We Create The Simulation | Episode 167 | NEW RORY & MAL

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  • Опубликовано: 12 май 2023
  • #NewRoryNMal #kanyewest #adidas #dojacat
    Happy Friday…now give us our flowers. Recently we’ve been predicting a lot in the culture and to no surprise the streak continues. Mal was right about Kanye and Adidas coming together, while Julian predicted Tucker Carlson’s next career move. Meanwhile, Tory Lanez was denied a new trial. Staying in music (kind of) does Jay Z have an unclaimed son? Speaking of sons, Robert De Niro at the young age of 79 is having another child…this leads to a wild one-liner from Demaris. We react to Doja Cat’s recent tweets and give props to the Knicks for fighting for another game. Stay till the end as we introduce our new VOICEMAIL segment. If you’d like to have your question answered on air and hear your voice on the pod please subscribe to Patreon!
    Want MORE Rory & Mal? Sign up for the Patreon!
    / newrorynmal
    Join now for exclusive moments and access to the guys + the rest of the New Rory & Mal crew, such as behind the scenes content, unedited/unfiltered episodes, exclusive Patreon-only skits, early looks at merchandise, + so much more!
    Follow The Guys:
    Rory - @ThisIsRory 🍊
    Mal - @Mal_ByTheWay 💰
    Follow The Crew:
    Demaris - @demarisagiscombe 🍼
    Eddin - @ThankYouEddin 🥝
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    #NewRoryAndMal
    Grab your merch & check out the tour dates:
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Комментарии • 454

  • @Duane75
    @Duane75 Год назад +238

    Mal dressed like a convict with privileges 😂

    • @GFTM1
      @GFTM1 Год назад +6

      😂😂

    • @ZenHugo91
      @ZenHugo91 Год назад +21

      This is the most accurate outta pocket , Mal fashion assessment I HAVE EVER READ !! 😭😂

    • @jtholmes3906
      @jtholmes3906 Год назад +25

      Ol west coast mechanic 😂😂

    • @sagevoid
      @sagevoid Год назад +6

      Warden’s pet 😂

    • @rubencastillo5975
      @rubencastillo5975 Год назад +5

      His fit is definitely hip hop!!

  • @Maz_Mitch
    @Maz_Mitch Год назад +147

    “That’s not hip-hop” is a top 2 Mal-ism. It’s hilarious every single time 😂

  • @jay_wats_
    @jay_wats_ Год назад +28

    Telling the homies goodnight: Not hip hop.
    Telling the homies to stay dangerous: That's hip hop.

  • @emmanuelpeck853
    @emmanuelpeck853 Год назад +66

    Mal being wrong on every sports take is hilarious

    • @ricardosoto4256
      @ricardosoto4256 Год назад +1

      He probably won't even address steph's 4-14 shooting from 3 or his 4 turnovers to lead the game in the next pod cause curry is already in his top 5 🤣

    • @twill4360
      @twill4360 Год назад

      This been the case since JBP. I learned a long time ago to not listen to his sports takes 😂

    • @rose4mvp2012
      @rose4mvp2012 Год назад

      He picks the craziest hills to die on too lmao

  • @chellebelles1536
    @chellebelles1536 Год назад +42

    I love this pod. Seriously. On my darkest days you two Seriously perk me right on up. Continue and be blessed

  • @gilfordmccormack8140
    @gilfordmccormack8140 Год назад +13

    It's hilarious when Mal acts like he can't fathom the idea of certain things happening to other people lol 🤣🤣🤣.

  • @VanHiller
    @VanHiller Год назад +29

    Mal asking rory what kind of floral arrangement would he give him is crazy

  • @MVPBRE
    @MVPBRE Год назад +16

    1:36:33 “you really gon let her get dat off” lmaooooo i was fuckin tears

  • @aviana009
    @aviana009 Год назад +15

    Mal paints his nails but flowers is where he draws the line

    • @reekhavoc2932
      @reekhavoc2932 Год назад

      😂😂😂😂😂 Saint fucking John 😂😂😂 what happened to that batty guy

  • @Nondescriptviews
    @Nondescriptviews Год назад +43

    Julian speaks with such conviction about things he clearly knows so little about. SMH.

    • @jibrilbuilder2668
      @jibrilbuilder2668 Год назад +3

      That’s most of society..but I love the confidence Ju be having 😂

    • @ProtaJ
      @ProtaJ Год назад +2

      @@jibrilbuilder2668 Awful comment

    • @oladeebiazazi4538
      @oladeebiazazi4538 Год назад +7

      Nah that’s demaris

    • @chriscraddock2867
      @chriscraddock2867 Год назад +9

      That’s all of them except Rory (most of the time). That is most of society as well. People see a 20 second clip on the internet, and immediately think they know everything about the subject lol. Still love everybody on the pod though. Flaws and all lol

    • @daris7909
      @daris7909 Год назад

      Deadass it's like when they actually talk about some real shit they either dont know WHAT THE FUCK their talking about or they trying to be fucking political correct its literally getting old this was one of my favorite pods but slowly dropping

  • @Ash-io6td
    @Ash-io6td Год назад +56

    I lose brain cells every time y’all talk about politics.

    • @19faf
      @19faf Год назад +6

      True but its a very common understanding of politics unfortunately. They are really not that far off.

    • @arowefilms
      @arowefilms Год назад +2

      Every time

    • @zero-rh8nt
      @zero-rh8nt Год назад +2

      yeah fr. they just need to stay away from anything related to politics. stick to music/culture please

    • @relicreturns
      @relicreturns Год назад +4

      Is this where you come to for Politics???

    • @cpiercejr
      @cpiercejr Год назад +1

      I hate when they talk politics. Do some research or leave it alone.

  • @trinigladiator8830
    @trinigladiator8830 Год назад +6

    Joe made em change back to the old set up and stop holding the microphones. 😂

  • @EpicGammingCrew
    @EpicGammingCrew Год назад +18

    Baby d thinking that dna tests are done by dudes nutting in a cup is sending me

  • @lilshogan01
    @lilshogan01 Год назад +17

    Warriors done… Knicks done… KD done…. All Mal’s sports hopes and dreams gone!

  • @ellisf5013
    @ellisf5013 Год назад +3

    So the witness said he saw a lady shoot another lady but tory was guilty of shooting in the air. Not Meg

  • @nusathechemist
    @nusathechemist Год назад +10

    I feel the energy because I'm spiritual 😅😅😅😅😅

  • @kashoutko1257
    @kashoutko1257 Год назад +15

    Glad my voicemail made it thru “ I was the last one “ but yeah I meant it as I’m outgrowing the person . Thank y’all for da advice it was funny and y’all dropped some gems to fr and I appreciate it 💯I’m 22 no big bros or Ogs really so advice from ppl with more life experience is very helpful thanks and keep up da good work💯

  • @Resilient_Brilliance
    @Resilient_Brilliance Год назад +3

    I'm sick of this Tory Lanez conversation...
    1. If a person shoots at me 5 times, and misses but bullet fragments hit my foot, and i know who did it. They're not making it to court. You should have aimed higher cuz now you a dead man.
    2. If an experienced gun user, shoots a gun 5 times, and misses but bullet fragments hit the targets foot... something sounds off.. she was WALKING away. She is not a small target...
    3. Why intentionally shoot at a 6ft tall woman and dont kill her, but risk 20 years?
    4. If a man shot your friend and beat tf out of you, why would you andwer his call from jail?
    5. Why did the best friend get immunity, and change her entire story up... To not remembering and it didn't go in Tory's favor?
    6. The witness said he didn't see Tory with the gun, he saw a woman with the gun.
    This doesn't add up.

  • @kevthepoet
    @kevthepoet Год назад +18

    Mal really doesn't believe a thing. Why would someone make up a story about a hotel manager sucking their toes? He sounds crazy rn.

    • @992porter
      @992porter Год назад +2

      Bro people do make up hella shit. I’m sure you see the news lol but I think it’s possible

    • @brieljones23
      @brieljones23 Год назад

      Lmfaoooo

  • @jamesclark6226
    @jamesclark6226 Год назад +17

    Mal thinking Tory won’t be ok in prison is crazy 😭😂

    • @xandermartin2118
      @xandermartin2118 Год назад +8

      you can tell he wants something bad to happen lol

    • @leazypeazy1755
      @leazypeazy1755 Год назад +13

      He won’t bro prison is not the internet 😂

    • @hansolodolo92
      @hansolodolo92 Год назад +5

      Who do yall think tory is fr?

    • @jamesclark6226
      @jamesclark6226 Год назад

      Ya obviously don’t know how jail works when your a celeb they don’t put you in the same place as regular people 😭😂 and even if he is they ganna kiss his ass cuz he got money and could pay for shit jail is full of a bunch of niggas with mentality of a 17 year old

    • @LexBundy
      @LexBundy Год назад

      this comment is crazy

  • @aisubjective
    @aisubjective Год назад +6

    Mal said “Whenever a girl came to see you with the King Griffies you know you Forsure hittin” 13:23
    I’m crying rn 😂

  • @KiedaBordeaux
    @KiedaBordeaux Год назад +4

    "I feel the energy bc I'm spiritual.. but" 1:36:32 🤣 🤣 😂 I love Baby D.

  • @arturogarcia9456
    @arturogarcia9456 Год назад +8

    JULIANS A MENACE “they can’t take another one” 😂😂😂😂

  • @clint6795
    @clint6795 Год назад +3

    "Bobby!!!!!!"- Juian clowning Robert Dinero having a kid... LMAO

  • @bulls2320
    @bulls2320 Год назад +6

    *tucker holding the gun* “that’s a red-blooded american right there”

  • @TheFlyHighZone
    @TheFlyHighZone Год назад +8

    Mal standing over eddin sleep with the hammer out is INSANE

  • @khahimv
    @khahimv Год назад +11

    Mal is crazy y he think ppl don’t sleep hard as shit? Lol he always confirms he never had a girlfriend cuz thats prime time when they go thru our phone cuz we be sleep hard as shit 😂

    • @reekhavoc2932
      @reekhavoc2932 Год назад

      😂😂😂😂😂 it takes a damn frying Pan to the face to wake us up 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @allNyoMouf
    @allNyoMouf Год назад +11

    S/o to the gang, especially Baby D wit the pearly white teeth and thighmeat, you mufuccas is hilarious and I appreciate ya'll

  • @superblunt505
    @superblunt505 Год назад +8

    Mals the type to see rain n thinks its raining all around the world

  • @MrOhioPlayer
    @MrOhioPlayer Год назад +4

    In 4 years Mal will be 45. Let that sink in. It Pains Me

  • @N0n1Liciouz
    @N0n1Liciouz Год назад +10

    This episode had me rolling😂😂 great way to start the weekend!

  • @EarlYorkII
    @EarlYorkII Год назад +4

    The last 35 minutes of this podcast is legendary

  • @andremarable
    @andremarable Год назад +5

    I have been fading any of Mal’s sports picks for about 4/5 years now dating back until JBP days and betting against him. THIS SHIT IS INSANE !!!!! Literally hitting at a rate over 80%. FADE MAL TO THE BANK 💰💰💰💰💰💰💰💰💰💰💰💰. Real money not just emojis. I can’t wait until he gives a pick on this lakers Denver series.

    • @WarrenFranceSportsNetwork
      @WarrenFranceSportsNetwork Год назад

      He gonna pick denver. He always wrong lmao. Nigga said Russell Westbrook was the best player in nba lmao.

    • @emmanuelpeck853
      @emmanuelpeck853 Год назад +2

      Lmfaooo all his shit be wrong

  • @R2Dfrank391
    @R2Dfrank391 Год назад +5

    Mal pandering hard for Meg

  • @jruss400
    @jruss400 Год назад +3

    All y’all playoff takes crumbled 🤣🤣♥️🖤♥️🖤🔥🔥🔥🔥‼️

  • @XP9724
    @XP9724 Год назад +20

    Birdmaris calling herself spiritual 💀💀💀

    • @oladeebiazazi4538
      @oladeebiazazi4538 Год назад +7

      I can’t believe she said that shit😂

    • @jay_wats_
      @jay_wats_ Год назад +3

      The way I lost it when I heard that 😭😭😭😭

    • @housept2
      @housept2 Год назад

      I hate her on the show. Insufferable

  • @Blvck215
    @Blvck215 Год назад +4

    Rory said “you knew I was gonna assault her!” 😭😂😂

  • @ThePrentisturks
    @ThePrentisturks Год назад +1

    The voicemail idea it's pretty good.. Very interesting

  • @TheFlyHighZone
    @TheFlyHighZone Год назад +2

    Joe really bullied yall into going bac to the studio lol

  • @Odd1x
    @Odd1x Год назад +1

    The last 30 is so infectious 😂 Yall killed this

  • @xKingLDx
    @xKingLDx Год назад +1

    D saying “I’ll die with my lie” then asking when does the human part kick in when you know you’re guilty…threw me all the way off😂

  • @clint6795
    @clint6795 Год назад +3

    "Jay ducking the cup"-Julian Jules is wild

  • @treylaflame
    @treylaflame Год назад +2

    Best pod on earth yo 😭😭😭😭

  • @d.o.z.e.shaolin7497
    @d.o.z.e.shaolin7497 Год назад +3

    Damn y’all ain’t talk on Eboni K Williams bus driver comment?😂

  • @RaBBy1875x
    @RaBBy1875x Год назад +3

    Absolutely zero mention of the fact that a good reason why Jay might be avoiding the paternity test is because the kids mother was underage at the time. This pod is extremely selective of who they properly scrutinise and who they don’t 😐

    • @user-nn7ct3hk7c
      @user-nn7ct3hk7c Год назад +1

      Are you surprised the dude who’s brother started roc nation won’t slander their biggest artist?

  • @enricks48
    @enricks48 Год назад +1

    I know what Mal talking about! Definitely been in the middle of a dream and consciously know I’m dreaming and wake myself

  • @nusathechemist
    @nusathechemist Год назад +6

    Rory is having a bad day. And it shows.

  • @CareerDropout.
    @CareerDropout. Год назад +1

    "I'm not in that algorithm, I'm sorry" quote💯

  • @gilfordmccormack8140
    @gilfordmccormack8140 Год назад

    I like the new voice mail segment great idea

  • @chinative7517
    @chinative7517 Год назад +3

    If Tory does a retrial, they're going to try him as an adult, but he'll prove to the court that he shouldn't be due to the footage in the Sway interview where he stood up and was the exact same size when he was sitting down.

    • @KaituoKid
      @KaituoKid Год назад +3

      ☠️☠️☠️

  • @MONET8iAM
    @MONET8iAM Год назад +5

    I think Teyana has already started that journey. Remember her Adidas deal that she lost? That came out a couple years before Yeezy Adidas. She didn’t get to release the second colorway of the shoe, but more could have potentially come from that deal. She became the creative director for Pretty Little Thing in 2020 or 2021 and released a collection, but I believe she still holds that role. Part of her stepping away from music was to focus on other things, so I believe that she is capable doing something bigger in fashion, she just wants to do various other things at the same time. It would be dope to see her partner with Aleali May on some sneakers and clothing.

    • @reekhavoc2932
      @reekhavoc2932 Год назад

      She made usher and Chris brown fight!!!!....she's nothing but trouble!!!!

    • @MONET8iAM
      @MONET8iAM Год назад +1

      @@reekhavoc2932 she can’t “make” anyone do anything. We don’t even know what happened, and they don’t care for us know so it’s neither here nor there.

  • @Thoughtitwasadrought
    @Thoughtitwasadrought Год назад +3

    Mal really a psychic

  • @iamPascualRodriguez
    @iamPascualRodriguez Год назад +3

    Something’s just don’t change (Mal’s sports takes)

  • @MrParker-ux2mh
    @MrParker-ux2mh Год назад +1

    01:02:40 Demaris why you sat up and leaned forward like you was finna throw Rory a beatin???? 😂😂😂😂 Rory bout to catch the fade for nuthn!! 😂😂

  • @kylehill7147
    @kylehill7147 Год назад

    “Shake the room” 😂

  • @chevychateau8467
    @chevychateau8467 Год назад +5

    One day I want the pod to address the Diamond emojis Mal be dropping in women’s comment sections. We’ve covered the money bags plenty times but I seen Mal drop diamonds too. What’s that about??? Haha

  • @DoodleBob102
    @DoodleBob102 Год назад

    Great episode 🎉

  • @thestorm6127
    @thestorm6127 Год назад +9

    I hope mal get a chance at teyana taylor. Dude in love can’t tell me he’s not 🤣🤣

  • @gloshines9148
    @gloshines9148 Год назад +1

    Stay Dangerous is some Darkwing Duck shit😂

  • @Kash7_
    @Kash7_ Год назад +1

    🗣️ HEAT NATION 👏🏾👏🏾

  • @407movementBeats
    @407movementBeats Год назад +3

    Julian just be talking. He so misinformed. 😂

  • @billyxblanco
    @billyxblanco Год назад +4

    Lmfaooo mal funny af.
    “Edwin I will kill you with my barehands”
    1:48:09

  • @BailzPagliacci
    @BailzPagliacci Год назад

    lmfao nah this was really comedy at the end

  • @GNukes
    @GNukes Год назад +5

    Finally listening to Joe stop holding the Mics….Pause 😂

    • @19faf
      @19faf Год назад +1

      The old set up looked like there wasn’t much room for the mic holders

  • @kerendiaz4695
    @kerendiaz4695 Год назад

    1:34:17 Rory needs to get the “REM sleep” bars off lol 😅

  • @barrytaylor3514
    @barrytaylor3514 Год назад +4

    Men can have kids in their Nineties. So don't do that.

  • @Pimpin0225
    @Pimpin0225 Год назад +3

    Yo someone put a muzzle on Mal during political talk. This man has no idea about the real world and the gerrymandering done to help elect these officials 🤦🏾‍♀️

  • @islandmanmikep
    @islandmanmikep Год назад +3

    If you think old men can't have babies look up Coleman Young.

  • @hansolodolo92
    @hansolodolo92 Год назад

    Thanks dmaris for keeping it real. Frfr

  • @brieljones23
    @brieljones23 Год назад

    Not them frying Tory Lmfaoo

  • @stephenjohn841
    @stephenjohn841 Год назад +19

    Remember about 3 pods ago when mal predicted the warriors were gonna wash the lakers 😂 all time worst sport takes continues

    • @chriscraddock2867
      @chriscraddock2867 Год назад +3

      Mal be so wrong about sports a lot lol. He be wrong about music sometimes too

    • @stephenjohn841
      @stephenjohn841 Год назад +1

      ​@chriscraddock2867
      D: who do they play if the beat the heat
      Mal: Looking like Philly
      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
      Yall know how much money we could have made betting against all of mals sports picks?

    • @chriscraddock2867
      @chriscraddock2867 Год назад

      @@stephenjohn841 big facts.. Honestly us laker fans hope he picks the nuggets

  • @CareerDropout.
    @CareerDropout. Год назад +1

    To that guy at the end tell em to watch forgetting sarah marshall

  • @tonysosa751
    @tonysosa751 Год назад

    Mal definitely said go be legendary 😂

  • @tylercollins8486
    @tylercollins8486 Год назад +1

    Tell baby D watch how she rubbing them knees 👀👀 lol

  • @orianeyeboue-kouame2822
    @orianeyeboue-kouame2822 Год назад

    Thank God the lighting is so much better

  • @swayyung7448
    @swayyung7448 Год назад +6

    Can ya get everyone else better seating

    • @rascalmania
      @rascalmania Год назад

      Agreed, and laptop stand for baby d and julian

  • @civilenggggg
    @civilenggggg Год назад

    "goodnight" IS CRAZY

  • @KiedaBordeaux
    @KiedaBordeaux Год назад +5

    Mal's fit is three hard this ep.

  • @nusathechemist
    @nusathechemist Год назад +4

    Yooo. Baby D legs are huge. I think we need to stop calling her baby.

    • @reekhavoc2932
      @reekhavoc2932 Год назад

      Yeah wtf!!!!! Those legs are gigantic!!!!!!!!

  • @THEDUBYUZ
    @THEDUBYUZ Год назад

    Mal being real with that walking in the room shit. That comes from living in sketch places and being alert all the time.

  • @cb312luv
    @cb312luv Год назад +3

    I don’t know if it’s the shrooms, but y’all hilarious right now 1:45:23

  • @jamarrobinson1942
    @jamarrobinson1942 Год назад +1

    39:23 "Fuck you! What you mean you hate to defend me?!"
    MAL IS FUCKING HILARIOUS LMFAOOOOOO

  • @mommaluvcam
    @mommaluvcam Год назад +1

    Demaris just be talking 🙃

  • @Silentknight003
    @Silentknight003 Год назад +2

    guys do not take relationship advice from 5 single people with some clear mental trauma loll

  • @dublife572
    @dublife572 Год назад +2

    They will never let Ye walk completely out of the door. Too much $.

  • @King-li9ko
    @King-li9ko Год назад +1

    Somebody tell Rory red Octobers are going for 15k+ not 1500 lmao

  • @dumisa7
    @dumisa7 Год назад +1

    What exactly is the difference between being "forced" and "having no choice", Rory? There is none. Sometimes Rory is just contrary to be contrary.

  • @xandermartin2118
    @xandermartin2118 Год назад +11

    “Goodnight Mal” - eddin
    “Eddin I will kill you with my bare hands” - Mal
    😂😂😂😂

  • @timgonzales2891
    @timgonzales2891 Год назад

    He was found liable in civil court. He wasnt convicted by a criminal court. No matter how people may feel about that, they are two very different things. Its not "on his jacket".
    These things tend to happen when a criminal case fails.

  • @cpiercejr
    @cpiercejr Год назад +2

    Voting is serious, so its hard for me to see them as serious adults. It must be the privilege or something.

  • @tonysosa751
    @tonysosa751 Год назад

    Naw I’m w baby D 😂😂😂. Definitely feel that energy thorough the spirit

  • @jahmaalblake6911
    @jahmaalblake6911 Год назад +1

    Yo who tf is Bobbly Swagger? 1:34:47 shit had me dead !

  • @SkyeDaMan
    @SkyeDaMan Год назад +9

    1:56 Demaris really have no class, but pretends she does. “Bokay” of flowers 😂😂😂

    • @billyxblanco
      @billyxblanco Год назад +4

      She from upstate they can’t talk !

    • @laurenjackson2810
      @laurenjackson2810 Год назад

      Btw she actually pronounced correctly, dummy. Smh. Y’all just be saying anything to be some haters.

  • @nia4842
    @nia4842 Год назад +1

    Demaris pronounced bouquet correctly. Tomato, tomato, though.

  • @TheTerriflowerShow
    @TheTerriflowerShow 11 месяцев назад

    Mail is so disconnected from reality😂

  • @Chrisakacdo
    @Chrisakacdo Год назад

    Mal dressed like skully from The Wood 😂😂😂

  • @brieljones23
    @brieljones23 Год назад

    Cat dog😂😂😂😂 Garfield

  • @sagevoid
    @sagevoid Год назад +3

    Damaris is toxic. 😂

  • @ToDaMaxxx
    @ToDaMaxxx Год назад +2

    Demaris, Jay cannot owe anyone child support as an adult. If his mother would've tried that herself prior to her death then he could tried to sue but only if he was also granted her estate. However the point is she wouldve had to have sued.
    She didnt.
    And even if he still isnt looking at anything.
    Sorry.
    He is an adult

  • @michaelfreeman124
    @michaelfreeman124 Год назад +1

    This place...wow.

    • @reekhavoc2932
      @reekhavoc2932 Год назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 you like? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂