If she really wanted to “save” this child, she could’ve made a plan with the BIL who was a therapist. Had this kid come over and have a few conversations with him. Something simple. Just cause he has a terrible domestic situation doesn’t mean you risk your niece’s well being. You’re just teaching her to sacrifice her boundaries because they aren’t as bad as her tormenter’s rough upbringing/mental wellbeing.
I swear, I got freaking annoyed by the sister reacting to that confirmation that Jeff had a crush on OP’s daughter, like it was some form of victory. A kid who has issues and treats his crush by bullying her is not something to take lightly. It’s that whole “boy will be boys” mindset. A boy picking on a girl because he likes her is not something you should treat as funny or charming. As how OP described in the post, that potentially leads to SA. Are you seriously going to laugh if this boy decides to force a kiss on her or touch her in more ways she’s uncomfortable with? That last commenter explained it so well. The sister’s savior complex is so messed up she’s willing to put her own niece in danger.
My bully confessed years after I left the HS to another that he did all the same stuff that the kid is doing because "he has a crush on me". If he did all of that because it was a "crush", then I can't imagine what would he has done if he hated me for real.
I fucking HATED that shit cuz i had a girl bully at school when i was 8, i'm talking about hits, namecalling and even trying to frame for scratches (didn't worked as i always kept my nails short as a kid), people, even my family, said she had a crush on me and i wouldn't be more grossed in my life Simply awful
I haven't gotten that far but I figured as much. This is not "boys will be boys", they mention Jeff has a bad home life, maybe one of his parents treats the other badly and he thinks that's love and affection coz it's all he knows. An explanation, but not an excuse, he is tormenting an innocent young girl and OP's sister is an arsehole for this, how dare she treat it like a victory
If the sister wants to help this boy so bad, why doesn't she arrange a trip just her family and Jeff? It's better than inviting him to the family trip were Emily will be
I think there are some exceptions, like if it were only doing things like gently tugging her hair, or stealing something the person is reading or paying attention to so that way they'll chase them to get it back. However fistfights, intentional destruction of property and smexual harassment are unacceptable.
@@akitkat-1225 We GOT to be living in different universes if you think those are exceptions, the girls in my old high school would either bully the life out of you or NEVER speak to you again.
@akitkat-1225 no matter the scale, the "boys will be boys" mindset with the 'bothering their crush to get their attention' is NEVER it as it can quickly escalate. no exceptions. not to mention, enabling that kind of behavior at an early age can lead to bad comm skills when they grow up. "gently trugging her hair" can also be annoying af, as someone who'd undergone that kind of attention seeking behavior, (much less "stealing" or im assuming you mean, snatching smth of the girl's). how about just teaching kids to be respectful of other ppl's personal space or them in general. no boy has any business getting that physical with a girl, even if its teasing, if they arent friends who equally have no problem with it.
Sadly the “he bother you because he has a crush on you” is something every girl, sometimes even boys, go through at some point of their lives. Instead of enabling, let’s teach our kids how to respect future partners/friends and how to express their emotions in a healthy way by setting an example.
I am reminded of that one teacher mom who decided that sponsoring her son's bully was a good idea, and repeatedly punished her son for not being on board with that. Some people think 'saving' people even if it means setting their own family on fire to do so is a net positive. These people are IDIOTS. And worse, they are Greater Good Idiots. You know that little parable about how it'd be better to live in a society run by the mob than a corrupt church? At least the mob can be bribed; the zealots will never stop.
It's understandable that you want to address this situation with care, as it involves both family dynamics and your daughter's well-being. Inviting her bully on vacation could create unnecessary tension and potentially harm your daughter's sense of safety and comfort. While it’s good to teach forgiveness and inclusion, it’s equally important to prioritize your daughter's emotional health and set boundaries. Perhaps having a candid discussion with your sister about how this decision might affect your daughter could help find a solution that works for everyone. At the very least, ensuring that the bully has shown genuine remorse and that steps have been taken to resolve the conflict beforehand is crucial.
Anyone else confused by how Jeff is connected to OP. Its like they talk about him like hes family but not at the same time. The family is rich except this kid Jeff
Good on dad for not letting his sister excuse violence as a "crush". We don't harm people we have affection for!
If she really wanted to “save” this child, she could’ve made a plan with the BIL who was a therapist. Had this kid come over and have a few conversations with him. Something simple. Just cause he has a terrible domestic situation doesn’t mean you risk your niece’s well being. You’re just teaching her to sacrifice her boundaries because they aren’t as bad as her tormenter’s rough upbringing/mental wellbeing.
I swear, I got freaking annoyed by the sister reacting to that confirmation that Jeff had a crush on OP’s daughter, like it was some form of victory. A kid who has issues and treats his crush by bullying her is not something to take lightly. It’s that whole “boy will be boys” mindset. A boy picking on a girl because he likes her is not something you should treat as funny or charming. As how OP described in the post, that potentially leads to SA. Are you seriously going to laugh if this boy decides to force a kiss on her or touch her in more ways she’s uncomfortable with? That last commenter explained it so well. The sister’s savior complex is so messed up she’s willing to put her own niece in danger.
then she is the first one to defend jeff if that ever happens
My bully confessed years after I left the HS to another that he did all the same stuff that the kid is doing because "he has a crush on me". If he did all of that because it was a "crush", then I can't imagine what would he has done if he hated me for real.
I fucking HATED that shit cuz i had a girl bully at school when i was 8, i'm talking about hits, namecalling and even trying to frame for scratches (didn't worked as i always kept my nails short as a kid), people, even my family, said she had a crush on me and i wouldn't be more grossed in my life
Simply awful
I haven't gotten that far but I figured as much. This is not "boys will be boys", they mention Jeff has a bad home life, maybe one of his parents treats the other badly and he thinks that's love and affection coz it's all he knows. An explanation, but not an excuse, he is tormenting an innocent young girl and OP's sister is an arsehole for this, how dare she treat it like a victory
If the sister wants to help this boy so bad, why doesn't she arrange a trip just her family and Jeff? It's better than inviting him to the family trip were Emily will be
Stop accepting bullying, harrassment and violence as excusable behavior for a crush. This isn¡t acceptable under any circumstances.
I think there are some exceptions, like if it were only doing things like gently tugging her hair, or stealing something the person is reading or paying attention to so that way they'll chase them to get it back.
However fistfights, intentional destruction of property and smexual harassment are unacceptable.
@@akitkat-1225 We GOT to be living in different universes if you think those are exceptions, the girls in my old high school would either bully the life out of you or NEVER speak to you again.
@akitkat-1225 no matter the scale, the "boys will be boys" mindset with the 'bothering their crush to get their attention' is NEVER it as it can quickly escalate. no exceptions. not to mention, enabling that kind of behavior at an early age can lead to bad comm skills when they grow up. "gently trugging her hair" can also be annoying af, as someone who'd undergone that kind of attention seeking behavior, (much less "stealing" or im assuming you mean, snatching smth of the girl's). how about just teaching kids to be respectful of other ppl's personal space or them in general. no boy has any business getting that physical with a girl, even if its teasing, if they arent friends who equally have no problem with it.
@@akitkat-1225physical assault and stealing? Seek mental help.
@@akitkat-1225No harassing people like that isn't okay or excusable either.
Sadly the “he bother you because he has a crush on you” is something every girl, sometimes even boys, go through at some point of their lives. Instead of enabling, let’s teach our kids how to respect future partners/friends and how to express their emotions in a healthy way by setting an example.
Jeff needs therapy.
Thank you for the update. Your dads a therapist and your sister is mental. When you talk to your sister about this have your dad present 🤷🏼♀️🤦🏼♀️👍🏼.
WTELF is that sister thinking???
I am reminded of that one teacher mom who decided that sponsoring her son's bully was a good idea, and repeatedly punished her son for not being on board with that. Some people think 'saving' people even if it means setting their own family on fire to do so is a net positive. These people are IDIOTS. And worse, they are Greater Good Idiots. You know that little parable about how it'd be better to live in a society run by the mob than a corrupt church? At least the mob can be bribed; the zealots will never stop.
"WTELF" Does the "...EL..." stand for "Ever Loving"?
It's understandable that you want to address this situation with care, as it involves both family dynamics and your daughter's well-being. Inviting her bully on vacation could create unnecessary tension and potentially harm your daughter's sense of safety and comfort. While it’s good to teach forgiveness and inclusion, it’s equally important to prioritize your daughter's emotional health and set boundaries. Perhaps having a candid discussion with your sister about how this decision might affect your daughter could help find a solution that works for everyone. At the very least, ensuring that the bully has shown genuine remorse and that steps have been taken to resolve the conflict beforehand is crucial.
Nephew is the worst cousin to Emily.
Jeff needs professional help and to stay away from other kids right now, especially girls if that’s how he apparently behaves when he likes a girl
Don't trust ur sister with your daughter, ever.
She doesn't care about her.
Anyone else confused by how Jeff is connected to OP. Its like they talk about him like hes family but not at the same time. The family is rich except this kid Jeff
I was confused too but apparently ops nephew is the bully's friend which is how he got invited
bestfriend of his nephew
Jeff is the sister’s son’s friend
Jeff needs therapy and away from his parents because they sound like root if his issues.
W therapist dad tho
Don't apologize for it not being more exciting. For your and your daughter's sake a completely boring story would have been best.
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damn im here early, says no views and uploaded 12secs ago