness but I don't show up late to things when I'm expected to be there, and I especially don't get mad at people for not waiting for me??? their behaviour has nothing to do with time blindness at all
same here. I've been late to plenty of things thanks to it. But that is entirely my own problem and my own fault to deal with. You know when you have time blindness. Its always going to get you, and you just have to be responsible for staying on top of it in any way you can manage when its especially important. And if you fall victim to it that sucks, but you just have to deal with the consequences. The only people they should have been upset with is their selves for not listening. The kid warned them again and again and gave them a final 'we need to go now'. I could only dream of having someone who would do that for me lol. time management would be so much less stressful!
I've been on a cruise ship and they are VERY clear that embarkation will happen no matter if you are on the boat or not. we were all told by the security guy as they let us off, to be back on the boat at least 30 minutes before the boat leaves port.
Yeah, that segment was pretty cringe and (almost certainly unintentionally) ablest.
@@GogiRegion yeah a little.
On the cruise ship story- this is a great scenario to say “I’m sorry that that situation was inconvenient for you, let’s all get on the same page next time so this doesn’t happen again” especially if they insist on blaming you. Maybe add “what do we need to do so that we are all able to enjoy the rest of our time here”. Sometimes if you can’t accept blame you can still help people move on
Pffffftttttttt..... You've never had toxic parents before, have you? Let me put it this way, what emotionally mature and healthy adult would blame their child for a cruise ship leaving without them?
@@fanime1 how else do you shift the blame while not pissing them off?
@rkj5258 You don't. If they truly are toxic parents (and the story does suggest so), then nothing less than fully accepting the blame and groveling for apology will be acceptable to them. And even then, they will continue to bring it up for years. Any discussion of cruise ships, OP's graduation or 18th birthday, whatever location they were doing the cruise in (up to and including the continent), even possibly other things like other people's kids graduating and turning eighteen, etc. will trigger anything from a poke to a rant about that time you let a cruise ship they didn't even want to go on abandon them in a foreign country and it cost SO MUCH MONEY to catch up so that they could try to continue the vacation they were doing solely for you in the first place.
@@fibanocci314 speaking from experience I assume? Sounds rough. I guess I’m used to parents that are reasonable enough to self reflect
@rkj5258 Good, I'm glad! 😀 Hope this helps you understand why some people like the original poster can't just have that perfectly reasonable conversation. Maybe thank your parents for being decent?
12:09-12:36 I admit, I struggle with jealousy pretty regularly (with women who look how I want to look, have the body that I want to have, are dating or in a relationship, or are achieving their dreams). (I'm even Kelly's age now. 25.)
My jealousy is a terrible vice, and one I'm working on, but that advice you gave honestly put things into perspective for me.
If there are things I want, I can have them. I just have to "notice what they have done in their behavior to be successful, and notice what you are doing in your behavior that's making you jealous of them."
It may have meant nothing to you saying that, but it meant something to me, so thank you!!
@7:31 "waving off"
picture someone giving a huff and continuing the conversation they're having while giving a quick, wrist flicking, hand motion away from them toward the person attempting to interject.
Typically done by parents with the attitude "It's just the kid talking, nothing serious."
you're joking. out of all the songs i've heard you come up with "you gotta account for the weight of the wheelchair" is STUCK IN MY HEAD
Secret Microphone! Ahhhhhhhhh! One day those microphones will blow the world’s mind. Ahhhhhhhhh!
The mini-rant about kale was so accurate.
(Sings)”What’s the deal with kale? It’s lettuce with a spine. Shouldn’t be eating that. I don’t wanna eeaat that”
The texture is terrible and even the taste is not good. Can't stand kale.
Daniel: I also choose this man's dead wife's cake
The thumbnail just: “AITA for calling my daughter a loser?” I only thought: no that’s normal my mom does that to me all the time 😃
When the daughter called the mom a bitch, I blinked in surprise. That shit would not fly with my mom
@@yogurttot7072 i'd be dead in 2.5 seconds 💀💀💀💀
I don't know what caused OP's cousin to get to that weight as it could be genetics, medication, mental health, a medical condition, and a variety of other things. A physically and mentally healthy individual generally does not get to that weight.
But as someone who does have mobility issues, none of us can really rely on anyone to fully accommodate us unless they're a carer. I find it incredibly strange that the aunt and uncle aren't available because it sounds like they're her carers and basically abandoned her.
It's just an all round bad situation. It's not fair for the cousin to take it out on other people but I can guarantee the cousin probably has a lot of pent up issues surrounding it and I hope they get the help they need.
You can’t just blame everything on mental health or genetics or meds, if you are 600lbs it is just your fault
@@Hedgehogz856100% I’m so tired of this, “it could be anything causing it” BS.
Medication, genetics, etc, can influence being overweight, but not 400,500,600 lbs. that’s pure overconsumption, no other reason.
I have never met a person who is 350+lbs that doesn’t over consume.
I have met people who due to genetics or medication put weight on easier and have harder times burning it off, but that never leads to obesity. Obesity is purely overconsumption.
@@RoastFlea61your right but a mentally and physically healthy person even if they ate a lot very likely wouldn’t let themselves get to 600lbs like your going to notice how shit you feel well before your get to 600lbs
@@jameson1239 ok but that still makes it their own fault. I don’t care if you have mental issues going on, ignoring them and continuing to stuff your face is your choice. Nobody makes you do it.
Being obese is entirely 100% at fault of the person. Medications, disease, etc, will never cause obesity. They can cause weight gain, but not obesity. Anyone trying to find an excuse for their obesity is simply a shitty person, and I prefer not to associate with people who can’t even accept responsibility for their own choices.
It’s everyone else’s fault that you’re 500lns right?
@@RoastFlea61 …You know that you were considered obese if you’re 180 pounds and 5 foot zero? i’ve been told my entire life that I was obese for being you know within that ratio for most of my life. most strongman and bodybuilders are considered obese as well. I’m not saying that 600 pounds is good or healthy for a human, I’m saying that it is very easy to be considered obese at a very low number. furthermore you don’t get to 600 pounds without a combination of genetics and severe mental issues whatever they may be.
Where is the “you’re not invited “ song that has become stuck in my head for months? Missed opportunity for Amanda here.
That one plus the "block em out your life" song are chronically in my brain
5:56 as some who uses a wheelchair Imma be using this song any time I have to ask someone to push me around!!!
I totally would've done the same thing at the end there. "Oh, you're bringing that prat instead of your girlfriend? Nope, no plus 1 for you."
To answer your question Daniel as a person in a wheelchair who has attended weddings that haven’t been the most accessible, it really depends on where it is. Most people who use wheelchairs can get across some level of grass and be perfectly fine. Obviously mud can be an issue and sand is a major issue for moving around. Most weddings I’ve seen have had some type of temporary boardwalk to get across rougher terrain, but if it’s not possible to have that then you just have to push through it and deal with it (not easy and some will have harder times and need a hand, but it is not physically impossible in most cases) honestly it’s just something we have to deal with, but it’s not anything new. Every day is a challenge to get through life finding the accessible way so it honestly gets tiring to complain about things and I find it better to just deal with it and treat it all like it’s not a big deal. Yes, it’s an inconvenience, but it’s not my place to get angry with someone because the world wasn’t designed around my disability. If I have to get out of my chair and crawl up a few flights of stairs then so be it. Great to see you asking the question though and sorry that’s a good bit of info, but thought I’d share the perspective :)
11:00 bro this is how every "come over we'll make some cool music with my loop" turns out to be i'm dying
Daniel’s commentary on jealousy is spot on. Dude could be a motivational speaker with those facts!
The way that Daniel can just make songs out of no where leaves me in awe
“Im alone”
Haha, same. My dad’s family are all across the world, in a country I can’t go to for safety reasons. My moms side of the family are severely unstable so I don’t know them either. People who know their whole extended family shock me, cause I only know my parents and siblings.
Thank you for the advice! I thought about what successful people have that I don't. Turns out, the answer is functional kidneys. So, once I steal someone's kidneys, I'll be set!
As to the 'abielest' comment (since the rest is obvious): i think it comes down to 'not your wedding'. If you cant go because of a wheelchair then you cant go, just as with any other situation. If you arent close enough to make special arrangements with them then its not that big of a deal to ruin the day for them.
Then why are you inviting someone you know cannot attend? If it’s such a big deal for you to get married in a place that’s not accessible by wheelchair, why are you inviting someone you know needs a wheelchair? That feels like you’re rubbing it in their face that they can’t do things, and that’s really weird and cruel, and those people have every right to bitch you out for it
the cake story is so cuteeee😭the husband just wanting to have a moment from the past to mourn his wife with her special cake recipe is absolutely beautifullll!!!😭
As someone who likes to bake, i would be over the moon if I'd made a recipe and a bakery thought it was good enough they wanted to have permission to regular sell it, like that is so cool!
All cruises specifically and EXPLICITLY tell you.... ALL ABOARD time is inviable and you WILL BE LEFT. No negotiation, do not pass go, do not collect $200.
17:25 “I just wanted to eat her cake again” 😭😭😭
23:04 This is exactly how I feel about the discussion near the end of the first story. It is your wedding, the final decision should come from you and your spouse. If you and your partner come to the agreement that you both want a beach venue, go for it. Sure if there are people attending who might find it difficult to do so because of the venue you should always try your best to accommodate them and make sure the event is enjoyable for everyone. BUT again it is YOUR wedding, imo it should be a day in which the priority centers around you and your significant other.
17:20 i'd love if the bakery called the cake something like "charlene's dark choc cherry cake" or something, that would be rlly sweet
The cruise ship story where the parents are mad she left them behind blows my mind. Dont they realize it wouldve just been more expensive if she had stayed and missed the ship with them? Then they would've had to pay for 3 plane tickets to the next destination versus the 2 they had to pay for. The daughter saved them money
You aren’t alone Daniel. You’ve got us.
It sounds like the cousin tries their best and often helps them but just has a realistic understanding of the practicality of this idea. It also sounds like the overweight cousin has grown to feel entitled to their help and is deflecting. Also if they are worried about their transportation being embarrassing, they should also know that it would be embarrassing if she got stuck and they had to call the fire department or something to get her unstuck and interrupt the wedding.
How did I forget that today was Judgement Day??? JUDGE MEEEEEEEE
I see a theme here. A lot of people seem to think they are assholes if they have to enforce their boundaries or rights because others will not acknowledge them. Sometimes you just have to put your foot down and draw a hard line, even if it comes off as hard to others. Otherwise you're going to be treated as a pushover. And with the wedding, if someone is THIS mad about you inviting THEM WITH THEIR PARTNER to a wedding, then that is extremely sketchy.
I had a friend in highschool like Amanda. I hate it took me too long to see what a douche he was
As a baker, if my husband had a favorite recipe of mine I would want him to find a way to be able to recreate it. And I’d be happy to have it sold. On the kids side, I’d hope the bakery would clarify the recipe for them so it can stay in the family. Could be a really nice opportunity to have a yearly fundraiser at the bakery where on my anniversary X amount of proceeds can go to a charity in her name. Being able to go get your moms baking on a bad day is still a gift.
SUPRISE COMMENT
I work in healthcare - and even though I'm (sadly) well known for my ability to lift and push despite not being built for it ... Err .. NO. Wheelchairs act very differently when someone is overweight, I have yet to push a 300kg human around (feet touching the ground I assume as a bonus difficulty perk) but even 200kgs (rougly 440 p) means that the bushing on the wheels are failing, so you have to fight friction on top of the weight.
I understand that someone going far past the point of no-return would feel miserable, but I'm sorry it is your problem. You can't ask someone else to destroy their body just so you can keep cramming food into your mouth, it's not a clean way to think.
I do stupid shit every day to help lazy people do what they have to do, and my back tells me that I can perhaps keep working in the industry for like 5 more years tops - coming from strangers its one thing, but your own family? Get some dignity!
I need the full version of “Account for the Weight of the Wheelchair” to drop on Spotify soon
Also your kids are going to be besties 80% of the time. 20 % of the time they will be mortal foes in an epic clash of hatred and sibling cruelty. It's the way of things.
i brace myself for the surprise mic and still never expect it
17:25 honestly its so sweet that you would get to still appreciate the recipe made from bakers even if its not made by the inventor
3:21 Pretty sure this person went way out of their way to problem solve and couldn't. IMAGINE if the wc GOT STUCK!!! That would be humiliating. & There's a good chance. Plus we don't know how old/strong op is. It's not their fault and that's really sad on the larger cousin that she can't see that she tried. Unfortunately the cousin does not like the options afforded her so it is up to her if she wants to go or not. THEN cousin took it out on yet another person, The mother of the bride, Who luckily had a spine!!! And she was not going to have that kind of attitude at her daughter's wedding! 😅
"You got to account for the wate of the weelchair!"😂
I've definitely had an old acquantaince who was in a mutual close friend group, he always brings down the energy and makes misogynistic remarks any chance he gets. No way an I inviting that person to my wedding. He definitely was upset after he found out we had the wedding and he was the only one of the group not invited.
"🎶 You gotta account, for the weeeight of the wheelchair 🎶" 🔥
The last story sounds like a sister post to a reddit story called "My (28F) boyfriend (29M) and his best friend (29F) are going on a week-long vacation. They uninvited me" which was likely posted by the brother's ex girlfriend, as the entire situation was very similar to what was described here. The original reddit post has been deleted, but I know Smosh read it a few weeks back in the episode "nightmare vacation stories" if anyone is interested in finding out about that whole situation
PEOPLE DO NOT NEED TO CATER A WEDDING TO ANYONE. I've seen people with ADHD try to do this the other day. These issues are very real things, but the world doesn't revolve around them. The wedding day is for the couple. They can do what they want and let them figure out solutions. I know that sounds selfish, and of course this is within reason, but sometimes you just have to deal with the fact that life is not about you.
I think you mean "not" about you haha